:. Chapter Three .::. Buffy
"I'm going to have to show you, aren't I?" she asked, more to herself than to me. "Come on." She took my arm.
"Where are we going?" I asked. She led me to the edge of the pond.
"Look." She pointed to the smooth white ice. I glanced at it.
"Yep. It's ice. What about it?" I asked. She smiled a little.
"Have patience, child. Look!" she nodded. I looked back at the pond. I gasped. A picture was forming there. Willow, Tara, Anya, Xander, Dawn, and Giles were all standing in a graveyard in the middle of the day. They were all wearing black, and looking at a fresh grave. Anya moved into Xander's arms, giving me a clear view of the headstone. I suddenly felt as if I had swallowed a bucket of ice. The headstone read BUFFY SUMMERS. I didn't read the rest. I couldn't. I could just stare.
"What is this?" I demanded of the woman when I got my voice back. She shook her head.
"Look at your friends, and your family. Watch." She said. I forced myself to look back. I studied my friends intently. Xander was holding Anya, his face had lost its usual look of mischief. His eyes were bright with tears. Anya had her face buried in Xander's suit jacket. Willow and Tara were holding hands tightly, both crying. Giles had a lost look as he stared at my headstone, almost as if he didn't believe what he was seeing. Dawn almost broke my heart. Her face was set and pale. She seemed almost unemotional.
Slowly, they all left together. The scene stayed the same, but faded into night. Everything was still, then a lone figure walked up to the. . .my grave. My heart caught in my chest. Spike. He just stood in front, looking at the words carved into the headstone. Then he sat down on the grass cross-legged. He started talking. I couldn't hear what he was saying, but he had a small smile on his face, the same uncertain smile he had given me so often. His eyes, though, they were sad. They were as dead as stone, and I saw the true pain he held inside.
"What was he saying?" I asked softly, not even realizing I spoke aloud. The woman heard me, and smiled.
"He was talking to you. That night, he was telling you about how Dawn had been writing things, and it reminded him of what he had done, except hers was prettier than anything he had ever done. Then he told you about the patrol he had just done, letting you know the world was safe. He did this every night. He just sat there and watched all night, whenever he didn't have to watch Dawn, which he did often, keeping his word to protect her. But he always made sure to visit." She explained. I returned my gaze to the picture. Spike disappeared.
The picture changed, showing the tower again. I saw Dawn at the top. I saw myself running up to save her, and the portal opening again. But instead of me running and diving into the portal, Dawn and I ran together, hands clasped, running and leaping into the middle of it, and then landing on the ground on our feet, hugging. She looked happy, and so did I. We had saved the world together. Everyone ran up to us and we all embraced happily. All of a sudden, Glory, a giant, smirking Glory came and snatched me from the midst of my friends, leaving Dawn alone.
The image disappeared to show Dawn sit up in bed, suddenly. She started crying. It had been a dream, Dawn's.
There were more dreams like it, Willow used her magic to close the portal, Xander jumped through himself, Giles stopped Glory himself from the beginning, and saved Dawn, who was really me at the top of the tower. But the best way I was rescued was by Spike. In his dream, I leaped through the portal, and he leaped through after me. Halfway through, white light all around us, he caught me and together we landed smoothly on the ground. I was in his arms, and he smiled at me. The dream me smiled back at him.
I remembered what he had told me when I had first come back; "I saved you every night, a hundred different ways." I jumped, feeling something hit my hand. I realized it was my own tears. I wiped them off and looked at the woman.
"What do you want to show me from this?" I asked.
"That you were missed. When you died, you ripped their very lives apart. That is why you did not die a second time." She explained. "You could not do it to them again. Your time to die for the sake of the world has passed."
"Third." I corrected before I could stop myself.
"What?"
"That would have been the third time I died." I explained. She nodded.
"I'm sorry. But you see? There was a purpose to your not dying. Everything turned out all right." She said. I stared at her.
"What do you mean everything was all right? Spike is dead, okay. The one guy I loved, and didn't chase away is dead." I exploded. She didn't seem to hear me.
