Disclaimer: I own nothing except for Catherine. The rest is all Tolkien.
A.N. : Hi, it's me again, with another chapter. I just want to say I don't know any Elfish, Quenya or whatsoever. If anybody could give me the elfish translation of Little Dreamer, or something that would pass for it, then I would be very grateful. I would also like to point out, once again, that I write mostly about my characters way of thinking. You'll notice this habit of mine in this chapter
~. . .~ means talking in Elfish (also in later chapters, as it is not used in this one)
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It's all in the soul
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Chapter 6: Thoughts and doubts
__________________________
Elrond walked back to the dining hall. He had been frightened, really frightened. Actually, frightened wasn't the word for it. He had been terrified that his Little Dreamer would get hurt. He truly had not expected her to run from the dining hall. And so he realised something. He did not know his daughter at all. Someone else had raised her and shaped her to his image. He had nothing to do with it. She was Catherine, not his Little Dreamer. For this reason he decided to call her Catherine from now on, until he got to know her, until she became /his/ daughter. It was but sheer luck that Legolas was there to save her. He reminded himself to thank Legolas in the future. This made him also think of other things. Had he not, many years ago, promised King Thranduil that his youngest daughter would marry his son? But that agreement had been made before she had fallen in her deep slumber. Now that she was awake again. . . .
He arrived at the dining hall, telling his guests that Catherine was in her room, not feeling well. They expressed their concerne, but soon continued their meal. He excused himself and went to the library. There he sat down at a desk, took out a scroll and ink, and started a letter. He wrote it in his own elegant style, and soon finished it. He called a servant and gave him the letter, telling him to sent it to Mirkwood. King Thranduil had to be notified of his daughter's awakening. He also reminded him of their agreement, while at the same time asking if it still stands, for many years have gone by and things change, do they not?
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Cat sat on her bed. The elven lord had taken her to her room, so she could take a nap, but she wasn't tired in the least. She had already slept so much lately. To sleep again would be folly. She was feeling very confused. Elrond -her father- had yelled at her. And she had yelled back. And she had cried. He had comforted. But it felt strange. No, she corrected herself. It was he who felt like a stranger. It was so confusing. In her heart she felt like she should know him, yet at the same time she felt she didn't know him at all. Elrond had frightened her so. . . The moment he yelled at her she was afraid. But she wouldn't show it, so she had covered it up by being angry. She hadn't thought of him as her father right then; she had thought of him as a leader who needed to be feared. He had been feared. By her.
She had to be honest to herself. She hadn't thought of Elrond as her father from the beginning. She constantly had to remind herself. Even he realised it somewhere in his heart, because he himself had reminded her that he was her father? Or perhaps he struggled himself not to forget that little fact. . . A shadow of a doubt started to fill her heart. What if Elrond decided he had enough of her? She knew nothing of the elf, she could not anticipate his reactions.
In the same way, she did not know Arwen, Elladan and Elrohir. With her mind she knew that they were her brothers and sister, but she didn't /know/ them. They were little more than names and faces to her. Yes, they had been kind, just like Elrond, but still. For all she knew it could have been an act.
She felt her throat constrict when she came to this conclusion. Fear gripped her heart more closely. The shadow of doubt became a land filled with darkness. She wanted to run, to scream, to break things, to hurt herself. . . She needed release of her feelings, but did not know how to do it. She stood up and started pacing, her thoughts becoming more and more frantic as her feelings of doubt and fear consumed her. Was it all an act? Were they, the elves, good, or were they bad? Her first impression of them had been such a good one. Her instincts had told her to trust them, but now these doubts, these doubts. . . What was she to do? Should she confront them? Would they hurt her if she confronted them? Or worse? Or was she wrong? Should she trust her first instinct? Perhaps she wasn't his daughter, but he had lied to her. But why would he do such a thing? Had he kidnapped her? But no, it couldn't be, could it? Arwen, Elrohir and Elladan seemed honest in their opinion that she was their sister. So no kidnapping. But still, how could she be sure that he really was her father? And what about her mother? She suddenly realised that she hadn't even thought about asking about her mother. Why was she not here? Was she dead, injured? Had she gone on a trip? Did Elrond hurt her? If he did, would he hurt her also? Why hadn't he mentioned her? Where was she?
She felt her knees buckle beneath her, and moved quickly towards her bid to sit on it. How naïef she had been. How trusting. She should have known better than that. How often had she not seen on the news how a seemingly nice guy had murdered his friend? Or his children? His wife? How many times had she not read about child abuse? How often had she been warned not to trust strangers? But were they really strangers?
She was starting to panick, and she knew it. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, but it didn't really help. She was so afraid, she held so many doubts. A confrontation with Elrond would help her get the answers she wanted, but she was too afraid to confront him. So she gave in into another way of expressoin. She decided to run. She got up and peered around the door to look if there were any elves in the hallway. She saw none. As silently as possible, she ran through the hallway. Then she thought of something. What if she would be attacked again? She was unarmed! She crept from room to room, searching for a weapon when she saw two daggers lying on a nightstand.She peered further in the room and saw that there was an elf sleeping.To take those daggers would be risky. . . She slowly crept into the room and took the daggers. Then she swiftly turned around and ran silently away. She managed to get outside without being seen. She saw the forest in front of her. And again she doubted. Perhaps she shouldn't run. But what to do then? Stay? What would happen then? Her fear made the decision for her. Without looking back she ran into the forest.
