Moiraine awoke in the morning and for the first time – what felt like a decade – she didn't feel exhausted. She needed a moment to remember where she was, but then her eyes fell on Rand, who was sleeping next to her.
'He didn't dream about the Dark One tonight. It seems that it really helps when I'm close to him. But we can't do this forever. We need to break this bond and I can't do it. And I highly doubt it that this Aiel woman will be able to do it.'
Sighing, Moiraine wanted to get up, but then she noticed Lan and Nynaeve, who were lying between her and Rand's bed on the ground. She saw Lan's arm, which laid protectively around Nynaeve's small figure, while the wisdom was snuggling against Lan's chest.
Jealousy rushed through her body, and she had to close her eyes to prevent herself from crying. Where was this coming from? She never had been jealous of anyone, who had a romantic interest in Lan, before. He was her friend, her confidant, her protector, but never her lover. She should be happy for him that he had found someone, who he loved deeply.
'But Lan is loyal. He will never truly be with Nynaeve as long as he is bonded to me. And he deserves it to be happy. He deserves love and a wife, who loves him. I have taken that from him when I bonded him all those years ago.'
Carefully, Moiraine left the bed and went to the door. No one woke up. She threw one last glance at the sleeping lovers, then she opened the door and left the cottage.
Lan awoke when he felt Nynaeve stirring. His back was hurting from spending the whole night on the floor, but still… it felt good to awake with Nynaeve in his arms. Smiling, he inhaled her unique scent, while she was groaning. Apparently, her back was hurting as well.
Suddenly, the door of the cottage closed with a loud bang. Everyone sat upright, ready to fight the threat, but it was only Mother Fiosä, who was walking to a table filled with herbs, while she was mumbling angrily: "This stupid woman! Thinks she knows best, although she knows nothing! She could at least listen to me!"
"What happened?", Rand asked tiredly and rubbed his eyes. Obviously, his tired brain didn't realize how dangerous his question was.
Nonetheless, Mother Fiosä heard him and threw a wooden spoon at him. "What happened?! I tell you what happened! This stupid woman walks around as if nothing had happened, although I wasn't even able to clear her! But when I tell her this, she seems to know it better! I AM the wisdom here! I tell people if they are strong or well enough to get out of bed! No one else!"
Lan's eyes widen in shock. This sounded dangerously like… He turned his head to the left and groaned when he noticed that the bed was empty. "Moiraine!", he hissed through gritted teeth.
"I don't know if I should be happy that there are other people, who have the same problem with her as I have." Nynaeve sounded exhausted, but Lan noticed the small hint of a smile on her lips.
Quickly, the warder got on his feet and bowed to the old woman. "I apologize for her behavior. Sometimes, she can be… very stubborn."
"Why do you apologize?", Mother Fiosä asked confused "You're not better than her. You would have slept in front of my cottage just to be near her. You two must be bonded for many, many years."
"We are."
"Well, in that case, maybe she will listen to you. Go and knock some sense into this Aes Sedai. Getting one full night of sleep doesn't make up for the weeks she hasn't been sleeping."
Grumbling, Mother Fiosä returned to her herbs, while Lan quickly left the cottage.
The warder found his Aes Sedai with their horses. She was lost in her thoughts, while she was softly striking over the nostrils of her horse.
"You had to make her angry, hadn't you?"
Surprised, her eyes found him, but when she saw his reproachful gaze, she turned her head back to the horse. "This woman was overreacting. I just wanted to walk a little bit."
"Yesterday, you were barely able to stand on your own two feet."
"I'm always a little bit shaken after I'm returning from my glorious journey to Rand's dreamworld. But I was able to sleep last night and I feel better now."
"Still, you two are bonded and this doesn't just go away." This time, she didn't answer and kept striking her horse. Lan sighed, then he moved closer to her. He pulled out her golden serpent ring, which he had kept hidden since they had met Tarin and his men, and took her left hand into his.
When Moiraine saw the ring, her first reaction was to pull back her hand, but Lan's grip was strong. Gently, he placed it back on her middle finger, where it belonged. "I'm not an Aes Sedai anymore. Not without the One Power." Her voice was only a whisper and Lan could hear the pain in it. Although he couldn't feel her anymore, he knew that she was actually believing what she was saying. He took her hand and placed it over his heart.
"You are my Aes Sedai. I swore to protect you from any danger coming your way and I will do it until the day I die."
"Don't say that." Now, the pain was visible on her face. Even the simple thought of losing him… Luckily, Lan knew exactly what she needed. One more step and his strong arms were around her and held her close to him. She didn't cry, but she needed his strength to regain her composure.
When she was sure that her mask was back in place and that her voice wouldn't betray her, she asked: "Where is Nynaeve?"
