Author's Notes: See chapter one for disclaimer and explanation.
Love, Life, and Death By Annie-chan Chapter Eight: DecisionsHikô awoke in darkness. At first, he thought he had not opened his eyes yet, but he soon found that they were as open as anybody's eyes were. He looked around, hoping to see something other than black, but nothing was in sight. He was lying on a smooth, marble-hard floor as black as the air around him. Something was not right.
He looked down at himself as he sat up. He was naked. His hair was loose and floated oddly in place whenever he turned his head, taking longer to change position. It moved like it would underwater. He could breathe fine, though, and he didn't feel like he was in water.
Water.
He suddenly remembered. He had kissed Kôran…Hôjun had seen…Kôran had rejected her devoted fiancé…it started to rain…a wild-looking Hôjun had tried to kill him…he had fallen to the hungry river…Hôjun had grabbed him, tried to pull him up…and then…and then…
He had let go. Hikô had drowned in the frigid river, horribly weakened by the thrashing waters. It had hurt. It had hurt him more than any injury he had gotten before.
Tears threatened. Hôjun hadn't lost his grip. He had purposely let go. Hikô was sure of it. Hôjun, why…why did you do it?!
He was dead now. Only a spirit. It explained his nudity, but where was he? This was nothing like what he expected. He had always expected either Heaven or Hell once he died, not some black void. Maybe this is Hell, he thought sullenly. Maybe I'm being punished with eternal solitude.
He heard a low chuckle behind him. He whirled around and saw a being such like he had never thought he would see in his life. The man was tall, with silver-white hair trailing down to the floor. His robes were the blackest black, nearly disappearing in the darkness that surrounded them both. His skin was nearly white, and the orangey-yellow eyes glowed faintly. This ghost-like being frightened him, and he felt a fierce desire to run away. But, all he could do was stand and face the being, feeling oddly like something beside himself was controlling his body.
"Da…dare da?!" he managed to squeak out, his fear growing by the minute.
"You need not know that for now," the man said, his deep voice seeming to penetrate Hikô's very soul. "We must address the matter at hand."
What matter? Hikô thought, starting to feel hysterical. "N-nani?" was all he could say.
"He betrayed you," the man replied. "He acted as your friend, and in the end, he betrayed and murdered you."
"N-no," the frightened boy gasped. "He…he didn't murder me!"
"He let you go."
"An…an accident. It was an accident! It must've been!"
"It was no accident. He wanted to kill you. You know that better than I."
"No!" The tears spilled over. "Hôjun…he couldn't have! He's my best friend!"
"Was your best friend," the man corrected. "He murdered you, Hikô. He murdered you, and he enjoyed it. He is your friend no longer."
"No…" Hikô dropped to his knees, burying his face in his hands. "Hôjun…" The mental attack was quickly breaking through his defenses.
"You loved her, didn't you? You loved her, and your friend got jealous."
"They…they belong together! I never should have interfered!"
"Really? Your friend never deserved her. Someone who kills out of jealousy never deserves love."
"No…no…"
"She should have been yours."
"Demo—"
"You love her, don't you?"
"Y-yes."
"Then why stand by and let someone else have something you desire that they themselves never should have received?"
"Demo, Kôran loves Hôjun as much as he loves her. She…she said she never loved me that way."
"Never mind that. I can help you. I can make it possible for you to take revenge on your murderer, and for you to make her yours forever."
"De-demo, Hôjun's my best friend! And Kôran—" He choked. "She doesn't love me like that!"
"Hôjun is not your friend. I already told you that. As for Kôran…" The man smiled in such a way that made every hair on Hikô's body stand on end. "You can make her love you. You can make her love you more than she ever loved Hôjun."
Hikô opened his mouth to reply, but stopped. Kôran loving him was something he wanted more than anything else in existence. Something in the back of his mind told him to fight back against the manipulation, but he ignored it. He looked up at the man.
"Really?" he asked in a small voice. The man smiled.
"Of course. And I can help you take revenge on the man who killed you. He is the only thing that stands between you and Kôran. You can eliminate him. You can have your revenge."
"Revenge…" the youth murmured quietly. "I can take her from him. What do I have to do?" He had a new fire burning in his eyes.
"You must pledge yourself to me. Serve me, and I will make everything I promised a reality. All it will take is a few years of training and a well-timed strike."
That something in the back of his mind was screaming at him to refuse, but he quickly smothered it out.
"Well? What is your answer? Will you join me or not?"
The aqua-haired young man grinned. "Yes."
The tall man lifted a hand and held it before him, his palm facing Hikô. "You will call me Tenkô-sama."
Hikô didn't have the chance to reply before he tumbled into unconsciousness.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Hôjun was lying on his back on the ground. He was warm, and it felt like some kind of light blanket had been draped over him. He could feel the sun filtering through something, like he was in a tent or a tarp was suspended above him. He moaned and turned his head to the side…
Pain exploded in and around his eye as the left side of his face hit the ground. He cried out sharply and tried to raise his hands to his face. Only his right arm would move, though. Memories were rushing back. The rain…attacking Hikô…the log racing toward him…
Panicking, he tried to open his eyes, finding with dismay that only the right would open.
A shape bent over him, touching his cheek, trying to calm him down.
"Shhhhhhhh. Don't jerk around so much, Hôjun-kun. You'll hurt yourself even more."
The soft, sweet lilt registered in his ears. "Kôran!"
"Hai," she replied. "I'm here."
"What…what happened?! Where are we?!"
She flinched slightly. "We are in a tent on a hill outside of Shôryû," she said softly. Pain was taking over her beautiful visage.
"Nani?" he said, confused. He tried to sit up, but she gently pushed him back down.
