Ryan walked into the kitchen half heartedly. It's not that he didn't want
to meet Sandy's family; he really did because if they were anything like
Sandy they would be amazing. But he was expecting them in smaller, more
controlled doses, not just dumped on him.
Kirsten looked up from her morning paper and smiled. "Hi Ryan. Excited about today?"
"Yeah." Ryan replied with a hint of sarcasm in there.
"We're sorry about not telling you, we should have. It's just that we usually don't tell Seth about their visits, and we kind of forgot that you haven't really met them." Kirsten explained closing the paper and resting her head in her hands.
Ryan shrugged. "It's ok. I don't want to mess up tradition."
Kirsten shook her head. "You aren't, we just have to change it slightly to accomidate you." She grabbed her cup of coffee and grinned. "You're going to love them. I can tell you and Victoria will have a lot in common."
The sound of the door bell interrupted Ryan's reply and Seth's yells down the stairs filled the house with excitement to the brim.
"They're HERE!!!!"
Kirsten jumped from her chair. "Oh no! Their early!" She grabbed Ryan's wrist and began to pull him into the grand foyer. "Come on! Everyone has to be in the foyer when they enter!"
Seth whipped open the door with a grin. "Granny Cohen! Grandpa Cohen! Lucy and Laura! You made it!"
Ryan stood back and smiled as a little old woman jumped to reach Seth's neck kissing him on the cheek. "Oh! My baby! Seth dearest, you've grown since I last saw you!"
Grandpa Cohen was the next to enter, a tall man, with curly dark hair and streaks of grey through it. An older Sandy, what Ryan would have guessed. "Seth." He said clapping his hand onto Seth's shoulder and moving past him quickly to squeeze Kirsten. "Kirsten! I'm glad to see you haven't killed my grandson with your cooking."
It was the first time Ryan had actually seen Kirsten laugh about her cooking. All of the words that were jokes were actually laughed about and not taken offence. They were jokes and nothing more.
Granny Cohen's blue eyes, hidden behind glasses fell onto Ryan. "Ah. . ." She smiled making her way to him and pinching his arm. "Nice and strong." Ryan quickly rubbed the spot and smiled. "Here." She said putting the keys into his hand. "Empty the car and park it in the driveway and you'll get a nice tip."
The smile dropped off Ryan's face, crashing to the ground.
"OH!" Kirsten yelped maneuvering out of Grandpa Cohen's hug. She grabbed the keys out of Ryan's hand and smiled. "Ryan isn't the help. Ryan is our new son. Remember Granny?"
Granny blushed and smiled. "Oh, I'm sorry dear boy!" She apologized reaching up and patting his cheek. "How polite! And handsome too! What a sweet boy!"
Ryan couldn't help but blush. He remembered in Chino, when elderly women crossed his path they would scurry out of his way. But this one was so nice; she would never use pepper spray. "Um. . . Thanks."
Grandpa Cohen patted his wife shoulder. "Ok, Rosie, I think you're embarrassing him. Come along, it's been a long trip. How about we take a nap?"
Ryan smiled as the elderly couple left the room with Kirsten showing them the way to their room and a pair of twins walked in.
"Seth!" They both screeched.
Seth gave them both a squeeze and smiled.
One smiled at him. "Do we get to stay in the pool house like last time?"
The other nodded and smiled the same smile with dimples. "Yeah! Are you going to bring Charlene?"
Ryan laughed. "Who's Charlene?"
Seth turned red and shook his head at the twins. "His name is Captain Oats. I thought we went over this last time. His name is not Charlene and never will be."
The first one shook her head. "You said we could call her whatever we wanted to. We called her Charlene."
Seth sighed knowing he was not going to win this battle. "Well, seeing Captain Oats is a guy, I didn't think Charlene was a good name for him. Anyways we can't stay in the pool house. Ryan lives there."
The smiles on the twin's faces were quickly replaced by matching scowls. "Who is Ryan?"
Seth smiled. "Ryan is my new brother." He pointed at Ryan and smiled. "He is Ryan."
The twin's scowls were replaced my smirks. "Oh." They echoed each other.
"Seth? Could you go get Charlene and some board games?" One of them asked, batting her eyelashes.
"Yeah, sure Lucy." Seth said walking up the stairs towards his room.
As Seth left the room the twins closed in on Ryan.
"Hi Ryan." They echoed each other.
Ryan managed out a weak hi, staring at the evil looking smirks that crept across their faces.
"You took our spot. The pool house is where Seth and us would hang out and you stole it." The girl on the right whispered, curling her dark curly hair behind her ear.
"Yeah. You stole Seth away from us." The girl on the left agreed, tossing her dark ponytail over her shoulder and scowling.
