*Abandon* by Electric Spyro
A.n. This chapter was equally hard to write cuz Lana and Clark are meant to be together!!! But, I gotta do it or else the fic won't turn out as fluffy. ;o)
Thanx 2 Sweet Strawberries, The Die Hard (i know - i'm terrible at that kinda stuff), LL2, and Akemi Akibi 4 reviewin'!!
just ta let u kno, this one's kinda long.
*~*~*
Clark was unfortunately right. Every night that week he barely slept. He was glad he didn't have to get up and do anything. He didn't think he would've had the energy. But despite all the sleepless nights, Sunday finally arrived and Clark woke to a beautiful winter picture outside his bedroom window.
There seemed to be at least six inches of snow on the ground now. Everything was dazzling white. Icickles hung from the roof on the house and glittered in the morning sun. Clark quickly got dressed and went downstairs for breakfast.
*~*~*
" You're finally up," Jonathan exclaimed as he saw Clark enter the kitchen and head towards the frig.
" Well, I kinda had a rough sleep again," Clark began as he searched the frig for food.
" Really? Do you wanna talk about it?" Jonathan suggested openmindedly.
" Well - no offense, Dad - but I'd feel kinda weird talking to you about it."
" Girl problems?" Jonathan guessed quickly.
Clark stared at his father in awe.
" How'd you know?"
" I was the same way when I was your age, Son. What happened?" Jonathan pleaded.
" Lana and I - kinda - broke up," Clark explained ducking down and looking further into the frig to avoid making eye contact with his father.
" I'm sorry, Clark," Jonathan stated as Clark shut the frig and checked the cabinet for anything to eat. " It was your secret wasn't it?"
Clark grabbed a Pop Tart out of the box on the top shelf and stared at it dumbly for a moment.
" I don't see why I can't tell her."
" Clark, you've already put a huge weight on Pete. If you really care about her then you're doing the right -"
" That's what I've been telling myself over and over again!" Clark said heatedly whirling around and staring at his father angrily. " I keep trying to convince myself this is the best way, but I really don't believe it. She just wants to get closer to me and I don't blame her. I would want to do the same thing."
" Clark, I know how you feel -"
" That's just it, Dad - no one knows how I feel. No one," Clark interupted through clinched teeth. He strutted out of the kitchen not bothering to heat up his Pop Tart in the toaster. He put on his coat and boots and went outside.
*~*~*
Clark stayed in the loft for most of the afternoon. He didn't feel like talking to anyone. He just sat and stared out at the perfect, clean snow.
" Yo, Clark!"
Clark turned to see his best friend, Pete, walking up the steps two at a time. He was wearing a heavy coat and gloves.
" What're you doin' up here? I thought you'd be out with Lana somewhere," Pete said walking up next to Clark's telescope.
" Well, I don't really wanna talk about it right now. Why are you over here anyway?" Clark stated dully.
" Chloe, Byron, Sarah, and I were gonna have a snowball fight and we wanted to know if you or Lana wanted to join us."
" I don't know about Lana, but I don't think I'll be coming. Thanks anyway," Clark confirmed gloomily looking out the window again.
Pete turned to Clark.
" What's up? Somethin' happen with you and Lana?"
" Would you call a break up 'something'?" Clark asked looking up at Pete.
" Break up? Aw, man, I'm sorry," Pete stated sympathetically.
" Hey guys!" Chloe greeted energetically as she raced up the stairs.
'Just what I didn't want - more people coming to talk to me,' Clark thought.
" Are you coming, Clark?"
" He doesn't want to. He and Lana just broke up."
" Really? That's a surprise," Chloe said staring at Clark's hurt face. " Lana said she would be glad to come and join in the fight."
" Just shows you how diffrent we really are I guess," Clark uttered not looking at either one of his friends.
" Well, do you think your dad'll let us use your property as the battlefield?" Pete wondered hopefully.
" I don't see why not. We've used it every other year," Clark answered a little rudely.
Pete acted as though he didn't hear the depression in Clark's voice.
