Anime GrudgeMatch 2003

by DarkFlame136

ever wonder what would happen if one character could vent their spleen about how much another gets on their nerves? here's one rendition, and nothing's between the contenders besides a lenient referee and the air that one won't breath for much longer.

7. Round IV, Part I: Sesshoumaru vsYue!

Hiya, peoples. Thank you all for the reviews (and the wait); i'm glad you enjoy this inspired yet insane fanfiction :)
This chapter actually started in Round II. What the hell am i talking about? Remember in Round II when Naraku and Mitsuno thought Sairen was losing it because she said she saw Sesshoumaru in the pocky line twice? And in Round III, we finally found out what in the world was going on. See, i AM capable of a complex plot! (and that's all the plot this story's getting, Archangel38, except for the little twist that comes at Round VI. So don't hurt me!)
i guess one can call this Round the climax, for you literary buffs. For all of you who just like a good fanfic, i guess one can call this the next installment. A warning, though: it has a few more "foreign frazes", if you get my drift, so if you don't like too much cursing, skip this one. Although between this and the next chapter, i might have to bump up the rating ^_^o.
DarkFlame136

Hotaru-chan, Meilisa-chan...Guess who's making a guest appearance?
Happy (much belated) Birthday! ^_^ o
…and Merry Christmas to 'yas!

…and Happy New Year! *sigh* 'took WAY too long to write this *bleep*

*glares at Rashim, who still has the censor button*

Ps: anyone reading this from Boston? i put a lil' somethin' in here just for you people, since i happened to be at school there during the time when…well, you'll know the part when you see it =^_^=

Small note--in this fic, for the sake of simplicity, Sesshoumaru has both arms functioning, Sakura has passed the Final Judgement yet all the cards are still Clow, and Reed himself is an adult while Kero is in his dollie form since Cerberus couldn't get past security ^^;;.

~*~Round IV: Sesshoumaru vs....Yue?!~*~

*Arena shot. The place is NOT what it used to be. The roof, for starters, looks like the top of a convertible, and not without reason. Also, since most of the seats had either fire and/or water damage, all of the interior had a serious makeover. One of the walls on the side seating the human audience--possibly the one Kagome made an impression in during Round I--had been knocked out to create a dining area surrounded by the food stations/booths, kinda like at the food court in a mall. Not only was it a good idea, but it would also take care of the various vendor complaints (I.e. magic arrows killing their chefs, their stand being burned, etc. etc.). As for the audience seating area…the aisles have these nifty row lights (think airplane floor) and the chairs were reupholstered with red, black and royal blue cushioning since Mitsuno, DarkFlame, and Sairen couldn't agree on one color. Also equipped into the arms of the chairs was a miniature computer pad used for things such as voting on who the guest referee would be for the next round =^_^= *

Sairen and Mitsuno, fresh from the dining area, are talking excitedly on their way back to The Box, a silent Naraku following. The two Elementals suddenly spot a Mysterious announcer dude.

Mysterious announcer dude: *mysterious voice* "On our last episode of Anime GrudgeMatch 2003, Sesshoumaru, Inu Demon Lord of the West, challenged Yue of the Moon, the former Judge of the Cards, to a match. Obviously, this challenge has been accepted; otherwise, we wouldn't be here right now."
"Now, after one pocky booth, two rounds of confusion, and countless insults, the time has finally come for these two enigmas to battle it out over which one of them deserves to walk around looking that gorgeous."

They stop dead in their tracks, causing Naraku, who stopped by the Cinnabon before catching up with the girls, to slam right into them and get a face full of frosting and cinnamon.

"Dude! It's a Mysterious announcer dude!"

Mitsuno points accusingly at the guy in the trench coat. "What the hell are you doing over here? WE'RE the hosts of this show!"

The announcer looks nervous. "I was just...like, you know...creating an atmosphere!"

"I'll show you atmosphere!" Sairen creates and unleashes a giant whirlwind.

Mitsuno, knowing how eccentric her best friend can get, jumps back at least twelve feet. "Naraku! You might want to get back here where it's kinda safe!"

Naraku's wiping the icing from off his nose and licking his fingers. "Where it's 'KINDA' safe?"

Mitsuno shrugs. "As long as she doesn't have to chase him around with that thing, we should be OK over here."

The tornado moves towards the announcer, who freezes in terror.

Scared shitless announcer dude: O,O;;

Finally finding his legs, he hauls ass out of the area.

"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! YOU CRAZY BITCH!!!!!!"

He does not get very far before the whirlwind sucks him up, trench coat and all.

"STAY THE HELL OUT OF OUR BOX, YOU POSER!!!" Sairen shouts after the storm, which makes its way back up the aisle (Naraku and Mitsuno jump out of the way just in time).