"Hello?" I asked impatiently, a little worried. I mean, this old lady suddenly pops into her own world. Not good. But she gave me a look.
"Shh." She said sternly. Then she smiled as her eyes went out of focus. I looked around, trying to figure out the best way to get help for this lady.
"All right. I'm sorry." She said. I looked at her in surprise. She seemed okay.
"Now what?" I asked.
"Now I will show you the good that came of it all." She said.
:. Spike
I followed the old man back outside and down a sidewalk. I thought of the Viper parked in the parking-lot of the bar, but I didn't say anything. The man led me to a park, and to a small pond in the center. It was frozen over, and very pretty in the lightly falling snow.
"What are we doing out here? It's cold." I complained. The man laughed.
"And this comes from someone with no body temperature. Buck up, kid. We've got a lot to see." He said. I frowned.
"See? What are we seeing?" I asked.
"Patience, William. Look." He waved a hand at the pond. I looked back down at the smooth ice. My eyes widened as a picture formed. It was the school. I saw myself which was a little weird. I was standing in the sunlight, skin beginning to sizzle. Buffy was there. She took my hand and our entwined hands burst into flame. The me down there looked at our hands in amazement. Then he looked at Buffy. She spoke, and I remembered. She said she loved me. I told her, No you don't, but thanks for saying it. Then I told her to go, adding a little humor by saying school was out. She gave me one last look and ran up the stairs.
The pond-picture switched, showing Giles herding all the girls onto a school-bus. Everyone ran to the bus. Xander was still inside, yelling. He looked around frantically. The picture showed all the turok- hans on the ground, then a human. She was beaten and bloody. The picture showed her face and my eyes widened. Anya. My breath caught. She was dead. That's why I hadn't smelled her near Buffy's house. She was gone. I instantly felt bad, kind of like I should have known.
The picture showed everyone on the bus. Andrew, the kid, looked dazed and in shock. Dawn looked anxious, many of the girls were beat up, and there were noticeably less. Xander looked sad, Willow looked exhausted. Faith sat by Wood, looking a little worried. Giles looked out the window. They were all looking for Buffy. The picture switched to show her running up the stairs, along the roof as it crumbled. She jumped from rooftop to rooftop, finally landing on the moving bus. They drove out of Sunnydale and then looked in amazement at the giant hole where Sunnydale was.
I stared, not at the people, but at the hole. That was a big hole. That was my hole. I made a really big hole. I spotted the large "WELCOME TO SUNNYDALE" sign laying face up on top of the pile. I laughed.
"Even after I destroy the whole city, I can't break that bloody sign." I remarked. The old man looked at me sternly.
"That's all you notice?" he asked. I raised an eyebrow.
"Okay, you see that hole? I did that. That was me. That's my crater, once known as Sunnydale. I'm sorry if I'm not getting your message. I'm just impressed with my bloody huge hole. Pleased with the simple things, mate." I replied. Suddenly, my hole disappeared.
"I'm here to help you, Spike." The man said sharply. "Do you want to know what I'm trying to say or not?" I nodded, somewhat embarrassed.
"Sorry." I said quietly. He nodded, face softening once again. I returned my gaze to the pond. The focus was on everyone.
"You saved all these people, Spike. They're all alive, this world is still here because of you." The old man said. I nodded.
"Yeah. Champion and all that." I said slowly. "But what happened after? Where's everyone now? I know Anya's dead. Buffy and Dawn are happy. What about everyone else?" The man raised his eyebrows but didn't comment.
"Look." He said simply. I looked. The pond showed a picture of Faith. She was laughing. The principal, Wood, came into the picture, also laughing. Faith held up a hand sporting a small diamond ring. Wood smiled at her and then kissed her. The image faded and another took its place. It was a wedding. Faith and Wood's wedding. I laughed softly. The tough Slayer wore a dress. It was amazing.
"These two fared well. They left the rest of the group and joined together." The man commented.
"Why did they leave everyone else?" I asked. "I thought Buffy and Faith had called a truce." The man nodded.
"Yes, there aren't any qualms between Faith and Buffy, but there's a certain amount of distrust between Buffy and Robin Wood. She refuses to forgive him for what he tried to do to you." He said. I smiled.
