In this chapter, John refers to the headmaster of Hogwarts as "Pompous Doubletalk." For foreign readers, this is a pun on the name Albus Dumbledore.
Chapter 9
Business with Goblins
Two hours later
Thursday, 25th July, 8 a.m
Potter Manor
Ten-year-old Harry Potter was back to being in shock.
First, Harry had been awakened only so he could be told (by a house-elf), "Breakfast be ready."
Second, nobody had demanded that Harry cook the breakfast.
Third, when Harry finally found his way from his bedroom to the dining-room table—Potter Manor was huge!—he was allowed to eat with older Harry and older Hermione. Or as he thought of them now, despite knowing better: John and Paulina Potter.
Fourth, Harry was allowed to eat as much breakfast as he wanted.
For four different reasons, ten-year-old Harry was in shock as he forked his eggs.
"So, Harry," asked John, ten minutes into the morning meal, "what do you think about being rescued from the Dursleys? Or meeting Hermione? Or the fact that Paulina and I are actually Hermione and you from the future?"
Harry looked at John. "Rescuing me from the Dursleys was brilliant. Thank you, thank you, thank you. As for Hermione, it's weird—I just met her, but I can see us being best of friends soon. But you being me, and Paulina being Hermione, erm..."
"Yes?"
"I don't know how to say this right, but ... I don't see why you'd lie to me, but I don't believe you. Not deep down. I don't know Hermione much, but I can't see Paulina as Hermione grown up. And John, me becoming you in seven years—I can't believe this at all. You kicked Uncle Vernon's arse—I could never do that!"
Paulina said, "Harry honey, until yesterday morning, John and you were the same person. Seven years of his life later, this man has learned cunning and leadership skills, he has iron-hard determination, and he can fight magically to amaze you—only Voldy and Dumbledore are his equals—but oh, the cost to him! His life for the past seven years has been awful. Don't envy him for what he can do that you can't, or what he is that you aren't—because seven years from now, when you are healthy and happy, I guarantee that John will be envying you."
John nodded. "What she said."
Later that morning, at 8:59 a.m
After breakfast and Harry's shower, John, his wife, and his "cousin" Harry were elf-popped outside, to just outside the front gate of the lands for Potter Manor. John was waiting for a goblin warder to show up and to install the last part of the warding of Potter Manor's lands: charging the new wards and performing the Fidelius Charm.
Yesterday, while John and Paulina were out, goblin warders had installed new wardstones, including the wardstone in the basement of Potter Manor. The goblins had not charged the wards, but had only put the wardstones in place to be charged.
Because of a genius suggestion by John's genius wife, the wardstones were not installed at the four corners of the Potter Manor property. Instead, the wardstones were placed one foot inside the four corners of the property; for an intruder to bump up against the wards, the intruder would be trespassing one foot into Potter Manor's lands.
It would be years—and if John's and Paulina's plans worked, it would be never—before Death Eaters would attempt to invade Potter Manor. On the other hand, John expected the first would-be Apparation-visit by the bearded meddler to happen within a week. Dumbledore would be in for such a surprise when, after he crashed into the Potter Manor wards, Amelia Bones arrested him for trespassing and she could make the charge stick!
Foop. Amid John, Paulina, and young Harry, a goblin now stood. The goblin was holding a clipboard.
The goblin's clipboard was holding a work order for "Potter Manor," which the goblin showed to John. On the work order, goblin-version map coordinates for the four corners of Potter Manor's lands were written down.
The first thing that happened, once the goblin arrived, was the almost-charging of Potter Manor's wards. John side-along apparated the goblin into the basement of Potter Manor, where the Master Wardstone was. The goblin taught John how to charge the Master Wardstone; but John would not actually charge Potter Manor's wards until after the goblin left.
After the wards-charging lesson, John side-along apparated the goblin outside, back over to where Paulina and Harry were waiting.
Foop—the goblin disappeared. John knew that this goblin, whose job it was to cast the Fidelius Charm on Potter Manor's house and lands this morning, had to stand at the corners of those lands before he cast the Charm.
