Hyrule: Caught On Camera!
A Fanfic by Sheik
Disclaimer: See Chapter 1
As always, please ask me before using place names, made-up characters, or any ideas from my fic! Enjoy!
¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤ ¤¤¤¤
Day 2: Link has finally found something to tape. Or has he?
¤ It is Day two out of Link's week with the camera, and he still has not found a plot. Instead, he is taping everyone and everything that he deems worth watching. Today's locale: Lon Lon Ranch. ¤
¤ The camera turns on. We see Link's face. His hair is being blown around, and he is squinting. We hear the noise of wind very loudly. Evidently he is riding on Epona. Even though he is shouting, we can barely hear him. The date-and time display, evidently affected by Saria's attack, is now fading in and out, looking like it is some kind of static. It now reads:
Dec. 31, 0000
12:00 FM ¤
Link: Hello again, and welcome to Epona Cam! I'm, well, me. Anyways, here we are in Hyrule Field. What is there to see? Let's find out!
¤ Link turns the camera around so we can see…Epona's neck. We go for about two minutes before Link realizes what the viewer can see. ¤
Link: CRAP!!!
¤ Link moves the camera (very poorly, as always) so that now we only see Epona's neck every now and then on the left side of the screen. ¤
¤ We go on like this for about three minutes until the camera shuts off and we see a shot of Lon Lon Ranch. Link is terrorizing cuccos, trying to make them chase after him. ¤
Link: Aw, come on! That always makes you mad! Why aren't you chasing me!? I can't believe this! Why is it that I can never get you guys to attack me when I WANT you to!?!?!?!?
¤ It is this lovely scene in which Malon comes onto the scene; having just rounded up the cuccos into their pen (a very hard thing to do), she is looking to deal with the person who just let them out again. As soon as she spots Link, the rodeo begins. ¤
Malon: LINK!!! So it was YOU! I should have guessed! Get back here right now and stop killing the cuccos!!!
Link: Gack!
¤ The camera shuts off. Next it seems that Link is near the entrance to Lon Lon Ranch. He is trying to get a shot of Malon, who does not seem all too thrilled about it, aside from the fact that she is busy doing her chores. ¤
Malon: ¤ Still looking down ¤ Cut that out, Link. You know I'm busy, or I'd be glad to have you tape me. Come back later and you can tape all you want here!
¤ Link does not listen, rather he moves closer to Malon as she is lifting a small crate of Lon Lon Milk. Malon looks at Link, sets the crate back down again, and walks up the camera. ¤
Malon: Link, need I remind you that I have a black belt in Tae Kwon Do? Now stop taping me this instant, or you'll be sorry!
¤ Link does not listen, but he does back off a little. ¤
Malon: Argh! Why do men NEVER listen!?
Link: Eep! Look! It's a cucco! I….Uhh….why don't I tape that?
¤ Link begins to turn around with the camera, but it is too late. Malon is on the warpath, and when she is like that, it is best to be out of the way. She lets loose a potentially deadly punch directly at the lens of the camera. The last thing we see before the camera blacks out is Malon's fist and the beginnings of a huge crack in the lens. We see lots of static and then the camera dies. ¤
Day 3: Angry Ranchers and Their Consequences
¤ We see a shot of Link entering the Hylian electronics store: HyliaTronics Incorporated. As this particular segment is shot by a professional camera crew, we guess that Malon thwacked the camera especially hard. Link enters the store and is immediately greeted by a great array of beeping, bleeping, ringing, and of course, people talking VERY loudly. Link is carrying the HCOC official camera carrying case; and he is pretty bruised up: he has a black eye, a huge scratch on the size of his face, and his left arm is wrapped up in bandages. Link walks up to the electronics repair desk and rings a bell. ¤
Link: ¤ singing softly to himself ¤ Nah-veee: for those who think dumb! Hey, where is this guy?
¤ Link rings the bell again, a little louder. ¤
Link: Come on, come ON!
¤ Link waits about five seconds, then starts abusing the poor little bell and shouting. ¤
Link: HELLO, THERE!?!? IS ANYBODY HOME!? COME ON, I NEED SERV-ICE!!!!!!
Female Voice: All right, all right, I'm coming already!
¤ A young woman about Link's age enters from the back room behind the counter. She has LONG black hair, large violet eyes, and a smile that would melt iron. Her HyliaTronics, Inc. nametag reads "Hello, my name is Syrie!" She is wearing a standard women's uniform: Green skirt, white short-sleeved blouse, and brown boots. Link's eyes immediately turn into large red hearts with triforces on them, and he is surrounded by red hearts on a pink background. The vision fades as the girl speaks, but Link's eyes are shining brightly and he has the dopiest look on his face that anyone has ever seen. ¤
Syrie: Hi, there! How can I help you?
Link: Ahhh…… such a beautiful voice…..
Syrie: Excuse me?
