SCENE TWO- School Time is Cool Time... Sort Of
(CUT TO: the Happyland school. All of the children who attended last time are there, with the exception of the Olsen twins, since they're dead. DEAD, DEAD, DEAD, DEAD, DEAD.)
Narrator 1: And now we go back to the Happyland school, where Sandy is happily teaching her four students.
Narrator 2: Yes, her three children and Rini. (CUT TO: CLOSE UP: SANDY teaching TOMMY, MICHELLE, the CHANGELING BOY, and RINI.)
Narrator 1: About, um...
(CUT TO: STORM teaching GINNY, KIM, HERMIA and GERDA.)
Narrator 1: And Storm.
Narrator 2: Storm has decided to let Ginny take over the class for the day. (GINNY gets out of her desk and takes her place at the front of the classroom.)
Narrator 1: So she can teach magic. (Suddenly all the students have wands.)
Ginny: Everyone, swish and flick. (Everyone uses their wands to swish and flick.)
Kim, Hermia and Gerda: (chorusing as they swish and flick) Swish and flick.
Ginny: Now say "wingardium leviosa".
Kim, Hermia and Gerda: Wingardium leviosa.
Ginny: Now do both at the same time.
Kim, Hermia and Gerda: (swishing and flicking with their wands) Wingardium leviosa.
Narrator 2: They learned this... not very quickly.
Narrator 1: (very seriously) Because they didn't have any magic powers.
Narrator 2: They were just sort of learning it.
Ginny: And now we have the history of magic. (begins to lecture about the history of magic)
Narrator 1: This droned on for about five more hours.
(A sign appears saying "FIVE HOURS LATER")
Ginny: Swish and flick. Got it?
Kim: (raises her hand) We've been over this for like five hours.
Ginny: You're my friend, shut up.
Kim: (Offended) Fine, well, I'm voting for Princess Mia.
Ginny: You do that...
(CUT TO: SANDY's class.)
Narrator 2: And meanwhile Sandy had a very important announcement to make.
Sandy: (to her class) Everybody, pay attention. Pay close attention. We're having a bake sale! (overly ecstatic over a stupid bake sale.) To raise money.
Tommy, Michelle, and the Changeling Boy: Ooh, yay!
Rini: (rolls her eyes) I'm depressed.
Michelle: You got it, dude.
Sandy: Anyway we're having a bake sale. So everyone bring your parents. (stops, realizes she is the parent of three of her four students. To RINI) Rini, bring Serena. And BUY COOKIES. Buy lots and lots of cookies. (hypnotically) Buy cookies, buy cookies...
(SANDY goes into STORM's classroom)
Sandy: Everybody... (sees GINNY) Ginny, why are you teaching the class? (shrugs, to STORM) Have you told them yet? (STORM shakes her head no.) Ok, then I will. (to the class, GINNY has returned to her seat) Everyone, we're having a bake sale this Thursday.
Hermia: (raises her hand) Thursday? How many days is that in?
Sandy: Three.
Hermia, Kim, Ginny and Gerda: (exclaiming, to each other) Three days?!?!?! Three days?!?!?!? Etc. etc. Three days! Oh my god. Three days!
Narrator 1: They all jumped with antici...pation cause the bake sale was in three days.
Narrator 2: Over in Tzeitel's barn, she heard them saying three days and joined in.
Hermia, Kim, Ginny, Gerda and Tzeitel: (exclaiming to each other) Three days?!?!?! Three days?!?! We have to be out in three days?!?!?! Those stupid Russians.
Narrator 2: Tzeitel said that last part about the Russians, cause she was still sad the Russians made her family leave Anatevka in three days.
Sandy: And Rini gets to move up to the big kid class, cause you've learned enough in the little kids class. (RINI gets excited and runs out of the little kids class into the big kids class.)
Rini: Yay! Wingardium leviosa! (pronounces it wrong.)
Ginny: You're saying it wrong. It's "wingardium leviosa". (pronounces it correctly) Swish and flick.
Rini: Oh, shut up.
Ginny: Alohamora!
(something explodes)
Ginny: I think we'll need another feather. (anime sweat drop)
Storm: Ok, not funny.
