Buffy twirled her stake expertly. Yeah.... that got old six months after
she started slaying... She was done for the evening. Her sacred duty, blah
blah, all done. Bored. Her eyes alighted on Spike's crypt. Almost prancing
to the door, she knocked impatiently.
"Yeah?," came Spike's voice. But it wasn't coming from inside.
She twirled, stake raised. "Spike?" She walked in a circle around the crypt stealthily. Well, she thought it looked pretty darn cool.
"On the roof, luv."
She snapped her head to follow the sound-and the instruction. "Oh." Sheepish, sheepish, sheepish. "Hey."
He leaned his head over the side of the roof. "Hey, Slayer. Need some help? Or did you just stop by to chat?"
She grinned up at him. "Just chat. Whatcha doing?"
"Stargazing. A useful hobby when you're a night person." He cocked his head playfully. "Or unperson, as it were. Want to join me? There's a ladder at the back. It's hidden by that big bush."
She scampered, trying not to scamper, to the back, and climbed up the ladder. "Tada! Super-slayer skills, what can I say?" She sat on the edge, near him, her legs swinging. "Hey."
He chuckled. "I think we already said 'hey', luv. Did you have anything specific that you wanted to talk about?"
She shrugged. She was in a blissful mood, and not sure why. But she wanted to share it. And she wanted to play. "Wanna play a game?" She was proud of the way that there was absolutely only one percent innuendo in that question.
He raised an eyebrow and poked her in the ribs. "What kind of game, luv?"
She batted at his hands. "I believe you stated the no tickle rule. Deepest Secret."
He grinned. "I said no tickling me, and that's open for discussion. I like to play, too, you know. What's Deepest Secret?"
Her eyes lit up. "Each person starts with 5 points. And we take turns asking questions. You have the right to not answer any question. But you lose a point. And who ever loses all their points first, is a big loser."
"So it's basicly like Truth or Dare, without the dare, huh? But I don't like to play unless there's a little more at stake, pardon the pun. What happens to the person who loses?"
Buffy shrugged. "Depends on who plays. Um... if *you* lose, no more kitten poker, or for liberating purposes only."
He grinned at her. "And if you lose, no denial privledges. You know what I mean."
Her mouth moved. Then she grinned confidently. "You're going down. In fact, I'll even let you give the first question."
"Alright," he said. He layed down, allowing his legs to dangle over the edge of the roof. "Uh, let's start easy. What're your top three favorite movies?"
She mulled it over. "Princess Bride. Breakfast Club. Gone With the Wind."
"Gone With The Wind? You've got to be kidding."
She glared at him. "Is that a question? And by the way, Rhett was totally awesome. I bawled when Bonnie Blue died."
"But he left her in the end," he shook his head. "Never mind, it's your turn."
She grinned. "You never saw Scarlett. Hm..." She felt nice. "If you could listen to one CD, record or tape for eternity, what would it be?"
He locked his hands behind his head. "Hmm. I guess Bon Jovi's Slippery When Wet. My favorite song of theirs is on that cd."
"I totally love Jon Bon Jovi. He is hot beyond words."
He glanced at her. "That's a suprise, luv. Maybe we have more in common than we thought. Here's your question: How many times have you been in love?"
She mulled the question over, and discouned her un-decided feelings for Spike. Then decided to count them. Closely. "Um... one and an uncounted like... fourth." She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye, stilling her swinging legs. "How many times have YOU been in love?"
"That's easy. Three times in my whole life and unlife."
She nodded. "Your up. Score's still 5-5."
"Alright. Uh, what's your favorite desert?" He chuckled. "I should probably already know this, but I figured I'd ask, anyway."
She grinned, envisioning it. "Double chocolate vanilla icecream, in the container, with 'She's All That' on TV."
Spike licked his lips. "Oh, God. I love double chocolate anything. It's your turn."
The only thing Buffy loved more than playing any game was winning. "Who is Halfrek to you?"
Ah, she thought she'd get him with this, but he wasn't going to lose a point that easily. "I knew her. When both of us were human. In fact, she had something to do with an earlier question." He looked at her. "Remember when I told you about the night I was sired?"
Buffy nodded, knowing her question had more to do with him than the point.
He sighed. Who knew that there could still be pain after all those years? "When she was human, her name was Cecily." He stopped, letting it sink in.
"*That* *-bitch-*." The words rolled through her mind and out her mouth faster than she could control the slice of fury through her system.
That was a shock. "Whoa, calm down, luv. It was a long time ago. I'm over it." His eyes said otherwise.
The fury turning her eyes emerald belied her, "Sorry. I feel better now. Beneath her." She made a pfffft-ing noise. "And she's what? Ugly holey-face vengence demon now? Wow, how impressive at the demon class reunion..."
He chuckled. When did she aquire the ability to make him feel better about anything? "Is it my turn?"
She smoothed her feathers. "Yuppers."
"Ok. As of right now, do you still love Angel?" The question was posed lightly, but she could hear the hidden intensity. He wanted to know if she was over Angel, so that he wouldn't have the shadow of his GrandSire hanging over this relationship, as it had with Dru.
Buffy took a deep breath, and gave words to what she had felt so long ago. "When... Angel walked away, I was heartbroken. But I figured something out. Who he was with a soul was not who he really was at all. He was like... a mean dog on a leash. Remove leash, Angelus. I knew that when he killed Jenny. And nothing was the same after that." "So... No. I don't love Angel, because there really is no Angel to love. Only Angelus with a leash. And I won't love a mean dog."
The grin was huge for a moment, but he tamped it down. Tried not to look too happy. "Ok. Your turn, then."
"What did you love most about Dru?"
"You'll think it's stupid."
She shrugged. "Then don't answer."
He laughed. "Oh no, luv. I'm not losing a point on this. It was when she was taking care of me. After you dropped the church on me. She'd hold me, rub my sides. I loved that." He made a face. "Then Angelus showed up and ruined it." Looked at her. "For both of us."
She smiled bitterly. "Yeah... Anyway, you're up."
"Same question. What'd you love about Captain Cardboard?"
"Um..." She laughed. "He looked... impressed with me. I was something special, and it shone in his eyes when he looked at me."
"You are special, luv. You know that, right? You're a one of a kind, wonderful, beautiful woman. Everyone who knows you has been blessed to have you in their lives."
She looked down, surprised to feel a tear streaking down her cheek. She gave a half smile. "Sometimes I just don't think so." She smiled up at him. "But lately... I've felt better about being here. With people."
He grinned. "You and me both, luv. Your turn."
"Absolute biggest regret. Survey saays?"
He laughed. "Thank you, Louie Anderson." He turned thoughtful. "Huh. I guess it would be not knocking Doc off that bloody tower when I had the chance." Now it was his turn for a tear. He brightened slightly. "Now you, what's your biggest regret, luv?"
She thought back. Through everything. "I didn't tell my mom I loved her the day she died. I know she knew, we weren't fighting, but.... ya know?"
Spike tried to hide a sniffle. His hand went to the guardian angel charm on his chain. "I never told her how much our little chats meant to me. She talked me out of staking myself more than once."
Buffy smiled, only letting herself remember happy, vibrant, loving Joyce. Not vacant stare, on the couch dead Mommy. She shuddered. Thought of her smile, and was calmed. "You're up."
He shook his head. "Nuh-uh. Your turn. I asked your biggest regret, remember? Then we got off topic."
She nodded. "Yeah. Sorry." Her eyes lit up. A sly smile curved her lip. "Most horrendous, outrageous, disgusting sexcapade?"
Time for the big blue eyes look. "What!?"
She leaned back to lie on the crypt's roof, her arms behind her head. "I don't stutter."
"Oh, alright. But I don't want anyone else to hear this." He leaned over, whispered in her ear for a long time. The more he whispered, the wider her eyes got. Finally, he finished and layed back again.
The blush that had heated her face now threatened to catch Spike on fire. She averted her gaze. "That is so sick. I did NOT expect you to answer that." She moaned. "Oh God... I'm gonna need a therapist to get the image of you and- uggggghhhh!" She shuddered. She mimed poking out her eyes.
He laughed, hard. Clutching his sides. "When you think of other questions, remember that I'm a sick, twisted individual. And a vampire, at that." He relaxed and layed back again.
She glared. "Your turn, perv-o-matic."
He laughed again. "Ok. Remember what you said about Angel earlier? The dog comment? Do you think I'm a mean dog on a leash, too?"
She shook her head. "No. You... You were gentle, loving and kind, before the chip, to Dru, or whoever. Angel couldn't have done that." She smiled. "I guess your heart is your leash, but it's a respectable one. And you're a nice dog."
He panted playfully. "And do you like nice dogs?" He scooted closer. "Like, enough to rub it's stomach?" Puppy eyes, to make the image complete. "And it's your turn."
She rolled her eyes. "When I win this game, I'll pat your belly." She thought. "Um... Favorite thing about.... Xander?"
