Wow . . . this is sure getting some good response . . .oh yea, and for
those fans of Téa/ Anzu, I don't like her because she can't fight. She
portrays that image that girls are cheerleaders and if they do finally
play, they're crappy at what they do. For those reasons, Mai is my favorite
female character on the show. Heck, she's the most like me, personality
wise, at least. Oh yea, reading Distant Memories by Digipuppy sealed the
deal of me hating Téa.
Warning: Character Torture.
***
Yuki: Hmm, I'll use these requests in order, meaning that if you reviewed first, your idea will be used first.
Joey: Wah! Pegasus ate all of my food!
Pegasus: *Leaning against the wall with a full belly* I love Seto!
Seto: *across the room looking scared* I want you.
Yuki: Blue diamond, you can use my idea, I guess. But shouldn't you think of something of your own?
Yugi: *nods* She's right, y'know. You shouldn't put us all through this all over again!
Yuki: Oh, I almost forgot, here's something from YamiJupiter15! *Hands Yugi a paper*
Yugi: *bites his lip and looks around for Yami*
Yuki: Nope, he's not here right now. He's still recovering from out little bout, but at least he's fully agreed to the 'Rent a Yami' business.
Yami: *is sitting in some place* I love you. *Stares at clouds*
Yugi: But . . .
Joey: Aw, don't worry, Yuge, it couldn't be that bad.
Bakura: *scowling in a corner* WEEEEEE!!!!!
Yugi: *looks to his right and sees Joey, gives Joey a kiss*
Joey: *jumps a bit* GAH! Why me! First some girl-y guy eats all my food, and now my best friend, a guy, kisses me! Ahhh!
Yugi: Uh, sorry?
Yuki: Random Rockstar says to take off the curses. Let's see, Bakura, Ryou, Pegasus, Yami, and Seto will be free, for now.
Yugi: But . . .why me?
Yuki: You just got yours, but I'll bring Yami back.
Yami: *falls out of the sky and lands on his butt* Ow, you damn authoress!
Yugi: Yami! *Hugs Yami and suspiciously eyes the authoress*
Yami: ^__^
Yuki: Alright, Deja*vu sends packages!
*Packages rain on Yami*
Yami: HEY! *Shakes the packages off*
Seto: How come Téa got knocked out, but not Yami?
Yuki: Well, um, maybe these are lighter?
Seto: Uh huh.
Yuki: *ignores him* Joey gets a truckload of Pixie Sticks and nachos.
Ryou: Can we really handle a hyper Joey?
Seto: Nope.
Joey: *eats ravenously* Ooh. Yea. Sugar. Getting. Hyper. Oh, yea!
Yami: *sarcastic* Oh joy. Now we will have fun dealing with this, won't we?
Yuki: ^_^ Yup! Pegasus gets wine!
Pegasus: I love Seto.
Yuki: You don't have to say it anymore.
Pegasus: I know.
Seto: Eep.
Everyone else: Ew.
Yuki: Seto gets bandages and healing ointment.
Seto: *protects stuff with his arms* Mine! All mine!
Everyone else: O_o
Yuki: Yami and Bakura get flame-throwers, grenades, and machine guns.
Yami: Hmmm.
Bakura: MWAHAHAHAHA!
Ryou: Deja*vu, that wasn't a very smart thing to do!
Deja*vu: *falls from the sky* Oh. Oh well.
Seto: What's she doing here?
Yuki: I dunno, she wanted to come. But, this is the rule, anyone can come, but unless they're actually a character, they will only be here for one chapter!
Deja*vu: Aw . . .
Yami: Thank . . .whatever god I'm supposed to thank.
Bakura: Don't you mean Ra?
Yami: But Yugi's history book said he doesn't exist.
Bakura: What?!
Everyone else: *shudders* History.
Bakura: Good thing I am a Satanist.
Deja*vu: You are?! Ah! Save me!
*No one moves*
Deja*vu: What's wrong with you?
Yami: *shoots once into the air* This is strange coming from someone who sends us weapons.
Deja*vu: Oh.
Yuki: Hey Yami, Pachelbel wants to rent you!
Yami: NOOO!
Pachelbel: So, how long can I have him?
Yuki: Uh, I think until someone else wants to rent him or until the end of the chapter.
Pachelbel: Oh well, long enough! *Glomps Yami*
Yami: *can barely breathe* Urk . . .
Yuki: Well, for not being tortured last chapter, people seem to want you to suffer!
Yugi: Why me? I thought I was the cute one!
Yuki: Well, Pegasus was wrong, even the cutest people have to pay! Pachelbel said so! Here's what you have to do! *Whispers in his ear*
Seto: So Yugi, what does it feel like to be cursed? Not fun, is it?
Yugi: I sing 'the Barney song' in the shower.
Seto: *caught off-guard* Er . . .alright then. That's . . .interesting . . .
Joey: Yugi, that doesn't sound like a very fun curse at all.
Yugi: Someone farted one time, and I said it was Joey, everyone believed me, but it really was me.
Everyone: *slightly inch away from Yugi*
Joey: BAH! So that was why everyone was spraying toilet freshener on me!
Yami: Sorry Yugi, I'd love to help you, but . . .
Pachelbel: You're mine! *Gives Yami a hickey*
Yami: HEY! *Hickey disappears*
Pachelbel: What the fuck?!
Yuki: Sorry, stuff like that cannot, will not, happen here.
Pachelbel: Oh shit.
Yami: Thank . . .whoever . . . I need a new religion . . .
Yugi: One time, at the beach, I took off my swim trunks in front of everyone because someone told me that it would help me get girls.
Everyone: O_o x 1000000.
Yuki: Seto, you get something from JenniChan. *Hands him a paper*
Seto: *frowns deeply*
Joey: *jumps around* So. Kaiba. Kaiba. Kaiba. Kaiba. Whadaya gotta say?
Seto: I love Teddy bears, especially the cute cuddly ones.
Bakura: *smirks* Really? *Continues to play basketball with the grenades*
Yuki: JenniChan, evil is better!
Bakura: Damn straight!
