Disclaimer... Why must the infernal disclaimers torture me for all eternity!!! Why!!! WHY!!!!!!!!!
ok... I've calmed down. Go back a chap and read the damn disclaimer if you want to, I've just gotta do a little ranting before I get down to the story... Many thanks to chazbone for the encouragement! Because you asked here is the next exciting chap in NEW HEROES!!!!!!!
Just a quick note: Me, the author will now have different way of speaking... text in *text* is just me narrating and when it is like this **text** is me talking to the characters. Now on with the story!!!
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*It is a new day in the Sanctuary and the two heroes have, inevitably been pulled back into the crazed madness of the Diablo 2 addiction (hey maybe I could design Diablo 2 patches (as in the ones with ciggaretts not the software patches you moron)... I'd make a fortune... hehehe) and started playing again. Fred and Sal are now in the Diablo 2 chatroom*
Fred: "Awwwww crap... The game don't exist no more..."
Sal: "Damnit!!!"
Everyone else in the chatroom: "Shut the hell up guys just whisper to each other!"
Sal: [sarcastically] "Well soooooooooory!"
*The two heroes decide to make a game and join. Sal joins a game and after waiting about a minute the black screen finally recedes and finds himself in the game. A few moments later Fred joins and suffers the same fate.*
Sal: [frantically] "Fred! Fred!! FRED!!! What's wrong buddy? Why aren't you moving?"
*A few moments later Fred begins to move and when the lag clears he finds himself being hugged by a frantic Sal.*
Fred: "Oooookay... get off me NOW!"
Diablo-2-Freak has joined this world Diablo's minions grow stronger
Sal: "Good one! Now you made Diablo's minions stronger! I hate you!"
Fred: "Shhhhh dude. This is the Author you are talking to!"
Diablo-2-Freak "Mwhahahahaha! I am the almighty Author and I can do as I please." [Forms a large sofa and footrest beside himself and sits down]
Sal: "Point taken."
Diablo-2-Freak: "Because I don't have the time or the bother to write you doing the den of evil again I'll just say you have done it."
Fred: "Sweet."
Diablo-2-Freak: "The quest is now completed. I shall now leave and continue to narrate from the comfort of my computer chair."
Diablo-2-Freak has left this world Diablo's minions grow weaker
Sal: [mumbles under breath] "Damn lousy author, thinks he can do what he wants..."
**I can hear you**
*Transforms Sal's clothes into a frilly pink tutu and Sal starts bashing himself in the head with a rock.*
**As you can see. Insulting me gets you nowhere**
Fred: "Common Diablo-2-Freak just put him back to how he was. I need a partner."
*Sal is reverted back to normal*
**I have tired of your rock-throwing ways. I have decided to change your classes to Barbarian and Paladin**
Sal: "I want Paladin 'cuz barbs are stupid"
**Sal shall be the barbarian and Fred shall be the Paladin.**
Sal: "Me... SMASH... AUTHER."
*An aura forms around Fred*
Fred: "Cool, well now that I'm a Pally I guess I gotta go 'Save the World' or some cr%$."
Fred: "Awww sh&* I can't even swear now... ahh well. C'mon Sal lets go. C'mon, C'mon, here boy C'mon!"
*Sal begins to follow Fred like a dog as they set out to kill the blood raven*
Fred: "Now we have to have a plan. What we need to do is..."
*Sal thumps Fred in the head with his club then runs off to get Blood Raven"
Sal: "ME SMASH UHHH... WHO ME SMASH???"
Blood Raven: "Join my army of the... WHAT YOU DON'T KNOW MY NAME!?!?!? ARRR WHY I SHOULD STICK MY BOW UP YOUR..."
*Blood Raven had suffered the same fate as Fred except for the fact that the blow had killed her*
Sal: "ME SMASH FUNNY WEIRD LADY GOOD!!!"
*Sal had to wait for Fred to cast a town portal because being a barbarian (a dumb barbarian even by barbarian standards) he couldn't operate a scroll.*
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Whoa! What a huge chapter! Don't expect more of them tho. I was feeling particularly inspired tonight and felt the need to write a heap. Its all thanks to my reviewers (all 2 of em). God damnit with having five, now six chapters up I would expect more that TWO reviews. common... Oh yeah no flames please. :)
ok... I've calmed down. Go back a chap and read the damn disclaimer if you want to, I've just gotta do a little ranting before I get down to the story... Many thanks to chazbone for the encouragement! Because you asked here is the next exciting chap in NEW HEROES!!!!!!!