He chuckled. "Fair enough." Made a face. "Harris? I don't like anything about him." He noticed her look. "Oh, alright. He gets off a good joke, every now and then. There, are you happy?"
She laughed. "Wow. I think you should lose a point for that lame an answer."
"Hey! I answered, didn't I?! And, if you must know. My favorite thing about Xander is how he's always there for you." He gave her a playful look. "Now, what's your favorite thing about me?"
She ran her tongue across her teeth like he always did. Then she smiled sweetly. "Awww.. I think... that you always... Um..." She blushed.
"Well?"
"But it's- I wanna pass! But I won't! It's.... ah.. how you say you love me in your sleep." She rushed it out. In one tiny breath. "What's your favorite book?"
He looked suprised for a moment. "I do? I didn't know I talked in my sleep." He grinned. "Favorite book, huh? Here's another one that you'll think is stupid. It's Alice Through The Looking Glass." He got a far away look in his eyes. "A book that's full of nonsense, and yet, somehow, makes sense. It helped me to understand Dru."
She barely hid a snort at the thought of his old mistress.
"I heard that. Now, what's your favorite color?"
She glanced at him. "Yellow. And blue. It's a tie. Yours?"
He chuckled. "You won't believe me. It's deep purple. With midnight blue as a tie."
She grinned. "To each their own."
He returned her grin. "Yeah. Now, if you could see anywhere in the universe, even another planet, what would it be?"
She said thoughtfully, "The moon. It has such a large effect on people, on evil, on.. well, everything. I guess I'd want to know why." She glanced sideways at him. "Did you ever do anything with Angel?"
"Uh, what kind of anything?"
"Any, and every kind of anything. Ya know, -ANY- thing."
"Aside from him kicking my ass, repeatedly, us hunting together, and sharing Dru sometimes, no."
Her nose crinkled up for a split second and she evened out her features. "Ok."
"I have to ask this," he said, looking at her curiously. "Remember the other day, on your bed? When you were tickling me? Did you ever do anything like that with Peaches?"
She shook her head. "Never. We hugged. Cuddled. Kissed... ya know. But no. Nothing... really... ya know."
"You never played together? Really? I can't imagine being in a relationship without playing sometimes."
She smiled sadly. "No play." Her smile slipped. "Not even fore-" She stopped. "Why do you paint your nails black?"
He held up a hand, looked at it. "Don't really know. Thought it added to my "tough vamp" image."
She giggled. "Yes, you sitting in front of the 'telly' painting your nails oh-so-carefully certainly adds to that rough and tumble image."
He chuckled. "Yeah. I've been thinking about quitting, though." He looked at her. "Ok, when you first met me, first impression."
She snorted derisively, "What the hell is this? Asshole day? Then you got kinda scary... Cuz... everybody talks big. But you fight big, too. I just... fought, and shot off my mouth for all I was worth. And prayed to whoever looked out for slayers that you'd slip up."
He squirmed around a little. "I'm not scary now, am I?"
She smiled. "You love me. I don't have to be scared of you. Would I be sitting on a roof playing Deepest Secret with someone who scared me?"
"Good point. Got a question for me?"
"First impression, me."
He grinned. "Shorter than the last one. But when we got to fighting, tell you the truth, you scared ME."
She grinned and made pumping motions with her arms. "Grrrr. Arrrgh! Who's the slayer?"
He threw his hands up. "Oh no! Save me from the terrifying Slayer!" He rolled out of the way as she reached for him. "Ahh, help, the Slayer's gonna get me!"
She punched his arm. "Don't mock the slayer. She'll get you, boy."
He laughed. "I'm kidding, luv. Now, do you have a question?"
"It's your turn. I asked impression." She laughed. "You just can't stump me."
"Oh, yeah. Like you've even been trying with me."
"Only a couple times, pervo."
He laughed again. "Ok, let me try. Uh..." He grinned. "I've got it. Do you love me?"
She grew very still. Tilted her head away from him. "Point."
"Gotcha."
"If I ever asked you, after all the Scoobies are gone, Dawn, everyone.... would you... take me? Turn me?"
His eyes grew wide. "What? Make you a vamp? Take away the soul that I love so much? Never. If you wanted, I'd kill you, then stake myself."
"No," she snarked sharply, "You wouldn't!"
It was only then that she noticed the tears in his eyes. "I wouldn't want to live without them, either, luv. But I couldn't do that to you."
She nodded. "Unfair question.. but there will be no staking if Buffy's batteries finally don't recharge."
Now the tears fell. "If none of the Scoobies were left, if you were gone, who would stop me?"
She sat up, wrapped her arms around her knees. "A soul doesn't guarantee heaven. That's horrible of me, but it's true. People go to hell all the time. You will not." Her eyes flashed at him. " I will not allow it."
He moved closer, hoping for a hug. "You really care where I wind up?"
She wrapped her arms tentatively around him. "I guess so. So no staking till you're sure of a destination."
He leaned into the hug, putting his arms around her. "Just tell me where to go to buy the tickets, luv," he whispered in her ear.
She smiled softly. "My question. I was missing a sky blue thong with sunshines embroidered in gold. Like... when Riley was around. Did you steal it?"
He leaned back and layed back down. "Yeah. But I think you blew it up when you threw the grenade down there."
She smacked his arm indignantly. "You don't even have the shame to lie! Those cost me like... half a week's allowance." She glowered at him. "For panties I only got to wear twice."
He tried, unsucessfully, to hide a chuckle. "How much? I'll pay you."
She sniffed. "About $20, with inflation."
His eyes grew wide. "TWENTY BUCKS FOR UNDERWEAR?!! Where the hell do you shop?"
She smiled coyly. "I don't believe you shop there. Money. Palm. Buffy smile."
He let out an indignant sigh. "Fine." Pulled out his wallet. Handed her a fifty. "Keep the change. I probably owe you for other articles of clothing."
Her eyes grew big. "Dawn DIDN'T swipe my blue angorra sweater??"
"No. And I still have that, but you probably don't want it back."
She made a horrified face. "Oh, God. Ask your question. Hurry."
He grinned. "Why do you think that I don't want you to have it back? The sweater, I mean."
"... You probably put it on that horrible mannequinne... or... let the Bot wear it."
He laughed. "Close, but not quite."
She took another needed deep breath. "Why do you not want me to have it back?"
"Because Harmony wore it, and I didn't want to gross you out."
She dropped her head. "You let that ho-biscuit wear my sweater?"
He laughed. "Let's just say that it was a role playing thing."
She whimpered. "Again.... your question..."
"Let's go back to simple. Are there any animals that scare you?"
"Ew!! So totally. The spiders in Sunnydale? They grew in hell, on like.... Miracle Spidey-grow. I spaz and make Dawn kill 'em."
He shuddered. "I'm so with you on that. But it's scorpians that do it to me. Probably beetles too, now."
"Beetles? ... Eww, there's one right over there?" She pointed to a corner of the ceiling.
"WHERE!!?" He leaped up, spinning in a circle with vamp speed. "Where's a beetle? I hate beetles."
She stood, walked to the corner very calmly, and squashed it with her fashionable boot. "There. Gone. That's why they call me the Slayer!"
Spike let out a sigh of relief. "Whew. Thanks, luv. It could have been one of those flesh-eaters, like the ones in that Shaman's cave. That was one of the trials."
Her eyes grew large. "My question. Do you regret the trials?"
He sat back down. "They were painful, and scary. Make that bloody terrifying. But the result is worth it. So, no. I don't regret them at all."
She nodded. Very slowly, she placed her head in his lap, her eyes staring at his jean-clad knees.
"Do you regret trying... this? A relationship, with me?" He looked down at her, stroking her hair with a gentle hand.
"Am I scared, ridiculously ashamed of myself, yes. But no. I'm... glad?" She debated her word. "Yeah. Glad that we can even attempt. Even if we can't- Anyway, I'll know we tried. For the right reasons."
He looked down at her. "I love you. And this, whatever it is, will work. We'll make it work. We've come too far to fail now."
She smiled softly, turned her head into his thigh to hide it there. Then she spoke. "While you were gone... what did you miss most about me?"
"Your smile. Even though I didn't get to see it much. It just... it makes your whole face light up. Makes you even more beautiful."
She was flustered. How did he do that? "Oh."
"What'd you miss about me?" He looked up at the stars. "Assuming you missed me at all, that is."
She scoffed. "I missed you. I mean, even when I didn't want to. And... this is... wierd, considering."
"Yeah?"
"I missed touching you. Because whenever I needed you, I just... reached out. And you were there to hold on to. I needed someone to hold onto after everything... after Willow. After... everything."
He smiled, that genuine, heart-melting smile. "I'm here now, luv. You can touch me."
She smiled. "I know." She pouted. "I can't stump you. And I'm losing."
He grinned. "Try again. Maybe you'll get lucky."
She furrowed her brow. "You never watched me... um... doing anything.. in my room, did you?"
