(AN: Believe it or not, I'm really trying to finish this gosh-darn fic. So just hang on a bit longer. This chapter begins with the two last sentences of chapter eleven, just so you know where we left off. They're in italics, as are Kimirah's thoughts and Zel's thoughts, by the way. Aaaaand…I don't own the song lyrics used here. )
Royal Blunders
Chapter Thirteen: Love Is Not Perfect, It's More Like Coffee
"Eight minutes and I'm losing it a little bit
Five minutes and my descriptions not starting to fit
Here we go and I'm forgetting all that I've ever known
I won't be standing up for long
I better learn how to crawl."
~ Flat On The Floor, Nickelback
'What the hell…?'
Kimirah nodded matter-factly, even though he couldn't see. 'What they see is love.'
Zelgadis eyed the canopy of leaves and vines above him with a fixed stare. "What are you talking about?" he said aloud. He could hear a "tsk"-ing sound from Kimirah.
Do you not understand the meaning of the word? Kimirah asked impatiently. Love. L-O-V-E. A deep, tender, indescribable feeling toward a person. An expression of one's affection. Get it?
Zelgadis could only stare into the sky rather than utter a response.
Kimirah groaned. Let me try this in terms you might be able to understand. Umm…Zelgadis could hear a tapping sound, as though Kimirah was deeply pondering the matter by drumming her fingernails on stone.
Okay….uh….love…love…is…
Suddenly, Zelgadis heard a clapping sound. Oh, I know! You love coffee! So…uh…coffee equals love!
A very heavy sounding facefault occurred immediately after this ridiculous proclamation. Zelgadis found himself smashed into the ground. He could hear a sheepish laugh from Kimirah.
Okay, so maybe coffee wasn't the best choice of words…
After disengaging himself from the broken concrete, Zelgadis dusted off his shirt and pants while giving an exasperated sigh. Now that I'm certain you have no skill in clarification, I can leave.
Hold it right there, Mister!
As though the sinking feeling in his stomach had suddenly become solid, Zelgadis found himself tripping over his own feet and falling forward onto the ground again. Face flat in the dirt, he could only attempt to mutter a string of curses. He managed to lift up his dirt-stained face. "Damn you, Kimirah…quit doing that!!"
Doing what? Came the annoyingly innocent reply. I can't help being psychic. (Zelgadis heard a tiny cough, as though to suggest that she was lying.) If you would be quiet, sit still and listen, I just might let you go.
Zelgadis lifted himself up and plopped down grumpily on the side of the fountain, sitting cross-legged and staring moodily at the ground. Fine.
What can I say to make you understand? The priestess sounded pained. This isn't something you're good at, is it. It's something you have never experienced before, yet it's been there all along, but you were too scared to recognize it.
I'll tell you what you can say…thought Zelgadis sulkily. You can answer me this. How could I possibly be in…in love…if I'm so annoyed with her?
Did I ever say love was perfect?
No…In spite of the situation, Zelgadis managed to smirk up at the canopy. You said it's like coffee.
It was Kimirah's turn to facefault, and she did so, allowing Zelgadis to hear the loud flump! of her falling sideways on wherever she was standing. I didn't mean that—I was trying to—that's not the POINT! Zelgadis had to enjoy a chuckle at her expense.
Kimirah sighed. Now, listen, Zelgadis…love is not perfect. It is difficult. It tears your heart into pieces at times. But that's the way it's supposed to be. Love is not all ups, nor is it all downs. If you would just talk to Amelia, you would understand how wonderful it is when you've healed from the scar it's given you.
Oh, yeah? Zelgadis answered. If YOU would just talk to Amelia, you would see how upset she was when I left.
Hmmph. Well, that was all your fault.
Zelgadis sweatdropped. My fault? Aloud, he replied, "You have a point…I was the one who made her that way…but how could she forget that?" The way he had phrased it sounded strange even to himself.
