Disclaimer: NOT MINE! *huff*
Kendo no Go
In The Language of Kendo
A Fanfic in 100 Chapters
Akai Kitsune
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19) Orders
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"Do this tonight."
A nod. Constant, calm, unquestioning loyalty and obedience.
'How on earth did I do it so long?'
When his friends actually allowed him to sit and brood about his past, Kenshin found himself wondering why he had trusted his commanders so easily. A single, neatly worded phrase, an envelope, the colour of ebony, slipped surreptitiously into the sleeve of his gi, sent him on his way that night, his katana dripping blood before morning.
So easy, it had seemed.
'I never asked, did I? Not once, for five years.'
'Not once.'
'Not until... until...'
"You've entrusted the decision to others, whom you follow regardless of how you may feel."
Tomoe's constant questioning of his actions had, for the first time since becoming the hitokiri, made him reconsider the truth about what duty really was. Who he really was.
"I'm just a hitokiri who brings the bloody rain."
And how often, as a child, had he wished for the rains to come and wash away his suffering, the suffering of his loved ones? How many times did he turn his eyes - wide and violet, yet empty of the innocence a child ought to have contained - to the empty, pale skies and wish for the clouds to roll about him and cry, even once?
If only to hide his own tears...
And when the rains came, bringing death, not the life he so desperately wanted, the clouds were dark and crimson.
"You are the one who makes the bloody rain fall."
"I'm only doing as ordered."
"Do this tonight."
Your wish is my command.
"Kenshin, can you please go into town and pick up some tofu?"
"Aa, Kaoru-dono."
"Kenshin, are you going to cook dinner tonight?"
"Aa."
"Kenshin, make sure the laundry is done by the time I get home, ne?"
"Aa."
"Kenshin, has the engawa been swept yet?"
"Aa."
"Kenshin, am I making you do too much?"
"Ah... iie, Kaoru-dono, I'm fine."
It was, it seemed to Kaoru, that very moment, when she finally realized at least one reason why Kenshin insisted on adding the honourific to her name.
-dono: 1. Miss or ma'am, in an archaic manner. 2. A respectful, yet archaic fashion in which a servant addresses his master.
Was she expecting too much from him?
I'm fine, Kaoru-dono.
Was she pushing him too hard?
It's all right, Kaoru-dono.
Did she force all the chores on him?
I can do more, Kaoru-dono.
Did she take advantage of him?
I'd be happy to help you, Kaoru-dono.
'No wonder we're not married yet. He treats me like the mistress of the house, because I send him around like my servant...'
'... am I really that bad?'
It wasn't as if she did nothing. It was her house, after all; she knew how to take care of it, and she had been doing so for years before Kenshin had wandered into her life. But... he did things so much better.
'What would I rather eat, his cooking or my own?'
'Should I be doing the laundry, or teaching at other dojos to earn income?'
'So many hard decisions... but in the end, it all comes down to Kenshin, doesn't it...'
'... When did I become so dependent on him?'
And he had certainly asked his fair share of questions, during their time together. But always questions; he had never really told her to do anything, even in the form of an inquiry.
"What's wrong, Kaoru-dono?"
"Are you all right?"
"Is it not good?"
"Did you sleep well?"
"Will you marry me, koishii?"
All right. So maybe he had caught her off guard now and then. She had come to look forward to his questions, his quiet, gentle concerns for her welfare. Perhaps, she gradually began to realize, that was his manner of caring for her, his way of showing her that yes, she meant something to him, moreso than a master ought to be.
And yes, she did love him in return, and yes, he did recognize that, and yes, he would love to get the tofu for her, today, everyday, anyday, koishii.
~*~
This ending was... unusual. But fun. Did I jump too quickly?
Another fun chapter. I'm glad I didn't get stuck too badly on chapter 18... I was so looking forward to writing the future stuff. Anyway...
The definition for "dono" was taken directly from my prior knowledge of the word. If anyone has a more specific definition, I would love to post it as a replacement, provided it includes (basically) the same examples I gave. And I just love the word "archaic", can you tell?
The original title for this chapter was "Command".
Reviewer Responses:
Calger459: Hm, I haven't actually considered bringing details of the party into the story... now that you've given me the idea, I may just have to incorporate it later on, ^_~ And I didn't much enjoy the parting of Sano and Kenshin in the manga. It was true to their characters... but it was still terribly disappointing! Oh well. That's what regret-fanfics are for, ne? Heh...
April-san: Just a tiny bit?! I think you hurt Sano's feelings on that one, ^_^;; Recently the chapter sizes have been shrinking. It's kind of sad. But I can only write what my muse tells me, I guess. Heh, Rurouni Sano is right!
Oryo: Glad the firefly one served its purpose! Yes, I like the idea of Kenshin and Sano's relationship remaining as strictly friendship, because they have such a strong bond, I would hate to ruin (in my eyes) it with a romantic relationship. Hm, that's true that Kaoru doesn't seem to have someone like that... her friendship with Tae doesn't seem as strong, and Misao is so far away it's hard to have that same sort of bond. I might just have to write that in at some point, ^_~
supernaturalove: The "jumping in front of the sword" was originally something for an omake, but after I put it in, I was so terribly amused, I couldn't bear to remove it... and you know how much I love Tomoe. I think I was trying to lighten the mood, and while I do believe Kenshin would be much more... er... sensitive? about the issue, it was simply a joke I couldn't erase. Many apologies. I do believe that Kenji must have had some moments of peace between himself and his father, at least until he got older and his feelings started to develop more. Kids change their minds so easily, ^_^ unfortunately adults tend to hold grudges.
Mir: I don't resent the delay; I'm rather honoured that you've reviewed, actually. ^_^ Besides, I have reason to duck. I'm too lazy to post at TFME yet! Oi... many thanks for the encouragement!
Girliegirl: Yes, Sanosuke! But this one - Kenshin! Heh.
More coming soon! I promise!