The girl on the right blinked her dark brown eyes. "So you better sleep with one eye open tonight Ryan."
"Because, you don't belong here." The girl on the left finished.
Seth obliviously thumped down the stairs with a pile of boxes in his arms. "Hey you two; you meeting Ryan?"
They nodded turned around to face Ryan again and gave him a squeeze around the neck.
"Sweet." One of the girls whispered in his ear.
"Dreams." They other finished letting got of his neck and following Seth into the den with a wink.
Ryan sighed with relief.
"Was I just threatened by a pair of preteens?"
Ryan shook his head and followed the group into the den and quickly sat on the couch watching the twins eagerly set up the board game in front of him and Seth.
"So, what are you playing?" He asked awkwardly to his new cousins.
One of the girls smiled at him. "13 Dead End Drive. It's our favourite."
Her sister picked up one of the game pieces and smiled. "Because one minute, you're have the blond boy, who helps around the house," she sat the piece under the chandelier and pushed a button making the plastic toy fall upon the piece, "and next, he's dead."
Ryan swallowed nervously. "Oh. Well that sounds fun." He got up off the couch. "I think I better call Marissa."
"Lucy!" Ryan guessed Laura whispered to her sister. "It's Marissa!"
"You two know Marissa?" Ryan smiled, hoping like hell they liked his girlfriend.
Lucy rolled her eyes at him. "Of course we know Marissa. She went on a pity date with Seth last time we came here."
Ryan shot a look at Seth.
"Hey! That was not a pity date!" Seth said forcefully to his cousins. "The Coopers came along to the restaurant and we talked because we go to the same school."
Ryan nodded and backed out of the den of doom. His only hope was Marissa, to save him from the murderous twins that were going to be staying in the same house as him. He hoped he would be luckier than Cousin Alec, and not have his finger bitten.
Before he reached the phone the doorbell interrupted his thoughts again and quickly made his way to the foyer before Seth could yell. . .
"They're HERE!!!!"
Ryan laughed at Seth's excitement and eyed the twins that stood in the doorway as Seth whipped open the door again with a larger grin than before.
"Seth! Move out of my way!" A pretty girl said pushing Seth's chest and stomping into the house.
"Victoria Walsh! You get back here right now!" An angry voice from the driveway screamed.
Seth bit his lip and took a few steps away from Victoria. "Another fight with your mother?"
She rolled her eyes. "What do you think? She doesn't even want to trust me driving! Vicky, you're going too slow, now too fast, signal here, you missed the turn! Aw! Horseshit!" The girl mocked, yelling at the end.
A woman who looked much like Victoria trudged into the house. "Victoria! Watch your language! Little Seth does not need to hear that!"
The girl turned around angrily. "Mother! Look at Seth! He's my age! I'm sure he's heard worse. Seth; tell her!"
"I'm sure his mother protects him from such foul things. He probably does everything his mother says. Tell her Seth!" Victoria's mother yelled back grabbing onto Seth's arm, while Victoria grabbed onto the other.
"Uh. . . ." Seth managed to mumble. "Ryan, help."
Both the women looked confused and stared up at Seth. "Who's Ryan?" They asked, much to their displeasure.
"I'm Ryan." He said as he stepped forward biting his lip.
The mother rolled her eyes. "Oh, the freeloader."
Victoria scowled. "Oh mother! You are so rude! He is standing right in front of you! He is not a freeloader! Seth told me he has his own job and everything. This boy is your cousin."
Seth swallowed nervously. "Ryan, this is our cousin Sandra, and our second cousin Vickie." He motioned to them once he wriggled his arms free.
Sandra nodded. "That's nice." She walked out of the room with her nose in the air towards the kitchen.
Vickie sighed and rolled her eyes. "Hi Ryan; nice to meet you. Sorry about my mom. She can be a bitch."
"I HEARD THAT!" Sandra yelled from the kitchen.
Vickie rolled her eyes again. "And she has ears like a bat. Thank God she's leaving tomorrow. I get to go home with Granny and Grampie." She smiled. "I'm also glad I don't have to stay in the same room with her like last time."
Seth nodded. "I had no clue an egg beater could be used that way."
"Remember the look on her face after the third hour of trying to get it out of her hair?" Vickie giggled.
Seth laughed. "It gave the twins nightmares for days!"
"VICKIE! IT YOU'RE TELLING THE EGG BEATER STORY. . ."
Vickie laughed as she nudged Ryan. "See, I told you she had ears like a bat."
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A/N: Yuppers! This is supposed to be more of a funny than serious fan fiction. Yeah, I got the idea for this one from my family on my dad's side because they can be really crazy; although no one is as bitchy and blood thirsty as Sandra and the twins. Anyways, I hope this was as good as the first chapter!