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Please review
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A.N. : Hi, it's me again, with another chapter. I just want to say I don't know any Elfish, Quenya or whatsoever. If anybody could give me the elfish translation of Little Dreamer, or something that would pass for it, then I would be very grateful. I would also like to point out, once again, that I write mostly about my characters way of thinking. You'll notice this habit of mine in this chapter
~. . .~ means talking in Elfish (also in later chapters, as it is not used in this one)
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
It's all in the soul
---------------------
Chapter 6: Thoughts and doubts
__________________________
Elrond walked back to the dining hall. He had been frightened, really frightened. Actually, frightened wasn't the word for it. He had been terrified that his Little Dreamer would get hurt. He truly had not expected her to run from the dining hall. And so he realised something. He did not know his daughter at all. Someone else had raised her and shaped her to his image. He had nothing to do with it. She was Catherine, not his Little Dreamer. For this reason he decided to call her Catherine from now on, until he got to know her, until she became /his/ daughter. It was but sheer luck that Legolas was there to save her. He reminded himself to thank Legolas in the future. This made him also think of other things. Had he not, many years ago, promised King Thranduil that his youngest daughter would marry his son? But that agreement had been made before she had fallen in her deep slumber. Now that she was awake again. . . .
He arrived at the dining hall, telling his guests that Catherine was in her room, not feeling well. They expressed their concerne, but soon continued their meal. He excused himself and went to the library. There he sat down at a desk, took out a scroll and ink, and started a letter. He wrote it in his own elegant style, and soon finished it. He called a servant and gave him the letter, telling him to sent it to Mirkwood. King Thranduil had to be notified of his daughter's awakening. He also reminded him of their agreement, while at the same time asking if it still stands, for many years have gone by and things change, do they not?
**************
Cat sat on her bed. The elven lord had taken her to her room, so she could take a nap, but she wasn't tired in the least. She had already slept so much lately. To sleep again would be folly. She was feeling very confused. Elrond -her father- had yelled at her. And she had yelled back. And she had cried. He had comforted. But it felt strange. No, she corrected herself. It was he who felt like a stranger. It was so confusing. In her heart she felt like she should know him, yet at the same time she felt she didn't know him at all. Elrond had frightened her so. . . The moment he yelled at her she was afraid. But she wouldn't show it, so she had covered it up by being angry. She hadn't thought of him as her father right then; she had thought of him as a leader who needed to be feared. He had been feared. By her.
She had to be honest to herself. She hadn't thought of Elrond as her father from the beginning. She constantly had to remind herself. Even he realised it somewhere in his heart, because he himself had reminded her that he was her father? Or perhaps he struggled himself not to forget that little fact. . . A shadow of a doubt started to fill her heart. What if Elrond decided he had enough of her? She knew nothing of the elf, she could not anticipate his reactions.
In the same way, she did not know Arwen, Elladan and Elrohir. With her mind she knew that they were her brothers and sister, but she didn't /know/ them. They were little more than names and faces to her. Yes, they had been kind, just like Elrond, but still. For all she knew it could have been an act.
She felt her throat constrict when she came to this conclusion. Fear gripped her heart more closely. The shadow of doubt became a land filled with darkness. She wanted to run, to scream, to break things, to hurt herself. . . She needed release of her feelings, but did not know how to do it. She stood up and started pacing, her thoughts becoming more and more frantic as her feelings of doubt and fear consumed her. Was it all an act? Were they, the elves, good, or were they bad? Her first impression of them had been such a good one. Her instincts had told her to trust them, but now these doubts, these doubts. . . What was she to do? Should she confront them? Would they hurt her if she confronted them? Or worse? Or was she wrong? Should she trust her first instinct? Perhaps she wasn't his daughter, but he had lied to her. But why would he do such a thing? Had he kidnapped her? But no, it couldn't be, could it? Arwen, Elrohir and Elladan seemed honest in their opinion that she was their sister. So no kidnapping. But still, how could she be sure that he really was her father? And what about her mother? She suddenly realised that she hadn't even thought about asking about her mother. Why was she not here? Was she dead, injured? Had she gone on a trip? Did Elrond hurt her? If he did, would he hurt her also? Why hadn't he mentioned her? Where was she?
She felt her knees buckle beneath her, and moved quickly towards her bid to sit on it. How naïef she had been. How trusting. She should have known better than that. How often had she not seen on the news how a seemingly nice guy had murdered his friend? Or his children? His wife? How many times had she not read about child abuse? How often had she been warned not to trust strangers? But were they really strangers?
She was starting to panick, and she knew it. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, but it didn't really help. She was so afraid, she held so many doubts. A confrontation with Elrond would help her get the answers she wanted, but she was too afraid to confront him. So she gave in into another way of expressoin. She decided to run. She got up and peered around the door to look if there were any elves in the hallway. She saw none. As silently as possible, she ran through the hallway. Then she thought of something. What if she would be attacked again? She was unarmed! She crept from room to room, searching for a weapon when she saw two daggers lying on a nightstand.She peered further in the room and saw that there was an elf sleeping.To take those daggers would be risky. . . She slowly crept into the room and took the daggers. Then she swiftly turned around and ran silently away. She managed to get outside without being seen. She saw the forest in front of her. And again she doubted. Perhaps she shouldn't run. But what to do then? Stay? What would happen then? Her fear made the decision for her. Without looking back she ran into the forest.
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Please review
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