Ok. Remember what i said about reviews earlier? FORGETS IT!!! I wanna finish posting this (and tyiping it, while we're at it). Don't get me wrong, i still want reviews. In face, i DEMAND you review!!!!

You know, it's been so long since i've seen Card Captors that i really COULDN'T remember the name of that boy who always makes up stories that sound true, and then his cousin drags him off. i'll get around to looking it up sometime. ...k, looked it up. his name's Zachary, right? i didn't see a picture of him, but it rings a bell. eh, well. here's the second installment! InuArcher--i couldn't have finished this without you! thanks for the review, Ashieyu! (even i have to admit that Kikyo's a bit of a bitch, but i still kinda like her).



DarkFlame136

Oh, btw: i spell Inuyasha's name a little differently when he "loses his humanity", so to speak.

*~Round II: Inuyasha vs. Kouga~*

*For some odd reason, the arena has turned into an LA/NY-type club, complete with disco-style floor, neon lights, a DJ and two full bars to accent the other concession stands. Some demons are even a little friendlier than usual, due to the all around party atmosphere and one too many frozen daiquiris. The mango-berry seems quite popular among the Inu types--even Sesshoumaru's been seen with a giant glass topped off with an umbrella. Actually, there has been several sighting of the Demon Lord of the East...sometimes in two places at once. Are the strobe lights and an abundance of "koolaid" responsible, or is something strange going on?*

Sairen, who's been on the dance floor from the start, keeps staring at the pocky line. Naraku, who, somehow or another, has been her dance partner for the majority of the time, finally says something.

"If you're hungry, just say so!"

She looks back at him. "How did you know this song's by OK GO?" (btw, "Get Over It" is currently playing)

He rolls his eyes. 'Good grief, either she's playing around or she really CAN'T hear me too well.'

"Sairen, do you want to get some pocky?"

"Huh, what? Oh, you want a new body? I think that one's fine as it is; if you're tired, though just sit down!"

Naraku stops dancing. "Who said anything about being tired?"

Someone bumps him from behind. Naraku elbows him back.

"Hey! quit shoving!" a tall guy with spiked hair wearing a white outfit with the symbol for "Bad" on the back of his open shirt shouts over his shoulder.

"You started it, mortal."

Sanosuke turns around. "Wanna take this outside, punk?"

"Hmn." In a very Hiei-like gesture, Naraku turns around as if he's not worth the trouble. Then, via his insane speed, he spins around and shoves Sano hard enough to send him flying back into the crowd, mainly into Princess Ayeka.

"How rude!" she pushes him off in another direction.

Ryoko, always the party animal, suddenly shouts those two words any claustrophobic or "moral majority" person dreads to hear.

" M O S H P I T ! ! ! ! ! ! "

Total chaos erupts afterwards; heaven forbid you end up next to something with a lot of spines (aka: Seadra) or a super-strong demon (aka: Toguro).

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

That was the after party from Kikyo and Kagome's match. Tonight, most of the crowd is a bit subdued to begin with, there being more than a few hangovers, broken bones and whatnot. However, the show must go on!

*From The Box*

Mitsuno: *virtually unscathed beside a few broken nails* "Welcome back, everyone. 'glad you could all check out of the hospital to make it back after last night's wild ride."

Naraku: *looks like he's lost some sleep, sporting a black eye* "I have NEVER had a headache like that! No more of these 'after parties' for me!"

Sairen: *looks like she's ready to slap him five centuries into the future despite her own headache* "One must admit, that was QUITE the mosh pit you started!"

Naraku: "ME?! It was the silver-haired witch--"

Sairen: *places hot compress on head* "Whatever."

Mitsuno: "Any excuse to get away, neh?" *sly glance in their direction*

Naraku and Sairen: "WHAT?!?"

Mitsuno: *evil leer* "I saw how close you two were! And you DID leave at the same time--"

Sairen: "Damn your eyes!"

Naraku: "Silence your lying tongue, wench!"

Mitsuno: ~_^

Naraku: "And YOU!" *turns on Sairen* "You still haven't answered my question--why the hell were you staring at the pocky line?"

Sairen: "I thought I saw Sesshoumaru."

Mitsuno: "Yeah, he's quite the hottie..." *starts drooling*

Naraku: "Ewww...."