REVIEW!!
~Toodles!
Kirsten looked up from her morning paper and smiled. "Hi Ryan. Excited about today?"
"Yeah." Ryan replied with a hint of sarcasm in there.
"We're sorry about not telling you, we should have. It's just that we usually don't tell Seth about their visits, and we kind of forgot that you haven't really met them." Kirsten explained closing the paper and resting her head in her hands.
Ryan shrugged. "It's ok. I don't want to mess up tradition."
Kirsten shook her head. "You aren't, we just have to change it slightly to accomidate you." She grabbed her cup of coffee and grinned. "You're going to love them. I can tell you and Victoria will have a lot in common."
The sound of the door bell interrupted Ryan's reply and Seth's yells down the stairs filled the house with excitement to the brim.
"They're HERE!!!!"
Kirsten jumped from her chair. "Oh no! Their early!" She grabbed Ryan's wrist and began to pull him into the grand foyer. "Come on! Everyone has to be in the foyer when they enter!"
Seth whipped open the door with a grin. "Granny Cohen! Grandpa Cohen! Lucy and Laura! You made it!"
Ryan stood back and smiled as a little old woman jumped to reach Seth's neck kissing him on the cheek. "Oh! My baby! Seth dearest, you've grown since I last saw you!"
Grandpa Cohen was the next to enter, a tall man, with curly dark hair and streaks of grey through it. An older Sandy, what Ryan would have guessed. "Seth." He said clapping his hand onto Seth's shoulder and moving past him quickly to squeeze Kirsten. "Kirsten! I'm glad to see you haven't killed my grandson with your cooking."
It was the first time Ryan had actually seen Kirsten laugh about her cooking. All of the words that were jokes were actually laughed about and not taken offence. They were jokes and nothing more.
Granny Cohen's blue eyes, hidden behind glasses fell onto Ryan. "Ah. . ." She smiled making her way to him and pinching his arm. "Nice and strong." Ryan quickly rubbed the spot and smiled. "Here." She said putting the keys into his hand. "Empty the car and park it in the driveway and you'll get a nice tip."
The smile dropped off Ryan's face, crashing to the ground.
"OH!" Kirsten yelped maneuvering out of Grandpa Cohen's hug. She grabbed the keys out of Ryan's hand and smiled. "Ryan isn't the help. Ryan is our new son. Remember Granny?"
Granny blushed and smiled. "Oh, I'm sorry dear boy!" She apologized reaching up and patting his cheek. "How polite! And handsome too! What a sweet boy!"
Ryan couldn't help but blush. He remembered in Chino, when elderly women crossed his path they would scurry out of his way. But this one was so nice; she would never use pepper spray. "Um. . . Thanks."
Grandpa Cohen patted his wife shoulder. "Ok, Rosie, I think you're embarrassing him. Come along, it's been a long trip. How about we take a nap?"
Ryan smiled as the elderly couple left the room with Kirsten showing them the way to their room and a pair of twins walked in.
"Seth!" They both screeched.
Seth gave them both a squeeze and smiled.
One smiled at him. "Do we get to stay in the pool house like last time?"
The other nodded and smiled the same smile with dimples. "Yeah! Are you going to bring Charlene?"
Ryan laughed. "Who's Charlene?"
Seth turned red and shook his head at the twins. "His name is Captain Oats. I thought we went over this last time. His name is not Charlene and never will be."
The first one shook her head. "You said we could call her whatever we wanted to. We called her Charlene."
Seth sighed knowing he was not going to win this battle. "Well, seeing Captain Oats is a guy, I didn't think Charlene was a good name for him. Anyways we can't stay in the pool house. Ryan lives there."
The smiles on the twin's faces were quickly replaced by matching scowls. "Who is Ryan?"
Seth smiled. "Ryan is my new brother." He pointed at Ryan and smiled. "He is Ryan."
The twin's scowls were replaced my smirks. "Oh." They echoed each other.
"Seth? Could you go get Charlene and some board games?" One of them asked, batting her eyelashes.
"Yeah, sure Lucy." Seth said walking up the stairs towards his room.
As Seth left the room the twins closed in on Ryan.
"Hi Ryan." They echoed each other.
Ryan managed out a weak hi, staring at the evil looking smirks that crept across their faces.
"You took our spot. The pool house is where Seth and us would hang out and you stole it." The girl on the right whispered, curling her dark curly hair behind her ear.
"Yeah. You stole Seth away from us." The girl on the left agreed, tossing her dark ponytail over her shoulder and scowling.
The girl on the right blinked her dark brown eyes. "So you better sleep with one eye open tonight Ryan."
