Temper the Soul
Chapter 18
By Zapenstap
Relena brushed his hair from his forehead while he slept, smoothing the unruly locks away from his face as sunlight filtered in through the windows and splayed across their bed. She lay on her stomach beside him, her legs sticking out from under the sheets, supporting herself on her elbows. Heero lay on his back, close but not touching her, one hand relaxed over his chest, breathing quietly. She wasn't sure he was really asleep as she smiled at him and smoothed the skin on his forehead with her thumb. He certainly had to be worn out after what followed when he woke her with persistent, ardent kisses on her neck in the middle of the night. He was Heero Yuy, but she had always been conscious of his weaknesses, of his humanity; it's what she first loved about him.
He opened his eyes, deep blue, almond-shaped eyes, and stirred under the sheets. Ever the stoic soldier, nothing in his expression changed as he laid eyes upon her, but she could sense his thoughts. Smiling, she kissed him softly. His hand wrapped around the side of her head as he kissed back and when he smiled heaved herself up to snuggle against him, burying her head in the crook between his shoulder and neck. He held her gently, rubbing her back and kissing the side of her face.
"Good morning," he said.
"Good morning."
He kissed her again and sat up, pulling her into his lap, the sheets tangled about her legs the only thing dividing their bodies in all the necessary places. Pushing the hair out of her eyes, he smiled at her and kissed her on the mouth. She rocked from the force of it, smiling into the kiss. "I won't be gone long," he told her as he pulled away.
She sighed, sobering up. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she hugged him so tightly her arm dangled most of the way down his back. Leaning against him, she listened to his heart beat in his chest, a soft and steady pump. "I don't want you to be gone from me, but I understand you have to go and I know you can fight."
"Relena…"
She lifted her head to look him in the face. "Did you ever think it would be this way?" She remembered when she first met him, of everything that had happened since then, how strange it all was. To think that the young, dedicated soldier she had met on the beach was now in a bed with her, his body and soul a part of her. His eyes were still the same, frightening when they were focused, but the way he held her, looked at her… She kissed him. "Do you know how much I love you? You mean so much to me. You always have. I…"
He put a finger over her lips, shushing her. "I'll be fine. Nothing will happen to me."
She pressed her teeth down on his finger lightly. "It had better not," she said with a smile.
He rubbed his cheeks over her shoulders and shifted her in his lap. Laughing, she kissed his neck and rubbed the back of his head affectionately as he fell back against the headboard with her on top of him and nothing but a sheet between.
"Heero…"
"I wish there was more time," he half-laughed, and shook his head. "I'm so happy I…"
Her heart thudded in her ears and she fell over his chest, kissing him again, trapping him against the bed. Her mouth found his and they kissed, their tongues meeting almost from the first. He began breathing a little heavily, but seemed too sated and happy to become aroused again so soon.
"It's yesterday," she breathed. "Don't go. There's lots of time."
Grinning, he tickled her and she laughed, rolling off of him and falling on the bed beside him. He smiled and rolled over on his side, facing her. "I don't want to go," he said with a more serious expression, wrapping one arm around her stomach, "but I have to."
"I know."
He kissed her forehead and then her mouth. "I love you."
"Heero…"
"You make me happy."
"I love you too." She stared into his eyes, amazed at how large they seemed at that moment. "God only knows how much."
He kissed her again and got out of bed.
*****
Audrey waited with Terese at the bottom of the stairs, arrayed in a formal white and gold dress, a form-fitting gown modestly and elegantly cut. She wasn't the only one dressed up. Neither was she the most decadent. The entire Court had turned out for Prince Damion's departure, lines of noble lords and ladies standing in rows at the bottom of the stairs. Scattered among them were members of the press, city officials, members of the palace staff and invited guests. Camera lights from the reporters flashed constantly. News of Prince Damion's departure had been openly released this morning. It was said people had flocked to the airport already, waiting to see him off. Public opinion was positive. They wanted Prince Damion to bring the soldiers home.
Audrey took note or who was present in the palace and who had come with who absently, storing away the information to be analyzed later, but her eyes and her mind were focused mostly on Damion himself.