Sairen: "No, I mean, I thought I saw him twice in the same line!"

Naraku: "So? He loves that stuff."

Sairen: "Enough to put on a different outfit before getting back in line? This is Sesshoumaru we're talking about here!"

Mitsuno: "She's right. Since when does he go for seconds to begin with?"

Naraku: "Hmn..." *shrugs, then winces in pain* "Dammit; I forgot that shoulder was dislocated not too long ago!"

Sairen: *glances curiously at right shoulder, then pokes him without mercy*

Naraku: *various exclamations of pain* "Damn you, woman! OUCH!"

Sairen: ^___^

Mitsuno: *sigh* "Tonight our favorite hanyou gets to work out some long pent-up aggression against one of his comrades."

Sairen: *still poking Naraku* "And to make matters worse--or better, by our standards--Kouga's still trying to win Kagome over!"

Naraku: "Well, he IS the better dancer--that's IT" *turns and bites Sairen*

Sairen: "OUCHIES!!" *examines finger* "Bitch!" *bites him back*

Naraku: "OW!" *releases poison*

Sairen: *gags and runs to brush teeth*

Mitsuno: "Oh, that's just great! Now who's gonna be my co-commentator?"

*Naraku slowly gets up and starts to leave*

Mitsuno: "Not so fast..."

Naraku: "I'm just the VIP!"

Mitsuno: --, _ --, "Siddown."

Naraku: *afraid for his life* "Yes, ma'am."

Mitsuno: "Besides, it's just temporary. She'll be back soon. I guess. Oh, well. Naraku, you introduce the first guy."

Naraku: "Fine." *talks into mike* "He's half-human, half-witted, and half-mad for that human wench from another time despite that he's over fifty years out of her league!"

Mitsuno: -_-;;

Naraku: "Here in a display of male-Inu possessiveness, he's gonna rip out Kouga's heart and eat it for lunch with a side-salad. Inuyasha, get out here and show that wolf who the alpha-male is in this pack!"

Mitsuno: *nods in appreciation* "Not bad. Not bad at all."

Naraku: "I try."

*Inuyasha comes strutting out in time with "Headstrong", sporting a look of absolute confidence.*

Kagome: "Wow. He's really gonna do this, isn't he?"

Sango: "You ARE pretty popular with the guys, Kagome."

*Once in the ring, Inuyasha borrows Dairen's headset*

Dairen: *really DOES have one hell of a hangover* "Oi! What the devil...?"

Inuyasha: "It ain't like you're using it, anyway." *yells into mike on headset* "KOUGA! YOU MIGHT COME RUNNING UP HERE, BUT YOU'RE GONNA LEAVE ON A STRETCHER!" *looks right into Kagome's eyes* *a bit softer* "Kagome...this one's for you."

Mitsuno: "Aww...he even dedicated the match!"

Naraku: "..."

Mitsuno: "Despite that wolves prey on the weak, this one's has his work cut-out for him tonight, though he insists that the reward will be well worth it." *mutters* "This guy's a chick-magnet; why can't he just find someone else and let Inuyasha have Kagome?"

Naraku: "Mitsuno, you're mike's still on."

Mitsuno: o.o() "Oopers! Oh, well. C'mon out, Kouga, you sexy bitch!"

*In the entrance to the arena, Kouga raises an eyebrow*

Kouga: *sigh* "Good grief."

*The second Kouga comes out to his song ("Wolves"), he practically gets bum-rushed by a mass of fan girls*

Fangirls: "EEEEE!!!! KOUGA!!!"

Kouga: O.o;;;

Dairen: *sitting cross-legged in the middle of the ring, head in his hands* *full British accent coming out* "Aye! Quit the damn screamin', for crying out loud, I got a headache like a bitch, that I do!"

Mitsuno: "What the hell? Security!"

Naraku: *totally off-topic* "I didn't know he had an accent. Where's it from?"

*Shalmar and Saiyan rush over; the former uses her brother's Chain whip to keep everyone at bay while the latter drags Kouga out of the fray* (DarkFlame136: "Cool, I rhymed!")

*Saiyan unceremoniously deposits the poor wolf-demon inside the ring*

Kouga: (( @_@ ))

Inuyasha: ^______________^ "If he can't handle a bunch of screaming teenage girls, there's no way in hell he can expect to defeat ME!"

