A/N: Many people didn't like the way it ended with this letter from Hinata. And I didn't like it too. So, I changed it. A lot. Like I wrote so much, I couldn't stop myself at some point. And it came out much better. If you already read it, I invite you to reread it :)
Warnings: OOC, no happy ending (in a way), a bit of NaruHina (please don't hate, SasuHina fans)
Enjoy and please don't comment hate things as an anonymous. Just make yourself an account and then you can insult me for not liking what I write lol. Thanks a lot!
They will probably be the version of Naruto, too. I'm already on it, but I'll make it a story apart. :)
Lots of Love
PisaVisa
Sasuke
Shit was not good. To say the least. Shit was brewing.
How did it get so out of hand? This is what he was asking himself 24/7, for the last 34 days.
Was it already 34 days? Shit.
Life lost his fun side. He's not partying anymore. Hinata didn't liked it. He stopped it. For her. But she's not here to see it. No. She's far away. Whatever 'far away' means for her. Could also be in the next city.
He doesn't know where. He doesn't know with whom. Doesn't know if she will even come back.
And it's better like this.
He fucked up.
Once again.
Like every time.
It doesn't even surprise him at this point. It's just like everything he does. He's not even trying to hide the fact. It's pointless.
He called Naruto. Tried to make up with him, but he didn't pick up the phone for whatever shitty reason. For 34 days, he didn't pick up. Strange? No.
He knows why. He knows why and understands. But he tries to call him anyway, even then, because he needs to talk to someone. He needs to confess his sins. Needs to confide in anyone. No. Not just anyone. Someone who cared deeply about him, someone who knows him for real. Someone who's not scared of him or tries to keep his temper in check. Not someone who chews on his words.
Someone who just tells him straight in the face that he's a fucking asshole.
And he just needs the other asshole who always gets on his nerves.
But he's with Hinata. Somewhere, where Sasuke can't find her. Probably in the south, he guesses. She has family there. Never went with her when she saw them on breaks. He didn't like her father. He's a conceited fuck-up. Like him in the end. But two of them in one room and hell breaks out.
He never apologized to Hinata for having insulted her dad. He didn't understand why he should. This guy was like the pest, always asking hundreds of questions, wanting to know with what idiots Hinata hung out, trying to break them apart. Always just seeing the bad sides of him, not even considering there might be something positive in him.
But it's okay. Hinata said so. She loved him and told him she didn't give a damn about her father's opinion.
Anyway, Hiashi Hyuga must certainly be the happiest guy on earth, now that Hinata left him. Or Naruto. He can't decide. But anyway.
Like he said, it's pointless to keep thinking about such things.
Hinata left him. For 34 days now. She probably won't come back this time. She took her things and disappeared.
He would have never thought she would do it. More like she could do it. Since he can remember, this girl was in love with him.
He remembers how it started. They met in high school.
She was a shy one. Shy, but damn hot. She had the biggest tits in class and boys their age couldn't focus on anything else. Blame it on the hormones. When he thinks about it, he's a bit ashamed of himself, but teenagers are fucking dumb. And he wasn't the only one, just to get it straight.
He remembers what she told him one evening after having fucked. She was insecure about her body. She felt reduce to it. People didn't try to learn more about her. It resulted in her wearing layers of clothes, but boys already knew how she looked like underneath it. It was pointless.
The shy Hinata only got shyer. She was classified as the weird one in their group of friends. Weirdest but hottest. She still got that for her.
She stuttered. Too much for his liking. Thanks God, it went away when they got together. Anyway, it was even annoying to try having a conversation with her, sometimes.
Sasuke knows when a girl likes him, loves him, or just wants to fuck him. He just knows.
Hinata was one who liked him just at first. The lingering gazes and the extreme stutter when he talked to her were just two of many more proofs.
She liked him for his looks. Like any other girl. But knowing the hottest girl in school liked him, pushed his ego. Feminists would say he got too much of it. And it's okay. He knows it. He's proud and his ego is bigger than his fucking bank account.
It didn't last long before he took her first kiss. It was on one of those parties where people got naked in the pool and were mouthfucking on the dancefloor.
Alcohol was a must. Drugs were a must. And girls were a must.
He heard from other classmates that she thought he seemed nice. Translated in girls' language it meant that she had a crush on him.
He knew, he was anything but nice. And he'll never be nice. He's sure of it.
But that was enough for him to invite her and her friends to this party. She was shocked beyond words. She was trembling in front of him as he took her by her wrist in the empty classroom and told her what, when and where.
She brought three of her friends with her. The pink haired girl, Sakura, the loudmouthed, Ino and the tomboy, Ten-Ten.
They came with Naruto, his best friend. He asked the girls if he should take them to the party, as he was also friends with them. The girls squealed in joy and accepted his offer.
Naruto.
That boy loved his girl. Ex-girl. Whatever. She will always be just his girl.
The blond loved her since beginning of high school. It wasn't obvious but Sasuke knew. That was one of the reasons why he started something with Hinata.
Naruto started befriending her. Trying to get closer to his crush who was oblivious to his advances. It's like she couldn't believe that a boy was nice to her for actually trying to learn more about her and her personality, not because of her looks. She thought Naruto wanted to be her friend.
Boys weren't nice to her. Either they flirted with her, or they insulted her for being weird.
Naruto wasn't like this. He was nice and funny. He went out with her to eat ice cream and study for exams. He was the first boy, since she grew boobs, who treated her like a decent human being. So, yes, she worshipped their beginning friendship.
Maybe Sasuke was jealous. Jealous of Naruto taking the attention off him. Hinata liked him first. It was embarrassing if the most wanted boy in school didn't get the hottest girl in school. He had a reputation and he held dearly to it, to maintain it.
He saw how Naruto cracked some dumb jokes here and there, which ended in Hinata giggling and laughing. He thought she looked cute smiling. Her laugh was soft and heartwarming. Somewhat pleasant, not annoying not like the forced laugh of other girls.
It was like Naruto had found the secret solution to get closer to her.
But he wasn't Naruto. He wasn't funny like him. He wasn't friends with a girl. He couldn't. He claims girls, to throw them away the next day. He's a fuckboy.
Naruto isn't. He has plenty of female friends. He's a social butterfly, always trying to meet new people. It doesn't matter if it's a boy or a girl. Friends are friends, no matter the gender.
And he tried the method of befriending Hinata first, before going further into flirtmode. Naruto didn't want a new friend, he wanted her as his girlfriend. He had a crush on Hinata, Sasuke realized.