Yuki: From her, I get a book of curses. Curse #538 Make them suck on their thumbs for a full minute whenever someone says a word with any letter in their name. This would be fun, but then no one would get to talk . . .
Everyone: *sighs in relief*
Yuki: Joey gets a frog!
Frog: *sees the hungry look in Joey's eyes, and jumps out the window*
Joey: Aw! I wanted to eat that!
Tristan: You're demented!
French Guy: Mon Dieu! You were willing to eat the frog raw!?
*Tristan and French Guy disappear*
Joey: *goes back to eating his food*
Deja*vu: Shouldn't he at least thank me for giving you that food?
Ryou: I don't think that he's going to stop eating unless there's promise for more food. Yami: *Pachelbel is sitting on his lap* So, Seto, what was the other thing you had to say?
Seto: *scowls* I hate money so I'll give all my money away. *Throws all the money in his wallet to Yami*
Yami: Here, aibou! *Tosses money to Yugi*
Yugi: *smiles gratefully that Yami didn't say his name and puts the money in his pockets*
Yuki: Yami, you get a book on past Egyptians.
Yami: *skims through it* HEY! Why am I not in here?!
Pachelbel: Aw, Yami, shut up. *Hugs tighter*
JenniChan: Oops . . . *Disappears*
Yuki: Yugi, you get a deck of cards!
Yugi: Hey! They're blank! One time, I hit on this girl working at the pet store and she pat my head, gave a dog biscuit and said, 'Nice doggy'.
Everyone: *they are unable to O_o anymore*
Yuki: Seto, you get Jigglypuff's marker. Too bad it only works when people are asleep.
Seto: *looks for Téa*
Téa: *with no duct tape on her*
Seto: *Tries to draw on her, but it doesn't go on*
Téa: *wakes up* Huh?
Yuki: JenniChan says to be nice to her.
Bakura: WHAT THE FUCK!?
Yuki: Oh, quiet now. She sent you a toy car.
Bakura: What am I supposed to do with that? Hmmm. I know! *Puts grenades in the seats*
Yuki: Whoops, that was for Ryou . . .
Ryou: You let him blow up my car?!
Yuki: Well . . .everyone makes mistakes, right? You can have Bakura's gift, it's Mokuba's toy duck.
Duck: *squeak, squeak*
Ryou: Well . . .okay.
Yuki: DarkPhoenix wants Téa dead.
Téa: But, I thought I was protected in this chapter!
Yuki: Fine! You won't die . . . yet. I'll wait until there is no one who wants you to live.
Téa: Should I be relieved?
Ryou: I don't know . . .
Yuki: Here's another curse, Yugi! *Gives a paper to Yugi*
Yugi: -_- Well, this one is better . . .
Yuki: How much food does Joey have left?
Deja*vu: I dunno, things aren't looking good for him.
Yuki: Great! Let's watch!
Yugi: *walks over to Joey's pile of food and eats it all like a starving man, i.e. Joey* Blech, how do you eat that much . . .
Joey: No, no, no! Yugi! Why did you eat all my food!? *Cries like a baby*
Yuki: Bakura, Kako sends you this paper. *Gives Bakura the paper*
Bakura: *looks at paper and scowls* Damn you all.
Pachelbel: *cutting off Yami's air supply* So now what do you want to do, Yami?
Bakura: *walks over to Pachelbel and kisses her*
Pachelbel: *blushes* Can I have them both?
Yuki: You just got greedy, so bye!
Pachelbel: Nooo! *Disappears*
Yami: I'm saved!
Yuki: Er . . .yeah, keep thinking that . . .
Yami: What?
Yuki: Jennifer and Nikki send things . . .Here comes, Nikki!
Nikki: *falls on the floor* Hiya!
Yami: *cautiously* What is she doing here?
Nikki: I wanna be with you guys!
Yuki: You can stay, but you can't act like Pachelbel, alright?
Nikki: Aw . . .but I'm a yami, too . . .
Bakura: Then you're all right! Come, let us blow things up!
Nikki: Yay!
*Nikki and Bakura go . . .somewhere . . .*
Yuki: I got Pest-Be-Gone, but I can't use that this chapter, so I'll just save that . . . But, I also got a spray that turns people into chibis! *Sprays Bakura and Yami*
*Bakura and Nikki return from . . . somewhere . . .*
C. Bakura: Why da fuck did you turn me inta a chibi!?
Nikki: Cutie! *Glomps*
C. Bakura: Help me!
Yuki: Alright, if you are a chibi, you are immune to curses.
C. Bakura: Dat's bedder!
Yugi: Yami's a cutie!
C. Yami: *sees glint in Nikki's eye* *crawls into Yugi's arms* Hide me, Yugi!
Yugi: ^________^ Okie! *hugs Yami* Yuki: Awww!
Deja*vu: I want a chibi!
C. Yami and C. Bakura: NO!
Yuki: I also got I-Love-You-Spray! *Reads* Spray at someone and the next person's name they hear they will instantly fall head over heals in love with (them)! I will not use this yet, but soon . . .mwahahahaha!
Everyone: *scared*
Yuki: Ryou, Bakura, Yami, and Yugi, Jennifer says that you are the coolest anime characters in the entire world.
Ryou and Yugi: *smile modestly*
C. Yami and C. Bakura: We doe!
Seto: *looks like he's going to die from laughing*
Yuki: Seto, I give Magicman's curse to you! Here you go! *gives paper*
Seto: Here you go!
C. Yami: Wut?
Seto: What?
C. Yami: Aibou, Kaiba is being a dum ass!
Yugi: *happily hugs Yami* Aw, it's okay, Yami!
C. Yami: *sulks*
Yuki: Joey gets a trio of Blue Eyes White Dragon cards that once belonged to Seto Kaiba.
Joey: Yay! Ha, Kaiba!
Seto: Ha, Kaiba! -_-
Yuki: Seto gets a ticking time bomb, a flask of nitroglycerin, and several other things set to explode.
*All Explode*
Seto: *write on the ground, 'Where's my ointment?'*
Joey: Whoops, sorry, Kaiba. I ate it.
Seto: I ate it.