" Okay, well, hope you get to feeling better, Clark," Chloe wished.
" Me too," Clark slipped in before both of his friends husseled down the stairs. He saw them jog out of the barn to meet with Bryon, Sarah, and - Clark's stomach flopped when he noticed - Lana.
*~*~*
Clark continued to sit in his loft passing the time by by watching the others tackle each other in the snow. Ironically, Lana seemed to be having the most fun. She smiled even when some one hit her with a snowball. Why would she be so happy? Didn't she feel the pain that he felt?
~'Cuz we lost it all~
~Nothing lasts forever~
~I'm sorry~
~I can't be perfect~
~Now it's just too late and~
~We can't go back~
~I'm sorry~
~I can't be perfect~
~I try not to think~
~About the pain I feel inside~
~Did you know you used to be my hero?~
~All the days you spend with me~
~Now seem so far away~
~And it feels like you don't care anymore~
~And now I try hard to make it~
~I just want to make you proud~
~I'm never gonna be good enough for you~
~I can't stand another fight~
~And nothing's alright~
He gazed helplessly at Lana's shining hair as it swished when she ran. He heard her giggle as Pete chased her around with a huge pack of snow in his hand. She tried to hide behind the tractor, but Pete quickly uncovered her and dropped the snowball on her back and then laughing to hard he could hardly run away from her as she grabbed to chucks of snow and made her way towards him with revenge gleaming in her eyes.
Chloe and Sarah were smuthering Byron in snow. It looked like he tripped and fell and the two girls were taking this opportunity to wrap him in as much snow as possible. They quickly abandoned this idea, however, when Bryon appeared to be standing up and forming a snowball almost as big as a soccer ball. Chloe and Sarah ran and hid behind Pete and Lana who look clueless until they saw Byron. Pete dropped the snowball he'd originally made to use on Lana and dashed off towards the nearest tree. He was shortly followed by Chloe, Sarah, and Lana who were all screaming gleefully.
Clark gave a huge sad sigh. He knew something was wrong with him when a snowball fight with his friends didn't even sound appealing. He stole a short glance at Lana. For a brief moment, Lana stared back. Their eyes had met for the first time in a week. Clark quickly broke off eye contact. He used to see joy and happiness in her eyes. Now all their was was pain and hurt. He knew now that her laughing and shrieking was just a cover up. Deep down inside, she felt just a bad as Clark did.
~'Cuz we lost it all~
~Nothing lasts forever~
~I'm sorry~
~I can't be perfect~
~Now it's just too late and~
~We can't go back~
~I'm sorry~
~I can't be perfect~
~Nothing's gonna change the things that you said~
~Nothing's gonna make this right again~
~Please don't turn your back~
~I can't believe it's hard~
~Just to talk to you~
~But you don't understand~
~'Cuz we lost it all~
~Nothing lasts forever~
~I'm sorry~
~I can't be perfect~
~Now it's just too late and~
~We can't go back~
~I'm sorry~
~I can't be perfect~
*~*~*
" All right - see ya!" Pete shouted to his friends as they left.
After he was done waving to them, Clark notice him turn around and head towards the loft. The steps creaked as he hopped up them.
" You mean to tell me that you sat up here all day?" Pete questioned without even greeting Clark.
" Yup."
" With no food?"
" I never felt hungry."
" Or T.V.?"
" Didn't feel like T.V. either."
Pete walked over and sat down on the couch next to Clark.
" If you wanna move on, you gotta start doing it some time. Take Lana for example - she's feeling just as bad as you, but she's still havin' fun."
" Usually, when you want to get over a person, you try to have fun without that person around you," Clark stated casually.
" Then let's do something! We could watch Ms. America and make fun of all the contestants. Or go to Blockbuster and rent movies like I Know What You Did Last Summer and Rose Red and watch them with the lights off. That'll take your mind off love."
" Thanks, but no thanks, Pete. I'd rather just stay up here and think for a while," Clark confirmed as he leaned back in the couch and closed his eyes.
