Notes: WARNING! Slashy yaoi homosexual content stuffs here! That and demon
+ woman things. If it offends you, go away. It's not my fault if you read
it and get grossed out. That and strong language. This has words only for
the people who are not offended by mere sounds.
Constructive criticism in reviews is welcomed and noted: stupid flames are not. Please don't expect any Shakespeare, Nivin or Wells here; this is a fanfiction site and all the stories are amateur. So I'm sorry if I'm not a best-seller novelist. Just don't flame me.
For those of you who don't know, an elasti-plast is a Band-Aid. It's an English thing. They're both brand names. I honestly don't know why it's called a plaster though.
Oh yes, and I have NO idea how to spell elasti-plast.
And I don't own elasti-plast OR Band-Aid.
This chapter kinda re-writes the whole Bai Tsa thing. All well. Lots of things in this story screw with the real story line.
Blood is Thicker Than Water- Bai Tsa is Both and Shendu Still Doesn't Like Her
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Valmont jumped between the demon and Jackie, blindly trying to protect the injured man. He landed a kick on the scaly side of Shendu, knocking him aside. The demon landed hard, sprawled out, and skidded across the floor and into the sales counter. Valmont was surprised; for his size, Shendu was light.
Behind the demon, three enforcers got up and ran out the front door. The mountain of a man he was fighting with tossed Hak Foo, making his body make an unpleasant sound as it hit against the floor. Shendu stood back up, eyes glowing a flaming red. He shot daggers at Valmont for the attack.
Next thing the man knew, a burst of flame was coming for him. He dodged to the left, getting a singed pant leg, but surviving. Another blast came from the demon's direction and Valmont was barely able to avoid being burnt to a crisp.
Shendu prepared a third attack on Valmont when he was caught up in a bear hug from behind, all the air leaving his lungs. He was lifted off the ground, sputtering, by Tohru. He struggled and clawed, trying to break free, but was held tightly. Suddenly, his minion warriors, the shadowkhan, surrounded the room. Shendu laughed resoundingly. Tohru, not amused, squeezed as tight as he could, causing the laugh to taper into a squeak.
The shadowkhan circled Tohru, then, their capes held out to block view, swarmed onto him. A voice came from behind the black wall, "I WILL get you CHAN!!!" Shendu screamed. The black ninjas fell back and disappeared into the ground, leaving Tohru, but no Shendu, behind.
For a moment, the shop was very quiet as they all looked on at the chaotic scene left behind.
Valmont stood still in the middle of the room. Nearby, Tohru and Uncle did the same. Jackie sat on the floor; his leg bloody and mangled. Valmont turned and went to his side, kneeling on one knee. "Are you all right??" He asked. Jackie winced, "Not really. My leg's practically been torn off, for one thing." The one leg of the khaki's were tattered and soaked in blood. Valmont rolled them up and examined the leg. Several huge tears, crescent moon shaped, ran all over his lower leg. They were deep; deep enough to see the gray meat under the skin. He was bleeding profusely. "We have to stop the bleeding. We're going to need a VERY big elasti-plast." Valmont said. He turned to the old chi wizard. "Bandages?"
Jade burst through the shop front door. "JACKIEEE!!!!" She yelled. "Oh my god, are you okay?!?! Is your leg okay?!?!" She said, keeping her distance from the blood. "Jade! I'll be fine." Jackie said. Excitable Jade jumped up and down where she stood. "How did Shendu get a body!?" Jade asked, "And why's he here?" She shoved a thumb in Valmont's direction.
"Valmont came here so Uncle could cast a spell and free him of Shendu. I don't know the answer to the other one." Valmont thought about answering that for him, but decided against it. No one seemed to like it when he talked, no matter WHAT was coming out.
Uncle bandaged Jackie's leg with minimal remarks about his nice shop floor being stained: a veritable bloodbath. When asked if he could stand, he said he didn't know. Valmont on one side, Uncle on the other, they helped him up. Jackie felt light headed from blood loss, and standing up didn't help it. He tried to put weight on the leg but immediately recoiled in pain. The muscle was too badly damaged: trying to stand on it would only make things worse.