Saiyan and Dairen, both on security duty, are still taking tickets at the door at the end of the aisle. Mitsuno sees them and shouts a warning. "Hey, guys! Down in front!"

"What? I can't hear you over the noise!" Saiyan shouts back down before really thinking about it. "Well, I CAN, but I CAN'T, you know?" he glances over in Mitsuno's direction, "But I definitely cannot see you because of that stupid whirlwind in the aisle."

Dairen's head whips up. "What did you say?" he turns his head. "HOLY, SHIT!"

"Um..." Saiyan yells out the door, "Everyone who's still outside--"

"GET THE FU*K OUT THE WAY!!!!" Dairen screams, grabbing his brother and diving to the side right as the storm reaches them. Full of sound and furry (along with the announcer and any other stray people it picked up on the way), Sairen's tornado blows out the door. Outside, one can hear a number of beings cursing and scattering to avoid being sucked in.

Demon hanging on to lamp post: *screams over wind* "Why can't I ever come here without something going wrong?"

Human hanging on to demon hanging on to lamp post: *yells back* "I've barely recovered from the mosh pit myself, AND I have a second degree burn from last night's fiasco!"

Once Mitsuno and Naraku get to The Box, and everyone (not blown away) returned to their seats, the former and Sairen get this party started, 'yo. Lol.

Mitsuno: ¡ y bienvenidos otra vez! Anoche, tenemos una sopresa para Ustedes!

*Saiyan, Dairen and a few helpers hold giant cue cards in front of the audience sections*

cue cards: "And welcome once again! Tonight, we have a surprise for you!"

*written in smaller script underneath the translation on Saiyan's card* 'hopefully it's the rest of this fic being in English'

*snickers from the demon side*

Mitsuno: "Hmn. 'wonder what's so funny?"

Sairen: *shrug* "They're demons--what do you expect? One of them probably farted or something."

Naraku: *makes face* "I resent that."

Sairen: " 'don't see why; you're all gas, anyway."

Mitsuno: *Hurriedly* "Ok, people. You're all probably wondering why neither Saiyan nor Dairen are in the ring."

Sairen: "This is because we have a guest referee tonight!"

*from Tenchi cast seats*

Washu: "A HAH! I KNEW that rumor of an audience poll before the show wasn't just gossip!"

Sairen: "Right you are, Washu!" *reaches in bag off to the side and translocates her a kwaii chibi plushie of…well…herself*

Washu: "Oh, wow! I'm a chibi!" *cuddles* "Aren't I just adorable?"

Ryoko: *scratches head* "Whatever you say, hon."

Mitsuno: "Don't worry, folks. We have plushies of EVERYBODY…who guesses correctly, that is!"

Sairen: "Allrighty, then everyone. Time to cast your votes and win that adorable plushie of none other than you!"

Mitsuno: "Who is the next guest referee? Hotaru the Senshi of Destruction; Schezar the Manwhore of Gaea--"

Allen Schezar: "Hey!" *sulks* "I resemble that…"

Mitsuno: "--Satan Himself; or Dairen's patron saint, the Grim Reaper?"

Naraku: "Isn't Death yours as well?"

Sairen: *confused* "Huh? I thought hers was Dilandau?"

Mitsuno: "Nah. I changed it to Arucard after we watched Hellsing last week, remember?"

Sairen: "Doesn't he dress almost exactly like Vash the Stampede, complete with black and silver guns?"

Mitsuno: "Oi, chika. There's no WAY Vash could have had that look first. Arucard's been around for way longer!"

Vash: *tsch* "That just means he'll die first!"

Arucard: (from behind Vash) *emotionless grin* "Hmn. It's a little late for that, boy."

Vash: "…eep!" @_@

Naraku: "It's probably because he has a big hat."

Sairen: "Maybe…but D has a big hat AND he's a vampire. Maybe it's the hat AND the red trench coat…"

*from somewhere between the human and demon seating areas*

D's left hand: "See? I TOLD you you dress bad!"

D: "…"

Mitsuno: -_p "N-E-Way, start punchin' buttons, people. Those of you with the right idea will have your seat numbers highlighted on the computer screen." *jerks thumb over towards Shalmar and Rashim, who cheerfully wave back*

*meantime, the Jeopardy theme plays in the background as people key in their responses.*

Naruto: *panics* "I never WAS good at tests!" *tries peeking at Sakura's keypad*

Sakura: ¬ _¬ "…don't even think about it!!"

Naruto: *whines* "But I want a plushie so I can show everyone when I become Hokage!"

Sasuke: "Naruto. This is probably mostly about chance and/or luck. I can't even use Sharingan on this…"

Naruto: "Unless there are some people hidden in the audience who know the answer!" *jumps on top of chair and 'scouts' around*

Sakura & Sasuke: -_-;;

*end Jeopardy theme*

Rashim: *pushes buttons* "Well, let's see which seats to toss those plushies from hell to." *shudders* "Some likenesses should NOT be made into children's toys!"