"You have been out for nearly a week, Hôjun," she said, looking away from him. "You drifted between conscious and unconscious off and on the whole time. I was wondering if you would ever fully wake up."
"Where…where is everyone?" he asked, a feeling of dread seeping through him.
"The…the dam broke," she whispered, trying not to choke on her emotion. "Our town was destroyed. Nothing is left. Only a waterlogged valley and the ruins of some of the buildings."
He couldn't speak. It couldn't be! It just couldn't!
"Everyone who survived is on this hill in tents that someone had the sense to grab," Kôran continued. "We don't have enough, so some of the stronger men have fashioned tree branch shelters and are staying in those. It hasn't rained since the flood, anyway. We are all trying to figure a way to rebuild." Her face twisted in pain. "We are not many. Only a handful of us survived the flood. I wouldn't be here if I hadn't been washed near land and someone hadn't caught my hand and dragged me out. Two men looking for survivors found you by the riverside and brought you back here. You have a broken arm, four broken ribs, and your left eye is gone. I've managed to bandage you up as best I can." She looked directly at him, a forlorn look in her eyes. "I am the only survivor in my family. And, Hôjun, I'm sorry, but Hanabira is the only one besides you to survive in your family."
Hôjun stared at her in shock. Kâsan…Tôsan…Niisan…all dead?! How? How could that happen?! She continued brokenly.
"Hikô is not here either. He must be dead, too." She turned away and wrapped her arms around her knees, crying softly. "I am thankful I still have you. D-demo…we…"
"Kôran," he interrupted her. He didn't want to say what he knew he must say next. "I killed him."
She stopped crying and turned slowly back to him. He was sitting up and looking at her with an expression that held unlimited sorrow. "Nani?" she asked, disbelieving.
"I killed him," he repeated. "I was furious with him for stealing you. I tried to stab him, but he knocked the knife away. I shoved him into the river, then. He cried for my help. I…I tried to save him…but I let go. I let go and let him drown." He lowered his head. "I killed him…I killed him…"
She stared at him, refusing to believe that this man before her had killed their best friend. Ri Hôjun was no murderer! He couldn't be! She longed to embrace him, comfort him, assure him that everything was going to be all right, but she didn't have the right to hold him like that anymore. Instead, she reached out and gingerly touched the large bandage sweeping across the left side of his face, careful not to hurt the horrendous wound underneath. "Hôjun…how did you get this?"
He looked up, not expecting that question to be next. "I was holding onto Hikô's hand, and a log came by and hit me in the face," he answered truthfully.
"And you let go of Hikô, then?" she pushed on.
"H-hai," he answered, not knowing where this conversation was going.
"Then, it was an accident. You could never have held on to Hikô. Your letting go was just a reflex. Nothing could have changed that."
Part of him wanted desperately to believe her, but the other part of him knew better. Not pushing him into the river would have made all the difference. He was still at fault. "No, Kôran. It's my fault. It's all my fault. If I hadn't pushed him into the river in the first place…" He averted his eye. "I let the man you love drown," he whispered, barely audible.
Kôran was stunned. He thought she loved Hikô?! No! She loved Hôjun! She never loved Hikô! "Hôjun, I love you!"
He looked up at her, his eye unbelieving. "Demo…I saw you two kissing! Soshite…you…you rejected me…you wouldn't marry me. I…I…"
She stopped him, her voice pained. "Hôjun, I rejected you, because I don't deserve you anymore. I betrayed you. I thought you hated me for it. And even if you don't hate me, I still don't deserve your love." She turned away again, tears sliding down her perfectly formed cheeks.
He sat there staring at her quivering shoulders. She had it backwards! Despite his injuries, he gripped her shoulder, turned her around, and held her tightly to him, ignoring the pain in his ribs as he pressed her to his chest.
"Kôran, no!" he half sobbed. "If anyone is not deserving of the other's love, it is I! I betrayed you both! You have done nothing wrong, and now Hikô is dead for no reason! All because of me! I don't care what you say…I still hold myself at fault! I can only beg for your forgiveness!"
She was motionless. He still loved her! It was all a huge mistake! She didn't feel any more worthy of his love, though. He continued, tears flowing down the right side of his face.
"I understand if you don't want me anymore…demo…I'm begging you to let me stay with you! Please don't leave me alone like this! I…I need someone to love me, to keep me sane! Otherwise—" He stopped, unwilling to say what might happen if she left him alone. Suicide, insanity…perhaps something even worse.
She looked up, hope dawning in her eyes. However, she seemed reluctant to believe he still wanted her. "Hôjun, I—"
He silenced her with a kiss. He poured all his love and passion for her into that simple touch, showing her exactly how much he desired her. He released her after an endless moment, and gazed lovingly into her eyes. "Kôran," he whispered, "marry me."
She couldn't speak. All she could do was wind her arms around him and hold him gently, mindful of his injuries.
Relief flooded through him as he rightly interpreted her actions. She would still marry him! He would have at least one solace in this suddenly cruel world.
As she felt him drifting off to sleep, she slowly lowered him back down to the makeshift bed, lay down beside him, wrapped her arms lightly around his waist, and had the first good sleep since more than a week ago.
To be continued…Author's Notes: HA!!!!!!!! I didn't make Kôran die in my story! That's my glaring difference I said I'd have in here way back in the first chapter's Author's Notes! After all, it's a semi-alternate universe, so I had to have something different! Who's glad I decided to give my Chichiri-chan a break in his otherwise tragic life? I certainly am! ^_^ Excuse me if I sound a little hyper. I took my SAT yesterday morning, and I still haven't shaken all the anxiety I experienced. Anyway, send anything you have to say to mangareader@hotmail.com, onegai shimasu!