Foop. Less than a minute after the goblin had disappeared, he reappeared. He put his clipboard down at his feet, then asked John, "Are you ready?"
"I am. Do it."
The goblin waved his hands, and spoke words in Goblinspeak. John did not need to know Goblinspeak to know that at the end of the incantation were the words The Secret Keeper is—the goblin pointed to John—that person there.
John felt something attach to his magical core.
At the same moment, the goblin warder blinked once, but otherwise did not react.
Paulina gasped. "I declare, John, that felt strange."
Now young Harry was working his way into a panic. "What just happened? I've forgotten something! Where are we?"
John soothed the boy. "Harry, everything is as it should be. In a moment, I'll fix things with you and with Paulina. Paulina, please tell me what you see."
Paulina replied, "We're outside, with a dirt road passing in front of me, and nothing else is visible but farmland and trees. I just forgot something important, but I can't begin to guess what I've forgotten."
John glanced around. He likewise saw a dirt road in front of him, trees off in the distance, and farmland behind him—but John also saw Potter Manor in front of him in the distance, a gate by the road in front of him, and a huge lawn between Potter Manor and the entrance gate. A stone path connected the front gate and Potter Manor.
Meanwhile, the goblin was growing impatient. The goblin shoved the clipboard into John's hands, along with a self-inking quill. "Sign at the X."
On the work order, where the words Potter Manor had been written in black, now were written in red, "UNDER FIDELIUS." Where four map-coordinates had been written in black, now was written in red, "UNDER FIDELIUS."
John signed the work order where he was directed to. Foop. The goblin, his self-inking quill, and his clipboard all disappeared.
Young Harry no longer was full-blown panicked now, because Paulina had hugged him and had murmured soothing words, but the boy still looked upset.
John looked at Paulina and at Harry and said, "You two, listen to me carefully. The house and lands for Potter Manor are north of Griffith Road in Gwynedd County, Wales."
"Whoa!" Harry blurted. "The house just appeared. And now I remember it—how could I forget the big house where I just had breakfast?"
With a grin, John replied, "Magic."
Paulina smacked John's arm. "Turkey."
John looked at Paulina and at Harry. "You two stay here while I charge the Potter Manor wards. Then we'll be ready to visit the magical hospital."
Harry made a face.
Five minutes later
At Saint Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries
Harry, along with John and Paulina, were standing in queue to talk to someone called "the Welcome Witch."
Harry heard people whisper, "That's Harry Potter."
Harry had no clue what he would do when someone asked him for his autograph.
For John a.k.a. older Harry, Harry's medical examination at Saint Mungo's was a trial to be endured.
Harry was found to have a monitoring charm on him that reported to somewhere whether Harry was healthy; and another monitoring charm on Harry reported to somewhere whether Harry was alive. Thanatos had reported to dead Older Harry that the silver gizmos in Dumbledore's office had taken their behaviour from these two monitoring charms.
Because of the monitoring charms, Dumbledore had known as soon as it happened, whenever child-Harry had been unhealthy. This meant that in theory, Dumbledore could have gone straight to Number 4 and could have healed the boy. But no, now the evidence was horrifyingly clear that Dumbledore had done no such thing, ever.
The diagnoses of Harry's medical problems was a long list—two pages already, and growing longer—and the list of Harry's prescribed potions was growing too. If Snape were the potioneer who was brewing Harry's healing potions, the Potter family was about to make the greasy git a millionaire.
Harry's examining healer told John, "Somehow he has three bindings on his magical core. Since he's going to Hogwarts next month"—all of Wizarding effing Britain knew that the Boy Who Lived was about to become a Hogwarts firstie—"those three core-bindings need to be removed by 1st September."
John said to the healer, "You're welcome to remove the first one. Paulina will remove the next two, tomorrow and the day after next."
The healer looked at Paulina skeptically. "You know the spell to remove a core binding?"
She replied with a smile, "Bless your heart. The spell is Finiat restrictio, with a reverse-z wand motion."
