Cristian lay back in the chair surprised at how comfortable it was. After awhile
he closed his eyes and listened to Natalie's even breathing, he could tell she
was asleep and he was glad. The last week had been Hell for her and he wished he
could spare her that. For some reason he wanted to protect this woman, keep her
safe, make her happy. He opened his eyes and looked towards where she slept. The
street light outside of the window softly illuminated the bed and he could see
her face, she looked so innocent, so beautiful, he wanted to capture her in that
moment. She made him want to paint, something he hadn't felt for a long time
now. He suddenly realized he was falling in love with her. This news took him by
surprise and he could only sit there to stunned to think, but thoughts came
anyway. When had it happened? What about Jen? He couldn't be in love with
someone else, yet he was. He guiltily looked away, he should be thinking of a
way to salvage his and Jen's relationship but that was far from his mind and he
felt even guiltier because he didn't want to fix the relationship, what he had
with Jen was nothing compared to how he felt when he was with Natalie and he
wasn't sure he could walk away from Natalie to be with Jen. He looked back at
her, what he had with her was an undeniable passion, a roaring fire that burned
between them, it wasn't like that with Jen, not anymore. He slowly got up and
walked to the bed where she slept, he looked at her and saw her with eyes he
recognized the many things he loved about her, her feistiness, her personality,
the way she tried to hide behind a hard exterior but inside she was sweet and
vulnerable. He loved the softness of her skin, the smell of her hair, her
beautiful lips, her smile, her eyes.
He touched her cheek and in her sleep her hand covered his. "Don't leave me,
Cristian," she mumbled in her sleep. "I love you."
Natalie was drifting on the edge of sleep. She could see Cristian kissing her
and she wanted to be caught in that moment for eternity, no matter what happened
she knew he would never leave her, and that gave her a feeling she had never had
for a person, total trust. She'd never had someone believe in her the way that
he did and she cherished that, it was a gift and she never wanted to give it up.
He gave her light when there was only darkness, joy, when despair had conquered
her life, he gave her love when no one else did. Love. Was it possible that he
loved her, she realized that she already loved him, it was so easy to give
herself to him and know that he wouldn't hurt her. She loved him and she knew
that she could never feel that way about anyone else, but she was scared, did he
love her? Was she just a friend to him? She never wanted him to leave her but
experience told her that love always left, it never lasted, but she wanted it to
last so badly.
Cristian stopped, his breath catching in his throat, had he really heard her
right? She was still holding onto his hand and he found it impossible to leave
so he lay down beside her and fell asleep, still holding her hand and he felt
like he belonged there.
Natalie snuggled deeper into the arms that were wrapped around her and sighed in
pleasure as his hold on her tightened. Suddenly it occurred to her that she'd
fallen asleep alone. She didn't have to turn around to know who it was, though
her heart sped up. She didn't want to leave the comfort of his arms so she just
laid there. She started to think about that one time, in his apartment when Jen
had went to Al and he'd needed somebody and they'd almost had sex, that had been
full of fire and hurt and need. But the way he held her now was different, it
was tender and gentle and it meant a lot to her.
She felt him move and yawn and she wondered if he was awake, if he knew she was.
Natalie laid still and he started to gently stroke her cheek and she was almost
lulled back into sleep. "That feels nice," she said startling him and he pulled
away.
"I didn't know you were awake," he said sitting up.
"That's okay, thanks for staying with me last night, I needed that," she said
looking into his beautiful brown eyes.
"You're welcome," he said looking away. "Do you mind if I use the shower?" he
asked getting out of the bed.
"No, go ahead, I'll order breakfast," she said also getting up.
She wondered if she'd done something wrong, for some reason he seemed distant,
he was probably thinking about Jen, she told herself ignoring the pain she felt
when thinking about him and Jen together. She went to the phone and ordered
breakfast. She put her hair into a loose ponytail and then went to the window
and looked out into the bright summer morning, it was going to be a beautiful
day.
She could still feel Cristian's hand on her cheek. He made her feel safe and she
needed that so much, especially now, but he was her friend and that meant more
to her than anything in the world.
Finally breakfast came and was laid out on the table.
Cristian came out of the bathroom and Natalie thought he looked handsome with
the sunlight glinting off of his wet hair. He sat down and she sat down next to
him.
Natalie strawberries and whipped cream on top of her pancakes and wondered why
there was tension in the air that hadn't been there last night and then she
remembered the admission she'd made to herself the moment before she drifted
into deep sleep. She loved him. This new realization made her stop and she
couldn't believe how blind she'd been, she'd known she felt something for him
but she hadn't known it was this real...and scary. A part of her wanted to tell
him but another part reminded her if she did, things would never be the same
again, but then that other part wanted to know if he felt the same way. She
glanced up at him and he was staring at her with a smile on his face and she had
to admit that his smile was contagious.
"What? Why are you looking at me like that?"
"You have a little…right here…," he said wiping something from the corner of her
mouth. His hand traveled to her cheek and she covered his hand with hers,
leaning into the caress and closing her eyes. She felt his lips on hers and she
had to touch his face to make sure it was real.
Cristian couldn't help himself as his lips moved against hers; it felt so right,
so natural. He'd never felt this way before, he felt like he could kiss her
forever and never get tired of it. He buried his hands in her mass of silky red
hair, yearning for more. They fumbled towards the bed, continuing to kiss, his
lips traveling down her neck and back to her lips. The kisses became slower and
more gentle and finally Natalie looked into his eyes hoping she wouldn't see
regret or guilt. She finally had her answer, all she saw was love.
THE END