" Well, alright. It's not my business if you wanta stay hidden up here wallowing in your pity for the rest of Christmas vacation. I bet the Ms. America pagent will be really funny though, Clark. Remember last year, Ms. California - the girl with the chandellier on head -, tripped on her dress that looked like some one wrapped her up in bunch of toilet paper? Haha! We laughed for days! You sure you wanna miss watching something like that?" Pete asked as if he were waving a steak in front of a hungry tiger.
Clark smiled meekly.
" I'll pass," he confirmed.
" Well, I guess I'll tell you who wins tomorrow. Bye, Clark."
" Bye, Pete."
Clark heard his friend as he clammered down the wooden stairs and then crunched through the icy snow outside. He waited a few moments before the stood up and walked over to his C.D. player. He scanned all his C.D.s. They were all there except for the Lifehouse one. It reminded him to much of Lana so he put away in a drawer. He didn't think he would be listening to it for a while.
When finally found the perfect C.D., he put in it his player and then walked back to his place on the couch and closed his eyes again.
~There's a light in your eyes~
~That I use to see~
~And a song in the words~
~That you spoke to me~
~Was I wrong to believe~
~In your melody?~
~There's a light in your eyes~
~Did you leave that light burning for me?~
~Should I keep on waitin'~
~Or does love keep on fading away?~
~It's been a while since I've seen you so how have you been?~
~Did you get my letter I wrote you but I did not send?~
~I tried to call, your old number~
~But the voice of the girl on the phone~
~I recognized, but she told me~
~The number was wrong~
~There's a light in my eyes~
~But it's too bright to see~
~And a pain in my heart~
~Where you used to be~
~Guess I was wrong to assume~
~That you were waiting here for me~
~There's a light your eyes~
~Did you leave that light burning for me?~
*~*~*
A.n. Just in case you're wondering, the songfic in this was part of the song 'Perfect" by Simple Plan and part of 'Light In Your Eyes' by Blessid Union Of Souls. awesome songs! :o)
A.n. This chapter was equally hard to write cuz Lana and Clark are meant to be together!!! But, I gotta do it or else the fic won't turn out as fluffy. ;o)
Thanx 2 Sweet Strawberries, The Die Hard (i know - i'm terrible at that kinda stuff), LL2, and Akemi Akibi 4 reviewin'!!
just ta let u kno, this one's kinda long.
*~*~*
Clark was unfortunately right. Every night that week he barely slept. He was glad he didn't have to get up and do anything. He didn't think he would've had the energy. But despite all the sleepless nights, Sunday finally arrived and Clark woke to a beautiful winter picture outside his bedroom window.
There seemed to be at least six inches of snow on the ground now. Everything was dazzling white. Icickles hung from the roof on the house and glittered in the morning sun. Clark quickly got dressed and went downstairs for breakfast.
*~*~*
" You're finally up," Jonathan exclaimed as he saw Clark enter the kitchen and head towards the frig.
" Well, I kinda had a rough sleep again," Clark began as he searched the frig for food.
" Really? Do you wanna talk about it?" Jonathan suggested openmindedly.
" Well - no offense, Dad - but I'd feel kinda weird talking to you about it."
" Girl problems?" Jonathan guessed quickly.
Clark stared at his father in awe.
" How'd you know?"
" I was the same way when I was your age, Son. What happened?" Jonathan pleaded.
" Lana and I - kinda - broke up," Clark explained ducking down and looking further into the frig to avoid making eye contact with his father.
" I'm sorry, Clark," Jonathan stated as Clark shut the frig and checked the cabinet for anything to eat. " It was your secret wasn't it?"
Clark grabbed a Pop Tart out of the box on the top shelf and stared at it dumbly for a moment.
" I don't see why I can't tell her."
" Clark, you've already put a huge weight on Pete. If you really care about her then you're doing the right -"
" That's what I've been telling myself over and over again!" Clark said heatedly whirling around and staring at his father angrily. " I keep trying to convince myself this is the best way, but I really don't believe it. She just wants to get closer to me and I don't blame her. I would want to do the same thing."