*Kouga's eyes stop spinning; glares dangerously at Inuyasha*

Kouga: "Then lose the Tetsuaiga and face me like a true male-Inu, coward!" *suddenly looks apologetic* "Oh, wait, that's right--you're NOT a true Inu, dog-turd!"

Inuyasha: "Fine, stupid wolf, since you're not cool enough to use your stinking weapon, I'll fight you tooth and nail!" *takes off Tetsuaiga* "Um...who can I trust to hold this?"

*One thousand-too-many hands go up in the audience on the demon-side*

Inuyasha: "Yeah, right, do I look like an idiot to you?"

Kouga: "No comment."

*A medium-height girl with wavy blue hair and pale green-blue skin appears in the ring*

Sairen: "I'll be happy to take that off you, Inuyasha. And I can keep Sesshoumaru from getting hold of it!"

Sesshoumaru: *narrows eyes and tilts head up* "Hmn." *eats more pocky*

Naraku: "Oh, hell no! Don't give that to HER!"

Mitsuno: *annoyed eye twitch* "Give it a rest, you big chicken--it's not like she can use it, anyway!"

Inuyasha: *ignores everyone* "Aren't you one of the hosts?"

*Sairen does a sweeping bow*

Sairen: "Co-host/commentator, to be exact."

Miroku: *in audience* "She's pretty cute, too."

Sango: -_p

Miroku: "But she's not cuter than you, Sango!" *nervous chuckle*

Sango: *satisfied* "That's what I thought you said."

Inuyasha: "Feh. Here, take it." *hands Tetsuaiga to Sairen, who grins in Naraku's direction*

Naraku: *a little worried, but still looks smug* "That's ok. Like Mitsuno said, she can't use it."

*Sairen takes the sword out of the scabbard, and it ain't the rusty version that emerges*

Sairen: "Sweet!" *swings giant fang around*

Sesshoumaru: *a mixture of surprise, annoyance, and worry* "Doesn't she know that the sword can slay a thousand demons in one swing?"

Jaken: *always the butt-kisser* "Not to fear, Lord Sesshoumaru; there's no way she can figure out how to use it properly if that half-breed cannot!"

SWOOSH!!! a giant wave of destruction spreads out from the sword towards the demon side of the audience.

*various screams and curses of the dying follow*

Sairen: "That is SO cool!"

Naraku: "I'll be damned..." *hides under chair*

Rin: *next to Sesshoumaru* "Haha, Jaken not as smart as he thinks he is! Sairen-sama's Air Elemental; Wind Scar easy to see!"

Jaken: "What? Ha!--I am ten times more intelligent than you will EVER be, girl!"

Sesshoumaru: *mutters* "I beg to differ."

*Sairen, in the meantime, skips off with the Tetsuaiga to The Box*

Sairen: "Mitsu, Naraku, lookie what I've got!"

Naraku: O.O

*in the ring, Dairen tries his best to be a ref and deal with his monster hangover at the same time*

Dairen: *still has true accent* "Ok, so I guess you ladies are opting for no weapons other than your own abilities. Oi! Wolf boy--lose the Shitt-on shards!"

Kouga: "That's Shikon, imbecile!" *does a double-take* "How the hell did you know I had any on me?"

Dairen: "I can see riiiiiite through you." *gets up, wincing* And damn, it ain't pretty!"

*Kouga mutters a variety of swears while removing the shards*

Kouga: "Here, take them." *holds out hand with shards*

Dairen: *eyes them warily* "I ain't touchin' THAT!"

Mitsuno: *exasperated sigh* "For crying out loud, you wuss, take the damn shards so we can get ON with it!"

Dairen: "Fine, then, woman." *uses telekinesis to move the shards out of his hand and practically throws them in Mitsuno's face* "YOU hold onto them; the way I'm feeling right now, I'll probably do something I won't regret later."

Mitsuno: -_-o *catches them* "Very well." *mutters* "Ingrate."

Dairen: "Is you two blokes ready?"

*Kouga and Inuyasha both nod*

Dairen: "Good."

*Inuyasha and Kouga take a fighting stance as Dairen gets out of the way. He stops*

Dairen: "One small thing: keep your claws and your teeth to yourselves, mind you. I'd hate to have to bite back. Like the key chain says: " 'Why am I so thirsty now when I drank so much last night?' "

*Both of them stare at him while he disappears to the far side of the ring*

Inuyasha: *to Kouga* "Is he REALLY a vampire?"