"Anything? Like what?"
"Like... anything... not-clothed-ee."
He ducked his head. "Point."
She muttered to herself, "Point means neither yes or no.. neither yes or no...."
"That's right, luv. Just like when you said it to the "Do you love me" question."
She shot him a pointed look. "Just a tad different. Ask away."
Spike leaned back again, liking how his passing on the last question had made her squirm. "Ok. What is your favorite.... Uh, book?"
She looked at him. "Don't laugh at me." She smiled fondly and said, "Don Quixote."
He nodded. "Yeah. I liked that one too. Now there's a guy that knows what it means to be devoted to your job." He chuckled.
She grinned at him. "What do you do with the kittens you win at poker?"
He debated telling her that he ate them, but then remembered that he'd sworn to tell the truth. "Let's just say that every week or so, a basket finds it's way to the SPCA."
She laughed. Long and hard. "That's so cute. Oh my gosh... haha..."
He snorted indignantly. "It's not funny, luv. Clem wanted to eat 'em."
She gasped. "Clem?? CLEM wanted to eat those little baby kitties???" She snorted. "I had a dream once... you sired like.. a whole litter of vampire kittens to suck my blood..."
"Well, he didn't want to eat them, per say. But he had a debt to Teeth. I wouldn't let him borrow from me, though." His eyes got big. "I never thought of that. Dru sired a puppy, once. But it made the mistake of biting Angelus. Poor thing wound up nailed to a tree, waiting for sunrise."
Buffy's eyes grew wide. "How... sick." She shuddered. "You're up."
"If someone had gone back in time, to six years ago, and told you what we've been doing for the last couple of weeks, what would be the hardest for you to believe?"
She grinned. "The... un-violence of it all."
"Come on, luv. Be specific."
She sat up from his lap. "That we'd... feel... for eachother. Ya know, the helping, the lo- caring... That sort of thing. I sling the question back at you."
He grinned. She'd almost said "love". Then he thought for awhile. "I guess I'd have to say the fact that I'm in love with you, mostly. Secondly, what happened when I grabbed Mr. Gordo the other morning. I would not have believed that, the one time that the Slayer had me totally pinned, that she'd be tickling me, rather than staking me."
She smiled ruefully. "True. I would have dusted your ass six years ago. Especially if you had the gall to lay one undead finger on my pig."
He chuckled. "I believe it. Now, have you ever had a crush on a teacher? Just something I was wondering about."
A blush suffused her cheeks. "Pass, pass, pass, pass, pass..."
He grinned. "It was Rupert, wasn't it?"
She glared at him, tossed her hair. "I -said- pass. Did you- Were you a virgin when you were turned?"
Thankfully, Spike couldn't blush. But he could be embarrased. He ducked his head. "Yeah. Dru was my first, and only for over a hundred years."
She sighed, disregarding the sweetness of the statement to mull over her disgust in not being able to get him to pass. "I really freaking hate her."
He sighed. "I wish I could..." Raised his head. "When you were little, did you ever want a pet?"
She wrinkled her brow at him. "Is that your question?"
"Yeah. I thought we'd go back to the easy ones." He sighed. "And the less painful ones.."
She laid her head back in his lap, feeling more relaxed. "I wanted a pony. But I got a cat. I named him Pyewackit."
"What kind of a name is Pyewackit?", Spike said, cocking his head.
She laughed. "It's the name of the cat in the first play I ever saw. Bell, Book and Candle." She grinned at the irony. "It was about witches."
He nodded. "Oh. Makes alot more sense than my cat's name."
She smiled. "What was his name?"
"When I first started feeding him, I thought he was a she. And he was always rubbing up against me, and generally bugging the hell out of me. So I named it Harmony. But, then I found out that it was a male, so I changed it to Harmon. He's black, with white feet and a white chin and chest." He looked around. "He's gotta be around here somewhere. He never goes far from the crypt."
She turned her head from looking at his knees to look at him in surprise. "That's the first pet you've ever had??"
He grinned ruefully. "When I was human, I had terrible allergies. No animals. Not even a rat or a mouse. I'd start sneezing, get an awful headache. Harm's the first pet that I've really had. Dru had pets, and I was the one that took care of them, since she never remembered to. But they weren't mine. Harmon's MY cat."
She grinned at the pride in his voice. "Well... I guess you get two questions now."
Another grin. "Fair enough. Who's your best friend, Red, or Harris? And what did they say when you told them about our rules?"
She shrugged. "Both of them are. I used to think Xander, cuz Willow was busy, then Willow, cuz Xander was busy. Everyone has things to deal with. They both are." She grinned. "Willow almost stood and cheered. It was almost like old-Willow. Told me she thought we'd been banging, but I look happy. Xander... eh... took some convincing. He groaned, bitched, generally froze me out. Then I broke a table on accident. Got his attention."
"And then what happened?"
She turned her head toward his knees again. Said very quietly, her body still, "Xander cried."
Spike looked down at her, shock registering on his face. "What!? Why? I'd understand him wanting to stake me, but what...?"
She looked slowly into his eyes. "You've had anyone he really loved, Spike. He's just... lost. We're trying to help him find himself again."
Spike's eyes filled with tears. "I hadn't... I mean, I didn't... I have to apologize to him." A single tear ran down his cheek. "Add that to the list of pain that I've caused... And people to apologize to..." Two more tears made their way down the planes of his face. "I want to help him. What can I do?"
She shrugged. "We're just.... being there. Making him important in my training, in running the Magic Box. Anything. He feels... low." She reached up, touched a finger to his tears. "We'll fix it. That's what we do after all, isn't it?"
He blinked and sniffed. "That's what you do. I just make things worse." He sniffed again. "And it's your turn."
She sat up indignantly and shoved a hand to his chest. "What the hell is the matter with you? So who was there for Dawn, or Anya? Or me, Spike? What would have happened to me without you?"
"You're right, luv," he said, head down. "It's just... I've caused so much sorrow. What I've helped with doesn't even scratch the surface. I just... feel... so bad." Another, barely supressed sniff.
Her feeling of wanting to kick the Spike fled, and she hugged him softly, shifting to sit in his lap. "You've helped save the world twice over. That negates some badness. Your turn."
He gave a pained grin and wrapped his arms around her. "Uh-uh. I asked my two questions, you answered them, and we started this. It's your turn, luv." He planted a soft kiss on the top of her head.
She looked to his eyes. "Ok. Do you realize that before your soul you were good, and a help, and we'd have been screwed without you?"
"I was not good. I was evil," he said with an indignant snort. "The only thing that stopped me from killing the lot of you was the chip." He waited a moment, deathly serious, it seemed. But the corner of his mouth was twitching.
Buffy rolled her eyes. "I don't sit on truly ex-evil people's laps. Excuse me." She made to move from his lap. He clasped his hands around her waist, making an undead seatbelt that effectivly prevented her from moving.
She laid her hands over his, linked over her waist. "Well? C'mon.. hit me with your best shot."
"Please tell me that wasn't meant as a song cue."
She laughed. "Only if you don't ask me a question." She pouted. "You're getting boring."
He play-growled in her ear and released one hand to poke her stomach. A spot that he'd discovered on a previous night. "Boring, am I?"
She jerked. "No tickling. Your rule. Ask." She turned her head. "I'll have to use all my feminie wiles on you."
He grinned. "I'm thinking of changing that rule. It's fun, when I'm not trapped. Now, how old were you when you had your first crush? Movie stars don't count."
She tapped her chin thoughfully. "Bobby Mackenzie, kindergarten." She sighed romantically. "He shared his blue crayon with me...."
Spike fought back a chuckle, and lost. He tipped over sideways, taking the indignant Slayer with him.
She pushed at him. "Don't laugh! He was-ha! Is hot!"
He continued to laugh, still holding Buffy, his hands locked around her waist. "But... Kindergarden?" Another fit of laughter. "What were you? Five?"
She snorted. "I was smart. I got to start when I was four." She squirmed.
"You want me to let go, Slayer?" He grinned. "Make me."
Her eyes flared with the challenge. She turned to him. Ran a hand down his arm. "No," she said throatily. "Don't let me go..."
Spike's eyes grew wide, and he loosened his grip. "Rules... we have rules..", he muttered under his breath.
She inched closer, eyes hooded, "But I..."
"Rules, rules, rules..." It was a chant, now.
She pouted up at him. "Are you saying you're not gonna..." she brushed a finger across his lips.
Spike closed his eyes. The "rules, rules, rules" chant still going, but really quietly. Did she want him to kiss her? They did have kissing rules, so it wouldn't be breaking them, right? His grip loosened even more as he fought to relax a very uncooprative body part that was making his jeans uncomfortably tight in a certain area...
She leaned in, bit his earlobe softly. "You better let me go unless we're breaking rules..."
Oh, that did it. That was a weak spot, and she knew it. He released her and rolled over with his back to her. Fighting to calm himself down, quite literally.
