Chapter Eight
"Angel," Wesley met them at the door of the hotel as they came in. "You are alright. What about Solcapprodee?"
"I'm fine. I best get Susy upstairs to rest." Wesley followed up the steps but the atmosphere seemed heavy and conversation was limited. Angel closed the door between themselves and Wes ... maybe things weren't all right with him after all.
Angel set Susan down on the bed still wrapped in his trench coat. He ran another bath for her and sprinkled the powder in it. Instantly the smell of ginger filled the air and the water turned a milky white. He went back to Susy and picked her up, carrying her into the bathroom. He sat her on the tub edge, supporting her all the while. He removed the coat and the soiled red gown and threw them in a pile on the floor. "Best burn that." He said as he lifted Susan into the tub and added a blood soaked towel to the pile.
"Oh, that feels so good, " Susan, said very weakly as she slid down into the warm water. "Angel, you saved my life and my soul. I'll never be able to repay you!"
"Just get well."
The water seemed to give Susan a strength that one would think couldn't be found anywhere in her body.
"You be okay while I make you more green tea?"
"Sure. You best go talk to Wesley and Cordelia, they were very worried for you."
"They didn't support us."
"They care about you a lot. They didn't want to risk loosing you, and they really don't know me."
"I'll be right back, " Angel said as he picked up the pile of soiled clothes.
Downstairs Cordelia and Wesley were waiting at the desk. They both were shocked at the sight of the blood stained articles.
"How's Susan?" Cordy asked.
"Seems to be a bit better. She was in a lot of pain and has lost a lot of blood."
"I imagine normal considering how that demon took control." Wesley noted, "So you were successful?"
"Yeah, soul's still intact." Angel hesitated then added. "Cordy could you go to the drug store and get some ... you know ... woman supplies."
"Right on it, Angel." Cordy said as she grabbed her handbag and went out.
"Wesley, I'm sorry about this morning. I thought you had abandoned us, but I guess Susy is right ... you only wanted the best. She is a good person. I don't know why but she makes me feel something that I haven't felt in a very long time. Like I have to take care of her."
"Angel, you have got to be careful."
"It's not like with Darla or Buffy. It is much deeper than that. It's almost like a peaceful feeling." Angel shrugged his shoulders, "I've got to make this tea."
Cordelia was back quickly and took the supplies up to Susan's room. Not getting an answer to her knock she quietly went in and knocked on the bathroom door.
"Come in, Cordy," Susan answered.
"I got some things for you," Cordelia said as she set the bag on the counter. She was surprised when she looked at Susan and noticed how much better she seemed. The stress appeared to be gone and was replaced by a look of peace.
"It worked?" Cordy asked.
"Yeah, Angel was right. I wasn't going to let him do it, but he was right after all."
"I'm sorry Wesley and I didn't support it, and I'm glad it worked out the way that it did. Angel sent me to the drug store for you. Hope you are okay."
"I'll be fine, it is normal I guess, if you can consider any of this normal."
"I got you a few other things too," Cordy said pulling them out of the bag. "Your own brush, comb, tooth paste, toothbrush and some sleepwear. You will probably be staying for awhile." Cordy held up a pair of flannel pajamas.
"Steering me away from the sexy look. I don't feel too sexy anyway. I guess I'll be staying a night or two. Thanks Cordelia. I know that it hasn't been easy to like me under these circumstances, but maybe we can be friends now."
"I'm glad it all worked out, I'll get some towels for you." Cordy went to leave and met Angel at the door carrying the tea. "I was scared you'd be taken away from us," Cordy hugged him.
"I'm okay, Cordy."
"Susan is too. Another point for the good guys."
Angel set the tea on the night table and met Cordelia at the door as she returned with the towels. "I'll take those," he said as he reached for them. "I'll be down to talk shortly." Cordy was shocked at the change in Angel, never had she ever known him to act this way.
Angel was surprised to see Susan looking so much better. Chu Whan certainly knew his business. He set the towels on the counter and turned to help but she put her hand up for a towel. "I should be able to manage, Angel. I guess I better try to get some modesty back."
"I'll wait in your room," Angel was starting to enjoy this caring for someone - especially someone who made him feel so comfortable, and this was the first time in over two hundred years he had had the opportunity. He thought for a moment how things were with Buffy and Darla. They certainly were his life at the time, but they never really needed him. He cursed the fact that he could not completely join with a woman again.
Susan came out of the bathroom dressed in the new p.j.s. "Cordy got me these - think we've made a truce but I also think she's worried about us getting too close. She cares a lot about you."