Amelia is not the type to hold a grudge. Particularly not for the man she loves.
….What?
Kimirah laughed happily. 'What', he says. Exactly what I said.
How do you know she…?
A sly chuckle came through as the answer. Since I doubt you would want me to say "Sore wa himitsu desu", I'm simple going to say "Sources."
Zelgadis stared straight ahead. …Right…as if that's not creepy at all…
Kimirah huffed. Don't even say "Mazoku". Because I'm not.
…Stalker, then.
I am NOT! was the angry outburst. Good god, you just don't trust anyone, do you?
Zelgadis scoffed, but there was nothing in his voice to discourage the fact that he was flustered. Well, then, how am I possibly supposed to take your word for it?
You won't have to. Kimirah's voice faded for a moment as the sound of footsteps on stone overlapped, and Zelgadis heard a shuffling noise. You can ask her yourself.
How?
Wait for her, replied Kimirah. She's here.
…;::..;::*::;..::;…
"Are you sure this is the right way, Lina-san?"
Amelia was hanging back behind Lina and Gourry, biting her lip tentatively. The thought of losing Zelgadis's tracks made her apprehensive of a wrong turn.
Lina stopped and looked over her shoulder, narrowing her eyes. "Would you calm down, Amelia? That's about the fifth time you've asked me. Would I be going this way if I was unsure?"
"That's not the point, Lina-san!" Amelia hurried to catch up to the two of them. "I want to make sure you didn't make a mistake." She caught herself and smiled shamefacedly. "I mean, just in case, you know!"
Lina tilted her head and turned around completely. "Adara said he headed north. She saw him just as he left. Is that enough for you?"
"I guess so…"
Gourry suddenly smiled. "Don't worry about it, Amelia. We'll find him pretty soon. If he gets moody on us, we can always have Lina kick him back to Seyruun."
Both girls stared at Gourry for a second, and then Amelia began to laugh. "Thanks, Gourry-san," giggled Amelia.
Lina punched Gourry's arm for good measure—there was no way he could ever get away with a Lina joke, even if it did actually make her laugh. "You're right about the kicking thing, Gourry, but I really have no idea what exactly we're looking for. Zel's bound to have stopped somewhere, but where, I don't know…"
"Wasn't he looking for his cure?" asked Gourry.
"What else?" scoffed Lina, but Amelia looked thoughtful on that.
"Lina-san, where's the first place Zelgadis-san would look for a cure?" Amelia's eyes darted back and forth across the horizon, as though she were looking for something.
"Um…if I know him well enough, I'd say…a library, a city with lots of stores, a temple, a really creepy, depressing guild…the possibilities are endless."
"So does that mean that Zelgadis-san might have passed by here?" said Amelia curiously, pointing up to the looming, ancient-looking stone temple rising up before them.
Lina blinked at the amazingly convenient placement of the temple. "Wow. Talk about your good timing."
Amelia clasped her hands together eagerly. "Great, we can go inside and ask someone if they've seen him! C'mon!" She ran on ahead until she reached the walkway into the temple, marveling at its majestic structure. She fiddled with the carpet of moss and vines snaking all over the doorway before walking inside.
"Hey, Amelia, wait up!" shouted Lina, pursuing the princess at top speed, determined not to be left behind. Gourry followed at a more subdued pace.
"Wow…" breathed Amelia, gazing admiringly at the interior design of the temple as she walked, her feet making a tapping sound against the multicolored cobblestone floor. She was even more so awestruck at the way the walls seemed to move, as a swirling sea of white and shimmering amber.
"Geez, could you possibly wait for us, Amel—wow…" exclaimed Lina upon arriving in the room seconds after Amelia and staring with the same somewhat overwhelmed expression as Amelia. Gourry was right behind her.
"Look at that, Lina…" Gourry gaped at the beauty of the walls, clearly enraptured.