Link: It's like heaven……
¤ Syrie blushes a little, but pretends that she can't understand a word Link is saying. ¤
Syrie: Is there anything I can help you with, Sir?
¤ Link suddenly comes to and turns as red as the hearts that we saw just a moment ago. ¤
Link: Uh…. Yeah…. What was it? Oh, yeah! The camera! I need this repaired as soon as possible.
¤ Link opens the bag to reveal the camera: the front of which looks like a totaled car after a severe accident. The lens is not even there, but a few shards are left around the bashed-in rim. ¤
Syrie: Well, what happened here?
Link: Angry ranchers.
Syrie: ¤ Laughing ¤ What did you do?
Link: What does it look like?
Syrie: Right. Sorry. Well, how soon do you need it back?
Link: As soon as possible: tomorrow, preferably.
Syrie: I'll see what I can do. Can you wait here while I take it out back to investigate?
Link: Of course.
¤ Syrie picks up the camera and the bag, and takes both back into the room which she entered from. We see various shots of Link drumming his fingers on the counter, reading the return policy from a poster, and rehearsing various pickup lines. As Syrie finally emerges, a subtitle reading "Ten Minutes Later' appears for a moment on the bottom of the screen and then fades again as Syrie speaks. ¤
Syrie: I can get it to you tomorrow, but it's gonna cost you, I'm afraid. Your camera is the victim of "Angry Rancher Rage"- the fifth case this month, although several are from foreign ranches. This is by far the worst, though.
Link: Well, I'm afraid to ask, but how much will it cost?
Syrie: Well… Uh…. The best I can do is three hundred rupees.
Link: WHAT!?
Syrie: Sorry, but you know, employees get a fifteen per cent discount, and I can use it for you, if you'll do something for me in return.
Link: And what would that be?
Syrie: Are you doing anything tomorrow evening, say…… Seven O'clock?
Link: Well, that depends. Are you asking me out?
Syrie: ¤ Her face turns a bright red. ¤ Yeah, kinda…hehehe
Link: Well, then I'm saying "sure", so I guess we're both doing something tomorrow night now.
Syrie: ¤ Giggling ¤ I guess so…
Link: How about Gandola's Deli?
Syrie: I love that place! Gandola's it is!
Link: See you then!
Syrie: Okay, bye.
¤ Link exits the store, wearing that dopey look on his face again, and floating about three feet off the ground. Behind him Syrie is talking and giggling with her orange-haired friend who works in the office supplies department. ¤
A Fanfic by Sheik
Disclaimer: See Chapter 1
As always, please ask me before using place names, made-up characters, or any ideas from my fic! Enjoy!
¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤ ¤¤¤¤
Day 2: Link has finally found something to tape. Or has he?
¤ It is Day two out of Link's week with the camera, and he still has not found a plot. Instead, he is taping everyone and everything that he deems worth watching. Today's locale: Lon Lon Ranch. ¤
¤ The camera turns on. We see Link's face. His hair is being blown around, and he is squinting. We hear the noise of wind very loudly. Evidently he is riding on Epona. Even though he is shouting, we can barely hear him. The date-and time display, evidently affected by Saria's attack, is now fading in and out, looking like it is some kind of static. It now reads:
Dec. 31, 0000
12:00 FM ¤
Link: Hello again, and welcome to Epona Cam! I'm, well, me. Anyways, here we are in Hyrule Field. What is there to see? Let's find out!
¤ Link turns the camera around so we can see…Epona's neck. We go for about two minutes before Link realizes what the viewer can see. ¤
Link: CRAP!!!
¤ Link moves the camera (very poorly, as always) so that now we only see Epona's neck every now and then on the left side of the screen. ¤
¤ We go on like this for about three minutes until the camera shuts off and we see a shot of Lon Lon Ranch. Link is terrorizing cuccos, trying to make them chase after him. ¤
Link: Aw, come on! That always makes you mad! Why aren't you chasing me!? I can't believe this! Why is it that I can never get you guys to attack me when I WANT you to!?!?!?!?
¤ It is this lovely scene in which Malon comes onto the scene; having just rounded up the cuccos into their pen (a very hard thing to do), she is looking to deal with the person who just let them out again. As soon as she spots Link, the rodeo begins. ¤
Malon: LINK!!! So it was YOU! I should have guessed! Get back here right now and stop killing the cuccos!!!
Link: Gack!
¤ The camera shuts off. Next it seems that Link is near the entrance to Lon Lon Ranch. He is trying to get a shot of Malon, who does not seem all too thrilled about it, aside from the fact that she is busy doing her chores. ¤
Malon: ¤ Still looking down ¤ Cut that out, Link. You know I'm busy, or I'd be glad to have you tape me. Come back later and you can tape all you want here!
