*********
A House Divided
Chapter Six
*********
A lone figure stood in front of the massive San Francisco bay, a silhouette against the crisp blue sky. The wind whipped at her hair, which flew out behind her in a fiery streak. She was motionless, enraptured by the movement of the white-crested waves and puffy clouds. On her left was the bright red Golden Gate bridge and behind her the grounds of Starfleet Academy.
Beverly Crusher wandered down here early each morning on her way to work at HQ. She loved the Academy grounds, though she hated the way cadets ogled her as she walked by. She'd happily given several guest lectures while she was back on Earth, and no one made a splash at the Academy like officers returned from deep space. It were as if you'd come back with a different aura, one the cadets longed to acquire for themselves. So she always came early before classes began. Gazing at the bay calmed her soul, which was in a massive knot.
She turned as she heard someone call her name. 'Please don't let it be any kind of administrator.' Pasting a helplessly phony smile on her face she turned. It quickly became genuine as she recognized the owner of the voice. "Boothby!" She embraced him warmly.
"I'm going to put you to work if you keep showing up here every morning." His grizzled countenance was contorted into a smile and his eyes gleamed. She'd started coming here early in the morning some months ago, and they'd begun striking up conversation. Last month they'd discovered their mutual friendship with Jean-Luc and from that point on had been fast friends. "I should have known that anyone who could put up with talking to me every morning would be someone who had already been putting up with that old grump for years." Boothby had then favored her with a crooked smile, and she'd become used to starting her morning with him. A poor substitute for Jean-Luc certainly, but she found the old gardener charming and it made her feel somehow closer to Picard.
"Just let me know when I can start, and I'm yours." Crusher glanced back at HQ.
"You just want an excuse to get out of there." He gestured gruffly.
"Guilty as charged." She favored him with a smile, and they moved off down the walk.
"Comin' on a year you been here, young lady." He glanced over at her. "How much longer you planning on sticking around?"
"The medical fleet is coming on quite well. Ahead of schedule, actually. If we continue with our current progress, I'll be back in space in less than six months." Her voice was wistful.
"But that's not why you're down here every morning, is it?" His eyes met hers and his expression was crafty.
"And you say you're just an expert with flora." Crusher took him by the shoulders. "No, I miss Jean-Luc."
"Well, can't say I understand that, but lookin' out at the bay here isn't going to solve it." They stopped and both gazed back out at the churning water.
Crusher gave a heavy sigh and her eyes were distant. "No." She and Jean-Luc had exchanged daily communiqués, but the routine was growing thin. It simply was not possible to maintain intimacy over subspace. While she still looked forward to their every contact, their conversations grew ever shorter. She was beginning to feel that without a change in circumstance their lives would grow apart permanently.
He looked back over at the frail woman and laid a hand on her arm. "I've got to be getting back to work."
She gave him a wan smile. "See you tomorrow."
He nodded and walked off.
After a moment Crusher took a deep breath and headed off toward the imposing Starfleet medical compound.
********* Beverly gave her assistant a look of exasperation as she appeared at the door. "Janie I really can't see anyone right now. It will have to wait."
"But Captain...." Lieutenant Janie Snyder's voice was plaintive.
"Janie I'm sorry, I just don't have time. Tell them to come back this afternoon." Crusher waved her out of the office without looking up. She was deep into the specs of one of the medical quickships, a sort of modern day clipper. They were meant for emergency response and triage and they were having difficulty getting all the space and equipment they wanted jammed into the small ship.
The man at the door laid a hand on Snyder's shoulder and nodded for her to leave. She looked at him skeptically, but departed anyway, closing the door behind her. It would be one more hurdle for Crusher before she got to her and ripped her head off. Maybe she could get a head start down the hall.
"Not even time for old friends, Captain?" Picard's deep baritone rumbled through the office, reaching Beverly's ecstatic ears. She looked up immediately and almost fell out of her chair. Recovering quickly she leapt up and ran toward him. She almost knocked him over with the force of her embrace.
She barely got out a quick "Jean-Luc" before beginning to ply him with kisses.
His smile was dazzling. "I missed you too, my love."
She disengaged himself and slapped him hard on the chest. He let out a small 'oof.' "When did you get here, and why didn't I know? And what do you mean 'old friends?'
Picard laughed heartily, forgetting what a whirlwind of energy Beverly was. He felt his spirits rise exponentially just looking at her. It hit him suddenly how much he'd missed her. "We arrived just a couple hours ago. We only got the order to return a few days ago, and I planned this as a surprise." He looked her over and sensed that he was out of danger. She was simply too happy to see him.
Crusher thought about her morning and the fact that the Enterprise had likely been in orbit as she'd been thinking about Jean-Luc. She looked at him hungrily, taking in every aspect of his features. She had missed his nobility, and his chiseled frame. She also realized how peaceful she'd felt as soon as she'd thrown her arms around him. She felt immediately centered.
"Well then." Meeting his eyes she could refrain no longer. She pulled herself to him and kissed him deeply and passionately. On the verge of losing control, Picard pushed her back gently. "Beverly, please tell me you are free for lunch." His eyes were dark as he stared into her blazing sapphire gaze.