She smiled at her victory. "Make you, indeed, Spike, hmmm?"
"Can't talk right now," he ground out. "Consentrating..." Deep breath. "Your turn..."
She tried to think on something non-sexy just because she felt bad. "Ugliest clothes you've ever worn?"
"Bellbottom pants," came the vampire's reply. His back still to her. He wasn't sure if he could look at her just yet.
She nodded. "That *would* be atrocious on you." She sighed. "Sorry," she said petulantly. "You DID say make you."
He rolled halfway over, so that he was laying on his back, arms spread wide. "Yeah, but I guess I should have been more specific. As in WHAT I wanted you to make me do." He chuckled. "Because that wasn't it."
She laughed. "Sorry..." It was totally unrepentant. "You need to be specific. Besides, it was way fun."
"Uh-huh. For you, maybe. Bloody painful for me. I need to buy looser pants. I already told you that you cheat," he said with a grin, refering to her stint as "Inviso-Buffy".
She blushed. Blinked. "Um... Your turn." She said quietly, almost to herself, "When I win this game, we're revising kissing rules."
"I heard that. What else did you do while you were invisible? Besides me."
She glanced at him for his crudeness. "Messed with the social workers head... people's heads at the park... just... had fun. Floated a pizza box."
"Ripped all the buttons off my favorite shirt..."
She grinned ferally at the thought of the sex that day. "Yeah. Way with the not sorries."
He laughed. "What's your question, luv?"
"Hmm? Oh. Uh... What do you miss most, since 'The Rules'?"
He thought. "Huh. I don't know. I really like the way we are now." He gave her a glare. "When you don't cheat, that is. But I'd have to say... Just the feeling, being with you. At the moment where we stop being two bodys, and become one. That instant. The moment that lasts forever. That's what I miss most." He chuckled. "William the Bloody Awful Poet is at it again."
She swallowed. "That's what I hated most... because I love-liked it the most."
He raised an eyebrow. "Here's your question, luv. Define "love-liked"?"
"I... got scared. Every time. It was so good, but... I didn't want it to be."
He cocked his head, reached out and gently grabbed her hand. "Scared? Of... me?"
She tucked her chin against her chest. "Of the feeling."
He sucked in a breath. Was this it? Was she going to say it? "What feeling, luv?", he whispered, feeling the warmth of her pressed up against him. Allowing a low purr to start.
She felt tears starting and was embarassed by them. "I didn't want to fall in love with you. I didn't want to feel cherished. I wanted the sex- I never let it be anything else- be so horrible, just once, so I could just... walk away." She shook her head. "I didn't want to feel your warmth."
He actually couldn't breathe, which didn't really matter. "Are you saying that you did? Fall in love with me?" He wiped away a tear from her face. "That you are still?"
She shrugged, staring at him through flooded eyes. "Everytime... it was so warm. I don't know... I just knew that I had to fight too hard to not be." She touched his cheek. "I don't... I don't want to hurt you anymore.. but I don't want to hurt me either. And I can't... do this so fast, Spike. I have to be... be ready, and it'll take time." She looked at him concernedly. "Does that hurt you?"
He held her close, rested his chin on the top of her head. "Not really, luv." He rocked gently back and forth, comforting both of them. "And don't worry about the time thing. I have time. I have forever, I think." A sigh. "I do want to hear it, but only when you can say it and mean it. Not just say it because it's what you think I want to hear."
She glanced at him. "New topic. I'm all ugly and puffy now. Why have you never been like.... really hateful to Giles? You never even tried to kill him."
"You never look ugly to me, luv." He thought for a second. "I don't really know. And I'd like to know why it was so easy for me to accept him as my Dad during the whole Randy incident. I really like Rupert." He ducked his head, embarrased. "There's a part of me that wishes that he WAS my Dad. I kind of wish that I could be like him. Have all the answers. Always be able to help, no matter what. I guess that's why."
She kissed his cheek shyly. "You always do help, no matter what."
"Thanks, luv," he said with a grin. "You don't know how much it means to me to hear you say that. I guess it's my turn, huh?"
She nodded.
"Give me your honest opinion. The old Spike, chip, no soul, versus the new Spike, chip not working, with soul."
She looked confused. "Opinion of what?"
"Me. Which one do you like better and why?"
She thought. For a long time. "I guess.... New Spike is better, because if anything happens to us, we have a good chance of staying in the same place, ya know?"
"Same place?"
She shrugged. "We could both go to heaven."
He was truly touched. "You'd really want to spend all eternity with me?"
"I think I could."
He grinned, and hugged her tightly. "That's one of the reasons I love you, Buffy. You've got such a big heart, that there's even room for a misfit like me."
She hugged him back, softly. "I think we're both misfits. Um... Do... Were you mad when I cut my hair?"
"No. A little... dissapointed that you took away one of my favorite toys, but not mad. Are we doing personal appearance questions, now?"
"Ummm.... ok?"
"Do you like my hair better straight, or curly, and why?"
She smiled, ran her hand through the locks, and mussed them. "Curly. Because that's how it looks after VERY nice sex, not to sound like Anya, and you look at me, and just.. smile. "
He looked at her, and that smile crept out, followed by a chuckle.
She looked indignant. "What?? You asked!"
He chuckled again. "I was just thinking that I like your hair after you've been sleeping on it a couple of hours. It gets all sticking up and cute. Makes me smile."
She huffed. "My hair is not sticky- uppy!"
"Not right now. Your turn, luv."
She sat apart from him a few inches, wrapped her arms around her knees. "What is... the worst thing about me?"
He looked annoyed at the sudden lack of closeness, and then her question registered. "Worst thing? You mean that there's something wrong with you? You're not perfect?"
She rolled her eyes, and pushed out a boot to toe him in the leg.
He playfully grabbed the tip of her boot and shoved it away. "Oh, ok. Let me think. If you'd asked me this six years ago, I could have written volumes. Now... I'd have to say... Your trust issue. You make it extremely hard for anyone to get close to you. But once they are, you latch on like a pit bull, and that's one of the best things about you."
She smiled, enjoying his last part. "Oh."
"Now, same question, about me."
She paused, thought hard. "It's very easy for you to express emotion. But when you realize one... especially towards someone else, you almost expect it to be that easy for them. But you're persistant in it, a big plus."
He grinned. "Ah."
She grinned back at him. "Were you really gonna crack a while ago?" She referred to the 'making him'.
He held up a hand, finger and thumb less than an inch apart. "That close, luv. You really know how to push my buttons."
She smiled seductively. "I know. Were you really gonna kiss me?"
"Walking a fine line, let's just say that. Do I get two questions, now?"
She blinked. "Crap. Yeah."
"Is there anything I do that you find cute? And, if so, why and what are they?"
She smiled immediately. "Your nose twitches in your sleep. And you swear. Uber- mean british swear words. and it's so cute, because you look like you're pouting the whole time. Your bottom lip does this...." She demonstrated with her own, pouting it out in a petulant, sexy way. "...thing-ee."
He looked suprised. "I do? I didn't know that. Do I do anything else that I should know about?"
She smiled, a strictly knowing, female smile. "No."
He made a mental note to reask this question later. "Fair enough. Your turn."
She wrinkled her nose in thought. "What do you think is... like, the... um... sexiest thing about me? If I am, I mean." God, she berated herself. Way to sound experienced and worldly.
He gave her a gentle hug. "First of all, of course you are. Hasn't anyone ever told you that?"
"No?"
"Well here then. You are the sexiest woman that I've ever known."
Her smile was wide, but she tamped it down quickly. "Thank you."
He grinned. "And, to answer the question. You have this... attitude. This feeling of power and strength that just floats around you. I don't know about anyone else, but that does it for me. Also, there's this little thing you do, when you flip your hair out of your eyes. I've always found that extremely sexy."
She nodded, then grinned at him, and flipped her hair out of her eyes.
Spike groaned and layed back, almost causing the Slayer to topple off his lap. "That's it, now look what you've gone and done! You've taken me down with your womanly ways!" He layed his hand across his forehead melodramaticly. And then winked at her playfully.
She gave a small laugh, then leaned forward and kissed him, moving her lips across his, feeling very much a punch of desire, but a warmth that tempered it.
Spike held the kiss for an eternal moment, something to hold on to until the next time, then they pulled away at the same time. "Wow. Thanks, luv. I wasn't expecting that."
She sat on his lap, a bit farther back. "Neither did I. I keep pushing rules."
"I won't tell, if you won't."
She grinned. "We're gonna have to revise the kissing rules."
"Let's put that on the agenda.." He glanced at the horizon, suprised to see the first hint of sunrise. "For tomorrow. We've been playing this game all night!"
She frowned. "I was going to ask you if you wanted to stay the day at the house... I'm sorry. It's a little late now, huh?"
He grinned. "Let me run inside, and grab my blanket, and we'll make a run for it. It's only a couple of blocks, after all. And the sun's got a ways to go before it becomes harmful. We can finish the game at the house, if you want?"