Yuki: Téa gets a Yami and a Yugi doll.
Téa: *Téars in her eyes* Thank you! Someone cares! I'll treasure these forever!
C. Yami and Yugi: But, we-
Yuki: Don't waste your breath, guys, she'll never listen.
C. Yami and Yugi: -_-
Yuki: Yami and Yugi, you guys get free passes to Star Wars II: Attack of the Clones.
Yugi: I thought we already saw it.
C. Yami: Well, it'll be dark . . . But . . . No! Anyone, please make me not a chibi!
Yuki: And well Tristan will now be an on going character in this fic.
Tristan: *falls from the sky* Hey . . . how'd I get here?
Yuki: Magicman sends you these words of advice: Don't trifle with the dead. They have eerie powers.
Tristan: What!? Oh man, I think I'm gonna pee in my pants!
Yuki: Actually, people are unable to do that here, that would just be nasty. Who knows what Bakura would do?
Everyone else: *shudders at the thought*
Tristan: Joey, help me out here, man!
Joey: No can do, Tristan. We're just sitting ducks here.
Deja*vu: According to the new ff.net rule, I think this thing needs a plot.
Yuki: NOOOOOOO! Anybody got any ideas?
Seto: I think that you should just get on with the suggestions before you worry about that.
Yuki: Okay . . .wait a minute, weren't you cursed?
Seto: I don't remember what it was . . .
Yuki: Oh well, neither do I. Magicman sends Pegasus their warmest regards . . .and a lifetime supply of Gorgonzola cheese and all the Funny Bunny comics they could find.
Pegasus: Thank you! Some mouse-y guy named Mr. Jingles (sorry KawaiiBlackMoon) ate it all! And look at this! I didn't even know that this issue existed! I thank you!
Everyone: *leaves Pegasus in a corner to . . .do whatever he does when in the possession of wine, cheese and comic books*
Seto: I bet he'd be less insane if he just stuck to reading manga.
Tristan: I agree.
Yuki: Ryou gets a book, called 'How to Release Your Internal Rage'.
Ryou: *reads a couple pages and then takes a deep breath* I HATE YOU! YOU ARE A TERRIBLE YAMI! YOU JUST ACT INSANE AND BLOW THINGS UP! GET A LIFE AND LEAVE ME ALONE!
C. Bakura: Geez, I neber noo you felt dat way! I'm doh glad! I thought you were passive and weak all dis time! I love tat book!
Yuki: All right then. Bakura, you get a large supply of guns, knives, lasers, and various other weapons!
C. Bakura: Why do I hab to be a chibi! I can't even lift half of this duff!
C. Yami: Dat's good!
Yugi: *hugs Yami some more* Yeah, Bakura you should be less violent, then maybe, you would get a nice boy/girl friend.
C. Bakura: Why da slash?
Yugi: Well, who knows? You could go either or both ways.
Yuki: Alright, this conversation is getting a bit weird, so here are Reanimation and Hybrid Theory CDs for Bakura and Ryou, respectively.
C. Bakura: Anyone got a CD player?
Ryou: Nope.
C. Bakura: Oh well, I'll turn it into a hat! *Puts a lock of his hair through the hole at the middle of his CD*
Ryou: This is what I'm talking about!!
Yuki: Those were from Shadow and Dark Promise, but I don't understand the curse . . . Here Yugi, it was meant for you, what do you think? *hands him a paper*
Yugi: Hmm. I think I understand, but what are the chances of this? Besides, I live in Japan! Here is where guys like Yami are skinnier than Britney Spears!
C. Yami: True, that.
Yuki: Mistic sends stuff. Bakura will be unchibi-ed.
Bakura: Finally! Now Yami, I can hold my weapons again!
C. Yami: Eep!!!!!!
Yuki: Cutie! *Turns to Bakura* Bakura, no death shall come to him, understand?
Bakura: Grrrrr! What's the point then? *Drops weapons*
Yuki: Seto, here's a curse! *Gives Seto a paper*
C. Yami: So, Seto, whaddya gotta say?
Seto: Wanna shake that booty?
C. Yami: But I'm a chibi! It'll look weird . . .
Some people: *stares at Yami*
C. Yami: Now what did I say?
Yugi: Ooh, nuthin, Yami.
C. Yami: *not convinced*
Yuki: Ryou, you get Curse-B-gone spray.
Ryou: *holds it close* I'll never let go spray, I'll never let go!
Yuki: I've been waiting for this! Now, here is stuff from KawaiiBlackMoon!
Everyone: *sarcastic* Oh joy.
Yuki: Ryou gets a wedding dress with a letter saying: Don't damn me! Damn your self!
Ryou: Another dress!? Let me guess, I have to wear it?
Yuki: Well, you said it!
Ryou: *mumbles something about evil authoresses having too much freedom of speech for their own good, and walks away to change*
Yuki: For the next chapter, where she can get some regular ol' torture, just like everyone else, Téa gets a lotion that contains a deadly virus that can cause skin cancer.
Téa: Why do you hate me?
Yuki: We just do. Just like Apple Jacks!
Téa: -_-
Yuki: Bakura gets 50 gallons of beer and a tuxedo!
Bakura: Something is suspicious . . . *Wears tuxedo anyway and drinks the beer, becoming tipsy*
C. Yami: I dun't lick dis at dall!
Yuki: Alright, Yami. I've had enough!
Yami: Thank you so much! *Hugs Yugi* My protecter!
Yugi: ^_______^
Yuki: You and Yugi get couple rings! Cute!
Yugi: *blushes* ^____^
Yami: ^_____^
Yuki: Seto, you get a backfiring bazooka and two fuzzy pink bunnies that multiply every five seconds!
Seto: Wanna shake that booty? *Tries to escape the pink bunnies, but can't*
Yuki: No thanks.
Pegasus: Hey look! It's Funny Bunny!
Yuki: Joey gets 90000 Red-Eyes shaped chocolates!
Joey: Finally! Someone sends me more food! *Begins to be a pig again*
Yuki: Yami gets four Blue-Eye White Dragon cards and three Blue-Eyes Ultimate Dragon cards!