Jade wasn't making things any more pleasant. As they loaded the injured man carefully into the back seat of his green car*, she was constantly chattering about how awful the situation was, "Oh my god, oh my god! They're probably going to AMPUTATE it!! That's SO gross! Not that THAT isn't gross there," -she pointed at his leg- "Then you'll never do kung fu again and I'll only have three fourths of an uncle!!!" "Jade, that's crazy." Jackie said, "My leg's going to be just fine. They're not going to have to," -pause to avoid gagging at the thought- "Amputate it."
Jade leaned into the car, "What if you get some awful infection? I learned in school about this nasty decease that makes your skin get all puffy and red, and slimy stuff oozes from it and-" Jackie gritted his teeth and tried not to throw up.
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Shendu stood glaring at the four humans. Bits of what had been a white sofa and a crate of who-knows-what fish product sat smoldering in one corner of the room. A pile of scared enforcers stood in the other (once again attempting an invisibility act and failing) staring at the smoldering bits.
"Uh, nevermind?" Finn said. Chow stepped forward and smiled really, really big, "Uh, yeah! What we MEANT was, we'd LOVE to keep helping you out with the demon portals and stuff." Ratso nodded. "Uh huh" "I'm glad you decided that." Shendu said. He turned his back on them, letting them leave the room with their hides. In the hall, Shendu's keen hearing picked up, "You're an idiot!" "I whole heartedly agree." He mumbled to himself.
"SHENDU!" The demon tossed his head around in surprise at his sister's voice. The image of the blue demon sorceress appeared on the large, full-body mirror behind him. Shendu's mighty demeanor with the humans was suddenly pushed aside for the sniveling, suck up one he reserved for his siblings. "Sister Bai! Ah, nice to see you. Doing well I trust?"
"Cut it, Shendu!" Bai Tsa snapped at him. "What are you doing out of the human host??"
"I, uh, well you see….."
"Nevermind. We'll discuss THAT later. Now, I have been waiting here for my portal to open, and oddly enough, it hasn't! Why is that Shendu? Am I took think that PERHAPS Chan's demise is not completed?"
"Aahhhlllmost is. Came just this close-"
"HE'S NOT DEAD?!"
"Not quite!"
"He either is or he is not. From what you say, it seems he is most decidedly NOT. Shendu, I grow increasingly impatient with you!"
Shendu shifted his weight nervously and held out a hand in apology, "Ah, Sister, I have OF COURSE been doing all I can to remove Jackie Chan and proceed to release you. It is but a MINOR delay, I assure you!"
"Shendu, no more little side quests! I want out of here NOW! You got that?"
"Ahh, yes, Sister Bai! I was just about to-"
"I had better be out of this realm and into that one before the end of the week or you will live to regret it!" and with that, she disappeared, leaving only Shendu's reflection for him to look at. Shendu muttered an insult in Chinese under his breath.
Screw killing Jackie Chan for now. He'd go ahead and just open the portal. Now that he wasn't stuck to Valmont, he had no reason to want the success of his siblings. Who cares if Bai Tsa got sucked back in? He never liked her anyway.
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"You look better." Jade said. "I should hope so." Jackie pointed out. Just about anything looked better than his leg with it's fresh wounds and blood everywhere. He leaned on his crutch and headed upstairs. "You done your homework?" "Ahh, not yet." "Do that now, please." He said politely. Jade groaned but obeyed him and retrieved her assignment from her backpack.
Jackie assailed the stairs shakily, weight never touching his left leg. At the top, he chose the room Valmont was in to enter. "Knock knock?" He said. Valmont looked up from a book he was reading. Some law fiction Jackie would have found insanely boring. "Oh, hello. Come in." He said, putting the book down. Jackie plopped himself on the bed. (The same one they had soiled with their coitus a couple days ago)
"Your leg doing okay?" Valmont asked him. Jackie nodded, "It's not giving too much trouble. Then again, I've been better….." Valmont got up from the chair he was in to sit down next to Jackie. "I'm quite sure you have."
He was released from the hospital with white bandages surrounding his lower left leg the morning after it had happened. He had lost a lot of blood, but fortunately not enough for it to be too big a problem. He just couldn't give blood for a while. The thought of a transfusion reminded him too much of events not far in the past.