Kouga: *to Inuyasha* "He smells strange. Like...like....like something ancient and powerful, yet controlled."

Dairen: "Where I come from, we call it Old Spice." *hops on ropes* "This ain't no dog show, you two, so don't worry about breaking a nail."

*At the snap of his fingers, they attack*

Sairen: "Looks like this might literally be a dogfight, folks. Inuyasha and Kouga have locked arms in one of those wrestling matches of brute strength."

Mitsuno: "But what's this? Kouga appears to be attempting to do-see-do with his opponent!"

Naraku: "No, you idiot, he's trying to unbalance him."

*Sairen gives him a warning poke with the Tetsuaiga*

Sairen: "There will be none of that, there won't."

Mitsuno: "Sairen, I know we're hosting people from the past, but what's with the Kenshin lingo?"

*from the audience*

Sanosuke: *arm in sling and a bandage around his head* "Yeah; why IS she talking like Kenshin? Maybe it's the sword..."

Kaoru: "No way--his sword's a reversed blade. Maybe he's just set some kind of trend..."

Kenshin: "Oro? Me? Set a trend?"

Yahiko: "You gotta admit, there's been a crap-load of people who have used the name Battousai for their own ends."

Kenshin: *thinks for a sec* "You might be right. Personally, I think she's just seen too many episodes of the show, but she's doing a good job, that she is!"

*the rest of the cast falls over anime-style*

Sairen: ;)

*in the ring*

Inuyasha: *yelps in pain* "Oi! You're one lousy dance-partner. How many times did you step on Kagome's feet?"

Kouga: "I'm doing it on purpose, moron." *He knees Inuyasha in the...well, you know*

Inuyasha: X_X *doubles over*

Naraku: *winces* "Ouch; that's gotta hurt ten times more than it looked."

Sesshoumaru: *smiles slightly* "I wonder what his voice sounds like?"

*Inuyasha straightens up*

Mitsuno: "Wow, this guy must have balls of steel!"

Sairen: "Mitsuno..." -_-o

Mitsuno: "What? Most guys would still be on the ground after that!"

Sairen: "I guess that's why Kouga looks a bit nervous."

*For a moment, Inuyasha just stands there. Then he smiles*

Inuyasha: "Hmn." *rushes and knees Kouga twice as hard in the same spot*

Kouga: (( O.O )) *squeeks* "Dammit!" *curles up on the floor*

Mitsuno, Sairen and Naraku: "HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!"

Dairen: "This ain't no damn Rochembeau! Foul!"

Inuyasha: *slightly high-pitched voice* "What? He started it!"

Sairen: *still laughing* "Did he just foul Inuyasha?"

Mitsuno: *wipes eyes* "I think so."

Naraku: *recovering* "Wh--HAHA! what's a foul mean?"

Dairen: "A fighter can get up to three fouls before the stupid bloke gets disqualified."

Inuyasha: "That's insane!"

Dairen: "So is getting fouled three times in one match, Fuzzy."

Mitsuno: "Um, Dairen...shouldn't you be doing something?"

Dairen: "I can't take a cold shower here! What? Oh, um, that." *starts countdown*

"One..."

Kouga: *big struggle to talk* "I thought he was fouled!"

Dairen: "...two...buckle my shoe..."

Mitsuno: "What is this moron doing?"

Dairen: "...three...four...man, when WAS the last time I scored?"

Mitsuno: "Dairen, stop screwing around and get on with it!" *realizes what she just said* "And don't take that out of context!"

Sairen: "Hold on, Dairen--I think he's getting up!"

Kouga: *somehow manages to stand* "I'm not out of this yet!" *grabs throat* "My voice! I sound like a schoolgirl!"

Kagome, Inner Sailor Senshi, Sakura, Mei Lynn, Hitomi, Akane, and all other school-age chicks from anime: "Hey! I resemble that!!"

Kouga: "You'll pay for this, dog-face!" *Kouga takes a running start at Inuyasha, then jumps in the air*

Inuyasha: "So, you're ready for more, neh? Iron Reaper Soul Stealer!"

*Attack barely misses Kouga, who does a mid-air spin to avoid it*

Sairen: "Kouga barely misses getting nailed by one of Inuyasha's special attacks!"