He stood at the top of the stairs with the head Lords of the Council, dressed all in sharp black from head to toe, his coat cross buttoned across his chest and lightly embroidered with silver thread. His eyes blazed. He wore his circlet on his head, the silver one, and both the nation's emblem and his personal seal were embroidered on the lapels of his coat. Alice Millimant, Lady of Wentenshore and Lord Garret Iselin of Northfield conversed with him quietly, standing to either side of him with their personal servants a few steps behind on the side of the stairs. Manny was with the other servants, watching Damion a little, but mostly making faces at Terese.
Audrey watched Damion. Her whole body felt so strange, weak and strong in intervals. Her pulse was quick, her breathing irregular; sometimes she even felt something similar to nausea. He had an ability to pull a princely countenance out of nowhere when it was called for, though she knew he behaved casual and personal with her and the closest members of his staff. She loved him for it. It was crazy, absolutely crazy, but she had not slept well last night for this sudden love of him. She had dreamed of him awake and asleep.
It had come so quickly. Hearing him tell her he loved her, saying it back… When she woke up this morning she knew the world had changed. He looked very much like a Prince to her eyes today, possessed of his faculties, handsome, confident and generous in his smiles. His smiles made her heart leap. She couldn't rid her mind of him. He was all over her. He seemed to be everywhere at once. More than anything she wanted to be alone with him right now, why she couldn't really say, but she wanted to be alone with him.
It was not to be. He could not take time now to see her privately. The kissing and talking they had done last night would have to be enough. It was sweet torture that she languished as she thought she never would and yet couldn't tell him she did. She would have to write it in a letter. She couldn't remember how long he had kissed her last night, or even how it had begun once she had emptied her heart to him, but she had gone to bed shaking from it. God, she didn't know he could plunge his tongue so deeply into her mouth for so long, much less that she would like it. Even now her breathing hadn't quite returned to normal when she thought of him. It wasn't that she had even really thought much about it at the time; she had just accepted it, lost herself in his attention. He had put his hands on her waist and didn't move them an inch the whole while he kissed her. God, what kisses they were.
"Are you all right?" Terese asked her, putting a hand on her arm and smiling at her with one of those sweet, girlish smiles of hers, dark eyes twinkling. "I've never seen you look at him like that."
Audrey eased the crease her brow and relaxed her features, but she couldn't erase the small, closed-lipped smile from her face. She was so frightened of this, of this gross sway of emotion, of this shakiness in her heart. She was afraid it would end badly, that it would break her as it did her family, but she couldn't mend the floodgate now. He was like an addictive drug she had taken without understanding the consequences. She hoped it would last, even though she was afraid of it.
Damion descended the stairs with a smile and looked straight ahead as the lines of people waiting for him pulled back, everyone bowing and curtseying politely, though he wasn't king yet. Audrey was nearest the stairs and curtseyed as she was able in her dress. He turned his head to look at her as he passed, which he shouldn't, though he kept walking. She felt his eyes graze across her and shivered, lifting her head to meet his face for an instant. His expression made her heart pump at twice its usual rate. Motion seemed to slow as she rose from her curtsey with the others, her eyes glued to his, absorbed by their depth and liquid texture. The emotion in them reminded her of tears without being anything like tears at all. Whatever it was stunned her. All she could hear was the sound of her own heart beating, and maybe his too. But before anything could be done, if indeed, there was anything to do, he had passed beyond her place and out the main doors, his expression reverting back to normal the second he looked away. At the door he was immediately surrounded by an entourage of soldiers and servants, men hand-picked by Damion himself, charged to escort him to the airport, guard him in the West and return him safely home.
Manny had followed along behind. He stopped a moment and lifted Terese off the ground in a huge hug. She yelped and laughed, hugging him back. "Bye," he said, grinning and kissing her cheek as he set her down. "And don't worry," he whispered with a wink, "he'll be back in time for the wedding!"
"He'd better be!" Terese scolded him, and then kissed him discreetly. She bit her lip as he released her, turned, ran and shouldered his way between the guards to the center of the entourage.
