Tenchi Muyo In Love 3
Final Comments
Chapter 1
This is setting up for the rest of the story. I start with Tenchi's Narration, which always seems to start a Tenchi in Love movie (or at least someone does it, I think).
At the beginning, Tenchi is depressed, and seeks Washu's help (knowing that Washu can do just about anything, even bring back the shadow of a dead Goddess). The ultimate solution, now that I've read some similar fan fictions, is rather unique, although mainly because of my ignorance which lead to the creation of another universe. Anyway, the idea of going into a "void universe" where souls go was incredibly interesting.
Mayuka I added to the story, of course, because of my love for the character, which is why I had her brought back in the first place (in one of my not-so-good fan fictions [in my opinion, anyway, it didn't get much of a review from anyone]). I feel she plays a very emotional role in this story, particularly. She has a love for her father, and she's a unique character in the way that Tenchi can return that love without having to worry (too much) about Ayeka and Ryoko. Although she certainly go to the point of obsession with her daughterly love, it's a key part of her personality, and a thing that simply makes her adorable. ^_^
Also, I think that Tenchi has kinda gotten used to the routine of Washu's solutions to problems having a catch to them, is not only a progression of his character development, but a bit funny as well.
Sure, I've take liberties to make the entire plan work for Tenchi, but this is my universe, so I can do this, and besides, no one is complaining (yet).
Then there's Tenchi's incredibly long speech, which explains a lot of things, plus the theme of family that I've incorporated into the story.
Then, there's the promise to Mayuka, which continues the idea of the Tenchi/Mayuka relationship, which I feel is key in this story, and I'll likely continue to use this relationship in future stories.
Chapter 2
The effect of the universe trip is in fact a visual effects idea I had, and is visualized in my head. The idea of basically standing still while worlds and alternate possibilities flash past you, was a very interesting one (as I've commented about some other ideas I've had in this story). If this were a movie, this would make an awesome visual effect.
Also, the concept of memories of Tenchi's apartment allowed me to create a setting that does not need too much describing (if you've seen the TV show, that is).
Also, there's the empathic link Tenchi seems to have with Sakuya (because of Tenchi's Juari powers, most likely). That and the fact that he's inside her soul can have a kind of aura effect or something like that.
Also, the concept of time passing by differently is also "interesting" lol. I feel that it matches with my multiverse theories (see my guide to the multiverse in the crossovers section, or just search for my pen name and take a look at some of my other works as well).
The characters have a bit more time to develop this way, and Tenchi's actions can be much more fast paced and sequential.
And Mayuka, of course, misses "daddy".
Chapter 3
Tenchi finds out that he's inside Sakuya's soul. Then he must locate her "persona", which is a manifestation of her that's within her soul. He finds her, of course. Then trouble begins when they discover that Yugi might also be in the void.
Chapter 4
The dream Mayuka has is something I created in a remake of Tenchi in Love 2 (which is a version with Mayuka in it). In the story, Mayuka dreams her father was taken away from her (and if you've seen the movie, he was), so she has prophetic dreams about her father (going along with my idea of empathic links, apparently).
Oh yes, and I guess I repeated myself in a later chapter, I might change it because it's weird. Anyway, the fight scene was…*ahem*…fascinating (you thought I was going to say interesting, weren't you…well, you were right, but I changed my mind).
Then she takes Sakuya hostage and…
Chapter 5
The negotiation takes place and really a bunch of these chapters don't have much thought I can comment on beyond synopsis and saying how interesting or fascinating my ideas were. Washu does have a development when she decides to delete Yugi's file, but that's about it. Then we end up in Yugi's soul.
Chapter 6
Here's where I need to change it a bit, and by the time you read this, it will (hopefully) be changed. Saying that Washu had just figured it out is a lie now that I've read back a bit. Now I see she talked about it before. The revision will state that she simply figured out where the sources of the energy are. You should be able to read it by now.
Here is the key moment where I resolve Ryoko's love for Tenchi, and return to the theme of family and belonging. I feel that T+R fans, and the one who read this definitely was pleased with the way it was done. It makes sure that Ryoko accepts Tenchi and Sakuya without seeming out of character. Of course, Ayeka is a bit easier, because she, I think anyway, has resolved her feeling for Tenchi in the way that she wants what's best for him, and if that means him being with a woman other than her, she can live with that.
I decided not to delve too much into that, in fact, I only delved into it slightly. In the end the point is that both of them accept Sakuya as the one who's meant for Tenchi.
Chapter 7
This chapter is self-explanatory, I think.
