Just Like Her

Chapter 2

That fateful day that little Jillian died marked the day that Heero died as well, as a person. After witnessing her death right before his eyes, it wasn't until they lowered her casket in her ground that Heero realized he would never see his sister again. The bubbly laughter that once filled the Yuy household with joy had quickly dissipated in to the confines of the silent walls. During the first years after the accident, the pain of Jillian's death was too much for Heero's parents to handle. For the longest time, Mrs. Yuy could not even go into Jillian's bedroom, the slightest thought of her would cause her to become depressed and heart broken. Heero never even stepped foot in her room after that day, just looking at her closed door was hard enough. They never did have any children after Jillian, thus leaving Heero alone during the hardest time of his life.

Eventually time had healed the grief stricken parents but Heero still remained frozen in time, his demeanor never changing since his sister's death. He became stoic and the sparkle that once shined in his eyes had disappeared, leaving nothing but an impassive, empty look in his eyes. He was in school now but that didn't seem to help him. He chose to be a recluse, shutting himself out from the other children and teachers and always keeping to himself when he was around others. He would rarely talked to anyone, not even to his own parents. If he did talk, they were short, unemotional words that when put together, never really meant anything in the first place. The once talkative and fun-loving boy had made himself invisible to the world.

The Yuy's knew how traumatized Heero was by his sister's death and they did everything in their power to try and help their son, but all was done in vain. They tried to talk to him about it but they were always left with no response. Normal conversation was hard to establish with Heero because he said so little. Even a simple, "How was your day?" was too much for him to answer. It came to the point where the Yuy's didn't even know their own son, their only son. Their hearts ached whenever they saw Heero. He refused to open up his heart to anyone, it was as if when Jillian died, she took the key to his heart along with her.

Ever since that day, all he's wanted to do was get away from that house, get away from any memories that he might have had there with Jillian. He tried his hardest to forget her, but even more memories were brought to mind. In his room, the hat that he had given her laid on the top shelf of his closet, collecting dust as it was untouched since that day. Stowed away in Heero's nightstand, tokens from the two most treasured memories he had of his sister. The picture of them curled up next to under the Christmas tree amongst all of the paper, that was Jillian's and his first Christmas together. The other item was almost too painful to even look at. It was the picture she had drawn Heero for his fifth birthday, only weeks before that fateful day. Whenever Heero was in his room, he thought that by closing his eyes, he could make everything go away.

Heero went on like that for years, even as a teenager he chose to remain that way. His mother never ceased trying to talk to him, in hopes that if she said enough, something was bound to be said back. It came to the point where she didn't care whether it was a negative or positive response, any response was good enough for her. She couldn't stand to see her son like this any longer, if push came to shove, she was going to talk to him.

When Heero entered high school, things started to become a lot harder. His elementary years were much easier since the kids at that age thought he was strange and didn't bother to talk to him. That was easy. Now he is going to be at the place where being anti-social was going to make his life a living hell. There was always something to talk about in high school, rather about someone than anything else. And at that age, kids tend to be more cruel and relentless when it came to others feelings. Heero knew it wouldn't be hard to ignore everything, he had been doing that for most of his life. The question in his mind was how much could he actually take?

For the first few years of high school, everyone pretty much left him alone, tending to their own personal lives and shallow realities. But then of course you have those obnoxious people that can never seem to keep their mouth shut regardless of anyone's personal feelings. They always seemed to stir up trouble whenever they opened their mouths. In one of Heero's classes, he had the luxury of sitting near one of those people. Usually he ignored this person, concluding that whenever he spoke it was due to his lack of stupidity rather than his need to talk. One day however he could not ignore it. In the middle of a lecture, Heero heard whispering emanating from behind him and for some reason, their conversation caught his interest.

"You're kidding? That guy never talks?" one guy remarked.

"No joke," another replied.

"Man, what a dork! Did he have his tongue cut out or what?" he snickered.

"No man, he's been that way for as long as I can remember. I don't even recall him having any friends," the guy's friend responded.

"What a loser," he said as he glared at him.

"I heard when he was little, his little sister died in a car accident and he saw it all," the one guy informed his friend.

"Oh really? What's his name?" he replied as a smug grin crossed his face.

"His name is Heero," his friend told him.

"Bet you I can make him say something," he boasted.

"What the hell are you going to do?" the boy he was talking to asked. He had a bad feeling about what his friend was going to do.

"Just watch. Hey Heero," he whispered in Heero's direction.

Heero peered at him from the corner of his eye and gave him a look that said to leave him alone. No such chance. "Hey Heero, I heard you killed your sister," the guy spat out.

The pencil that was in Heero's hand broke in two as he snapped it in one swift blow. "What did you say?" he muttered, keeping his eyes directed forward.

"You heard me. I know you killed your sister."