"Very good. I recommend that right afterwards, you give Mr Potter a half-dose of Dreamless Sleep Potion, so that he's out of action for several hours whilst his magical core readjusts. For the first two hours after a core binding is removed, the patient is likely to perform accidental magic. Don't give him Pepper-Up Potion, no matter what."
Paulina nodded, but then she asked, "If we forget, and he starts performing accidental magic, don't you healers have a spell to put Dreamless Sleep Potion directly into his stomach?"
"We do, the Ex Utrem ad Persona spell. But if you're not familiar with it, it's dangerous—you might put Dreamless Sleep Potion into Mr Potter's heart, not into his stomach. I recommend that if Mr Potter performs accidental magic, Stupefy him."
Paulina nodded, but gave John a meaningful glance. At the first opportunity, she would research the Ex Utrem ad Persona spell, even if she did not use it for twenty years.
By now the Dicta-Quill had written down all of Harry's diagnoses—three pages' worth. John said to the healer, "Please, before you hand me that report, list the dates of every previous visit by Harry to Saint Mungo's."
When the healer handed Harry's medical report to John, John flipped to the last page—and snarled.
"Look at that," he said to Paulina.
Harry James Potter first was treated at Saint Mungo's on 31 July 1980—no surprise. Harry Potter's most recent Saint Mungo's visit, prior to today? 1 August 1981—one or both of his parents had brought in the one-year-old boy for a checkup.
Now John murmured to Paulina, "I want to hurt that bearded schemer. I want to levitate him to the top of the Astronomy Tower, then throw him off. It's one thing to suspect that Pompous Doubletalk was neglectful as a magical guardian, but here's the proof."
Paulina threw her arms round John and hugged him.
Now John let the healer remove one of the three magical bindings on young Harry. But John told the healer to let remain, the boy's vampiric magic-tap that powered Number 4's wards; and also to let the monitoring charms remain.
John murmured to Paulina, "I don't like the magic-tap and the monitoring charms staying in Harry, not one bit. But until they're removed, Dumbledore will keep believing that all is well with his schemes. I'll let him live in his 'fool's paradise' a little longer."
In reply, Paulina's smile was pure Slytherin.
Once the Potters went to Saint Mungo's apothecary and John purchased all the required potions, the next stop was at Gringotts—more specifically, at the goblins' medical clinic—to remove the horcrux in Harry's scar.
Later, in Gringotts's medical clinic
John did something to young Harry that never had been done to John (older Harry) in his previous life: John contracted with the goblins for them to remove the horcrux from young Harry's scar.
John and Paulina were nervous during the ritual, even though Antonia and Thanatos had assured the soulmates that the goblin ritual would work.
John and Paulina were frightened during the ritual, when Harry screamed.
But the ritual worked: Voldy was removed from Harry's forehead, with no harm to the boy.
However, since young Harry's magic still was adjusting to having a core-binding removed, some accidental magic happened right after the horcrux came out of Harry's scar: the stone walls of the ritual room suddenly turned blue. Whoops.
(Neither John nor Paulina Stupefyed Harry in response.)
The Potter family coinage vault was charged twenty thousand galleons for the ritual—twice the price of a Firebolt (if Firebolts were being sold in 1991, which they were not). John considered the twenty-thousand-galleons payment to be money well spent.
John thought, No bearded meddler will convince this Harry to "nobly sacrifice" himself!
Once the Potters finished up in the Gringotts medical clinic, John and Paulina took Harry to the Gringotts lobby, and from there they took him to meet Axefrenzy, the Potter account manager.
When Harry was introduced to Axefrenzy the goblin, Harry looked amazed.
John said to Harry, "Whenever you're in Gringotts, remember this: Never smile at a goblin by showing your teeth. Goblins consider showing your teeth to be a threat. Goblins get angry then."
Then John looked at Axefrenzy and said, "I ask for your patience, Account Manager Axefrenzy, but there are things that young Harry needs to know now, which he doesn't know at all."