And Sasuke didn't like it a bit.
Because Naruto could really get her if he just tried a bit more.
He was a pretty boy. Charismatic and openminded.
Not like Sasuke.
Different aesthetics. He was warm and sunny. Always smiling. Surfer boy look.
Sasuke was cold and dark. Never smiling because there was just no damn reason for it. He was mysterious. Girls liked to believe they could change him.
Hinata tried, but if even she can't do it, then nobody could make it happen.
Anyway, the next day he asked Hinata out to the party, after coming to the realization that Naruto could have a chance. That was the reason why he invited her in the first place, or why he finally made his move on her.
In a way, this is where his little obsession for Hinata started. He could only thank Naruto for the push. Ironic.
He kissed her in front of Naruto's eyes. That got Sasuke a broken nose, but it was okay. Naruto would calm down, eventually. And Hinata took care of him and his injury.
He told her it was because of Naruto and a fight they had. He didn't tell her it was because of her.
In the end, he got what he wanted. Hinata's attention was back at him, and Naruto was out of the picture. He kissed the hottest girl in school (and the weirdest) and his reputation wasn't fazed by it. He was even praised for it because he was the first to get her.
Naruto drove away from him. He said they were still brothers, but he needed time. The blond didn't get why he would do something like that to him when Sasuke exactly knew that his best friend was interested in her.
Sasuke never apologized, even though he felt a bit bad, but he would have never said it out loud. He was too proud. This one word couldn't pass his lips.
Anyway, eventually Naruto forgave him, and they were friends again.
From then on, Hinata and him made out at parties. It was the only time they talked with one another.
In school he ignored her pretty much. He didn't want others to think that he was in a relationship.
Rumors spread fast and he prevented them by just ignoring her.
Naruto still talked to her. He was a good friend of hers now. Sasuke knew that his best friend's feelings wouldn't go away this fast and he couldn't do anything about it, sadly.
Time was Naruto's best friend. Maybe after a time he would start liking another girl. But in the meantime, Sasuke had to keep Hinata in check. He did it by making out with her on said parties.
It wasn't hard. One look of him and she knew what he wanted. And she obeyed.
She was in love with him, now. She didn't 'just' like him. She fell in love.
She wouldn't go back to Naruto. Not that she ever did. She always saw the blond as just a friend, or that's what he thought before, but now Hinata just had eyes for Sasuke.
She was his toy and only his. Even now, when Naruto did find himself a girlfriend who awkwardly looked a lot like Hinata, he wouldn't let her out of eyes.
Sasuke just didn't want to let Hinata fly free. He didn't want any other guy to be with her. Couldn't stand guys flirting with her.
But he couldn't just shoo those boys away. They would think he fell in love. His reputation would be gone.
So, he kept an eye on her while school, never being far away from her, giving her THE look when a boy approached her.
Eventually in their last year, he took her out on dates. She was always around him now, after two years of making out.
He took her first time away. He wanted it to make it special for her. In his way. He invited her over to his apartment. They fucked there. They were sober and they had privacy.
She was a bit special. He could also just have fucked her on a random party, buzzed by the alcohol, where anyone could have entered the room or just do it quickly in the bathroom and plop her cherry there. He already did it to other girls.
But for her, he didn't want that. She deserved at least to have a good memory of her first time. He didn't want her to regret it.
She was the only girl he had invited over till now. His apartment was his safe haven. He didn't let anyone in except Naruto and his brother. Not even his mother could enter his place.
Their first time wasn't romantic, it wasn't bad but not good either. It was painful for her, as for any other girl too. But he tried to be gentle, kissed her, said cheesy things to calm her down.
She was special to him, he had to admit.
Even then when they were not a thing, yet. They didn't even date back then.
She thanked him afterwards. She slept in his arms, snuggled in his chest, stayed the night over. She made him breakfast the next morning. She confessed that she loved him. And yes, he admits that it was nice. It was nice to hear these words. Even though he knew it since a long time.
It took one more year, their senior year, to make it official. They were not together, but they officially started dating.
While they dated, he took her out for McDonald's, drove her to parties with him, so that they got there at the same time, fucked her in any places, and started texting her more than before.
This was dating for him. And she liked it apparently, because this was a way for her of spending more time with him, getting to learn more about him.
He stayed away from girls for a time. Even a long time. The time they were dating, he didn't even look at any girls, anymore. He could have done it. But didn't. He just didn't want. She was his main focus.
He liked her. She was nice, smart, and hot. And her stutter went away.
Things were going good for him.
He eventually asked her to be his girlfriend, two months before graduation. She was so happy.
He kissed her in front of his pals. It was now official. She was the happiest girl in the world.
And he felt good. He thought that he had grown up. Grew out of his fuckboy phase. Because she was, in the end, the only girl he liked hanging around with.
It took time for him to realize but eventually he noticed how she took the spotlight away from others, shining brighter than any other girl.
But his jealousy amplified. He didn't want her to see Naruto anymore. Even then when the blond was still with his girlfriend who looked like a cheap version of Hinata.
He didn't like the way Naruto could make her laugh. Because he, himself, couldn't do it. Not in the way Naruto did it. The way where she had to sit down and get her breath back, holding her stomach because of her, laughing so hard.
He couldn't do it.
And Sasuke didn't like it.
Not even a bit.
It wasn't easy. She didn't want to give up on Naruto as a friend. He made her happy in a way others couldn't. She didn't say it like this, but basically this is what Sasuke heard her say as Hinata explained herself.
He said horrible things to her, afterwards. Belittling her. Saying that she liked to have the eyes of other men on her. Liked to present herself, showing her tits off.
It was low. Very low. He knew it. Especially because she told him about her insecurities.
But what's with his insecurities? He was insecure, too. Yes, Naruto was the only boy he feared.
He was dangerous. He could take his toy away. His girlfriend.
Eventually, after all the fighting, she gave in because she loved him.
She was sad. Naruto was sad. And Sasuke, himself, didn't know if he liked it better that way.
Maybe, they weren't lying when they told him he was misinterpreting things.
Anyway, he got his way and now Hinata was just focused on him. Him and only him.
Most of the time, she slept in his apartment. He never came over to her house because he just hated her family. He told her they were fuckups. She defended them. He mocked her for defending them.
She cried a lot. Never in front of him. Always silently when she thought he was asleep. He asked himself why she stayed with him if she was unhappy.