She smiled at him. "Hurry. Dusty Spike is an automatic loser."
"Yeah?," came Spike's voice. But it wasn't coming from inside.
She twirled, stake raised. "Spike?" She walked in a circle around the crypt stealthily. Well, she thought it looked pretty darn cool.
"On the roof, luv."
She snapped her head to follow the sound-and the instruction. "Oh." Sheepish, sheepish, sheepish. "Hey."
He leaned his head over the side of the roof. "Hey, Slayer. Need some help? Or did you just stop by to chat?"
She grinned up at him. "Just chat. Whatcha doing?"
"Stargazing. A useful hobby when you're a night person." He cocked his head playfully. "Or unperson, as it were. Want to join me? There's a ladder at the back. It's hidden by that big bush."
She scampered, trying not to scamper, to the back, and climbed up the ladder. "Tada! Super-slayer skills, what can I say?" She sat on the edge, near him, her legs swinging. "Hey."
He chuckled. "I think we already said 'hey', luv. Did you have anything specific that you wanted to talk about?"
She shrugged. She was in a blissful mood, and not sure why. But she wanted to share it. And she wanted to play. "Wanna play a game?" She was proud of the way that there was absolutely only one percent innuendo in that question.
He raised an eyebrow and poked her in the ribs. "What kind of game, luv?"
She batted at his hands. "I believe you stated the no tickle rule. Deepest Secret."
He grinned. "I said no tickling me, and that's open for discussion. I like to play, too, you know. What's Deepest Secret?"
Her eyes lit up. "Each person starts with 5 points. And we take turns asking questions. You have the right to not answer any question. But you lose a point. And who ever loses all their points first, is a big loser."
"So it's basicly like Truth or Dare, without the dare, huh? But I don't like to play unless there's a little more at stake, pardon the pun. What happens to the person who loses?"
Buffy shrugged. "Depends on who plays. Um... if *you* lose, no more kitten poker, or for liberating purposes only."
He grinned at her. "And if you lose, no denial privledges. You know what I mean."
Her mouth moved. Then she grinned confidently. "You're going down. In fact, I'll even let you give the first question."
"Alright," he said. He layed down, allowing his legs to dangle over the edge of the roof. "Uh, let's start easy. What're your top three favorite movies?"
She mulled it over. "Princess Bride. Breakfast Club. Gone With the Wind."
"Gone With The Wind? You've got to be kidding."
She glared at him. "Is that a question? And by the way, Rhett was totally awesome. I bawled when Bonnie Blue died."
"But he left her in the end," he shook his head. "Never mind, it's your turn."
She grinned. "You never saw Scarlett. Hm..." She felt nice. "If you could listen to one CD, record or tape for eternity, what would it be?"
He locked his hands behind his head. "Hmm. I guess Bon Jovi's Slippery When Wet. My favorite song of theirs is on that cd."
"I totally love Jon Bon Jovi. He is hot beyond words."
He glanced at her. "That's a suprise, luv. Maybe we have more in common than we thought. Here's your question: How many times have you been in love?"
She mulled the question over, and discouned her un-decided feelings for Spike. Then decided to count them. Closely. "Um... one and an uncounted like... fourth." She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye, stilling her swinging legs. "How many times have YOU been in love?"
"That's easy. Three times in my whole life and unlife."
She nodded. "Your up. Score's still 5-5."
"Alright. Uh, what's your favorite desert?" He chuckled. "I should probably already know this, but I figured I'd ask, anyway."
She grinned, envisioning it. "Double chocolate vanilla icecream, in the container, with 'She's All That' on TV."
Spike licked his lips. "Oh, God. I love double chocolate anything. It's your turn."
The only thing Buffy loved more than playing any game was winning. "Who is Halfrek to you?"
Ah, she thought she'd get him with this, but he wasn't going to lose a point that easily. "I knew her. When both of us were human. In fact, she had something to do with an earlier question." He looked at her. "Remember when I told you about the night I was sired?"
Buffy nodded, knowing her question had more to do with him than the point.
He sighed. Who knew that there could still be pain after all those years? "When she was human, her name was Cecily." He stopped, letting it sink in.
"*That* *-bitch-*." The words rolled through her mind and out her mouth faster than she could control the slice of fury through her system.
That was a shock. "Whoa, calm down, luv. It was a long time ago. I'm over it." His eyes said otherwise.
The fury turning her eyes emerald belied her, "Sorry. I feel better now. Beneath her." She made a pfffft-ing noise. "And she's what? Ugly holey-face vengence demon now? Wow, how impressive at the demon class reunion..."
He chuckled. When did she aquire the ability to make him feel better about anything? "Is it my turn?"
She smoothed her feathers. "Yuppers."
"Ok. As of right now, do you still love Angel?" The question was posed lightly, but she could hear the hidden intensity. He wanted to know if she was over Angel, so that he wouldn't have the shadow of his GrandSire hanging over this relationship, as it had with Dru.
Buffy took a deep breath, and gave words to what she had felt so long ago. "When... Angel walked away, I was heartbroken. But I figured something out. Who he was with a soul was not who he really was at all. He was like... a mean dog on a leash. Remove leash, Angelus. I knew that when he killed Jenny. And nothing was the same after that." "So... No. I don't love Angel, because there really is no Angel to love. Only Angelus with a leash. And I won't love a mean dog."
The grin was huge for a moment, but he tamped it down. Tried not to look too happy. "Ok. Your turn, then."
"What did you love most about Dru?"
"You'll think it's stupid."
She shrugged. "Then don't answer."
He laughed. "Oh no, luv. I'm not losing a point on this. It was when she was taking care of me. After you dropped the church on me. She'd hold me, rub my sides. I loved that." He made a face. "Then Angelus showed up and ruined it." Looked at her. "For both of us."
She smiled bitterly. "Yeah... Anyway, you're up."
"Same question. What'd you love about Captain Cardboard?"
"Um..." She laughed. "He looked... impressed with me. I was something special, and it shone in his eyes when he looked at me."
"You are special, luv. You know that, right? You're a one of a kind, wonderful, beautiful woman. Everyone who knows you has been blessed to have you in their lives."
She looked down, surprised to feel a tear streaking down her cheek. She gave a half smile. "Sometimes I just don't think so." She smiled up at him. "But lately... I've felt better about being here. With people."
He grinned. "You and me both, luv. Your turn."
"Absolute biggest regret. Survey saays?"
He laughed. "Thank you, Louie Anderson." He turned thoughtful. "Huh. I guess it would be not knocking Doc off that bloody tower when I had the chance." Now it was his turn for a tear. He brightened slightly. "Now you, what's your biggest regret, luv?"
She thought back. Through everything. "I didn't tell my mom I loved her the day she died. I know she knew, we weren't fighting, but.... ya know?"
Spike tried to hide a sniffle. His hand went to the guardian angel charm on his chain. "I never told her how much our little chats meant to me. She talked me out of staking myself more than once."
Buffy smiled, only letting herself remember happy, vibrant, loving Joyce. Not vacant stare, on the couch dead Mommy. She shuddered. Thought of her smile, and was calmed. "You're up."
He shook his head. "Nuh-uh. Your turn. I asked your biggest regret, remember? Then we got off topic."
She nodded. "Yeah. Sorry." Her eyes lit up. A sly smile curved her lip. "Most horrendous, outrageous, disgusting sexcapade?"
Time for the big blue eyes look. "What!?"
She leaned back to lie on the crypt's roof, her arms behind her head. "I don't stutter."
"Oh, alright. But I don't want anyone else to hear this." He leaned over, whispered in her ear for a long time. The more he whispered, the wider her eyes got. Finally, he finished and layed back again.
The blush that had heated her face now threatened to catch Spike on fire. She averted her gaze. "That is so sick. I did NOT expect you to answer that." She moaned. "Oh God... I'm gonna need a therapist to get the image of you and- uggggghhhh!" She shuddered. She mimed poking out her eyes.
He laughed, hard. Clutching his sides. "When you think of other questions, remember that I'm a sick, twisted individual. And a vampire, at that." He relaxed and layed back again.
She glared. "Your turn, perv-o-matic."
He laughed again. "Ok. Remember what you said about Angel earlier? The dog comment? Do you think I'm a mean dog on a leash, too?"
She shook her head. "No. You... You were gentle, loving and kind, before the chip, to Dru, or whoever. Angel couldn't have done that." She smiled. "I guess your heart is your leash, but it's a respectable one. And you're a nice dog."
He panted playfully. "And do you like nice dogs?" He scooted closer. "Like, enough to rub it's stomach?" Puppy eyes, to make the image complete. "And it's your turn."
She rolled her eyes. "When I win this game, I'll pat your belly." She thought. "Um... Favorite thing about.... Xander?"
He chuckled. "Fair enough." Made a face. "Harris? I don't like anything about him." He noticed her look. "Oh, alright. He gets off a good joke, every now and then. There, are you happy?"
