Longest Novel: Fall of The Republic

by morgan kingsley

In 2020, a middle-aged author, living too deeply in the past, decides to write the story of what really happened to him and his friends when he was younger, and as it unfolds, a giant conspiracy starts to show itself. An AU of seasons 1-4 that take place in the United States. Crossover with several other series for one overall universe. New episodes every SECOND Friday

33. The Final Son

Chapter 3 One Girl With Ten brothers

Episode 1 The Final Son

Scene 1: August 22, 2020 12:29 pm

Dear T.K. Shioda: Hey, so I am not sure if you are going to be getting these messages. But I feel like I certainly need to try. Regardless, my name is Todd Robinson Jr. That name might be familiar with you. You worked with my father back in the day. Well, ever since then, he ended up having eleven children. Ten boys and one girl.

I guess that I might as well go over what each of the eleven of us are like, so that way you have a mild idea what you are getting yourself into. So I am the oldest of the six. Twenty years old, and probably the most bland of them all. Still haven't gotten a job, and flunked out of college, and have been making money off of Twitch for the last two years or so by streaming three days a week.

The second oldest is Gabe. Eighteen years old. On his final year of high school, and has been working on trying to get a scholarship for a certain college, although I have been kind of thinking that in all honesty, he might not actually get the scholarship. He might not be the smartest person around, but he is probably the nicest of us all.

Third is Josiah. Fifteen years old, and early on in his high school years. He is rather popular, and has been working on music a lot lately. I feel like he will probably try to make that his main fucking thing in school. To be honest, I feel like out of all the siblings, he will probably the most likely to actually go the distance in the long run.

The fourth oldest is Seth. Eleven years old, and has been trying really hard to make a career out of comedy. He has been going to the park every Friday to give off some performances. Shockingly enough, as the weeks pass, he seems to be getting a bit of a audience. Although mainly from people even younger than him.

Jack is the next one after Seth. He is nine years old, and his main thing is trying to get into sports. Despite being as young as he is, he already is making more progress in athletics than I ever have. His main one is basketball, at least for the time,

The next one is Lydia. She is the only girl in the bunch. At seven years old, she is just starting school this year. To be honest, I feel some worry about how she will be able to adapt to school over time. I feel like she might not be ready for it. Especially when you have ten brothers, and a seventy year old father, and the family just gets associated with that.

After Lydia is Henry. He is five years old. Not much to say about him yet. Although he seems to be a bit into horror movies that are well beyond his age so far. In all honesty, I am not really excited about it. But it seems like a harmless interest, for the time being. So I am not going to be making too much of a issue about it.

Dylan is the oldest of the two twins. He is just three years old. So he has no real personality yet. But he has been rather interested in watching things such as me and my dad working on the cars in our house. So I am starting to assume that maybe he might start to get into that in the long run.

Drake is the younger of the two twins. He and Dylan don't really seem to hang out with each other nearly as much as they should given the fucking age. He has been watching a lot of television so far, which is what people his age should honestly be doing.

Calvin is the next one, and the second youngest one, and the youngest of the ones that have been alive for a while. He is two years old, and being only a year younger than the twins, he has seemed to be getting along with them more than most of the other siblings, and he has started to form full sentences, and has been walking a lot more lately.

The final one is Ridge. He was just born this morning, at 1 in the morning. In all honesty, his birth today was the main thing that decided to motivate me to even begin writing this in the first place. I just feel like I want to make sense of the shit in this town before he gets old enough to realize the shit going on here as well.

My parents have both confirmed that they were done after Ridge. Honestly, I believe what they are saying this time. From the way they are acting about the subject, I don't think they are going to be fucking lying about the subject this time.

I was sitting down, and I was talking with Seth. We were just sort of thinking about how life was going to be like with Ridge around. But as this happened, there was a loud grinding noise that had gone off. I rubbed my eyes, annoyed as all hell.

"Not even twelve hours old yet, and Ridge is already having to deal with those fucking annoying lumber men working." I said, since that was my assumption on what these people were doing. Seth looked at me, as if finding my comment hilarious.

"Do you seriously fucking think that those are lumbermen working there? Why in the world would girls go missing afterwards then?" Seth asked, and then I was shaking my head. I was not really in the mood to be hearing him talk about this. He always acted like he was smarter than me here.

"A really fucking bad coincidence." I said, shaking my head. I was tired of everybody making giant theories over something that really at the end of the day was probably not that big of a deal at all.

"Sorry, I should not be making a big deal out of this. I just thought it was interesting is all." Seth said, and I was clearly able to tell that he was trying to say that to make the tension between the two of us at least slightly less bad. He must have seen I was upset.

"Yeah, I think we need to just focus on Ridge right now. I mean, I bet that mom and dad would not appreciate it is I was talking about this on the day that he is born. Dad would probably say 'wait until he's at least forty eight hours old before you talk about this.'" I said, and then I was laughing at this statement.

"I wonder if mom and dad are actually meaning it when they said that they are done with it after this. I mean, it seems like every time they have a child, they want to say that, but then they keep changing their mind every few years." After he was telling me this, I shrugged, simply not in the mood to have this discussion right now.

I stood up, and Seth was following me. I was kind of annoyed with this guy right now. He was probably just trying to harass me right now. And in all honesty, I was feeling like whenever he did this, he was showing that he hardly even fucking cared what in the world I was even fucking doing at all.

