Kiz: Ladies, Gentlemen, muses and assorted other species.
Kaza: We welcome you back to this magnificent story by.
Beautyfly: US!!!
Kiz: ..and AD, but she's still locked away
AD: *from very dark room under even darker room behind very dark door* LET ME OUT!!
Kiz: You heard something?
Kaza: Yes, duh!
Kiz: Never mind! I'll let her out in the end of the chapter
Beautifly: *glares evilly at Kiz, but she just ignores it*
Chapter 07: The not so final battle
Disclaimer: IF we owned anything beside ourselves we'd be rich. We aren't
-----
Mandein: *walks on stage* Welcome to today's show
Kids: *cheer*
Mandein: Today we're going to do something VERY special. And JUST for YOU *points out to the kids*
Kids: YAYYYYYYIIIIIiiiiyiyiyiyiyiyiyiyiyiyi!!!!!
Svend (the scene, remember?): *transforms into a sandy ring*
Lene: *from back stage* Hey! There isn't room for the rest of us!
Svend: oops, sorry. *Transforms into a huge floor with a sandy ring in the middle*
Lene: *comes onto stage and pats Svend* good boy
Mandein: Today's special show is.
Lene: Magnificent, but besides that.
Madnein: Wrestling-theme!!!
Lene: But not just any wrestling-theme,
Mandein: SUMO WRESTLING!!!
Kids: FIGHTTFIGFBTFIGHTFIGHTIFHGITHFGIGHTIFHFIGBVTKJTBNGJTGKTBFGKGFKVG.SDHBF.G
Lene: err, yeah. But first! Our judge, SHARK!
Shark: *gets rolled on stage in fishtank*
Lene: She's mean
Mandein: Not green, but a
Both: FIGHT MACHINE!
Lene: She's stern, but unfair and losers go DIRECTLY into the fish-tank
Shark: *waves to VERY devoted audience*
Kids: GO SHARK GO SHARK
Madnein: But now.. THE CONTESTANTS!!!
Lene: Please welcome: JAK
Jak: *walks on stage - and he has gotten fat, VERY fat* Too *pants* much *pants* yummyfood!
Lene: Daxter!
Daxter: *The fat furball gets rolled on stage and stops as he hit the side of the fishtank* NOOOoooo, not THE SHARK
Mandein: *grabs Daxter* Come here. And Shrak, we'll feed you later
Shark: Aww, man! How about snacks? You know what that is, right?
Mandien: Please welcome: Karlos!
Karlos: *walks on stage and waves - yup, fat too*
Kids: BUUUUUH!
Fat Karlos: Are you saying that I'm FAT!?
Lene: I think they do and besides YOU STOLE MY LINE
Mandein: How come you get all the lines?
Lene: Because
Mandein: because, WHAT!?
Fat Daxter: Hey chill, nice honeys (A/N: The new word for the boys in my class, lol)
L&M: WHAT!?
Fat Daxter: *suddenly has a squicky voice* Err, nothin'
Lene: Ok, next competent: Kid #34
Kid #34: *walk on stage*
Lene: *whispers to Mandein* If he doesn't die in the first round I'm gonna kill someone and you're the nearest
Mandein: easy now, relax
Lene: *sigs* ok, ok. Next is the totally, extreeeeeeme! Sumo wrestling CHAMP
swCHAMP: *enters and as he walk everything shakes*
Lene: Welcome! And last, but somehow also LEAST: The NON-reviewing reader!
NONrr: *walks on stage*
Kids: BUUUUUUH!!!
Lene: SEE, they don't like you!
NONrr: sorry. *gets eaten by Shark*
Madnein: There, learn to review people!
Fat Daxter: Hey, aren't you being a little harsh now, lady?
Mandein: LADY?
Fat Jak: Dax, shut up and Mandein: On with it already?
Lene: Geez, since when did YOU become boss around here?
srCHAPM: Hey? When do we begin?
Mandein: Look, Jak, now you made him mad! *begins to cry*
Fat Jak: You're fooling no one
Mandein: Damn *snaps fingers*
Lene: First match: Daxter vs sumo wrestling CHAMP!
Fat Daxter: Why to you have to capitalize 'champ'?
Lene: Because, grasshopper. It's CHAMP!
Scene (aka Svend): Daxter, the FAT furball in one end of the large ring in the dry sand, and the s.w. world CHAMP in the other - just picture a furry, orange soccer ball with arms, legs and assorted other body parts and a VERY fat football player about to kick it.
