Chapter 32: What's in a Name?

Parker asked to visit. Bucky couldn't tell if this was just an "I miss you, let's hang out" kind of visit or a "We need to talk visit," so he prepared himself for either. He brought MJ and Carol May along with him, which made Bucky lean towards the former. Turns out, he was wrong.

"So we've been thinking about names," he said once they sat down in the living room. Carol May crawled around on her hands and knees searching for Alpine. Bucky knew she'd never find him. He was on top of the fridge, out of her eyeline, because he didn't like company.

Ever since Parker and MJ told everyone about the new baby, Bucky had alternated between growing excited for the future and reliving his sorrowful past. He dreamed about the day Parker and MJ told them about Carol May, how Steve had literally begged him not to let him die before he met that child. Bucky might've kept that promise he never made, but there were now four, soon to be five, children in the family who he would've wanted to meet just as badly. Steve should've been here to hold all of them, and it was so fucking unfair that he wasn't.

"What are the contenders?" he asked.

"There's…uh, there's really only one," Parker said hesitantly. "But we wanted to ask your permission first."

His permission? Why would they need that?

"We were thinking Benjamin Steven," MJ said.

Benjamin Steven. So that's why they wanted to ask him first. They wanted to name their son after his husband. After Steve. Their firstborn daughter would bear Carol's name, and their son…Steve's? The mere notion made him so emotional that he had to bite his knuckle to keep from crying.

"You okay?" Parker asked.

He nodded. Once he felt composed enough to actually use his voice, he said, "Absolutely. Steve…Steve would be honored."

"Thank you. We think he would too."

They stayed for another two hours, playing with Carol May and chatting about what life with two children would be like. All four of them had spent their entire lives thus far as only children, except for the brief interlude when Parker and MJ were foster siblings. None of them knew very much about what it was like to grow up sharing parents, a house, and pretty much everything with another person.

"I'm excited to have a brother," Carol May insisted. "But a sister is better."

"I'm afraid a brother's all you're getting for now," MJ said.

"For now?" Parker raised his eyebrows at her.

"That's a conversation we're not having for a long time."

"Okay."

Bucky leaned into Carol May to tell her, "You're the oldest and the only girl, so you'd better keep all these boys in line."

She hugged him around the neck. "I will."

~0~

Nick waited almost two years before he finally got matched with a guide dog that suited him. There had been one other failed visit after the first; that dog was the right size and speed, but they discovered through the training process that some undesirable behaviors hadn't been as thoroughly trained out during the puppy years as they should've been. He was dangerously distracted by birds, to the point he nearly pulled Nick over one time. Nick felt bad that he didn't get the job, but he was assured the dog went back to the family that had fostered him as a puppy and was living his best life.

He started to lose hope of ever getting a guide dog when the third call came. Then Nick met Talos. Their connection was instantaneous. Talos laid his head on Nick's thigh and wanted to be scratched behind the ears endlessly, but when it was time to train, he stood stoically for his harness and did his job with single-minded determination. The trainer told Nick after their first day that their partnership was one of the best he'd seen in many years of working here.

Nick quickly got the hang of the schedule here. Breakfast and bathroom break for both of them, and then morning lessons. His lessons consisted of learning how to care for the equipment, practicing navigation with Talos and their instructor, and adjusting to orientation and mobility with a dog instead of a cane. After so many years of using a cane, it was hard for him to break the habit of flicking his wrist back and forth with every step. Then came lunch, another bathroom break, and afternoon lessons. Before pursuing getting a guide dog, Nick hadn't really thought about this, but guide dogs had to poop on a schedule so their partners knew when they had to pick it up. Luckily—or not so luckily, rather—that was task rather easily completed with help from his senses of smell and touch.

He also got a chance to meet all the other students in the program at this time. Nick had interacted with other blind people his first two times here, but he didn't get along with those groups quite like this one. This group happened to consist almost entirely of elderly men. He wasn't sure if he should be proud or embarrassed that he fit right in. Most of them were fascinated with him, having never met a person whose blindness was caused by literally not having eyeballs.