Chapter 8
The entire asking to marry thing was basically improvised, as in I made it up on the fly. I think it's kind of hilarious, and it sort of mimics how I think it could happen in real life. My only fear is that I may have taken the dialog too far, and it may have gone on too long.
Chapter 9
This chapter basically sets up for the new series and also adds Ayumi (my favorite J-Pop artist) to the story.
Some characters are taking a bit of a back seat during this period in the story, but I hope to give them a greater part in the next chapter. (I'm writing this before I write the chapter).
Chapter 10
This is the wedding, and I improvised Tenchi nearly feinting because I felt it would be in character for him and would make it more light-hearted and less serious without making it necessarily unserious. Also, I thought that it was DEFINITELY in character for Ryoko and Ayeka to give their consent for Tenchi to marry Sakuya, at least in the wedding setting, because they're giving him up even more so than Tenchi's father is. I had to jump around the wedding transcript for two reasons: #1: I didn't want to bore the reader with a bunch of speeches about marriage, although some people like these speeches, and I myself like most of the ones in the transcript I found, I acknowledge that not everyone finds these things interesting, so I kept the important parts that everyone knows is in a wedding. #2 This is supposed to be a Japanese wedding, so I had to cut around the multiple references to God (which might explain to you why at some points the dialog seems to skip over something mildly important).
Chapter 11
This is the story where I have the singers and some dialogs with members of Tenchi's extended family, and to just have an exciting receptions, and there were also in here some parts that weren't mentioned, I hope they were givens, however. Like the wedding photos, etc., which I think you can just assume, occurred at some point during the reception.
I hope to get an anime-style artist to work on some artwork for this project, it will be the final step in the creation of this fan fiction.
And then we continue on to the first episode in Tenchi Americana! Which is "Tenchi in Hawaii!" YAY! The episode will basically chronicle their honeymoon before they head to California for college.
Once again, I thank you for reading this story, and I have to say this is my first complete "epic" fan fiction, and I've been more dedicated to this that to any of my other projects, and I hope to continue my dedication into the new series. But that does not mean I'll lose focus on some of my other projects, which I may end up returning to at some point (probably after the first few "episodes" of Tenchi Americana!)
Also, I'm considering a crazy crossover story called "Tenchi Vs. Ranma!", and a Director's cut of the Tenchi Muyo! Character Bash Fest!
The website for my universe will be done very soon, hopefully by the time you read this: http://draconic.xtremezero.net/jdhgtu
Final Comments
Chapter 1
This is setting up for the rest of the story. I start with Tenchi's Narration, which always seems to start a Tenchi in Love movie (or at least someone does it, I think).
At the beginning, Tenchi is depressed, and seeks Washu's help (knowing that Washu can do just about anything, even bring back the shadow of a dead Goddess). The ultimate solution, now that I've read some similar fan fictions, is rather unique, although mainly because of my ignorance which lead to the creation of another universe. Anyway, the idea of going into a "void universe" where souls go was incredibly interesting.
Mayuka I added to the story, of course, because of my love for the character, which is why I had her brought back in the first place (in one of my not-so-good fan fictions [in my opinion, anyway, it didn't get much of a review from anyone]). I feel she plays a very emotional role in this story, particularly. She has a love for her father, and she's a unique character in the way that Tenchi can return that love without having to worry (too much) about Ayeka and Ryoko. Although she certainly go to the point of obsession with her daughterly love, it's a key part of her personality, and a thing that simply makes her adorable. ^_^
Also, I think that Tenchi has kinda gotten used to the routine of Washu's solutions to problems having a catch to them, is not only a progression of his character development, but a bit funny as well.
Sure, I've take liberties to make the entire plan work for Tenchi, but this is my universe, so I can do this, and besides, no one is complaining (yet).
Then there's Tenchi's incredibly long speech, which explains a lot of things, plus the theme of family that I've incorporated into the story.
Then, there's the promise to Mayuka, which continues the idea of the Tenchi/Mayuka relationship, which I feel is key in this story, and I'll likely continue to use this relationship in future stories.
Chapter 2
The effect of the universe trip is in fact a visual effects idea I had, and is visualized in my head. The idea of basically standing still while worlds and alternate possibilities flash past you, was a very interesting one (as I've commented about some other ideas I've had in this story). If this were a movie, this would make an awesome visual effect.
Also, the concept of memories of Tenchi's apartment allowed me to create a setting that does not need too much describing (if you've seen the TV show, that is).
Also, there's the empathic link Tenchi seems to have with Sakuya (because of Tenchi's Juari powers, most likely). That and the fact that he's inside her soul can have a kind of aura effect or something like that.
Also, the concept of time passing by differently is also "interesting" lol. I feel that it matches with my multiverse theories (see my guide to the multiverse in the crossovers section, or just search for my pen name and take a look at some of my other works as well).