*Bump* *bump* *splat*
*translation: The s.w.w.C. takes a step. Then he jumps. Not very elegantly of course. A few feet away he lands on the defenceless, but FAT animal formerly known as Daxter. Now known as Splatster. Ding. Saved (?) by the bell.
Mandein: And the winner is. Sumo Wrestling World CHAMP! Err, can we call you CJ?
swCHAMP: Sure, but why C J?
Lene: C for CHAMP and J because. Haven't you ever seen sitcoms?
CJ: Ok, I get it.
Mandein: Round 2: Karlos versus Kid #34
Svend: Blue demon, fat but strong. kid - approximately 12 years old. a little fat too.
Kid #34: Hey! I'm 13
Svend: Ok, ok 13 years. Gee, who wins?
*zap* *aaaaargh* *bwahahaha* *thud* *girlish scream* *eww*
*Translation: Karlos transforms into 'the blue demon'. Kid #34 screams at the HORRIBLE sight. Karlos laughs evilly, and then kicks Kid #34. He screams (girlishly). Karlos shows his disgust for girlish screams.
L&M: KILL EM!
Jak: Hey! What happened to not killing people?
Mandein: Err, you see, Jak
Lene: We didn't really kill him
Mandein: We just gave him what he deserved *nods furiously*
Lene: Hey, Jak guess what you're up next so we don't have time for your questions, GO
Svend: Jak vs CJ - Jak: even more to love now (A/N: Yeah sure, but THERE IS A LIMIT and Jak's FAR beyond that now) - And CJ, pal. Go get 'em tiger
*snarl* *snarl back* *buuh* *bump* *pant* *bump* *pant* *zap* *ooooh!* *thud* *loud synchronic cry* *zapety zap* *smooch* *thud* *double thud* *triumphant trumphet . sound*
*Translation: First, they snarl at each other. Then the audience buuh's at them for not fighting. One takes a step and is forced to pant over the extreme amount of effort to do so. The other does likewise. Then they try to stare each other down and it creates a lightling zap. The audience is FLAPPERGHASTED. Err, yeah, sure. Then CJ punches Jak and he falls to the ground. L&M cry out loud and use their mighty writers powers to revive him and make him much stronger. Afterwards, one of them kiss him. Who remains unknown. With his new-gained super powers Jak easily takes down CJ with punch and a (FAT-) Jean-Claude Van Damme-like circular kick with both legs. And a hero deserves a little music, right?
Mandein: Whew, that was tough!
Splatster: TOUGH!? You didn't even fight?
Mandein: Shut up, pancake
Splatster: Who're you calling pancake, err. Oh? Ooops, my bad *walks back- stage in pure shame*
Lene: And so. The finally. The big event, the
Shark: *cough* feeding time of the shark *cough*
Lene: No, just the finals
Mandein: Err, Lene - sje has a point. She's the jugde, right?
Lene: Yeah..?
Mandein: She hasn't been judging anything yet
Shark: *cough* Feedtheshark *cough*
Lene: Ok, ok. Let's get this fight started and you can eat the loser, now waddaya say?
Shark: Oh Jakkie-boi, I wanna nimble your bum
Mandein: -_-
Fat Jak: I'm not gonna lose to that bug sunnova *bleep*
Lene: Jak. PG
Fat Jak: Ok, ok. But I still won't lose.
Fat Karlos: You thing
Mandein: Hey, guys - If you want to fight, so it once the round starts, ok?
*bump* *bump* *snarl* *thud* *swooch* *bump* *tapety-bump* *thud* *iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii* *bang* *ouch!* *tap-taptapatapaptpaptpat - tagpap* *thud* *bump* *rrrrrrrrrr* *bump*
*Translation: Two steps and a snarl. Jak gives Karlos a fist in the face, but Karlos kicks Jak on the floor. Jak tries to get up, but falls and gets hit by Karlos. Shrak, the almighty judge whistles to warn the evil Karlos of him mean way of fighting, in the meantime, Jak kicks Karlos on the jaw. Jak gets up and runs. Karlos runs after him. After a bit of running, Jak hits Karlos and he falls on the floor. Jak rolls Karlos over the edge of the ring with a bump and he's out. LOSER!
Lene: Aww too bad Karlos, your fish-meat
Shark: Eww, I don't want to eat HIM. He's. ewww
Mandein: See there, Karlos? No one likes you
Fat Karlos: *snarls and goes back stage*
Lene: And the winner is.