She could just go. It's not like he was holding her locked up in his apartment. Far from it. He didn't even want her to have her toothbrush in his bathroom. That would mean that she would practically live with him, and he didn't want this. Even though, she came over almost every night because he asked her so.
He put her through a lot. He sees it now. But he can't go back in time.
It wasn't like they hadn't had good times. They were a lot of things they did together which were great.
They often went to the beach together. He went with her to New-Zealand. It was her dream to take a year off before starting college and explore the world. But he told her not to do it. Saying they would most probably break-up if she did because a year is long, and you could grow apart.
And it was true. He was scared of losing her. Scared to get Hinata back, totally changed after a year far away from him. Scared of losing his shit if she wasn't near him. Scared of her finding someone who was better than him, someone like Naruto who treated her like she deserved it.
He was aware of the way he was with her.
And so, he was scared. And he even cried, after having buzzed his head with some random drugs. She was the one who drove him home, the one who stayed with him.
So, he tried to make it up by taking her to anywhere she wanted. Staying in a foreign country one whole month, spending time together and exploring it.
This was the best time of his life. And hers too.
While they were away, he told her that he loved her.
He really meant it.
He realized that only then. It took time but when he finally confessed his feelings it was like he could die happy now.
The realization hit him hard. And once he was aware of his feelings, he couldn't but show her off to the world. From then on, their relationship took a 180° turn.
They were only them too, in their minivan with which they travelled the country. They made love for the first time, not just fucked. It wasn't like all the other times. There were feelings involved now. From both sides. And he never had such good sex.
Making love was overwhelming. Everything felt ten times more intense.
He was so happy.
So, so happy.
He wasn't afraid of what he felt. For the first time in his life, he let loose of his emotions. And it felt damn good. It felt good to just say it out loud.
He never felt this close to someone while in New-Zealand.
They did a lot of hiking in unusual places, sometimes even dangerous places. They climbed the Mount Tongariro. Instead of 7 hours they did it in 9 hours. Hinata got quickly out of breath. When it wasn't too steeply, he carried her on his back.
They did night-bathing. Naked.
They smoked weed in some of those cheap hostels. Made friends.
In Queenstown, he went skydiving. He felt free. Like a bird.
In Dunedin, he went for the first time in his life in a thrift shop. It was a nice experience. They costumed themselves with whatever they found.
They talked to the Indigenous. They invited them over to let them see their culture. It was nice.
In Wellington, they stayed in an Airbnb. The Chinese woman who lived their shood them out of her house when she saw them using her kitchen utensils. Crazy woman, but she warned them. It was fun. He made her laugh a lot. He was like another person there.
They went to the sea afterwards and saw dolphins or whatever these were. They slept there, in their minivan under the night sky, stargazing.
They made love. A lot. Not a day passed without them touching each other.
He saw her smile a lot. She was happy with him. Not like back home. She never cried. Never looked disappointed in him, here.
He told her not once but millionth times that he loved her. Even more than she did. He had to make up for all the times she said it without him giving her an answer. But it was okay.
He felt like he was himself for the first time in his life.
He didn't have to put on a mask.
He knew she would love him anyway. He smiled much more than before. If someone from school saw him there, they would say he was crazy. Crazy for Hinata.
They visited the whole South Island, and when they took their plane back to Auckland, he wished they could stay a little longer. He didn't want to go back home. Anything but going home.
First months back in France weren't so bad. He distanced himself from those supposed friends like Suigetsu and Jugo. They were just sheep who followed the movement, Hinata explained him. She was right. He should have broken their friendship off, a long time ago. It's not even that he liked them, in the first place.
They were annoying. Rude. Losers who couldn't get a girlfriend. People who couldn't be serious.
He didn't belong to them anymore. Since his trip, he wanted to change things.
He got into the same college as Hinata, to stay near her.
He finally made up his mind and suggested that they could live together in Bordeaux. Take an apartment together, for the two of them.
She agreed, even though her father was strictly against it. But she wanted it and so her dad finally gave in, paying half of their flat bill.
Sasuke's parents never met Hinata. It didn't seem to bother her, though. She asked what they were like, but he never wanted to talk about them. His father was a stuck-up like her dad. A meaner version. Hinata's, at least, cared for the wellbeing of his daughters. His dad did not. If it wasn't for his mom, Sasuke would have slept on the streets. He was a disappointment in his father's eyes.
They got him an own flat, at the age of sixteen, because they didn't get along. That's what he told Hinata. There was much more to it than he would tell. He wasn't ready to talk openly about it.
Naruto was the only one who knew what was going on.
But they weren't friends anymore. They've become strangers since he told Hinata that she had to break-off their friendship. That also meant the end of their brotherly relationship.
Sasuke knew it was a result from what he pulled. But he still had Hinata. She's all he needs.
Till she wasn't enough anymore.
That's when he started flirting with other girls.
He tried somethings with her best friends.
He tried, but her girlfriends slapped him. The dumb blonde punched him hard in the face, the half boy kicked him in his guts and well, Sakura… Sakura was another story. She didn't physically abuse him. She cried instead. Told him that she was in love with him but couldn't do something like that to Hinata.
She was a loyal friend and told his girlfriend and her best friend every detail. Sakura didn't forget a word about what they'd talked about. Hinata wasn't mad, was even proud of Sakura and tried to comfort her.
Hinata slapped him and said something about "girls support girls" and something else about how fucked up he was. It was okay. It was true. He didn't even know why he wanted to sleep with them. He wasn't attracted to them. He thinks it was because he needed validation at some point in their relationship.
Anyway, it was like he was in a Korean Drama. The girls cried together and apologized profusely to one another. Sakura for loving her boyfriend and Hinata for having taken her crush away.
It was a mess, to say the least.
And he tried to win her back, pestered her with messages and even came over to her house to ask for forgiveness because she was important to him. They were a couple and he loved her, so he thinks that was only right to beg her to come back.
He didn't want to lose her. Was too afraid. She listened and calmed him down. She made him laugh.
She saw him crying after having withdrawal symptoms from taking LSD after their break-up. She was there. With Naruto. She called the blond idiot.
Did they talk all along, secretly without him knowing anything about it? Probably. But he couldn't blame her, though. He just tried to fuck her best friends. So, she, talking to Naruto behind his back, will never be as bad as what he tried to pull.
The way he saw Naruto embracing Hinata as she cried silently in the kitchen after this whole LSD thing, crushed his heart. They thought he was sleeping in their bedroom. But he had to get up for a glass of water, having a bad headache.
He felt like someone had smacked his head against a wall.
