I Don't Give A Damn About You

Chapter 4



KEY: thoughts

Matt finally awoke, after falling asleep from emotional exhaustion, to find Tai petting his hair back from his face absent-mindedly as he stared off into space. A tear escaped from Matt's eyes before he could slam them shut at how he was so close to Tai so close to what he wanted and yet farther than ever before.

Tai at this very same moment was thinking about what to say to Matt when he woke up because he refused to let Matt shove his feelings away and not fully tell Tai what he was feeling. Tai was fully determined on helping Matt feel better and get through this, he was also trying to ignore lingering thoughts about that blonde blue eyed boy that were meant for girls. Weren't They? But even if they weren't, Matt is obviously straight. There's no way. Tai blinked away a couple tears that were forming and tried to concentrate on helping Matt feel better and not himself.

He looked down to see a tear drop onto the blankets as Matt reopened his eyes to see Tai staring down at him. He had stopped brushing back his hair and, if Matt had been paying attention he would have noticed the light blush across Tai's cheeks embarrassed at being caught doing so.

Matt sat up quickly mumbling something about going to the bathroom when Tai caught his arm spinning him around. Matt looked wide eyed at Tai's determined and set expression.

"Matt. Please tell me what your going through. It's not going to just go away. Please let me help you."

"You can't help me Tai. You just can't understand. No one can." Matt retorted his expression dark and serious.

"Matt. I've been dumped before, I've been depressed before,.... Why can't you really let me in?" Tai asked waiting with bated breath for the answer.

"Tai...I...I...can't...I'm alone...I thought...I thought....maybe...." Unable to finish and hold back his tears as his lip began to tremble. He shrugged angrily at his own weakness, wishing he could sink through the carpet. I'm such a cry baby. Why do I have to be so pathetic, especially in front of Tai.

"Matt, Your not alone! I'm here for you. I always will be. I want to help you and to-to take away your pain. But I can't unless you let me get close enough to help you." Tai said grabbing Matt's shoulder's firmly and looking into Matt's cold blue eyes. "Let me help you. Please..."

"I thought...I didn't have to be alone...I thought I could be happy with her...But even she got tired of me...no one understands..." Matt whispered as Tai pulled him into a hug letting him take comfort in his arms. (More comfort than Tai probably suspected, ne?)

"Your not alone. I'm here for you. I'm...I'm your best friend." He said wavering as he realized, truly, how he wanted to be more. With Matt wrapped in his arms, he wanted this to last forever. I wish...I wish he could be mine.

Matt gave in to Tai in that moment. He let himself trust in Tai and open up. One more time. I like him so much and he's always been there for me. He hasn't abandoned me yet. It might last...

What seemed like a lifetime later, though probably more like twenty minutes, they broke apart and each had sorrowful smiles filled with regrets and some happiness on their faces.

"Thank you." They both said at the same time. They both smiled more at this the sorrow in them slipping a little farther away.

"Tai, thank you. You've made life worth living." Matt said staring deeply into Tai's chocolate brown eyes, wishing he could tell him how much more he felt. Just then the door bell rang. Since his mom and brother were still gone they shared curious expressions before walking over to the doorway.

Tai opened the doorway and a girl flew through it throwing her arms around Matt.

"Matt I was so worried. I'm so sorry. I heard what happened. If I'd known...We can try again..."

Matt was frozen terror and horror freezing his every thought and movement. His Ex-girlfriend was wrapped around his center telling him how she wanted him back. Tai was ready to rip her head off rage coursing threw his whole body like wild fire.



Author's Note: Yay. I managed to whip this chappie up right before I got to bed. Hope you like it. Thanks Rei for the idea for the cliffhanger! Hope you like this chapter! Thanks to all who reviewed! R/R PLEASE! I dedicate this chapter to all of my reviewers! Thanks!