Shalmar: "I'd still like to know how Sairen and Mitsuno knew which dolls to have made."

Naraku: "Yes..how DID you two figure that out?"

Mitsuno: "With a little help from the Time Card."

*flash to Card Captor Sakura section, where Li, like Naruto, has jumped on the top of his seat like some crazed schizoid neko*

Li: *shouting* "What did you say? That's impossible! I have that card right--" *goes in pockets only to find--* "What the hell?! a LOG?!?"

Sairen: =^_^= "Teeheehee…I love that jitsu!"

Madison: "But, how could they have released the magic? They're not guardians, and they don't seem to be related to Clow Reed…" *looks at Clow, who's just as confused*

Clow Reed: "I don't think we're related. Trust me, I'd know."

Mitsuno: "Well…we ARE the hosts."

Sairen: "And Elementals."

Mitsuno: "So in short, we can do whatever the hell we wanna!"

Sairen: *absently examines the Time Card from various angles* "Oh, the power…"

Mitsuno: "Speaking of which," *looks at newly installed screen in The Box* "translocate those plushies, Sairen. I'll read off the seat numbers and the names of the ones you pick out to make it easier."

Sairen: "Will do." *pulls out the entire bag of stuffed dolls* "Congrads to all you winners! You have been given immortality as a kwaii little dollie!"

Naraku: *mutters* "Or at least until an animal chews it up."

*she ignores him (as usual) and begins sending the dolls one by one to the people/seat numbers Mitsuno specifies. One of the sections to get a surprise was no other than the DBZ area*

Vegeta: *blinks as a plushie materializes in his lap* "Good GOD!"

Goku: *points and laughs* "HAHA! You're a cute little chibi doll!"

Bulma: *takes plushie and cuddles it* "Awww…it's so CUTE!"

Vegeta: *shudders* "Take it with my blessing! Just keep it away!"

*human side of the audience*

Jennifer V.: *chibi version of her pops out of the air in front of her* "MY plushie!!!!" *grabs doll*

Krystal P.: *yells* "Oi! Why the hell didn't I get one?

Mitsuno: *yells back* "You didn't even vote!"

Krystal: "WTF?!?!?!?! I WANT MY DAMN PLUSHIE!!!!" *cries*

Sairen: *huge sigh* " 'damn good thing someone DID see this coming!" *fishes through the bag for her doll and sends it to her*

Krystal: *jumps up and grabs chibi doll* "Yay!"

Mitsuno: "But…we didn't see her in the future the Time Card showed."

Sairen: "No…DarkFlame said to make her one, anyway, so we don't have to end up adding another fight to the roster."

(DarkFlame: lol. You two are on the same account, anyway, so I guess both of you win ^____________^ )

*Lupin III cast section, where everyone except Inspector Zenigata gets a dollie*

Goemon: "Hey, look…they even included my sword!" *pulls a rather sharp looking blade out of the little sheath* "Very detailed indeed."

Jigen: *laughs* "Yeah. Lupin's looks kinda goofy!"

Lupin: "Hey!" *smiles at his chibi doll* "I think he's quite handsome, thank you!"

Fujiko: *stares sideways at hers* "Are these things to scale or something? There's no way my boobs are THAT large!"

Lupin: *being the perv he is, he tries to literally reach out and touch someone* "That's the problem with dolls, Fujicakes. None of the parts are real--OW!"

Fujiko: *whacks him with her purse a second time* "Have you no public manners, Lupin?"

Zenigata: *sad* "That's not fair…how come THEY got a plushie?" *sniffle*

Goemon: "It's quite simple, really. Around here, the answer is probably the least probable, so two of the choices were knocked out automatically."

Jigen: "And that just left the ladies--I mean, the lady and the cross-dresser--I mean, *sigh* you know who the hell I'm talking about…Schaza…Scissor…Schizermynizzer…"

"S C H E Z A R ! ! !" someone screams from afar.

Jigen: "Yeah, that guy…" };)

Fujiko: "And since we already have two pretty boys in the ring, why would we add a third? They'd probably slaughter him and then there wouldn't even BE a referee!"

Zenigata: "I see…so that just leaves…"

Sairen: "Ladies and gents, boys and girls, we will now reveal the guest host for those of you who still don't get it! Give it up for the Senshi of Destruction herself--SAILOR SATURN!!!!"

*a techno version of "Saturn's theme" blasts on the speakers along with the cheers of the audience as Hotaru rises up through the floor of the ring amidst the smoke, strobe lights and a downright bitchin' laser show*

*Sailor Moon seats*

Rini: "Way to go, Hotaru!"

Rei: " 'Atta girl!"

