I know… No update forever. But I am determined to finish this by the end of the summer!

Confessions and Confusion

"Yesterday, love was such an easy game to play…

Now I need a place to hide away…

Oh I believe in yesterday.

Why she had to go I don't know

She wouldn't say…

I said something wrong

Now I long for yesterday…"

~ Yesterday, The Beatles

She must've gone crazy, Hermione thought wildly, I'm Head Girl; I can't be pregnant! And how, if it exists, will the baby be raised, when Voldemort is attacking everywhere? How will I tell Oliver, who's just recovering from Voldemort's insanity? For that matter, how will I tell Harry and Ron, and everyone? What in this damned world will I ever do?

"What? A baby? When?" She said aloud, not aware that her eyes betrayed her turmoil of thoughts, as did the hands that rested, white, on her stomach. Yea, it is a little rounder… I wonder why I never noticed before.

"You're due on July 1st; you're about two months along now. And don't worry, Hermione, it has happened before," Madame Pomfrey replied, and Hermione could see kindness in the older woman's eyes, which had never shown itself with the woman's brusque nature.

"Madame Pomfrey?" Hermione asked, her face looking painted with its two bright red spots on paper-pale cheeks, "Madame Pomfrey; what will I do? Will Professor Dumbledore expel me? Can I still take my N.E.W.T.s?"

"Oh, darling," the older woman replied, silently wondering why in the world this brilliant young witch would have gotten herself into such a predicament, "Professor Dumbledore will talk to you on Sunday afternoon, with your baby's father, if he chooses to come. He'll answer everything. It'll be better soon…"

But Hermione, though slightly comforted in her teacher's arms, knew with a certainty beyond her age that nothing could ever be the same, and how would it ever, ever be any better?

°

The moonlit gardens behind the Weasley House of Healing were beautiful, Hermione thought, sitting comfortably next to Oliver. If only she didn't have this burden to bear, but she was determined to tell him as quickly as possible.

"Oliver?" she said, not daring to look into his eyes, but fiddling with the leaves of a nearby shrub, "I'm pregnant. With your baby… But listen! Do not tell a soul; what would everyone think? It'll be better for everyone; never speak to me again, never kiss me, never look my way! Hate me, all right?"

"Hermione, what are you saying? Are you conscious? I'm happy that we're going to have a baby – shocked, of course, but happy nonetheless. And why in my right mind would I let pillocks like Malfoy and his crew insult you, hurt you?" Oliver replied, angry that Hermione, who was now sobbing into her hands, was now blocked off from him, as with invisible glass.

"No! I'll lie; I'll tell Dumbledore… Oh, I don't know what I'll tell Dumbledore! I'll be normal until it's obvious I'm pregnant; I'll have the baby and be done with all of this! No! I will not kill you by association! Forget this baby; forget that I ever loved you, all right? Forget me, please!"

Lurching forward on the bench, he swept her into his arms, ignoring her fists hitting him, her screams to let her go now! Kissing her roughly, he whispered, "No. I will love you; death would be better than having you gone. No. I love you, Hermione!"

Freeing a hand, new tears blurring her vision, she slapped him with all the force she could muster, and ran, sobbing, to her room.

°

"What have I done?" she whispered to the ceiling, the paths of tears almost sparkling in the darkness. "What have I done? Lovely question there… I've lost him. Haven't I? Didn't he say he'd love me? But… Oh, why did I have to do that? Well, think about it, Hermione… You know why you had to! So he can date the perfect blue-eyed blonde, have two kids and be perfectly content. So no one hates him. So I don't see him suffer because of me. Because I love him, dammit! But why does love have to be so hard?" Weeping, she fell asleep, not knowing that she was watched from the doorway.

°

"Percy, what would you do if Penny had gotten pregnant, wanted to leave you under the reason of keeping you safe, but you heard her talking after she tells you all this, and she's sobbing and saying how much she loves you?" Oliver asked his friend and doctor.

"What's Penny been telling you?" Percy Weasley asked, his face getting pale.

"Nothing! Just, think of it hypothetically, I guess. What would you do?"

"I'd talk some sense into her."

"What if you'd already tried that, and she'd slapped you?"

"I'd -- Oliver, what's going on with you and Hermione?"

"That."

"What's 'that'?"

"The whole hypothetical Penny thing."

"Ah."

"Exactly. Now do you know what the hell I can do?"

"Give her a month or two, chap. She'll come around by then," Percy advised, his ears tinted pink.

"And if she doesn't?"

"I'll talk to you then."

°

So it was that a very quiet Hermione came back to Hogwarts early. When she got there, appearing in her dormitory, all she wanted to do was throw herself on the bed and weep. After all, it was about Saturday lunchtime (though the thought of food made her want to vomit), and no one was there. Something, though, made her go to the bathroom, spend half an hour on hiding all traces of tears, and go to the Common Room.

Parvati and Ron were there, snogging. Though she tried to get to the Portrait Hole as quietly as possible, they heard her, and stopped, startled.

"Hermione… You're… back!" Ron said, confused and trying to mask his annoyance.

"Yes, Ron, and I'm s-sorry to break up y-your kissing!" she said, beginning to sob anew.

"Hermione! What's wrong?" Parvati asked, rushing over to put an arm around her crying friend.

"Everything!" she answered brokenly, collapsing into a chair with Parvati's assistance.

"What? Explain, please."

"Wait, wait, please! Ron, get Harry; I might as well get this all over with at once…"

Within minutes, Parvati, Harry, and Ron were seated in front of her, looking anxiously at their friend, who looked back at them as if she was going to die.

"I- I'm pregnant…"

°

Author's Note: Well, as I said, I know I've taken forever. But I have the next chapter written, and ready to go. I hope you all review; I'd love you forever. And, because I feel like it, I'm having a contest! I need a name for the baby; any ideas? Post in your review, the winner gets a prize that I still have to determine…

Now, to thank my reviewers, who have more confidence in me than I do:

LightFaerie- Sweet? I guess; this story's rather sugary. But thank you! Am I really that predictable?

aznangelicgurl589- Thanks for the compliment; I know, another cliffhanger for you to enjoy. But don't worry, the next chapter'll be up before you die hanging there… XD

Kieka- Yep, Hermione comes undone. It was bound to happen eventually, but don't worry, she'll be back to her usual place soon enough. I hope you like this fic, and don't hate the fact that I procrastinate really badly…

G*Ness- Even though I haven't reviewed any chapters of your fic (sorry, finals, and then I went to CO with Girl Scouts, and then there was jazz band…), but I love 'em all the same. Thank you so much for writing your fics! And thank you infinitely for reviewing mine!

Hayley Mills- As of now, no, Oliver isn't gonna die. ::Watches as all Oliver fans sigh in relief.:: He'll live, but other characters probably'll die. No clues as to which ones, though!

NiKiTa-G- Yep, looking back on it, it was way too fast for anyone to become a couple. Can we call it true love?

Kat097- How could I leave you hanging like that? That, my dear, is a talent of mine.

b- Thank you! And I will update the next chapter soon…

piper- Danke! Merci! Gracias!

Tarillyn- Yep, the foreshadowing. You're the only one that caught on; you deserve a prize… Hmm, what *sort* of prize? XD And, if you write the plot bunnie, kudos to you!

Thank you all, and please review!