A/N: I have writers' block on my fic Vita so to vent I wrote this.

A/N: No Phoebes were harmed or diseased in this chapter of The Secret Life of Kit.

A/N: *laughs evilly* Hey, Health Class is good for something!!

Important A/N: You ppl are too funny. The reviews are hilarious! Not only are they funny but one is very informative on DUCKS!! Woo!! Quack?! I urge you ppl to read them.

I Want To Call Myself That!

Kit walks in the manor door after a busy day of finding 'Special' a job.

I know you're probably asking yourself, What in the hell is Kit doing looking for a job for the 'Special'? The answer is simple my friends, the newspaper and the brothel aren't ranking in enough doe as it used too.

So 'Special' has to get a third job because Paige is devoted to the craft and Piper has the Club, Apple aka Leo and the brat, I mean baby to look after.

Anyhoo Kit hangs up her coat and hat, places her briefcase down on the floor. "'Special' I'm home," Kit yells.

Phoebe comes to the manor's front door crawl on all four's with a newspaper in her mouth. Kit grabs the newspaper and whacks Phoebe in the head. " 'Special' how many times do I have to tell you the newspaper is not food?"

"Um I don't know how many," questions Phoebe. Kit then whacks her again.

"Never mind. Anyway I got you job as a poster child for Chlamydia. You have to go at 415 to take some pictures ok?"

"Oh Kit you're the greatest!!" You bastards!

"Oh 'Special' you're truly that 'Special' huh?"

"Well of course I am. Um Kit what is Chlamydia? It's a pretty name and I want to name my kid that!! "

"Um yeah it's a great name for your future kid. Chlamydia is um *cough**snicker**cough* a flower. Yes, a lovely flower that um also goes by the name of bacteria Chlamydia trachomatis."

"Is the flower pretty?"

"Yes it is. It's so pretty that nobody would want to touch it because of its immense prettiness."

"Oh Kit I want to change my name to Chlamydia!!!"

"What about naming it your kid after it"

"Screw my kid. I'm out of here."

Oh that sly Kit. How nice of you to get Phoebe a job.

Chlamydia Halliwell has a nice ring to it. Much better than ol' Phoebe Halliwell which is so last season.

A/N: Please review about this story or just about Chlamydia and its friend Syphilis.