"Still with Mother Fiosä, I suppose. She was thrilled that someone else was just as annoyed with you as she is sometimes."
Moiraine chuckled when she imagined the picture in her mind of a happy Nynaeve drinking tea with Mother Fiosä while debating over Moiraine. "I bet she was." Then the picture turned and she saw Nynaeve and Lan lying sleeping on the floor. Two lovers, who were holding each other. Again, she felt this stupid jealousy in her heart. "You two look cute together. You really should reconsider if you don't…"
"Finish this sentence, and I will throw you over my shoulder and dump you into the nearest pond.", Lan growled. Why did she always have to start with this? He thought he had made it clear where his loyalty lay. "Do you want me to be mad at you?"
"I just want you to…"
"No, I won't break my oath to you. So, never mention it again." The warder released his Aes Sedai, only to throw her over his shoulder. Moiraine shrieked in surprise, but there was nothing she could do about it.
"What are you doing?! I didn't finish the sentence!"
"Which is the reason, why I'm not throwing you into a pond. But Mother Fiosä wants to take another look at you, and I agree with her."
"And I can't use my own feet because…"
"You would never come willingly."
"Put me down, Lan!"
"Not gonna happen."
"Lan!" The warder smiled, when she was banging her small hands on his back, without even actually trying to hurt him. So, he allowed her to work on his back, while he was walking back to mother Fiosä's cottage.
When Lan opened the door of the cottage, he found Mother Fiosä and Nynaeve gathering around the table and talking about herbs. Meanwhile, Rand lay on his bed and was obviously bored, which changed quickly when Lan entered the cottage with an angry Moiraine.
As soon as the door was closed behind him, the warder placed his Aes Sedai back on her feet and was rewarded with a shove to the chest. Moiraine tried to pass Lan, but he blocked the door, and she wasn't able to move the big man.
"At least there is one person, who can handle you." Angry, Moiraine turned to Mother Fiosä, who was pouring tea into some cups.
"What do you want from me?"
"I want to know how this bond between you and Rand was formed. Maybe this way, we will find a solution how to break it."
"Trust me, it won't help.", Moiraine said and crossed her arms.
Mother Fiosä threw an empty cup at the Aes Sedai, which was caught thanks to Lan's quick reflexes. Moiraine didn't even flinch. "Only Aes Sedai can create a bond! And I'm pretty sure that you didn't do it since you are suffering from this connection just like Rand does! So, cut the crap and tell me who did this to you?!"
The old and the younger woman stared at each other, but otherwise, there was no word spoken. Lan, Nynaeve, and Rand just waited for the moment when one of those two would explode. And since they knew Moiraine's stoic side, their bets were on the old woman.
Another empty cup flew through the air and was again caught by Lan. "Fine! Don't tell me! But this bond won't disappear! Since you're an Aes Sedai, why don't you break the bond?!"
"I can't."
"And I assume that you won't tell me why!"
"This bond is really strong. One Aes Sedai won't be enough to break it. We will need the help of my sisters."
"No!" Finally, Rand stood up as well. "I'm not going back to Tar Valon! I won't be a puppet to the Aes Sedai!"
"You're not a puppet, Rand.", Moiraine explained calmly.
A sarcastically laugh escaped the lips of the boy. "I don't believe you. You and your sisters would like to have an eye on me. This way, you can control me. But this won't happen."
"What is your suggestion then? Don't break the bond? My presence keeps the Dark One out of your dreams, but do you really want me to sleep next to you for the rest of your life?"
Angry, Rand gritted his teeth. This was a terrible imagination. Although he had known her now for a few months, he didn't trust Moiraine completely. She had too many secrets and was always careful with her words. Sure, she was probably better than the rest of her sisters, but still… he wanted to stay as far away as possible from the White Tower and the Aes Sedai.
"You can go back to the White Tower and then your sisters…!"
"We both have to be present. Otherwise, they won't be able to break the bond."
"Which is really convenient for you, don't you think?! You can have an eye on me, and as soon as your sister arrives, I will be surrounded and can't escape the Aes Sedai anymore!"
Slowly, Moiraine's stoic mask was moving and her anger was shown. Although she tried to keep her voice as calm as possible, she couldn't hide the slight hint of anger in it. "For the last time, you're not a puppet."
"And I don't believe you!"
"I can't lie!"
"ENOUGH!" Mother Fiosä stepped between the two and pushed Rand – who had moved closer to Moiraine with every sentence – back to the bed. "You both need to calm down."
Moiraine turned around, but Lan was still blocking the door. "You calm down in here!", the old woman accented louder "Your bodies need to rest. So, give them the time."
The Aes Sedai and her warder fought another battle with their eyes until Moiraine gave up and moved to the bed, which the old woman had given her. At moments like this, she missed the One Power the most.