I don't own Degrassi
Author's note: This story is turning out to be a lot shorter than I had planned. The next three or four chapters will have several breakthroughs for Craig and Allegra, and I don't think Craig will be in Unit longer than two weeks.
I'm doing this for several reasons. I've long planned a sequel, and I'm excited to start on it. Also, My muse is making Craig better earlier than planned. Also, I've found this story is harder on me than I expected. I have to put my own mental health first, and so I'm wrapping things up soon.
Day eight
"Just one day." Craig said to Nora. "I would like to wake up on my own, without you standing over me."
"Then get better and get out of here," was her response. Craig sighed at that, he had a feeling he would never get better, even being here he was depressed sometimes. He just wished he knew why he was depressed all the time, even when things were going well for him.
Seth was in a good mood at breakfast, Craig noted, and asked him why.
"MY cousin's coming to visit today, I haven't seen him in two months-not since I got here.
Two months? Was Craig's only thought. Two months from now he'd be in school..he couldn't say here that long, could he?
Group was interesting that morning. Troy was bitching about something, Craig had learned to ignore his bitching, Laine had told him that Troy had come a day before Craig, over from the lock-down unit. He was one of the worst of all of them, and Craig alternated between feeling sorry for Troy and hating him.
It was pictionary day in group recreation, and Craig smiled as Allegra once again kicked ass. She was good at the game, and enjoyed it. It was one of the few times Craig saw a genuine smile on her face.
After lunch came Craig's session with Dr. Allen. "The more I think about it, the more I don't know why I cheated on Ashley. It was just so nice to be wanted by someone, that I lost track of things."
"Have you often felt unwanted?"
"When I lived with my dad, I did. Sometimes."
"So, do you think the memories caused you to cheat?"
"Maybe...yeah, probably." Craig looked at Dr. Allen. "Do you think this all goes back to my dad? Why I'm here?"
"Perhaps." At Craig's dirty look, Dr. Allen went on. "People who have been abused, particularly young people, tend to be the sort who go out looking for attention. As an example, most prostitutes were abused as children-sexualy more often then physically, but most abuse is the same."
Craig nodded. "My Mom was abused, she got married again and was happy...why was that?"
"Why do you think?"
"She was a strong person. Stronger than me..older than me, at least. with more experience but she was strong. I wish I was strong."
"You're going to be strong when you leave here, trust me Craig. Are you telling me you want to get better?"
"Yes, I want to get better."
"That's the first step. Tomorrow is the tests...I think you may have an illness that can be treated with medication. If that's true, I may let you leave within a week. Can you handle that? You're going to have to decide if you can handle leaving."
Craig nodded, then asked something that had been on his mind for most of the time he was there.
"Dr. Allen? I know you probably can't say much...but what's wrong with Allegra?"
"Allegra..is complicated. I can't say much, only that she's not quite what you think of her, what everyone thinks of her." A cryptic answer, but Craig expected as much.
They were making collages of things they loved in coping group. Craig found it enjoyable. He enjoyed looking through the things to find the perfect photo of a guitar to place on the collage. He caught the eye of Pattie, the therapist, and smiled. He felt better today, stronger. Maybe the sessions with Dr. Allen were helping.
After dinner Craig followed Allegra into her room. "Allegra why do you only talk in lyrics?"
" i was blessed with a birth and a death and I guess I just want some say in between" She said.
"Allegra, damnit, talk to me. I want to know about you. I don't know why, but I want to know what's wrong with you. Why you're here?"
"I'm here because I'm waiting it out for another two months until I'm 18 and can leave. I'm not crazy, I'm depressed. My Mom can't handle my illness, she sent me here. When I'm 18 I can check myself out and go live with my aunt like I want." Her voice was quiet, firm, truthful. Craig smiled at her.
"I see..."
"When are you getting out?"
"In the next week, Maybe. Dr. Allen's testing me tomorrow." Craig shrugged. "I don't want to hurt myself anymore..well, once in a while, but not usually. Being here helped."
"Because you know you aren't alone."
"Yeah...I'm shocked you spoke to me."
"I won't in public, you know that. I only speak to Dr. Allen and my aunt in talk, everyone else gets lyrics. But I feel for you. You're the only one here younger than I am. You don't want to be here-everyone else here but us checked themselves in, we were forced here."
"I'm glad I was forced here."
"I'm glad but not. I would have been fine as an outpatient. I'm OK, except for sometimes. I think we all get down. The thing about my meds is that they make me even-my downs are less down."
Craig nodded. "I'm going to go shower and get to bed."
"Night Craig."
"Goodnight Allegra" He waved good-bye and headed to his room to write in his journal.
Dear Journal-I'm getting better. I think that maybe Allegra is right, that knowing I'm not alone is what's helping. I'm going to be OK, I can feel it.
