Chapter 5.
If He Will Let You Get That Far. . .
Severus awoke suddenly. The room was cold, and the sheet of the bed had slid of his back. In a kind of shocked, horrified daze he recalled the night before. He closed his eyes again. What the hell had he been thinking? It couldn't be real. It could not. . .Draco sighed in his sleep. Severus cast a panicked glance at the clock on the sideboard. Five in the morning. Thank the gods for that at least. . .If anyone found out. . .Hesitantly, he put his hand on Draco's shoulder. The boy wriggled slightly. Severus shook him awake, softly, but insistently. Finally he came round, and yawned. "Wha'. . .?" He stared at his teacher. Snape grimaced. "I know. I know! You've got to get up. . .get back to your dorm, before they all wake up." "I can't believe. . ." started Draco, the realisation reviving him into wakefulness. "Nor can I. Forget about it. We MUST forget about it, you understand? If Dumbledore finds out. . .I'll lose my job that's for sure. But you mustn't say a word to anyone!" He said, pulling himself upright. "Yeah, I know, " answered Draco, and shivered. The fire had long since burnt down. He climbed from under the sheet and started to dress himself, as Snape went through a door that Draco assumed must be the bathroom. Last night. . .he could only remember bits of it. He didn't strain to remember more. What had possessed him?! So, he had always been. . .attracted to the Potions Master, but to. . . he shivered slightly, though if it was because of the cold or his thoughts, he didn't know. He sorted through a pile of discarded clothes and found his socks. Pulling them on, he thought started thinking about Snape. It explained a lot, really. Why he was unmarried, unattached. . . he wondered whether his father had known. He dismissed the thought from his mind. He didn't want to think of his father, or what he would have said if he ever found out about him and. . .last night. Insane. Truly insane, to do such a thing. . .He pulled his robes over his head, and remembered how easily Snape had undone the fastenings. Strange, really, since his robes were unique, made by the family tailor. He saw his shoes at the side of the bed. He went to retrieve them. He took them to the fireside, and sat where he had sat the night before, and started to do them up. Would Crabbe and Goyle have stayed up this late for him? Probably. He would say he was talking to Snape. Which was nearly the truth, anyway. They should have fallen asleep by now, anyhow. Hopefully, he could just creep past them, if they were in the common room, and slip up to the dorm. What lessons did he have today? He pulled his time table out of the pocket in his robes. . .Defence Against Dark Arts, Care For Magical Creatures, Potions. . .Potions! His heart sank. He would just have to pretend it never happened. Yeah, right. Snape came back into the room, wearing a bathrobe. As Draco looked at him, he noticed again how attractive his teacher really was; tall, mysterious, strong. . .independent, clever. . .he stopped himself. This was not the way to think if he was going to pretend nothing had happened. . . "Are you alright?" Severus asked. "Yeah. . .just tired, I suppose, " he said, a little shyly. Snape gave a brief grin. "To be expected, if you've been awake all night." Draco blushed and grinned slightly. Snape became serious. "Remember, tell no-one. There's a lot at stake. My job, reputation. . .your reputation, which is much more important, your place here at Hogwarts, amongst various other things. If anyone asks where you were, you were talking to me, here, right? They won't mind that. The news about Lucius will be in the morning paper, I can guarantee. " He paused. "Don't worry, sir, I'll be fine, " Draco reassured him. It was dark in the room, and he couldn't make out Snape's expression, but he could have sworn that he saw. . . guilt? Surely not! Trick of the half light. Must be. "Good. Ignore what they say. Watch out for Potter and his little gang, they would forget this for a long time. Granger might try and stop him and Weasley, but they'll be there, making life hell, as ever," he said and fleeting trace of guilt hidden. "I'll be fine. Can I. . .can I still come and talk to you sometimes, sir?" He asked, words rushing out. All Slytherin pupils could come and talk to Snape whenever they wanted. To his relief, Snape's face relaxed into a slow smile. "Of course. Not too often, or rumours will start. But yes, of course you may." Draco smiled back. Both seemed reluctant to leave. Eventually, Snape broke the silence, and said, "You'd better get back. Try and get some sleep." Draco nodded and rose from the chair. "Thank you, professor," he said, and let himself from the room. He walked through Snape's office, still feeling Snape's eyes watching his retreating back go out of the door. Closing the Office door gently, he walked slowly towards the Slytherin common room, keeping in the shadows, buried in thoughts. The picture of Severus - no, Snape, dammit, Snape- standing in front of the bathroom door, wearing a bathrobe, was firmly implanted in his head, and not leaving, what ever he tried to think. Eventually, he reached the entrance to the common room. Murmuring the password, he silently entered into the dark, cold room. As he had guessed, his faithful sidekicks were asleep by the fireplace, snoring peacefully. He left them there. He would say that he got back earlier, and they were both asleep then as well. He crept to his dorm, undressed and collapsed on his bed. He lay there, thinking. Why had Snape let him do that? Had he wanted to, or was he carried away on the moment? And that letter. That bloody letter. Where was it? He rolled over, and hauled his robes up of the floor again, and searched the pockets. It wasn't there. Damn! It must have dropped out in Snape's bedroom. He tried to remember it the best he could. What had his Father written about Snape? Ah, yes, he remembered. . . " he is a wonderful man underneath. . .if he will let you get that far. . ." Draco smiled, and, against all probability, fell asleep.