"That's my girl. She won't lay down a grudge easily." I said, reminiscing. The old man smiled.
"Would you like to see where the couple is now?" he asked. I nodded.
"Sure. Why not." I replied. I looked into the pond. The wedding image faded and a new one took its place. I laughed outright. A pregnant Faith was sitting on a couch. Wood walked into the room. He smiled and said something. Faith laughed, looking in the direction he was. I noticed a small Christmas tree in one corner of the room and realized what they were talking about. On the top of the tree was a figure that was once an angel, though the halo and wings had been ripped off and a tiny wooden stake had been placed in her hand. It was a Slayer tree-topper. Very Faith. She loved what she did and based her life around it.
"The baby is due in March." The old man said. I shook my head.
"That is going to be one wild kid." I commented. The old man laughed.
"Yes, I expect so." He agreed.
"So, that's the fate of them two. I like Faith. She's a nice girl." I made a face. "All right, not really. But seeing as I'm a Big Bad myself, I like bad girls. I really don't like the principal though." The man shrugged.
"I suppose you have good reason." He said. "However it must be said that he did not hate you quite so much after you saved the world." I grinned.
"Oh yeah. Standing around in the sunlight wearing a magic amulet is a definite vote." I remarked.
"It's not what you did, it's more that you actually did it." the old man explained. "You rose above everyone's expectations by remaining in the school, dying for the world. Almost no one expected you to go through with it." I looked up.
"Almost?" I asked. The man looked at me.
"She believed in you. That's why she gave you the amulet in the first place. She believed you would do it. She trusted you." He said softly. I looked back down.
"I know." I replied evenly, but quietly. And I did. Do.
:. Buffy
I was ready to see what else the woman had to show me. I looked into the pond. I gasped. Girls faces were flashing through the pond.
"Slayers. It was your doing, Buffy. You gave them the power. Your friend, the witch, Willow cast the spell, but it was your courage to break the rule that caused her to cast it in the first place. And it was your faith in her." The old woman explained. I nodded slowly.
"They're all. . .there are so many." I breathed in amazement. The image rippled, and when it cleared I saw a dressed-up office, and one man I absolutely hated walked into the room, followed by other members of the Watcher's Council. The number was considerably smaller.
"The men of the Watcher's Council, still led by your friend Quentin Travers, have taken it upon themselves to rebuild the Council and recruit and train new members. They have been taking in Slayers and training them, and are setting up a boarding school for Slayers." The woman said. I made a face.
"Yeah, great! We're gonna have a bunch of cute little clones that are completely obedient to the Watcher's Council." I grumbled. The woman laughed.
"Don't worry. Hopefully he has realized things are sometimes better without everything completely controlled. Though it is doubtful." She replied. I laughed too.
"I bet he was pissed when we broke the Rule of One." I said. She nodded, smiling.
"yes, he was very upset when he had found out what you had done, but he did enjoy that he was able to have an army of Slayers at his command." She said. I rolled my eyes.
"Typical. As long as he doesn't send his little army after me, I'm happy." I said. "Moving on?" The lady nodded. I returned my gaze to the pond. The image now showed our Magic Box and the Slayer classes we had set up. I saw myself, teaching a wide range of girls, the oldest being Linda, at age 37, and the youngest being Tiffany, at age 6. All the girls and women got along pretty well. I liked them all too. We were all kicking bags filled with sand and water both.
"Look at what you have done with these Slayers. You have trained them all, and given them the precious knowledge that they are not the only ones who woke up with strange powers one day." The old lady said. "You gave them hope."
"They're all great girls." I said. "We have a lot of fun."
"If you had died, they would still be lost." The lady pointed out. (That's why we're seeing this, remember?) I sighed.
"I know. It doesn't help though." I replied. "I just feel like. . .like I should have been down there with him. It's not what I did do for everyone else that bothers me. It's what I didn't do for him."
"But you did everything he wanted, dear. He didn't want you down there with him. He understood that. He knew you loved him." The old woman explained. I sighed.
"No, he didn't. He denied it. He died thinking I only loved him because he was saving the world, because he was going to die." I explained. The lady shook her head.