The nurse had been quite impressed with the size of damage the 'wolf' had done to him. Well, he couldn't exactly tell them a dragon-demon tried to rip his leg off, could he? It was still tender to stand on, so he avoided walking whenever he could. He was going to be staying at Uncle's (Section 13 seemed too much of a trial for him, especially getting in and out.) and so, Jade was too. With all five people there, it was a little cramped. Jackie shared Tohru's room while Jade got to sleep on a couch. This was chosen as preferable to Uncle's room and smelling garlic all night. Valmont was stuffed, alone, in the room he had been discovered in.
Jackie leaned his head against Valmont's chest. He was mentally taxed for the day and was just seeking a little unconditional comfort. The crime lord hugged him up close, "Everything alright?" Jackie sighed. "Yeah. Things are just a little….." "Yeah." Valmont kissed his head. Jackie looked up and kissed him on the lips.
Captain Black had been concerned. Jackie had been missing from his mind for a couple days, and then he had shown up with half his leg practically torn off. Jackie had, of course (because he's Jackie), explained everything. Black had been quite a bit pissed when the story was over, both at Jackie for keeping the kidnaps a secret and at his friend's near death.
Jackie knew just how Black felt. He remembered when Black had almost been killed by the dragon talisman. Funny, he wasn't so pissed at Valmont for that anymore. Maybe he should be. It was a little conflicting to have a best friend and a lover who are mortal enemies. What would Gus say if he ever found out about them? More conflicting was to be in love with a criminal, a crime lord no less. Jackie vaguely wondered if Valmont had ever actually killed some one. That wasn't too pleasant a thought, so he pushed it out of his mind. The warm body next to him didn't seem capable of anything but love.
Black was all too happy to hear all about the Dark Hand's hide out at the fish cannery, and he had surely reported it to his superiors by now. Oddly, telling him about Valmont staying with him seemed to 'slip' Jackie's mind. Oops.
Uncle hadn't said anything about Valmont still staying with them. Jackie did catch a couple odd looks from all three of the other people when he and Valmont were strangely nice to eachother or stood a little too close. Uncle was the only one of them who knew about his 'orientation,' and was probably suspicious. "You can't keep me hidden forever….." Jackie worried about his family's acceptance. It would most certainly be a long stretch to hope for any. No, now was hardly the time for such a bombshell.
Jade stood in the hall hugging her homework to her chest. She glanced around and headed back downstairs quickly. Of all the things she expected to find Jackie doing, THAT was the last.
---------------Time Passes Alarmingly Fast---------------------------------- ------------
Finn splashed water on his face to try and wake himself up. He blinked sleepy-eyed at his reflection. His still wet hair hung down in his face, and he left it there. "Another great day of doing nothing. And in between, being yelled at and threatened. I can't wait."
The redhead went to his closet and went through the mess of flares and large lapels to find his favorite white suit. He lethargically threw it on, making sure to leave a couple buttons undone at the top. That was when he finally grabbed a comb and slicked back the red tangle.
He checked himself out in the mirror. "Mmm. Lookin' good." He said, pulling the collar up and adjusting it. Finn leaned across the counter, grinning, to look at how clean his teeth were. He had opened the drawer to look for floss when his hand ran across a toothbrush that normally wasn't there. Picking the thing up, he found it was a white and teal 'Reach' that didn't belong to him. It was Chow's.
Finn's eyes narrowed. The object rose a knot in his throat. Chow had taken to totally ignoring him lately. Finn had been dejected before. But this was different.
He held the brush tightly for a moment before looking away. It hurt too much to look at it. He considered a second, then put it gingerly back and shut the drawer.
Maybe, it's owner would come back for it.
Maybe.
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Ratso was glad when Shendu had allowed him to continue attempting to solve the puzzle that was the Pan Ku box. He played around with the box a lot. Not only was it a challenge, but it kept his mind occupied. Chow was in the room with him, hanging himself over a box, exaggerating his boredom. He was poking buttons on the camera in his hand.
"Somehow, the zoom button was more entertaining an hour ago." He said. "I almost got it, I'm sure." Ratso said, ignoring Chow's comment. The Asian enforcer stared at him a moment, "Geez, how can you possibly stand messing with that thing for such a long time?" "Its fun." Ratso said, raising an eyebrow. "Sure."
