Yup. Still here in Florida. Still obsessing over Mia. Still trying to avoid
Becky.
Okay, so here's what happened after I left off.
Becky: (brightly) Hi, Michael!
Me: (dismayed) Hello, Becky.
(Becky is completely oblivious to my lack of enthusiasim at seeing her. Instead of disappering in a puff of smoke or getting herself eaten by a shark, which is what I want her to do, she sits down next to me.)
Becky: (curiously) What are you writing? (She tries to sneak a look at this laptop, I shut it.)
Me: Uhhh.(well I wasn't about to tell the truth, was I?) it's--
(Then what I like to call the Great Inspiration comes to me.)
Me: (confidently) It's a letter. To my girlfriend back in New York.
(Becky's eyes widen. She is SO not expecting this. Brilliant, huh? Artistically pointing out to Becky that I'm not available without having to point out that I wouldn't become her boyfriend even in the face of nuclear Armageddon.)
Becky: (trying to regroup.) Oh. Your-girlfriend.
Me: Yeah.
Becky: (quietly and looking down at the sand) You never mentioned you had a girlfriend.
Me: (starting to feel slightly guilty and trying desperately to squash the feeling) Yeah, well-you know-we just started going out and-uh, I'm not really sure where we stand-
Becky: (brightening up) So.you guys aren't exclusive?
(My eyes widen in horror at what she's suggesting. See, I blame my consience. If it hadn't been plauging me about squashing Becky's hopes and not having the guts to just tell her I wasn't interested, I would have had better control over my HUGE, ANNOYING, DOESN'T-KNOW-WHEN-TO-SHUT-UP mouth!)
Me: (trying desperately to get out of this bad situation) Well-I-uh-(Well, what the hell am I supposed to say? I DON'T know where Mia and I are right now. Dammit, for all I know she's over there in Genovia, being wooed by some dashing, denbonair princeling. And in retrospect, I can't believe I just used the word 'wooed'.)
Becky: Because there's this party tonight at the Beach Shack-and maybe you should come. I mean, it would be fun and everything-
Me: Uh, Becky-I don't really know-
(That's an understatement. I don't even want to be in the same hemisphere as Becky, much less the same party. I mean, she's not exactly the brightest blub on the tree. And she does NOT know how to take a hint. It's very simple. I am a sentimental chump who has no idea how to say no.)
Becky: Just think about it. (She stands up and grins suggestively at me.) See you there. (Then she walks off.)
Me: Merde.*
Later on-
(I walk in the condo, drop my laptop on the floor, and start banging my head against the wall. Lilly stares at me, her jaw dropping open.)
Lilly: Okay, who died?
Me: (dully) No one.
Lilly: Someone HAD to have died. Why else would you drop your laptop on the floor? You NEVER do that. You practically worship that thing! And stop banging your head against the wall! You might dent it.
(That's Lilly. Always worried about my well-being. I stop banging my head and sit on a chair.)
Me: Becky does not know how to take a freaking hint. She wants me to come to a party. As her date.
Lilly: (alarmed) Say what? But-what about Mia?
Me: I know.
Lilly: She IS your girfriend.
Me: Is she?
(Lilly stares at me.)
Lilly: Are you NUTS? Of course she's your girlfriend. You're crazy about her, she's crazy about you-and frankly, I can't stand the thought of seeing you two start pining for each other all over again. Seeing you pine is bad enough.
Me: (reassurred somewhat) Yeah, you're right. It's just-I don't know. It wouldn't be so bad if I could contact her. Dammit, I miss the girl.
Lilly: Look, we'll all be back in New York soon. Just hang in there. But if the two of you engage in suck-face rituals when I'm around I WILL reserve the right to kick both your butts.
Me: (grinning) Fine. (I sigh.) Listen, I'm going to go into my room now-
Lilly: (smiles knowingly) And start moping about Mia?
Me: (mock-serious) Hey, hey, hey! I do not mope, I BROOD. There is a difference. And if anyone calls, tell them I'm honing my brooding skills.
Lilly: (grins and gives me the thumbs-up sign.) Will do.
You know, there are times when I kinda like my sister. But if you tell her, I'll have to kill you. Or at least send you a very nasty computer virus.