Amelia slowly raised her hand to catch one of the wavering streaks of light, and her mouth parted slightly. "What kind of room is this?"
Gourry wandered closer to the wall. "It's kinda liquidy, isn't it…." His hand stretched slowly towards the wall. "It's almost like—"
As soon as his hand touched the film, Lina and Amelia heard a loud zapping sound. Both turned around to find the wall rippling slightly, and sticking out of it, a pair of frantically kicking legs covered by familiar blue armor. Lina smacked a hand against her forehead and groaned emphatically. "Gourry!"
…;::..;::*::;..::;…
"What do you mean, 'she's here'?" said Zelgadis aloud and abruptly, looking around. "She can't possibly be here…"
Why ever not? asked the priestess.
Because Lina wouldn't let her go looking for me on her own, Zelgadis answered in his head.
Oh, don't worry, Lina and Gourry are here too.
Zelgadis blinked. Lina's here? His eyes closed briefly as comprehension dawned on him. Oh, great.
What?
Zelgadis glared up at the sky. She's going to Fireball the crap out of me. And I could've left, if you hadn't kept me here, bending my ear for so long, Zelgadis added vehemently.
Kimirah made an angry noise. Just because YOU think you don't have to listen to someone who's trying to help you doesn't mean you can blame your future Fireballing problems on them! So unless you would like to find yourself six feet under again, you should sit down and PAY ATTENTION.
Zelgadis sat down quickly on the crumbled fountain side. Sitting. In spite of the threat, he had to grumble. I think you're copying off of Lina.
The priestess cleared her throat loudly.
Zelgadis sat up straight, rapt, and as at attention as possible. So, you were saying?
Yes, as I was saying, before I was so rudely insulted—Zelgadis fought the urge to sneer—Amelia will not hold a grudge against you. Why do you think she's looking for you?
I was thinking, began Zelgadis in a tone that was just a tad too sardonic, that maybe it would be for the same purpose as Lina.
And by that, you mean kicking the crap out of you?
Zelgadis nodded fervently.
I'm not in the least surprised that you have the littlest faith in her, Kimirah said briskly. You are a man who does not exactly bleed faithfulness.
What are you talking about? Zelgadis stood up. Do you think I search every single day for a cure…just for fun?? What do you take me for??
That's not what I meant. Kimirah's brashness had faded to a soft, patient tone. In truth, she sounded almost sad. I do not think you look for a cure just for fun. I think you want to be human again. Very much.
Then why, asked Zelgadis, angry that she could be taking his ambitions merely for play, do you think I don't exactly 'bleed faithfulness'?! All I've been trying to do for more than three years is find the remedy to this. He made an impatient gesture to his body. Every time I get close, something happens and I lose it again. There is nothing I want more than to be human again. And I've been trying to be devoted to that cause for…too long to remember. So don't tell me I'm unfaithful.
I don't mean to. Kimirah heaved a sigh. It seemed as though she were trying very hard to speak any more. I mean…you're running.
Oh, what, from Amelia? Said Zelgadis in a angry, mocking tone. Is that what you're going to say?
That's exactly what I was going to say.
For once in this conversation, Zelgadis could not think of a single thing to say. The fact that the answer to his speech was such a short reply, and not in the least as complex and annoying as he had expected, came shockingly. Also, the fact that she had agreed with him was most definitely a first.
Don't you see? You want to look human. Amelia wants you to have human feelings. They're keeping you from finding the way to look human. And you don't think that what Amelia wants you to be will ever be better than what you dreamed of. She sighed heavily. What I meant when I said you were not faithful…
Caught up in hanging onto her words, in hopes that they might provide an answer, Zelgadis did not even dare to breathe.
…was that you are quite unfaithful…to what Amelia wants. And you don't know this, but…
As if on cue, Zelgadis slowly pulled Amelia's bracelet from his cloak pocket and ran his thumb over the jewel, tracing the lines of the white star inside it.