She laughed. "Wow. I think you should lose a point for that lame an answer."
"Hey! I answered, didn't I?! And, if you must know. My favorite thing about Xander is how he's always there for you." He gave her a playful look. "Now, what's your favorite thing about me?"
She ran her tongue across her teeth like he always did. Then she smiled sweetly. "Awww.. I think... that you always... Um..." She blushed.
"Well?"
"But it's- I wanna pass! But I won't! It's.... ah.. how you say you love me in your sleep." She rushed it out. In one tiny breath. "What's your favorite book?"
He looked suprised for a moment. "I do? I didn't know I talked in my sleep." He grinned. "Favorite book, huh? Here's another one that you'll think is stupid. It's Alice Through The Looking Glass." He got a far away look in his eyes. "A book that's full of nonsense, and yet, somehow, makes sense. It helped me to understand Dru."
She barely hid a snort at the thought of his old mistress.
"I heard that. Now, what's your favorite color?"
She glanced at him. "Yellow. And blue. It's a tie. Yours?"
He chuckled. "You won't believe me. It's deep purple. With midnight blue as a tie."
She grinned. "To each their own."
He returned her grin. "Yeah. Now, if you could see anywhere in the universe, even another planet, what would it be?"
She said thoughtfully, "The moon. It has such a large effect on people, on evil, on.. well, everything. I guess I'd want to know why." She glanced sideways at him. "Did you ever do anything with Angel?"
"Uh, what kind of anything?"
"Any, and every kind of anything. Ya know, -ANY- thing."
"Aside from him kicking my ass, repeatedly, us hunting together, and sharing Dru sometimes, no."
Her nose crinkled up for a split second and she evened out her features. "Ok."
"I have to ask this," he said, looking at her curiously. "Remember the other day, on your bed? When you were tickling me? Did you ever do anything like that with Peaches?"
She shook her head. "Never. We hugged. Cuddled. Kissed... ya know. But no. Nothing... really... ya know."
"You never played together? Really? I can't imagine being in a relationship without playing sometimes."
She smiled sadly. "No play." Her smile slipped. "Not even fore-" She stopped. "Why do you paint your nails black?"
He held up a hand, looked at it. "Don't really know. Thought it added to my "tough vamp" image."
She giggled. "Yes, you sitting in front of the 'telly' painting your nails oh-so-carefully certainly adds to that rough and tumble image."
He chuckled. "Yeah. I've been thinking about quitting, though." He looked at her. "Ok, when you first met me, first impression."
She snorted derisively, "What the hell is this? Asshole day? Then you got kinda scary... Cuz... everybody talks big. But you fight big, too. I just... fought, and shot off my mouth for all I was worth. And prayed to whoever looked out for slayers that you'd slip up."
He squirmed around a little. "I'm not scary now, am I?"
She smiled. "You love me. I don't have to be scared of you. Would I be sitting on a roof playing Deepest Secret with someone who scared me?"
"Good point. Got a question for me?"
"First impression, me."
He grinned. "Shorter than the last one. But when we got to fighting, tell you the truth, you scared ME."
She grinned and made pumping motions with her arms. "Grrrr. Arrrgh! Who's the slayer?"
He threw his hands up. "Oh no! Save me from the terrifying Slayer!" He rolled out of the way as she reached for him. "Ahh, help, the Slayer's gonna get me!"
She punched his arm. "Don't mock the slayer. She'll get you, boy."
He laughed. "I'm kidding, luv. Now, do you have a question?"
"It's your turn. I asked impression." She laughed. "You just can't stump me."
"Oh, yeah. Like you've even been trying with me."
"Only a couple times, pervo."
He laughed again. "Ok, let me try. Uh..." He grinned. "I've got it. Do you love me?"
She grew very still. Tilted her head away from him. "Point."
"Gotcha."
"If I ever asked you, after all the Scoobies are gone, Dawn, everyone.... would you... take me? Turn me?"
His eyes grew wide. "What? Make you a vamp? Take away the soul that I love so much? Never. If you wanted, I'd kill you, then stake myself."
"No," she snarked sharply, "You wouldn't!"
It was only then that she noticed the tears in his eyes. "I wouldn't want to live without them, either, luv. But I couldn't do that to you."
She nodded. "Unfair question.. but there will be no staking if Buffy's batteries finally don't recharge."
Now the tears fell. "If none of the Scoobies were left, if you were gone, who would stop me?"
She sat up, wrapped her arms around her knees. "A soul doesn't guarantee heaven. That's horrible of me, but it's true. People go to hell all the time. You will not." Her eyes flashed at him. " I will not allow it."
He moved closer, hoping for a hug. "You really care where I wind up?"
She wrapped her arms tentatively around him. "I guess so. So no staking till you're sure of a destination."
He leaned into the hug, putting his arms around her. "Just tell me where to go to buy the tickets, luv," he whispered in her ear.
She smiled softly. "My question. I was missing a sky blue thong with sunshines embroidered in gold. Like... when Riley was around. Did you steal it?"
He leaned back and layed back down. "Yeah. But I think you blew it up when you threw the grenade down there."
She smacked his arm indignantly. "You don't even have the shame to lie! Those cost me like... half a week's allowance." She glowered at him. "For panties I only got to wear twice."
He tried, unsucessfully, to hide a chuckle. "How much? I'll pay you."
She sniffed. "About $20, with inflation."
His eyes grew wide. "TWENTY BUCKS FOR UNDERWEAR?!! Where the hell do you shop?"
She smiled coyly. "I don't believe you shop there. Money. Palm. Buffy smile."
He let out an indignant sigh. "Fine." Pulled out his wallet. Handed her a fifty. "Keep the change. I probably owe you for other articles of clothing."
Her eyes grew big. "Dawn DIDN'T swipe my blue angorra sweater??"
"No. And I still have that, but you probably don't want it back."
She made a horrified face. "Oh, God. Ask your question. Hurry."
He grinned. "Why do you think that I don't want you to have it back? The sweater, I mean."
"... You probably put it on that horrible mannequinne... or... let the Bot wear it."
He laughed. "Close, but not quite."
She took another needed deep breath. "Why do you not want me to have it back?"
"Because Harmony wore it, and I didn't want to gross you out."
She dropped her head. "You let that ho-biscuit wear my sweater?"
He laughed. "Let's just say that it was a role playing thing."
She whimpered. "Again.... your question..."
"Let's go back to simple. Are there any animals that scare you?"
"Ew!! So totally. The spiders in Sunnydale? They grew in hell, on like.... Miracle Spidey-grow. I spaz and make Dawn kill 'em."
He shuddered. "I'm so with you on that. But it's scorpians that do it to me. Probably beetles too, now."
"Beetles? ... Eww, there's one right over there?" She pointed to a corner of the ceiling.
"WHERE!!?" He leaped up, spinning in a circle with vamp speed. "Where's a beetle? I hate beetles."
She stood, walked to the corner very calmly, and squashed it with her fashionable boot. "There. Gone. That's why they call me the Slayer!"
Spike let out a sigh of relief. "Whew. Thanks, luv. It could have been one of those flesh-eaters, like the ones in that Shaman's cave. That was one of the trials."
Her eyes grew large. "My question. Do you regret the trials?"
He sat back down. "They were painful, and scary. Make that bloody terrifying. But the result is worth it. So, no. I don't regret them at all."
She nodded. Very slowly, she placed her head in his lap, her eyes staring at his jean-clad knees.
"Do you regret trying... this? A relationship, with me?" He looked down at her, stroking her hair with a gentle hand.
"Am I scared, ridiculously ashamed of myself, yes. But no. I'm... glad?" She debated her word. "Yeah. Glad that we can even attempt. Even if we can't- Anyway, I'll know we tried. For the right reasons."
He looked down at her. "I love you. And this, whatever it is, will work. We'll make it work. We've come too far to fail now."
She smiled softly, turned her head into his thigh to hide it there. Then she spoke. "While you were gone... what did you miss most about me?"
"Your smile. Even though I didn't get to see it much. It just... it makes your whole face light up. Makes you even more beautiful."
She was flustered. How did he do that? "Oh."
"What'd you miss about me?" He looked up at the stars. "Assuming you missed me at all, that is."
She scoffed. "I missed you. I mean, even when I didn't want to. And... this is... wierd, considering."
"Yeah?"
"I missed touching you. Because whenever I needed you, I just... reached out. And you were there to hold on to. I needed someone to hold onto after everything... after Willow. After... everything."
He smiled, that genuine, heart-melting smile. "I'm here now, luv. You can touch me."
She smiled. "I know." She pouted. "I can't stump you. And I'm losing."
He grinned. "Try again. Maybe you'll get lucky."
She furrowed her brow. "You never watched me... um... doing anything.. in my room, did you?"
"Anything? Like what?"
"Like... anything... not-clothed-ee."
He ducked his head. "Point."