As Axefrenzy listened, John told Harry that the Potter family owned many properties—of which Potter Manor was only one—and the Potter family had partial ownership of businesses, and the Potter family had much money; and that control of what the Potter family owned would change from John to Harry when Harry claimed the Potter Head of House ring on his seventeenth birthday.
When Harry heard this, he looked like he had been smacked in the face with an overgrown tuna fish.
John continued, "Harry, let me give you an idea of how rich the Potter family is. Until you're seventeen, you're not allowed access to either the Potter family coinage vault or the Potter family heirlooms vault; you may access only your trust vault. Your trust vault, from which you can take money beginning on your eleventh birthday, will hold on that date, wizarding money worth a quarter-million pounds."
Harry's jaw dropped.
John continued, "Every July 31, after a year of you taking money from your trust vault, the trust vault will be refilled from the Potter family coinage vault, making your trust vault again be worth a quarter-million pounds on your birthday."
"Whoa," said Harry.
"On your eleventh birthday, you also can claim the Potter Heir Primary ring, which tells anyone who sees it that one day you'll become Lord Potter. Besides the ring giving you higher status in the wizarding world, the ring also comes with many magical protections. For instance, nobody can read your mind while you're wearing the Potter Heir Primary ring, and the ring senses mind-whammy potions near your hand."
"What are 'mind-whammy potions'?" Harry asked.
Paulina answered, "Hate Potion, Love Potion, Lust Potion, Disinterest Potion, Loyalty Potion, Jealousy Potion, Suggestibility Potion, and Doormat Potion are the most commonly used."
Harry scowled.
John said, "There are evil people in Wizarding Britain who want you to marry their daughter when you turn seventeen, so the daughter can take the money you inherit and slip some to her family. If you're not protected against Love Potions, those people will make you fall in love with their daughter, even if she's a self-centered, hot-tempered, stalker fangirl."
Harry said, "So I should put this ring on before I go to Hogwarts next month?"
Paulina hugged Harry, while John said, "Yes, I strongly advise it. Besides avoiding problems with Love Potions, wearing the Heir ring means that if someone tries to read your mind on the sly, he can't."
Harry squared his shoulders and said, "Next week, when I turn eleven, I definitely want to come back here to the bank."
John looked at Axefrenzy and said, "Tell me about Potter rings with magical protection on them. Can Paulina, as wife of the Potter Regent, wear the Lady Potter ring, with all the magical protections that come with this ring? Can I magically protect Harry between now and next week, when he claims the Potter Heir ring? How do I give magical protection to Paulina's second cousin, who is nomaj-born and not a Potter? Can I give magical protection to the girl's parents, who are no-magics?"
Axefrenzy answered thusly—
Yes, John can put the Lady Potter ring on Paulina's hand—but that ring will disappear off Paulina's hand when Harry ascends to Lord Potter at age seventeen. Axefrenzy's recommendation was instead to put a Potter Protection ring on Paulina's hand; the Protection ring will remain on Paulina's hand after Harry's ascension, until/unless Harry Potter as Lord Potter removes the ring from Paulina's hand.
Axefrenzy explained to John—
Certain Potter rings came with enhanced magical protection: the Head of House ring, the Heir(ess) Primary ring, the Heir(ess) Secondary ring, the Heir(ess) Tertiary ring, and the rings for these four people's spouses; also the ring for the Potter Regent and the ring for the Potter Steward. Other members of the Potter family did not qualify for magically enhanced rings; but the Potter Head of House or the Potter Regent could give anyone in the family a Potter Protection ring, which offered the same magical protections as an Heir ring or the Lady Potter ring.
By the by, a Potter Protection ring gave magical protection to someone only when the Potter Head of House or the Potter Regent placed the Potter Protection ring on that person's hand. If the person wanting magical protection grabbed the Potter Protection ring off the table and he tried to put the ring on by himself, nothing magical would happen.
With regards to Harry, Axefrenzy recommended that today John put a Potter Protection ring on Harry's hand; then on Harry's eleventh birthday, John would remove the Potter Protection ring from Harry's hand, just before Harry would don the Potter Heir Primary ring.