What she wants is what you want. Do you know what that means, O Emotion-Challenged One?
Zelgadis stared up at the green canopy with a slightly resentful expression. The sky was peppered with stars. No…I don't. Are you going to tell me?
He heard a small chuckle coming from Kimirah's end. The only person with the right to explain that to you can be Amelia. You just stay there, Zelgadis Graywords.
Zelgadis heard a strange clicking noise, and within the second, realized that Kimirah had broken the connection. "Wait a minute! How am I supposed to…?"
But there was silence.
…;::..;::*::;..::;…
"Pull harder, Lina-san!"
"I'm trying!"
"I'm bored…"
"Shut up, Gourry."
The straining groans and yanks were coming from Amelia and Lina, who were pulling, with all their might, on Gourry's legs to try and pull him out. The occasional sigh of boredom came from Gourry, who was hanging from the middle of a wall, stuck, of his accord, between two rooms.
Of course, that didn't keep Gourry from making Lina want to rip his hair out. If she could even reach his hair, anyway.
"Lina, don't you have some magic you could use to get me out?" Gourry squirmed inside the hole. "My legs are starting to feel numb."
"Gourry, if you don't shut up, I'm going to burn your legs OFF," interrupted Lina savagely, yanking on his legs even harder ("OW!"). "And even if I DID have some magic to get you out, I wouldn't use it, because this is all your fault. So unless you want your legs fried off, you would do well to just be quiet."
"But, Lina—"
"LEGS FRIED OFF."
"Gotcha, Lina."
Amelia stopped to catch her breath. "You shouldn't get so mad at Gourry-san, Lina-san," she said. "It's not his fault. He didn't know the wall could….uh….suck you into it by touch."
"Well," began Lina, leaning forward to yank on Gourry's foot, "He could learn—" she yanked his foot ("OW!") "—to show—" she yanked harder ("HEY!") "—respect—" she yanked again, pulling as hard as she could ("AH-AHH!") "—for things he doesn't understand." She dusted her hands off in satisfaction as Gourry whimpered slightly.
"You have a point…Lina-san…a rather painful one, though," she added sympathetically, giving Gourry's legs a pitiful look. She sighed a little, starting to worry. "If we don't get him out soon, we might miss a chance to find Zelgadis-san's whereabouts…." She glanced nervously around the reflected room.
Lina gave the princess a softened look. "Don't worry about it, Amelia. We'll have him out soon enou—"
No sooner had she uttered these words, then the wall began to open up slightly, swallowing Gourry whole. Before his legs completely disappeared, Lina grabbed hold of his feet. "Where—do you think—you're going—Gourry!?" she said through gritted teeth.
Amelia gasped and snatched at Lina, pulling her back by her arms, but then, all three of them felt a violent jerk around their stomachs, and flew through the hole, each hanging onto the one in front as they crashed into the next room. The wall shuddered, and then folded itself up again with a gentle ripple.
Lina was in the middle of the heap that was Amelia, Gourry, and herself. Her face was smushed into Gourry's shoulder blade. "Mmnn errffmm mimmh."
Amelia managed to lift up her head. "What, Lina-san?"
"Mmnn errffmm mimmh," repeated Lina from the depths of Gourry's shoulder.
"….What?'
"MMNN ERRFFMM MIMMH!"
Amelia, still not getting a word Lina was saying, hopped off of her back and watched her look up.
"I said….get off of me…"
Amelia grinned sheepishly. "Kinda late for that, Lina-san." She held out a hand and Lina took it, dusting herself off and nudging Gourry with the tip of her foot.
"Hey, Gourry…get up."
The muffled reply came. "Mmgerff…I dun wann' go t'school today, Mom…stay home, 'n bake cookies wif'you…"
Lina shook her head in disdain as Amelia giggled. "That falling through must've given him a bonk on the head. Of course, this is almost normal speech for him…" She instantly wrapped her arms around his chest and dragged him off the floor over to the wall, and leaned him up against the bricks. Her expression softened as she looked at his dopey, unconscious face. "Poor guy."