"Because, you don't belong here." The girl on the left finished.
Seth obliviously thumped down the stairs with a pile of boxes in his arms. "Hey you two; you meeting Ryan?"
They nodded turned around to face Ryan again and gave him a squeeze around the neck.
"Sweet." One of the girls whispered in his ear.
"Dreams." They other finished letting got of his neck and following Seth into the den with a wink.
Ryan sighed with relief.
"Was I just threatened by a pair of preteens?"
Ryan shook his head and followed the group into the den and quickly sat on the couch watching the twins eagerly set up the board game in front of him and Seth.
"So, what are you playing?" He asked awkwardly to his new cousins.
One of the girls smiled at him. "13 Dead End Drive. It's our favourite."
Her sister picked up one of the game pieces and smiled. "Because one minute, you're have the blond boy, who helps around the house," she sat the piece under the chandelier and pushed a button making the plastic toy fall upon the piece, "and next, he's dead."
Ryan swallowed nervously. "Oh. Well that sounds fun." He got up off the couch. "I think I better call Marissa."
"Lucy!" Ryan guessed Laura whispered to her sister. "It's Marissa!"
"You two know Marissa?" Ryan smiled, hoping like hell they liked his girlfriend.
Lucy rolled her eyes at him. "Of course we know Marissa. She went on a pity date with Seth last time we came here."
Ryan shot a look at Seth.
"Hey! That was not a pity date!" Seth said forcefully to his cousins. "The Coopers came along to the restaurant and we talked because we go to the same school."
Ryan nodded and backed out of the den of doom. His only hope was Marissa, to save him from the murderous twins that were going to be staying in the same house as him. He hoped he would be luckier than Cousin Alec, and not have his finger bitten.
Before he reached the phone the doorbell interrupted his thoughts again and quickly made his way to the foyer before Seth could yell. . .
"They're HERE!!!!"
Ryan laughed at Seth's excitement and eyed the twins that stood in the doorway as Seth whipped open the door again with a larger grin than before.
"Seth! Move out of my way!" A pretty girl said pushing Seth's chest and stomping into the house.
"Victoria Walsh! You get back here right now!" An angry voice from the driveway screamed.
Seth bit his lip and took a few steps away from Victoria. "Another fight with your mother?"
She rolled her eyes. "What do you think? She doesn't even want to trust me driving! Vicky, you're going too slow, now too fast, signal here, you missed the turn! Aw! Horseshit!" The girl mocked, yelling at the end.
A woman who looked much like Victoria trudged into the house. "Victoria! Watch your language! Little Seth does not need to hear that!"
The girl turned around angrily. "Mother! Look at Seth! He's my age! I'm sure he's heard worse. Seth; tell her!"
"I'm sure his mother protects him from such foul things. He probably does everything his mother says. Tell her Seth!" Victoria's mother yelled back grabbing onto Seth's arm, while Victoria grabbed onto the other.
"Uh. . . ." Seth managed to mumble. "Ryan, help."
Both the women looked confused and stared up at Seth. "Who's Ryan?" They asked, much to their displeasure.
"I'm Ryan." He said as he stepped forward biting his lip.
The mother rolled her eyes. "Oh, the freeloader."
Victoria scowled. "Oh mother! You are so rude! He is standing right in front of you! He is not a freeloader! Seth told me he has his own job and everything. This boy is your cousin."
Seth swallowed nervously. "Ryan, this is our cousin Sandra, and our second cousin Vickie." He motioned to them once he wriggled his arms free.
Sandra nodded. "That's nice." She walked out of the room with her nose in the air towards the kitchen.
Vickie sighed and rolled her eyes. "Hi Ryan; nice to meet you. Sorry about my mom. She can be a bitch."
"I HEARD THAT!" Sandra yelled from the kitchen.
Vickie rolled her eyes again. "And she has ears like a bat. Thank God she's leaving tomorrow. I get to go home with Granny and Grampie." She smiled. "I'm also glad I don't have to stay in the same room with her like last time."
Seth nodded. "I had no clue an egg beater could be used that way."
"Remember the look on her face after the third hour of trying to get it out of her hair?" Vickie giggled.
Seth laughed. "It gave the twins nightmares for days!"
"VICKIE! IT YOU'RE TELLING THE EGG BEATER STORY. . ."
Vickie laughed as she nudged Ryan. "See, I told you she had ears like a bat."
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A/N: Yuppers! This is supposed to be more of a funny than serious fan fiction. Yeah, I got the idea for this one from my family on my dad's side because they can be really crazy; although no one is as bitchy and blood thirsty as Sandra and the twins. Anyways, I hope this was as good as the first chapter!
REVIEW!!
~Toodles!