At first I didn't take this fic too seriously, but once I reached the end, I knew this was going to be my new baby. The first chapter sucks, really bad and doesn't give credit to this chapter. I hope you can feel the intensity of the ending, I wanted to try a different path with this one.
I have just started into the genre *at the end* and I hope if you have some constructive pointers I could use, please share them.
Because I have read some amazing Draco fics and I guess you could say I'm trying to follow what they have. But all my writing and ideas are original and by no means stolen or copied.
I own nothing of course…sure I would like to, but hey, what are ya gonna do?
The castle seemed so empty as Draco burst through the doors, as if someone was waiting on the other side to hear it. But when he finally threw them shut behind him, it echoed throughout the castle corridors, attracting some attention from nearby house elves. He pulled back the sleeve of his robe and glanced down at the time, then examined the surrounding corridors.
" Merlin, where are they?" Draco airily whispered to himself.
Darting his eyes to each corridor, Draco, knowing the students were all in the Great Hall, laid himself down. Each movement caused a groan of agony until he laid flat upon the cold stone. He slowly pulled his arms behind his head, resting his head on his wrists, parting his legs as wide as they would go, easing the pain in his back. His breathing slowed and his eyelids fell, he wasn't asleep, just painless.
" I know he said 9..." the deep hollow voice of one of Draco's goons echoed from a distant corridor.
" No he said 9:30," the other argued back.
"You're both wrong," Draco yelled, almost biting off the tip of his tongue, from the pain he endured from standing up so smoothly, just as Crabbe and Goyle entered from the hall, " I said 9:15... And that was a half hour ago you dimwits."
He strutted between them, knocking both of their bellies. He rhythmically clicked up the stairs, his robes flowing behind him. Crabbe and Goyle looked at each other, confused on what exactly Draco wanted them to do.
"Does he…" Crabbe whispered, looking at the ascending boy from the corner of his eye, "want us…to…"
" Follow me you idiots," Draco unconsciously finished Crabbe's thought taking no time to stop. Crabbe and Goyle rushed like bumbling giants to catch up with Draco who was already at the top.
"Good--to see---you---Draco," Goyle heaved breathlessly
"Yes--good---to---see------," Crabbe stopped to cough.
Draco squinted his eyes, leaning slightly closer as if he really was waiting for what Crabbe had to say, but he wasn't.
" Oh save it ," Draco walked off towards the Slytherin tower, breathing abnormally heavy from the effort it took to remain in his trademark arrogant posture.
" Any new girls?" he asked as he walked swiftly, now followed by his goons.
"Er…yea there is this one.."
"Is she hot?" Draco interrupted, not looking behind him
"Well, yea except…"
"Good, what's her name?"
"Um…Penny, but…" Goyle tried to finish, but Draco understood exactly what he meant, after turning the corner by the second floor bathrooms.
" A Gryffindor?" Draco sneered in the direction of Penny who was talking with some other 7th years, unaware Draco was there.
"Er…yea that's what I was trying to…" Goyle stepped forward in defense.
"A Gryffindor?" Draco repeated, like he had to convince himself it was true.
But what made the whole situation worse was the Potter boy, who now was 17, and could spot a good looking girl just as fast as Draco, had spotted her first.
" Yea," Crabbe groaned, realizing the look on Draco's face changed when he spotted Harry, " Potter's trying to pick up the new girl, weird and sick, all at the same time."
" Potter," Draco whispered through angrily clenched teeth. "That git thinks he can have any girl just cause' he's "The Boy Who Lived"," Draco added more loudly, creating the quotations with loose fingers.
" Heh yea, he'll be " The Boy Who Died" when you get through with him, right Draco?" Goyle grunted, playfully knocking Draco on the side of his arm.
Draco slowly turned around, completely facing them, "Don't talk anymore, for Merlin's sake, you're just making yourself seem as stupid as Potter," shutting his eyes in frustration, he turned back around.
Draco began walking ever so slowly towards Penny and Harry, who were making flirtatious conversation and body language. His lip curled in an angry smirk, when he saw Harry look just to the right of Penny, obviously noticing him.
Penny, who's back was facing Draco, turned around when she saw Harry's eyes were distracted behind her. Her golden brown hair twirled around her, falling back into perfect place as she turned her body.
Draco immediately met her eyes and she smiled, revealing her innocent dimples on either side of her face. He held a stiff hand to her, like the one he had given Harry when they had first met.
" Draco Malfoy, 7th year Slytherin," Draco softened his smirk to more of a pleasant grin.
The girl took his hand in a stern grip, "Penny Hellmen, 7th year Gryffindor."
Draco didn't notice that there was sort of a friendly mocking in her voice, sounding like Draco's introduction. She smiled and giggled, turning to Harry, who seemed to be slightly shocked that she had tried that so early on in meeting Draco. But he quickly turned into a soft chuckle.
" This is Crabbe, and Goyle," Draco nodded the back of his head to each of the hovering guys behind him.
" Nice to meet you Crabbe…and Goyle," she took her time to acknowledge each with a friendly wink.
" Malfoy," Harry tried to sound as friendly as he could toward his enemy, " Me and Penny were having a conversation before…"
" I believe it's said ' Penny and I '… Potter was never good at speaking properly," Draco turned to Penny.
Harry shot a very threatening glance at Draco from behind Penny's back. She turned around, taking his sleeve and pulling him forward, to where she and him stood side by side.
" Oh, that's alright," she laughed cheerily, "Harry's been telling me that he is quite the Quidditch player, seeker I believe…right Harry?"
A triumphant grin parted Harry's lips, noticing Draco's face deflating from arrogance to anger.
" That's right Penny," he grinned mockingly at Draco, " I have won the house cup."
