Disclaimers: Don't own any part of Gundam Wing nor it's characters. Merely borrowing them for a little torture.

Warnings: Shounen-ai (because I suck at yaoi) , major A.U, some OOC I think, deathfic

Finding Heaven

Part Twelve: Facing the music

Heero was stretched out on Duo's couch, reading a write up on the latest acquisition his company was considering. Normally, it would have taken one hundred percent of his attention. Well, normally, pre-Duo. The said man was currently walking around the house idly, catching up on some housework. It was a very nice house and looked to be something out of a 80s family sitcom. It was decorated as such, and Heero felt it was more of a wistful desire than any real conscious thought put into it. It was as if Duo had hoped this was how his home would have looked like if his childhood had been different.

Heero frowned, realising that Duo's childhood was still a very sensitive subject between the two. He had thought Duo would start opening up to him after that initial spark of hope, but the long haired man had remained stubbornly silent about it. What Heero found out about the oft times secretive man's past was what Duo inadvertently implied. Sometimes, it seemed like a slip of a tongue and Heero saw these little slips as parts that make up Duo as a whole. He found out that his boyfriend was an orphan and was sent to an orphanage that was burnt down later. Since then, he had been running in the streets until he met Solo, then Wufei. The details were 'sealed from public knowledge' as Duo quipped with a strained smile.

Heero had been learning to interpret Duo's smiles as well. And that pained one meant he had to back away from the emotional cliff before Duo pushed him over it. But, admittedly Duo had been more open about things, namely his past, than he was before. Maybe, Heero reflected, that it had very much to do with him. He had been a damned ass during the first six weeks of their relationship. More like a selfish ass. Duo's defences had been sky high during that time but self absorbed Heero hadn't really noticed, thinking Duo didn't trust him. He realised now it was merely a defence mechanism. Duo had it around for so long he didn't even know it was there anymore.

Putting those thoughts away, Heero let his heated blue gaze roam over Duo's slender back as he bent over to dust a bottom shelf, his rounded bottom sticking high into the air. The Japanese felt the heat rush to his loins as he felt the first stirrings of desire. He laughed ruefully at himself. He really had no self control when it came to Duo. He no longer pressured the younger man into a physical relationship but they had carried on like they did before. Kissing, petting, and other things that brought them both to the threshold of completion but he was careful to keep at least one article of clothing on them at any time. Duo had offered, but this time around, it was Heero who refused. Now, it was Heero who wanted a clean slate, and by that it meant the final showdown with Relena Peacecraft.

That name and the person brought a sour taste to his mouth.

That email had brought about some repercussions that Heero had anticipated but they still made him feel uncomfortable. He didn't tell Duo about the irate phone call he received from Relena from Sanq a few days after the email and the ringing in his ears days after. Duo just thought he was hard of hearing for a while. Those phone calls had continued during the past month, but they had been toned down since then. It had taken on an almost coaxing quality. Heero wasn't prepared to handle this from a distance and told her in no uncertain terms that they would speak of it when she got back. He went as far as to get his secretary to draft the cancellation of his engagement to be posted in the society's column. After Relena was his father. If he was honest to himself, it had scared him more than he cared to admit. Most of the time he felt like flipping the finger at Relena, but he was scared to death to disappoint his father. Even now, the thought sent his heart pounding.

As he warm gaze focused on Duo once again, he felt himself calming down. Whatever difficulties he was going to go through, if it was for Duo, it was worth it. For Duo, anything was worth it. Besides, he was the only heir to the Lowe fortune, and his father wasn't stupid enough to cut him off from the fortune. Odin Lowe believed very much in keeping the money within the blood and Heero was his only blood.

The past month had been completely idyllic. It had started with a simple dinner where Heero had cooked for them.

"Hmmm…" Duo murmured happily tucking into the gooey lasagne, sucking in air to cool a hot mouthful.

Heero smiled at the other man's antics. "It's hot," he warned needlessly, suppressing a small smile.

Duo nodded gleefully. "Hmmm…." He repeated, his eyes closed in rapture. "I can't believe my stove works."

"How long haven't you used it?" Heero laughed. The two of them had spent the afternoon cleaning out the stove and making sure it was actually useable before they went out for grocery shopping.

Duo ducked his head, a flush colouring his otherwise pale cheeks. "Uh… Since the day I moved in?"

