The next day….

Stephanie came downstairs for breakfast and was happily surprised to see Pam.

"Pammy" Stephanie said as she went to her.

"Steph, you look great. How are you" Pam asked as they hugged?

"Thank you. You look great too" Stephanie replied.

"How are you? Really" Pam asked concerned that she avoided the question?

"I am fine. I have my children. Kristen is home and…honestly, I am very, happy" Stephanie admitted.

Pam smiled at her as they sat down together.

"And Eric" Pam asked?

"He has been wonderful" Stephanie admitted.

Pam smiled happily.

Stephanie smile began to waver although she tried hard to keep up a brave face.

"Tell me. What is it" Pam asked?

"It is silly. Nothing you need or want to know about" Stephanie said suddenly feeling embarrassed and not wanting to discuss things after all.

"If it is something that is weighing on you then I want to help if I can" Pam replied supportive.

Stephanie looked around, realizing they were alone, she replied, "we have been arguing recently."

"About" Pam asked?

"About…well…that" Stephanie replied forcing herself to admit it out loud.

"I…oh…" Pam said when she figured it out by Stephanie face.

"Are you…" Stephanie asked?

"Yes…we are…." Pam admitted.

"Good. I am happy for you, Pammy" Stephanie replied honestly.

"You and Eric…" Pam asked?

"No…" Stephanie admitted.

"Since…." Pam pushed?

"The diagnosis. I just…I do not feel…I have no interest in it" Stephanie admitted.

"I am sure Eric understands" Pam replied.

"He feels rejected" Stephanie shared honestly.

"Oh…Steph…." Pam hugged her.

"How do I explain it to him so he can understand" Stephanie asked since she was truly at a loss?

"Tell him the truth. Whatever it is" Pam encouraged her.

"Eric does not handle the truth well" Stephanie reminded her.

Pam smiled and said, "Eric wants his wife…still…after all these years. I can only wish that we will be that way. You have 50 years. That says a lot about how Eric feels. I think if you explain he will understand."

"We were not together the whole time and I am not his wife anymore. Donna is" Stephanie reminded her.

"In his eyes, you are, and you always will be" Pam said certain.

"Yes…well…" Stephanie sighed. She knew her sister was right, but it made her feel even worse. She knew Eric loved her but…she also knew that their future would not be what they had always dreamed. To retire and travel the world just the two of them. He had been asking her to do that for a long time and she never agreed because of the family and the business, then Donna…and now this…again.

"Have you tried to get help for it" Pam asked?

"I have only spoken to Taylor…" Stephanie admitted.

"Maybe you should talk to someone else or there are all kinds of products and lingerie that can help" Pam suggested when she noticed Stephanie reaction. She knew her sister was private and would not talk to anyone else.

"I do not think that is something I want to try" Stephanie replied feeling more embarrassed.

"Steph…Eric is a designer for women. Maybe, he has something that you can wear that will…" Pam tried to suggest but Stephanie stopped her.

"No…I…" Stephanie stood up and began to pace.

"Steph…" Pam replied concerned by her sister reaction.

She sighed then admitted, "He gave me a gift before, a nightgown…I told him I did not want to wear it. We argued and he forced the truth from me. I told him he was right that I was avoiding him, avoiding being intimate and that he needed to accept that part of our lives was over. We almost parted ways."

"What" Pam asked shocked by all that has happened? She had no idea they were not doing well.

"I told him if there was someplace else, he would rather be…but he told me he wanted to be with me and that he loved me and our family. Ever since, he has been bringing up the issue and I told him that maybe if the moment is right it could happen, but I do not think that is going to ever happen. And now, Donna…I know she wants him back, but he is determined to divorce her and wants to marry me. But what kind of marriage will that be for him. I…I don't know what to do" Stephanie admitted as she placed her hand against her head.

Pam walked over to her and hugged her tight. She could see how much her sister was struggling with this.

That was what Eric saw when he walked in. He knew he walked in on something important. Not wanting to interrupt he walked toward his study quietly but hearing them made him stop.