Just a quick note: Me, the author will now have different way of speaking... text in *text* is just me narrating and when it is like this **text** is me talking to the characters. Now on with the story!!!
*********************************************************************************************************************************
*It is a new day in the Sanctuary and the two heroes have, inevitably been pulled back into the crazed madness of the Diablo 2 addiction (hey maybe I could design Diablo 2 patches (as in the ones with ciggaretts not the software patches you moron)... I'd make a fortune... hehehe) and started playing again. Fred and Sal are now in the Diablo 2 chatroom*
Fred: "Awwwww crap... The game don't exist no more..."
Sal: "Damnit!!!"
Everyone else in the chatroom: "Shut the hell up guys just whisper to each other!"
Sal: [sarcastically] "Well soooooooooory!"
*The two heroes decide to make a game and join. Sal joins a game and after waiting about a minute the black screen finally recedes and finds himself in the game. A few moments later Fred joins and suffers the same fate.*
Sal: [frantically] "Fred! Fred!! FRED!!! What's wrong buddy? Why aren't you moving?"
*A few moments later Fred begins to move and when the lag clears he finds himself being hugged by a frantic Sal.*
Fred: "Oooookay... get off me NOW!"
Diablo-2-Freak has joined this world Diablo's minions grow stronger
Sal: "Good one! Now you made Diablo's minions stronger! I hate you!"
Fred: "Shhhhh dude. This is the Author you are talking to!"
Diablo-2-Freak "Mwhahahahaha! I am the almighty Author and I can do as I please." [Forms a large sofa and footrest beside himself and sits down]
Sal: "Point taken."
Diablo-2-Freak: "Because I don't have the time or the bother to write you doing the den of evil again I'll just say you have done it."
Fred: "Sweet."
Diablo-2-Freak: "The quest is now completed. I shall now leave and continue to narrate from the comfort of my computer chair."
Diablo-2-Freak has left this world Diablo's minions grow weaker
Sal: [mumbles under breath] "Damn lousy author, thinks he can do what he wants..."
**I can hear you**
*Transforms Sal's clothes into a frilly pink tutu and Sal starts bashing himself in the head with a rock.*
**As you can see. Insulting me gets you nowhere**
Fred: "Common Diablo-2-Freak just put him back to how he was. I need a partner."
*Sal is reverted back to normal*
**I have tired of your rock-throwing ways. I have decided to change your classes to Barbarian and Paladin**
Sal: "I want Paladin 'cuz barbs are stupid"
**Sal shall be the barbarian and Fred shall be the Paladin.**
Sal: "Me... SMASH... AUTHER."
*An aura forms around Fred*
Fred: "Cool, well now that I'm a Pally I guess I gotta go 'Save the World' or some cr%$."
Fred: "Awww sh&* I can't even swear now... ahh well. C'mon Sal lets go. C'mon, C'mon, here boy C'mon!"
*Sal begins to follow Fred like a dog as they set out to kill the blood raven*
Fred: "Now we have to have a plan. What we need to do is..."
*Sal thumps Fred in the head with his club then runs off to get Blood Raven"
Sal: "ME SMASH UHHH... WHO ME SMASH???"
Blood Raven: "Join my army of the... WHAT YOU DON'T KNOW MY NAME!?!?!? ARRR WHY I SHOULD STICK MY BOW UP YOUR..."
*Blood Raven had suffered the same fate as Fred except for the fact that the blow had killed her*
Sal: "ME SMASH FUNNY WEIRD LADY GOOD!!!"
*Sal had to wait for Fred to cast a town portal because being a barbarian (a dumb barbarian even by barbarian standards) he couldn't operate a scroll.*
*********************************************************************************************************************************
Whoa! What a huge chapter! Don't expect more of them tho. I was feeling particularly inspired tonight and felt the need to write a heap. Its all thanks to my reviewers (all 2 of em). God damnit with having five, now six chapters up I would expect more that TWO reviews. common... Oh yeah no flames please. :)