In a brief moment they were all gone.
As soon as the palace doors closed behind Damion, Audrey was surrounded by a swarm of reporters. Camera light flashed in her face and voices buzzed up in her ears.
"First Choice! Your reaction to this development…"
"Miss Veron, do you have any worries over…?"
She stared after him in silence for a moment, unconsciously ignoring the posed questions, listening to pounding of her heart and the rush in her ears, but slowly she blinked out of her trance and turned to charm the media on her future husband's behalf.
*****
Heero arrived at Preventor Headquarters at nine o'clock sharp. He strolled in wearing jeans, a new green tank top and the preventor's jacket he was given as a courtesy after the fall of Mariemaia all those years ago. But his mind was elsewhere.
"Heero," Lady Une said, leaning over the desk and stack of reports. "Glad you're here and looking your usual self," she said with a smile. He took that to mean he wasn't smiling, blank faced and confident as they were all used to seeing him. He was glad because in fact his mind was somewhere else entirely. "How is Zechs?" she asked. "I heard you were in Taravren with Relena when he crashed there."
"Yeah. He'll survive, but he's not coming."
Lady Une nodded, leafing through the papers. "Do you want to know what happened or have you already discovered it on your own?"
She was smiling at him again, but no, he hadn't even thought about hacking into the Preventor's database to research the reasons for Zech's fall. Everything since then was Relena. "Why don't you just tell me anyway?"
Lady Une smiled at him and sat on the edge of the desk, crossing her legs. "Gardiner, or whoever is running his defense, was told to shoot down any military aircraft that crossed over the Amarat perimeter."
Amarat. That was the imaginary line between the territory under Gardiner's control and the territory being held by peacekeeping forces, named after the rocky plains that stretched over the area.
"So they just shot down him down?"
"They knew who he was," Lady Une said. "They shot him near Taravren borders and retreated. Preventor Wind had to crash-land the plane. Being an expert pilot he was able to do it without harming himself or any civilians, but he was still incredibly lucky."
"What do you want me to do?"
Her expression became more serious. "What do you want to do, Heero? We need help everywhere. Wufei and Sally are holding the cities on the east side of the Amarat. Duo is lost on the west side. Trowa, Quatre and have volunteered to be among the instrumental scouting troops that are going to break through the perimeter and gather up the soldiers trapped out there if they can."
"How will they organize them?"
"The leaders will be making a statement. Those who will be doing this will be the ones to relay it, audio and visual. But it's a risky thing. We could lose all of you. I'm not going to ask you to do that."
All he wanted was to go home, but this was important, too important to be trusted to just anybody. The other gundam pilots he trusted, but… "I'll go," he said, crossing his arms. "Where are Trowa and Quatre?"
"They're boarding the plane now."
So this was it. Heero drew his gun from waistband and turned it over in his hands. He stared at it for a moment, feeling how black and heavy it was. It had been a long time since he had used it.
"I know," Lady Une said quietly, intruding in on his thoughts with a soft voice. "I know you thought it was over."
He put the gun away, tucking it behind his back and under his coat. "Let's just do what needs to be done."
In ten minutes he found himself on a military jet full of soldiers, some talking and joking and others blank faced. Quatre and Trowa were sitting together in the corner, separate from most everyone else. Trowa sat with his back to him, arms crossed over his chest. Quatre had his hands on his knees, turning his head to look out the window. He looked up when Heero approached.
"Heero," the blonde pilot said with a welcoming smile.
"Hey," Trowa said softly, not turning. "Have a seat."
Heero sat down and said nothing.
"How have things been with you?" Quatre asked with a smile. "How is Relena?"
Heero replied absently, not really seeing him. "We're both fine."
Quatre blinked. Trowa raised an eyebrow, though he didn't move. "Oh yeah?"
Heero stared out the window as the plane took off, staring back at Cinq, at the house that became visible as they rose higher, the house they were flying away from.
Leaving him alone, Trowa and Quatre engaged in conversation about their job and he listened with an attentive ear even as he thought about his wife waiting for him at home alone. He rested his hand on his knee and stared at the ring on his finger, remembering standing at the altar yesterday and feeling suddenly weak in the head.
