By Zetta Zofia
Disclaimer: Characters are Not Mine! Belong to the wonderful, fabulous, absolutely amazing genius J.K. Rowling.
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Chapter Two- The Second Year SecretAfter the fun of first year, James returned to Hogwarts without a complaint. The train ride was only slightly different from the previous year, with Lily riding in compartment across the hall with her Ravenclaw friends, so it was just the four boys. That was acceptable though, as the four boys had all grown to be quite good friends.
Their classes were still the same, as were the teachers. The only exception was Defense Against Dark Arts, in which the teacher had changed yet again. The new Seventh years were cheerfully telling everyone that the job was cursed, and that they would never have the same Dark Arts teacher two years in a row.
James, Sirius, Peter, and Remus were making a name for themselves as the Marauders. Often, they would play little pranks on each other, the teachers, their fellow students, and once in a while, on the entire school.
Their pranks, while usually played with the intention of getting a few laughs, were well known throughout the school, and the Slytherins, who were often victimized by them, began to grow even more aggressive towards the Gryffindors.
One who bothered them more than the rest was Severus Snape. He and Sirius had been in a fight during a Flying Lesson the year past, and both had ended up in the hospital afterwards.
James had made Sirius feel better by sticking Dung Bombs underneath the Slytherin table that night, and then telling Sirius all about it.
James was quite happy to be at Hogwarts, with two exceptions. He was very disappointed that Lily, who he still felt a little more than friendly towards, and still made him feel rather funny, had started hanging out with the Ravenclaws quite a lot. As a result, her grades had gone up even higher, but it also meant that the only time they saw her was during classes, and even then she spent much of her time talking to her other friends instead of them. She sat by James in Transfiguration and Dark Arts though, and they often spent the time talking through lessons. To make up for that, James had to help her with her Transfiguration, which he was becoming quite good at.
The other disappointment was his new friend Remus. Remus was a very good friend, Sirius and Peter agreed. But about once a month, he disappeared. He claimed to be visiting his ailing mother, or in the hospital wing, but neither James, nor Sirius, nor Peter believed him. They'd seen Mrs. Lupin at the end of first year, and she'd looked perfectly healthy to them. And he couldn't have been in the hospital wing, because Sirius had been in and out at odd times all year, and had never once seen Remus, despite his claims to being there.
Anytime it came up, Remus got a little edgy, and would change the subject, or brush it off.
But when he disappeared two weeks into the new year, James had had enough.
He, Sirius, and Peter had gathered into the library with a calendar, and were trying to remember the dates in which he'd disappeared. James was marking them on the calendar, and so he was the first to note the strange pattern of all of the disappearances but one falling around the full moon.
Nonetheless, he figured that it was far too extreme of an idea to be true, so he did not mention anything about the dates to his friends, but instead, that night he slipped out to the library and borrowed several books.
The next month passed, and as luck would have it, their Defense Against Dark Arts Class began to study werewolves.
Remus was in class that day, but had already informed his friends that he was going to see his mother that night.
Seeing as it was Wednesday, James didn't know why he didn't just wait until Friday night, but had made no comment.
Lily sat next to him doodling. He watched as her sketch began to take on the form of a werewolf, one depicted in horrific detail in the book, and Professor Roach, Head of Slytherin House, described them. "Werewolves are violent beasts on their night under the moon," he said, his gaze shifting over to each student. "But the rest of the month, you would never know what they were. They are completely normal, capable of hiding their true selves with barely a problem, except for that one night a month."
James happened to glance over at Remus and found him white faced and staring down at his book, which depicted a sketch of a werewolf attacking people.
"They have an extreme dislike of silver," Roach continued, and pulled out a long thin knife blade that shone in the dim light of the room. "If it touches their blood, they will die. Touching their skin with it will cause a painful rash, and in extreme cases, such as if a werewolf were surrounded by it, or it were held near vital organs for a prolonged period, could also lead to death. To digest silver in any form would be fatal for the wolf."
He set the knife down with a clunk and James saw Remus jump a little. He frowned slowly and looked down at his book.
Lily was finished with her drawing, and turned to the next free page in her notebook.
"Werewolves, for a few days before turning and a few days after, are somewhat weaker than normal. They can appear to be ill, but their bodies are often just storing up the energy that they will need to change forms come the full moon."