Chow turned on the camera and started recording tuna crates. "Tuna. More tuna. Whoa, watch out! Dolphin-Safe tuna! Hmm. Suddenly I'm hungry. Hey, look at that! SALMON! No, wait, it's tuna."
"Hey, Chow." "Yes, Game-Geek?" Chow said, swinging the camera around to record the other man. "You wanna turn that off?" "Fine." He pressed the little red button and it stopped recording. "Everything okay with you and Finn?" Ratso asked. Chow paused for a second, "Why do you ask?" Ratso shrugged and looked back at the Pan Ku box, "Well, you've been avoid eachother. You seemed kinda tense earlier. You two fightin' or something?"
"Not that it's any of your business," Chow snapped. Ratso recoiled, "Sorry." He said. Chow sighed. He and Finn had not talked in a while. It was a stupid thing, he knew it, and he was the only one who could fix it. But, somehow, he just couldn't bring himself to say the truth. Maybe that in itself was reason enough not to say anything. At least, that's what he told himself. "It's nothing. Don't let it keep you up." He stopped leaning on the box and turned to leave when a light started to glow from the Pan Ku box. "Yes!" Ratso said in triumph. "Chow, get a shot of this!" The magic box rose out of his hands and a beam of light lit up a map. Chow turned the camera on it. "What is that, Rome?" "Oh boy! I like spaghetti!"
---------------Time Passes Alarmingly Fast---------------------------------- ------------
Shendu was contented to pad along behind the humans down the dark Italian street. Tall walls towered on either side of them, hiding his dragony form in the shadows. Chow was in front of the party, holding the Pan Ku box and a fold out tourist's map of the city. Ratso wondered along next to him, pointing out something on the map every once and a while. Finn was lagging behind them both, playing with a bit of paper. Shendu thought about telling him to knock it off, but decided to ignore it instead. Hak Foo was not present, as he seemed very good at being since Valmont and Shendu had been separated.
Because he no longer controlled Valmont, the crime lord's call could not be made for a DH jet to fly to Rome. Luckily, though, he had a few high-rank Dark Hand enforcers in his pocket under the threat of flaming death. Most people in the organization would follow Finn's order alone. The whole place knew Finn as a kind of right hand guy to Valmont, something he probably didn't deserve. (few knew how very little 'Big V' really liked him) At any rate, they had their jet, and their pilot, and now they were in a deserted street in Rome, following the Pan Ku box's directions.
So long as Jackie Chan didn't show up before Shendu was out of there, everything would go just fine. Then again, when did anything ever go 'just fine?'
They approached the end of the street, where it spilt out into some sort of a round plaza, when the Pan Ku box began to glow an eerie green. Chow paused a moment in surprise, then continued to walk forward. "Looks like we found it." He said passingly. Suddenly, the box shot from his hand and flew through the air. It lodged above a door where light surrounded it momentarily before a red portal frame expanded itself outwards.
All being stood back as the purple swirls were penetrated from the demon realm. A great blue hand reach out before the whole creature slithered through. The blue water sorceress emerged fully into the square and stretched her arms with a pleased sigh while the portal quietly closed itself. "So nice to be free! Banishment is highly overrated." She said in her bubbly voice.
Shendu stepped forward to greet her pleasantly, "A heartfelt welcome back, Sister Bai." "Shendu. Am I too hasty to trust that you have finished your set task? Or have you somehow bypassed failure for once?" Shendu paused. "Ahhh….." A good while had past since he tasted Jackie Chan's blood, and he had not made an effort on the mortal's life since. He in fact hadn't seen Jackie Chan since then. Three choices then: Lie, avoid, or run like hell.
Unfortunately, a healed Jackie Chan chose that moment to do a very good job of answering for him.
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Notes: As always, R&R.
Free jokes just for fun:
1) Two pretzels were walking down the street and one was assaulted (a salted)
2) Two apples were sitting in an oven. One says to the other, "Boy it's hot in here!" And the other one says, "Oh my god, it's a talking apple!!!"
Hahahaa!