*****
It was near evening when Audrey had enough of the commotion and retired to her rooms, conscious of how strange and lonely the palace seemed. Sighing, she sat down at a small marble table and rested her head on her arms. Her head and heart still buzzed with him. She felt drained in every respect.
After a minute there came a knock at the door. Terese popped her head in. "Audrey?"
"Terese," she breathed, sitting up. "Come in, please."
The bright-eyed and raven-haired palace manager joined her, sitting in the chair across from the table. "We just got word from the Prince Damion. He arrived in his guard tower safely."
God, he was there already. She tried to calm herself down, tried not to think of the implications, of his body being so far away, and in such a dangerous place. "Any other word from him?"
"Oh, I didn't talk to him personally. They've shut down instant communication through open channels. They have to encrypt everything they send out, for safety's sake."
She could already tell this waiting was going to give her nightmares. And if Damion was in a tower surrounded by guards, how was it with the people on the frontline, the people he was trying to bring home? What about the soldiers called in to retrieve them? "I worry about Relena," she told Terese. "Perhaps we could invite her back to stay here? Her brother is here too. He might as well stay. I can't imagine she can bare to wait this out alone."
"I'll call her," Terese said with a smile. "Perhaps Lucrezia Noin as well? Milliardo's wife?"
"Of course." Something occurred to her and she froze, turning around quickly. "Do I have the authority to request such a thing?"
Terese laughed and shrugged. "Well, you're not Queen of Taravren yet, but since Damion left the management of this place more or less in my control, I think it's pretty much all right to request whatever you want." She bit her lip suddenly. "I saw your face when he was leaving. Are you…?" she trailed off.
Audrey closed her eyes. "I think so," she said, and couldn't suppress a smile. She let her head fall into her hands helplessly.
Terese smile split her face. "God, I was wondering. People have been watching, the staff I mean. Everyone whispers about the two of you, hoping and waiting and wishing. They ask Manny and I all sorts of questions. We don't really tell them much and I won't say a word if you don't want your personal life publicized, but I had hoped..."
Audrey smiled at her. "Thank you, and everyone, for being patient with me."
"Yeah," Terese said. "I don't know. I figured it must be hard. You seem so sad most of the time, I thought maybe there was something, that there had to be something… I mean, you seem happiest when I see you with him, and yet…." She trailed off.
Audrey lowered her head, playing with her engagement ring. "Right now I almost wish the timing had been different. Two months of feeling this way when I can't see him…"
"Just a little test," Terese said quietly. "Sixty days or so. Nothing at all really."
Audrey nodded. "Sixty days."
Sixty days to keep loving him in his absence, a meager test of fortitude. And then the wedding, and the wedding night. She shivered and tried not to wonder about it too much. He was beautiful and she loved him, but there was still that apprehension there, that fear of his possession, of letting him have her fully, of the act itself, of old habits and fears. This feeling was such a new and fragile thing. Would it be easier to love him in his absence or would her love for him become distorted?
"This is hard," she breathed.
*****
Their landing was announced over the intercom. Taking a deep breath, Heero crossed his arms, trying to be more patient than he felt. He had been silent for the entire trip, strategizing the quickest, most efficient way of completing this mission with the least possible risk. He had never considered the latter before. He had changed a lot in some ways.
The plane landed in a hot a dusty desert territory. Still without conversation, Heero exited the plane with the others. He surveyed the territory shrewdly, noting the rocky outcropping and the long spans of flat, dusty plains and scraggly shrubs. A hot wind blew across the plain, ruffling his coat. He began to sweat in the heat as he considered the situation. There wasn't much natural water out here. Duo might be suffering if he was alone.
Almost in silence the soldiers from the plane were escorted to military off road jeeps and driven to the city without incident. On the way they were briefed and armed. Heero held onto his own gun, but he accepted a second silently, having tucked the first behind his back in the waistband of his pants, hiding it under his coat. The second he hid inside his boot.