He unrolled a moon chart and pointed to the one labeled 'full moon'. "Not a second before, not a second after, but at the very moment the full moon has risen and presents itself to the night will a werewolf change into its beastly form. Their most dangerous asset is their teeth, long rows of sharp teeth that can easily tear the skin from a man's bone. And note that I did not say an animal's bone. Werewolves will not attack animals, only human beings."
James had stopped pretending to be interested in his notes, and was watching Remus with some concern. He looked ready to be ill. "Their bite is one of the most painful bites in the world, and its affects, while not fatal, are to transfer the werewolf into you as well. That is why society is as terrified as it is of them. The idea of a werewolf biting you sends shivers running through you, and the werewolf might never know what happened. Often times, the werewolf will not remember much of anything from the night." Roach stopped speaking abruptly, looking over the room. "For your homework, you will write a foot long essay on werewolves and their dangers. It will be worth twenty points, and is due Friday."
James figured out why he'd stopped there when the bell rang. Remus stood up quickly, not looking at them. "I don't feel well," he said flatly. "I'm going to see the nurse."
He didn't wait for a response, but hurried out of the room.
Lily looked after him, surprised, but shrugged and smiled at James. "I'll see you later," she said, but James touched her arm before she could go.
"Can I have that drawing?" he asked. "The werewolf one?"
Lily looked at him strangely. "I guess... why?"
He forced himself to act casually. "I like it. I've always thought werewolves were interesting." And he wanted to see what Remus's reaction would be.
Lily tore it out of the notebook. "If you say so. See you later!" she called, waving to them, and then she and Christie left.
"What's up with Remus?" Sirius asked, yawning. He'd slept through most of the class. "And do we have homework?"
James nodded tersely. "Yeah, but we're not doing it just for class."
Sirius nodded, looking at James as if he were losing his mind. "Of course not! We always have a higher purpose for doing homework." He rolled his eyes when James gave him a look.
James sighed. "Meet me in the library tonight, all right? Right after we eat." He glanced at the clock. "I'm skipping Potions. Tell Madame Zuni I'm sorry, and that I've gone to bed or some such."
He waved absently and ran out of the classroom.
Sirius and Peter looked at each other curiously. "If he's skipping," Peter said. "I'm not going."
"Let's go find him then," Sirius said, and they hurried off after him.
* * *
With books already stacked up high enough to be in danger of falling, James carried more over to the table. He set them down with a thud, ignoring the look the librarian sent him. He pulled out a fresh piece of parchment and began to take notes on them, going over each book in painstaking detail.
After an hour of this, Sirius and Peter arrived, and gave him somewhat shocked looks. "You're here," Sirius said slowly, looking at the books on the table. "Doing homework?"
James barely spared them a glance. "Either get a book and take notes or get out."
Peter hesitated, then picked up a book, gingerly opening the cover, which was darkened with mildew and illegible. "Werewolves: Man or Beast."
Sirius bent down to look at a stack. "Werewolves, Full Moon Monsters, What Goes Bump in the Night, The Beastly Moon..."
"Read or shut up," James said again, this time even less patiently.
They sat and began to read, taking notes.
Sirius picked up on it first, and looked at James with rising curiosity. "You have moon charts?" he asked.
James recognized the tone in his voice and finally set the quill down and looked at them. "You don't think I'm imagining things?"
"Imagining what?" Peter asked. He still thought they were researching for homework.
"Hang on," Sirius said, and went over to speak to the librarian for a moment. He returned carrying several rolls of parchment. He flipped through them, mentally comparing dates, and then looked at James. "I didn't get this month's."
James nodded grimly and held up a roll of paper. "It's tonight."
Sirius let out a long breath and leaned back in his chair. "Well," he said slowly. "That explains a lot."
"What?" Peter asked again.
They looked at each other, then at Peter.
"We think Remus is a..." Sirius caught himself and leaned in closer to whisper. "We think he's a werewolf."
Peter's eyes went wide and he looked at the picture on the cover of one of the books. A monstrous, slobbering beast with long teeth that resembled fangs more than anything else. He gulped.
"Write your essays," James said. "Otherwise someone might think it's strange that we're researching this so much and then not bothering to write the essay."
Peter managed to nod a little.
Sirius rubbed the side of his neck and nodded. "Yeah. But we need to decide what to do about Remus first."
"Do we tell him we know?" James wondered. "Or let him go on keeping the secret."
"We tell him," Peter said, surprising the other two. They looked at him, and he looked a little flustered to have the attention for once. "I-I just don't think he'd feel as bad if he knew we knew."
