Rose, Get Your Ass Off The Couch!

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Disclaimer: Do you really think that, I poor person that I am own anything in this fic?

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"Popcorn?" Cal passed the bowl over to Rose. The two of them had spent the last week watching TV together, and Cal had memorized Rose's snacking routines.

She was a Light Snacker, as opposed to him, a Heavy Snacker. The daytime programs had since been filled with the sounds of Mass-Munching rather than the usual sounds of Cal wailing like a banshee.

"OOH! The new season of "Crank Yankers" !" Rose squealed excitedly. Cal began hopping in his seat. "I just loooooooove those puppets! Their so CUTE!!" He clapped his hands together rapidly.

"Uh, guys?" Fabrizo stood in the door. "Yeah?" "Where's the mop?" Cal sighed. "Why would you need the mop?" "Well, I was making pudding and decided to mix some tea into it, and then the water boiled and the pasta began to slide off the cabinet, and--"

"That's quite enough," Rose said, holding her hand up. "Well, can you get me the mop?" Fabrizo shifted from foot to foot.

"No." His face fell. "But, I have to clean the mess-" "No, I will clean it." "Why?" Rose asked. "He can do it." Cal looked at her. "Are you insane?" "I've been told I was."

"That explains why you would want Fabrizo to clean something!!" Fabrizo interrupted the argument. "Uh, I really need to clean this stuff."

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Dinner, the same day.

"Uh, Rose?" Jack was nervous. "Yeah?" "Why haven't you been going to work?" "Work?" "Yes, Rose work. We had this talk a long, long time ago. A job."

"How would you know if I was staying home?" "Well………" Rose darted a venomous glance at Fabrizo, who only shrugged. "So?" "Shouldn't you like…get another job…or something?"

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The Next Morning.

Rose sat on the couch. Cal sat in the chair, his eyes glued to the TV. Jack was preparing to leave for work, but stopped off in the living room.

"Rose?" "Yeah?" She didn't move. "What are you doing?" "Watching "The Brady Bunch." "Ah."

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Two days later.

"Rose?" "Yes?" "Uh, how long are you going to sit on the couch, watching TV?" "I dunno." "TV rocks." Cal giggled.

"And you're doing it with him" "So? Am I such a bad person?" Cal looked offended.

"No, but she….I….God!"

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One Week Later.

"Rose, I love you." "I love you too Jack." "Good. Will you please get off the couch?" "Why?" "Cause." "Cause why?" "Cause I fucking miss you!"

"I'm here." "But you're on the couch." "So? I like it here." "Rose, I want you to remember that I really do love you, and I say this for a reason."

"What?" "Get. Your. Ass. Off. The. Couch. Rose."