Disclaimer: ki-dokie, if ya wanna read me that bad, here I am!! And I own
nothing!! (duh. It's FAN FICTION after all)
"Okay," said Marik, regaining control over the situation. "Now, we all know what teams we are on. Our team gets the red piece."
"No!" Ryou said immediately. "I want the red piece! Bakura, can't I have the red piece? I want the red piece!"
"Hey, hey! We can solve this! Just give me the red piece, and you'll both be happy!" Jonouchi reasoned. Kaiba bopped him on the head.
"No, you stupid puppy. We shall have the green piece," he said as his eyes glazed over. "Yes. Green is the color of wealth and money. Green is the color of success! With this color gingerbread-man shaped playing piece, I shall topple empires while rising my own kingdom supreme!! I shall dominate all life and riches!! Mwahahahahahahahahaha!!" The others pretended not to notice as he tackled Jonouchi in his orgasm of greed.
"Ryou and Bakura should have the red piece, since the game belongs to them," Yami said slowly and clearly. "And WE'LL take the green piece."
"Damn you and your irresistible fairness," Malik pouted. "We'll take the blue piece then. I don't wanna get stuck with crummy old yellow. Yellow's a sissy color, right, Marik?"
"Shut up!" Marik said as he pulled down his shirt to conceal the yellow My Little Pony boxers he was wearing. Jonouchi pushed Kaiba off of him and panted for air.
"No...yellow...is not...my color..." he said. "We...will take blue."
Malik glared at him. "Why you..."
"No!" Bakura said. He had just run out of Advil. "No fighting! Malik, take the damn yellow. We're gonna finish this game if my life depends on it!!" He started to hyperventilate. Everybody scooted away a little, except for Ryou, who was pinned in Bakura's lap.
"It's okay, Bakura," Yugi said. "Remember, it's better to let it out than to bottle it in." Bakura's eyes popped out of his head as his face turned bright red. He then turned Ryou around and frenched him good.
"All better," he said cheerfully.
Ryou preferred to stay silent.
"Hey!" said Malik. "This is supposed to be Candyland, isn't it?"
"Yes," said Yami.
"Then why isn't there any candy, huh?" Everyone stared at him. "You know!! When you lick the board, it still tastes like paper! There should be some CANDY involved!!"
"But what kind of candy?" Ryou asked.
"Well, it says here CANDYSTICK FOREST," said Yami. "And these are the ICE CREAM FLOATS."
"GINGERBREAD PALACE," Jonouchi said. "MOLASSAS SWAMP."
"And GUMDROP...THINGY," Yugi added.
"Can't you read?" Bakura asked.
"Hey! There was a guy sitting in front of me a whole five feet tall!!" Yugi said defensively. "I couldn't see a thing!"
"Well, it is hard to see when you're SLEEPING," Yami teased.
"Where did Ryou go?" Malik asked suddenly.
They all turned around as a mountain of candy walked out of the kitchen. "I think I got everything," Ryou said from behind the pile. Sadly, he couldn't see where he was going and tripped over Kaiba. Ice cream, peppermint, gumdrops, molasses, and all kinds of sweets flew everywhere. Ryou pushed his now multi-colored hair out of his face as a tear ran down his candy-coated cheek.
"Don't worry, Ryou," Bakura said, pulling the gumdrop out of his nose. "At least there's candy on the board now. You did a good job on that!" Ryou sniffed and tried to smile as the others tried to get the important areas (eyes, mouth, groin, ect.) free of sugary substances.
"Okay," said Marik. "Now we have to see the board, so we'll clean off the squares. Does that bother anybody? Do we have to take a vote? Huh? Huh?! HUH?!" Everyone was very quiet.
"But-"
"THAT'S IT!!" Marik shrieked. He grabbed the closest thing to his Millenium rod (a pencil, you perv!) and blasted them all with a very whipped crème-like substance. The next thing anyone knew, they were all standing in the Shadow Realm, before a giant purple square.
"What the hell?" Kaiba asked, astonished. "My deck!"
"We have a bit of a more serious situation on our hands, Kaiba," Yami said smartly. "All we can see is this giant purple square!" Suddenly, he looked at one of Bakura's cookies as it fell from his head. He then stared from the cookie to Bakura as everyone else averted their eyes.
"For Re's sake, Pharaoh, look away," Malik hissed.
"But...but...wheeeeeee..." Yami said. Bakura screamed something intelligible and did the "I hate your guts" dance on the fallen cookie. And it was sad.
Jonouchi looked at Kaiba's deck. "Kaiba's right, though. There's just a big blue square in the middle of his card."
"Well, there's only two things for us to do," Marik said matter-of-factly. "Either stand here and screw like wild bunnies, or walk forward until we find out where we are."
Malik shrugged. "I'm kinda tired. Let's walk forward."
And so, our brave explorers, and Bakura, Ryou, Malik, Marik, Kaiba, Jonouchi, Yami, and Yugi, walked on the find the end of the purple square!! To be continued!!