"I really am up to here with work." She placed her hand at her forehead. "But if I sneak off for a quick lunch and stay late tonite, I should be OK. Even if I weren't free I'd make the time." She traced lazy circles over his chest. She was practically driven to distraction by being so close to him now. Her expression turned to one of sad curiosity. "When are you leaving?"
Picard recognized her pout. "We depart in three days." His eyes were contrite.
Beverly brought herself up to full height and squared her posture. "Well then, we don't have any time to lose. I'll see you for lunch. Your quarters?" Her brow was arched, and Picard's legs became weak.
"Yes - 1300 hours?" It was all he could get out as he melted under her intense gaze.
She pulled him in again for another breathtaking kiss. "I won't be late."
They stood together for another minute until Picard finally stepped back. "Until then, Doctor."
She smiled as she watched him walk out of the office, not turning back to her desk until the door was closed behind him. She sat down and stared out the window for a moment. She tapped her communicator. "Janie?"
"Yes, Doctor?" Snyder's usually calm demeanor had returned.
"That was Captain Picard. He'll be here for the next couple of days and I will always be available to see him." Crusher's tone was perfectly businesslike.
"Aye sir." Janie made a mental note and signed off. She could understand that order. Picard looked to be getting on in age, but he was a living legend, and quite frankly still very hot.
*********
Jean-Luc and Beverly spent any and every free moment together for the next three days, and most of that time in his cabin or at her wharf-front apartment. When they did go out they made a point of staying away from fleet haunts, as they attracted far too much attention and were barely able to get a word in to each other through the waves of acquaintances. Beverly also took some time to catch up with Will, Deanna, Data and Geordi. They'd all gathered the second evening for dinner, which had been the best time she'd had for as long as she could remember. She and Deanna had taken a moment away to catch up. Troi was quite inquisitive and could sense Beverly's dissatisfaction. Crusher admitted that the work at HQ was challenging, rewarding, and amazing. But she was quite lonely despite the friends she'd made that year.
Everyone had departed late in the night and she and Jean-Luc had retired to the sofa. Crusher was in a reflective mood and sipped her remaining wine quietly. Noticing how beautiful Beverly was in the soft light of her living room, Jean-Luc took a moment just to gaze at her and she could feel waves of love emanating from him. He knew she would not be inclined to speak, so he gently prodded. "Penny?"
Crusher looked up at him, a smile on her lips and in her eyes. "I'm sure you can guess." They'd spent much time talking of her work and assignment, and their time apart. "I just keep pretending that we're going to be together any day now." She traced the rim of her glass with a delicate finger. "When I take it one day at a time I can manage. But when I think of the future, it all becomes so overwhelming." Her look was intense and Picard found it hard to hold her eyes. "Jean-Luc, I know that we're both older. But I hadn't given up on the idea that we might have a family." She smiled sheepishly. "I suppose it's foolish, and I know that we've never even talked about it. But I feel time slipping away."
Picard's heart swelled with love and sadness at the same time. He wanted nothing more than a family with Beverly, and he understood her perfectly. He offered a reassuring hand and she took it, holding it firmly. "Beverly, it's not foolish. I've spent decades in space, commanding ships in battle, mediating warring factions, and solving countless puzzles. But I honestly don't know a way out of this for us."
Beverly shook herself. "Well, we're not solving it tonite. But we can't do this indefinitely. One of us is going to have to make a change." She was completely serious now. "One year, Jean-Luc. I will only do this for one more year."
He nodded his acceptance. Beverly took the chain from around her neck and slipped his ring back on her finger, a signal to him that the time for conversation was over. "Now. We have very little time left, and I intend to spend it wisely." Silently she rose from the sofa and extended her hand. Picard took it, and they made their way quickly upstairs.
*********
Six months later, Captain Beverly Crusher stood at the space dock at Utopia Planetia, entranced by her command, the flagship of the medical fleet. "USS Nightingale, NCC 1324." She murmured the registry quietly, her voice reverent. She could not wait to step onto the bridge. She'd walked through several times but never with the crew and never to head a mission. Her fingers traced the outline of the ship on the view port.
The launch ceremony was tomorrow and it was to be a full-scale event. Most of the admiralty and ambassadorship would be there, as diplomatic efforts were to be closely tied with the medical fleet. Each ship would carry an ambassador in addition to the medical and scientific compliment. Assignments to all the ships were still in shakedown, though most of the Nightingale's crew was set. She was incredibly excited to have Doctor Selar back under her command as CMO, and Alyssa Powell as second officer. It was a huge leap forward in Powell's career, but Beverly had every confidence in her. To Crusher, trust and skill counted as much as experience.
Lost in thought, Beverly started as she realized how long she'd been staring at the ship. It was so sleek and powerful, and gigantic. The crew numbered only around 700 but the ship was massive and made for housing and transporting large numbers of casualties. When full it would hold almost 3,000. For that reason it was also well armed, a fact Crusher often tried to forget. She could not believe the amount of responsibility she was taking on.
She nearly jumped out of her skin as a strong pair of hands grasped her from behind. "You will be magnificent."