" Clark, I know how you feel -"
" That's just it, Dad - no one knows how I feel. No one," Clark interupted through clinched teeth. He strutted out of the kitchen not bothering to heat up his Pop Tart in the toaster. He put on his coat and boots and went outside.
*~*~*
Clark stayed in the loft for most of the afternoon. He didn't feel like talking to anyone. He just sat and stared out at the perfect, clean snow.
" Yo, Clark!"
Clark turned to see his best friend, Pete, walking up the steps two at a time. He was wearing a heavy coat and gloves.
" What're you doin' up here? I thought you'd be out with Lana somewhere," Pete said walking up next to Clark's telescope.
" Well, I don't really wanna talk about it right now. Why are you over here anyway?" Clark stated dully.
" Chloe, Byron, Sarah, and I were gonna have a snowball fight and we wanted to know if you or Lana wanted to join us."
" I don't know about Lana, but I don't think I'll be coming. Thanks anyway," Clark confirmed gloomily looking out the window again.
Pete turned to Clark.
" What's up? Somethin' happen with you and Lana?"
" Would you call a break up 'something'?" Clark asked looking up at Pete.
" Break up? Aw, man, I'm sorry," Pete stated sympathetically.
" Hey guys!" Chloe greeted energetically as she raced up the stairs.
'Just what I didn't want - more people coming to talk to me,' Clark thought.
" Are you coming, Clark?"
" He doesn't want to. He and Lana just broke up."
" Really? That's a surprise," Chloe said staring at Clark's hurt face. " Lana said she would be glad to come and join in the fight."
" Just shows you how diffrent we really are I guess," Clark uttered not looking at either one of his friends.
" Well, do you think your dad'll let us use your property as the battlefield?" Pete wondered hopefully.
" I don't see why not. We've used it every other year," Clark answered a little rudely.
Pete acted as though he didn't hear the depression in Clark's voice.
" Okay, well, hope you get to feeling better, Clark," Chloe wished.
" Me too," Clark slipped in before both of his friends husseled down the stairs. He saw them jog out of the barn to meet with Bryon, Sarah, and - Clark's stomach flopped when he noticed - Lana.
*~*~*
Clark continued to sit in his loft passing the time by by watching the others tackle each other in the snow. Ironically, Lana seemed to be having the most fun. She smiled even when some one hit her with a snowball. Why would she be so happy? Didn't she feel the pain that he felt?
~'Cuz we lost it all~
~Nothing lasts forever~
~I'm sorry~
~I can't be perfect~
~Now it's just too late and~
~We can't go back~
~I'm sorry~
~I can't be perfect~
~I try not to think~
~About the pain I feel inside~
~Did you know you used to be my hero?~
~All the days you spend with me~
~Now seem so far away~
~And it feels like you don't care anymore~
~And now I try hard to make it~
~I just want to make you proud~
~I'm never gonna be good enough for you~
~I can't stand another fight~
~And nothing's alright~
He gazed helplessly at Lana's shining hair as it swished when she ran. He heard her giggle as Pete chased her around with a huge pack of snow in his hand. She tried to hide behind the tractor, but Pete quickly uncovered her and dropped the snowball on her back and then laughing to hard he could hardly run away from her as she grabbed to chucks of snow and made her way towards him with revenge gleaming in her eyes.
Chloe and Sarah were smuthering Byron in snow. It looked like he tripped and fell and the two girls were taking this opportunity to wrap him in as much snow as possible. They quickly abandoned this idea, however, when Bryon appeared to be standing up and forming a snowball almost as big as a soccer ball. Chloe and Sarah ran and hid behind Pete and Lana who look clueless until they saw Byron. Pete dropped the snowball he'd originally made to use on Lana and dashed off towards the nearest tree. He was shortly followed by Chloe, Sarah, and Lana who were all screaming gleefully.