Minako: "Yeah, Saturn! Don't take any shit from any of those incredibly hot, sexy…I mean…yeah…"

Makoto: *screams* "WOOOOOO!!!!! YANKEYS DOWN, COWBOY UP!"

Seiya: "Um…this isn't the game at Fenway, Makoto…"

Ami: "It's a little like the Red Sox games earlier this fall--"

Yaten: *tsch* "I don't see how, since this isn't baseball, Ami--"

Ami: *glares at him* "I was going to say it's because no matter what the outcome is, there's going to be two rabid, angry mobs of fans--one cheering and running around, the other destroying things, both screaming and flipping cars over."

Yaten: "Oh, no! My Porsche!" *runs out to save his precious car, though everyone knows he's more worried about his hair getting messed up*

Everyone elese: -_-;;

*on the demon side*

Random dissenter: "What? That little girl is the ref? What the hell is this, some kind of joke?"

*Saturn, from the ring, immediately picks out the unfortunate bigmouth and promptly disintegrates his ass*

Naraku: *whistles* "My kind of woman!"

Saturn: *turns towards him with an emotionless stare, then flips back her hair* "Hmn."

Sairen: "Buuuuuuuuuuurnnnnnnnnn…."

Mitsuno: O.o;; "…as much as I don't like saying this, let's not have any of THAT this time around."

Sairen: *blink, blink* "…you're a Fire Elemental. How can you NOT hope for a bonfire like last time?"

Mitsuno: *glares* "Because it's coming out of MY paycheck this time!"

Sairen & Naraku: "OOOOOOOHHHHHHH……."

Mitsuno: "So let's get this started already. Proving he has the capacity to show more than one disinterested expression, we had to keep this guy from sucker punching the challenger when passing him in the hall. Ladies and Gents and…"

*catches a glimpse of Kamlyn from the Inu Yasha section, along with the Sailor Stars*

*giant sweat drop* "…whatever else is out there…put 'em together for that O-So-Sexay Demon Lord of the West, Sesshoumaru!"

*our slightly frosty demon dog--surrounded by Jarga's guards--steps in lightly to the instrumental version of "Tamashii no Rufuran" (the one with the violins and the harp…*sighs* I love that version of "Soul's Refrain"!), which can barely be heard over the crazed screams of rabid fan girls. In fact, a group of them has managed to climb out of the stands and tries to bum rush the guards*

Sairen: "What the ::frig::?!? I thought we had the bars separating the walkway from the chairs electrified?"

Mitsuno: "We DO. Why in the nine hells they're not turned on is what I want to know!" *glares at Saiyan*

Saiyan: *glares right back at her* "I DID turn them on!"

Dairen: "I can't hear any electricity in them." *walks over to circuit box, tripping over something as soon as he gets over there* " 'the hell…" *looks down* "That's just sick!" *looks at open circuit box* "someone cut the wires to the electric bars!"

Sairen: "And it's sloppy…who would be dumb enough to leave the wire cutters over there and the box open?"

Blond fan girl: "Like, OMG! They found out! I told you they were, like, psychic or something!"

Red-haired fan girl: "Who cares?!" *turns around and gives a rather loud battle cry* "FLUFFY-SAMA!!!!!" *runs down the aisle*

*the rest of the group follows suit, adding their own high-pitched screams to the mix. However, Jarga's guards were ready for the little powder puffs. As soon as they were in range, the front two activated their nifty large, black shields with the sound waves that can take down just about anything*

*a noise like someone hammering a gong resonates through the air, where the sound waves can be seen floating towards the screaming preteens, then colliding with them, sending all seven of them flying backwards a good ten feet*

Group of not-so-rabid fan girls pilled up: ~~(( @v@ )) ~~

Blond fan girl: "…like…ouch…"

Naraku: *whistles* "Damn, they're good."

Mitsuno: *smiles* "That they are. I'm glad we DID decide to hire them!"

Sairen: "We couldn't have done it without you, Jarga!"

*Jarga, in full armor with an extremely confident smile of her own, gives a salute from the Wolf's Rain section*

Darcia III: *tsch* "Show-off…"

Jarga: *blows him a kiss* ~~SMOOCH!~~ ^_~

*back to The Box*

Sairen: "Ok, now for our next bishounen…also usually cold and disinterested, the challenger became quite heated over the situation in our last Round, and has accepted Sesshoumaru's invitation into the ring. Battling for the right to wear the face, hair, and aura of self-centeredness, let's make some noise for Judge Jud--er, former Judge…no, that's not right. Whatever--it's Yue, everybody!!"

Naraku: "Wow. Even I can't cover for that ::mess:: up!"