*Does Jackie OWN that green car he was driving in that one western episode? Uncle's dialogue sure made it seem like that. So, where does he put it? You never see it. He never drives it. What's up with Jackie's car???
Constructive criticism in reviews is welcomed and noted: stupid flames are not. Please don't expect any Shakespeare, Nivin or Wells here; this is a fanfiction site and all the stories are amateur. So I'm sorry if I'm not a best-seller novelist. Just don't flame me.
For those of you who don't know, an elasti-plast is a Band-Aid. It's an English thing. They're both brand names. I honestly don't know why it's called a plaster though.
Oh yes, and I have NO idea how to spell elasti-plast.
And I don't own elasti-plast OR Band-Aid.
This chapter kinda re-writes the whole Bai Tsa thing. All well. Lots of things in this story screw with the real story line.
Blood is Thicker Than Water- Bai Tsa is Both and Shendu Still Doesn't Like Her
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Valmont jumped between the demon and Jackie, blindly trying to protect the injured man. He landed a kick on the scaly side of Shendu, knocking him aside. The demon landed hard, sprawled out, and skidded across the floor and into the sales counter. Valmont was surprised; for his size, Shendu was light.
Behind the demon, three enforcers got up and ran out the front door. The mountain of a man he was fighting with tossed Hak Foo, making his body make an unpleasant sound as it hit against the floor. Shendu stood back up, eyes glowing a flaming red. He shot daggers at Valmont for the attack.
Next thing the man knew, a burst of flame was coming for him. He dodged to the left, getting a singed pant leg, but surviving. Another blast came from the demon's direction and Valmont was barely able to avoid being burnt to a crisp.
Shendu prepared a third attack on Valmont when he was caught up in a bear hug from behind, all the air leaving his lungs. He was lifted off the ground, sputtering, by Tohru. He struggled and clawed, trying to break free, but was held tightly. Suddenly, his minion warriors, the shadowkhan, surrounded the room. Shendu laughed resoundingly. Tohru, not amused, squeezed as tight as he could, causing the laugh to taper into a squeak.
The shadowkhan circled Tohru, then, their capes held out to block view, swarmed onto him. A voice came from behind the black wall, "I WILL get you CHAN!!!" Shendu screamed. The black ninjas fell back and disappeared into the ground, leaving Tohru, but no Shendu, behind.
For a moment, the shop was very quiet as they all looked on at the chaotic scene left behind.
Valmont stood still in the middle of the room. Nearby, Tohru and Uncle did the same. Jackie sat on the floor; his leg bloody and mangled. Valmont turned and went to his side, kneeling on one knee. "Are you all right??" He asked. Jackie winced, "Not really. My leg's practically been torn off, for one thing." The one leg of the khaki's were tattered and soaked in blood. Valmont rolled them up and examined the leg. Several huge tears, crescent moon shaped, ran all over his lower leg. They were deep; deep enough to see the gray meat under the skin. He was bleeding profusely. "We have to stop the bleeding. We're going to need a VERY big elasti-plast." Valmont said. He turned to the old chi wizard. "Bandages?"
Jade burst through the shop front door. "JACKIEEE!!!!" She yelled. "Oh my god, are you okay?!?! Is your leg okay?!?!" She said, keeping her distance from the blood. "Jade! I'll be fine." Jackie said. Excitable Jade jumped up and down where she stood. "How did Shendu get a body!?" Jade asked, "And why's he here?" She shoved a thumb in Valmont's direction.
"Valmont came here so Uncle could cast a spell and free him of Shendu. I don't know the answer to the other one." Valmont thought about answering that for him, but decided against it. No one seemed to like it when he talked, no matter WHAT was coming out.
Uncle bandaged Jackie's leg with minimal remarks about his nice shop floor being stained: a veritable bloodbath. When asked if he could stand, he said he didn't know. Valmont on one side, Uncle on the other, they helped him up. Jackie felt light headed from blood loss, and standing up didn't help it. He tried to put weight on the leg but immediately recoiled in pain. The muscle was too badly damaged: trying to stand on it would only make things worse.