¤ Link does not listen, rather he moves closer to Malon as she is lifting a small crate of Lon Lon Milk. Malon looks at Link, sets the crate back down again, and walks up the camera. ¤
Malon: Link, need I remind you that I have a black belt in Tae Kwon Do? Now stop taping me this instant, or you'll be sorry!
¤ Link does not listen, but he does back off a little. ¤
Malon: Argh! Why do men NEVER listen!?
Link: Eep! Look! It's a cucco! I….Uhh….why don't I tape that?
¤ Link begins to turn around with the camera, but it is too late. Malon is on the warpath, and when she is like that, it is best to be out of the way. She lets loose a potentially deadly punch directly at the lens of the camera. The last thing we see before the camera blacks out is Malon's fist and the beginnings of a huge crack in the lens. We see lots of static and then the camera dies. ¤
Day 3: Angry Ranchers and Their Consequences
¤ We see a shot of Link entering the Hylian electronics store: HyliaTronics Incorporated. As this particular segment is shot by a professional camera crew, we guess that Malon thwacked the camera especially hard. Link enters the store and is immediately greeted by a great array of beeping, bleeping, ringing, and of course, people talking VERY loudly. Link is carrying the HCOC official camera carrying case; and he is pretty bruised up: he has a black eye, a huge scratch on the size of his face, and his left arm is wrapped up in bandages. Link walks up to the electronics repair desk and rings a bell. ¤
Link: ¤ singing softly to himself ¤ Nah-veee: for those who think dumb! Hey, where is this guy?
¤ Link rings the bell again, a little louder. ¤
Link: Come on, come ON!
¤ Link waits about five seconds, then starts abusing the poor little bell and shouting. ¤
Link: HELLO, THERE!?!? IS ANYBODY HOME!? COME ON, I NEED SERV-ICE!!!!!!
Female Voice: All right, all right, I'm coming already!
¤ A young woman about Link's age enters from the back room behind the counter. She has LONG black hair, large violet eyes, and a smile that would melt iron. Her HyliaTronics, Inc. nametag reads "Hello, my name is Syrie!" She is wearing a standard women's uniform: Green skirt, white short-sleeved blouse, and brown boots. Link's eyes immediately turn into large red hearts with triforces on them, and he is surrounded by red hearts on a pink background. The vision fades as the girl speaks, but Link's eyes are shining brightly and he has the dopiest look on his face that anyone has ever seen. ¤
Syrie: Hi, there! How can I help you?
Link: Ahhh…… such a beautiful voice…..
Syrie: Excuse me?
Link: It's like heaven……
¤ Syrie blushes a little, but pretends that she can't understand a word Link is saying. ¤
Syrie: Is there anything I can help you with, Sir?
¤ Link suddenly comes to and turns as red as the hearts that we saw just a moment ago. ¤
Link: Uh…. Yeah…. What was it? Oh, yeah! The camera! I need this repaired as soon as possible.
¤ Link opens the bag to reveal the camera: the front of which looks like a totaled car after a severe accident. The lens is not even there, but a few shards are left around the bashed-in rim. ¤
Syrie: Well, what happened here?
Link: Angry ranchers.
Syrie: ¤ Laughing ¤ What did you do?
Link: What does it look like?
Syrie: Right. Sorry. Well, how soon do you need it back?
Link: As soon as possible: tomorrow, preferably.
Syrie: I'll see what I can do. Can you wait here while I take it out back to investigate?
Link: Of course.
¤ Syrie picks up the camera and the bag, and takes both back into the room which she entered from. We see various shots of Link drumming his fingers on the counter, reading the return policy from a poster, and rehearsing various pickup lines. As Syrie finally emerges, a subtitle reading "Ten Minutes Later' appears for a moment on the bottom of the screen and then fades again as Syrie speaks. ¤
Syrie: I can get it to you tomorrow, but it's gonna cost you, I'm afraid. Your camera is the victim of "Angry Rancher Rage"- the fifth case this month, although several are from foreign ranches. This is by far the worst, though.
Link: Well, I'm afraid to ask, but how much will it cost?
Syrie: Well… Uh…. The best I can do is three hundred rupees.
Link: WHAT!?
Syrie: Sorry, but you know, employees get a fifteen per cent discount, and I can use it for you, if you'll do something for me in return.
Link: And what would that be?
Syrie: Are you doing anything tomorrow evening, say…… Seven O'clock?
Link: Well, that depends. Are you asking me out?
Syrie: ¤ Her face turns a bright red. ¤ Yeah, kinda…hehehe
Link: Well, then I'm saying "sure", so I guess we're both doing something tomorrow night now.
Syrie: ¤ Giggling ¤ I guess so…
Link: How about Gandola's Deli?
Syrie: I love that place! Gandola's it is!
Link: See you then!
Syrie: Okay, bye.
¤ Link exits the store, wearing that dopey look on his face again, and floating about three feet off the ground. Behind him Syrie is talking and giggling with her orange-haired friend who works in the office supplies department. ¤