Mike Franks is an interesting character, to say the least.
They had only met a handful of times before this, all of those interactions being while he was helping Gibbs on a case. She had been hearing about him well before she was Director, but never having actually worked with the man left a big question mark in her mind.
She sees why Gibbs liked him. He was a man of few words and only spoke when it was important. She doesn't know if she would have liked to work under him, but she can respect that he has his own way of doing things. It's one of the reasons she chose to contact him and not an active agent.
"You're one big mystery, ya know that?" They had been driving to Deckers home in relative silence thus far and she hadn't expected a word from him until they reached their destination.
"Funny," She quips, "I was just thinking the same about you."
Mike snorts, "Not the same. I'm a mystery because you don't know anything about me. You're a mystery because I know a great deal about you and not a lick of it makes sense."
Jenny rolls her eyes, "Which part? That I'm by the book but going off record? Or that I take my position as Director seriously yet are putting myself in danger? That I made a mistake and didn't fix it at the time?"
He's silent for a moment, clearly considering her words before he speaks.
"Agents by the book always have a little bit of rouge in them so that doesn't surprise me. What's getting me is all the things Gibbs has said about you ain't adding up to what I'm seeing."
She's not surprised that he knows more about her than she does him. There wasn't any doubt that her resurgence in his life came up when he left for Mexico, though it's anyone guess what Gibbs told him about their relationship. She had hoped nothing at all, but from the way Mike was looking at her she knew that was unlikely.
"Don't let this pretty face fool you, I can be just as much of a hard ass as Gibbs probably made me out to be."
She was hoping he would let it go and settle for her clear deflection of what he was really implying, but she had never been that lucky.
"Cut the crap, Shepard." Franks huffs, "The thing about Probie is that whenever he rants about women there's always a name to them. Diane or Stephanie or whoever they were. Always a name. You? He talked about this mysterious woman who left him on a plane but never said her god damn name."
It startles her. Not that he talked about her, but that he never once said her name and she can't tell if that's better or worse than if he did.
"And you're assuming that's me?"
"Am I wrong?" He counters bluntly.
"It was a long time ago Mike."
"Yeah, long time ago yet he talked about it like it just happened."
"He had a brain injury, of course as his memories came back-" She tries to reason, but he doesn't bother letting her finish.
"Memory had to go away first, and that one had stuck even after he was blown up. So tell me, why is it the woman he thinks one day up and decided she didn't love him anymore is here risking her life with a washed up agent all to protect him, huh?"
Despite the seriousness of everything he was saying she finds herself laughing.
"You're a real piece of work Shepard." Mike says, clearly exasperated with her reaction.
"I'm sorry," She says, taking a deep breath in an effort to compose herself. It wasn't funny, not in the slightest, but rather so ridiculous it's all she can do. "It's just so ridiculous to hear you say that."
"Yeah? How so?" He asks, not satisfied with her answer.
"That I don't love him," She clarifies, "Of all the reasons I could ever give as to why I got off the plane not loving him will never be one."
Her gaze is focused on the road in front of her but she can feel him staring at her.
"I had a five point plan and he didn't fit into it." She goes on to tell him in wake of his silence, "Falling love with him — my boss, no less — didn't fit into what I wanted to accomplish. So I walked away. I had too, I loved him too much and that was dangerous for me. And if you want to start pointing fingers, I truly didn't believe he felt anywhere near the same. I understand now why he never vocalized what he may have felt for me, but not then. Then I thought he didn't say it because he didn't feel it. Not that it excuses what I did to him."
They pull in front of Deckers home and she throws the car in park before finally taking the chance to look him in the eye.
She can tell he's studying her. His nose is wrinkled in concentration, fingers tucked up under his chin as he contemplates her.
She never thought she would be so concerned with the judgment of Mike Franks, yet here she is, worrying that he's only to think of the worst of her.
"Seen a lot of women come and go in probies life since I've been around," He finally says, "Ain't one of them ever been talked about like he talks about you."