"Don't you remember?" she looked down at the frozen waters. I followed her gaze. The beautiful night he and I shared appeared. Where he had just held me, made me feel secure. He had watched me while I slept. And I had known I was safe.
"This night meant so much to him. You had trusted him, he had clamed you and helped you realize what you had to do. This was the one night he had dreamed of. It never was about the physical part. It meant nothing to him without you feeling something. That night he got everything he had wanted. You had felt something, and shown it. He knew that night you loved him." The old woman explained.
"Then why would he deny it? He looked so amused. . ." I trailed off, remembering his smile, like when you're a kid telling an adult thank you after your mother instructed you to.
"He knew you wouldn't leave if he let you know he accepted it. He had to hurt you to get you to live. Everything he had done would be in vain if you had died alongside him." The woman said.
"He did know?" I asked. The lady nodded.
"He did know." She replied. She looked at me. "Hm. Your still having doubts, aren't you?"
"I can't explain it. I just don't feel like I should be the one living." I said. She sighed.
"Well, just watch. Maybe you'll see something that would change your mind. It's time to show you other things, things you need to see." The old woman replied. I looked into the pool as a smiling Xander appeared.
:. End Three
Okay. This is haaard. The whole slicing-it-all-up-to-make-it-fit thing.
Anyway, I wanna address some reviews 'cos. . .um. . .I want to. I KNOW chapter 3 was chapter two again since, like yesterday, and I didn't mean to put it up twice, it just kinda happened that way and I didn't know how to take it off. Hence the note "DO NOT READ" in the chapter name. Sorry.
Second, to you who keeps telling me to put Lindsey in there, sorry, but no. Point a) I don't know Lindsey very well, so I don't think I could write him. Point b) I don't think he could possibly fit in here. . .with a point.
Lastly, to all you who are loving it, YAY and thanx much. Now, leave more reviews and make this slicing and dicing and killing my computer easier?
(I apologize, I just took an Alka-Seltzer Plus Night Time and I'm kinda getting loopy. Nighty!)
"I'm going to have to show you, aren't I?" she asked, more to herself than to me. "Come on." She took my arm.
"Where are we going?" I asked. She led me to the edge of the pond.
"Look." She pointed to the smooth white ice. I glanced at it.
"Yep. It's ice. What about it?" I asked. She smiled a little.
"Have patience, child. Look!" she nodded. I looked back at the pond. I gasped. A picture was forming there. Willow, Tara, Anya, Xander, Dawn, and Giles were all standing in a graveyard in the middle of the day. They were all wearing black, and looking at a fresh grave. Anya moved into Xander's arms, giving me a clear view of the headstone. I suddenly felt as if I had swallowed a bucket of ice. The headstone read BUFFY SUMMERS. I didn't read the rest. I couldn't. I could just stare.
"What is this?" I demanded of the woman when I got my voice back. She shook her head.
"Look at your friends, and your family. Watch." She said. I forced myself to look back. I studied my friends intently. Xander was holding Anya, his face had lost its usual look of mischief. His eyes were bright with tears. Anya had her face buried in Xander's suit jacket. Willow and Tara were holding hands tightly, both crying. Giles had a lost look as he stared at my headstone, almost as if he didn't believe what he was seeing. Dawn almost broke my heart. Her face was set and pale. She seemed almost unemotional.
Slowly, they all left together. The scene stayed the same, but faded into night. Everything was still, then a lone figure walked up to the. . .my grave. My heart caught in my chest. Spike. He just stood in front, looking at the words carved into the headstone. Then he sat down on the grass cross-legged. He started talking. I couldn't hear what he was saying, but he had a small smile on his face, the same uncertain smile he had given me so often. His eyes, though, they were sad. They were as dead as stone, and I saw the true pain he held inside.
"What was he saying?" I asked softly, not even realizing I spoke aloud. The woman heard me, and smiled.