Okay, so here's what happened after I left off.
Becky: (brightly) Hi, Michael!
Me: (dismayed) Hello, Becky.
(Becky is completely oblivious to my lack of enthusiasim at seeing her. Instead of disappering in a puff of smoke or getting herself eaten by a shark, which is what I want her to do, she sits down next to me.)
Becky: (curiously) What are you writing? (She tries to sneak a look at this laptop, I shut it.)
Me: Uhhh.(well I wasn't about to tell the truth, was I?) it's--
(Then what I like to call the Great Inspiration comes to me.)
Me: (confidently) It's a letter. To my girlfriend back in New York.
(Becky's eyes widen. She is SO not expecting this. Brilliant, huh? Artistically pointing out to Becky that I'm not available without having to point out that I wouldn't become her boyfriend even in the face of nuclear Armageddon.)
Becky: (trying to regroup.) Oh. Your-girlfriend.
Me: Yeah.
Becky: (quietly and looking down at the sand) You never mentioned you had a girlfriend.
Me: (starting to feel slightly guilty and trying desperately to squash the feeling) Yeah, well-you know-we just started going out and-uh, I'm not really sure where we stand-
Becky: (brightening up) So.you guys aren't exclusive?
(My eyes widen in horror at what she's suggesting. See, I blame my consience. If it hadn't been plauging me about squashing Becky's hopes and not having the guts to just tell her I wasn't interested, I would have had better control over my HUGE, ANNOYING, DOESN'T-KNOW-WHEN-TO-SHUT-UP mouth!)
Me: (trying desperately to get out of this bad situation) Well-I-uh-(Well, what the hell am I supposed to say? I DON'T know where Mia and I are right now. Dammit, for all I know she's over there in Genovia, being wooed by some dashing, denbonair princeling. And in retrospect, I can't believe I just used the word 'wooed'.)
Becky: Because there's this party tonight at the Beach Shack-and maybe you should come. I mean, it would be fun and everything-
Me: Uh, Becky-I don't really know-
(That's an understatement. I don't even want to be in the same hemisphere as Becky, much less the same party. I mean, she's not exactly the brightest blub on the tree. And she does NOT know how to take a hint. It's very simple. I am a sentimental chump who has no idea how to say no.)
Becky: Just think about it. (She stands up and grins suggestively at me.) See you there. (Then she walks off.)
Me: Merde.*
Later on-
(I walk in the condo, drop my laptop on the floor, and start banging my head against the wall. Lilly stares at me, her jaw dropping open.)
Lilly: Okay, who died?
Me: (dully) No one.
Lilly: Someone HAD to have died. Why else would you drop your laptop on the floor? You NEVER do that. You practically worship that thing! And stop banging your head against the wall! You might dent it.
(That's Lilly. Always worried about my well-being. I stop banging my head and sit on a chair.)
Me: Becky does not know how to take a freaking hint. She wants me to come to a party. As her date.
Lilly: (alarmed) Say what? But-what about Mia?
Me: I know.
Lilly: She IS your girfriend.
Me: Is she?
(Lilly stares at me.)
Lilly: Are you NUTS? Of course she's your girlfriend. You're crazy about her, she's crazy about you-and frankly, I can't stand the thought of seeing you two start pining for each other all over again. Seeing you pine is bad enough.
Me: (reassurred somewhat) Yeah, you're right. It's just-I don't know. It wouldn't be so bad if I could contact her. Dammit, I miss the girl.
Lilly: Look, we'll all be back in New York soon. Just hang in there. But if the two of you engage in suck-face rituals when I'm around I WILL reserve the right to kick both your butts.
Me: (grinning) Fine. (I sigh.) Listen, I'm going to go into my room now-
Lilly: (smiles knowingly) And start moping about Mia?
Me: (mock-serious) Hey, hey, hey! I do not mope, I BROOD. There is a difference. And if anyone calls, tell them I'm honing my brooding skills.
Lilly: (grins and gives me the thumbs-up sign.) Will do.
You know, there are times when I kinda like my sister. But if you tell her, I'll have to kill you. Or at least send you a very nasty computer virus.