She muttered to herself, "Point means neither yes or no.. neither yes or no...."
"That's right, luv. Just like when you said it to the "Do you love me" question."
She shot him a pointed look. "Just a tad different. Ask away."
Spike leaned back again, liking how his passing on the last question had made her squirm. "Ok. What is your favorite.... Uh, book?"
She looked at him. "Don't laugh at me." She smiled fondly and said, "Don Quixote."
He nodded. "Yeah. I liked that one too. Now there's a guy that knows what it means to be devoted to your job." He chuckled.
She grinned at him. "What do you do with the kittens you win at poker?"
He debated telling her that he ate them, but then remembered that he'd sworn to tell the truth. "Let's just say that every week or so, a basket finds it's way to the SPCA."
She laughed. Long and hard. "That's so cute. Oh my gosh... haha..."
He snorted indignantly. "It's not funny, luv. Clem wanted to eat 'em."
She gasped. "Clem?? CLEM wanted to eat those little baby kitties???" She snorted. "I had a dream once... you sired like.. a whole litter of vampire kittens to suck my blood..."
"Well, he didn't want to eat them, per say. But he had a debt to Teeth. I wouldn't let him borrow from me, though." His eyes got big. "I never thought of that. Dru sired a puppy, once. But it made the mistake of biting Angelus. Poor thing wound up nailed to a tree, waiting for sunrise."
Buffy's eyes grew wide. "How... sick." She shuddered. "You're up."
"If someone had gone back in time, to six years ago, and told you what we've been doing for the last couple of weeks, what would be the hardest for you to believe?"
She grinned. "The... un-violence of it all."
"Come on, luv. Be specific."
She sat up from his lap. "That we'd... feel... for eachother. Ya know, the helping, the lo- caring... That sort of thing. I sling the question back at you."
He grinned. She'd almost said "love". Then he thought for awhile. "I guess I'd have to say the fact that I'm in love with you, mostly. Secondly, what happened when I grabbed Mr. Gordo the other morning. I would not have believed that, the one time that the Slayer had me totally pinned, that she'd be tickling me, rather than staking me."
She smiled ruefully. "True. I would have dusted your ass six years ago. Especially if you had the gall to lay one undead finger on my pig."
He chuckled. "I believe it. Now, have you ever had a crush on a teacher? Just something I was wondering about."
A blush suffused her cheeks. "Pass, pass, pass, pass, pass..."
He grinned. "It was Rupert, wasn't it?"
She glared at him, tossed her hair. "I -said- pass. Did you- Were you a virgin when you were turned?"
Thankfully, Spike couldn't blush. But he could be embarrased. He ducked his head. "Yeah. Dru was my first, and only for over a hundred years."
She sighed, disregarding the sweetness of the statement to mull over her disgust in not being able to get him to pass. "I really freaking hate her."
He sighed. "I wish I could..." Raised his head. "When you were little, did you ever want a pet?"
She wrinkled her brow at him. "Is that your question?"
"Yeah. I thought we'd go back to the easy ones." He sighed. "And the less painful ones.."
She laid her head back in his lap, feeling more relaxed. "I wanted a pony. But I got a cat. I named him Pyewackit."
"What kind of a name is Pyewackit?", Spike said, cocking his head.
She laughed. "It's the name of the cat in the first play I ever saw. Bell, Book and Candle." She grinned at the irony. "It was about witches."
He nodded. "Oh. Makes alot more sense than my cat's name."
She smiled. "What was his name?"
"When I first started feeding him, I thought he was a she. And he was always rubbing up against me, and generally bugging the hell out of me. So I named it Harmony. But, then I found out that it was a male, so I changed it to Harmon. He's black, with white feet and a white chin and chest." He looked around. "He's gotta be around here somewhere. He never goes far from the crypt."
She turned her head from looking at his knees to look at him in surprise. "That's the first pet you've ever had??"
He grinned ruefully. "When I was human, I had terrible allergies. No animals. Not even a rat or a mouse. I'd start sneezing, get an awful headache. Harm's the first pet that I've really had. Dru had pets, and I was the one that took care of them, since she never remembered to. But they weren't mine. Harmon's MY cat."
She grinned at the pride in his voice. "Well... I guess you get two questions now."
Another grin. "Fair enough. Who's your best friend, Red, or Harris? And what did they say when you told them about our rules?"
She shrugged. "Both of them are. I used to think Xander, cuz Willow was busy, then Willow, cuz Xander was busy. Everyone has things to deal with. They both are." She grinned. "Willow almost stood and cheered. It was almost like old-Willow. Told me she thought we'd been banging, but I look happy. Xander... eh... took some convincing. He groaned, bitched, generally froze me out. Then I broke a table on accident. Got his attention."
"And then what happened?"
She turned her head toward his knees again. Said very quietly, her body still, "Xander cried."
Spike looked down at her, shock registering on his face. "What!? Why? I'd understand him wanting to stake me, but what...?"
She looked slowly into his eyes. "You've had anyone he really loved, Spike. He's just... lost. We're trying to help him find himself again."
Spike's eyes filled with tears. "I hadn't... I mean, I didn't... I have to apologize to him." A single tear ran down his cheek. "Add that to the list of pain that I've caused... And people to apologize to..." Two more tears made their way down the planes of his face. "I want to help him. What can I do?"
She shrugged. "We're just.... being there. Making him important in my training, in running the Magic Box. Anything. He feels... low." She reached up, touched a finger to his tears. "We'll fix it. That's what we do after all, isn't it?"
He blinked and sniffed. "That's what you do. I just make things worse." He sniffed again. "And it's your turn."
She sat up indignantly and shoved a hand to his chest. "What the hell is the matter with you? So who was there for Dawn, or Anya? Or me, Spike? What would have happened to me without you?"
"You're right, luv," he said, head down. "It's just... I've caused so much sorrow. What I've helped with doesn't even scratch the surface. I just... feel... so bad." Another, barely supressed sniff.
Her feeling of wanting to kick the Spike fled, and she hugged him softly, shifting to sit in his lap. "You've helped save the world twice over. That negates some badness. Your turn."
He gave a pained grin and wrapped his arms around her. "Uh-uh. I asked my two questions, you answered them, and we started this. It's your turn, luv." He planted a soft kiss on the top of her head.
She looked to his eyes. "Ok. Do you realize that before your soul you were good, and a help, and we'd have been screwed without you?"
"I was not good. I was evil," he said with an indignant snort. "The only thing that stopped me from killing the lot of you was the chip." He waited a moment, deathly serious, it seemed. But the corner of his mouth was twitching.
Buffy rolled her eyes. "I don't sit on truly ex-evil people's laps. Excuse me." She made to move from his lap. He clasped his hands around her waist, making an undead seatbelt that effectivly prevented her from moving.
She laid her hands over his, linked over her waist. "Well? C'mon.. hit me with your best shot."
"Please tell me that wasn't meant as a song cue."
She laughed. "Only if you don't ask me a question." She pouted. "You're getting boring."
He play-growled in her ear and released one hand to poke her stomach. A spot that he'd discovered on a previous night. "Boring, am I?"
She jerked. "No tickling. Your rule. Ask." She turned her head. "I'll have to use all my feminie wiles on you."
He grinned. "I'm thinking of changing that rule. It's fun, when I'm not trapped. Now, how old were you when you had your first crush? Movie stars don't count."
She tapped her chin thoughfully. "Bobby Mackenzie, kindergarten." She sighed romantically. "He shared his blue crayon with me...."
Spike fought back a chuckle, and lost. He tipped over sideways, taking the indignant Slayer with him.
She pushed at him. "Don't laugh! He was-ha! Is hot!"
He continued to laugh, still holding Buffy, his hands locked around her waist. "But... Kindergarden?" Another fit of laughter. "What were you? Five?"
She snorted. "I was smart. I got to start when I was four." She squirmed.
"You want me to let go, Slayer?" He grinned. "Make me."
Her eyes flared with the challenge. She turned to him. Ran a hand down his arm. "No," she said throatily. "Don't let me go..."
Spike's eyes grew wide, and he loosened his grip. "Rules... we have rules..", he muttered under his breath.
She inched closer, eyes hooded, "But I..."
"Rules, rules, rules..." It was a chant, now.
She pouted up at him. "Are you saying you're not gonna..." she brushed a finger across his lips.
Spike closed his eyes. The "rules, rules, rules" chant still going, but really quietly. Did she want him to kiss her? They did have kissing rules, so it wouldn't be breaking them, right? His grip loosened even more as he fought to relax a very uncooprative body part that was making his jeans uncomfortably tight in a certain area...
She leaned in, bit his earlobe softly. "You better let me go unless we're breaking rules..."
Oh, that did it. That was a weak spot, and she knew it. He released her and rolled over with his back to her. Fighting to calm himself down, quite literally.
She smiled at her victory. "Make you, indeed, Spike, hmmm?"
"Can't talk right now," he ground out. "Consentrating..." Deep breath. "Your turn..."