Penny patted Harry's back a couple of times, seeming very impressed. Draco looked positively disgusted with his potential girl touching Harry.
" Oh, and you were telling me about your scar, now that's pretty cool!" Penny praised Harry with light touch of his shoulder.
Draco became increasingly angry at Harry's pompous expression, which he couldn't help but tease Draco with.
"Yea, it was a horrible night…I…I try not to remember it," Harry turned away covering his face with his hands.
Draco clenched his teeth, breathing the words he wanted so badly to call Harry.
'Pathetic git,' Draco thought to himself angrily. ' Has to sink so low to pull the sympathy card.'
Penny immediately went over putting her arm around the hunched over Harry, who sobbed into his hands.
" Oh now, it's going to be ok…shh," she comforted , stroking his back.
Harry turned his face to Draco, pulling his hands away just to reveal his Draco-like sneer. Harry pulled his face back towards Penny, sobbing pathetically.
Draco's knuckles whitened as he dug his fingers into his palms, clenching his anger. He didn't show a sign of defeat. His body held so tight, he almost screamed from the pain searing through his back.
Penny escorted Harry back towards the direction of the Gryffindor commons, continuing her soft, comforting words.
" Nice to meet you Draco!," she called behind her.
" Yea, whatever." Draco grunted, sharply turning, walking angrily to the Slytherin commons.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Ron laughed, " so what did he look like when you did that?"
Harry stood up in his pajamas, attempting an overdone whimpering Draco, complete with chihuahua-like shaking.
Ron fell back into his bed with laughter, kicking the air.
"He was so pathetic, I almost felt sorry for him you know?"
"You did?" Ron said , quite puzzled.
Harry pretended to think about it, stroking his chin.
"…NO!" Harry yelled, immediately breaking out in laughter. Ron howled also, rolling on the bed like a child.
The two eventually laughed themselves under the covers of their beds (separate beds, sheesh) , turning the light off somehow in that process.
"So," Ron seemed to think out loud, "Penny huh?"
"Yea," Harry sighed.
" You're so lucky, cause' she is so hot."
" Merlin yea!" Harry hooted.
"I'd do her," Ron said casually, as many older boys would do.
"Ron!" Harry turned over, facing Ron's bed in the dark, " you keep your bloody hands off , she's my hottie!"
Harry could here Ron shift under the crisp covers, panting with laughter.
"You know, I was just joshin' ya' mate, I would never do that…unless you screw it up with her, then I would do her."
" You're such a wanker Ron," Harry mumbled pulling his sheets over his head, falling right to sleep.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
" Harry fucking Potter…damn I hate that git!" Draco slammed his fist against the wall. Inside, the anger hurt him physically , but he didn't show it on the outside.
" Takes whoever the fuck he wants…god I just want to---to…" Draco rung his hands as if he was choking Harry right there.
Crabbe and Goyle sat on their trunks, having nothing else to do but watch Draco tear their new dorm apart with anger.
" Damn, she is so hot!" Goyle belted out, stupidly, of course.
" Yea if I had her, man I would take her so ha…" Crabbe trailed off, once Draco looked as if he were about to kill him.
The fury within Draco shot through every part of his body. He shook, despite the agony. Biting down so hard, he felt one of his molars crack and slice a good gash into his tongue. But that pain didn't matter to him, no pain he inflicted upon himself made any difference. His father's pain…Harry's pain, that made him cringe. But at least with Harry, he could fight back.
" You fucking shut up!" Draco screamed with blood dripping down his chin.
Crabbe fell back onto his bed as Draco stormed dangerously close.
" I swear to god, ONE more time and I'll take my switch and fucking cut your throat!"
Goyle felt Draco's threat from across the room, and he began gasping from fear. Crabbe couldn't move, Draco was right over his face, breathing hard and sharp. Blood slowly dripped from Draco's mouth onto the bed and Crabbe's quivering body.
Draco didn't move, neither did Crabbe, literally frozen with terror. His rage would get bad, not usually towards them. And his rage, his rage had never come to death threats, threats that were clearly so serious.
He didn't stop his murderous gaze at Crabbe.
The blood bubbled from his quick breaths through clenched teeth.
His hair fell into his face, the tips soaking the blood from the corners of his mouth..
He looked nothing short of psychotic.
With a final sharp breath, Draco spit the accumulating blood onto Crabbe's face. Crabbe didn't even so much as flinch until Draco threw himself upwards, grunting like a madman.
He seemed to rock now, instead of a simple shake. His eyes crept menacingly to each corner of the room, his stained robes swishing as he rocked.
…At last, his breathing stopped, he stood up straight. He walked normally over to his bed, as if nothing had happened. Crabbe and Goyle, like scared children, threw themselves into bed. They covered their eyes with the pillows, wanting to block out Draco.
Everything was quiet, like the calm before the storm…quiet.
Just the shuffle of Draco's hobble parted the silence, slow …then, it stopped.
Crabbe's and Goyle's frightened pants came muffled through their pillows.
…Then, with all the passion, all the strength Draco had left, he released with the most horrible, blood curtailing scream that had ever echoed throughout the school.
He threw his leg violently back, thrusting it forward into the trunk by his bed, breaking its thick plastic surface. Crabbe and Goyle shuttered with a wince, not being able to see, they only heard the scream, then the crack of plastic and bone.
Draco heaved three more breaths, then fell with only the waft of winds echoing from his robes as he slammed to the ground, unconscious.
…..his blood pooled, soaking his beautiful blonde hair, staining his deathly-pale face.
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I tried to go for the cliff hanger for the end…
but I hope you found it worth your time…
please review…
---quin and pippin (lol it rhymes so it MUST be true love *sigh*)
listen and love 'steward of gondor'