Sairen: -_p*

*as Sairen beats the crap outta Naraku, Yue, like Sesshoumaru, enters with his own entourage of Jarga's guards marching out along with him. Also like Sesshoumaru, he has chosen a song from Evangelion, his being the MIDI version of "Cruel Angel's Thesis". Despite the screaming fan girls, not one of them was brave enough to try bum-rushing him--whether out of fear for their health or fingernails and outfits is another story for another time.*

Saiyan: *aside to Dairen* "What the hell is this? MIDI day?"

Dairen: *shrugs* "Beats me. Personally, I thought one of them was coming in to "Too Sexy" !"

*Yue enters the ring, where Sesshoumaru is already standing with his arms folded*

Sesshoumaru: "Well, well. Glad you could pull yourself away from your dressing room mirror. It shall be a pleasure to punch in your pointed nose."

Yue: *glares* "Hmn. Big words for a color-blind dog with a tiny brain and no fashion sense, seeing that you are still attached to that giant pink feathery boa and tie-dye ribbon!"

Sesshoumaru: *smirk* "I would not talk about being color-blind if I were wearing green and red plaid boxers with a white outfit--"

*an indignant Yue looks down and pulls up his pants around the corner of his underwear showing*

"--and my style happens to be original. Unlike some people here, who can't even pick their own damn music!"

Yue: "Oh, go piss on a hydrant."

Sesshoumaru: "Bite my ass, mother f--"

Mitsuno: "Allright, everyone, let's just start this before the authoress has to raise the rating on this fic!"

Sairen: "Hotaru, when ever you're ready, hon."

*from The Ring, Sailor Saturn nods*

Saturn: "The rules of this match are simple. The first to die loses."

Yue: "Sounds simple enough."

Sesshoumaru: "I'm surprised you caught it, Scatterbrain of the Moon."

Yue: "Well…not quite. Would you like to go FETCH it for me?"

*Sesshoumaru moves to rip out his eyes, but Saturn blocks him with her scythe.*

Saturn: "I am not finished yet. Unlike the other matches, it is also an automatic loss to whoever has three fouls or stays out of the ring or on the ground for more than thirteen seconds."

Naraku: *frowning while trying to heal his many scratch wounds* "Why such an odd number?"

Saturn: *fixes her eyes on him* "Because I like it."

Naraku: *holds up his hands in truce, not wanting to get trounced by another chick* "Whatever you say, lady!"

Saturn: *turns back to the two bleached blonds in The Ring* "This one will be open-air as well, so you both should be able to use your full powers, if you decide to." *looks at Sesshoumaru* "Do you plan on transforming, Lord Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru: *thinks about it* "Hmn…I should not need to, but, just in case, I would like to keep the option open."

Yue: *without expression* "Chicken?"

Sesshoumaru: "I had an early breakfast and missed lunch. I am assuming that is exactly what you will taste like."

Saturn: "Very well then. Lord Yue, this gives you access to your full powers as well. Do you have all of the cards you require?"

*Yue pulls out a decent amount of Clow cards*

Yue: "Since the moon is full, I should be able to use my other powers in full as well."

Sesshoumaru: *thinks* Weren't those the same conditions when that female fourth grader kicked your sorry ass? *smirks*

Yue: *narrows eyes* "What's so funny?"

Sesshoumaru: *lies* "Nothing."

Saturn: "Now that we have established this…Shalmar, the ceiling!"

Shalmar: *lip-synching and jamming in her seat to "Owari nai Yume"*

Rashim: *rolls his eyes and lifts up one side of her headphones* "Oi, sis. Hit the button."

Shalmar: "Will do." *still jammin', she hits the button*

~~Whirr~~

*like the roof on a Cadillac, the ceiling of the arena recedes, exposing the dark, starry sky and a full, bright moon.*

Audience: "Oooohhhh!!!!! Aaaaahhhhh!!!!"

All wolves in the audience: "GROWWOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLL!!!!!"

Sairen: *sighs rubs her temples* "Ye gods…."

Naraku: *sighs as well* "Okami…go figure…"

Mitsuno: ¬ _¬ "…KNOCK IT OFF!!!!!"

*all howling stops, the only sound remaining is the chirping of crickets and some whimpering*

Toboe: *sniffle* "She didn't have to be mean about it…"

*next to him, Tsume shrugs as if to say, 'whatever'.*

Tsume: "Whatever."

*the ceiling stops moving* **CLANK!**

Saturn: *raises a hand* "Fighters…ready…"

*Yue and Sesshoumaru both tense, preparing for battle*

Saturn: *quickly brings down her hand* "IKKE!"

*she jumps out of the way seconds before the two rush forward and take a swipe at each other*

CLANG, CLANG, SWOOSH!

*a three second midair battle takes place, with no one seeing what happened except trained fighters/superhumans and the upper-middle- to higher-class demons. Just as quickly, the two fighters land on opposite sides of the ring in one of those cramped looking stances, and, for some odd reason to the untrained eye, the Senshi of Destruction is standing in the center, weapon upraised as if she had just used it*

Sasuke: *blinks his red eyes* "…damn…"

Most of the entire casts of Dragon Ball Z/GT and Yu-Yu Hakusho: "You said it!"