He tiptoed to not wake anyone up, to make himself a glass of water. He saw Naruto caressing HIS girlfriend's hair, towering over her, trying to make her look up at him, to wipe her tears away.
Sasuke saw how she obeyed, and how his girlfriend's and his best friend's gazes locked. He's jealous but won't interrupt them.
"You have to let him go, Hinata." He heard Naruto say.
"I…I just can't…" She sobbed in his arms, crushing against his chest. Sasuke realized it was his doing. And he wants to feel sorry. Sorry for how he makes her feel. But he can't. Because he's jealous and all he can see is Naruto's arms around her, touching his girlfriend, kissing the crown of her head.
His mouth feels pasty. He needs to drink even more now but won't allow them to see how crestfallen he feels right now.
He feels how tears of anger begin to pool in the corner of his eyes. He won't cry again. He promises himself. He already showed his vulnerable side enough.
He wants to break something. Fight Naruto, even though he was the one with Hinata who came to his rescue. Wants to scream at Hinata for being so oblivious to Naruto's feelings, to let him do whatever he wants with her.
His heart feels heavy. Heavy from all the things he has to take in.
His body feels like he already fought against five wrestlers. But it's just the internal fight he has right now with himself.
Naruto catches him staring. They have an eye contest. Sasuke sees how Naruto shoots him daggers, his disappointment visible. Sasuke knows what the blond is thinking. Why on earth would Hinata want to stay with him?
But it doesn't faze him. He shoots Naruto daggers too. Tries to kill him with his onyx eyes. Tries to make him feel small, like he does it with Hinata.
But it's Naruto. And Naruto isn't scared of him. He rivals his glare.
Hinata is still buried in the blonde's chest. She sobs, and Sasuke sees how Naruto's hold on her tightens.
He watches, not missing a single second of the scene.
Naruto mumbles something to her, only audible for her ears, still looking at Sasuke. Hinata nods, her face still on his chest.
Sasuke feels himself crumble at the side of them together. He wants to be the one holding Hinata, protecting her from the world and being her crying shoulder. His heart hurts now as if someone had stabbed him. His throat tightens and he feels like he's about to suffocate. He decides he's seen enough and just clicks his tongue to make himself noticed.
Hinata looks up, startled, not expecting him to stand there. He sees her red and puffy eyes and again his heart breaks a little. 'It's my doing' he repeats inwardly. Like a mantra.
"Sasuke…" It's the only thing she says, can say, as she's burned by those onyx eyes of him.
"Come to bed." Is the only thing he says in turn, more like he orders. And she complies, freeing herself from Naruto, before giving him a last hug.
Sasuke wants to throw up seeing their closeness but remains silent. He smirks seeing Naruto's face decompose as she let go of him to turn towards Sasuke.
"Hinata, it's best if you let Sasuke alone tonight. I keep an eye on him. You're tired." Naruto clears his throat, and even it's directed to Hinata, the blonde's stare is directed towards him, transmitting a silent message.
"But…"
"You can sleep in my apartment."
"She will not sleep in your apartment. She's in her home, right now. She lives here. With me." Sasuke finally answers for Hinata. His throat feels sore. Sore from the vomiting, sore from the crying, sore from the hurt he feels.
Sasuke observes how Naruto's face contorts. He frowns, not happy how the brunet reminds him that Hinata is not his and this fills Sasuke with satisfaction.
"She won't sleep here. She's tired. She did enough, already. If she's here, she has to take care of you." The last word is pronounced with so much venom, that it stings. As if he was a burden. And he knows he is. But it doesn't mean that Naruto is allowed to say it.
Hinata stands there, watching them both, eyes wide as if it was a movie. She's quiet, not knowing herself what to say.
"She stays here. End of discussion. Now go. I can take care of myself." He knows he can't. He always relies on others. On Naruto. On Hinata. But again, he's too proud to admit it.
"You just proved that you can't." Naruto counters and finally turns to Hinata. "I'll stay here. My keys are on the counter, Hinata. You know where I live." His voice turns soft and a smile forms on his lips, reassuring Hinata that it's okay.
How the fuck does she know where he lives?
She sighs, looks one last time over to Sasuke. She goes to him, her petite form approaching. She looks pretty, even though she must have cried a lot. But she's Hinata, and he thinks she's pretty no matter the situation. She's always glowing, in his eyes. Bringing the warmth wherever she steps foot in.
"Go to bed, Sasuke. I will be there tomorrow morning."
She tries to force a tired smile on her lips and kisses Sasuke on the cheek, her fingers gliding along his jaw, before finally taking Naruto's keys from the counter and disappearing into the night.
Sasuke can't believe it. She's gone and now he's stuck with the idiot. Anger bubbles up in him but he won't show it. He doesn't want to make a fool out of himself. Not more than he already did. And even less in front of Naruto, who must be pretty satisfied that Hinata did what he asked her for.
Sasuke wants to turn around, go back in his room, break something, anything he gets his hand on. He doesn't want to see Naruto, now. He's fed up and still tired.
"You're bad for her." He hears Naruto's dark voice. Sasuke scoffs because who is he to judge him.
"And you should take care of your girlfriend."
"And you should just shut the fuck up and listen." He feels the glare boring into his back, still not turning around to face Naruto. "You're bad and you're treating her like shit." He keeps talking.
"And how do you know it? As long as I remember were not friends anymore. Nor her and you. So, tell me, what do you know of my relationship with Hi-Na-Ta?"
"What I know is that you don't deserve her."
"Who does deserve her, huh? Maybe you? Is that what you're trying to say? That she's in better hands with you?" Sasuke feels his hands sweating and his heart racing.
"This isn't about me but Hinata. Don't you want her happy?"
"What I want is you out of our apartment. But we don't always get what we want." He mutters while making himself a glass of water, like he intended to do before he had to witness Naruto and his girl. His hands are shaky, his vision blurry, but he manages to drink without spilling half of it on the floor.
"You're just thinking about yourself, just like every time…" Naruto mumbles under his breath, but he hears him clearly.
"Mind your own business. She will never be yours if it's what you're thinking about."
"You're ruining her life. Do you know how many times she cried? Do you know how broken she is? Do you even know her? Did you know that it was your second anniversary when she caught you cheating? You're not worthy of her." Naruto yells now, coming near him. Dangerously close. And Sasuke knows that if they fight, he won't hold back.
"I did not cheat on her." Sasuke hisses, teeth clenched, trying to remain cool-headed.
"You would have if Sakura had agreed. But not everyone is like you. Some people still have values and principles. Not. Like. You."