Heero coughed, choking on his soda. "And how long since you have moved in?" He couldn't control the smile that crept out this time.

"Hey, I do use the damned stove okay," Duo said, defensively, gripping his fork like a weapon, violet eyes flashing as if daring Heero to argue with him. "I make wonderful boiled water."

And Heero completely lost it. "I wonder how you didn't starve all this while," he teased, reaching to hold the other man's hand, caressing the back of it with his thumb.

"You learn to find food almost anywhere once you've been on the streets long enough," Duo said, softly, not meeting Heero's gaze.

Heero's smile faded, realising too late that he had hit a bit too close to a nerve once again. "Well," he changed the subject, hoping to get them on higher ground. "I hope to taste your tasty boiled water one day."

Duo jerked his head up to stare at Heero disbelievingly. He gifted Heero with a tremulous smile. His eyes held gratitude that Heero didn't pry into where Duo wasn't comfortable yet. "Thank you," he said softly, leaned over the kitchen counter where they had been sharing their meal and kissed Heero softly. Before he could pull away, Heero held on the back of his head and claimed a more satisfying kiss.

"I only want to see you smile," Heero announced, his gaze filled with warmth of understanding and love. He wanted nothing for himself if it meant Duo would find happiness everyday of his life.

He never knew Duo had such athletic talent as the braided man lunged across the counter and tackled Heero to the floor kissing him for all he was worth, hands frantically working to pull his shirt off. There was intensity to Duo's desire that wasn't there before, a need that frightened Heero a little.

"Duo…" Heero moan softly, trying to stop this before it went any further. His senses were being blissfully assaulted and he coherent thoughts were flying out of his mind through Duo's skilful hands. "We have to stop. We…" He bit back another moan as Duo's teeth nip the sensitive spot along his jaw line. "Stop..." He held the other man's hands tight against his chest, tracing kisses along Duo's smooth forehead and temple.

Duo raised hurt filled eyes to meet Heero's own that were darkened with passion. "You don't want me?" It was an almost boyish question and one so plaintively asked that almost undid Heero.

The Japanese man groaned with pained laughter. "Gods, you know what you do to me, Duo. Don't ask me questions like that," and to prove his point, he grinded his heat against Duo's lightly.

"Then…" Confusion coloured Duo's features.

"We still many things to settle between us," Heero reminded, tweaking Duo's nose teasingly. "Relena, my father…"

"I don't care anymore; you've done so many things for me. I just wanted…" Duo was silenced with a finger on his lips.

"You are not ready," Heero told him, searching Duo's eyes. "I want to come clean, let me speak to Relena and we will do what ever you want. I promise."

Unable to help himself, Duo threw himself on Heero's chest. "I'm just so tired of being lonely," he sobbed, tears coming unbidden. "Hold me, please," he whispered achingly.

Heero shifted so that Duo lay fully on top of him. He merely held the sobbing young man, who pressed himself as close to Heero as he could, burying his face in the Japanese man's strong chest. "I'm here, Duo, I'll always be here. I'm not going anywhere," he soothed, stroking Duo's heavy hair gently, his other arm tightly wound around the man's waist. He marvelled at the strong protective tendencies Duo brought out in him and he also treasured the glimpse of the boy beneath the flippant young man. Duo, the boy, was so lost, so desperate for love and that was so well hidden under the painstakingly constructed mask of a devil may care attitude.

Long moments passed and Heero thought Duo had fallen asleep. It felt nice, Duo's weight on him. He had never just held the man before. It always had been them groping at each other and once they climaxed, they moved apart and slept nearly on opposite sides of the bed. Heero loved Duo even from the beginning, of that he didn't doubt but the protectiveness was never there. He had always seen Duo as a strong man with background similar to his own but recent events had changed all that.

"I'm sorry," Duo mumbled, still fisting Heero's shirt, holding on like a lifeline. "I hate crying, I never cry. Boys don't cry," he stressed.

Heero thought it sounded like a mantra to Duo, something that he had repeated so often it had become so firm a belief that it didn't allow to do anything else. "I love you," he told Duo simply.

"That's enough," Duo returned with a soft sigh. Coming abruptly to himself, he slid off Heero with a guilty smile. "I got you all wet." He gestured to the drenched shirt Heero had on.