After dinner, he had the evening to do pretty much whatever he wanted. He alternated between sitting in the student lounge chatting with all the old men or calling Mom, Jake, and Dawn. His entire family was beyond excited that he'd finally been matched with a dog that would actually work.

Talos could do things that Nick's cane never could. He wouldn't let Nick go forward if a crosswalk wasn't clear of cars, and he stopped for low-hanging obstacles that he'd hit his head on. The first time that happened, Nick had no idea what was going on. He didn't figure it out until the instructor let go of his other arm and told him to reach forward. A partially broken tree branch was hanging over the sidewalk and would've scratched his face to hell if Talos hadn't stopped.

"That's amazing. I'm gonna save so much money on Band-Aids."

Two weeks flew by way too fast. Nick was excited to bring Talos home and incorporate him into his daily life, but he also didn't want to leave this community. He always felt somewhat alienated among sighted people, except for his family and friends who were used to accommodating him. Everyone here was either blind or so used to interacting with blind people that they knew all the dos and don'ts.

At the graduation ceremony, he got to meet the family that raised Talos as a puppy. They were all in tears to know that he had a partner now. Nick even learned the meaning behind his name. Talos was a giant bronze automaton tasked with protecting Crete from invaders, in Greek myth. Now he was going to protect Nick from low-hanging branches and those damn quiet electric cars.

~0~

MJ was having one of those days where she was so tired and uncomfortable that she didn't want anything to do with anybody. Parker could tell she was fighting not to snap at him or Carol May all morning, so he offered to take Carol May to the park that afternoon to give her some alone time. "Whatever, loser," MJ snapped. They really needed to break the habit of using that particular nickname before Carol May picked it up.

Parker took the statement for the enthusiastic yes he knew it to be. "Get your shoes little miss, we're going to the park!" he called.

Carol May bounded towards the front door and almost toppled onto her shoes in her excitement. Parker knelt down to help her get them on, said goodbye to MJ, and started the ten-minute walk to their favorite park. He kept his hand clasped in Carol May's as she jumped over cracks in the sidewalk. "Is Mommy okay?" she asked while they were waiting for a stoplight to change.

"Yeah, she's okay. It's hard work carrying a baby and she gets tired sometimes, that's all." He poked her in the belly. "You get cranky when you're tired. Just like your mom."

"No!" she insisted. The light changed, and they crossed the street.

"What? You don't want to be like your mom? That's crazy. She's one of the coolest people I know."

"I don't wanna be cranky," she clarified.

"Oh, okay. Then as long as you go to bed on time, you'll be golden."

"It's not bedtime."

"You're right, it's not bedtime yet. It's park time!" They'd arrived. Carol May shot straight to her favorite sandbox. There was another girl around her age already playing there and, without a hint of shyness, Carol May introduced herself and asked if she could play too. The girl stared at her, bewildered, before nodding. Carol May plopped down and happily began building a sand dune next to the other girl's. Parker sat down on the bench beside the sandbox to watch.

"She's very friendly," someone said: a tall, skinny guy in a Ramones T-shirt sat next to him on the bench. Parker had that exact same T-shirt, a Christmas gift from his parents.

"Yeah. Don't know where she gets it. Her mom and I were both shy at this age."

"How old is she?"

"Almost three."

"Wow."

"Is that your daughter?" Parker asked of the other girl. She was cute, with blonde hair in pigtails.

"Yeah. She's four. Though it sounds like your kid talks just as well."

Parker smiled proudly. People complimenting his kid flustered him even more than people complimenting him. "Yeah, she picked it up pretty quickly. What's your daughter's name?"

"Gwen."

"Oh, I like that. I've never met anyone named Gwen before."

"Yeah, it's…" the man paused for a moment, a hollowness behind his eyes. "It's after her mom.