Dairen: *sniff, sniff* "I smell blood. And it's making me thirsty."

Mitsuno: "Uh, oh. I guess Kouga got grazed."

*Kouga lands on his feet and wipes off his cheek, which indeed had a scratch that bled a little*

Kouga: "Ha! 'Tis a flesh wound!"

Sairen: *sighs* "Too much Monty Python..."

Inuyasha: "Ha. You're not even going to HAVE any flesh after this next one!" *gears up for another Iron Reaper*

Kouga: "Oh, s**t!"

Dairen: "Oi, me virgin ears! Foul, bitch!"

Kouga: "WHAT?!?"

Inuyasha: ^__________________^

Dairen: "Hey, this fic's PG-13. Watch your damn language, neh?"

*Kouga growls in response*

Naraku: "Well, now, looks like both fighters have racked up a foul."

Kouga: "That's so stupid! How am I going to get fouled for one word when this guy *points at the referee* practically has Turrets?"

Inuyasha: "Turrets? Is that contagious?"

Naraku: *curious* "I wonder...does this illness cause horrible deformations?"

Sairen: "Why? Need a new look, Naraku?"

Mitsuno: "Ouch, touché!! Seriously, though, for all you non-Rhodes Scholars--Turrets is a syndrome where the person who has it suddenly begins cursing out of nowhere, seemingly without control. At least, that's what I've heard..."

*looks up to Rurouni Kenshin section and sees Megumi, who's leafing through medical terminology book*

Megumi: *finds page* "Looks about right to me."

Sairen: *nods head* "Yup, that sounds like our Dairen, only his case is self-inflicted."

Mitsuno: "If I didn't know any better, I'd say that Saiyan's bipolar, since he's so nice one minute, but he'd kill you the next."

Naraku: *feeling out-of-the-loop, yet tries to play it off* "Can we skip the MCAT review and get back to the fight?"

Sairen: "Yeah, we know. But if Inuyasha's claws find their target, we can still have that lesson on anatomy!"

*Sailor Moon benches*

Rei: "See, Ami-chan, I TOLD you these fights are educational!"

Mikako: "Uh, huh!" *grabs more popcorn* "Hey, wolf-guy! Swing that half-demon by the sideburns!"

Kouga: *has been successfully sidestepping Inuyasha's attacks* "Hmn...that ain't a bad idea!"

Inuyasha: "It's about time you stopped running like a coward!"

Kouga: "Running?" *laughs* "I've been stepping a few inches to the side! Your aim sucks! It's like you're cross-eyed or something!"

Sairen, Mitsuno & Naraku: *rolling on floor laughing*

*Inuyasha's totally blind-sided by that one*

Inuyasha: "Wha--WHAT?"

Kouga: "You're attacks are no where near my vital points. A blind marksman has more depth-perception than you! The only reason you EVER got anywhere in a fight against me was because of the Tetsuaiga!"

Inuyasha (and a very ticked-off one at that): "At least I actually DRAW my friggen weapon, Kouga!"

Kouga: *didn't see that coming* "I--I just don't like wasting it on mutts like you! Yeah, that's it!"

Naraku: *shakes head* "That lying dog...he couldn't lift that blade if his life depended on it. I'm willing to bet he doesn't even HAVE a sword inside the sheath!"

Mitsuno: "I guess we'll just have to wait and see about that one." *stares at Inuyasha, who seems to be going through some sort of transformation*

Sairen: *notices what Mitsu's looking at* "Hey, how come his eyes are all red?"

Sesshoumaru: "This should be good for a laugh."

Jaken: "Lord Sesshoumaru--you NEVER laugh! Never mind smile, unless someone's going to die..."

Sesshoumaru: "My brother's demon side's getting the best of him. If the strain doesn't kill him, then that vampire in the ring probably will for security reasons."

Naraku: "Inuyasha's brain goes on total lock-down when he gets like this. He understands nothing except the most basic survival skills."

Sairen: "In English..."

Mitsuno: "All he knows is kill, eat, sleep, mate, repeat."

Sairen: *scratches head* "Isn't that all guys do, anyway?"

Mitsuno: *thinks for a sec* "Good point."