For Potter family magic to allow the Potter Head of House or the Potter Regent to put a Potter Protection ring on someone who is not a Potter by blood or marriage, the Head of House or Regent first had to declare the person to be a Protectée of House Potter. Declaring her a Potter Protectée, by the by, caused any magical clothing she owned—such as Hogwarts robes—to now show the Potter crest on the right sleeve.
No-magics could not be declared Protectées. However, assuming that the Protectée girl lived with her parents, the Potter Head of House or Regent could hire Gringotts to ward the girl's parents' property/-ies, and the Ministry could not object to this.
After John heard what Axefrenzy had to say, John decided that today he would take Paulina and Harry into the Potter family heirloom vault, so that they each could select a Potter Protection ring, and so that John could select a Potter Protection ring for Hermione.
But before they did these things, John had to enable Hermione to wear the Potter Protection ring when he put the ring on her hand. Now John obtained Axefrenzy's permission to draw his wand; John pointed his wand at the ceiling and said, "I, John George Potter the Potter Regent, declare Hermione Jean Granger of Crawley, West Sussex, England to be a Protectée of House Potter. So mote it be."
Light flashed in Axefrenzy's office.
Meanwhile in Crawley, West Sussex, England
The aforementioned Hermione Jean Granger was reading The Standard Book of Spells (Grade 3) when she felt a shift in her magical core.
Ten minutes later, she received an owl (her first ever) at her bedroom window. The owl was from Gringotts, and the owl's letter informed Hermione that she was now a Protectée of House Potter.
Hermione realised she did not know exactly what the word Protectée meant.
Anyone else with this realisation would have then thought, I need to remember to ask someone about this when I go to Hogwarts next month. But Hermione instead marked her place in her Standard Book of Spells book, then ransacked her books on wizarding customs till she had her explanation.
When Hermione knew at last what her being a Protectée meant, she smiled big enough to fully expose her oversize front teeth. "Thank you, John Potter," she said aloud.
Back at Gringotts
John asked Axefrenzy for the Gringotts copies of James' and Lily's wills. As Gringotts was sovereign territory, the fact that the Ministry copies of those wills had been sealed by the Chief Warlock, mattered not a whit in Gringotts.
John read each will first, then passed the will to Paulina; when Paulina was done reading, she passed the will to Harry.
Harry frowned. "I don't know any of these people."
John really wanted to put his fist through a wall—even a stone wall. He told Harry, "If you read down further, it mentions Petunia and Vernon—as people you absolutely never should be put with, at all, no way, forget it. Dumbledore is not mentioned until the end of each will, as a witness to the will. Look at the first name on the list of prospective guardians, which is Sirius Black—both wills state he's your 'oath-sworn godfather.' Which means that if he tried to do something to hurt you, he would drop dead."
"So why didn't he take me? Why did I go to the Dursleys?"
"The reason you don't know Sirius Black is because he was thrown in prison for, among other things, betraying you and your parents to Voldemort, who killed them. Sirius Black was imprisoned because supposedly he was the Secret Keeper to the place where your parents were living. But your father's will states that the Secret Keeper was Peter Pettigrew. So Peter Pettigrew, not Sirius Black, was the betrayer of your parents; but Sirius Black is the one in prison, and Sirius Black is the one who was blocked from becoming your guardian."
"What can we do about this Mr Black, who is in prison when he shouldn't be?"
"Don't worry," said John, "I have a plan."
Then John turned to Axefrenzy. "In the meantime, I need three certified copies of each will, paid for by the Potter family coinage vault, and I ask Gringotts to carry out the bequests in the wills, except for the bequest to Peter Pettigrew."
Axefrenzy nodded. "Agreed." Seconds later, John was handed six wills. He handed the wills to Paulina, who put the wills in her beaded handbag.
Then John looked at Axefrenzy again, and this time John smiled like a vampire. "Gringotts is sure that Albus Dumbledore has stolen G47,575 from Harry Potter's trust vault nine separate times, right? For a total of more than 428 thousand galleons, right? Let's ruin the headmaster's day. Are you willing to walk with me to see Director Ragnok?"