Mandein: JAK!
Fat Jak: *holds up winner's cup* thank you, thank you.
Lene: Now, what do you want as your prize?
Fat Jak: Well, I'd like to be myself again - without all this.
Lene: Are you saying you don't like us?
Mandein: OMG he hates us!
L&M: *begin to cry*
Fat Jak: No, just make me back to my old self, please?
Lene: Oh, sorry. Just a little misunderstanding. *zaps Jak back to normal*
Jak: Yay, I'm ME again! Woohoo
Splatster: Hey, what about me?
Fat Karlos: And me?
Mandein: I feel pity for them. Just a little
Lene: Splatster deserves it, I think. Poor Jak has to carry around a huge and heavy pancake all the time.
Mandein: But karlos?
Lene: Hehe, I got an idea *zaps both back to normal*. Oh Sha-ark? Feeding time
Shark: Yummie.
-----
Kiz: Better stop now that it's still PG
Kaza: Yer sure it's still PG?
Kiz: Well, no, but still
Beautifly: Cut the cr*# and let AD out
Kiz: Are you threatening me?
Beutifly: Yes
Kiz: Ok *lets out AD* Welcome back
AD: It was scary and DARK down there!
Kiz: Uh, sorry. But did they like my little story?
AD: No *ties up Kiz and puts something in her mouth and puts her in a corner* My turn!
Kaza: That's a little harsh
AD: No
Beautifly: Geez, you guys are crazy. Better do the RR before anything gets out of hand.
Kaza: Or before Kiz starts to rhyme any more. Have you seen how the chapters have a rhyming-but-without-any-relation-to-the-content-name? Geez, talk about crazy
*Shark:
AD: Thanks for the review and I hope you like this chapter ^_^
Kaza: The Shark is the best!
Beauty: 0_0'
*Nobinoir:
AD: You want to be a cameo too? OK, next chapter!
Beauty: She is thinking!
Kaza: For the next chapter!
Kiz: hmmmm hm mh!
Beauty: What she jus said?
Kaza: I think, untie me!
AD: No, she said only until the next chapter!
Kiz: Mmmn nnm
*Translation: Review, now
Kaza: We welcome you back to this magnificent story by.
Beautyfly: US!!!
Kiz: ..and AD, but she's still locked away
AD: *from very dark room under even darker room behind very dark door* LET ME OUT!!
Kiz: You heard something?
Kaza: Yes, duh!
Kiz: Never mind! I'll let her out in the end of the chapter
Beautifly: *glares evilly at Kiz, but she just ignores it*
Chapter 07: The not so final battle
Disclaimer: IF we owned anything beside ourselves we'd be rich. We aren't
-----
Mandein: *walks on stage* Welcome to today's show
Kids: *cheer*
Mandein: Today we're going to do something VERY special. And JUST for YOU *points out to the kids*
Kids: YAYYYYYYIIIIIiiiiyiyiyiyiyiyiyiyiyiyi!!!!!
Svend (the scene, remember?): *transforms into a sandy ring*
Lene: *from back stage* Hey! There isn't room for the rest of us!
Svend: oops, sorry. *Transforms into a huge floor with a sandy ring in the middle*
Lene: *comes onto stage and pats Svend* good boy
Mandein: Today's special show is.
Lene: Magnificent, but besides that.
Madnein: Wrestling-theme!!!
Lene: But not just any wrestling-theme,
Mandein: SUMO WRESTLING!!!
Kids: FIGHTTFIGFBTFIGHTFIGHTIFHGITHFGIGHTIFHFIGBVTKJTBNGJTGKTBFGKGFKVG.SDHBF.G
Lene: err, yeah. But first! Our judge, SHARK!
Shark: *gets rolled on stage in fishtank*
Lene: She's mean
Mandein: Not green, but a
Both: FIGHT MACHINE!
Lene: She's stern, but unfair and losers go DIRECTLY into the fish-tank
Shark: *waves to VERY devoted audience*
Kids: GO SHARK GO SHARK
Madnein: But now.. THE CONTESTANTS!!!
Lene: Please welcome: JAK
Jak: *walks on stage - and he has gotten fat, VERY fat* Too *pants* much *pants* yummyfood!
Lene: Daxter!