Yami: MWAHAHAHAHA! Now how will you defeat me, huh? Now you're the one who doesn't stand 'a ghost of a chance'!
Seto: -__________-
Yuki: Yugi gets a cute lil' purple dress.
Yugi: Aw man! *Looks at authoress with cute shiny eyes*
Yuki: GAH! Cute! *Looks away* Go change!
Yugi: Alright. Come help, Yami!
Yami: *jumps at the opportunity* Okay!
Yuki: HEY! WAIT! Ryou is still in there! I'll make it up to you in a plot- less NC-17 fic!
Yugi and Yami: Okay. ^__^
Yuki: Seto gets a pink bra.
Seto: Wanna shake that booty?
Yuki: Here's the curse that goes with it. *Gives him a paper*
Seto: I'm wearing a bra.
Tristan: Ew, man! What are you talkin about? Just because you get something you don't like doesn't mean you have to use it!
Seto: Do you want to see it?
Tristan: Hell no!
Seto: *takes off his shirts* I'm wearing a bra.
Tristan: *shields his eyes* Augh! Man I can see that!
Joey: This is nothing.
Tristan: O__o
Yuki: Pegasus gets a paper. *Paper flies over to Pegasus*
Pegasus: I like bunnies!
Tristan: O_o Okay, that has already been established.
Pegasus: Hop, hop, hop! *Hops around*
Tristan: O_o Now I've seen it all.
Joey: Nope.
*Ryou and Bakura both are next to each other and look like they're gonna get married*
Nikki and Yuki: Kawaii!
Yuki: Here you go! *Papers fly to Bakura and Ryou*
Ryou: Bakura?
Bakura: Yes?
Ryou: Do you want to marry me?
Bakura: Of course I will!
Yuki: Great! Now you are officially unofficially married! You may now kiss the . . .each other!
Bakura and Ryou: *kiss because the authoress said so*
Yuki: There is a very good curse for Téa here. Med-Jai ferret sent something else bad for Téa, but again, we can't use it yet. It will have to be next chapter, where no one can be protected! MWAHAHAHAHA!
Yuki: Yami, however, is not so lucky. He had to do one push-up for every 'e' in words spoken by the official cast members, since I talk too much.
Yami: *comes back holding Yugi's hand* Nooo! Just when I thought I was safe!
Yugi: But aren't I cute?
Yami: -_- *does two push-ups*
Yuki: Yup, you are cute! Here ya go! *Paper flies over to Yugi*
Yugi: Oh.
Yuki: Ryou must drink 10 gallons of soda whenever his name is said. And 50 some gallons of soda were sent for this.
Ryou: *sitting next to Bakura* -_-
Joey: *looks up from eating* My throat is kinda dry . . . *Drinks all of the soda*
Ryou: *smiles gratefully at Joey* Thank you so much!
Bakura: *glares at Joey*
Yuki: Bakura must eat a stick of butter every time 'why' is said.
Bakura: Well, that doesn't sound too likely.
Yami: *does three push-ups*
Yugi: Why?
Bakura: *scowls and eats the butter*
Yuki: And I get: '99 and 1/2 Ways to Create Curses w/ Voodoo', a book! Beware, or your next chapter will be your last!
Everyone: *thinks, 'Eep.'*
Yuki: The next thing is for Joey! He now thinks that he is Kaiba!
Joey: *walks around with his head up high* I'm Seto Kaiba, and I make more money than all you losers! I plan to take over the world and make everyone suck my-
Yami: *does ten push-ups*
Tristan: *knocks Joey out* That's enough!
Yami: *does one push-up*
Yuki: The next vict- er, hell, I don't know what else to call it! Pegasus is next! He will get electrocuted every time his name is said.
Yugi: Why?
Bakura: Damn you. *Eats another stick of butter* You're going to make me fat.
Everyone: O_o
Yami: *does three push-ups*
Yuki: Juu-Chan wants to rent Bakura.
Juu-Chan: Here I am!
Bakura: Sorry babe, I just got hitched.
Yami: *is starting to sweat because he has to stay in the push-up position, does two push-ups*
Juu-Chan: No fair!
Yuki: Well, Ryou will get his regular clothes back. *sighs*
Ryou: Thank you ever so much.
Yami: O_o *does two push-ups*
Juu-Chan: You're welcome!
Yuki: Lerian, you can be in the next chapter, since this is nearly the end and it wouldn't be fair. Yay! From Lerian Miliko Amaya, I get a voodoo doll of Téa, two cases of needles and a limited edition of a book of the best curses! Next chapter, I can't wait! And Joey gets food!
Joey: X_x
Yuki: Well, it will be waiting for him when he isn't Kaiba anymore. Sadly, Yami and Yugi will be spending the rest of this chapter in the NC-17 that I will eventually write.
Yugi and Yami: *disappear*
Seto: I'm wearing a bra.
Yuki: Seto you have to act like Mokuba's rubber duckie when someone says your name.
Tristan: Where's Pegasus? *Hears a zapping noise* Oh.
Bakura: Seto Kaiba, you haven't suffered enough yet.
Seto: *suddenly gets into a rubber duckie position and stays still* You will pay for this Bakura! Can someone take off my bra!?
Yuki: I wouldn't say that if I were you because Bakura gets daggers!
Bakura: MWAHAHAHAHA!
Yuki: Tristan, you get guides to a new hair-style.
Tristan: *sticks his head in the book and out comes a Mohawk*
Everyone: X__o
Yuki: And Pegasus *Zap* gets a new black suit that trimmed with silver. And I think that I'm finally done with the requests.
Deja*vu: About time.
Yuki: Oh, hey. I forgot you were here.
Deja*vu: I know. -_-
Nikki: You forgot about me, too.
Yuki: Shouldn't you go home? Yami isn't here and Bakura is unavailable. Any way, are there any ideas for a plot of some sort?
*Crickets chirp*
Yuki: -_- Fine then. Make the reviewers decide.
Tristan: *now has a 'fro* Is that good?
Joey: God no.
Tristan: -_-
Téa: Well, this has been interesting to watch . . .but the guys with Yamis are . . . involved with their Yamis! Who is left now? Kaiba, Joey, Tristan? Noooo!