Clark gave a huge sad sigh. He knew something was wrong with him when a snowball fight with his friends didn't even sound appealing. He stole a short glance at Lana. For a brief moment, Lana stared back. Their eyes had met for the first time in a week. Clark quickly broke off eye contact. He used to see joy and happiness in her eyes. Now all their was was pain and hurt. He knew now that her laughing and shrieking was just a cover up. Deep down inside, she felt just a bad as Clark did.
~'Cuz we lost it all~
~Nothing lasts forever~
~I'm sorry~
~I can't be perfect~
~Now it's just too late and~
~We can't go back~
~I'm sorry~
~I can't be perfect~
~Nothing's gonna change the things that you said~
~Nothing's gonna make this right again~
~Please don't turn your back~
~I can't believe it's hard~
~Just to talk to you~
~But you don't understand~
~'Cuz we lost it all~
~Nothing lasts forever~
~I'm sorry~
~I can't be perfect~
~Now it's just too late and~
~We can't go back~
~I'm sorry~
~I can't be perfect~
*~*~*
" All right - see ya!" Pete shouted to his friends as they left.
After he was done waving to them, Clark notice him turn around and head towards the loft. The steps creaked as he hopped up them.
" You mean to tell me that you sat up here all day?" Pete questioned without even greeting Clark.
" Yup."
" With no food?"
" I never felt hungry."
" Or T.V.?"
" Didn't feel like T.V. either."
Pete walked over and sat down on the couch next to Clark.
" If you wanna move on, you gotta start doing it some time. Take Lana for example - she's feeling just as bad as you, but she's still havin' fun."
" Usually, when you want to get over a person, you try to have fun without that person around you," Clark stated casually.
" Then let's do something! We could watch Ms. America and make fun of all the contestants. Or go to Blockbuster and rent movies like I Know What You Did Last Summer and Rose Red and watch them with the lights off. That'll take your mind off love."
" Thanks, but no thanks, Pete. I'd rather just stay up here and think for a while," Clark confirmed as he leaned back in the couch and closed his eyes.
" Well, alright. It's not my business if you wanta stay hidden up here wallowing in your pity for the rest of Christmas vacation. I bet the Ms. America pagent will be really funny though, Clark. Remember last year, Ms. California - the girl with the chandellier on head -, tripped on her dress that looked like some one wrapped her up in bunch of toilet paper? Haha! We laughed for days! You sure you wanna miss watching something like that?" Pete asked as if he were waving a steak in front of a hungry tiger.
Clark smiled meekly.
" I'll pass," he confirmed.
" Well, I guess I'll tell you who wins tomorrow. Bye, Clark."
" Bye, Pete."
Clark heard his friend as he clammered down the wooden stairs and then crunched through the icy snow outside. He waited a few moments before the stood up and walked over to his C.D. player. He scanned all his C.D.s. They were all there except for the Lifehouse one. It reminded him to much of Lana so he put away in a drawer. He didn't think he would be listening to it for a while.
When finally found the perfect C.D., he put in it his player and then walked back to his place on the couch and closed his eyes again.
~There's a light in your eyes~
~That I use to see~
~And a song in the words~
~That you spoke to me~
~Was I wrong to believe~
~In your melody?~
~There's a light in your eyes~
~Did you leave that light burning for me?~
~Should I keep on waitin'~
~Or does love keep on fading away?~
~It's been a while since I've seen you so how have you been?~
~Did you get my letter I wrote you but I did not send?~
~I tried to call, your old number~
~But the voice of the girl on the phone~
~I recognized, but she told me~
~The number was wrong~
~There's a light in my eyes~
~But it's too bright to see~
~And a pain in my heart~
~Where you used to be~
~Guess I was wrong to assume~
~That you were waiting here for me~
~There's a light your eyes~
~Did you leave that light burning for me?~
*~*~*
A.n. Just in case you're wondering, the songfic in this was part of the song 'Perfect" by Simple Plan and part of 'Light In Your Eyes' by Blessid Union Of Souls. awesome songs! :o)