As the three human magicals and one goblin were walking towards Director Ragnok's office, Paulina said to Harry, "At the least, Dumbledore stole G428,175 from you. That works out to be 2.14 million pounds."
Harry said angrily, "I had two million pounds, and Dumbledore stole it? I hope they boil him in oil for that!"
Axefrenzy said, "Don't worry, young Mister Potter, Gringotts has recovered all of the money. But this doesn't undo the fact that Albus Dumbledore did steal from you. Has anyone told you that Gringotts hates thieves?"
By then, Axefrenzy was knocking on the door of the office for Director Ragnok. After Ragnok ordered the group to "Enter!", Ragnok asked Axefrenzy, "So who is the thief whom Gringotts hates right now?"
That evening
In the Granger house in Crawley
John had sent messages to and from Hermione, using Greyclay, the head Potter house-elf; and Hermione had telephoned her parents. So when John, Paulina, and Harry were elf-popped to the back door of the Granger house, the Grangers were expecting them.
As soon as Harry walked into the Granger house, Hermione rushed over and hugged him.
When greetings were finished, Dan Granger asked John, "So what's up?"
"Today we went to Saint Mungo's, the magical hospital, and Harry was prescribed potions for all the things that are medically wrong with him. That list is a long list—damn the Dursleys."
Paulina squeezed John's hand.
"Then we went to Gringotts, and the goblins removed the evil piece of Voldemort from Harry's scar."
Everyone applauded, while Harry blushed.
"Next, we went to see the Potter account manager at Gringotts. Axefrenzy met Harry, and Axefrenzy explained to me about Protection rings. Protection rings detect potions in food and drink, and they protect the wearer from mind-magics like mind-reading, magical forgetting, and magical hypnosis of various kinds. Paulina and Harry are each wearing a Protection ring now."
Paulina displayed her Protection ring with no prompting. Blushing Harry needed to be coaxed by Hermione to show the Grangers his own Protection ring.
John said, "Which leads to why we came here tonight. I brought a Protection ring for Hermione." John took the Protection ring from his pocket and held it up. "But even I, the Potter Regent, can't just put this ring on Hermione's hand, since she's not part of the Potter family. So to make this possible, today I declared Hermione to be a Protectée of House Potter."
Paulina smiled at the Grangers. "What Protectée means is that if some magical person hurts Hermione, anyone and everyone in House Potter will ensure that the worthless magical brute wishes he were never born."
John nodded. "If someone hurts Hermione, he immediately should chop off his own foot with a dull axe. It'll save time, and it'll be less painful."
Dan Granger grinned wolfishly. John grinned back.
After John put the Protection ring on Hermione's right hand—the ring immediately shrank to fit—Emma Granger stood up, rushed over, and gave John a strong hug. She said, "John, I can't tell you how relieved Dan and I feel now!"
Before the Potters left, John explained to Dan and Emma that, at no expense to the Granger family, the Granger house in Crawley soon would be given magical protections like crazy. All the Granger parents needed to do was, as the homeowners, to give verbal permission for the goblins to do the work.
As the Potters were about to elf-pop away, Emma Granger said, "The next time you come here, we'll serve cake!"
Paulina laughed in delight. Then she explained to Harry, "Only on special occasions does Mum serve food with sugar in it."
Early the next morning (Friday, 26th July)
Gringotts
In the lobby of Gringotts, and on the outside front of the building and facing the steps, were duplicate posters.
Each poster showed a drawing of a wizard. That wizard was wearing robes that were ever-changing in both their many colours, and in their designs. The wizard also was drawn with a grey beard that was so long that the beard brushed against the ground, and with grey hair that was so long that it trailed behind the wizard like a cape. The ends of the hair were tied with ribbons that fluttered in the wind.
The text of each poster?
WANTED
ALBUS P DUMBLEDORE
For stealing at least G428 175 from Harry Potter,
the Boy Who Lived