(DarkFlame: "hehe, lo siento, couldn't resist!!!" XD )

Kouga: *thinking* 'Crap, look what you've gotten yourself into this time. Stupid wolf, what now?'

Dairen: "Heh, I was about to ask you the same question."

Kouga: "What? You read minds?"

*a totally whacked-out Inuyasha does his signature one-hand knuckle crack*

Dairen: *notices* "I suggest you worry about that crazed youkai over there, mate. It's your fight, so it's YOUR job to make sure he doesn't go on a killing spree."

Kouga: *glances at Inuyasha's blood red eyes and deranged expression* *less-than-enthusiastic tone* "Great."

InuYasha: *growls* "Koooouuuuuggggaaaaa....." *his head slowly turns a full 360*

Mitsuno: *blinks* "¿Que el diablo....?"

Naraku: "Good God! He really IS possessed!"

Sairen: *takes a long, hard look at the bottle of sake she's been drinking* "Hmph." *pours the rest out*

Dairen: *rubs eyes* "Ye gods....Dairen, no more after-parties on work nights for you, buddy."

Kouga: "AAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!" *runs madly to the edge of ring and attempts to jump out, only to hit an invisible barrier*

"UMPH!" *slides down*

*in The Box, Sairen finishes up her containment spell*

Sairen: "There! That should prevent InuYasha from escaping until he gets it together!"

Mitsuno: "Uh, Sairen, you also locked Kouga and Dairen in with him."

Sairen: "Really?" *gets excited* "CAGE MATCH!!!!!!"

Naraku: "She has to be the only person capable of correctly executing a spell when totally hammered."

Sairen: "I'm not drunk. I only had half the bottle, and it was the only thing back here!"

Naraku: *mutters* "That's why I was trying to save it for later."

Dairen: *begins countdown* "One....toe, I mean, Two...."

Kouga: *raised head* "What are you counting for?"

Dairen: "Any time one of you hits the floor, I have to count, stupid. Five...."

Kouga: *dashes over and picks Dairen up by the shirt* "And what the hell happened to three and four?"

Dairen: "I counted it in my head. Now put me down before both of us lose ours!"

Mitsuno: "While Kouga was laying down on the job, InuYasha has taken to the offensive!"

Sairen: *Tsch* "InuYasha's the only one who HAS been doing any real offense!"

*Kouga senses a very irked demon heading towards him. Dairen uses his vampire speed to move to the opposite side of the ring while Kouga uses his own legs to get out of the way. However, youkai-mode InuYasha's twice as fast and manages to rake up Kouga's right shoulder*

Kouga: "AH! I guess his aim's improved somewhat in exchange for his intelligence."

InuYasha: *feral growl* *crouches on all fours*

Kouga: "What the...he looks like a common house dog! A very rabid common house dog." *he looks around for some kind of exit* "This barrier's gotta have some weak point." *a light bulb turns on over his head* "Hey..."

*Kouga does the unthinkable. Reaching down, he...*

Naraku: "Holy crap. He's gonna--"

Mitsuno: "--He's taking it off!"

Sairen: "No way!"

Dairen: "This could get quite ugly..." *keeps looking, anyway*

*Kouga takes off his sword*

(feh, what were YOU thinking?)

Kouga: *whistles* "Here, doggie, here, boy!"

Naraku: " 'the hell..."

Kouga: "See the stick? Nice stick, doggie...a nice stick of jerky!"

Mitsuno: "I think he hit your barrier too hard, Sairen. Kouga's officially lost it!"

Naraku: "Can't lose what you don't have, though I'm starting to wonder."

Sairen: "Well, whatever, InuYasha seems to be falling for it."

*a curious InuYasha cautiously advances towards Kouga's outstretched sword."

InuYasha: *sniffs scabbard*

Kouga: "That's it...nice jerky..." *thinks* 'At least the sheath's made out of cowhide! In his state, it's all beef to him!'

*InuYasah paws for it, much like a cat would a piece of yarn*

Kouga: "See? Good boy. You can have it if you go FETCH!" *Kouga reaches up and throws the sword. Immediately, InuYasha leaps after it and Kouga moves as far back as he can go*



Mitsuno: "And he pitches a fast one!"

Sairen: "But InuYasha's faster and he looks as if he'll catch it!"

Naraku: "Heh. He's gonna be pissed when he chips a tooth from gnawing on it."