Joey: Do ya have to so, insultin?! Besides, you forgot Pegasus!
Téa: No!!!
Pegasus: *zap*
Warning: Character Torture.
***
Yuki: Hmm, I'll use these requests in order, meaning that if you reviewed first, your idea will be used first.
Joey: Wah! Pegasus ate all of my food!
Pegasus: *Leaning against the wall with a full belly* I love Seto!
Seto: *across the room looking scared* I want you.
Yuki: Blue diamond, you can use my idea, I guess. But shouldn't you think of something of your own?
Yugi: *nods* She's right, y'know. You shouldn't put us all through this all over again!
Yuki: Oh, I almost forgot, here's something from YamiJupiter15! *Hands Yugi a paper*
Yugi: *bites his lip and looks around for Yami*
Yuki: Nope, he's not here right now. He's still recovering from out little bout, but at least he's fully agreed to the 'Rent a Yami' business.
Yami: *is sitting in some place* I love you. *Stares at clouds*
Yugi: But . . .
Joey: Aw, don't worry, Yuge, it couldn't be that bad.
Bakura: *scowling in a corner* WEEEEEE!!!!!
Yugi: *looks to his right and sees Joey, gives Joey a kiss*
Joey: *jumps a bit* GAH! Why me! First some girl-y guy eats all my food, and now my best friend, a guy, kisses me! Ahhh!
Yugi: Uh, sorry?
Yuki: Random Rockstar says to take off the curses. Let's see, Bakura, Ryou, Pegasus, Yami, and Seto will be free, for now.
Yugi: But . . .why me?
Yuki: You just got yours, but I'll bring Yami back.
Yami: *falls out of the sky and lands on his butt* Ow, you damn authoress!
Yugi: Yami! *Hugs Yami and suspiciously eyes the authoress*
Yami: ^__^
Yuki: Alright, Deja*vu sends packages!
*Packages rain on Yami*
Yami: HEY! *Shakes the packages off*
Seto: How come Téa got knocked out, but not Yami?
Yuki: Well, um, maybe these are lighter?
Seto: Uh huh.
Yuki: *ignores him* Joey gets a truckload of Pixie Sticks and nachos.
Ryou: Can we really handle a hyper Joey?
Seto: Nope.
Joey: *eats ravenously* Ooh. Yea. Sugar. Getting. Hyper. Oh, yea!
Yami: *sarcastic* Oh joy. Now we will have fun dealing with this, won't we?
Yuki: ^_^ Yup! Pegasus gets wine!
Pegasus: I love Seto.
Yuki: You don't have to say it anymore.
Pegasus: I know.
Seto: Eep.
Everyone else: Ew.
Yuki: Seto gets bandages and healing ointment.
Seto: *protects stuff with his arms* Mine! All mine!
Everyone else: O_o
Yuki: Yami and Bakura get flame-throwers, grenades, and machine guns.
Yami: Hmmm.
Bakura: MWAHAHAHAHA!
Ryou: Deja*vu, that wasn't a very smart thing to do!
Deja*vu: *falls from the sky* Oh. Oh well.
Seto: What's she doing here?
Yuki: I dunno, she wanted to come. But, this is the rule, anyone can come, but unless they're actually a character, they will only be here for one chapter!
Deja*vu: Aw . . .
Yami: Thank . . .whatever god I'm supposed to thank.
Bakura: Don't you mean Ra?
Yami: But Yugi's history book said he doesn't exist.
Bakura: What?!
Everyone else: *shudders* History.
Bakura: Good thing I am a Satanist.
Deja*vu: You are?! Ah! Save me!
*No one moves*
Deja*vu: What's wrong with you?
Yami: *shoots once into the air* This is strange coming from someone who sends us weapons.
Deja*vu: Oh.
Yuki: Hey Yami, Pachelbel wants to rent you!
Yami: NOOO!
Pachelbel: So, how long can I have him?
Yuki: Uh, I think until someone else wants to rent him or until the end of the chapter.
Pachelbel: Oh well, long enough! *Glomps Yami*
Yami: *can barely breathe* Urk . . .
Yuki: Well, for not being tortured last chapter, people seem to want you to suffer!
Yugi: Why me? I thought I was the cute one!
Yuki: Well, Pegasus was wrong, even the cutest people have to pay! Pachelbel said so! Here's what you have to do! *Whispers in his ear*
Seto: So Yugi, what does it feel like to be cursed? Not fun, is it?
Yugi: I sing 'the Barney song' in the shower.
Seto: *caught off-guard* Er . . .alright then. That's . . .interesting . . .
Joey: Yugi, that doesn't sound like a very fun curse at all.
Yugi: Someone farted one time, and I said it was Joey, everyone believed me, but it really was me.
Everyone: *slightly inch away from Yugi*
Joey: BAH! So that was why everyone was spraying toilet freshener on me!
Yami: Sorry Yugi, I'd love to help you, but . . .
Pachelbel: You're mine! *Gives Yami a hickey*
Yami: HEY! *Hickey disappears*
Pachelbel: What the fuck?!
Yuki: Sorry, stuff like that cannot, will not, happen here.
Pachelbel: Oh shit.
Yami: Thank . . .whoever . . . I need a new religion . . .
Yugi: One time, at the beach, I took off my swim trunks in front of everyone because someone told me that it would help me get girls.
Everyone: O_o x 1000000.
Yuki: Seto, you get something from JenniChan. *Hands him a paper*
Seto: *frowns deeply*
Joey: *jumps around* So. Kaiba. Kaiba. Kaiba. Kaiba. Whadaya gotta say?
Seto: I love Teddy bears, especially the cute cuddly ones.
Bakura: *smirks* Really? *Continues to play basketball with the grenades*
Yuki: JenniChan, evil is better!
Bakura: Damn straight!
Yuki: From her, I get a book of curses. Curse #538 Make them suck on their thumbs for a full minute whenever someone says a word with any letter in their name. This would be fun, but then no one would get to talk . . .
Everyone: *sighs in relief*
Yuki: Joey gets a frog!