"When will you finally see that she will never be more than a friend to you?" He's exasperated, now. He already heard enough about this.
"Again, it's not about me, dumbass. It's Hinata we're talking about. Even now, you don't give a damn about her and what she feels. Even now, when she was once again here for you, taking care of your sorry ass."
"Shut up. Just, shut the fuck up." He throws the glass of water against the wall. The last string of self-control gone. Silence takes over the place. His breath is heavy. His guilty conscience, which he always tries to bury away, resurfaces.
"You're sick. And you know it." Is the only thing Naruto says, sneering, his eyes fixed on the broken glass.
"Ya' know what?" he continues. "If Sakura would have slept with you, Hinata would have been pissed but would still have understood. Because Sakura has feelings for you since like… forever! Sakura would have had a valid reason. But she loves her friend so much, that she put her feelings aside because she didn't wanna lose Hinata. But you? You didn't have any reason to hurt Hinata like this. And the only reason why she's still, here, for you, is not because she still loves you. No. It's because she feels responsible for you like you were her kid. She feels sorry for your sorry ass." Deep blue eyes clash with dark onyx eyes, challenging them to contradict him.
"That's why she fucked me one week ago…" Sasuke lies, trying to hurt Naruto in his way, knowing very well that he hit a raw nerve. Hinata didn't sleep with him when she came over to take her things. But every word of Naruto sting and he knows how to hurt his best friend. He didn't miss a single one.
'Hinata still loves me. Hinata still loves me. Hinata still loves me.' He repeats over and over again to calm himself down. Why would she take care of him if not because she still loves him?
"Don't you think she knew about the other girl? Did you think she just knew about Sakura, Ino and Ten-Ten? No, but she didn't give a fuck about the other bitches. But trying something with her best friends? Betraying her in the worse way possible, even though she was always there for you? Even for you it's low."
Sasuke remains silent to that. So, she did know about this.
"You never value what you have in life. You're trampling on it like it isn't worth anything. Like your relationship with her. Like the relationship with your brother. Like our friendship…"
"Go away."
"Can't do. I promised her to keep an eye on you."
"I promise it remains our little secret. Now go away." Sasuke sneers and sits down on the couch, turning the TV on, trying to ignore the presence of his 'rescuer'.
"Like I said can't do."
"Stop trying to play the hero. You're as much of a loser as I am. If it makes you happy, I will tell her that you insisted on staying but I kicked you out. I'm sure she will be impressed, and you'll gain some points with her."
"Dude, you didn't get anything."
"What should I get? How you want to try to fuck her?"
"Sasuke, stop it. I have a girlfriend."
"Stop being a hypocrite." Sasuke pauses for a moment, enjoying the dumbfounded expression on Naruto's stupid face. "You always loved her."
"Stop it."
"Stop what? From saying the truth? You're not better than me, y' know?" He imitates the blond who usually has always something to say, but not now. Struck a nerve there.
The seat next to him plops down.
He thinks they are both hypocrites. Him, for saying he loves Hinata but cheats on her afterwards and Naruto, for not admitting his feelings and trying to cope with a random girl.
"I love Shion."
"But not as much as Hinata."
"What do you know, huh? Hinata is my friend."
"Face the truth, Naruto. Where is your girlfriend now? In her own apartment, not knowing that Hinata sleeps in your bed, right?"
"She will understand."
"Understand what? That you let a random girl sleep in your flat? In your bed, no less."
"I would do this for any other of my friends."
"You're as bad as me. You're cheating on your girlfriend by loving another woman. Did she know that she was just the second choice?"
"She never was the second choice."
"You don't say…" Sasuke smirks, inwardly laughing at the stupidity of his best friend.
"What are you trying here?"
"Just speaking facts. Again, you're a hypocrite. The second Hinata will show some interest in you, you'll let this girlfriend of yours go."
Naruto didn't say anything to that.
"You ruined her life."
"Oh, stop that shit. Stop repeating yourself over and over again. It's boring. And I ruined as much Hinata's life as you ruined the life of the blond bitch."
"Stop calling her that."
"You ruined Shion's life as much as I ruined Hinata's life. Period. Does she see how you look at Hinata? With those blue loving eyes of yours. Does she see how every time Hinata looks at you, you smile like an idiot? Trying to impress her. Does she know that the only reason you asked her out was because you could imagine Hinata while fucking her?"
"Stop being so crude. It's not true!"
"I'm still surprised that she still has her hair blond and not black."
"Fuck you."
"I'm curious. Did it happen that you accidentally called out Hinata's name while you two fucked? How did she react?" Sasuke knew he was pushing it too far. But it was nice seeing the roles reversed, Naruto's panicked expression, close from bursting out and slapping him across the face.
"Burn in hell, asshole." Naruto's knee was trembling, and his jaw clenched, trying to look not fazed by those accusations, biting down on his tongue to not let slip out the truth.
"Oh, so you're not denying."
"I'm not denying it because I just don't have to proof anything to a moron like you."
"You should because now I'm pretty sure you did all those things."
"Then you're even more stupid than I thought."
"Stop your little play, would you? It's hella annoying."
"Okay. So, what if I did all those things."
"Ah now were talking! I was already scared your true self wouldn't come out. But you didn't change one bit. Still as dumb as in high school. Tell me one thing. Be honest, please, while we're at it. Did you stay in contact with Hinata all along?"
"Not all along."
"What does 'not all along' mean?"
"She texted me some months ago."
"Why?"
"To know what I was doing."
"Interesting."
"We texted. A lot. Trying to catch up for the lost year. She told me about how cool it was in New-Zealand with you. That she missed talking to me. Missed me as her friend."
"Did she tell you how often we fucked?"
"No. Seems like it wasn't as important to her as to you."
Touché.
"Is it why you're staying with her? Because she's good in bed?" Naruto continues, but Sasuke stays quiet.
"Apparently no, because you wouldn't have tried to cheat on her if it was the case." The blond answers for him.
"Don't talk about her like this."
"I'm not talking about her. She's great. I know why you love her. And you're the lucky asshole to have her. And still, you manage to ruin it. You're not worthy of her love, Sasuke. You broke her in so many ways. Your coldness. Your general attitude. The way you're talking to her as if she was your dog on a leash. She's human and deserves more than what you're giving her."
"And you would be the one to give her what she deserves, right?"
"I couldn't. Because she deserves the world. But I would try. Unlike you."
"Stop saying those cheesy things. It's embarrassing. You sound like you're obsessed with her."