She whipped around and hit Picard on the chest. "You are the most infuriating man I have ever met, Jean-Luc Picard." Her tantrum was short lived, however, and she kissed him passionately. The Enterprise had arrived a day before to attend the launch and Beverly was glad to have Picard there for moral support. There were several ceremonial events scheduled and she was featured prominently in all of them.
He smiled gallantly. "And you love me for it."
She favored him with an inquisitive glance. "How did you know what I was thinking?"
He held her tightly from behind as they both gazed at the new vessel. "I recognized the look on your face. It was the same I wore the first time I saw the Enterprise." He too was taken in by the size and design of the ship. "I was petrified and exhilarated at the same time."
She took a deep breath in and clutched his hands to her stomach. "I've been so caught up in the designs, and the crew rosters, and the launch plans that I never stopped to actually think about commanding my own vessel. It's incredibly intimidating."
Picard was smiling as he turned her around to face him. "Beverly, I have every confidence in you, and so does Starfleet." He kissed her forehead lovingly.
"Thank you Jean-Luc. Your support means a lot to me." Crusher glanced over her shoulder. "You ready for the sneak preview?" She smiled mischievously. The ship was still in dock, and she'd planned weeks ago to take Jean-Luc around before the official tours began.
"I cannot wait." He offered her his arm, and she led him toward the embarking station. Beverly was still anxious but she found that Picard's presence eliminated her self-doubt. She snuck a glance over at him and grinned.
*********
"The medical fleet represents the best of Starfleet and the Federation. It will allow us to provide aid to the needy and comfort to the afflicted. We will not discriminate in our treatment, nor will we be swayed from our oath to heal by transient politics." Crusher paused in her speech and gazed out at the massive audience covering the grounds of Starfleet headquarters.
"This fleet is a symbol to all the peoples in this sector that the Federation believes we can live in harmony. It is a symbol of the enduring promise of mercy and compassion, and their ability to unite us all in peace. This is a turning point for Starfleet, our allies, and our future allies. It is a promise to all our citizens that we are committed to protecting you from war and all its ravages. It is a promise that we will respect life in all its forms." She paused again and met the eye of the Ambassador from New Genesis. Siohban had been persuaded to work with the Federation, and the results had been positive for the planet's citizens. The relationship between the powers was still tenuous, but growing stronger by the day. He saw her gesture and inclined his head. Smiling, Crusher continued.
"I charge all of you here today to join me in upholding the spirit of the creation of this fleet, and fulfilling its promise. On behalf of all our crew, thank you for supporting us now, and for your continued support as we journey forth from this point to create new bonds of peace throughout the galaxy." The applause was thunderous as she concluded, and she stood for a moment at the podium, smiling. She truly believed in her own words and was thrilled to see the support for the fleet played out before her.
Behind her stood the captains from the six other ships in the fleet, the heads of Starfleet, Starfleet Academy, Starfleet Medical and the Federation. In front of her she could see the senior staff of the Enterprise, all their faces shining up at her with pride. Jean-Luc, most of all, was beaming. As the head of the Federation came forward to meet her and conclude the ceremony, her left hand darted impulsively to her collar. As her arm moved, a beam of light streaked by and sliced through her sleeve.
The grounds exploded in chaos around her and she reflexively threw herself over the President of the Federation. Security personnel surrounded them momentarily. She heard various communications flying between them, and finally heard confirmation that the attempted assassin had been apprehended. She looked around and finally noticed the President moving beneath her. She smiled in embarrassment and stood, offering him a hand. He met her smile as he rose. There were yellow uniforms swarming around them, and out of the corner of her eye she saw Picard's burgundy uniform fighting through the fray. He finally made his way through and they embraced tightly.
Beverly turned again to see the mass of people churning on the grounds. She cleared her throat and made her way to the podium. "Please, everyone. Take your seats." The din abated slightly and she repeated herself, gesturing for everyone to settle down. Within minutes a semblance of calm had been restored. She was still flanked by four security personnel, and the brass all stood behind her, surrounded by security as well. She stepped away from the podium and briefly engaged her nearest guard to make sure the threat had been neutralized. He nodded and she stepped back up to address the uneasy crowd.
"Well. It seems not everyone shares my sentiments." She smiled and a chuckle skittered through the audience. Gathering herself and standing to full height, she continued. "In all seriousness, my friends, we have just witnessed why this fleet is so critical. Threats to our security mount daily, and they cannot simply be answered by sounding the drums of war. They cannot be answered in anger, and they cannot be remedied through force." Her voice rose in timbre as she spoke and her body language became animated as her Howard temperament shone through.
"Instead, no matter how difficult, we must let our compassion guide us through these times. We must let it be an example to all who would oppose our agenda of peace, and all those who would turn to us in their time of need - that their suffering will be met with understanding." She paused as her voice was momentarily drowned in applause. "Thank you all for standing with me in this moment. I will undoubtedly be turning to each of you in the future for support in this endeavor, and I hope that I will be met with open arms. Thank you."
Again she stood at the podium as the audience rose to their feet. She turned and gestured for all on the dais to come forward, which they did. The applause grew louder, and she stepped back to stand in line with her fellow officers.
Picard came to stand beside her. He leaned over to whisper in her ear. "Well done, Captain."