Frog: *sees the hungry look in Joey's eyes, and jumps out the window*
Joey: Aw! I wanted to eat that!
Tristan: You're demented!
French Guy: Mon Dieu! You were willing to eat the frog raw!?
*Tristan and French Guy disappear*
Joey: *goes back to eating his food*
Deja*vu: Shouldn't he at least thank me for giving you that food?
Ryou: I don't think that he's going to stop eating unless there's promise for more food. Yami: *Pachelbel is sitting on his lap* So, Seto, what was the other thing you had to say?
Seto: *scowls* I hate money so I'll give all my money away. *Throws all the money in his wallet to Yami*
Yami: Here, aibou! *Tosses money to Yugi*
Yugi: *smiles gratefully that Yami didn't say his name and puts the money in his pockets*
Yuki: Yami, you get a book on past Egyptians.
Yami: *skims through it* HEY! Why am I not in here?!
Pachelbel: Aw, Yami, shut up. *Hugs tighter*
JenniChan: Oops . . . *Disappears*
Yuki: Yugi, you get a deck of cards!
Yugi: Hey! They're blank! One time, I hit on this girl working at the pet store and she pat my head, gave a dog biscuit and said, 'Nice doggy'.
Everyone: *they are unable to O_o anymore*
Yuki: Seto, you get Jigglypuff's marker. Too bad it only works when people are asleep.
Seto: *looks for Téa*
Téa: *with no duct tape on her*
Seto: *Tries to draw on her, but it doesn't go on*
Téa: *wakes up* Huh?
Yuki: JenniChan says to be nice to her.
Bakura: WHAT THE FUCK!?
Yuki: Oh, quiet now. She sent you a toy car.
Bakura: What am I supposed to do with that? Hmmm. I know! *Puts grenades in the seats*
Yuki: Whoops, that was for Ryou . . .
Ryou: You let him blow up my car?!
Yuki: Well . . .everyone makes mistakes, right? You can have Bakura's gift, it's Mokuba's toy duck.
Duck: *squeak, squeak*
Ryou: Well . . .okay.
Yuki: DarkPhoenix wants Téa dead.
Téa: But, I thought I was protected in this chapter!
Yuki: Fine! You won't die . . . yet. I'll wait until there is no one who wants you to live.
Téa: Should I be relieved?
Ryou: I don't know . . .
Yuki: Here's another curse, Yugi! *Gives a paper to Yugi*
Yugi: -_- Well, this one is better . . .
Yuki: How much food does Joey have left?
Deja*vu: I dunno, things aren't looking good for him.
Yuki: Great! Let's watch!
Yugi: *walks over to Joey's pile of food and eats it all like a starving man, i.e. Joey* Blech, how do you eat that much . . .
Joey: No, no, no! Yugi! Why did you eat all my food!? *Cries like a baby*
Yuki: Bakura, Kako sends you this paper. *Gives Bakura the paper*
Bakura: *looks at paper and scowls* Damn you all.
Pachelbel: *cutting off Yami's air supply* So now what do you want to do, Yami?
Bakura: *walks over to Pachelbel and kisses her*
Pachelbel: *blushes* Can I have them both?
Yuki: You just got greedy, so bye!
Pachelbel: Nooo! *Disappears*
Yami: I'm saved!
Yuki: Er . . .yeah, keep thinking that . . .
Yami: What?
Yuki: Jennifer and Nikki send things . . .Here comes, Nikki!
Nikki: *falls on the floor* Hiya!
Yami: *cautiously* What is she doing here?
Nikki: I wanna be with you guys!
Yuki: You can stay, but you can't act like Pachelbel, alright?
Nikki: Aw . . .but I'm a yami, too . . .
Bakura: Then you're all right! Come, let us blow things up!
Nikki: Yay!
*Nikki and Bakura go . . .somewhere . . .*
Yuki: I got Pest-Be-Gone, but I can't use that this chapter, so I'll just save that . . . But, I also got a spray that turns people into chibis! *Sprays Bakura and Yami*
*Bakura and Nikki return from . . . somewhere . . .*
C. Bakura: Why da fuck did you turn me inta a chibi!?
Nikki: Cutie! *Glomps*
C. Bakura: Help me!
Yuki: Alright, if you are a chibi, you are immune to curses.
C. Bakura: Dat's bedder!
Yugi: Yami's a cutie!
C. Yami: *sees glint in Nikki's eye* *crawls into Yugi's arms* Hide me, Yugi!
Yugi: ^________^ Okie! *hugs Yami* Yuki: Awww!
Deja*vu: I want a chibi!
C. Yami and C. Bakura: NO!
Yuki: I also got I-Love-You-Spray! *Reads* Spray at someone and the next person's name they hear they will instantly fall head over heals in love with (them)! I will not use this yet, but soon . . .mwahahahaha!
Everyone: *scared*
Yuki: Ryou, Bakura, Yami, and Yugi, Jennifer says that you are the coolest anime characters in the entire world.
Ryou and Yugi: *smile modestly*
C. Yami and C. Bakura: We doe!
Seto: *looks like he's going to die from laughing*
Yuki: Seto, I give Magicman's curse to you! Here you go! *gives paper*
Seto: Here you go!
C. Yami: Wut?
Seto: What?
C. Yami: Aibou, Kaiba is being a dum ass!
Yugi: *happily hugs Yami* Aw, it's okay, Yami!
C. Yami: *sulks*
Yuki: Joey gets a trio of Blue Eyes White Dragon cards that once belonged to Seto Kaiba.
Joey: Yay! Ha, Kaiba!
Seto: Ha, Kaiba! -_-
Yuki: Seto gets a ticking time bomb, a flask of nitroglycerin, and several other things set to explode.
*All Explode*
Seto: *write on the ground, 'Where's my ointment?'*
Joey: Whoops, sorry, Kaiba. I ate it.
Seto: I ate it.
Yuki: Téa gets a Yami and a Yugi doll.
Téa: *Téars in her eyes* Thank you! Someone cares! I'll treasure these forever!
C. Yami and Yugi: But, we-
Yuki: Don't waste your breath, guys, she'll never listen.