That was the last straw. The once invisible Heero made himself known to the whole school at that very moment. Before the guy knew what was coming, Heero stood up and laid that guy out on the floor, desk and all, with one hard punch to the guy's jaw. With all eyes turned to Heero and the boy on the floor, Heero picked up the guy by the collar of his shirt and hissed, "If you say one thing about my sister, you're going to be eating threw a straw for the rest of your life."

With those words, he threw the guy back on the ground with a hard thud. When Heero looked up, all eyes were on him, no one was expecting that reaction out of him. After cooling down a bit, he calmly sat back down in his seat without another word said and gave his full attention back to the teacher. The teacher on the other hand, found out what happened by another student and sent the beaten up bully to the principal's office. Class resumed once more but no one could shake off what had just occurred. From that moment on, Heero was no longer the guy who stood in the shadows, he had made himself known with mere actions and only a few words. No one chose to mess with him after that day, and in a way, he had earned their respect, a reason to his silent ways.

It was after that day however, that made Heero's life all the more unbearable. No one realized the true power of what that guy had said. Up to that day, he was finally able to repress all of the memories he had of his sister, but the mere mentioning of Jillian's death started to give Heero reoccurring nightmares of that dreaded day. The event repeated in his head over and over again like a broken record, a constant reminder of that day. From the screeching tires to the moment his sister laid lifeless on the street, fate was determined to not let him forget. Heero knew at that point that he had to get away from that place, get away from the face of the little honey haired cherub that haunted him day in and day out, he just couldn't escape her.

With graduation only a year away, the talk of college arose and Heero saw that as his chance to get away from it all, to get away from her. Heero had decided to go to a school over seas in a country in Europe. By doing that, he hoped he would be able to start over with his life. After telling his parents of his decision, they were happy yet sadden by it. He was all that they had left but for the simple reason that Heero was still haunted by Jillian's death, they concluded that it would be best for him if he did get away.

The days of his senior year seemed to lag on, slowing pulling him along with painful memories still lingering in his mind. After long months of enduring extreme emotional distress, graduation had come and was only two days away. Heero had planned on leaving for school the day of graduation, as soon as he possibly could. On the eve of his graduation, Heero had walked up stairs to his room but instead, the sight of Jillian's closed door changed his mind. Ever since the day she died, he has not set foot in her room, he didn't want to be reminded of her. But for some reason, he had to go in to her room, like he was compelled to do so.

He slowly turned the knob and pushed open the door, the sheer innocence of the room sent an eerie sensation throughout his body. Her room was stuck in a time warp, taking him back to the days of his childhood. Heero closed the door behind him and took in the room that once belonged to his sister. Her tiny bed, all of her toys resting on the shelves and her baby blanket folded neatly on the bed. All of it was still fresh in his mind. He sat down in the middle of her room and closed his eyes. 'You were just a child Jillian, pure and innocent. I still have yet to figure out why it was you God had decided to take away that day. I'm sorry Jillian, I have been trying to forget you, this house, and all of the memories that we have shared. The pain in my heart is still lingering within and the thought of you just makes it hurt even more. Please forgive me Jillian,' Heero prayed quietly as silent tears began to fall down his cheeks.

Watching in the shadows was Heero's mom. She was looking for him and even though Jillian's room was the last place he could be, she looked any ways. Mrs. Yuy had tears in her eyes as she watched her son cry for the first time since his sister's passing. Without saying a word, she left him be and quietly shut the door behind her.

That night, Heero laid in bed immersed in deep thought. Tomorrow he would be leaving for college to pursue a higher degree of learning, but that wasn't the real reason for his going away. He had to get away to a place that would allow him to forget, that would allow him to start over with his life. Heero fell asleep knowing that this would be the last time he would ever sleep in that bed for a long time.

Morning rolled around and Heero had just finished packing for school. He put on his graduation gown and slung his bag over his shoulder. As he walked down the stairs with his duffel back in hand, he took one last look at his bedroom door and then at Jillian's. 'Goodbye Jillian.'

"Well Heero, this is the big day, are you ready?" Mr. Yuy said as his son came down the stairs.

"Yeah," was all Heero had to say.

"You go on ahead, your mom and I will be there later."

Heero nodded in acknowledgment and walked out the door. Before getting in to his car, he turned around and took one good look at his house. After taking a long look, Heero threw his bag in the back seat of the car and drove off to the high school.

The graduation ceremony meant the starting of a new life for most, but it meant more to Heero. It meant closing the final chapter in his old life and preparing to write a new one. After some lengthy and tearful good-byes from his parents, Heero headed to the airport to catch his flight. Heero had thought that it would be harder to say goodbye to his parents, but oddly enough, it didn't. It felt as if there was a driving force behind all of this, as if something were telling him to go, that it everything would be all right.

As Heero boarded the plane, he realized that this would be his last chance to back out of this, that this would be the moment his life would change forever. He closed his eyes and breathed in deeply as he set his foot in the plane, a new chapter to his life was just around the corner waiting to be written.