Mush is sitting in a booth at Tibbys when our handy dandy Kidnappers Muffins Blush and Bug Run in throw a burlap sack over his head Pick him up and hurry back out to the waiting carriage Before they could throw mush in two girls jump out and try to pry the struggling mush away From Blush and Bugs grasp.
Muffins looks over at the girls. "Blackrose , Mo-Town! Stop that! we have to kidnap him or we aren't going to get paid!"
Blackrose pulls harder on one of Mush's legs. "Never! We must save mush!"
Mo-town Pulled on mush's other leg. "Its our jobs as mush fans to protect him if he is in trouble! You will only get him over our dead bodies."
Muffins just shrugged and pulled out a tranquilizer gun from the back of the carriage. "Will unconscious do?" with that Muffins raised the gun and shot Blackrose and Mo-town. With the two girls now unconscious the kidnapper go about with the rest of the kidnapping.
*TV turns off*
Gears- *Turns around* well as you saw Mush was kidnapped yesterday right out of Tibbies. I must give the kidnappers kudos for that most excellent Kidnapping you girls certainly went above and beyond your kidnapping duties! Now on to business. Why don't we meet today's contestants.
((we see three girls standing behind a metal table.))
Gears- From left to right we have Firecracker, Hades and Tuffy. Now why don't we bring out the victim.
(Mush is led out to an electric chair and strapped in.)
Gears- Worry not people the electric chair isn't hooked up or anything we don't want anymore Mush fans Breathing down our necks today. Well stick around cause coming up after the break is round one of our game. So don't change that channel.
(camera come back and show gears standing at the podium)
Gears- (gears smiles and shuffles her cards.) Alright ladies this is how its gunna work in round one. I'm going to ask you ten questions for every question you get right you will receive 2 points for every question you get wrong you will get one point deducted from your score. You will need to get oh say 12 points in order to win a key and save Mush from torture. Do you understand?
(the girls nod or murmer yes and Gears smiles as she looks at one of her cards)
Gears- alright ladies last night while….um…'interrogating' Mush we found out that he loved Muffins…..(Muffins jumps up and smiles) No not Muffins the kidnapper! Muffins the food! (Muffins murmurs something about Gears lying so the Mush fans wont kill her and sits back down) Like I said we found Mush likes muffins the food! So we gave him fifty blueberry muffins and gave him an hour. How many muffins do you think Mush ate? (Muffins giggles like a five year old. Gears looks at her and frowns) Muffins! Get your mind out of the gutter!!! Like I said….Um did he eat : a)30 b)40 or c) all fifty.
(The three girls huddle up and talk amongst themselves or rather argue quietly amongst themselves.)
Tuffy- We think its all fifty.
Gears (looks at her cards for a minute) you are….right…..2 points for you. Ok now last night while um 'interrogating' mush we found out he is afraid of lacey pink panties. So we put mush here in a phone booth and started dropping in lacey pink panties. How long did mush stay In there before he freaked out and force the door open in order to escape?
(Tuffy, hades and firecracker look at gears like she's nuts.)
Gears- was it a) 2 minutes b) thirty seconds or c) 5 minutes?
(the girls all look at each other confused)
Firecracker- (shrugs) um 2 minutes.
Gears- eh I'm sorry it was thirty seconds. One point will be deducted from your score.
(one point is deducted from their score. Leaving them one point.)
Ok last night we gave mush a purple crayon and a sheet of paper and asked which one of you is more likely to beat up a DeLancy brother? Who did he draw?
a) Firecracker b) Hades c) Tuffy or d) all three of you.
Hades- all three of us!!
Gears- (turns around to view the TV. It turns on and shows three stick figures with the names of the girls written above them. Gears turns around) Looks like you are right that's two points ( two points are added to their score giving them 3 points.) Last night mush told us that he used to be afraid of Les. Why did mush say he was afraid of les.
Was it a) He has beady little eyes that would creep anyone out. B) He's really 16 and is just freakishly small for someone his age. C) He's been heard chanting in dead languages while waving dead chickens around. Or D) all of the above.
(all the girls stare at gears then at mush with eyes the size of gongs)
All Of the girls- ummm……((*Looks at each other*)) um…..D?