Amelia was going to ask where this new, tender nature had come from when she heard footsteps behind her. She turned around and stood up with Lina to find a young woman, barely as tall as herself, wearing violet-shaded robes and a weary expression. Immediately, Amelia's attention was drawn to the girls' crystal-like eyes…where had she seen them before…?
"Who are you?" asked Lina, taking the initiative, as always.
The young woman smiled, folding her hands in the folds of her robes. Her long, twirling brown-blonde hair quavered when she moved. "I am Kimirah, the Head Shrine Maiden of this temple. Don't worry, you're not the only ones to get trapped in here," she said, gesturing to the room they were in.
That comforted Amelia quite a bit. "Thank you very much, Kimirah! I'm Amelia Wil Tesla Seyruun, Princess of—"
"Seyruun Princess?" said Kimirah, sweeping a quick look over Amelia and smiling somewhat secretively. This made Amelia a bit nervous, but Kimirah covered up the gesture with a serene nod. "You're looking for that man—" Amelia's stomach fluttered with hope—" Zelgadis…"
"Graywords!" exclaimed Amelia excitedly. "You've seen him?"
"Where is he?" demanded Lina with a fierce look that alluded to her plans in store for Zelgadis.
Kimirah looked very satisfied in hearing that her assumption was correct. She beckoned to the wavering wall. "He is still here."
"He's…he's h-here?" Amelia said quietly, utterly overjoyed but trying to suppress her butterfly-ridden stomach-y feeling. "Can you…could you show us?" she asked gracefully, but with a shaky tone.
"Absolutely," answered Kimirah, looking as though the pleasure could not be more welcomed than now, "Please, follow me."
…;::..;::*::;..::;…
Zelgadis was pacing back and forth in front of the damaged fountain. Over an hour ago, he had wanted nothing more than to leave this gods-damned temple, and now he was apprehensive of leaving, should he run unto Amelia, or worse, the fire-breathing sorceress herself.
"Damn her…that shrine maiden…talking my ear off, then daring to leave me in the dark again!" He stopped to look and ponder over Amelia's bracelet again. "I shouldn't have come here." He paused and looked up to gaze at the starlit sky. "And….yet…"
…;::..;::*::;..::;…
"In here." Kimirah undid the small gate padlock, and it swung open on unoiled hinges, making a long creaking noise that made Amelia jump.
Kimirah looked at her rather kindly. "Go ahead. But you two…" she looked at Lina and Gourry, Lina looking ready to pummel the first stony swordsman to come out of the garden, "You two should wait."
Lina opened her mouth to protest, but was stopped by a warning look from Gourry. She sighed plaintively. "Fine."
Kimirah looked slyly at the two of them as Amelia locked the gate behind her and went on into the garden's darkness. "I think we have a lot we could talk about."
Amelia's descent down the little cobblestone pathway led to a well-lit garden, paved with vines, statuettes, and a beautiful canopy of leaves and vines, and…her mouth parted in amazement as she saw the tall figure standing alongside the fountain, staring avidly at the sky, clenching a small, familiar bracelet.
She ventured forth after a moment's hesitation. "….Ze…Zelgadis-san?"
The chimera turned towards her with a similar look of astonishment, and, though it was hard to see, relief. "Amelia?"
(I sincerely hope you liked. I tried to make it better than chapter twelve, the teaser chapter. Wanna know something random? I just now realized that "Kimirah" sounds almost exactly like "chimera". *blink* That's cool…in a freaky, meaningless way, I guess…Oh, and to The Flower Girl: Shira's actually not dead. ^^ She's been focusing on Inuyasha-ness. I command you to go see!!! ^^
My story has kind of morphed from the humor I originally intended. But I still like it. I hope you do. ^^ Till next chapter. ~ Tams.)