Mitsuno: "And, for those of you who blinked, Yue and Sesshoumaru have began to literally take a swipe at each other. Well, two each, actually, with the third strike belonging to Sailor Saturn."

Naraku: "What? I only saw the two…" *feels rather embarrassed, especially since he just unwittingly admitted it*

Saturn: *in her usual calm tone* "Sesshoumaru…foul. That counter was uncalled for, and you know it!"

*Sesshoumaru, not looking the least bit sorry, gets up and faces his opponent. The spike armor over his left shoulder suddenly cracks and falls apart*

Saturn: "Yue…pull up your pants and find something to keep them up."

*Yue, holding onto two scimitars, stands as well*

Yue: "What are you talking about? I blocked that--"

*a small rustling of fabric can be heard only by those with excellent hearing, though all could see Yue's fabled red and green plaid boxers*

Everyone except fangirls: "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!"

*meanwhile, the fan girls are all screaming their empty little heads off (lol) and some are even taking pictures*

Madison: "Oh, my!"

Li: "That has GOT to be embarrassing beyond words!"

Madison: *nods head in agreement* "Very. Plaid boxers with that outfit is a definite fashion 'no-no'!"

Clow Reed: "This match should prove interesting after all. I can't wait to see Yue's reaction to that little stunt!"

Yue: *face extremely red* "How DARE you…?!"

Sesshoumaru: *small chuckle* "Don't get too excited…"

Yue: *pulls up his pants and holds them with one hand* "Might as well look while you can; I'm sure it's something you've never seen before…"

Mitsuno: "Ooh, double burn!"

Sairen: "This fight is going to get real ugly, real quick. Case in point:"

*as she speaks, Sesshoumaru extends his claws and goes in for another fast lunge, Saturn again hopping out of the way. Yue, however, looks as if this is exactly what he wanted. Right at the last moment, he does a flip over his head, reaching out with his free hand. Sesshoumaru's first swipe misses, and the second tears the side of Yue's robe*

Sesshoumaru: "Ouch!" *touches the top of his head* "What the hell did you do?"

Yue: *first examines his damaged clothing, then the strands of hair he plucked out* "Hmn. I'll have to get that fixed. Unfortunately, due to the amount of razes and splits this one strand of your hair has, I seriously doubt that skinning you and auctioning your hide on E-Bay would cover the cost."

Naraku: "Then why exactly did he bother pulling out his hair?" *suddenly remembers what Saiyan had done to Inuyasha in the first Round* "Is he going to use a lunar spell?"

Yue: *overhearing Naraku, since he has on a mike* "Something like that…"

*the strands of hair begin to glow, then braid themselves and thicken*

Sairen: "Looks like Yue's made himself a little toy."

Mitsuno & Naraku: *give Sairen a funny look* o.Ô

Sairen: *ignores Mitsuno & Naraku's funny look* "…yes, indeed. I do believe he has made a whip out of Sesshoumaru's hair!"

Yue: "Now we can put those damaged ends to use, eh, Sesshoumaru?"

*He proceeds to flay him alive with his own hair. Sesshoumaru, on the defensive, blocks all of the attacks, though his arms become scratched and a little bloody in the process*

Sesshoumaru: *thinking* 'It's a good thing I DID decide to use that revitalizing conditioner after shampooing, or this might actually hurt!' *Yue's next strike is caught in Sesshoumaru's left hand, with the top half of the whip wrapping around his fist* "Sorry, Yue, but this is one of those cases where this will hurt you more than it will me instead of vice-versa."

*Sesshoumaru suddenly yanks the hair whip towards him. An unprepared Yue follows up until he is within arms length. Then--*

WHAM!

Mitsuno: "Damn, son!"

Sairen: "Sesshoumaru's punch has sent Yue flying back to the other side of the ring, where he will collide with the ropes--"

Naraku: "--but will they help or hinder him from going out of The Ring?"

*Yue hits the ropes, all right. But, like in one of those Daffy Duck and Wile E. Coyote cartoons, the ropes extend backwards from the force and snap forward with an equal and opposite reaction*

Yue: "Whoa…!"

Sairen: *raises an eyebrow* "I guess it helped him…" *trails off*

*Yue comes propelling back towards Sesshoumaru, who, instead of punching him, steps aside a bit and sticks out his arm.*

Yue: ~~GACKT!~~

BOOM!

Mitsuno: "Hell YES! WOOT, WOOT!!!!!" *raises fists into the air*

Sairen: "And yet another example of how we layeth the smaketh down here on GrudgeMatch, with Sesshoumaru giving Yue the mother of all clotheslines!"

Sakura: "Oh, no, Yue!"