She met his eyes and smiled. "Thanks. But can we get out of here now? Because this hurts like hell." She looked down to her arm. The fabric of her dress uniform was singed off, and angry red muscle was visible through a wide gash in the fabric.
Picard's eyes flashed with concern, and she gave him a reassuring smile. "Don't worry Jean-Luc. It'll be fine." She could see he was not convinced. "Trust me. I'm a doctor." Her delivery was absolutely deadpan.
He chuckled as the applause died down and the crowd began dissipating. The heads of state on the stage came together and began conversing animatedly, circled by a sea of yellow and black. Several people attempted to speak with Beverly, but Picard diplomatically brushed them off as he steered her toward the stairs. Despite her assurances, he was quite concerned about her injury and intent on getting her back to the medical building.
Finally winding their way through the chaos, Picard and Crusher entered the deserted facility. Beverly indicated the way to the main medical bay, but Picard noticed she was beginning to flag. The arm of her uniform was now damp with blood, and she'd begun to pale. Picard slipped his arm under her shoulders to help her make it the rest of the way. When they entered the lone attending physicians turned in shock. They'd watched the ceremony over closed channels in the center and had not expected to see either of the people in front of them. They rushed forward simultaneously to treat the ailing doctor.
Picard watched helplessly as Crusher was whisked away. He believed Crusher that the wound was not serious, but it did not assuage the residual panic he'd felt at witnessing the attempt on her life. As Captain he knew he'd frequently been the target of assassination plots but he had never witnessed an attempt on anyone he held so close to his heart. It had left him shaken, but even more resolute in the decision he'd made months previous. He could not wait to share it with Beverly.
Seeing that he was of little use to her now, he exited into the waiting room and tapped his comm. "Picard to Riker."
"Riker here sir. Where are you?" Will's voice was full of concern and there was clearly a hub of activity around him.
"I'm at medical with Doctor Crusher. She was wounded slightly."
"Is she all right, Captain?" Riker's concern doubled.
Picard smiled as he watched her through the glass in the waiting room. She was impatiently stirring around on the biobed, a sure sign that she was feeling quite well. "She'll be fine Number One."
"Good to hear sir. What can I do for you?"
"I was hoping for an update on the events this afternoon. Have they interrogated the suspect yet?" Picard's tone was now authoritative.
"Yes sir. As far as they can tell he's part of a radical splinter cell of the Maquis. That's all they've got so far but I'll keep you updated." Riker was clearly distracted by his surroundings.
"Very good Will. Picard out." The Captain looked over to see Beverly know standing and practically swatting away medics. He grinned and went in to assist her.
"Doctor. What's the prognosis?" He appeared in the doorway, hands clasped behind him, and Beverly smiled up.
"I'm perfectly fine, Captain, but my friends here are being quite zealous in their examination." Crusher's tone was stern, but not unkind.
"I can appreciate your situation." A wicked grin spread on to his face. "I've been on the receiving end of overzealous examinations myself once or twice."
A blush rose in her cheeks and her eyes flashed. Picard would be paying for that later. "That was not funny, Captain."
"I suppose that's a matter of perspective, Doctor." He raised his brow and met her agitated gaze. She saw his eyes twinkling and her ire subsided. They had been flirting like this for twenty years, and it never failed to quicken her pulse. She accepted his truce and smiled back.
A young medic finished up with the dermaplaster on her arm and offered her the tricorder he'd used to scan the area. She nodded approvingly and snapped it shut. "Good as new." She turned to Jean-Luc. "Now let's get out of here. I'm starving."
*********
They were able to have much of the afternoon to themselves, but Crusher was required to attend an official dinner that evening, again with most of the Starfleet and Federation brass. Security there was unbelievably tight but Crusher had to admit she did not feel much more threatened than she had that afternoon. As long as there were determined terrorists they would strike eventually. She and Picard had enjoyed a heated discussion over the issue, with both eventually agreeing that diplomacy was the ultimate answer to the issue.
Dinner itself had been unremarkable but Jean-Luc had seemed a bit on edge the entire evening. Crusher had given him several curious glances, but he'd met each with a charming smile. Finally the formal dining had concluded and they were now enduring round after round of speeches. During one of the longer delivered by a pompous ambassador from Vulcan, Picard had drawn Crusher aside. She immediately pulled him into an amorous embrace, but he'd responded by pushing her off gently. She whimpered in frustration. "What's going on with you this evening?"
"Beverly, there's going to be an announcement in a few minutes, and I wanted to give you some warning." His eyes were dark, and she could read uncertainty in his body language. She urged him to continue. "When I was here last, you said you would only wait another year for a change in our circumstance. That time is nearly up, and Beverly I would never ask you to surrender your commission."
She put a finger to his lips, and concern began to build at the back of her mind. What was he saying? It was true that she could not stand to be apart from him. But she could not imagine ever ending their relationship. "Jean- Luc, let's talk about this later."
He took her hand gently. "Beverly, this cannot wait. You were right. This is no way to carry on a relationship." He sighed, but there was a spark behind his eyes. Now he took both of her hands in his. "Beverly, I'm leaving the Enterprise."