"He was talking to you. That night, he was telling you about how Dawn had been writing things, and it reminded him of what he had done, except hers was prettier than anything he had ever done. Then he told you about the patrol he had just done, letting you know the world was safe. He did this every night. He just sat there and watched all night, whenever he didn't have to watch Dawn, which he did often, keeping his word to protect her. But he always made sure to visit." She explained. I returned my gaze to the picture. Spike disappeared.
The picture changed, showing the tower again. I saw Dawn at the top. I saw myself running up to save her, and the portal opening again. But instead of me running and diving into the portal, Dawn and I ran together, hands clasped, running and leaping into the middle of it, and then landing on the ground on our feet, hugging. She looked happy, and so did I. We had saved the world together. Everyone ran up to us and we all embraced happily. All of a sudden, Glory, a giant, smirking Glory came and snatched me from the midst of my friends, leaving Dawn alone.
The image disappeared to show Dawn sit up in bed, suddenly. She started crying. It had been a dream, Dawn's.
There were more dreams like it, Willow used her magic to close the portal, Xander jumped through himself, Giles stopped Glory himself from the beginning, and saved Dawn, who was really me at the top of the tower. But the best way I was rescued was by Spike. In his dream, I leaped through the portal, and he leaped through after me. Halfway through, white light all around us, he caught me and together we landed smoothly on the ground. I was in his arms, and he smiled at me. The dream me smiled back at him.
I remembered what he had told me when I had first come back; "I saved you every night, a hundred different ways." I jumped, feeling something hit my hand. I realized it was my own tears. I wiped them off and looked at the woman.
"What do you want to show me from this?" I asked.
"That you were missed. When you died, you ripped their very lives apart. That is why you did not die a second time." She explained. "You could not do it to them again. Your time to die for the sake of the world has passed."
"Third." I corrected before I could stop myself.
"What?"
"That would have been the third time I died." I explained. She nodded.
"I'm sorry. But you see? There was a purpose to your not dying. Everything turned out all right." She said. I stared at her.
"What do you mean everything was all right? Spike is dead, okay. The one guy I loved, and didn't chase away is dead." I exploded. She didn't seem to hear me.
"Hello?" I asked impatiently, a little worried. I mean, this old lady suddenly pops into her own world. Not good. But she gave me a look.
"Shh." She said sternly. Then she smiled as her eyes went out of focus. I looked around, trying to figure out the best way to get help for this lady.
"All right. I'm sorry." She said. I looked at her in surprise. She seemed okay.
"Now what?" I asked.
"Now I will show you the good that came of it all." She said.
:. Spike
I followed the old man back outside and down a sidewalk. I thought of the Viper parked in the parking-lot of the bar, but I didn't say anything. The man led me to a park, and to a small pond in the center. It was frozen over, and very pretty in the lightly falling snow.
"What are we doing out here? It's cold." I complained. The man laughed.
"And this comes from someone with no body temperature. Buck up, kid. We've got a lot to see." He said. I frowned.
"See? What are we seeing?" I asked.
"Patience, William. Look." He waved a hand at the pond. I looked back down at the smooth ice. My eyes widened as a picture formed. It was the school. I saw myself which was a little weird. I was standing in the sunlight, skin beginning to sizzle. Buffy was there. She took my hand and our entwined hands burst into flame. The me down there looked at our hands in amazement. Then he looked at Buffy. She spoke, and I remembered. She said she loved me. I told her, No you don't, but thanks for saying it. Then I told her to go, adding a little humor by saying school was out. She gave me one last look and ran up the stairs.
The pond-picture switched, showing Giles herding all the girls onto a school-bus. Everyone ran to the bus. Xander was still inside, yelling. He looked around frantically. The picture showed all the turok- hans on the ground, then a human. She was beaten and bloody. The picture showed her face and my eyes widened. Anya. My breath caught. She was dead. That's why I hadn't smelled her near Buffy's house. She was gone. I instantly felt bad, kind of like I should have known.
The picture showed everyone on the bus. Andrew, the kid, looked dazed and in shock. Dawn looked anxious, many of the girls were beat up, and there were noticeably less. Xander looked sad, Willow looked exhausted. Faith sat by Wood, looking a little worried. Giles looked out the window. They were all looking for Buffy. The picture switched to show her running up the stairs, along the roof as it crumbled. She jumped from rooftop to rooftop, finally landing on the moving bus. They drove out of Sunnydale and then looked in amazement at the giant hole where Sunnydale was.