Yue: @_@;;

Kero: "Yue! Quit playing around and kick his ass, already!" *mutters* "You're making us look bad…"

*Yue has still not moved from his spot on the floor, so Saturn begins counting*

Saturn: "One…two…three…"

Mitsuno: "Hold that count, Sailor, I think he's getting up!"

*Yue slowly manages to stand, rubbing his throat and glaring at the inu*

Yue: *in a lower-than-usual voice* "Hmn. It seems that you might prove a challenge after all."

Sesshoumaru: "You're not too bad yourself." *looks down at the hair whip at his feet, and allows some poison to drip from his claws and disintegrate it* "Now we are back to square one."

Yue: *slightly out of focus* "…Indeed we are…" *blinks once as if to clear his mind* "It's been fun, but I have other things to do tonight.

Sesshoumaru: "Like what, China? Make egg rolls?" *thinks* 'Actually, I could go for some Singapore Pancit…'

*a low rumbling sound jars him out of his thoughts. Sortta.*

Sesshoumaru: *makes a face* "…no way that's my stomach…"

*from in front of the seating area behind him*

Saiyan: "Oh, GODS NO!"

Dairen: "I sincerely hope that's a false alarm!"

Mitsuno: *distracted by cracks forming in The Ring* "Um…guys. I really DON'T think he meant he has gas…"

Naraku: *getting annoyed* "Why is it that everyone is suddenly so focused on bodily functions?"

Sairen: *tsch* "Aren't we sensitive tonight."

Naraku: "Hey, I have feelings, too, you know!"

Sairen: *hmph* "If you ask me, you're a little TOO sensitive--only an emotional basket case would ruin the lives of many just because one miko liked a hanyou better than you!"

Naraku: "For your information, I only ruined the lives of two people because of that little incident."

Sairen: *skeptical* "So everything else was just random."

Naraku: *wavers hand* "Meh…"

Mitsuno: *still staring at The Ring* "Um…guys…you might wanna watch this! I think Yue's about to go all out!"

*Sairen and Naraku stop arguing and look at The Ring just in time to see a bunch of giant vines burst out of the ground*

~~CRAAAAACKK~~ ~~CRAAAAACKK~~ ~~CRAAAAACKK~~ SCHWOOP! SCHWOOP! SCHWOOP! (ETC, ETC…)

Sesshoumaru: *has been watching each vine as it comes up* "Hmm."

Yue: "What? No last words? Might as well go for it, since it will be difficult to talk while being strangled."

*Sesshoumaru smiles and--wait. Sesshoumaru's SMILING?!*

Inuyasha: *sing-song voice* "Someone's gonna die…."

Kagome: "Inuyasha!"

Inuyasha: "What? You know what happens when he smiles! I almost feel kinda sorry for the other guy!"

*without any expression of his own, Yue unleashes the giant vines on Sesshoumaru, which have developed razor sharp pointy ends. He manages to dance out of the way of most of them; while he rips one of them apart, he gets grazed by another from behind*

Sesshoumaru: *growls a little, holding his upper left arm*

Mitsuno: "Uh, oh! He's been hit!"

Yue: "Aw…too bad. I guess this fight's going to be over soon. Those are poison vines, you know."

*Sesshoumaru says nothing, yet his grin is absolutely feral.*

Sairen: "Now THAT'S the kind of grin someone wears before doing something totally unkosher. What does Sesshoumaru have up his sleeve?"

Naraku: *a bit nervous, but even more curious* "I do not know…but something tells me he might get another foul before long!"

Sesshoumaru: "You really are the embodiment of the blond stereotype, Yue."

Yue: *raises an eyebrow* "Oh?"

Sesshoumaru: "Did you really think you could kill ME with poison?"

Yue: *frowns and thinks* 'Crap. I forgot his immunity. I guess I'll just have to squeeze the life out of him, though it will take a little longer.'

*the vines suddenly move in at a faster speed than before. This time, though, Sesshoumaru attacks all of them at once*

Sesshoumaru: "D O K K A S U ! ! !" (poison flower attack. I hope.)

*his own poison melts through some of the vines. With two more attacks, he gets rid of the rest*

Naraku: "Nicely done, Sesshoumaru."

Mitsuno: "The question is, what happens next? Sesshoumaru has managed to defend against all of Yue's attacks and even get two of his own in!"

Sairen: "I'm not sure if pantsing your opponent counts as an attack, Mits."

Mitsuno: "Well, one and a half, then! The point is, Sesshoumaru just might win this one!"

Naraku: *catches a glint off of something forming behind Yue's back* "Or not. Watch very closely…"

*Sairen and Mitsuno also look*

Sairen: "Ouch. That will leave a mark if it hits its target."

*Sesshoumaru draws his sword. Yue twirls his own blades*

Sesshoumaru: "Shall we?"