Jade wasn't making things any more pleasant. As they loaded the injured man carefully into the back seat of his green car*, she was constantly chattering about how awful the situation was, "Oh my god, oh my god! They're probably going to AMPUTATE it!! That's SO gross! Not that THAT isn't gross there," -she pointed at his leg- "Then you'll never do kung fu again and I'll only have three fourths of an uncle!!!" "Jade, that's crazy." Jackie said, "My leg's going to be just fine. They're not going to have to," -pause to avoid gagging at the thought- "Amputate it."
Jade leaned into the car, "What if you get some awful infection? I learned in school about this nasty decease that makes your skin get all puffy and red, and slimy stuff oozes from it and-" Jackie gritted his teeth and tried not to throw up.
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Shendu stood glaring at the four humans. Bits of what had been a white sofa and a crate of who-knows-what fish product sat smoldering in one corner of the room. A pile of scared enforcers stood in the other (once again attempting an invisibility act and failing) staring at the smoldering bits.
"Uh, nevermind?" Finn said. Chow stepped forward and smiled really, really big, "Uh, yeah! What we MEANT was, we'd LOVE to keep helping you out with the demon portals and stuff." Ratso nodded. "Uh huh" "I'm glad you decided that." Shendu said. He turned his back on them, letting them leave the room with their hides. In the hall, Shendu's keen hearing picked up, "You're an idiot!" "I whole heartedly agree." He mumbled to himself.
"SHENDU!" The demon tossed his head around in surprise at his sister's voice. The image of the blue demon sorceress appeared on the large, full-body mirror behind him. Shendu's mighty demeanor with the humans was suddenly pushed aside for the sniveling, suck up one he reserved for his siblings. "Sister Bai! Ah, nice to see you. Doing well I trust?"
"Cut it, Shendu!" Bai Tsa snapped at him. "What are you doing out of the human host??"
"I, uh, well you see….."
"Nevermind. We'll discuss THAT later. Now, I have been waiting here for my portal to open, and oddly enough, it hasn't! Why is that Shendu? Am I took think that PERHAPS Chan's demise is not completed?"
"Aahhhlllmost is. Came just this close-"
"HE'S NOT DEAD?!"
"Not quite!"
"He either is or he is not. From what you say, it seems he is most decidedly NOT. Shendu, I grow increasingly impatient with you!"
Shendu shifted his weight nervously and held out a hand in apology, "Ah, Sister, I have OF COURSE been doing all I can to remove Jackie Chan and proceed to release you. It is but a MINOR delay, I assure you!"
"Shendu, no more little side quests! I want out of here NOW! You got that?"
"Ahh, yes, Sister Bai! I was just about to-"
"I had better be out of this realm and into that one before the end of the week or you will live to regret it!" and with that, she disappeared, leaving only Shendu's reflection for him to look at. Shendu muttered an insult in Chinese under his breath.
Screw killing Jackie Chan for now. He'd go ahead and just open the portal. Now that he wasn't stuck to Valmont, he had no reason to want the success of his siblings. Who cares if Bai Tsa got sucked back in? He never liked her anyway.
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"You look better." Jade said. "I should hope so." Jackie pointed out. Just about anything looked better than his leg with it's fresh wounds and blood everywhere. He leaned on his crutch and headed upstairs. "You done your homework?" "Ahh, not yet." "Do that now, please." He said politely. Jade groaned but obeyed him and retrieved her assignment from her backpack.
Jackie assailed the stairs shakily, weight never touching his left leg. At the top, he chose the room Valmont was in to enter. "Knock knock?" He said. Valmont looked up from a book he was reading. Some law fiction Jackie would have found insanely boring. "Oh, hello. Come in." He said, putting the book down. Jackie plopped himself on the bed. (The same one they had soiled with their coitus a couple days ago)
"Your leg doing okay?" Valmont asked him. Jackie nodded, "It's not giving too much trouble. Then again, I've been better….." Valmont got up from the chair he was in to sit down next to Jackie. "I'm quite sure you have."
He was released from the hospital with white bandages surrounding his lower left leg the morning after it had happened. He had lost a lot of blood, but fortunately not enough for it to be too big a problem. He just couldn't give blood for a while. The thought of a transfusion reminded him too much of events not far in the past.