Daxter: *The fat furball gets rolled on stage and stops as he hit the side of the fishtank* NOOOoooo, not THE SHARK
Mandein: *grabs Daxter* Come here. And Shrak, we'll feed you later
Shark: Aww, man! How about snacks? You know what that is, right?
Mandien: Please welcome: Karlos!
Karlos: *walks on stage and waves - yup, fat too*
Kids: BUUUUUH!
Fat Karlos: Are you saying that I'm FAT!?
Lene: I think they do and besides YOU STOLE MY LINE
Mandein: How come you get all the lines?
Lene: Because
Mandein: because, WHAT!?
Fat Daxter: Hey chill, nice honeys (A/N: The new word for the boys in my class, lol)
L&M: WHAT!?
Fat Daxter: *suddenly has a squicky voice* Err, nothin'
Lene: Ok, next competent: Kid #34
Kid #34: *walk on stage*
Lene: *whispers to Mandein* If he doesn't die in the first round I'm gonna kill someone and you're the nearest
Mandein: easy now, relax
Lene: *sigs* ok, ok. Next is the totally, extreeeeeeme! Sumo wrestling CHAMP
swCHAMP: *enters and as he walk everything shakes*
Lene: Welcome! And last, but somehow also LEAST: The NON-reviewing reader!
NONrr: *walks on stage*
Kids: BUUUUUUH!!!
Lene: SEE, they don't like you!
NONrr: sorry. *gets eaten by Shark*
Madnein: There, learn to review people!
Fat Daxter: Hey, aren't you being a little harsh now, lady?
Mandein: LADY?
Fat Jak: Dax, shut up and Mandein: On with it already?
Lene: Geez, since when did YOU become boss around here?
srCHAPM: Hey? When do we begin?
Mandein: Look, Jak, now you made him mad! *begins to cry*
Fat Jak: You're fooling no one
Mandein: Damn *snaps fingers*
Lene: First match: Daxter vs sumo wrestling CHAMP!
Fat Daxter: Why to you have to capitalize 'champ'?
Lene: Because, grasshopper. It's CHAMP!
Scene (aka Svend): Daxter, the FAT furball in one end of the large ring in the dry sand, and the s.w. world CHAMP in the other - just picture a furry, orange soccer ball with arms, legs and assorted other body parts and a VERY fat football player about to kick it.
*Bump* *bump* *splat*
*translation: The s.w.w.C. takes a step. Then he jumps. Not very elegantly of course. A few feet away he lands on the defenceless, but FAT animal formerly known as Daxter. Now known as Splatster. Ding. Saved (?) by the bell.
Mandein: And the winner is. Sumo Wrestling World CHAMP! Err, can we call you CJ?
swCHAMP: Sure, but why C J?
Lene: C for CHAMP and J because. Haven't you ever seen sitcoms?
CJ: Ok, I get it.
Mandein: Round 2: Karlos versus Kid #34
Svend: Blue demon, fat but strong. kid - approximately 12 years old. a little fat too.
Kid #34: Hey! I'm 13
Svend: Ok, ok 13 years. Gee, who wins?
*zap* *aaaaargh* *bwahahaha* *thud* *girlish scream* *eww*
*Translation: Karlos transforms into 'the blue demon'. Kid #34 screams at the HORRIBLE sight. Karlos laughs evilly, and then kicks Kid #34. He screams (girlishly). Karlos shows his disgust for girlish screams.
L&M: KILL EM!
Jak: Hey! What happened to not killing people?
Mandein: Err, you see, Jak
Lene: We didn't really kill him
Mandein: We just gave him what he deserved *nods furiously*
Lene: Hey, Jak guess what you're up next so we don't have time for your questions, GO
Svend: Jak vs CJ - Jak: even more to love now (A/N: Yeah sure, but THERE IS A LIMIT and Jak's FAR beyond that now) - And CJ, pal. Go get 'em tiger
*snarl* *snarl back* *buuh* *bump* *pant* *bump* *pant* *zap* *ooooh!* *thud* *loud synchronic cry* *zapety zap* *smooch* *thud* *double thud* *triumphant trumphet . sound*
*Translation: First, they snarl at each other. Then the audience buuh's at them for not fighting. One takes a step and is forced to pant over the extreme amount of effort to do so. The other does likewise. Then they try to stare each other down and it creates a lightling zap. The audience is FLAPPERGHASTED. Err, yeah, sure. Then CJ punches Jak and he falls to the ground. L&M cry out loud and use their mighty writers powers to revive him and make him much stronger. Afterwards, one of them kiss him. Who remains unknown. With his new-gained super powers Jak easily takes down CJ with punch and a (FAT-) Jean-Claude Van Damme-like circular kick with both legs. And a hero deserves a little music, right?