Lyrics used: Ani Difranco "Talk to me now"
Author's note: This story is turning out to be a lot shorter than I had planned. The next three or four chapters will have several breakthroughs for Craig and Allegra, and I don't think Craig will be in Unit longer than two weeks.
I'm doing this for several reasons. I've long planned a sequel, and I'm excited to start on it. Also, My muse is making Craig better earlier than planned. Also, I've found this story is harder on me than I expected. I have to put my own mental health first, and so I'm wrapping things up soon.
Day eight
"Just one day." Craig said to Nora. "I would like to wake up on my own, without you standing over me."
"Then get better and get out of here," was her response. Craig sighed at that, he had a feeling he would never get better, even being here he was depressed sometimes. He just wished he knew why he was depressed all the time, even when things were going well for him.
Seth was in a good mood at breakfast, Craig noted, and asked him why.
"MY cousin's coming to visit today, I haven't seen him in two months-not since I got here.
Two months? Was Craig's only thought. Two months from now he'd be in school..he couldn't say here that long, could he?
Group was interesting that morning. Troy was bitching about something, Craig had learned to ignore his bitching, Laine had told him that Troy had come a day before Craig, over from the lock-down unit. He was one of the worst of all of them, and Craig alternated between feeling sorry for Troy and hating him.
It was pictionary day in group recreation, and Craig smiled as Allegra once again kicked ass. She was good at the game, and enjoyed it. It was one of the few times Craig saw a genuine smile on her face.
After lunch came Craig's session with Dr. Allen. "The more I think about it, the more I don't know why I cheated on Ashley. It was just so nice to be wanted by someone, that I lost track of things."
"Have you often felt unwanted?"
"When I lived with my dad, I did. Sometimes."
"So, do you think the memories caused you to cheat?"
"Maybe...yeah, probably." Craig looked at Dr. Allen. "Do you think this all goes back to my dad? Why I'm here?"
"Perhaps." At Craig's dirty look, Dr. Allen went on. "People who have been abused, particularly young people, tend to be the sort who go out looking for attention. As an example, most prostitutes were abused as children-sexualy more often then physically, but most abuse is the same."
Craig nodded. "My Mom was abused, she got married again and was happy...why was that?"
"Why do you think?"
"She was a strong person. Stronger than me..older than me, at least. with more experience but she was strong. I wish I was strong."
"You're going to be strong when you leave here, trust me Craig. Are you telling me you want to get better?"
"Yes, I want to get better."
"That's the first step. Tomorrow is the tests...I think you may have an illness that can be treated with medication. If that's true, I may let you leave within a week. Can you handle that? You're going to have to decide if you can handle leaving."
Craig nodded, then asked something that had been on his mind for most of the time he was there.
"Dr. Allen? I know you probably can't say much...but what's wrong with Allegra?"
"Allegra..is complicated. I can't say much, only that she's not quite what you think of her, what everyone thinks of her." A cryptic answer, but Craig expected as much.
They were making collages of things they loved in coping group. Craig found it enjoyable. He enjoyed looking through the things to find the perfect photo of a guitar to place on the collage. He caught the eye of Pattie, the therapist, and smiled. He felt better today, stronger. Maybe the sessions with Dr. Allen were helping.
After dinner Craig followed Allegra into her room. "Allegra why do you only talk in lyrics?"
" i was blessed with a birth and a death and I guess I just want some say in between" She said.
"Allegra, damnit, talk to me. I want to know about you. I don't know why, but I want to know what's wrong with you. Why you're here?"
"I'm here because I'm waiting it out for another two months until I'm 18 and can leave. I'm not crazy, I'm depressed. My Mom can't handle my illness, she sent me here. When I'm 18 I can check myself out and go live with my aunt like I want." Her voice was quiet, firm, truthful. Craig smiled at her.
"I see..."
"When are you getting out?"
"In the next week, Maybe. Dr. Allen's testing me tomorrow." Craig shrugged. "I don't want to hurt myself anymore..well, once in a while, but not usually. Being here helped."
"Because you know you aren't alone."
"Yeah...I'm shocked you spoke to me."
"I won't in public, you know that. I only speak to Dr. Allen and my aunt in talk, everyone else gets lyrics. But I feel for you. You're the only one here younger than I am. You don't want to be here-everyone else here but us checked themselves in, we were forced here."
"I'm glad I was forced here."
"I'm glad but not. I would have been fine as an outpatient. I'm OK, except for sometimes. I think we all get down. The thing about my meds is that they make me even-my downs are less down."
Craig nodded. "I'm going to go shower and get to bed."
"Night Craig."
"Goodnight Allegra" He waved good-bye and headed to his room to write in his journal.
Dear Journal-I'm getting better. I think that maybe Allegra is right, that knowing I'm not alone is what's helping. I'm going to be OK, I can feel it.
Lyrics used: Ani Difranco "Talk to me now"