C. Yami and Yugi: -_-
Yuki: Yami and Yugi, you guys get free passes to Star Wars II: Attack of the Clones.
Yugi: I thought we already saw it.
C. Yami: Well, it'll be dark . . . But . . . No! Anyone, please make me not a chibi!
Yuki: And well Tristan will now be an on going character in this fic.
Tristan: *falls from the sky* Hey . . . how'd I get here?
Yuki: Magicman sends you these words of advice: Don't trifle with the dead. They have eerie powers.
Tristan: What!? Oh man, I think I'm gonna pee in my pants!
Yuki: Actually, people are unable to do that here, that would just be nasty. Who knows what Bakura would do?
Everyone else: *shudders at the thought*
Tristan: Joey, help me out here, man!
Joey: No can do, Tristan. We're just sitting ducks here.
Deja*vu: According to the new ff.net rule, I think this thing needs a plot.
Yuki: NOOOOOOO! Anybody got any ideas?
Seto: I think that you should just get on with the suggestions before you worry about that.
Yuki: Okay . . .wait a minute, weren't you cursed?
Seto: I don't remember what it was . . .
Yuki: Oh well, neither do I. Magicman sends Pegasus their warmest regards . . .and a lifetime supply of Gorgonzola cheese and all the Funny Bunny comics they could find.
Pegasus: Thank you! Some mouse-y guy named Mr. Jingles (sorry KawaiiBlackMoon) ate it all! And look at this! I didn't even know that this issue existed! I thank you!
Everyone: *leaves Pegasus in a corner to . . .do whatever he does when in the possession of wine, cheese and comic books*
Seto: I bet he'd be less insane if he just stuck to reading manga.
Tristan: I agree.
Yuki: Ryou gets a book, called 'How to Release Your Internal Rage'.
Ryou: *reads a couple pages and then takes a deep breath* I HATE YOU! YOU ARE A TERRIBLE YAMI! YOU JUST ACT INSANE AND BLOW THINGS UP! GET A LIFE AND LEAVE ME ALONE!
C. Bakura: Geez, I neber noo you felt dat way! I'm doh glad! I thought you were passive and weak all dis time! I love tat book!
Yuki: All right then. Bakura, you get a large supply of guns, knives, lasers, and various other weapons!
C. Bakura: Why do I hab to be a chibi! I can't even lift half of this duff!
C. Yami: Dat's good!
Yugi: *hugs Yami some more* Yeah, Bakura you should be less violent, then maybe, you would get a nice boy/girl friend.
C. Bakura: Why da slash?
Yugi: Well, who knows? You could go either or both ways.
Yuki: Alright, this conversation is getting a bit weird, so here are Reanimation and Hybrid Theory CDs for Bakura and Ryou, respectively.
C. Bakura: Anyone got a CD player?
Ryou: Nope.
C. Bakura: Oh well, I'll turn it into a hat! *Puts a lock of his hair through the hole at the middle of his CD*
Ryou: This is what I'm talking about!!
Yuki: Those were from Shadow and Dark Promise, but I don't understand the curse . . . Here Yugi, it was meant for you, what do you think? *hands him a paper*
Yugi: Hmm. I think I understand, but what are the chances of this? Besides, I live in Japan! Here is where guys like Yami are skinnier than Britney Spears!
C. Yami: True, that.
Yuki: Mistic sends stuff. Bakura will be unchibi-ed.
Bakura: Finally! Now Yami, I can hold my weapons again!
C. Yami: Eep!!!!!!
Yuki: Cutie! *Turns to Bakura* Bakura, no death shall come to him, understand?
Bakura: Grrrrr! What's the point then? *Drops weapons*
Yuki: Seto, here's a curse! *Gives Seto a paper*
C. Yami: So, Seto, whaddya gotta say?
Seto: Wanna shake that booty?
C. Yami: But I'm a chibi! It'll look weird . . .
Some people: *stares at Yami*
C. Yami: Now what did I say?
Yugi: Ooh, nuthin, Yami.
C. Yami: *not convinced*
Yuki: Ryou, you get Curse-B-gone spray.
Ryou: *holds it close* I'll never let go spray, I'll never let go!
Yuki: I've been waiting for this! Now, here is stuff from KawaiiBlackMoon!
Everyone: *sarcastic* Oh joy.
Yuki: Ryou gets a wedding dress with a letter saying: Don't damn me! Damn your self!
Ryou: Another dress!? Let me guess, I have to wear it?
Yuki: Well, you said it!
Ryou: *mumbles something about evil authoresses having too much freedom of speech for their own good, and walks away to change*
Yuki: For the next chapter, where she can get some regular ol' torture, just like everyone else, Téa gets a lotion that contains a deadly virus that can cause skin cancer.
Téa: Why do you hate me?
Yuki: We just do. Just like Apple Jacks!
Téa: -_-
Yuki: Bakura gets 50 gallons of beer and a tuxedo!
Bakura: Something is suspicious . . . *Wears tuxedo anyway and drinks the beer, becoming tipsy*
C. Yami: I dun't lick dis at dall!
Yuki: Alright, Yami. I've had enough!
Yami: Thank you so much! *Hugs Yugi* My protecter!
Yugi: ^_______^
Yuki: You and Yugi get couple rings! Cute!
Yugi: *blushes* ^____^
Yami: ^_____^
Yuki: Seto, you get a backfiring bazooka and two fuzzy pink bunnies that multiply every five seconds!
Seto: Wanna shake that booty? *Tries to escape the pink bunnies, but can't*
Yuki: No thanks.
Pegasus: Hey look! It's Funny Bunny!
Yuki: Joey gets 90000 Red-Eyes shaped chocolates!
Joey: Finally! Someone sends me more food! *Begins to be a pig again*
Yuki: Yami gets four Blue-Eye White Dragon cards and three Blue-Eyes Ultimate Dragon cards!
Yami: MWAHAHAHAHA! Now how will you defeat me, huh? Now you're the one who doesn't stand 'a ghost of a chance'!
Seto: -__________-
Yuki: Yugi gets a cute lil' purple dress.