The nurse had been quite impressed with the size of damage the 'wolf' had done to him. Well, he couldn't exactly tell them a dragon-demon tried to rip his leg off, could he? It was still tender to stand on, so he avoided walking whenever he could. He was going to be staying at Uncle's (Section 13 seemed too much of a trial for him, especially getting in and out.) and so, Jade was too. With all five people there, it was a little cramped. Jackie shared Tohru's room while Jade got to sleep on a couch. This was chosen as preferable to Uncle's room and smelling garlic all night. Valmont was stuffed, alone, in the room he had been discovered in.
Jackie leaned his head against Valmont's chest. He was mentally taxed for the day and was just seeking a little unconditional comfort. The crime lord hugged him up close, "Everything alright?" Jackie sighed. "Yeah. Things are just a little….." "Yeah." Valmont kissed his head. Jackie looked up and kissed him on the lips.
Captain Black had been concerned. Jackie had been missing from his mind for a couple days, and then he had shown up with half his leg practically torn off. Jackie had, of course (because he's Jackie), explained everything. Black had been quite a bit pissed when the story was over, both at Jackie for keeping the kidnaps a secret and at his friend's near death.
Jackie knew just how Black felt. He remembered when Black had almost been killed by the dragon talisman. Funny, he wasn't so pissed at Valmont for that anymore. Maybe he should be. It was a little conflicting to have a best friend and a lover who are mortal enemies. What would Gus say if he ever found out about them? More conflicting was to be in love with a criminal, a crime lord no less. Jackie vaguely wondered if Valmont had ever actually killed some one. That wasn't too pleasant a thought, so he pushed it out of his mind. The warm body next to him didn't seem capable of anything but love.
Black was all too happy to hear all about the Dark Hand's hide out at the fish cannery, and he had surely reported it to his superiors by now. Oddly, telling him about Valmont staying with him seemed to 'slip' Jackie's mind. Oops.
Uncle hadn't said anything about Valmont still staying with them. Jackie did catch a couple odd looks from all three of the other people when he and Valmont were strangely nice to eachother or stood a little too close. Uncle was the only one of them who knew about his 'orientation,' and was probably suspicious. "You can't keep me hidden forever….." Jackie worried about his family's acceptance. It would most certainly be a long stretch to hope for any. No, now was hardly the time for such a bombshell.
Jade stood in the hall hugging her homework to her chest. She glanced around and headed back downstairs quickly. Of all the things she expected to find Jackie doing, THAT was the last.
---------------Time Passes Alarmingly Fast---------------------------------- ------------
Finn splashed water on his face to try and wake himself up. He blinked sleepy-eyed at his reflection. His still wet hair hung down in his face, and he left it there. "Another great day of doing nothing. And in between, being yelled at and threatened. I can't wait."
The redhead went to his closet and went through the mess of flares and large lapels to find his favorite white suit. He lethargically threw it on, making sure to leave a couple buttons undone at the top. That was when he finally grabbed a comb and slicked back the red tangle.
He checked himself out in the mirror. "Mmm. Lookin' good." He said, pulling the collar up and adjusting it. Finn leaned across the counter, grinning, to look at how clean his teeth were. He had opened the drawer to look for floss when his hand ran across a toothbrush that normally wasn't there. Picking the thing up, he found it was a white and teal 'Reach' that didn't belong to him. It was Chow's.
Finn's eyes narrowed. The object rose a knot in his throat. Chow had taken to totally ignoring him lately. Finn had been dejected before. But this was different.
He held the brush tightly for a moment before looking away. It hurt too much to look at it. He considered a second, then put it gingerly back and shut the drawer.
Maybe, it's owner would come back for it.
Maybe.
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Ratso was glad when Shendu had allowed him to continue attempting to solve the puzzle that was the Pan Ku box. He played around with the box a lot. Not only was it a challenge, but it kept his mind occupied. Chow was in the room with him, hanging himself over a box, exaggerating his boredom. He was poking buttons on the camera in his hand.
"Somehow, the zoom button was more entertaining an hour ago." He said. "I almost got it, I'm sure." Ratso said, ignoring Chow's comment. The Asian enforcer stared at him a moment, "Geez, how can you possibly stand messing with that thing for such a long time?" "Its fun." Ratso said, raising an eyebrow. "Sure."