I stared, not at the people, but at the hole. That was a big hole. That was my hole. I made a really big hole. I spotted the large "WELCOME TO SUNNYDALE" sign laying face up on top of the pile. I laughed.
"Even after I destroy the whole city, I can't break that bloody sign." I remarked. The old man looked at me sternly.
"That's all you notice?" he asked. I raised an eyebrow.
"Okay, you see that hole? I did that. That was me. That's my crater, once known as Sunnydale. I'm sorry if I'm not getting your message. I'm just impressed with my bloody huge hole. Pleased with the simple things, mate." I replied. Suddenly, my hole disappeared.
"I'm here to help you, Spike." The man said sharply. "Do you want to know what I'm trying to say or not?" I nodded, somewhat embarrassed.
"Sorry." I said quietly. He nodded, face softening once again. I returned my gaze to the pond. The focus was on everyone.
"You saved all these people, Spike. They're all alive, this world is still here because of you." The old man said. I nodded.
"Yeah. Champion and all that." I said slowly. "But what happened after? Where's everyone now? I know Anya's dead. Buffy and Dawn are happy. What about everyone else?" The man raised his eyebrows but didn't comment.
"Look." He said simply. I looked. The pond showed a picture of Faith. She was laughing. The principal, Wood, came into the picture, also laughing. Faith held up a hand sporting a small diamond ring. Wood smiled at her and then kissed her. The image faded and another took its place. It was a wedding. Faith and Wood's wedding. I laughed softly. The tough Slayer wore a dress. It was amazing.
"These two fared well. They left the rest of the group and joined together." The man commented.
"Why did they leave everyone else?" I asked. "I thought Buffy and Faith had called a truce." The man nodded.
"Yes, there aren't any qualms between Faith and Buffy, but there's a certain amount of distrust between Buffy and Robin Wood. She refuses to forgive him for what he tried to do to you." He said. I smiled.
"That's my girl. She won't lay down a grudge easily." I said, reminiscing. The old man smiled.
"Would you like to see where the couple is now?" he asked. I nodded.
"Sure. Why not." I replied. I looked into the pond. The wedding image faded and a new one took its place. I laughed outright. A pregnant Faith was sitting on a couch. Wood walked into the room. He smiled and said something. Faith laughed, looking in the direction he was. I noticed a small Christmas tree in one corner of the room and realized what they were talking about. On the top of the tree was a figure that was once an angel, though the halo and wings had been ripped off and a tiny wooden stake had been placed in her hand. It was a Slayer tree-topper. Very Faith. She loved what she did and based her life around it.
"The baby is due in March." The old man said. I shook my head.
"That is going to be one wild kid." I commented. The old man laughed.
"Yes, I expect so." He agreed.
"So, that's the fate of them two. I like Faith. She's a nice girl." I made a face. "All right, not really. But seeing as I'm a Big Bad myself, I like bad girls. I really don't like the principal though." The man shrugged.
"I suppose you have good reason." He said. "However it must be said that he did not hate you quite so much after you saved the world." I grinned.
"Oh yeah. Standing around in the sunlight wearing a magic amulet is a definite vote." I remarked.
"It's not what you did, it's more that you actually did it." the old man explained. "You rose above everyone's expectations by remaining in the school, dying for the world. Almost no one expected you to go through with it." I looked up.
"Almost?" I asked. The man looked at me.
"She believed in you. That's why she gave you the amulet in the first place. She believed you would do it. She trusted you." He said softly. I looked back down.
"I know." I replied evenly, but quietly. And I did. Do.
:. Buffy
I was ready to see what else the woman had to show me. I looked into the pond. I gasped. Girls faces were flashing through the pond.
"Slayers. It was your doing, Buffy. You gave them the power. Your friend, the witch, Willow cast the spell, but it was your courage to break the rule that caused her to cast it in the first place. And it was your faith in her." The old woman explained. I nodded slowly.