Yugi: Aw man! *Looks at authoress with cute shiny eyes*
Yuki: GAH! Cute! *Looks away* Go change!
Yugi: Alright. Come help, Yami!
Yami: *jumps at the opportunity* Okay!
Yuki: HEY! WAIT! Ryou is still in there! I'll make it up to you in a plot- less NC-17 fic!
Yugi and Yami: Okay. ^__^
Yuki: Seto gets a pink bra.
Seto: Wanna shake that booty?
Yuki: Here's the curse that goes with it. *Gives him a paper*
Seto: I'm wearing a bra.
Tristan: Ew, man! What are you talkin about? Just because you get something you don't like doesn't mean you have to use it!
Seto: Do you want to see it?
Tristan: Hell no!
Seto: *takes off his shirts* I'm wearing a bra.
Tristan: *shields his eyes* Augh! Man I can see that!
Joey: This is nothing.
Tristan: O__o
Yuki: Pegasus gets a paper. *Paper flies over to Pegasus*
Pegasus: I like bunnies!
Tristan: O_o Okay, that has already been established.
Pegasus: Hop, hop, hop! *Hops around*
Tristan: O_o Now I've seen it all.
Joey: Nope.
*Ryou and Bakura both are next to each other and look like they're gonna get married*
Nikki and Yuki: Kawaii!
Yuki: Here you go! *Papers fly to Bakura and Ryou*
Ryou: Bakura?
Bakura: Yes?
Ryou: Do you want to marry me?
Bakura: Of course I will!
Yuki: Great! Now you are officially unofficially married! You may now kiss the . . .each other!
Bakura and Ryou: *kiss because the authoress said so*
Yuki: There is a very good curse for Téa here. Med-Jai ferret sent something else bad for Téa, but again, we can't use it yet. It will have to be next chapter, where no one can be protected! MWAHAHAHAHA!
Yuki: Yami, however, is not so lucky. He had to do one push-up for every 'e' in words spoken by the official cast members, since I talk too much.
Yami: *comes back holding Yugi's hand* Nooo! Just when I thought I was safe!
Yugi: But aren't I cute?
Yami: -_- *does two push-ups*
Yuki: Yup, you are cute! Here ya go! *Paper flies over to Yugi*
Yugi: Oh.
Yuki: Ryou must drink 10 gallons of soda whenever his name is said. And 50 some gallons of soda were sent for this.
Ryou: *sitting next to Bakura* -_-
Joey: *looks up from eating* My throat is kinda dry . . . *Drinks all of the soda*
Ryou: *smiles gratefully at Joey* Thank you so much!
Bakura: *glares at Joey*
Yuki: Bakura must eat a stick of butter every time 'why' is said.
Bakura: Well, that doesn't sound too likely.
Yami: *does three push-ups*
Yugi: Why?
Bakura: *scowls and eats the butter*
Yuki: And I get: '99 and 1/2 Ways to Create Curses w/ Voodoo', a book! Beware, or your next chapter will be your last!
Everyone: *thinks, 'Eep.'*
Yuki: The next thing is for Joey! He now thinks that he is Kaiba!
Joey: *walks around with his head up high* I'm Seto Kaiba, and I make more money than all you losers! I plan to take over the world and make everyone suck my-
Yami: *does ten push-ups*
Tristan: *knocks Joey out* That's enough!
Yami: *does one push-up*
Yuki: The next vict- er, hell, I don't know what else to call it! Pegasus is next! He will get electrocuted every time his name is said.
Yugi: Why?
Bakura: Damn you. *Eats another stick of butter* You're going to make me fat.
Everyone: O_o
Yami: *does three push-ups*
Yuki: Juu-Chan wants to rent Bakura.
Juu-Chan: Here I am!
Bakura: Sorry babe, I just got hitched.
Yami: *is starting to sweat because he has to stay in the push-up position, does two push-ups*
Juu-Chan: No fair!
Yuki: Well, Ryou will get his regular clothes back. *sighs*
Ryou: Thank you ever so much.
Yami: O_o *does two push-ups*
Juu-Chan: You're welcome!
Yuki: Lerian, you can be in the next chapter, since this is nearly the end and it wouldn't be fair. Yay! From Lerian Miliko Amaya, I get a voodoo doll of Téa, two cases of needles and a limited edition of a book of the best curses! Next chapter, I can't wait! And Joey gets food!
Joey: X_x
Yuki: Well, it will be waiting for him when he isn't Kaiba anymore. Sadly, Yami and Yugi will be spending the rest of this chapter in the NC-17 that I will eventually write.
Yugi and Yami: *disappear*
Seto: I'm wearing a bra.
Yuki: Seto you have to act like Mokuba's rubber duckie when someone says your name.
Tristan: Where's Pegasus? *Hears a zapping noise* Oh.
Bakura: Seto Kaiba, you haven't suffered enough yet.
Seto: *suddenly gets into a rubber duckie position and stays still* You will pay for this Bakura! Can someone take off my bra!?
Yuki: I wouldn't say that if I were you because Bakura gets daggers!
Bakura: MWAHAHAHAHA!
Yuki: Tristan, you get guides to a new hair-style.
Tristan: *sticks his head in the book and out comes a Mohawk*
Everyone: X__o
Yuki: And Pegasus *Zap* gets a new black suit that trimmed with silver. And I think that I'm finally done with the requests.
Deja*vu: About time.
Yuki: Oh, hey. I forgot you were here.
Deja*vu: I know. -_-
Nikki: You forgot about me, too.
Yuki: Shouldn't you go home? Yami isn't here and Bakura is unavailable. Any way, are there any ideas for a plot of some sort?
*Crickets chirp*
Yuki: -_- Fine then. Make the reviewers decide.
Tristan: *now has a 'fro* Is that good?
Joey: God no.
Tristan: -_-
Téa: Well, this has been interesting to watch . . .but the guys with Yamis are . . . involved with their Yamis! Who is left now? Kaiba, Joey, Tristan? Noooo!
Joey: Do ya have to so, insultin?! Besides, you forgot Pegasus!
Téa: No!!!
Pegasus: *zap*