Arriving at the city, they all climbed out of the van and waited in the streets in front of the international embassy. Guards lined the perimeters of the city with rifles in hand. Barbed wire covered the walls. The citizens were under marshal law for their own safety, confined to their homes. The part of the city that had once existed outside the old walls had been evacuated and pulled inside. A great deal of it had been burned to the ground by Gardiner's mob-like army.
Heero waited beside Trowa and Quatre until Wufei and Sally appeared and issued a slew of commands for the new recruits. Those soldiers dispersed to their barracks. Heero and the other gundam pilots ignored the orders to move out and waited until they were alone with Sally and Wufei.
"Let's go inside," Sally said at last. "We'll catch you up."
They followed Wufei and Sally into the building and up to a secured conference room. Wufei watched Heero with a slanted gaze, as if wondering what he was thinking about.
"When is this happening?" Trowa asked when they all sat down at the table. "I'm worried about Duo."
"Soon hopefully," Wufei growled. "We're going over the perimeter ahead of the main force to gather everyone, but everyone has to be briefed and some people need to be trained. There's a large group of our people trapped in the hills just south of Camadrie and scattered in the surrounding area. We hope Duo's with a group of them. From his reports, we pinpointed his location near there, but we can only hope."
"Is it possible he's in the city?"
"Yeah," Sally said. "But it's not much of a city. Gardiner's people have already occupied it and they haven't treated resistors well. If Duo's in there, he's in more danger than if he joined up with our soldiers in the hills, though they're both under fire."
"What's our success rate?" Quatre asked.
"I don't want to hear the numbers," Trowa said softly.
"With you guys?" Sally said, "High enough. But it's too bad the gundams are useless. It might have been easier, or at least less risky."
"For us maybe," Wufei said. "But there's not a lot of honor in that."
"No," Trowa said. "They're not in good shape anymore anyway and it's next to impossible to fight ground troops with something that large. People get desperate when backed into a corner. I'm afraid these people would just starting setting fires and exploding buildings with hostages if we came at them that way."
"So was Lady Une," Sally said softly.
"Let's just do this and go home," Heero muttered under his breath.
They all stared at him.
"What did you say, Heero?" Quatre asked him.
"I said let's do this and go home," he repeated.
"Heero…" Trowa said worriedly,
Wufei scowled. "You've been looking inattentive since you arrived. If you don't want to be here…"
"That's not what I mean. You and this mission have my full attention," he told them, and met them all in the eye with such force that they sat back. "I will perform better than I ever have. I'm just saying let's not drag this out. I need to be home."
Quatre and Trowa just stared at him, obviously confounded.
"Why? Because you don't want to die?" Sally said. "Forgive me, Heero, but I have trouble believing you're afraid of death now."
"I'm not."
"We may all of us be killed," Trowa said practically. He paused, seeming confused. "You're the last person I would expect to have to explain that to."
"You don't understand," he said
Quatre blinked. "Understand what, Heero?"
Heero leveled his gaze on Quatre. "I just want this to end. I want to go home and tend to my family."
Wufei's scowl deepened and he crossed his arms. The look he shot Heero could have scraped the skin off his face. "You don't have any family last time I checked."
"Wufei," Sally said, putting a hand on his arm to calm him.
"You've turned into jelly since you've gotten so involved with that girl," Wufei said, wrenching his arm away. "It's disgraceful."
Heero didn't say anything to that. He didn't always believe Wufei's anger toward women. It seemed forced sometimes. "I can still kill people," he said darkly.
Quatre gave Heero a strange, considering look, as if to say "but you don't want to, do you? Neither do any of us."
Heero uncrossed his arms, laid his hands on the table and tried to look more relaxed and less self-conscious.
Trowa just shook his head. "I don't doubt your abilities, Heero. I never could, but what…"
Quatre was staring at Heero's hands on the table with something like amazement. Sally's eyes were glued to his ring, as wide as saucers.
"Oh my God," Sally said.
Quatre choked. "Heero, did you get married?"
There was a moment of awkward silence.
"Yes."
Wufei's mouth dropped open.
"Heero…" Sally breathed. "And Relena?"