It ruins her inside. If she were to get out of this alive, then she'll have to go back home knowing what Mike has told her. And if she does die in the end, he'll never truly know how sorry she is.
"We should go inside." She says simply.
Mike nods, though she can tell this conversation is far from over.
"Lead the way."
Five hours on a plane is too many.
It's particularly too many when he has to spend the entire time unaware as to what was happening on the ground.
He had barked orders at McGee so fast that the younger man had practically jumped out of his seat.
The game Jenny was playing was still unknown to him and that meant he didn't know what his next move should be.
There's no reason for it really; why she would dismiss her detail and go off the grid. She was too by the book and too protective of her position to ever do anything to jeopardize that, which is why he knew immediately something bad had happened.
Deckers death was supposed to be nothing more than a simple heart attack, yet all he can think about is how much the timing of it all didn't sit well with him. Decker dies. Days later, Jenny is off the grid.
He considers calling the LA branch, and by extension the assistant director, but he wouldn't even know what to tell them was the issue. And Jenny would surely kill him if her position was called into question due to her recklessness. Even if at the moment he's having those same questions run through his head.
McGee had managed to triangulate an area where here phone has last been before being turned off. Another thing that is not making any sense in the long line of events from today. Rule 3, never be unreachable. Her especially. Which meant she either turned it off herself or was made too and neither sat well with him.
Tony and Ziva were ordered to go to her last known area and go from there and hopefully she hadn't been too far gone yet.
He just wishes he knew where to begin looking once he touched down.
"Damn it, Jen." He finds himself muttering to himself.
Damn it all.
Deckers girlfriend provided them with both answers and more questions by the time she finished explaining her side of the story.
Not natural causes, then. Not that she didn't already know that but there had been a small part of her that prayed she was wrong and it was simply a heart attack.
So, the diner was their next stop.
"You said don't earlier." Frank's says out of the blue.
She had been so consumed in trying to decipher what Decker could have left behind it almost didn't register that he was speaking to her.
"I beg your pardon?"
"I said he thought you decided you weren't in love with him when you left him on the plane. You said it wasn't because you don't love him, not didn't. I'm talking about the past and you're talking about the present."
It was an easy thing to catch yet she doesn't think the average person would have picked up on it so analytically.
"What's your point?" She huffs. This game of talking about Gibbs was getting old.
"I'm right then, you're still in love with him. Europe or wherever the hell you two were was years ago and yet you talk about loving him then the same as you talk about him now."
This game was getting really old.
But there was no use in arguing with him. She wouldn't change his mind about what was ultimately the truth anyway and, the way she saw it, the chances of her making it out alive were slimmer as the hours go on. It wouldn't matter what she told him in the end.
"I never said I didn't," She finally says, "I loved him then and I love him now. That doesn't change anything. He's my agent and I'm his boss and I've burned that bridge between us long ago."
He eyes her suspiciously and she's suddenly uncomfortable at the intensity he's looking at her with.
"Don't know about that." He says, "Cause he sure as shit still feels some type of way about you. Maybe you can't see it because you decided for him that he didn't, but I see through the both of you and all the bullshit you two made yourselves believe."
It both hurts her and heals her a bit to hear that maybe he did love her back then. She understands now why he never said it to her. He lost a family and she knows all too well how that changes a person. But then? Then she thought she had fallen deeply in love with a person who could never love her back.
"It's doesn't matter, Mike." She says with a shake of her head, "Too much has changed, and whether he figures out he's been the love of my life this whole time now or never learns, I made my bed. And he…he deserves a lot better than someone who left in the most cowardice way. After all that man has gone through, what's he's lost. Well, someone who added more hurt on top of all that does not particularly deserve redemption."
She hopes that's the end of the conversation and they can focus on getting to the diner, but he has to have the last word, just like another man she knows.
"Tell ya' what," He begins, "When this is all over, you tell him. And if you don't make it out, I'll tell him."
She wasn't making it out of this alive, so it wouldn't matter if he knew in the end.
"Deal."