Sirius nodded thoughtfully. "He doesn't like lying," he noted. "So he probably hates lying about this." He closed one of the books. "He's got a fear of rejection though," he mused. "It's why he was so cold towards us for a while last year, I'd bet my broom on it." He looked at James. "That explains why he won't try out for Quidditch too."
"How?" Peter and James wondered, not following him.
Sirius shrugged. "Well, he'd be guaranteed to miss a few practices, and if it ever falls on a Friday night, he'd be shot come morning. It's a shame, he's got great potential on a broom."
"Makes sense," James agreed.
"Or he could just not like Quidditch," Peter said, but knew to expect glares, which he got.
"So when do we want to tell him?" Sirius asked. "I think we should do it soon. Certainly before the next moon."
James and Peter agreed. "Shall we talk to him tomorrow?" James suggested. "He'll probably come to class late, but we could talk to him after the day's over with."
Sirius nodded his agreement, and the three looked at each other for a long moment. "Must be tough on him, going through it, and then not having anyone to talk about it with."
James nodded, but his mind was already dismissing it. "That'll change after we talk to him. He can tell us whatever he's comfortable with, and we'll try to make him feel better about it."
The other two agreed.
* * *
Remus was bone weary by the time he'd finished his classes for the day. He'd had a bad night. Images of the werewolves in the textbook had plagued his mind up until the last moment he'd changed, and it had made the change even harder. And that meant that the wolf in him had wanted to hurt someone or something, so he'd hurt himself.
The bed which had been in the corner of the room had been dragged out in the middle, the last of the sheets on it having been ripped to shreds. One of the posters on the corner had been broken off, and he'd found it chewed to bits underneath the bed, where he'd woken up.
His stomach had a long gash on it, and his arm had several marks where he'd chewed on his own body, and it made him cringe just to think of it. The nurse, a soft-spoken old woman who had to be nearing her hundreds, had cried softly as she'd bandaged his arms up.
As soon as she'd finished, he'd hurried away. The last thing he wanted was pity from her. To some extent, he'd almost rather have her despise him for what he was. Pity hurt too much. It made him feel even worse about his condition, and it made him want to wallow in self-misery.
And he did enough of that already.
He limped up the stairs to the room he shared with Peter, Sirius, and James. He hoped they were at dinner. He just didn't feel like dealing with them. He hated to lie to them, but it was necessary. And he needed to check what excuse he'd given them for leaving. He was pretty sure it had been that he was sick, but it could have been that his mother was sick too. They were both frequent stories he used, and normally he'd have checked his journal to see, but he'd left his journal under his bed for the night.
When he reached his door, he heard noises coming from inside and braced himself to act normal.
Sirius was the first to greet him with a small wave, and Remus immediately knew something was wrong. Sirius normally wore a grin or a smirk, or was half asleep, but now he watched him enter with a completely serious expression on his face.
Peter sat on his bed, looking nervous, and James sat at his desk.
They all looked at him as he came in, and James set his homework aside. "Hi," he said.
Remus fought back the fear that rose in him. "What's going on?"
Sirius looked grim. "We want to talk to you," he said, and his voice was surprisingly kind. There was no accusation there, but Remus still stayed tense.
"How was your mum?" James asked politely.
Apparently, he hadn't been sick, Remus realized grimly. He had to learn to remember these things. "Not good."
Sirius nodded. "We know you're a werewolf."
Remus felt the breath rush out of his lungs and the room began to spin. He steadied himself by reaching for a bedpost, and tried to hide the fact that his hands were suddenly shaking. "Wh-what do you mean?"
Sirius frowned, tilting his head and looking at him. "We checked all the dates," he said simply. "The symptoms match up. The discrepancies, well, they didn't."
James noticed that Remus had grown paler and sighed. "Take a seat, Remus. We don't hate you for it or anything, we don't think any less of you."
"More, actually," Sirius admitted. "It can't be easy having to do this every month."
Remus, still shaking, sat down on his bed. He looked terrified now.
James, Sirius, and Peter exchanged looks and converged on him, Sirius and Peter sitting on both sides of him, and James sitting across from him, on Peter's bed.
"Really, Remus," James said patiently. "We don't want to hurt you. We want to know how to help you."
"We haven't told anyone," Sirius said. "And we won't. We swore this afternoon that, no matter what happens to us today, tomorrow-"
"Or ever after," James added.
"Or ever after," Sirius agreed. "That we would never, ever tell anyone without your permission."