"If you think so. But as I know you're as obsessed with her as I am."
"I'm her boyfriend. I can be obsessed."
"Ex-boyfriend."
"Whatever."
"Want a beer?"
"Yeah."
After this evening, they didn't stay in contact. They both knew, even though they missed the presence of the other, that it just wouldn't work out. They accepted both that they had feelings for Hinata.
Naruto said he wouldn't go in between them, but if Hinata left him the next time, he would protect her and keep her away from him.
Sasuke accepted it. But in return he told Naruto to stay away from her.
Hinata came over the next day, like she said. They talked it over. He pleaded her to give him a second chance. Second chance? No, more like the fifth or sixth chance.
Still, he did not apologize. He told her he loved her but saying this one word, he couldn't.
He started seeing her distancing herself from him, after making up. He tried to be a good boyfriend. He really tried. He let her check his phone, but she refused.
He's not going to parties for a while.
But she pushed him to go, to have fun, to socialize with 'study buddies' as she called his acquaintances because she just knows that if she doesn't let him, that he will betray her once again. That's what he thinks.
She turned cold. She lost the sparkle in her eyes. She's tired, he notices. He tries to take her out, but she refuses saying that she must learn for college.
He tells her every day, more than once, that he loves her. But it doesn't have the same effect as before. She always looks at him as if she sensed a lie coming. She doesn't believe him. She doesn't say it in return.
It's cold. Their whole relationship did turn cold.
He's afraid. Afraid that she slips through his fingers, once again. He knows that he betrayed her in the worse possible way. He promised to never talk to one of her friends again. But it's not enough to regain her trust.
It's just not enough.
He thinks that she doesn't care anymore. The way she throws him out of the apartment under the pretext that he should have fun while she works. He suspects her to cheat on him while he's away.
But she's really always at home. Always.
Watching TV. Cooking with her friends. Working for school.
They go to the beach sometimes, like they did before. There, he sees her smile. Looking happy and relaxed. Not like at home. There, she seems tense around him, ignoring him but still having an eye on him, watching if he comes back home drugged.
Ah, drugs.
She thinks that he's a drug addict.
She never said it out loud, but he suspects her thinking so.
He feels like his on watch. As if she waited for the moment for him to mess things up, again.
It's toxic, he realizes. From both sides. He doesn't think it's because of him forbidding her to go anywhere without him. Accusing her of cheating.
No.
He still thinks it's because she doesn't trust him because of his slip-up. Also, he thinks it's because of her not saying things out loud. She never speaks out her thoughts. Always keeping for herself. She asks him questions, half-heartedly, feigning interest, but he knows she doesn't care anymore.
She's lost. And empty.
And it was his doing.
And then he remembers what Naruto told him. 'She doesn't love you anymore. It's because she feels responsible for you.'
That would explain why she's always watching him in the corner of her eyes, looking for anything suspicious.
She's controlling him, silently, while he's controlling her openly.
It's toxic. Like he said.
He doesn't know anymore.
He's asking himself questions.
Does she stay with him because he's not letting her go and always tries to win her back?
Is she so cold because she doesn't love him anymore? Or is it because she doesn't wanna be hurt again, being vulnerable?
Does she watch him as much because she's scared that he falls back in the drug hole? Or is it because she just wants to see if he had a good time? Or maybe just to see in what mood he is?
Why does she stay at home all the time? Because she needs the time away from him or because she really doesn't wanna go out?
Why does she push him to go out, alone? To make himself some new friends. To confront him to danger? Like girls? To see if she can trust him?
It's so much to think about.
So much.
And he tries to win her back. To keep her alive. Because he feels like she's dying in this relationship, closing in on herself. Just seeing her friends in school or calling them on the phone.
He just doesn't get it.
So, he stays at home with her, even though she wants him to have fun. He wants to cuddle with her, like they did months ago. To love her like she deserved it. Because Naruto's words echo in his head.
He feels like he did ruin her.
Ruined her bubbly side. Her happy being.
He ruined everything, like he always did.
Because he's selfish and can't let her go.
Because he just wants her for himself.
After those thoughts, he came home deflated. Was there any chance to get back on the right track? Was it too late to apologize for all his mistakes and to start from scratch one? To woo her like any other male would do. To pamper her. To love her. To compliment her. Like the princess she deserves to be.
Was it too late? Or is there still a chance?
He doesn't know because he made so many bad decisions that it seems impossible to just erase all those past selfish actions of his.
He wants to get in there and just take her in his arms. To whisper sweet words into her ear and make love afterwards, lose himself in her intoxicating lavender scent and to never get out of their bed.
But she's not here when he enters the place.
It's silent. Too silent for his taste.
There's no one cooking for him tonight. The stoves stay clean and cold. There's no delicious smell coming from the kitchen, and he doesn't see his sweet girlfriend with an apron around her waist, her hair up in a high ponytail and her lilac bunny slippers on her feet.
No, there's no one. The flat is empty.
And it feels cold. So cold… But it's like this since some time now. Why should he expect anything else?
So, he just sits on the couch, waiting for her to return from wherever she is. Checking out his phone for any new text message he could get.
But nothing.
No damn text messages from 'Hinata'. Yeah, because he just had her saved with her name in his phone. No smiley, no pet name. No, just 'Hinata'.
He looks at the clock on the wall and the sound that's coming from it gets on his nerves, the more time passes.
He swipes through their chat, but he doesn't remember her telling him anything about coming home late tonight. She didn't tell him about a girls' night out or a family meeting. It's Wednesday night, so yeah, he thinks it's weird.
Now that he wants to have a real conversation about their relationship, she's not here. Is it Karma which finally hits back? Probably. This is for all the nights he spent with college friends till late at night.
He deserves it. Even though she was the one who told him to go out. Girls always say one thing and mean another. He wouldn't be surprised if it was just a test from Hinata and he didn't pass it. Again. Like always. Because when was the last time, he did something right? Yeah, he can't even remember.
At 11 pm, he hears the clinking of keys and there she is, with just some joggers and her college sweater. Her hair is pulled in a messy bun and her face is free of any make-up. She looks as always stunning. In his eyes, she's always beautiful. Because she's a babe. His babe.
So, she comes in with two grocery bags and he runs up to her to take it out of her hands.
Her smile is a tired smile, a forced smile. One he just sees too often on her face lately.
They unpack in silence. No one dares to kill the heavy and suffocating air they're breathing. No one dares to watch the other, concentrating on just one task.