"Oh Steph…have you considered that maybe you do not feel that way about him anymore" Pam asked concerned?

"I love him" Stephanie replied confused by what her sister meant.

"I know that but do you…want him…romantically" Pam asked?

Eric waited and listened, his heart pounding in anticipation of the answer. He knew it was wrong to listen in on their private conversation, but he needed to know.

Stephanie remained silent.

"Or has too much happened? I noticed a certain someone is back. Could this be about Massimo" Pam asked carefully?

Stephanie opened but then closed her mouth. She was truly speechless in the moment.

Eric felt his heart sink by her silence.

"Steph, do you want to be with Massimo" Pam asked deciding to take the risk by asking? It was not a secret that he had deep feelings for her.

Eric felt his fists tighten as he continued to listen, his heart racing. Did Stephanie want Massimo?

"Pam…Mass and I…we…are just friends" Stephanie said surprisingly not upset. The truth was if anyone knew how much she cared for Massimo it was Pam. They had all grown up together.

"Are you sure" Pam asked gently? She suspected there was more to it, but she would take her sister at her word.

"Yes, I'm sure" Stephanie replied.

Eric let go of the breath he was holding in.

"Then what is keeping you from wanting to be with Eric" Pam asked?

"I…I just…can't" Stephanie replied vaguely.

"Do you feel it physically when you are close" Pam continued to ask?

"Sometimes" Stephanie admitted.

"And other times" Pam asked?

"I…I have no interest in it" Stephanie admitted.

"Well…when you do have interest…what stops you" Pam asked?

"My health" Stephanie admitted honestly.

Realizing it was not rejection, although Stephanie had been telling him that all along, he always felt she was not being completely honest. But know he knew she was being honest. And it made him feel worse somehow. He had let her down and caused her more pain than necessary. He vowed to make it up to her. Determined he left them to talk and went into his study.

"I want you to consider wearing something when you are in the mood" Pam suggested.

Stephanie sighed.

"Try it. What can it hurt" Pam asked?

"I just…I think we are past that" Stephanie replied as she waved her hand at her sister.

"There is no such thing as being past romance" Pam teased her with a smile and a slight shove.

Stephanie smiled at her sister.

"Eric loves you and he wants to show you that in a physical way. You are the love of his life, you know. I hope you see that he wants to prove that to you. You've always told me Eric is an artist maybe this is the only way he knows how to show you" Pam said as she hugged her sister.

Stephanie closed her eyes thinking, that is what I do not want, not now, not anymore.

Late evening….

"Did you enjoy your visit with Pam" Eric asked as he joined her in bed?

"How did you know" Stephanie asked her heart beating fast? Did Eric overhear them, she wondered?

"I saw her" Eric admitted.

"You were home. Why did you not say something" Stephanie asked nervously?

"I did not want to interrupt" Eric said honestly.

They looked into each other eyes for a long moment and she knew that he knew, he overheard them.

"I am very happy that you have Pam to talk to and I hope that you enjoyed your visit" Eric replied deciding tonight was not the night to discuss anything.

"Thank you and yes…I did" Stephanie replied.

"Goodnight" Eric said with a kiss to her cheek and then he shut off his light and snuggled under the covers.

"Goodnight" Stephanie replied surprised that he did not want to talk about it. She shut her light off and snuggled under the covers as well.

The next day…

Eric thought about how he was going to prove to Stephanie that she could let her guard down with him. He wanted to show her how much he loved her without scaring her. He spent the day making plans for their evening and enlisted the help of the children as well. They all were happy about his idea. The only one that expressed concern was Thorne.

"Dad, are you sure this is a good idea" Thorne asked concerned?

"I want her to see how much I love her" Eric replied.

"Mother knows how much you love her" Thorne replied as he sat across from his father.

"Yes but, I want her to see it. I want to wine and dine her, dance with her, watch the stars together…" Eric explained.

"You want to romance her I know but, what if she takes it the wrong way" Thorne asked concerned?

"Then I will reassure her" Eric said wanting to ease his son worries.

"If you are sure" Thorne sighed.

"I am" Eric nodded his head.