If He Will Let You Get That Far. . .
Severus awoke suddenly. The room was cold, and the sheet of the bed had slid of his back. In a kind of shocked, horrified daze he recalled the night before. He closed his eyes again. What the hell had he been thinking? It couldn't be real. It could not. . .Draco sighed in his sleep. Severus cast a panicked glance at the clock on the sideboard. Five in the morning. Thank the gods for that at least. . .If anyone found out. . .Hesitantly, he put his hand on Draco's shoulder. The boy wriggled slightly. Severus shook him awake, softly, but insistently. Finally he came round, and yawned. "Wha'. . .?" He stared at his teacher. Snape grimaced. "I know. I know! You've got to get up. . .get back to your dorm, before they all wake up." "I can't believe. . ." started Draco, the realisation reviving him into wakefulness. "Nor can I. Forget about it. We MUST forget about it, you understand? If Dumbledore finds out. . .I'll lose my job that's for sure. But you mustn't say a word to anyone!" He said, pulling himself upright. "Yeah, I know, " answered Draco, and shivered. The fire had long since burnt down. He climbed from under the sheet and started to dress himself, as Snape went through a door that Draco assumed must be the bathroom. Last night. . .he could only remember bits of it. He didn't strain to remember more. What had possessed him?! So, he had always been. . .attracted to the Potions Master, but to. . . he shivered slightly, though if it was because of the cold or his thoughts, he didn't know. He sorted through a pile of discarded clothes and found his socks. Pulling them on, he thought started thinking about Snape. It explained a lot, really. Why he was unmarried, unattached. . . he wondered whether his father had known. He dismissed the thought from his mind. He didn't want to think of his father, or what he would have said if he ever found out about him and. . .last night. Insane. Truly insane, to do such a thing. . .He pulled his robes over his head, and remembered how easily Snape had undone the fastenings. Strange, really, since his robes were unique, made by the family tailor. He saw his shoes at the side of the bed. He went to retrieve them. He took them to the fireside, and sat where he had sat the night before, and started to do them up. Would Crabbe and Goyle have stayed up this late for him? Probably. He would say he was talking to Snape. Which was nearly the truth, anyway. They should have fallen asleep by now, anyhow. Hopefully, he could just creep past them, if they were in the common room, and slip up to the dorm. What lessons did he have today? He pulled his time table out of the pocket in his robes. . .Defence Against Dark Arts, Care For Magical Creatures, Potions. . .Potions! His heart sank. He would just have to pretend it never happened. Yeah, right. Snape came back into the room, wearing a bathrobe. As Draco looked at him, he noticed again how attractive his teacher really was; tall, mysterious, strong. . .independent, clever. . .he stopped himself. This was not the way to think if he was going to pretend nothing had happened. . . "Are you alright?" Severus asked. "Yeah. . .just tired, I suppose, " he said, a little shyly. Snape gave a brief grin. "To be expected, if you've been awake all night." Draco blushed and grinned slightly. Snape became serious. "Remember, tell no-one. There's a lot at stake. My job, reputation. . .your reputation, which is much more important, your place here at Hogwarts, amongst various other things. If anyone asks where you were, you were talking to me, here, right? They won't mind that. The news about Lucius will be in the morning paper, I can guarantee. " He paused. "Don't worry, sir, I'll be fine, " Draco reassured him. It was dark in the room, and he couldn't make out Snape's expression, but he could have sworn that he saw. . . guilt? Surely not! Trick of the half light. Must be. "Good. Ignore what they say. Watch out for Potter and his little gang, they would forget this for a long time. Granger might try and stop him and Weasley, but they'll be there, making life hell, as ever," he said and fleeting trace of guilt hidden. "I'll be fine. Can I. . .can I still come and talk to you sometimes, sir?" He asked, words rushing out. All Slytherin pupils could come and talk to Snape whenever they wanted. To his relief, Snape's face relaxed into a slow smile. "Of course. Not too often, or rumours will start. But yes, of course you may." Draco smiled back. Both seemed reluctant to leave. Eventually, Snape broke the silence, and said, "You'd better get back. Try and get some sleep." Draco nodded and rose from the chair. "Thank you, professor," he said, and let himself from the room. He walked through Snape's office, still feeling Snape's eyes watching his retreating back go out of the door. Closing the Office door gently, he walked slowly towards the Slytherin common room, keeping in the shadows, buried in thoughts. The picture of Severus - no, Snape, dammit, Snape- standing in front of the bathroom door, wearing a bathrobe, was firmly implanted in his head, and not leaving, what ever he tried to think. Eventually, he reached the entrance to the common room. Murmuring the password, he silently entered into the dark, cold room. As he had guessed, his faithful sidekicks were asleep by the fireplace, snoring peacefully. He left them there. He would say that he got back earlier, and they were both asleep then as well. He crept to his dorm, undressed and collapsed on his bed. He lay there, thinking. Why had Snape let him do that? Had he wanted to, or was he carried away on the moment? And that letter. That bloody letter. Where was it? He rolled over, and hauled his robes up of the floor again, and searched the pockets. It wasn't there. Damn! It must have dropped out in Snape's bedroom. He tried to remember it the best he could. What had his Father written about Snape? Ah, yes, he remembered. . . " he is a wonderful man underneath. . .if he will let you get that far. . ." Draco smiled, and, against all probability, fell asleep.