But both know it's time to talk. Like really talk.
And so, he takes her by the wrist gently, towering over her. She watches him finally with her big doe-like eyes and he loses himself in her pearly orbs, which he fell in love with a long time ago.
He watches her from close too, and he notices the dark rings under her eyes, the straight line her lips form and the slight blush on her cheeks and that's what makes him smile because: she's still alive. Her blush is the only thing that makes him see that she's still here with him.
He still has the power to make her feel flustered. And he enjoys it silently while putting his head on hers, taking her in his arms, feeling her small body against his big.
First still stiff, she finally relaxes, snuggling against his chest and surrounding him with her thin arms.
"I… We… We need to talk." She mumbles, but he hears her clearly. His heart tightens hearing those words but it's what they need to do.
"Yeah, I guess we should." She pushes his body, slowly away from his and he lets her do, even though it's been a long time they held each other like this, and he already misses her warmth.
He sits on the highchair at the kitchen island, and she leans against it on the other side. There's too much distance for him. He can't reach her, but he figures out she needs this space. He knows her and he's aware of the need of her safe space. This is what she calls it.
"Where were you?" He asks to break the ice and he wants to slap himself because, again, he sounds so demanding.
"At the beach. I… Had to think about… Things." She answers, her gaze lost in space.
"I see…"
"Yeah." His eyes are fixed on her, and he wishes she would just look up for just one second. Just one second. To smile at her and try to convey to her that it's okay. It's okay whatever she'll tell him.
But she stands there, her eyes riveted on the apples in the fruit bowl and doesn't dare to look up. Scared of his reactions to what she might say.
That's what he thinks.
"Talk to me, Hinata. Please." The hurt in his voice can't be ignored and finally she looks up and crosses his gaze and there he sees it. The tears which are pooling in the corner of her beautiful eyes. And he hates it so much normally, but now he's relieved. Because she's alive. One more proof that she's not gone.
"It's just… I don't know what to say anymore." It's like a pang in his chest but he swallows it like the adult he is and just nods.
"Tell me of what you're scared. That would be a start."
"I'm not scared, Sasuke. I'm terrified." She bites the inner of her cheek, trying to be strong but the crack in her voice just proves that she's anything but, right now.
"Babe, tell me."
"I can't anymore, Sasuke. I reached my limit. And that terrifies me because for the first time since there was an 'us', I can't come up for any reason to why I should stay..." Finally, the tear drops fall down, and he wants to swipe it away, cup her cheek and kiss her tenderly.
But he guesses, it's too late to do this.
"We can work on it…"
"No, we can't." She cuts him off with just a whisper. And he's stunned and proud of her in a way. "I don't want to, anymore. And I'm so, so sorry…"
"You don't have to be. I guess, I fucked up a lot." She doesn't even try to contradict him, but, again, it's okay because he knows he's a mess.
A sigh escapes his lips, and he feels small. Like the biggest asshole on planet earth.
And he is. Clearly. He should fight for her, like he did all those times before, but did anything change? No. He just broke her more and more.
"I guess I had also my part to contribute to this mess we call relationship. Maybe, I should have put you more at ease. You were jealous. Too jealous. And still are. But I never thought I would give others mixed signals. I always was just yours."
Nor she, nor he can tear their gaze away from the other and they lose themselves in the other's eyes. She in his black onyx eyes she loves so much and he in her diamonds.
"You had me since you asked me for the first time to join this party. I was just yours, Sasuke. So why?"
"Because I'd never had something to call my own."
"Am I just an object for you? Is this all I am?"
"Stop saying nonsense. That's not what I meant, and you know it." He cuts her off. Why would she say such bullshit?
"Yeah, I guess I know…" Finally, her eyes wander off to her feet, not able to stand his dark eyes on her small figure. Silence settles in and it's not even uncomfortable because both are lost in thoughts.
"You know how much I love you, right? You know that you're everything to me."
"Am I? Am I really? Because it hasn't felt like this for a long time." She sneers. Why should she know it? He tried to fuck her best friends.
"You are." She nods, still unable to look up.
"Maybe I trapped you in a relationship you never wanted. I guess, it would explain a lot of things to why I was never enough." He hates the way she's self-pitying herself.
"Are you saying this because of my slip-up?" He feels anger bubbling up because now it reminds him of her and Naruto while standing in the kitchen way and embracing each other.
"This wasn't just a slip-up, Sasuke. This was the start of all our problems. I just don't get it. We were so happy when we came from New-Zealand. So why?"
"Because I'm an idiot."
"Is this your excuse for everything?"
"What should I tell you? You wouldn't believe a word."
"You could try."
"I'm in love with you, Hinata. Damn fucking in love. You and only you! All these girls were nothing compared to you! From the first day I laid my eyes on you, I knew you were gonna be much more than just anybody. You are everything to me, Hinata! God damn it and get this into your head, for fucks sake!" He stands up with too much force, kicking the stool to the ground.
She doesn't flinch. She doesn't move. She's there looking like a doll. Pretty and lifeless.
Is she so used to his outbursts that it doesn't have any effect on her?
He doesn't know how to make her understand. She would see the panic in his eyes if she would just look up for once.
He didn't know that this was what scared him the most. That she would think for just a second that he didn't love her. But she can't see it if she just looks down on the ground, not even fazed by his reactions. Why can't she just see how much he loves her?
"You didn't force me. I didn't feel trapped. Never. You could have been my salvation if I wasn't such an idiot." He keeps going.
"So why? Why? This is what I'm asking myself 24/7. Every second of the day. And saying that you're an idiot isn't really an explanation." She slaps her hands on the counter, despair written on her face.
"Because I'm dumb. Because I never value what I have in life. Because I always want more. Even though you're everything I need." He recalls Naruto's words. Those words which were like a slap to his face. Those words which he didn't want to hear because it's just the damn truth.
"What did you imagine? That I could just see past all this? That I could get used to you flirting with other girls while I trust you with all my heart?"
"Fuck, no, I don't know what I thought! I… I just don't know…" He sits down again, shoulders slumping.
"I don't know, too. Did you think just once about apologizing to me? For all the shit I went through because of you?" She never talks like this. Never. And it's his doing.
Even the perfect girl can have cracks in her façade and now he sees that he really ruined her.
"Would you really wanna hear an apology if you have to demand it from me? Come on, Hina. You know it wouldn't be sincere." He sounds like the biggest asshole on planet earth but it's not even to make her feel worse. It's just the truth.
