The Gift

Chapter Two - It's Just Not Normal

"I can't believe I'm doing this," Monica said to herself as she sat, alone, on the examining table in her doctor's office. She and Chandler had spent the last three months discussing the whole situation, going through numerous doctor's appointments, and coming to terms with the fact that they were actually going to have a baby together. Now, after everything had been sorted out and they were truly ready to go through with it, it was the day that they had been waiting for.

Monica literally twiddled her thumbs as she sat there, waiting impatiently. She thought it was her doctor when there was a knock on the door and someone entered.

"Chandler," she said, a little surprised. "I thought you were at work. I mean, haven't you already...done your part?" she blushed.

"I was, and I have," he replied, also blushing a little. "But I didn't want to miss this." She smiled weakly at him, and he began to wonder if coming was such a good idea. "Do you want me to leave? I won't stay if you're uncomfortable with me in here when they start the procedure. I just thought I should be here for you - for moral support, I guess."

"I'm glad you came," she said quietly, with tears beginning to flow down her cheeks. "I wanted you to be here."

"Hey, I'll always be here for you," he promised and took her hand in his. "Anything you need, all you've got to do is ask." He gently wiped away her tears and kissed her forehead. "Please don't cry, Mon. I hate to see you upset."

"I'm not upset. I'm just so scared, Chandler," she finally admitted. "This is it. In a few minutes, I could be pregnant. I've always wanted it - and I still do - but it's a scary thought."

"Are you sure you want to do this? It's not too late to back out if you've changed your mind," Chandler reminded her. "I want this, Monica, but you're the one who has to go through the pregnancy and the delivery. I'm basically just sitting on the sidelines while you suffer," he laughed lightly.

"I do want this. I really do. It's just... I don't know. It seems so clinical. Please don't take this the wrong way, Chandler, but I thought that I'd be doing this with someone I was in love with - someone I was going to spend the rest of my life with. I love you, Chandler, but I'm not in love with you."

"I know," he said quietly. "If you don't think it's right, Mon, you don't have to do it. I don't want you to regret this in any way. I'm sure you'll find the man of your dreams out there somewhere, and you deserve that. Maybe you should just wait for him to have a baby."

Monica couldn't help but notice the hint of sadness in his voice. He really did want this. Over the past couple of months, she'd had doubts in the back of her mind about the whole situation. The look in his eyes and the tone of his voice at that very moment told her that she could push her doubts aside. "Who needs a dream guy? I'll stick with you," she teased and brushed a few more tears from her cheek. "I'm kidding, Chandler. You're going to make some woman very happy someday... But until then, what do you say about having a baby with me?"

He immediately brightened up and hugged her tightly. "I wouldn't mind making you happy, Mon," he whispered.

She didn't speak for a moment, then gently pushed him away to look into his eyes. "You are making me happy," she said quietly.

Knock! Knock!

"Are we ready to get started?" Dr. Collins asked when she entered the room.

Monica looked up at Chandler, then reached out to take his hand. "Yeah. We're ready."

==========

"I can't believe you're doing this," Ross said for what must have been the millionth time since Monica and Chandler had told them about their plan to have a baby together.

"Ross, stop being such a baby. I think it's sweet," Rachel responded and smiled over at Chandler and Monica who were sitting together in the armchair in the living room of Monica's apartment.

"Good things will come of this," Phoebe added knowingly.

"So when are you gonna know if...well, if it worked?" Joey asked curiously. "It was three days ago, right?"

"Yeah," Monica replied. "I went in for some tests this morning. The doctor said it could still be early, but I couldn't wait any longer. And Chandler wouldn't let me take a pregnancy test." She glared at him.

"I'm sorry. I just didn't want to see a negative result, be disappointed, and then find out that it was wrong. That's too much to worry about," he reasoned.

"And this isn't?" she asked, referring to the waiting. "I can't stand not knowing."

"They're supposed to call soon," he reminded her. "Just be patient."

Ring!

"The phone!" Chandler exclaimed and watched as Monica jumped up from the chair to answer it.

"Hello?" she said excitedly. "Yes, this is Monica Geller...Right...Really? Are you sure about that? I mean, I...Yes, I understand that...Okay...I will...Thank you." She hung up the phone and sat back down with Chandler.

"Well? Was it the doctor?" he asked anxiously. He couldn't quite read her expression. "What did she say?"


"She said that I'm not pregnant," Monica replied quietly.

"Oh, honey, I'm sorry," Rachel said and got up to hug her friend.

"I thought you said good things were gonna happen, Pheebs," Joey complained.