She tried to think on something non-sexy just because she felt bad. "Ugliest clothes you've ever worn?"
"Bellbottom pants," came the vampire's reply. His back still to her. He wasn't sure if he could look at her just yet.
She nodded. "That *would* be atrocious on you." She sighed. "Sorry," she said petulantly. "You DID say make you."
He rolled halfway over, so that he was laying on his back, arms spread wide. "Yeah, but I guess I should have been more specific. As in WHAT I wanted you to make me do." He chuckled. "Because that wasn't it."
She laughed. "Sorry..." It was totally unrepentant. "You need to be specific. Besides, it was way fun."
"Uh-huh. For you, maybe. Bloody painful for me. I need to buy looser pants. I already told you that you cheat," he said with a grin, refering to her stint as "Inviso-Buffy".
She blushed. Blinked. "Um... Your turn." She said quietly, almost to herself, "When I win this game, we're revising kissing rules."
"I heard that. What else did you do while you were invisible? Besides me."
She glanced at him for his crudeness. "Messed with the social workers head... people's heads at the park... just... had fun. Floated a pizza box."
"Ripped all the buttons off my favorite shirt..."
She grinned ferally at the thought of the sex that day. "Yeah. Way with the not sorries."
He laughed. "What's your question, luv?"
"Hmm? Oh. Uh... What do you miss most, since 'The Rules'?"
He thought. "Huh. I don't know. I really like the way we are now." He gave her a glare. "When you don't cheat, that is. But I'd have to say... Just the feeling, being with you. At the moment where we stop being two bodys, and become one. That instant. The moment that lasts forever. That's what I miss most." He chuckled. "William the Bloody Awful Poet is at it again."
She swallowed. "That's what I hated most... because I love-liked it the most."
He raised an eyebrow. "Here's your question, luv. Define "love-liked"?"
"I... got scared. Every time. It was so good, but... I didn't want it to be."
He cocked his head, reached out and gently grabbed her hand. "Scared? Of... me?"
She tucked her chin against her chest. "Of the feeling."
He sucked in a breath. Was this it? Was she going to say it? "What feeling, luv?", he whispered, feeling the warmth of her pressed up against him. Allowing a low purr to start.
She felt tears starting and was embarassed by them. "I didn't want to fall in love with you. I didn't want to feel cherished. I wanted the sex- I never let it be anything else- be so horrible, just once, so I could just... walk away." She shook her head. "I didn't want to feel your warmth."
He actually couldn't breathe, which didn't really matter. "Are you saying that you did? Fall in love with me?" He wiped away a tear from her face. "That you are still?"
She shrugged, staring at him through flooded eyes. "Everytime... it was so warm. I don't know... I just knew that I had to fight too hard to not be." She touched his cheek. "I don't... I don't want to hurt you anymore.. but I don't want to hurt me either. And I can't... do this so fast, Spike. I have to be... be ready, and it'll take time." She looked at him concernedly. "Does that hurt you?"
He held her close, rested his chin on the top of her head. "Not really, luv." He rocked gently back and forth, comforting both of them. "And don't worry about the time thing. I have time. I have forever, I think." A sigh. "I do want to hear it, but only when you can say it and mean it. Not just say it because it's what you think I want to hear."
She glanced at him. "New topic. I'm all ugly and puffy now. Why have you never been like.... really hateful to Giles? You never even tried to kill him."
"You never look ugly to me, luv." He thought for a second. "I don't really know. And I'd like to know why it was so easy for me to accept him as my Dad during the whole Randy incident. I really like Rupert." He ducked his head, embarrased. "There's a part of me that wishes that he WAS my Dad. I kind of wish that I could be like him. Have all the answers. Always be able to help, no matter what. I guess that's why."
She kissed his cheek shyly. "You always do help, no matter what."
"Thanks, luv," he said with a grin. "You don't know how much it means to me to hear you say that. I guess it's my turn, huh?"
She nodded.
"Give me your honest opinion. The old Spike, chip, no soul, versus the new Spike, chip not working, with soul."
She looked confused. "Opinion of what?"
"Me. Which one do you like better and why?"
She thought. For a long time. "I guess.... New Spike is better, because if anything happens to us, we have a good chance of staying in the same place, ya know?"
"Same place?"
She shrugged. "We could both go to heaven."
He was truly touched. "You'd really want to spend all eternity with me?"
"I think I could."
He grinned, and hugged her tightly. "That's one of the reasons I love you, Buffy. You've got such a big heart, that there's even room for a misfit like me."
She hugged him back, softly. "I think we're both misfits. Um... Do... Were you mad when I cut my hair?"
"No. A little... dissapointed that you took away one of my favorite toys, but not mad. Are we doing personal appearance questions, now?"
"Ummm.... ok?"
"Do you like my hair better straight, or curly, and why?"
She smiled, ran her hand through the locks, and mussed them. "Curly. Because that's how it looks after VERY nice sex, not to sound like Anya, and you look at me, and just.. smile. "
He looked at her, and that smile crept out, followed by a chuckle.
She looked indignant. "What?? You asked!"
He chuckled again. "I was just thinking that I like your hair after you've been sleeping on it a couple of hours. It gets all sticking up and cute. Makes me smile."
She huffed. "My hair is not sticky- uppy!"
"Not right now. Your turn, luv."
She sat apart from him a few inches, wrapped her arms around her knees. "What is... the worst thing about me?"
He looked annoyed at the sudden lack of closeness, and then her question registered. "Worst thing? You mean that there's something wrong with you? You're not perfect?"
She rolled her eyes, and pushed out a boot to toe him in the leg.
He playfully grabbed the tip of her boot and shoved it away. "Oh, ok. Let me think. If you'd asked me this six years ago, I could have written volumes. Now... I'd have to say... Your trust issue. You make it extremely hard for anyone to get close to you. But once they are, you latch on like a pit bull, and that's one of the best things about you."
She smiled, enjoying his last part. "Oh."
"Now, same question, about me."
She paused, thought hard. "It's very easy for you to express emotion. But when you realize one... especially towards someone else, you almost expect it to be that easy for them. But you're persistant in it, a big plus."
He grinned. "Ah."
She grinned back at him. "Were you really gonna crack a while ago?" She referred to the 'making him'.
He held up a hand, finger and thumb less than an inch apart. "That close, luv. You really know how to push my buttons."
She smiled seductively. "I know. Were you really gonna kiss me?"
"Walking a fine line, let's just say that. Do I get two questions, now?"
She blinked. "Crap. Yeah."
"Is there anything I do that you find cute? And, if so, why and what are they?"
She smiled immediately. "Your nose twitches in your sleep. And you swear. Uber- mean british swear words. and it's so cute, because you look like you're pouting the whole time. Your bottom lip does this...." She demonstrated with her own, pouting it out in a petulant, sexy way. "...thing-ee."
He looked suprised. "I do? I didn't know that. Do I do anything else that I should know about?"
She smiled, a strictly knowing, female smile. "No."
He made a mental note to reask this question later. "Fair enough. Your turn."
She wrinkled her nose in thought. "What do you think is... like, the... um... sexiest thing about me? If I am, I mean." God, she berated herself. Way to sound experienced and worldly.
He gave her a gentle hug. "First of all, of course you are. Hasn't anyone ever told you that?"
"No?"
"Well here then. You are the sexiest woman that I've ever known."
Her smile was wide, but she tamped it down quickly. "Thank you."
He grinned. "And, to answer the question. You have this... attitude. This feeling of power and strength that just floats around you. I don't know about anyone else, but that does it for me. Also, there's this little thing you do, when you flip your hair out of your eyes. I've always found that extremely sexy."
She nodded, then grinned at him, and flipped her hair out of her eyes.
Spike groaned and layed back, almost causing the Slayer to topple off his lap. "That's it, now look what you've gone and done! You've taken me down with your womanly ways!" He layed his hand across his forehead melodramaticly. And then winked at her playfully.
She gave a small laugh, then leaned forward and kissed him, moving her lips across his, feeling very much a punch of desire, but a warmth that tempered it.
Spike held the kiss for an eternal moment, something to hold on to until the next time, then they pulled away at the same time. "Wow. Thanks, luv. I wasn't expecting that."
She sat on his lap, a bit farther back. "Neither did I. I keep pushing rules."
"I won't tell, if you won't."
She grinned. "We're gonna have to revise the kissing rules."
"Let's put that on the agenda.." He glanced at the horizon, suprised to see the first hint of sunrise. "For tomorrow. We've been playing this game all night!"
She frowned. "I was going to ask you if you wanted to stay the day at the house... I'm sorry. It's a little late now, huh?"
He grinned. "Let me run inside, and grab my blanket, and we'll make a run for it. It's only a couple of blocks, after all. And the sun's got a ways to go before it becomes harmful. We can finish the game at the house, if you want?"
She smiled at him. "Hurry. Dusty Spike is an automatic loser."