"I guess so." Her short answers are vague and disappointing. He wants her to speak what really is on her mind. He tries to make her lose her calm, but he remembers that's Hinata and that she's not like him. She doesn't jump on every opportunity to vent her frustration out.
She takes a glass out of the cabinet and fills it with tape water, drinking it in one gulp. He looks fascinated at her, and he doesn't know why. Maybe she tries to drink herself some courage.
"It's too much. I mean I love you but at the same time I'm beginning to hate you. And I try to see past all those things you did but I can't."
"You can't because Naruto tried to convince you to leave me?" He knows that this was not the right thing to say but he can't keep his mouth shut.
"God, this is just great! Again, with this silly accusation!" She massages her temples feeling the migraine coming. "My dad didn't get me to leave you, so why should Naruto achieve it? Why are you even talking about him? Why do you always talk about him?! It's about me and you!"
"Because he has everything to do with it! Open your eyes, damn it! He literally said to you 'It's time to let him go'!"
"He said it because I cried, again! He was the one who saw me breaking down. Because of you!"
"Fuck, I'm not having this talk with you, Hinata."
"Good. Because I won't have it with you. This is ridiculous. I'm in a relationship with you, Sasuke. With you! Since like two years, if you remember well. And I spent three more years waiting for you to love me back! I ran after you. So why are you so damn insecure?!" He sees how she will break down at any given moment and he wants to stand up and take her in his arms but it's not his place to do it, right now. She will hate him even more if he won't let her let everything out for once. She finally got the courage to do so, so he won't stop her.
He doesn't recognize his sweet girlfriend who's always gentle and caring and adorable. All he sees is a woman who has held back for much too long.
"Because you're turning a blind eye to everything that surrounds you. You don't see how men ogle you. I see it!"
"Stop this, Sasuke. We had this talk like a million times. I'm not doing this. I'm just seeing you! You are my world and that's exactly where lies the problem. Everything in my life revolves around you. Since I was 16! I'm 21 now! When can I find myself?" She looks so sad that it breaks his heart. And all he can do is watch her cry while he sees his world collapse.
"Am I such a burden to you?" He finally says after what felt like an eternity. His hands are shaking, and he hides them under the desk.
"You're not a burden, Sasuke…" Why is she lying? Naruto said it, fuck, even he, himself knows it. "But you take a lot of space and I… I want to start caring about myself…"
"I don't wanna lose you, Hinata."
"Me neither but I don't know what else to do."
"This is toxic."
"Yeah, it is…"
"Can you come over here, please?" She sighs but does as he asked her, and she leans against him, her face buried in the crook of his neck. She sobs loudly, crying for the first time in his arms.
And even though, it's horrible to see her like this, it's the first time he can comfort her. Even though he's the reason why she's in this state.
His hands glide over her back, caressing her long, silky hair. He smells her intoxicating lavender scent, and he tries to take everything in.
Because maybe it'll be the last time having her so close to him.
He surrounds her with his arms, holding her close to him. He feels a tear rolling down his cheek but swipes it away as fast as possible because he isn't the one who needs to be comforted right now.
She is.
He finally does what he should have done all those times before. And he enjoys it. He feels like the man he should have been. Like the adult he should be. Like the boyfriend she should have got.
Because she deserves the world, like Naruto said.
But he can't give it to her.
Not while he still tries to cope with his miserable childhood, the shitty relationship he had with his father, the jealousy he felt for his brother and the misplaced rivalry with his best friend.
She deserves to be happy. And even though he could make her happy, he can't do it right now. He needs to get help. Needs to heal first before he tries to love her wholly.
Because if he doesn't, he will just keep dragging her with him into the darkness.
"I love you so much, Hinata. I love you so damn much. And I'm so, so sorry for everything I put you through. So, so sorry." He whispers into her ear and that just makes her cry even more.
He doesn't know when, but at some point, he took her bridal style and sat down on the couch, she, cradling his lap, covered by a blanket while he is just there for her, kissing her to soothe the pain.
"It's okay, babe. I'm here." His hands wander under her shirt, feeling the softness of her skin and she really calms down after a while, feeling protected by him.
"I really thought we would end up together, loving us for the rest of our lives. Having kids and getting married, growing old together…"
"Me too... I will always love you, Hinata. Always. Maybe were not meant to be. But no one can take away the love we feel for each other."
"Can you promise me one thing, Sasuke?"
"Everything you want."
"Find happiness."
"I don't think I can be happy without you. It will be damn hard."
"Happiness doesn't depend on other people. People who surround you make it more fun but in the end you have to reach this peace of mind."
"You're always watching too many chick-flicks." He feels himself crack a smile and she giggles softly.
"Probably. But you loved watching them with me."
"Yeah, but just because you always let me touch your boobs."
"That's why you looked crestfallen after watching 'The Notebook'. Because you couldn't touch my boobs." She finally looks up at him, smiling and all he can do is taking in her beautiful face. As if he had to memorize all the details.
"Yeah, that's why." He whispers not looking away from her eyes.
"It will hurt so much." He finally says and she just nods, both knowing what will happen after this.
"It will but it's for the best. We thought we found us, but life didn't think like this."
"It will take time, that's for sure."
"It will. I'm sure you'll find your soulmate."
"I thought I found you."
"Maybe in another life we can be together."
"Can I kiss you one last time?" Is all he says.
"You can." And for the first time in his life, he's really nervous, knowing that it could be the last.
His eyes are fixed on her lips, and slowly he approaches them. He licks her lips, tasting the strawberry on them before finally taking them in a longing kiss.
It's probably the best kiss they ever had, pouring both all their feelings out in just this one kiss.
He feels her hand cradling his shoulders, before wandering off to the nape of his neck and playing with the hair. He cups her face to bring her even closer to him, feeling the warmth radiating from her body and it feels so good. So, so good.
He never wants to end it. He never wants to end them. Him and Hinata.
But everything must come to an end, so she's the one who finally pulls back because he wouldn't have the strength to do it. And he smiles at her, saying thank you for everything in his way while she does the same.
34 days past now.
It's fucking hard but he tries to be strong.
He doesn't know where she is, nor with whom, but he hopes she's not doing as miserable as him.
She deserves to be happy, and he tries to remember what she told him before leaving him. The thing with the happiness.
But he can't believe her. She was the one making him happy.
But he lost her.
Because he fucked up.
Like he always did.
I understand if you don't like it.
I'm not asking you to love it and I'm curious about what you might think of it. Just keep from hate comments. But reviews are welcomed.
Lots of Love
PisaVisa