"They're all. . .there are so many." I breathed in amazement. The image rippled, and when it cleared I saw a dressed-up office, and one man I absolutely hated walked into the room, followed by other members of the Watcher's Council. The number was considerably smaller.
"The men of the Watcher's Council, still led by your friend Quentin Travers, have taken it upon themselves to rebuild the Council and recruit and train new members. They have been taking in Slayers and training them, and are setting up a boarding school for Slayers." The woman said. I made a face.
"Yeah, great! We're gonna have a bunch of cute little clones that are completely obedient to the Watcher's Council." I grumbled. The woman laughed.
"Don't worry. Hopefully he has realized things are sometimes better without everything completely controlled. Though it is doubtful." She replied. I laughed too.
"I bet he was pissed when we broke the Rule of One." I said. She nodded, smiling.
"yes, he was very upset when he had found out what you had done, but he did enjoy that he was able to have an army of Slayers at his command." She said. I rolled my eyes.
"Typical. As long as he doesn't send his little army after me, I'm happy." I said. "Moving on?" The lady nodded. I returned my gaze to the pond. The image now showed our Magic Box and the Slayer classes we had set up. I saw myself, teaching a wide range of girls, the oldest being Linda, at age 37, and the youngest being Tiffany, at age 6. All the girls and women got along pretty well. I liked them all too. We were all kicking bags filled with sand and water both.
"Look at what you have done with these Slayers. You have trained them all, and given them the precious knowledge that they are not the only ones who woke up with strange powers one day." The old lady said. "You gave them hope."
"They're all great girls." I said. "We have a lot of fun."
"If you had died, they would still be lost." The lady pointed out. (That's why we're seeing this, remember?) I sighed.
"I know. It doesn't help though." I replied. "I just feel like. . .like I should have been down there with him. It's not what I did do for everyone else that bothers me. It's what I didn't do for him."
"But you did everything he wanted, dear. He didn't want you down there with him. He understood that. He knew you loved him." The old woman explained. I sighed.
"No, he didn't. He denied it. He died thinking I only loved him because he was saving the world, because he was going to die." I explained. The lady shook her head.
"Don't you remember?" she looked down at the frozen waters. I followed her gaze. The beautiful night he and I shared appeared. Where he had just held me, made me feel secure. He had watched me while I slept. And I had known I was safe.
"This night meant so much to him. You had trusted him, he had clamed you and helped you realize what you had to do. This was the one night he had dreamed of. It never was about the physical part. It meant nothing to him without you feeling something. That night he got everything he had wanted. You had felt something, and shown it. He knew that night you loved him." The old woman explained.
"Then why would he deny it? He looked so amused. . ." I trailed off, remembering his smile, like when you're a kid telling an adult thank you after your mother instructed you to.
"He knew you wouldn't leave if he let you know he accepted it. He had to hurt you to get you to live. Everything he had done would be in vain if you had died alongside him." The woman said.
"He did know?" I asked. The lady nodded.
"He did know." She replied. She looked at me. "Hm. Your still having doubts, aren't you?"
"I can't explain it. I just don't feel like I should be the one living." I said. She sighed.
"Well, just watch. Maybe you'll see something that would change your mind. It's time to show you other things, things you need to see." The old woman replied. I looked into the pool as a smiling Xander appeared.
:. End Three
Okay. This is haaard. The whole slicing-it-all-up-to-make-it-fit thing.
Anyway, I wanna address some reviews 'cos. . .um. . .I want to. I KNOW chapter 3 was chapter two again since, like yesterday, and I didn't mean to put it up twice, it just kinda happened that way and I didn't know how to take it off. Hence the note "DO NOT READ" in the chapter name. Sorry.
Second, to you who keeps telling me to put Lindsey in there, sorry, but no. Point a) I don't know Lindsey very well, so I don't think I could write him. Point b) I don't think he could possibly fit in here. . .with a point.
Lastly, to all you who are loving it, YAY and thanx much. Now, leave more reviews and make this slicing and dicing and killing my computer easier?
(I apologize, I just took an Alka-Seltzer Plus Night Time and I'm kinda getting loopy. Nighty!)