"No one," James repeated.
Remus stared at them all, still too emotional to speak.
Peter, who had been nodding along with everything they'd said before this, finally spoke. "We're your friends, Remus. Trust us."
Sirius finally grew impatient waiting for him to speak. "Anyway," he said. "We just wanted to tell you that so you don't have to lie any more. Oh, and we also wrote up the essay for you. It'll get you an A, of course."
He beamed, and James sent him a look. "It'll get an A," James agreed. "But only because I wrote it."
And then, figuring that Remus needed more time to adjust, they left him alone on the bed and went back to what they were doing, though they all sent him worried looks once in a while.
It took Remus a full week before he was willing to talk about it.
It was Friday night and they were all in the room, Sirius flipping through a Quidditch book, James polishing his broom, and Peter sitting on the floor next to him, watching with interest.
Remus studied them for a long moment, and then began to speak. "I was seven years old," he said quietly, and they all looked at him. Sirius marked his page, and James put away his broom. Remus didn't look at them. "We were out having a picnic, me and my parents. A friend of mine was over, a boy named Louis. We were playing hide and seek. My parents are both wizards, but neither of them were thinking about the full moon. They didn't even realize we were missing until it was bed time, and then they started looking for us. The moon had already risen, and we were lost in the forest. I don't remember much of what happened. I blocked a lot of it out. I remember that me and Louis were talking about the best hiding place in the woods, and arguing where it was. We didn't even know we were lost then. And then we both realized it was dark out, and got scared."
James crossed the room then and brought him tissues. Remus hadn't even realized he was crying, and looked down for a moment, ashamed. But when he looked at James again, he found James watching him with gentle concern, not scorn, or amusement, or cruelty. Remus looked down again. "The werewolf attacked us. He attacked Louis first, and there was so much blood... I got scared, and I wasn't strong enough to fight the werewolf, and I ran. The werewolf must have known I was running, because he followed me. He bit me, and it hurt beyond anything I've ever felt before." Not even thinking about it, Remus tugged off his shirt, showing them the silvery white scar on his mid section.
"Oh geez," Sirius whispered. Peter was pale, and James's eyes flickered with sympathy for a moment.
Remus ignored them. "I don't remember much after that, but I woke up in my own bed. Louis was dead, my mum told me. The werewolf was caught that night, and was attacking someone else. The wizard who caught him killed him. His name was Donald Avery. He didn't have any family- he's not related to the Avery at school here. The Ministry divided his money up between me and Louis's family. They figured out what I was quick enough. People were scared, and no one wanted us around any more. Mum was furious, and she and my father had a row over moving. He didn't want to, but she didn't want to make me live with the people who'd call me names or some such. I went to bed one night, and the next morning, my father was gone, and he'd taken the money Avery had left us." Remus shrugged painfully. "We left town, moved deep into the woods, and mum got a job working for a rich old man who lived up there. A Muggle. We weren't sure what would happen to me about schooling until Dumbledore came over to the house one day and worked out a plan." He sighed and wiped his face with the tissue. "I'm here on a scholarship of sorts. Mum couldn't afford to pay, so Dumbledore worked out a deal with me, that as long as I stayed out of serious trouble, I'd be fine."
"Sirius trouble?" James said lightly. "I think you've got a problem, Remus."
Sirius scowled at him. "Be nice, Jimmy."
Remus managed a small smile. "I was very worried about that, actually. But Dumbledore told me that he meant the kind of trouble that would get a person suspended, or expelled... He said that so long as it stays within the parameters of decency, it's all right."
"I've got a confession to make too," Sirius said finally.
They all looked at him, and he leaned back on his bed, his expression unusually somber. "I was just born, and had just met James. My parents and his parents were quite close and all that. We've grown up together of course, pranking and playing jokes on our friends and neighbors and the like." He looked at them all, quite seriously. "A week before we started at Hogwarts, Mr. Potter called me into his study. My parents were there, as was Mrs. P." He sighed heavily. "James, I'm sorry to tell you this, but.... They told me I'm a better prankster than you."
They all stared at Sirius for a long moment. Then James looked at Remus. "Anyway, we're glad you trust us enough to tell us. We solemnly swear that this will never leave the room."
Remus met his gaze. "Thank you," he said quietly.
James smiled faintly and glanced at Peter and Remus. "Now, you two wanna help me kill Sirius?"
Sirius rolled on his side, not liking the sudden grins on the threesome's faces.
And the three boys dove at him.
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