"I did. And I'm never wrong," Phoebe defended herself.

"Well, it's still early, right?" Chandler asked. "I mean, that doesn't mean you won't be pregnant, right Pheebs? You did this once."

"You're right," she replied. "It could still happen, Mon. Don't worry about it."

"You're right," Monica sighed. "Guess I just have to wait a little longer, huh? I've waited for forty years. Might as well keep it up," she said and leaned against Chandler. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head.

"Screw in vitro fertilization," Phoebe said as she stood. "You guys might as well just go ahead and do it yourselves. You two act like a couple all the time anyway. You might as well go ahead and try out the sex. You might like it," she grinned and walked out the door.

"Hey, Pheebs!" Joey called, rushing out the door behind her. "Wanna come over to my place? We can try out the sex, too!"

"Okay, sex, Chandler, and my sister just don't do anything for me. Let's go, Rach," Ross said and held out his hand for his wife. "We have to pick up the baby anyway." As they were walking out the door, he stopped and turned back to Chandler. "You'd better not listen to Phoebe," he warned and shut the door as he left.

Chandler looked down at Monica who was beginning to cry into his chest. "Hey. What's wrong?" he asked worriedly.

"Do you really have to ask?" she responded. "I'm not pregnant, Chandler. I really can't do anything right, can I?"

"What do you mean?" he asked, unsure about what she was referring to.

"I'm forty years old, Chandler, and I haven't done anything with my life. I'm just a chef. That's it. Not a wife, not a mother. I can't find a man to spend my life with, and now I can't even get pregnant. I can't do anything right."

"Monica, don't say that. First of all, it's still early. You could be pregnant. Just give it a little more time. Secondly, you've done a lot with your life. Look at all the people who love you, Mon. That's all that really matters."

==========

Two weeks later, Monica was still not pregnant, and the doctor had informed her that she wouldn't be this time around. She and Chandler were still trying to decide what to do next.

"Maybe we should just drop the whole thing," Monica sighed. "I guess it just wasn't meant for us to have a baby together."

"Don't say that," Chandler responded. "We'd make great parents together. Let's try it one more time," he insisted.

"Chandler, this is really expensive. Do you really want to put up that much money for another failure? Even if it did work, we'd both be broke. We wouldn't be able to raise the baby after that."

He was silent for a moment, as if he were thinking about something important. "Maybe we should take Phoebe's advice," he suggested.

"Phoebe's advice? What are you -? Oh..." Monica looked shocked.

"Sorry. Shouldn't have said that," Chandler laughed nervously. He had only been half serious. It was supposed to be a joke.

"No, Chandler. It's just... That's a really big deal. Even bigger than having a baby together."

"I know... But if we're going to have a baby together, we're going to have to make one. Why not do it the normal way?"

"That's what I mean. It's just not normal," she answered. "I think you're losing it, Chandler."

"Come on. It's just me." He was teasing, but a part of him really wouldn't have objected to the whole thing.

She hesitated before answering. "Okay. Let's do it."

"What?!" he exclaimed. He certainly hadn't expected her to agree.

"Hey! You're the one that brought the whole thing up," she reminded him. She got up from her spot on the couch and sat down with him in the armchair. "Come on, Chandler. It wouldn't kill you, would it?"

"Are you seriously saying that you would have sex with me?"

"Why not?" she said quietly and slowly leaned in to place a gentle kiss on his lips. She was surprised when he returned the kiss.

He couldn't believe what they were doing. "Are you drunk?"

"No," she responded. "Completely sober... Wanna go to my room?" she asked nervously.

"What?"

"Do you want to go to my room? The bed would be much more comfortable than this chair or the couch, trust me."

"Monica, are you sure you want to do this? I want you to be absolutely positive," he said.

"I am," she assured him. "Do you want to do this?" she asked.

"I've wanted to make love to you for a long time," he admitted and kissed her again.

"Really?" she asked between kisses.

"Absolutely," he whispered and kissed her again. He was a little surprised when she pushed him away.

"I can't do this," she sighed and jumped up from her spot on his lap.

"Oh... Okay," Chandler said, disappointed. "I understand."

"It's just too weird, Chandler. We can't. We can't do this... Let's try the in vitro one more time, and see what happens."

"All right. That sounds like a good plan," he agreed. "Um... I should probably get going. Leave you alone for awhile."

"Okay," Monica replied and followed him as he walked to the door. "Chandler."

He stopped and turned to face her. "Yeah?"

She walked over to meet him and wrapped her arms around him. "Thank you for understanding - and for being such a wonderful friend."

"No problem," he smiled. "Anything for you, Mon."