Abruptly, Trowa started laughing, clutching his stomach and keeling over in his chair. No one even looked at him.
"And you left us out of it?" Quatre demanded, his eyes wide with offense.
Heero turned one of his hands over, unable to comment. "I…"
Sally smacked a hand to her forehead. "Heero…" She chuckled. "You'd better plan a second ceremony! I can't believe I missed it. How could you leave us out?"
"No one was there," he said uncomfortably. "Except Zechs and Damion and some of his staff."
"What?" Wufei demanded.
"When did you get married?" Quatre said, blinking. He sat perfectly still.
"Last night."
Quatre looked like he swallowed his tongue.
"How was the wedding night?" Sally teased him.
Heero's tongue clove to the roof of his mouth, but he could help a smile.
Wufei's eyes blazed and he stood up, practically shaking. "You're going to be totally useless!" He shouted furiously, smacking the table with the flat of his hand.
Trowa laughed harder.
*****
Damion sat on the edge of a cabinet, one leg dangling off, boot hanging just above the tabletop. A clipboard lay forgotten in his lap as he adjusted the head set, listening with half an ear to the other leaders as they talked to each other.
The leaders were individually stationed in different places so it was difficult for everyone to meet together, but he still had attended three meetings since his arrival and only one by this type of communication. This was the first quiet moment he had gotten in awhile, perched as he was on the filing cabinet in the observatory, looking out over the empty plains where this little abandoned transmissions tower sat desolate. But there was an excellent communications set-up here and he could hear through his headset what the other leaders were saying at a meeting some forty miles distant, though their conversation had technically ended a good fifteen minutes ago.
The door opened and Manny came in with a brown folder full of papers and envelopes. Damion's bodyguards let him through. Damion was never let completely alone anywhere in the tower and he was not allowed outside it. He always had at least two guards on his person and usually more people within shouting distance. There was an entire garrison in the building, as well as members of his staff and some international conveys that traveled at great risk between towers and cities were the leaders had gathered. Security was intense.
"Hey," Damion said to Manny with a relieved smile. He set down the clipboard and pulled the headset down around his neck. "What do you have for me?"
"What are you doing up there, Master Damion?" Manny asked, reaching to hand him the folder.
Damion pointed to the window. It overlooked the plains. "I can see better," he said.
"What are you expecting to see?"
"I don't know. I just feel like I should be watching."
Everybody felt that way.
Inside the folder was another list of Taravren citizens expected to be either dead or trapped in Gardiner's widening territory. He read down the list with a dreadful feeling. He had been handed many of these and they made his chest feel tight. Even when still at home they had come to him. He had inadvertently memorized some of the names.
"Any word as to the military part of this operation from Oswold?" he asked. He should talk to the captain of his guards himself, but he didn't want to hunt him down or force Manny to do it.
Manny shrugged. "It's being kept secret last I heard. All I know is that they're going to penetrate the border within a few weeks, gather up who they can and open transmissions for you and the other leaders to hopefully inspire everyone to cooperate long enough to pull everyone out before the main confrontation."
Damion nodded, trying not to consider the details, all the things that could go wrong. He knew that it was likely Heero would be part of the scouting group that would penetrate the Aramat perimeter and relay the message. It was impossible to believe that everyone would get through alive. He didn't want to be one of the first people to see his name on one of these lists.
If Heero made it through the border and managed to relay the leaders' broadcast to the survivors in the hills, he would also have to survive long enough for the main forces to break across and snap up Gardiner's men. That would be the real fighting, heavy, ground fighting when the peacekeeping forces would be forced to crack down on Gardiner's mob.
And then there was Gardiner himself. Damion hadn't seen his picture until he arrived here as his visual had not been released to the media in fear of scaring him away. But the snipers knew what they were looking for now, a tall, clean-cut young man with reddish hair and brown eyes. Gardnier would likely be near Camradie. Intel said that city was his most recent project, that word was he hoped to occupy it before the end of the month.
Leaping down from the cabinet, Damion arrayed the folder on the table. Manny pulled up a chair and sat down, watching him leaf through the reports.
At the bottom of the stack was a letter.
