Bursting Seams (Collapsing Reality)
"Kaworu!" I screamed.
"What…what on earth is he doing here?" uttered Asuka.
This, this was impossible! I killed him with practically my bare hands. I watched him die! How, how can he be…be here?
"When mankind came into being, who would have thought what this earth would have become."
I could already sense that something was wrong. I could see it in his fiery red eyes. This couldn't be Kaworu.
"What?" I replied hesitantly.
"I'm sure God", he glanced at the deteriorating Rei, "must be laughing with a thunderous roar. Such folly you Lilim have brought. Questions, answers, confusion, and understanding, its all rather amusing isn't it?"
"Kaworu? Wha—What are you saying?" My palms were sweating and my heart was racing quicker than it has ever before.
"Why does one need to evolve? To adapt of course… Now I want you to tell me, what exactly we had to adapt to? What was the purpose of this manipulated evolution? I believe I heard you state something about cleansing the earth?"
"No…you're not—"
"Kaworu? Of course I am! Look at me, I am one hundred percent Kaworu…I am you, I am Rei, I am an angel, I am human, I am the balance in this world. And if Rei is god then that of course means…"
"You can't be Kaworu…Kaworu LOVED ME!"
"Oh, but don't you see? I do love you…I love you with all my genetically engineered heart." He looked intently looked at Asuka. "Which you happened to have ripped out over…and over…and over again."
"The Eva series…was you—No. It can't be. But I saw you…I saw you DIE! If you were piloting the Eva series…then it was YOU who killed me!"
My heart was racing. I could see in front of me the tensions build. I could feel everything breaking down. How could Kaworu both be an angel and a pilot? A pilot of multiple Eva units! What was Asuka going to do to him? In all of this what is this pointless babble he keeps spitting out at Asuka and I. Unless it does have some sort of point…but what could he have meant? What did he mean when he said something about evolution? What the fuck is going on?!
Perhaps you never left her.
Her? What are you talking about? Who's saying that?
God has many tricks and is said to work in many mysterious ways.
What?
What makes reality real if you can't tell the difference between what is real and what is not? Now tell me what makes this so…real yet entirely fabricated?
What? Wait—this isn't right. How are you inside my head?
Do you know what temptation is?
Temptation?!
He was said to come in the form of a snake…
A snake…but…what is—
A knocking at the door
Get out. Go away! You don't belong here.
Do you want to become one with me?
I do, but you're acting so strange!
Do you want to become as one body, one mind?
Please don't do this…
Truth must be faced, although ignorance is bliss, ignorance is also without purpose. And without purpose, what is the point…
What is—
Happening? Nothing and yet everything.
I can't take this anymore. I want to free of this confusion.
Do you?
Yes.
But once you are free…what purpose will your life hold?
I—I…my life…will…
This, is your purpose Shinji. This is your reason for living. When the time comes you will know what to do. The Fate of Destruction is also the Joy of Rebirth.
"No man can fortell his fate"
-Antigone
* * *
Fate
We are the bringers of our own fates; we are the creators of out own destinies. Our "fates" for lack of a better word, are created from our motivations, our ambitions, and most importantly, our dreams and our nightmares. We create our own downfalls, we create our own uprisings, life is not predetermined, and there is no provided fate for everyone. Humans decide their own outcomes. Anything is possible, absolutely anything, the only thing that humans must learn is making the improbable, probable, and making life flow the way they choose too.
* * *
"Kaworu!" I screamed.
"What…what on earth is he doing here?" uttered Asuka.
This, this was impossible! I killed him with practically my bare hands. I watched him die! How, how can he be…be here?
"When mankind came into being, who would have thought what this earth would have become."
I could already sense that something was wrong. I could see it in his fiery red eyes. This couldn't be Kaworu.
"What?" I replied hesitantly.
"I'm sure God", he glanced at the deteriorating Rei, "must be laughing with a thunderous roar. Such folly you Lilim have brought. Questions, answers, confusion, and understanding, its all rather amusing isn't it?"
"Kaworu? Wha—What are you saying?" My palms were sweating and my heart was racing quicker than it has ever before.
"Why does one need to evolve? To adapt of course… Now I want you to tell me, what exactly we had to adapt to? What was the purpose of this manipulated evolution? I believe I heard you state something about cleansing the earth?"
"No…you're not—"
"Kaworu? Of course I am! Look at me, I am one hundred percent Kaworu…I am you, I am Rei, I am an angel, I am human, I am the balance in this world. And if Rei is god then that of course means…"
"You can't be Kaworu…Kaworu LOVED ME!"
"Oh, but don't you see? I do love you…I love you with all my genetically engineered heart." He looked intently looked at Asuka. "Which you happened to have ripped out over…and over…and over again."
"The Eva series…was you—No. It can't be. But I saw you…I saw you DIE! If you were piloting the Eva series…then it was YOU who killed me!"
My heart was racing. I could see in front of me the tensions build. I could feel everything breaking down. How could Kaworu both be an angel and a pilot? A pilot of multiple Eva units! What was Asuka going to do to him? In all of this what is this pointless babble he keeps spitting out at Asuka and I. Unless it does have some sort of point…but what could he have meant? What did he mean when he said something about evolution? What the fuck is going on?!
Perhaps you never left her.
Her? What are you talking about? Who's saying that?
God has many tricks and is said to work in many mysterious ways.
What?
What makes reality real if you can't tell the difference between what is real and what is not? Now tell me what makes this so…real yet entirely fabricated?
What? Wait—this isn't right. How are you inside my head?
Do you know what temptation is?
Temptation?!
He was said to come in the form of a snake…
A snake…but…what is—
A knocking at the door
Get out. Go away! You don't belong here.
Do you want to become one with me?
I do, but you're acting so strange!
Do you want to become as one body, one mind?
Please don't do this…
Truth must be faced, although ignorance is bliss, ignorance is also without purpose. And without purpose, what is the point…
What is—
Happening? Nothing and yet everything.
I can't take this anymore. I want to free of this confusion.
Do you?
Yes.
But once you are free…what purpose will your life hold?
I—I…my life…will…
This, is your purpose Shinji. This is your reason for living. When the time comes you will know what to do. The Fate of Destruction is also the Joy of Rebirth.
"No man can fortell his fate"
-Antigone
* * *
Fate
We are the bringers of our own fates; we are the creators of out own destinies. Our "fates" for lack of a better word, are created from our motivations, our ambitions, and most importantly, our dreams and our nightmares. We create our own downfalls, we create our own uprisings, life is not predetermined, and there is no provided fate for everyone. Humans decide their own outcomes. Anything is possible, absolutely anything, the only thing that humans must learn is making the improbable, probable, and making life flow the way they choose too.
* * *