Shopping With Wrestlers

Undertaker

Disclaimer: I only own me.

~~~

Undertaker: -walks into the store, which now is a funeral home, specializing in coffins-

Jadyn: -dressed in a skimpy black dress- How can I help you?

UT: -in a hurry- I need two coffins, to go.

Jadyn: To go? What? You don't even need a funeral?

UT: No. Give me the coffins.

Jadyn: I'm sorry, but I can't do that.

UT: Why?

Jadyn: 'Cause I'm just too damn suspicious.

UT: Look, give me the coffins and I won't hurt you.

Jadyn: Oh, now you're gonna hurt me?

UT: -exasperated and desperate, he pulls a gun out of his leather jacket- Hell yeah, I'll hurt you! YOU WILL RESPECT ME!

Jadyn: -not to be outdone, she pulls a bazooka out from under the counter- No, I think YOU will respect ME!

UT: Whoa, uh, don't get any crazy ideas there, darlin'. I was just joking. I wasn't gonna shoot ya, honey.

Jadyn: -enraged- NOBODY CALLS ME HONEY!!! -shoots bazooka, which propels her six feet backward-

UT: -is suddenly covered in tee shirts- What the heck? 'Rest in peace with Jadyn'? Huh?

Jadyn: -to herself- Darn. Wrong bazooka.

UT: -heavy sigh-

Jadyn: Go away.

UT: -grabs Jadyn by the front of her skimpy dress- I need those coffins.

Jadyn: -dangling in midair- Why, did you kill someone? -her clunky shoes fall on UT's foot, causing him to jump and drop her-

UT: -holding his foot- Yeah, I killed someone all right? It was an accident. Now can I have the coffins?

Jadyn: -points to plywood- Unless you have money, there's your coffins.

UT: -growls, then grabs the plywood and walks out- I was tired of you anyway.

Jadyn: -calls police-