*********
A House Divided
Chapter Six
*********
A lone figure stood in front of the massive San Francisco bay, a silhouette against the crisp blue sky. The wind whipped at her hair, which flew out behind her in a fiery streak. She was motionless, enraptured by the movement of the white-crested waves and puffy clouds. On her left was the bright red Golden Gate bridge and behind her the grounds of Starfleet Academy.
Beverly Crusher wandered down here early each morning on her way to work at HQ. She loved the Academy grounds, though she hated the way cadets ogled her as she walked by. She'd happily given several guest lectures while she was back on Earth, and no one made a splash at the Academy like officers returned from deep space. It were as if you'd come back with a different aura, one the cadets longed to acquire for themselves. So she always came early before classes began. Gazing at the bay calmed her soul, which was in a massive knot.
She turned as she heard someone call her name. 'Please don't let it be any kind of administrator.' Pasting a helplessly phony smile on her face she turned. It quickly became genuine as she recognized the owner of the voice. "Boothby!" She embraced him warmly.
"I'm going to put you to work if you keep showing up here every morning." His grizzled countenance was contorted into a smile and his eyes gleamed. She'd started coming here early in the morning some months ago, and they'd begun striking up conversation. Last month they'd discovered their mutual friendship with Jean-Luc and from that point on had been fast friends. "I should have known that anyone who could put up with talking to me every morning would be someone who had already been putting up with that old grump for years." Boothby had then favored her with a crooked smile, and she'd become used to starting her morning with him. A poor substitute for Jean-Luc certainly, but she found the old gardener charming and it made her feel somehow closer to Picard.
"Just let me know when I can start, and I'm yours." Crusher glanced back at HQ.
"You just want an excuse to get out of there." He gestured gruffly.
"Guilty as charged." She favored him with a smile, and they moved off down the walk.
"Comin' on a year you been here, young lady." He glanced over at her. "How much longer you planning on sticking around?"
"The medical fleet is coming on quite well. Ahead of schedule, actually. If we continue with our current progress, I'll be back in space in less than six months." Her voice was wistful.
"But that's not why you're down here every morning, is it?" His eyes met hers and his expression was crafty.
"And you say you're just an expert with flora." Crusher took him by the shoulders. "No, I miss Jean-Luc."
"Well, can't say I understand that, but lookin' out at the bay here isn't going to solve it." They stopped and both gazed back out at the churning water.
Crusher gave a heavy sigh and her eyes were distant. "No." She and Jean-Luc had exchanged daily communiqués, but the routine was growing thin. It simply was not possible to maintain intimacy over subspace. While she still looked forward to their every contact, their conversations grew ever shorter. She was beginning to feel that without a change in circumstance their lives would grow apart permanently.
He looked back over at the frail woman and laid a hand on her arm. "I've got to be getting back to work."
She gave him a wan smile. "See you tomorrow."
He nodded and walked off.
After a moment Crusher took a deep breath and headed off toward the imposing Starfleet medical compound.
********* Beverly gave her assistant a look of exasperation as she appeared at the door. "Janie I really can't see anyone right now. It will have to wait."
"But Captain...." Lieutenant Janie Snyder's voice was plaintive.
"Janie I'm sorry, I just don't have time. Tell them to come back this afternoon." Crusher waved her out of the office without looking up. She was deep into the specs of one of the medical quickships, a sort of modern day clipper. They were meant for emergency response and triage and they were having difficulty getting all the space and equipment they wanted jammed into the small ship.
The man at the door laid a hand on Snyder's shoulder and nodded for her to leave. She looked at him skeptically, but departed anyway, closing the door behind her. It would be one more hurdle for Crusher before she got to her and ripped her head off. Maybe she could get a head start down the hall.
"Not even time for old friends, Captain?" Picard's deep baritone rumbled through the office, reaching Beverly's ecstatic ears. She looked up immediately and almost fell out of her chair. Recovering quickly she leapt up and ran toward him. She almost knocked him over with the force of her embrace.
She barely got out a quick "Jean-Luc" before beginning to ply him with kisses.
His smile was dazzling. "I missed you too, my love."
She disengaged himself and slapped him hard on the chest. He let out a small 'oof.' "When did you get here, and why didn't I know? And what do you mean 'old friends?'
Picard laughed heartily, forgetting what a whirlwind of energy Beverly was. He felt his spirits rise exponentially just looking at her. It hit him suddenly how much he'd missed her. "We arrived just a couple hours ago. We only got the order to return a few days ago, and I planned this as a surprise." He looked her over and sensed that he was out of danger. She was simply too happy to see him.
Crusher thought about her morning and the fact that the Enterprise had likely been in orbit as she'd been thinking about Jean-Luc. She looked at him hungrily, taking in every aspect of his features. She had missed his nobility, and his chiseled frame. She also realized how peaceful she'd felt as soon as she'd thrown her arms around him. She felt immediately centered.
"Well then." Meeting his eyes she could refrain no longer. She pulled herself to him and kissed him deeply and passionately. On the verge of losing control, Picard pushed her back gently. "Beverly, please tell me you are free for lunch." His eyes were dark as he stared into her blazing sapphire gaze.