*InuYasha bounds forward a bit, then jumps up and catches the sword in midair. Unfortunately, he's still moving forward when he does it.*

SMACK!! *~~FITZ, FITZ~~*

*all the lights in the stadium flash out for a few seconds, then flash back on, revealing dozens of guilty faces as people try to act like they weren't making out*

Dairen: "What? Sairen, I thought that was a containment barrier, not a big-ass bug zapper!"

Kouga: *feels his pupils contract from the lights coming back on* "ARGH! What happened?"

Dairen: *walks over to the charred mess on the floor* *Nudges it with toe* "Ewww....I don't even think a count is necessary for this one. Winner: Kouga!"

*cheers from the Kouga fans in the audience, while the Inuyasha fans demand an autopsy to make sure*

Sango: "Wow, who'd of thought Kouga could actually come up with something intelligent?"

Kagome: "Oh, my gosh. INUYASHA!!!!" *jumps out of seat, runs to ring*

Sesshoumaru: "He's dead, you know. I guess that means I get Tetsuaiga." *gets up*

Kagome: *somehow managed to pass through barrier* "He is NOT, Sesshoumaru! He's still breathing!"

Sesshoumaru, Naraku & Kouga: "Damn." *the last two snap their fingers in frustration. another type of snap comes from Inuyasha's older brother, along with a mysterious flash*

Dairen: "Hey! It's bright enough in here! Only the mortician's allowed to take pictures, anyway!"

Sesshoumaru: *smiles his little smile while pushing a few buttons on a digital camera* "Just think of me as his assistant." *walks away*

Naraku: "If you print it, save me a copy! And make it wall-sized!"

*Sairen and Mitsuno go through the barrier; Naraku tries to follow, but cannot pass*

WHAM!

Naraku: Oo;;; "...Ouch..."

*While Mitsuno chats with Kouga, Sairen takes a look at Inuyasha*

Mitsuno: "Wow, Kouga, that was some quick thinking. Please, would you tell the house how you came up with that brilliant scheme?"

Kouga: *blushes* "Um, actually, I was hoping the sword would cause enough of a distraction so I could find a way out of here. Or he'd ruin his teeth from chewing on it so he couldn't bite me if worse came to worse."

Mitsuno: *blink, blink* "...Nani? Are you trying to say that putting InuYasha out of commission was a fluke?"

Kouga: *embarrassed laugh* "I guess so."

Mitsuno: -_-;; "Sairen, how's the hanyou?"

Sairen: "Still alive. Somehow."

Kagome: *pretty much hysterical* "Inuyasha! He needs medical attention!"

Sairen: "He needs a therapist for his mood-swings." *Heals him, anyway*

Kouga: "Hmn. Don't waste your time on him."

Fangirls: "EEEEE!!!!! WE LOVE YOU, KOUGA!!!!"

Kouga: *blows kisses*

*While waving to the crowd, Kouga exits the ring. Or tries to, anyway, since he forgot one little thing*

~*~WHAM!!!~*~

*In a very Kenshin-like manner, Kouga's sprawled out on the floor with his eyes spinning wildly*

Kouga: @_@' '

Sairen: "Oopers, forgot about that!" *takes down barrier*

"Kagome, just make sure he doesn't try getting up for a day or so, and he'll be fine."

Naraku: *still on floor, rubbing his sore nose* "And you didn't just let him die because...?"

Sairen: "I don't feel like chasing off carrion birds. Or the majority of the demon-side of the audience."

*tosses Tetsuaiga to Kagome* "Give this to him when he's back on his feet. The energy of the barrier should have shocked his senses back."

Kagome: "But what if he's still in demon-mode?"

Sairen: *shrugs* "Kill him."

Mitsuno: "I guess that wraps things up for this one. Next time:" *pauses* "Sairen, you've got the list. Who's next?"

Sairen: *rummages through pocket and pulls out black piece of paper* "Looks like Rin's gonna take on that toad, Jaken."

Mitsuno: "Huh? Does Sesshoumaru know about this?"

Sesshoumaru: *matter-of-factly* "I am the one Rin asked to write her up."

Jaken: "Say WHAT?"

Rin: *jumps up and down* "Yay, Rin fight next!"

Sairen: "No more mass moshes or fights until then, people!" *holds head in rememberance*

Mitsuno: "Hasta luego!"