Heero snorted, getting up and bending over to give Duo a hand up. As he pulled the other man up, Duo let out a groan of pain. "What's wrong?" He asked, concerned as Duo's hands went immediately to his back, rubbing at it.

"Guess I sprained it, jumping on you," Duo teased with a smile.

Heero shook his head and led them both out of the kitchen. In the days that followed, he found himself being a more permanent fixture in the Maxwell household. It started with a change of clothes; he had learnt something after the whole kitchen floor incident. Duo's clothes just didn't fit him well enough, being broader around the shoulders and thicker across the waist from the fey like man who owned his heart. Then it was other little things, his shaving cream, his perfume, his toothbrush, then the more obvious signs such as his laptop, his briefcase, his car. After two weeks of dancing around the subject, Heero had hesitantly asked if he could move in, and Duo had responded with a wide eyed look of innocence and saying, "You mean you haven't?" and threw open the closet, gesturing to Heero's clothes that took up half the space.

And that, as they said, was history.

A low groan brought Heero out of his reverie and to the present. Duo was bent over in pain, holding on to the shelf he was cleaning for support. Heero flew to his boyfriend's side in an instant, snaking a supportive arm around Duo's waist, shoring him up. Duo threw him a sheepish smile as Heero guided him slowly to the couch.

"It is still hurting?" Heero asked, frowning unhappily. He made Duo lie on his stomach and started massaging the spasming muscles around his lower back.

Duo moaned in pleasure as the pain eased. "Nothing to worry about. Just a stupid backache," he assured.

This was getting worrisome. Heero had noted Duo's backaches more frequently during the past few weeks but bit his lip from saying anything. Duo hated being fussed over and like it even less over something as small as a pain in the back. But Heero noticed that sometimes, the pain wasn't all that small. During the worse attacks, it kept the long haired man up at night. His tossing and turning while trying to find a most comfortable position to sleep on kept them both awake at night. Not that Heero minded if Duo had just said something to him, instead of trying to be brave about it and keeping it to himself. After all, Heero thought guiltily, Duo got hurt while seducing him. And that still brought on a silly grin whenever he thought about it.

"I think you should see a doctor about this," Heero said, still working on the tense muscles there.

Duo shrugged, face buried in a cushion. "Don't worry about it…"

"How the hell can I not?" Heero scolded. "This has been going on for weeks now, and sometimes, you can't sleep from the pain, can you?"

Duo turned over, sitting up. "I've always had a weak back, Heero." He seemed completely serious. Which he usually was when he was trying to tell Heero a secret, tell Heero about his past. Then he hid the expression with his normal jester smile. "That's what you get for trying to stop a bullet with your spinal cord."

Heero's fists clenched and his jaw worked hard. He hadn't seen any scars on Duo's body and thinking about it, the briaded man probably had them worked on. He had been informed casually once, scars, very much like tattoos were an easy target for identification. Duo had wanted to leave his past behind and his scars were his past, therefore, they had to go. He wasn't ashamed of his childhood, but the scars were something he didn't want to see every time he looked into the mirror.

Just as fast as the moment came, it was gone and Duo was all grins and smiles again. Heero sighed inwardly, wondering when the masks would come down between them. The only time Duo was every completely comfortable, Heero noted with no small amount of jealousy, was when he was with Wufei. Heero wanted to be the one that put the expression of ease onto his boyfriend's face, to see him completely relax, to see the expression of complete openness. No masks, no walls, just the boy behind the carefully constructed man.

"Relena is coming back today?" Duo asked, though it wasn't really a question. He looked like he was caught between excitement and dread.

Heero almost smiled. Confrontation with Relena meant sex for the first time but it also meant facing down the one person that had stalked Duo so relentlessly. He thought Duo was more than a little intimidated by his ex-fiancée.

"Yup," Heero nodded. Just then his cell phone rang, scaring the hell out of the both of them. The two stared at each other, as if unable to process what to do. It continued to ring while the two continued to stare.

"I think," Duo croaked, his voice a few octaves higher from nervousness. He cleared his throat. "Answer it," he hissed finally.

Heero lifted his phone and showed Duo the caller ID that stated it was Relena. "Show time," he said, before pressing the answer key.

tbc…

Yoohoo!! Relena back to the fore! Wow, 70 reviews!! Thanks to all that read and reviewed this. Same reason for delay of update as mentioned in FC.