The characters have a bit more time to develop this way, and Tenchi's actions can be much more fast paced and sequential.
And Mayuka, of course, misses "daddy".
Chapter 3
Tenchi finds out that he's inside Sakuya's soul. Then he must locate her "persona", which is a manifestation of her that's within her soul. He finds her, of course. Then trouble begins when they discover that Yugi might also be in the void.
Chapter 4
The dream Mayuka has is something I created in a remake of Tenchi in Love 2 (which is a version with Mayuka in it). In the story, Mayuka dreams her father was taken away from her (and if you've seen the movie, he was), so she has prophetic dreams about her father (going along with my idea of empathic links, apparently).
Oh yes, and I guess I repeated myself in a later chapter, I might change it because it's weird. Anyway, the fight scene was…*ahem*…fascinating (you thought I was going to say interesting, weren't you…well, you were right, but I changed my mind).
Then she takes Sakuya hostage and…
Chapter 5
The negotiation takes place and really a bunch of these chapters don't have much thought I can comment on beyond synopsis and saying how interesting or fascinating my ideas were. Washu does have a development when she decides to delete Yugi's file, but that's about it. Then we end up in Yugi's soul.
Chapter 6
Here's where I need to change it a bit, and by the time you read this, it will (hopefully) be changed. Saying that Washu had just figured it out is a lie now that I've read back a bit. Now I see she talked about it before. The revision will state that she simply figured out where the sources of the energy are. You should be able to read it by now.
Here is the key moment where I resolve Ryoko's love for Tenchi, and return to the theme of family and belonging. I feel that T+R fans, and the one who read this definitely was pleased with the way it was done. It makes sure that Ryoko accepts Tenchi and Sakuya without seeming out of character. Of course, Ayeka is a bit easier, because she, I think anyway, has resolved her feeling for Tenchi in the way that she wants what's best for him, and if that means him being with a woman other than her, she can live with that.
I decided not to delve too much into that, in fact, I only delved into it slightly. In the end the point is that both of them accept Sakuya as the one who's meant for Tenchi.
Chapter 7
This chapter is self-explanatory, I think.
Chapter 8
The entire asking to marry thing was basically improvised, as in I made it up on the fly. I think it's kind of hilarious, and it sort of mimics how I think it could happen in real life. My only fear is that I may have taken the dialog too far, and it may have gone on too long.
Chapter 9
This chapter basically sets up for the new series and also adds Ayumi (my favorite J-Pop artist) to the story.
Some characters are taking a bit of a back seat during this period in the story, but I hope to give them a greater part in the next chapter. (I'm writing this before I write the chapter).
Chapter 10
This is the wedding, and I improvised Tenchi nearly feinting because I felt it would be in character for him and would make it more light-hearted and less serious without making it necessarily unserious. Also, I thought that it was DEFINITELY in character for Ryoko and Ayeka to give their consent for Tenchi to marry Sakuya, at least in the wedding setting, because they're giving him up even more so than Tenchi's father is. I had to jump around the wedding transcript for two reasons: #1: I didn't want to bore the reader with a bunch of speeches about marriage, although some people like these speeches, and I myself like most of the ones in the transcript I found, I acknowledge that not everyone finds these things interesting, so I kept the important parts that everyone knows is in a wedding. #2 This is supposed to be a Japanese wedding, so I had to cut around the multiple references to God (which might explain to you why at some points the dialog seems to skip over something mildly important).
Chapter 11
This is the story where I have the singers and some dialogs with members of Tenchi's extended family, and to just have an exciting receptions, and there were also in here some parts that weren't mentioned, I hope they were givens, however. Like the wedding photos, etc., which I think you can just assume, occurred at some point during the reception.
I hope to get an anime-style artist to work on some artwork for this project, it will be the final step in the creation of this fan fiction.
And then we continue on to the first episode in Tenchi Americana! Which is "Tenchi in Hawaii!" YAY! The episode will basically chronicle their honeymoon before they head to California for college.
Once again, I thank you for reading this story, and I have to say this is my first complete "epic" fan fiction, and I've been more dedicated to this that to any of my other projects, and I hope to continue my dedication into the new series. But that does not mean I'll lose focus on some of my other projects, which I may end up returning to at some point (probably after the first few "episodes" of Tenchi Americana!)
Also, I'm considering a crazy crossover story called "Tenchi Vs. Ranma!", and a Director's cut of the Tenchi Muyo! Character Bash Fest!
The website for my universe will be done very soon, hopefully by the time you read this: http://draconic.xtremezero.net/jdhgtu