Parker knew that look all too well. "My daughter's name is Carol May. After my sister and my aunt." He tried to infuse the same solemn tone the other man had used. Neither of them directly addressed it, but Parker knew they both understood that they had far more in common than just having young daughters.

He reached out a hand to shake. "I'm Peter, by the way."

Parker smiled and shook his hand. "Parker."

The man chuckled.

"What's so funny?"

"That's my last name."

"That's a weird coincidence." Parker debated whether telling Peter the history of his name was TMI for a park bench interaction, and ultimately decided to just go with it. He'd probably never see this guy again; what did it matter if he thought Parker was a complete lunatic? "It gets weirder," he continued.

Peter looked at him expectantly.

"Peter Parker is my given name. Parker was just a nickname that stuck so hard I legally changed it."

"Wow. That is…not what I expected to hear on a park bench on a Saturday afternoon. Is Peter really such a bad name that you legally changed it?"

"No, no, I like the name Peter. It's a long story."

Peter chuckled. "Okay, okay. I'll admit Parker does sound cooler."

Carol May, already bored with piling sand, crawled up onto the bench and attempted to weasel her way into Parker's lap. "Daddy, did you make a new friend?" she asked.

Parker gently fought her off, not wanting to get sand all over himself. "You're all sandy, stop climbing me until you dust off." Carol May stood on the bench and smacked her hands against her pants a few times. "Thank you," he said.

"You didn't answer my question."

Parker picked her up and turned her around to face the other man. "Carol May, this is Peter. He's Gwen's dad."

Peter smiled and waved. Carol May waved back, then pointed at him. "My daddy has that shirt."

"You a Ramones fan?" Peter asked.

"Who isn't?"

"Mommy," Carol May supplied.

"What? Your mom loves the Ramones."

Carol May put her hand beside her mouth and loudly whispered to Peter, "No she doesn't."

Peter started laughing. Parker patted Carol May on the shoulder and sent her back to the sandbox to play. "She's a trip," Peter said.

"Yeah. She got her mother's mouth. This next one's a boy, so I'll be glad not to be outnumbered anymore."

"Your wife's pregnant?" Peter's face lifted with the same joy people always expressed when they learned a married couple was expecting, but in his eyes shone a hint of desperate longing, almost jealousy. Parker immediately regretted mentioning it.

"Yeah. She's due in June."

"Congratulations."

"Thank you." Parker itched to change the subject because he knew this must be uncomfortable for Peter. He tore his gaze away, anything to avoid the raw expression on Peter's face, and ended up seeing the strangest display he'd ever witnessed on a playground. A man easily ten years his senior was dangling from the monkey bars by his knees doing crunches while a redhead looked on with heart eyes. He came to a stop and Parker half expected him to fall, but instead the woman walked up and kissed him.

"That is so weird," Peter remarked.

"Agreed."

"I mean, of all the places…a kids' playground?"

"I know."

"Talk about a PDA."

They both chuckled and tore their gazes away as the couple released each other, not wanting to get caught staring. Although, if you were going to make out upside down in public, you were bound to get stared at, so Parker didn't feel particularly bad about it. The sun disappeared behind a cloud. Peter looked up and remarked, "Looks like it's about to rain."

Parker forgot to check the weather before he decided on this park trip. MJ was not going to be happy that they were back so soon, but she'd be even less happy if he let Carol May stay out here in the rain.

"Hey Gwennie, let's go home, okay?" Peter said.

"Okay." She patted her sand pile a few more times for good measure and left the sandbox. Parker told Carol May the same thing.

"Is Mommy still tired?"

"Yeah. So when we go home, we're going to have to find something quiet to do together so she can rest. Sound good?"

"Can we do a puzzle?"

"Sure."

Parker didn't realize they were about to part ways without saying goodbye until it was almost too late. He turned around and said, "It was nice to meet you, Peter."

"You too, Parker."

Hopefully, he saw the man again someday, but he didn't hold out too much hope. They came to this park at least twice a week and he rarely saw the same people here.

After NWH...I just couldn't resist.