Chow turned on the camera and started recording tuna crates. "Tuna. More tuna. Whoa, watch out! Dolphin-Safe tuna! Hmm. Suddenly I'm hungry. Hey, look at that! SALMON! No, wait, it's tuna."
"Hey, Chow." "Yes, Game-Geek?" Chow said, swinging the camera around to record the other man. "You wanna turn that off?" "Fine." He pressed the little red button and it stopped recording. "Everything okay with you and Finn?" Ratso asked. Chow paused for a second, "Why do you ask?" Ratso shrugged and looked back at the Pan Ku box, "Well, you've been avoid eachother. You seemed kinda tense earlier. You two fightin' or something?"
"Not that it's any of your business," Chow snapped. Ratso recoiled, "Sorry." He said. Chow sighed. He and Finn had not talked in a while. It was a stupid thing, he knew it, and he was the only one who could fix it. But, somehow, he just couldn't bring himself to say the truth. Maybe that in itself was reason enough not to say anything. At least, that's what he told himself. "It's nothing. Don't let it keep you up." He stopped leaning on the box and turned to leave when a light started to glow from the Pan Ku box. "Yes!" Ratso said in triumph. "Chow, get a shot of this!" The magic box rose out of his hands and a beam of light lit up a map. Chow turned the camera on it. "What is that, Rome?" "Oh boy! I like spaghetti!"
---------------Time Passes Alarmingly Fast---------------------------------- ------------
Shendu was contented to pad along behind the humans down the dark Italian street. Tall walls towered on either side of them, hiding his dragony form in the shadows. Chow was in front of the party, holding the Pan Ku box and a fold out tourist's map of the city. Ratso wondered along next to him, pointing out something on the map every once and a while. Finn was lagging behind them both, playing with a bit of paper. Shendu thought about telling him to knock it off, but decided to ignore it instead. Hak Foo was not present, as he seemed very good at being since Valmont and Shendu had been separated.
Because he no longer controlled Valmont, the crime lord's call could not be made for a DH jet to fly to Rome. Luckily, though, he had a few high-rank Dark Hand enforcers in his pocket under the threat of flaming death. Most people in the organization would follow Finn's order alone. The whole place knew Finn as a kind of right hand guy to Valmont, something he probably didn't deserve. (few knew how very little 'Big V' really liked him) At any rate, they had their jet, and their pilot, and now they were in a deserted street in Rome, following the Pan Ku box's directions.
So long as Jackie Chan didn't show up before Shendu was out of there, everything would go just fine. Then again, when did anything ever go 'just fine?'
They approached the end of the street, where it spilt out into some sort of a round plaza, when the Pan Ku box began to glow an eerie green. Chow paused a moment in surprise, then continued to walk forward. "Looks like we found it." He said passingly. Suddenly, the box shot from his hand and flew through the air. It lodged above a door where light surrounded it momentarily before a red portal frame expanded itself outwards.
All being stood back as the purple swirls were penetrated from the demon realm. A great blue hand reach out before the whole creature slithered through. The blue water sorceress emerged fully into the square and stretched her arms with a pleased sigh while the portal quietly closed itself. "So nice to be free! Banishment is highly overrated." She said in her bubbly voice.
Shendu stepped forward to greet her pleasantly, "A heartfelt welcome back, Sister Bai." "Shendu. Am I too hasty to trust that you have finished your set task? Or have you somehow bypassed failure for once?" Shendu paused. "Ahhh….." A good while had past since he tasted Jackie Chan's blood, and he had not made an effort on the mortal's life since. He in fact hadn't seen Jackie Chan since then. Three choices then: Lie, avoid, or run like hell.
Unfortunately, a healed Jackie Chan chose that moment to do a very good job of answering for him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Notes: As always, R&R.
Free jokes just for fun:
1) Two pretzels were walking down the street and one was assaulted (a salted)
2) Two apples were sitting in an oven. One says to the other, "Boy it's hot in here!" And the other one says, "Oh my god, it's a talking apple!!!"
Hahahaa!
*Does Jackie OWN that green car he was driving in that one western episode? Uncle's dialogue sure made it seem like that. So, where does he put it? You never see it. He never drives it. What's up with Jackie's car???