Gears- (Looks at her card)…yup D. Man that boy need some serious help.. That gives you 5 points. Now next question…We …wait a minute…(double checks the card) Ok um well last night we found out through a chat that Mush was a princess… so we decided to dress him er her like one.. (Looks to Muffins Bug and Blush and shakes her head at the oh so innocent smiles they are giving her) They made him try on three dresses that they Um borrowed from Medda…..we have video but Im not sure it would be humane to show it so heres the question what color did our Kidnappers agree looked best on Mush? A) hot pink…..B) lime green or C…(cringes) electric yellow…
Hades- Um ((Looks at Blush Muffins and Bug)) Um well we think that the answer would be electric yellow……..
Gears- Id go to video but well I just want to be able to sleep tonight so kidnappers is she right?
((Blush Nods vigorously))
((Shrugs)) well that gives you seven points.. Um well….on to the next question.. yes next question.. Now we know that Mush is a very good dancer. So we put on some music and started a clock and had him dance till he dropped. How long did he dance? A) 2 hours? B)5 hours? Or C) 9 hours?
Firecracker- Oh I know this one. (winks at mush) That would be five hours.
Gears- I don't even wanna know how you know. But your right……you ladies have 9 points now and four questions left. So ahem We found out last night that Mush Developed a fear of our kidnappers (Glares at Muffins Blush and bug) So we decided to see how long he could stay in a room with them before clawing his way through the wall to get away. To be fair we had the kidnappers sitting down and not touching or talking to him….How long did it take before he was trying to get out of their mere presence? A) 15 seconds. B)2 minutes or C)30 minutes.
Tuffy- Um well we would like to belive he was pretty brave so we are going to say C 30 minutes..
Gears- eeeee no sorry…..it was a whole 15 seconds..with one point gone from your score that leaves you 8 points Since His Nickname is Mush we thought it might be fun to see how many bowls of Mush he could eat. Was it a) 20 B) 30 or C)35?
Firecracker- (confers with the group) Um since you took him from Tibby we are going to say 20.
Gears- Alright…Fair deduction and your right he only ate 20 bowls of our tasteless mush. You have brought your score up to ten points. Now We found out that Mush has quiet an obsession with shoes…We don't know why but he does…so we decided quiz him on many different kinds of shoes as well as who makes them as well as who amongst the newsies wear them… out of 15 questions how many did the boy get right?
a) all of them b)14 c)10?
Hades-ummmm (Looks at the others who merely shrug) a..
Gears- (nods) Yup apparently the boy is horribly freakishly obsessed with shoes! He got all the questions right.. that boots your score up to 12. Now for the last question…Last night….we discovered Mush's Love for peanuts so we put a peanut in the middle of the room and put an elephant on one side and Mush on the other and had them duke it out for the peanut. Which one won…Mush or the elephant….(raises and eyebrow.) Blush was this your idea!
(Blush giggles)
Should have known. So who won mush or the elephant?
Tuffy- Well he's still in one piece so…….yeah he mush have lost.
Gears-( Nods) Yeah fortunately for you mush knows better than to take on an elephant 5 million times his own body weight…..that brings your points to 14. We have now reached 'the screw your friends' Portion of this round Last night we offered Mush a Vacation on a tropical island away from everyone for three whole weeks. But if he took it he would cause the team to lose 2 points from their score. So did he take it?
(the girls huddle)
Hades- Um….no..
Gears (turns to the TV that show mush in the room)
Mush on Tv- I turned it down cause I don't know how its gunna go up there and I don't want to be tortured by them (Looks around paranoid for Muffins Blush and Bug) (Tv turms off)
Gears- (turns around) Well he didn't take it…that leaves you ladies with 16 points and you are able to get a key. Which would you like 1,2,or3?
All of the girls- 3!
Gears-( goes and puts key number three on the table in front of the girls) Well You have saved Mush from torture…….this round…coming up next is round two so don't go away.
(Cuts to commercials)
(Camera cuts back to the set)
Gears- Hello and welcome back to Kidnapped Newsie style. We are now in round two. In this round we will put sixty seconds on the clocks in that time we will give Mush a category. He must choose a contestant to answer the question from that category. You must have 10 points to get a key in this round.