"I know," Angel stood up from the chair and helped Susan over to the bed, as she was still very weak. "Your tea is waiting here for you," he said handing her the cup after she had sat on the turned down bed and slid in under the covers.
"Oh, this feels so good. I can't believe how tired I am. It seems to have hit so suddenly." She drank the tea down quickly as it had cooled by now. "Hopefully I can acquire a taste for this." She set the cup back on the night table and lay back on the pillow. "I guess it has been about ten days since I've had a good sleep. Getting beat up while I was asleep didn't give me much rest."
Angel stood very quietly not knowing what to do next.
"Can you stay with me until I go to sleep? It is still a scary thought. What if he isn't actually gone?"
"Sure I can," Angel was relieved to get the invitation. He too was getting very tired. Since Susan came into the office almost three days ago he had gone without rest. She patted the bed beside her, but didn't turn back the covers. Angel lay down on top of them, setting the pillow so he sat up a little.
Susan lay with her head on his chest, "Do you mind if I do this?"
"No, it is nice to hold you," he said putting his arm around her.
"I like being here," she paused, "thanks, Angel." Almost instantly she was sound asleep. Angel closed his eyes and listened to the evenness of her breathing. How he wished he could be human again. He wondered for a moment how he could move without waking her, but then realized he didn't want to anyway and settled back to sleep.
Angel awoke with a start, realizing that Susan was doubled over in pain in the bed beside him. He looked at the time and realized that several hours had passed since they went to sleep. Chu Whan had said every two hours for the tea, no doubt for this very reason. Hurriedly he ran down the stairs to prepare another cup.
Cordelia and Wesley were reading the papers looking for a new case when Angel came downstairs. It was only the middle of the afternoon but it felt much later.
"How is she?" Cordelia asked out of concern when she realized Angel was hurrying.
"I was late with the tea and she is in a lot of pain again. I best hurry, come into the kitchen to talk.
"We are rather concerned about you, Angel," Wesley started, "You and Susan seem to be getting too close."
"I just want to see her get well," he answered, setting the kettle on the stove. "This has certainly been a trying experience and will be over soon."
Cordy had put something into the microwave, then turned to Angel, "She's getting awfully attached to you, sort of 'knight in shining armor, lady in distress syndrome.'"
"Don't worry she knows the consequences, ... we both do. We won't let anything develop beyond control." Angel wondered why he always had to be in control. "I best get this tea upstairs."
The microwave beeped and Cordelia removed a heated gel pack and handed it to Angel, "Take this to Susan, too."
"What is this for?"
"I'm sure she'll know."
The tea worked wonders and after spending two days in bed Susan was much better. Angel spent most of the time with her and took great pleasure in being needed in a different way for a change. They got to know each other very well. Angel told her of his history, even some of the gruesome parts. Of course it was a long story although he really couldn't remember any of his days before becoming a vampire.
He was anxious to learn about Susan's life, how being homeless really didn't seem to be a burden. But also how she got to where she was. She wasn't overly eager to tell of her earlier years, but Angel had been so generous with his history that she couldn't help but tell her secrets. Never had she disclosed her past to any person before and the pain it held showed freely in her eyes.
"I was an only child. Born to Erik and Sharon on the Canadian prairies. We never seemed to have any money because my father drank it away. When I was twelve he was driving drunk, hit the railing on a bridge and killed my mother. He ended up going to jail and I was supposed to stay in a foster home, but after one night I hit the road and haven't been back since."
"At first I headed west to Vancouver, thumbing my way. Life seemed very easy and very hard all at the same time and I felt extremely empty. I tried a lot of different things to help fill the void, drugs, alcohol, sex, but nothing ever helped. It seemed like there was something out there I was supposed to find. By the time I was twenty-five I had had three miscarriages and when I got pregnant again I tried so hard to stay off of the drugs, but they really controlled my life. I gave birth to a little girl. She didn't even weigh four pounds, and for five days I watched her get weaker and weaker until she died. She just wasn't strong enough. I killed her because of those damn drugs. I thought maybe she was the missing part of me and I could have died when she did."
"When I was in the hospital I met Pastor Don and he got me praying and brought God into my life. I named her Faith -- the baby I mean -- and after we buried her Pastor Don sent me down here to Pastor Mike's shelter and the sunshine. He said that I needed lots of sunshine. I worked with Mike for almost three years then went to the Sally Ann on Pine."
"I don't think of her as often as I used to, but I can still remember how sweet she smelled, and how soft her hair was against my skin." The tears formed in her eyes and one trickled down over her cheek, and Angel held her tightly. "God has filled my heart except for one little corner. When I find what is waiting for me out there maybe I'll get her back and someone to share her with," she finished in a whisper.