From Audrey.
Manny was grinning now.
"Why didn't you tell me right away?" he breathed, snatching it from the pile and practically ripping it open.
Manny laughed at him.
*****
Julia lit a long slender white candle with a match and used it to light a second candle on the windowsill in the library. She blew out the match with a little puff of air, watching the tendrils of smoke rise in front of her face.
Audrey Veron sat at a small table in the library, writing another letter, though she had sent one off already this morning. She wrote with even, fluid strokes, the candlelight casting a rough golden light on the pale skin of her arm and cheek.
Relena Peacecraft was there too, sitting across from Audrey with a pen in her hand as well, smiling as she wrote, holding her long hair out of her face with her hand, her head leaning against her arm. Julia wondered if a letter would get through to that young husband of hers at this point, but she did not say so.
Smiling to herself, Julia lifted the two candlesticks and brought them to the table.
"I do not know how you can see to write," she murmured, placing them in the middle of the table. The flame of the little candle that had sufficed before was drowned in the light she brought.
"I like to write by candlelight," Audrey said, but her eyes were fixed on the page.
Relena didn't seem to be paying much attention to the conversation either.
Julia regarded the two of them without comment, watching their facial expressions as they read over their words carefully. Relena smiled as she wrote, though something about the tilt of her eyebrows conveyed an anxiousness in her heart. Audrey's expression was perfectly flat and cool, but she wrote with an avid concentration. As the days passed by she had grown more melancholy, retreating into a world of contemplative thought and consideration, but be that as it may, she was in love.
It was difficult for Julia to believe that her little Damion would soon be married to this woman, that the little prince she had grown up with would soon be king and husband both, and perhaps father too in due time.
She removed herself from the scene, letting the girls write their hearts on paper and walked back to the window. She remembered Damion as a sweet and proud eleven-year-old princeling and Manny as a rakish boy just beginning to understand his job as a servant and less as a partner in mischief. They had been a rowdy team, but sweet to her, though she had been too prim for their boyish games at that age.
But he would always have her loyalty. She would never forget the day Damion comforted her when he found her balling in a corner when she was thirteen, not knowing why she cried until months later. She glanced at Audrey now and smiled sadly. If she had known Audrey in another circumstance, if it had been anyone other than Damion, she would have told the girl to bury her heart and drown her feelings. It was difficult to say who's happiness she wanted more, Damion for who he was and had always been in her life, or Audrey, who reflected her experiences and likewise the condition of her heart. She herself had been softer once, wishing and hoping for love like other girls, and like Audrey had been deceived and destroyed by her naivete. There had been a short time in her life when she had loved Damion secretly, or thought she did, because he had comforted her and befriended her when so much changed. That had been years and years ago, when Clara Veron was rabid in her possession of the young and oblivious Prince of Taravren, when his interest in girls had been casual and curious if anything at all. She smiled to remember how she had shared her silly secret with the ever-receptive Manny and begged him not to tell. It was perhaps the only secret Manny had ever consciously kept from Damion. But of course, she outgrew it quickly and learned to walk a very different path. She had no regrets of her conscious choices, but she wished with the bits of her that still believed in love for other people that they would be happy. She wished it on Damion for his goodness, on Audrey for her sadness. She only hoped the two could find a common ground in which to share it.
And let me profusely thank everyone again (on my knees!) for all the reviews I received last chapter. There were SO many. I was SO happy. Ecstatic! Motivated! It was beautiful and I owe it all to you so please please please keep it up.
Wow, nothing really happens in this chapter since it's so in between everything. Please review anyway? You really should! You have seven (seven!) scenes to pick from after all, and I'm getting close to that craziness I've been promising for a long time, so the motivation would be useful!
Someone suggested a character poll a few chapters ago. That could be fun and useful to me, so hey, who's your favorite character? (Now, I know you all have special feelings for Heero and Relena, but not necessarily in this story). ^_^ Well, if you want to share I'd get a kick out of it, but no obligation! I happily take reviews of any kind, anything readers are generous enough to offer. THANK you for reading and reviewing. It means a lot to me, it really does.