Yue: *shrugs* "Ladies first."

*in the audience*

Tori: "Wow. Is he always this mean? it's hard to believe he and Julien are the same person."

Sakura: "He's a bit cold at times, but I've never seen him like this!"

Kero: "Yeah, me, neither. I think Clow might have overlooked something and made him bipolar."

*everyone looks at Clow Reed, who frowns in return*

Clow: "No, Cerberus, Yue is no more bipolar than you are. He does surprise me at times, though. I did not think he would even go through with this…" *he pauses, seeing what's behind Yue's back* "…or pull a trick as nasty as the one coming up!"

*Sesshoumaru and Yue run at each other; the former leaps and attacks with Tensuaiga. Yue ducks and rolls out of the way. And remember that big shiny thing behind his back? That was the larger of one of his killer crystals, with a few more skinner ones next to it. None of them duck and roll out of the way like Yue did, and all are the same color as Tensuaiga's energy. Sesshoumaru notices the diamonds too little too late.*

Sesshoumaru: *sees crystals coming towards him and knows he can't move in time* "Oh, sh--!"

*a rather interesting sound acts as the censor instead of Rashim as Yue's hidden attack skewers him and knocks him out of The Ring*

Sairen: "O, wow! Look at him go!"

Mitsuno: "Yue's counter attack came so fast that it's throwing Sesshoumaru all the way back towards the audience section--"

THWACK!

"--and pinning him to the wall!"

Naraku: *watches as he begins to bleed* "That will be a mess to clean up."

Dairen: *sniff, sniff* "I smell blood…"

Saiyan: *stomach growls* "I told you we should have grabbed someone on the way over…"

Sairen: *overhears* "Don't you guys go on a lunch break now, either! We don't need any lawsuits!"

Dairen: *sulking* "Well, it's a little hard to sue someone when you're dead, Sairen…"

*in The Ring*

Saturn: "Hmn. Interesting attack, Yue. One…two…three…"

Yue: "It should take him a while to get those out, if he ever does. Even then, he might not make it back into The Ring in time!" *adds silently* 'and if he does, he'll probably bleed to death before he can do anything else of worth.'

*Sesshoumaru struggles to drag out the largest of the crystals, but to no avail*

Sairen: *heard everything Yue said, including his thoughts* "Holy ::cow pie::! Yue's a friggen BEAST!" *sends a side-glare to Rashim for censoring her*

Sesshoumaru: *stops struggling and gives an ironic smile* "…is he, now?"

Saturn: "…five…six…"

Mitsuno: "Tell me about it. He's pinned with at least six of those!"

Inuyasha: *resentful* "Man. I wanted to defeat Sesshoumaru!"

Miroku: "Well, you could always argue with Yue over it, and maybe he'll go easier on him."

Inuyasha: *glances from Yue to Sesshoumaru, who's still stuck to the far wall* "…that's quite all right, Miroku." *turns back around* "Wait. Why is my brother smiling again?"

*he soon finds out. Sesshoumaru's eyes turn a bright red as he begins to radiate with youkai energy of the same color*

Saturn: "…eight…nine…"

Yue: *senses a massive raise in energy before he sees it* "What the hell…?"

Sairen: *notices Sesshoumaru as well* "Man, oh, man, is this a battle or is this a battle?"

*all audience members in the section in front of the inu begin screaming and scattering while the sound of rearranging bones and shattering crystals can be heard in the background. Soon after, a giant, pissed off gray-blue monster is standing in the rubble from the somewhat smaller section it managed to crush*

Mitsuno: "For everyone who's too busy running for their lives to look, Sesshoumaru has transforming into his overly large not-so-cuddly dog form!"

Saturn: "…ten…eleven…" *stops counting with a gasp*

Yue: *slightly annoyed* "Why did you stop counting?"

Saturn: "You might wish to move, Yue." *without further explanation, she jumps over to The Box, which is a fairly good distance out of the way*

Mitsuno: "Hey! What are you doing, Hotaru? You could have finished the--"

*a snarl cuts her off, followed by a very loud exhale, followed by--*

CRASH! ~SSSSSSSSS~

******************************************************************************

wait--what the hell just happened? why did it just end there?

i'll tell you what the hell just happened: i'm on page 21 of this thing! i'm splitting this Round up so it can actually fit on Fanfiction.net and not give me a corrupt file or something. i know everyone's been waiting a while for this, and all of a sudden DarkFlame's gonna draw it out even longer. well, not that much longer--i have a few more pages of this written already. That's when i looked at the page number and said, "WTF? ok, the end of this Round's gonna be a separate entry for the sake of decency."

and trust me, it will be worth the extra entry. until i finish and post it, lemme know if this part was worth the wait--comments and criticism both welcome. no flames, though: the arena already got burned down once -_-;;