"Okay," said Marik, regaining control over the situation. "Now, we all know what teams we are on. Our team gets the red piece."
"No!" Ryou said immediately. "I want the red piece! Bakura, can't I have the red piece? I want the red piece!"
"Hey, hey! We can solve this! Just give me the red piece, and you'll both be happy!" Jonouchi reasoned. Kaiba bopped him on the head.
"No, you stupid puppy. We shall have the green piece," he said as his eyes glazed over. "Yes. Green is the color of wealth and money. Green is the color of success! With this color gingerbread-man shaped playing piece, I shall topple empires while rising my own kingdom supreme!! I shall dominate all life and riches!! Mwahahahahahahahahaha!!" The others pretended not to notice as he tackled Jonouchi in his orgasm of greed.
"Ryou and Bakura should have the red piece, since the game belongs to them," Yami said slowly and clearly. "And WE'LL take the green piece."
"Damn you and your irresistible fairness," Malik pouted. "We'll take the blue piece then. I don't wanna get stuck with crummy old yellow. Yellow's a sissy color, right, Marik?"
"Shut up!" Marik said as he pulled down his shirt to conceal the yellow My Little Pony boxers he was wearing. Jonouchi pushed Kaiba off of him and panted for air.
"No...yellow...is not...my color..." he said. "We...will take blue."
Malik glared at him. "Why you..."
"No!" Bakura said. He had just run out of Advil. "No fighting! Malik, take the damn yellow. We're gonna finish this game if my life depends on it!!" He started to hyperventilate. Everybody scooted away a little, except for Ryou, who was pinned in Bakura's lap.
"It's okay, Bakura," Yugi said. "Remember, it's better to let it out than to bottle it in." Bakura's eyes popped out of his head as his face turned bright red. He then turned Ryou around and frenched him good.
"All better," he said cheerfully.
Ryou preferred to stay silent.
"Hey!" said Malik. "This is supposed to be Candyland, isn't it?"
"Yes," said Yami.
"Then why isn't there any candy, huh?" Everyone stared at him. "You know!! When you lick the board, it still tastes like paper! There should be some CANDY involved!!"
"But what kind of candy?" Ryou asked.
"Well, it says here CANDYSTICK FOREST," said Yami. "And these are the ICE CREAM FLOATS."
"GINGERBREAD PALACE," Jonouchi said. "MOLASSAS SWAMP."
"And GUMDROP...THINGY," Yugi added.
"Can't you read?" Bakura asked.
"Hey! There was a guy sitting in front of me a whole five feet tall!!" Yugi said defensively. "I couldn't see a thing!"
"Well, it is hard to see when you're SLEEPING," Yami teased.
"Where did Ryou go?" Malik asked suddenly.
They all turned around as a mountain of candy walked out of the kitchen. "I think I got everything," Ryou said from behind the pile. Sadly, he couldn't see where he was going and tripped over Kaiba. Ice cream, peppermint, gumdrops, molasses, and all kinds of sweets flew everywhere. Ryou pushed his now multi-colored hair out of his face as a tear ran down his candy-coated cheek.
"Don't worry, Ryou," Bakura said, pulling the gumdrop out of his nose. "At least there's candy on the board now. You did a good job on that!" Ryou sniffed and tried to smile as the others tried to get the important areas (eyes, mouth, groin, ect.) free of sugary substances.
"Okay," said Marik. "Now we have to see the board, so we'll clean off the squares. Does that bother anybody? Do we have to take a vote? Huh? Huh?! HUH?!" Everyone was very quiet.
"But-"
"THAT'S IT!!" Marik shrieked. He grabbed the closest thing to his Millenium rod (a pencil, you perv!) and blasted them all with a very whipped crème-like substance. The next thing anyone knew, they were all standing in the Shadow Realm, before a giant purple square.
"What the hell?" Kaiba asked, astonished. "My deck!"
"We have a bit of a more serious situation on our hands, Kaiba," Yami said smartly. "All we can see is this giant purple square!" Suddenly, he looked at one of Bakura's cookies as it fell from his head. He then stared from the cookie to Bakura as everyone else averted their eyes.
"For Re's sake, Pharaoh, look away," Malik hissed.
"But...but...wheeeeeee..." Yami said. Bakura screamed something intelligible and did the "I hate your guts" dance on the fallen cookie. And it was sad.
Jonouchi looked at Kaiba's deck. "Kaiba's right, though. There's just a big blue square in the middle of his card."
"Well, there's only two things for us to do," Marik said matter-of-factly. "Either stand here and screw like wild bunnies, or walk forward until we find out where we are."
Malik shrugged. "I'm kinda tired. Let's walk forward."
And so, our brave explorers, and Bakura, Ryou, Malik, Marik, Kaiba, Jonouchi, Yami, and Yugi, walked on the find the end of the purple square!! To be continued!!