Mandein: Whew, that was tough!
Splatster: TOUGH!? You didn't even fight?
Mandein: Shut up, pancake
Splatster: Who're you calling pancake, err. Oh? Ooops, my bad *walks back- stage in pure shame*
Lene: And so. The finally. The big event, the
Shark: *cough* feeding time of the shark *cough*
Lene: No, just the finals
Mandein: Err, Lene - sje has a point. She's the jugde, right?
Lene: Yeah..?
Mandein: She hasn't been judging anything yet
Shark: *cough* Feedtheshark *cough*
Lene: Ok, ok. Let's get this fight started and you can eat the loser, now waddaya say?
Shark: Oh Jakkie-boi, I wanna nimble your bum
Mandein: -_-
Fat Jak: I'm not gonna lose to that bug sunnova *bleep*
Lene: Jak. PG
Fat Jak: Ok, ok. But I still won't lose.
Fat Karlos: You thing
Mandein: Hey, guys - If you want to fight, so it once the round starts, ok?
*bump* *bump* *snarl* *thud* *swooch* *bump* *tapety-bump* *thud* *iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii* *bang* *ouch!* *tap-taptapatapaptpaptpat - tagpap* *thud* *bump* *rrrrrrrrrr* *bump*
*Translation: Two steps and a snarl. Jak gives Karlos a fist in the face, but Karlos kicks Jak on the floor. Jak tries to get up, but falls and gets hit by Karlos. Shrak, the almighty judge whistles to warn the evil Karlos of him mean way of fighting, in the meantime, Jak kicks Karlos on the jaw. Jak gets up and runs. Karlos runs after him. After a bit of running, Jak hits Karlos and he falls on the floor. Jak rolls Karlos over the edge of the ring with a bump and he's out. LOSER!
Lene: Aww too bad Karlos, your fish-meat
Shark: Eww, I don't want to eat HIM. He's. ewww
Mandein: See there, Karlos? No one likes you
Fat Karlos: *snarls and goes back stage*
Lene: And the winner is.
Mandein: JAK!
Fat Jak: *holds up winner's cup* thank you, thank you.
Lene: Now, what do you want as your prize?
Fat Jak: Well, I'd like to be myself again - without all this.
Lene: Are you saying you don't like us?
Mandein: OMG he hates us!
L&M: *begin to cry*
Fat Jak: No, just make me back to my old self, please?
Lene: Oh, sorry. Just a little misunderstanding. *zaps Jak back to normal*
Jak: Yay, I'm ME again! Woohoo
Splatster: Hey, what about me?
Fat Karlos: And me?
Mandein: I feel pity for them. Just a little
Lene: Splatster deserves it, I think. Poor Jak has to carry around a huge and heavy pancake all the time.
Mandein: But karlos?
Lene: Hehe, I got an idea *zaps both back to normal*. Oh Sha-ark? Feeding time
Shark: Yummie.
-----
Kiz: Better stop now that it's still PG
Kaza: Yer sure it's still PG?
Kiz: Well, no, but still
Beautifly: Cut the cr*# and let AD out
Kiz: Are you threatening me?
Beutifly: Yes
Kiz: Ok *lets out AD* Welcome back
AD: It was scary and DARK down there!
Kiz: Uh, sorry. But did they like my little story?
AD: No *ties up Kiz and puts something in her mouth and puts her in a corner* My turn!
Kaza: That's a little harsh
AD: No
Beautifly: Geez, you guys are crazy. Better do the RR before anything gets out of hand.
Kaza: Or before Kiz starts to rhyme any more. Have you seen how the chapters have a rhyming-but-without-any-relation-to-the-content-name? Geez, talk about crazy
*Shark:
AD: Thanks for the review and I hope you like this chapter ^_^
Kaza: The Shark is the best!
Beauty: 0_0'
*Nobinoir:
AD: You want to be a cameo too? OK, next chapter!
Beauty: She is thinking!
Kaza: For the next chapter!
Kiz: hmmmm hm mh!
Beauty: What she jus said?
Kaza: I think, untie me!
AD: No, she said only until the next chapter!
Kiz: Mmmn nnm
*Translation: Review, now