(the clock is set for 60 seconds and mush's electric chair is turned to face the direction of the contestants.)
Gears- Are you ready Mush?
(Mush Nods and the clock starts)
Gears- Music
Mush- Hades
Gears- Name one of the artists that sang 'Walking in Memphis'
Hades- Um…..Cher?
Gears- your right.
(2 points are put on the board)
Gears- Places
Mush- Tuffy
Gears- The capitol of atlanitis?
Tuffy- what?!
Gears I'm sorry thats the wrong answer
(1 point is deducted leaving them with one point)
Gears- great rumors
Mush- Firecracker.
Gears- name one popular rumor involving David.
Firecracker- He and Denton are involved…in a less than wholesome way.
(two points is added giving them three points.)
Gears- (*looks at the clock has thirty seconds left on the clock*) history
Mush- tuffy
Gears- Which presedent was assassinated at Fords theater?
Tuffy- Lincoln
(2 points add to the score making it 4 points)
Gears- mythology
Mush- Hades
Gears- name the Greek god of the underworld.
Hades- Hades…..wow that sounds weird…
(2 points are added on to make it 6 points)
Gears- science……(buzzer rings) Oh Im sorry that's the end of round two and Im afraid you didn't get 10 points and you all know what that means….
((down in the mini arena Blush and Muffins unstrap mush from the safety of his electric chair and drag him over to a giant square box type thing with a blanket thrown over it.))
Gears- Now Mush as stated earlier hes well hes (giggles) hes afraid of les…..so we didn't feed les for of 12 hours put him in a big glass booth and are now going to leave mush in there with him for five minutes while we go to commercial. Ladies
((bug pulls the blankets off the glass booth and Blush and Muffins toss mush in quickly closing the door))
Mush- (screams and pounds on the glass))
Les- (Jumps around Pulling on mush's shirt and searching his pockets for food))
Gears- ((watches as Mush suffers)) alright don't change that channel and don't go away cause we'll be right back with more Kidnapped newsies style.
((cuts back from commercials…mush is sitting once more in his electric chair))
Gears ((smiles)) well we're back for round three, round three is simple we are going to chose one of you to be tortured. If you go through with the torture you get a key…If not then your screwed and so is mush. Ladies?
((Muffins and bug takes mush over to a big wheel and strap him on…..Blush walks up the most evile grin and gives the wheel a spin))
Gears- (waits for mush to stop spinning)
Mush- (2 minutes later… Mush stops helmet pointer pointing to Tuffy's name)
Gears- Tuffy! Congratulations! Your today's lucky victim! Do you want to precede?
Tuffy- (looks at mush and then at Hades and Firecracker and gulps) um….sure..
Gears- alright then come on over! (watches as Tuffy comes and stands by her podium) Today your goinf to kiss someone.
Tuffy- that's torture?
Gears- you didn't wait to let me tell you who you would be kissing. (turns around and waves some one over) Oscar! Oh Oscar! Get over here.
Oscar- (stands in from of Tuffy grinning like a maniac. His breath is horrible))
Gears- now oscar hasn't brushed his teeth in…….three weeks. Enjoy!
Oscar- *grabs Tuffy and Frenches her*
(a minute and a half later. Tuffy pushes Oscar away and he disappears back stage.)
Gears- (feels bad for Tuffy and hands her a big bottle of mouthwash and disinfectant.) that it! The rooms over and you won a key..Tuffy……what key would you like? (waits until Tuffy finishes with the mouthwash)
Tuffy- 2...(swigs the mouthwash again)
(takes key 2 and 3 and gives them to muffins)
Gears- muffins here is gunna take the keys and see if one of them opens Mush's cell door. If the keys don't work your all in for one giant torture! If it does open the door however you all win a lovely trip to (checks her card) Um…….the Bermuda triangle……yes the Bermuda triangle!
Muffins- (slides key number two and confetti rains down and the dorr opens.) Darn it! (snaps her fingers)
Mush- (runs out and tackles all three girls) thank you! thank you! thank you!
Gears- well ladies and gentlemen tune in next time for another episode of newsies Kidnapped style.