(CUT TO: the Happyland school. All of the children who attended last time are there, with the exception of the Olsen twins, since they're dead. DEAD, DEAD, DEAD, DEAD, DEAD.)
Narrator 1: And now we go back to the Happyland school, where Sandy is happily teaching her four students.
Narrator 2: Yes, her three children and Rini. (CUT TO: CLOSE UP: SANDY teaching TOMMY, MICHELLE, the CHANGELING BOY, and RINI.)
Narrator 1: About, um...
(CUT TO: STORM teaching GINNY, KIM, HERMIA and GERDA.)
Narrator 1: And Storm.
Narrator 2: Storm has decided to let Ginny take over the class for the day. (GINNY gets out of her desk and takes her place at the front of the classroom.)
Narrator 1: So she can teach magic. (Suddenly all the students have wands.)
Ginny: Everyone, swish and flick. (Everyone uses their wands to swish and flick.)
Kim, Hermia and Gerda: (chorusing as they swish and flick) Swish and flick.
Ginny: Now say "wingardium leviosa".
Kim, Hermia and Gerda: Wingardium leviosa.
Ginny: Now do both at the same time.
Kim, Hermia and Gerda: (swishing and flicking with their wands) Wingardium leviosa.
Narrator 2: They learned this... not very quickly.
Narrator 1: (very seriously) Because they didn't have any magic powers.
Narrator 2: They were just sort of learning it.
Ginny: And now we have the history of magic. (begins to lecture about the history of magic)
Narrator 1: This droned on for about five more hours.
(A sign appears saying "FIVE HOURS LATER")
Ginny: Swish and flick. Got it?
Kim: (raises her hand) We've been over this for like five hours.
Ginny: You're my friend, shut up.
Kim: (Offended) Fine, well, I'm voting for Princess Mia.
Ginny: You do that...
(CUT TO: SANDY's class.)
Narrator 2: And meanwhile Sandy had a very important announcement to make.
Sandy: (to her class) Everybody, pay attention. Pay close attention. We're having a bake sale! (overly ecstatic over a stupid bake sale.) To raise money.
Tommy, Michelle, and the Changeling Boy: Ooh, yay!
Rini: (rolls her eyes) I'm depressed.
Michelle: You got it, dude.
Sandy: Anyway we're having a bake sale. So everyone bring your parents. (stops, realizes she is the parent of three of her four students. To RINI) Rini, bring Serena. And BUY COOKIES. Buy lots and lots of cookies. (hypnotically) Buy cookies, buy cookies...
(SANDY goes into STORM's classroom)
Sandy: Everybody... (sees GINNY) Ginny, why are you teaching the class? (shrugs, to STORM) Have you told them yet? (STORM shakes her head no.) Ok, then I will. (to the class, GINNY has returned to her seat) Everyone, we're having a bake sale this Thursday.
Hermia: (raises her hand) Thursday? How many days is that in?
Sandy: Three.
Hermia, Kim, Ginny and Gerda: (exclaiming, to each other) Three days?!?!?! Three days?!?!?!? Etc. etc. Three days! Oh my god. Three days!
Narrator 1: They all jumped with antici...pation cause the bake sale was in three days.
Narrator 2: Over in Tzeitel's barn, she heard them saying three days and joined in.
Hermia, Kim, Ginny, Gerda and Tzeitel: (exclaiming to each other) Three days?!?!?! Three days?!?! We have to be out in three days?!?!?! Those stupid Russians.
Narrator 2: Tzeitel said that last part about the Russians, cause she was still sad the Russians made her family leave Anatevka in three days.
Sandy: And Rini gets to move up to the big kid class, cause you've learned enough in the little kids class. (RINI gets excited and runs out of the little kids class into the big kids class.)
Rini: Yay! Wingardium leviosa! (pronounces it wrong.)
Ginny: You're saying it wrong. It's "wingardium leviosa". (pronounces it correctly) Swish and flick.
Rini: Oh, shut up.
Ginny: Alohamora!
(something explodes)
Ginny: I think we'll need another feather. (anime sweat drop)
Storm: Ok, not funny.