"I really am up to here with work." She placed her hand at her forehead. "But if I sneak off for a quick lunch and stay late tonite, I should be OK. Even if I weren't free I'd make the time." She traced lazy circles over his chest. She was practically driven to distraction by being so close to him now. Her expression turned to one of sad curiosity. "When are you leaving?"
Picard recognized her pout. "We depart in three days." His eyes were contrite.
Beverly brought herself up to full height and squared her posture. "Well then, we don't have any time to lose. I'll see you for lunch. Your quarters?" Her brow was arched, and Picard's legs became weak.
"Yes - 1300 hours?" It was all he could get out as he melted under her intense gaze.
She pulled him in again for another breathtaking kiss. "I won't be late."
They stood together for another minute until Picard finally stepped back. "Until then, Doctor."
She smiled as she watched him walk out of the office, not turning back to her desk until the door was closed behind him. She sat down and stared out the window for a moment. She tapped her communicator. "Janie?"
"Yes, Doctor?" Snyder's usually calm demeanor had returned.
"That was Captain Picard. He'll be here for the next couple of days and I will always be available to see him." Crusher's tone was perfectly businesslike.
"Aye sir." Janie made a mental note and signed off. She could understand that order. Picard looked to be getting on in age, but he was a living legend, and quite frankly still very hot.
*********
Jean-Luc and Beverly spent any and every free moment together for the next three days, and most of that time in his cabin or at her wharf-front apartment. When they did go out they made a point of staying away from fleet haunts, as they attracted far too much attention and were barely able to get a word in to each other through the waves of acquaintances. Beverly also took some time to catch up with Will, Deanna, Data and Geordi. They'd all gathered the second evening for dinner, which had been the best time she'd had for as long as she could remember. She and Deanna had taken a moment away to catch up. Troi was quite inquisitive and could sense Beverly's dissatisfaction. Crusher admitted that the work at HQ was challenging, rewarding, and amazing. But she was quite lonely despite the friends she'd made that year.
Everyone had departed late in the night and she and Jean-Luc had retired to the sofa. Crusher was in a reflective mood and sipped her remaining wine quietly. Noticing how beautiful Beverly was in the soft light of her living room, Jean-Luc took a moment just to gaze at her and she could feel waves of love emanating from him. He knew she would not be inclined to speak, so he gently prodded. "Penny?"
Crusher looked up at him, a smile on her lips and in her eyes. "I'm sure you can guess." They'd spent much time talking of her work and assignment, and their time apart. "I just keep pretending that we're going to be together any day now." She traced the rim of her glass with a delicate finger. "When I take it one day at a time I can manage. But when I think of the future, it all becomes so overwhelming." Her look was intense and Picard found it hard to hold her eyes. "Jean-Luc, I know that we're both older. But I hadn't given up on the idea that we might have a family." She smiled sheepishly. "I suppose it's foolish, and I know that we've never even talked about it. But I feel time slipping away."
Picard's heart swelled with love and sadness at the same time. He wanted nothing more than a family with Beverly, and he understood her perfectly. He offered a reassuring hand and she took it, holding it firmly. "Beverly, it's not foolish. I've spent decades in space, commanding ships in battle, mediating warring factions, and solving countless puzzles. But I honestly don't know a way out of this for us."
Beverly shook herself. "Well, we're not solving it tonite. But we can't do this indefinitely. One of us is going to have to make a change." She was completely serious now. "One year, Jean-Luc. I will only do this for one more year."
He nodded his acceptance. Beverly took the chain from around her neck and slipped his ring back on her finger, a signal to him that the time for conversation was over. "Now. We have very little time left, and I intend to spend it wisely." Silently she rose from the sofa and extended her hand. Picard took it, and they made their way quickly upstairs.
*********
Six months later, Captain Beverly Crusher stood at the space dock at Utopia Planetia, entranced by her command, the flagship of the medical fleet. "USS Nightingale, NCC 1324." She murmured the registry quietly, her voice reverent. She could not wait to step onto the bridge. She'd walked through several times but never with the crew and never to head a mission. Her fingers traced the outline of the ship on the view port.
The launch ceremony was tomorrow and it was to be a full-scale event. Most of the admiralty and ambassadorship would be there, as diplomatic efforts were to be closely tied with the medical fleet. Each ship would carry an ambassador in addition to the medical and scientific compliment. Assignments to all the ships were still in shakedown, though most of the Nightingale's crew was set. She was incredibly excited to have Doctor Selar back under her command as CMO, and Alyssa Powell as second officer. It was a huge leap forward in Powell's career, but Beverly had every confidence in her. To Crusher, trust and skill counted as much as experience.
Lost in thought, Beverly started as she realized how long she'd been staring at the ship. It was so sleek and powerful, and gigantic. The crew numbered only around 700 but the ship was massive and made for housing and transporting large numbers of casualties. When full it would hold almost 3,000. For that reason it was also well armed, a fact Crusher often tried to forget. She could not believe the amount of responsibility she was taking on.
She nearly jumped out of her skin as a strong pair of hands grasped her from behind. "You will be magnificent."
She whipped around and hit Picard on the chest. "You are the most infuriating man I have ever met, Jean-Luc Picard." Her tantrum was short lived, however, and she kissed him passionately. The Enterprise had arrived a day before to attend the launch and Beverly was glad to have Picard there for moral support. There were several ceremonial events scheduled and she was featured prominently in all of them.
He smiled gallantly. "And you love me for it."
She favored him with an inquisitive glance. "How did you know what I was thinking?"
He held her tightly from behind as they both gazed at the new vessel. "I recognized the look on your face. It was the same I wore the first time I saw the Enterprise." He too was taken in by the size and design of the ship. "I was petrified and exhilarated at the same time."
She took a deep breath in and clutched his hands to her stomach. "I've been so caught up in the designs, and the crew rosters, and the launch plans that I never stopped to actually think about commanding my own vessel. It's incredibly intimidating."
Picard was smiling as he turned her around to face him. "Beverly, I have every confidence in you, and so does Starfleet." He kissed her forehead lovingly.
"Thank you Jean-Luc. Your support means a lot to me." Crusher glanced over her shoulder. "You ready for the sneak preview?" She smiled mischievously. The ship was still in dock, and she'd planned weeks ago to take Jean-Luc around before the official tours began.
"I cannot wait." He offered her his arm, and she led him toward the embarking station. Beverly was still anxious but she found that Picard's presence eliminated her self-doubt. She snuck a glance over at him and grinned.
*********
"The medical fleet represents the best of Starfleet and the Federation. It will allow us to provide aid to the needy and comfort to the afflicted. We will not discriminate in our treatment, nor will we be swayed from our oath to heal by transient politics." Crusher paused in her speech and gazed out at the massive audience covering the grounds of Starfleet headquarters.
"This fleet is a symbol to all the peoples in this sector that the Federation believes we can live in harmony. It is a symbol of the enduring promise of mercy and compassion, and their ability to unite us all in peace. This is a turning point for Starfleet, our allies, and our future allies. It is a promise to all our citizens that we are committed to protecting you from war and all its ravages. It is a promise that we will respect life in all its forms." She paused again and met the eye of the Ambassador from New Genesis. Siohban had been persuaded to work with the Federation, and the results had been positive for the planet's citizens. The relationship between the powers was still tenuous, but growing stronger by the day. He saw her gesture and inclined his head. Smiling, Crusher continued.
"I charge all of you here today to join me in upholding the spirit of the creation of this fleet, and fulfilling its promise. On behalf of all our crew, thank you for supporting us now, and for your continued support as we journey forth from this point to create new bonds of peace throughout the galaxy." The applause was thunderous as she concluded, and she stood for a moment at the podium, smiling. She truly believed in her own words and was thrilled to see the support for the fleet played out before her.
Behind her stood the captains from the six other ships in the fleet, the heads of Starfleet, Starfleet Academy, Starfleet Medical and the Federation. In front of her she could see the senior staff of the Enterprise, all their faces shining up at her with pride. Jean-Luc, most of all, was beaming. As the head of the Federation came forward to meet her and conclude the ceremony, her left hand darted impulsively to her collar. As her arm moved, a beam of light streaked by and sliced through her sleeve.
The grounds exploded in chaos around her and she reflexively threw herself over the President of the Federation. Security personnel surrounded them momentarily. She heard various communications flying between them, and finally heard confirmation that the attempted assassin had been apprehended. She looked around and finally noticed the President moving beneath her. She smiled in embarrassment and stood, offering him a hand. He met her smile as he rose. There were yellow uniforms swarming around them, and out of the corner of her eye she saw Picard's burgundy uniform fighting through the fray. He finally made his way through and they embraced tightly.
Beverly turned again to see the mass of people churning on the grounds. She cleared her throat and made her way to the podium. "Please, everyone. Take your seats." The din abated slightly and she repeated herself, gesturing for everyone to settle down. Within minutes a semblance of calm had been restored. She was still flanked by four security personnel, and the brass all stood behind her, surrounded by security as well. She stepped away from the podium and briefly engaged her nearest guard to make sure the threat had been neutralized. He nodded and she stepped back up to address the uneasy crowd.
"Well. It seems not everyone shares my sentiments." She smiled and a chuckle skittered through the audience. Gathering herself and standing to full height, she continued. "In all seriousness, my friends, we have just witnessed why this fleet is so critical. Threats to our security mount daily, and they cannot simply be answered by sounding the drums of war. They cannot be answered in anger, and they cannot be remedied through force." Her voice rose in timbre as she spoke and her body language became animated as her Howard temperament shone through.
"Instead, no matter how difficult, we must let our compassion guide us through these times. We must let it be an example to all who would oppose our agenda of peace, and all those who would turn to us in their time of need - that their suffering will be met with understanding." She paused as her voice was momentarily drowned in applause. "Thank you all for standing with me in this moment. I will undoubtedly be turning to each of you in the future for support in this endeavor, and I hope that I will be met with open arms. Thank you."
Again she stood at the podium as the audience rose to their feet. She turned and gestured for all on the dais to come forward, which they did. The applause grew louder, and she stepped back to stand in line with her fellow officers.
Picard came to stand beside her. He leaned over to whisper in her ear. "Well done, Captain."
She met his eyes and smiled. "Thanks. But can we get out of here now? Because this hurts like hell." She looked down to her arm. The fabric of her dress uniform was singed off, and angry red muscle was visible through a wide gash in the fabric.
Picard's eyes flashed with concern, and she gave him a reassuring smile. "Don't worry Jean-Luc. It'll be fine." She could see he was not convinced. "Trust me. I'm a doctor." Her delivery was absolutely deadpan.
He chuckled as the applause died down and the crowd began dissipating. The heads of state on the stage came together and began conversing animatedly, circled by a sea of yellow and black. Several people attempted to speak with Beverly, but Picard diplomatically brushed them off as he steered her toward the stairs. Despite her assurances, he was quite concerned about her injury and intent on getting her back to the medical building.
Finally winding their way through the chaos, Picard and Crusher entered the deserted facility. Beverly indicated the way to the main medical bay, but Picard noticed she was beginning to flag. The arm of her uniform was now damp with blood, and she'd begun to pale. Picard slipped his arm under her shoulders to help her make it the rest of the way. When they entered the lone attending physicians turned in shock. They'd watched the ceremony over closed channels in the center and had not expected to see either of the people in front of them. They rushed forward simultaneously to treat the ailing doctor.
Picard watched helplessly as Crusher was whisked away. He believed Crusher that the wound was not serious, but it did not assuage the residual panic he'd felt at witnessing the attempt on her life. As Captain he knew he'd frequently been the target of assassination plots but he had never witnessed an attempt on anyone he held so close to his heart. It had left him shaken, but even more resolute in the decision he'd made months previous. He could not wait to share it with Beverly.
Seeing that he was of little use to her now, he exited into the waiting room and tapped his comm. "Picard to Riker."
"Riker here sir. Where are you?" Will's voice was full of concern and there was clearly a hub of activity around him.
"I'm at medical with Doctor Crusher. She was wounded slightly."
"Is she all right, Captain?" Riker's concern doubled.
Picard smiled as he watched her through the glass in the waiting room. She was impatiently stirring around on the biobed, a sure sign that she was feeling quite well. "She'll be fine Number One."
"Good to hear sir. What can I do for you?"
"I was hoping for an update on the events this afternoon. Have they interrogated the suspect yet?" Picard's tone was now authoritative.
"Yes sir. As far as they can tell he's part of a radical splinter cell of the Maquis. That's all they've got so far but I'll keep you updated." Riker was clearly distracted by his surroundings.
"Very good Will. Picard out." The Captain looked over to see Beverly know standing and practically swatting away medics. He grinned and went in to assist her.
"Doctor. What's the prognosis?" He appeared in the doorway, hands clasped behind him, and Beverly smiled up.
"I'm perfectly fine, Captain, but my friends here are being quite zealous in their examination." Crusher's tone was stern, but not unkind.
"I can appreciate your situation." A wicked grin spread on to his face. "I've been on the receiving end of overzealous examinations myself once or twice."
A blush rose in her cheeks and her eyes flashed. Picard would be paying for that later. "That was not funny, Captain."
"I suppose that's a matter of perspective, Doctor." He raised his brow and met her agitated gaze. She saw his eyes twinkling and her ire subsided. They had been flirting like this for twenty years, and it never failed to quicken her pulse. She accepted his truce and smiled back.
A young medic finished up with the dermaplaster on her arm and offered her the tricorder he'd used to scan the area. She nodded approvingly and snapped it shut. "Good as new." She turned to Jean-Luc. "Now let's get out of here. I'm starving."
*********
They were able to have much of the afternoon to themselves, but Crusher was required to attend an official dinner that evening, again with most of the Starfleet and Federation brass. Security there was unbelievably tight but Crusher had to admit she did not feel much more threatened than she had that afternoon. As long as there were determined terrorists they would strike eventually. She and Picard had enjoyed a heated discussion over the issue, with both eventually agreeing that diplomacy was the ultimate answer to the issue.
Dinner itself had been unremarkable but Jean-Luc had seemed a bit on edge the entire evening. Crusher had given him several curious glances, but he'd met each with a charming smile. Finally the formal dining had concluded and they were now enduring round after round of speeches. During one of the longer delivered by a pompous ambassador from Vulcan, Picard had drawn Crusher aside. She immediately pulled him into an amorous embrace, but he'd responded by pushing her off gently. She whimpered in frustration. "What's going on with you this evening?"
"Beverly, there's going to be an announcement in a few minutes, and I wanted to give you some warning." His eyes were dark, and she could read uncertainty in his body language. She urged him to continue. "When I was here last, you said you would only wait another year for a change in our circumstance. That time is nearly up, and Beverly I would never ask you to surrender your commission."
She put a finger to his lips, and concern began to build at the back of her mind. What was he saying? It was true that she could not stand to be apart from him. But she could not imagine ever ending their relationship. "Jean- Luc, let's talk about this later."
He took her hand gently. "Beverly, this cannot wait. You were right. This is no way to carry on a relationship." He sighed, but there was a spark behind his eyes. Now he took both of her hands in his. "Beverly, I'm leaving the Enterprise."
*********