"So Todd, are you still searching for jobs right now? I mean, I know it is none of my business, but I have to admit, it can get pretty annoying hearing mom and dad constantly talk about it." He said, and then I sighed, and I felt like him saying this was just a way to piss me off.

"I mean, I still put in applications every Tuesday and Thursday. Mom and dad seemed to kind of let go of the streaming thing on Monday, Wednesday's and Fridays. Probably because of the fact that at least I am doing something productive with that, and do get about twenty dollars a day via donations." I said, and Seth sighed at this, not wanting to argue. Even though that meant I was still only earning 4 dollars an hour as a result of twenty dollars.

"I think that at the end of the day, they are just hoping that either I make a bigger following on the streaming, of actually get a job." I said, and then I was shrugging, not sure what else to say. "To be honest, I do sort of see their perspective."

"Yeah, I think the main reason dad cares so much about it is because of his talks about retirement soon. It seems like this will be the last year he is going to work at that job." He said, and then I shrugged, not in the mood to talk about this. I felt like the fact that Seth was constantly talking about this was getting a bit annoying.

"Regardless, I was just kind of curious. In all honesty, I am fucking jealous of you. You know, being able to have a job, and not be forced to deal with school all the time." Seth said, and then I looked at him, and I was feeling like he was fucking insane for even saying that.

"Dude, are you fucking serious? You have summer for three months every year. That is something that you should be happy to have." I said, and I was shrugging, feeling like there was no need to fucking argue with him at this rate.

"I don't know. I mean, summers are nice. But being able to be my own person is something else that might be fine." As he was telling me this, I was sighing, feeling like whatever I was telling him was annoying the shit out of him right now.

"Seth, just take it from me right now. Appreciate the stuff you have right now, before it gets much worse." I said, and then I was sighing, feeling like there was nothing else that I could be able to fucking tell him. As we were saying this, that was when Lydia was showing up.

"Hey guys." Lydia said, and when we were looking at her, both of us started to get much happier with her. Seth was nodding, trying to not think about the grinding noise. "Are you guys excited for mommy and daddy having another kid?" She asked, and then Seth was shrugging, probably trying to pretend like he was neutral to this. But I was shrugging, feeling like I just needed to be more honest with the way that I felt.

"I am excited for the sibling, but I am worried that mom and dad might not be able to raise him too well. I mean, especially dad. After all, he is seventy years old. Which is why I truly believe them this time when they say he is done." I said, and then I was shrugging, not sure what to tell her.

"I am more excited for him then for the school year starting up. First grade…" Lydia said, and then Seth gave me a dagger look as she was saying this. I slowly nodded. I was taking what she was saying more serious. You know, due to the fact that she was in first grade.

"First grade can be a rather fucking hard grade. I just think that you need to take it one week at a time. Think of it this way. Once Friday hits, and you go home, you are done for two days. Not having to deal with shit from what teachers or whoever are telling you." I said, and then I was shrugging, feeling like I was needing to try and find a way to make her feel as good about this as possible.

As I was saying this, I was then seeing Lydia getting a much more serious look on her face. As I was looking at her, I was wondering what she was planning on telling me. "Guys, do you have any idea what is going on with that grinding noise?" After she asked us this, both Seth and I just immediately lost all hope on this discussion.

"Truth be told Lydia, I have no fucking idea. I feel like you might need to talk to dad about that. I mean, I've been hearing this my entire fucking life." I said, and then I was shrugging, hoping that telling her this would make her feel better.

"The noise is really fucking scary. It makes me start to get uncomfortable every time I hear it." She was telling me, and I was wondering what in the world I would even fucking say to make this whole thing feel any fucking different. "I almost forget about it every time it comes up, and then the fear comes back."

"Well, there is not much we can fucking do to change that." After Seth was telling her this, I looked at him, feeling like he needed to not be a ass with how he was fucking saying this in the first place. I felt like in all honesty, he would have said this so much fucking better.

"Seth, don't be an ass. She was just wanting to know what fucking happened." I said, and I was seeing Seth looking like he was actually shocked to be hearing me say this. Probably feeling like I needed to give him some fucking slack for at least being honest with her.

"Sorry. I wasn't trying to make things worse. But the truth is that nobody knows what that noise is. And thinking much about it will only make things worse." He was saying, and he was really fucking firm with what he was saying. I was feeling like he just wanted to get Lydia to just fucking calm down, and not be making things much worse for her.

"Sorry I asked. It just bothers me all the fucking time." She said, and then with that, I was starting to head to my car. As I was opening the door, both Seth and Lydia were looking kind of shocked with the fact that I was doing this in the first place.

"What are you doing?" Seth asked, and I shrugged, not sure what to tell him. In all honesty, it was not that much of a deal. I was going to just be with friends, and I hoped that they would just let me do this, and not get in my way.

"I am going to be with friends. I mean, I want to let them know that Ridge was fucking born." I said, and then I was starting to get inside the car. As I did this, I was seeing both Lydia and Seth seem just sort of out of it.

As I was gone, I was kind of feeling bad for just kind of up and leaving Lydia and Seth like that. But to be honest, I was feeling like I just needed to be fucking alone for now. When I was telling Carlos and Dan the news, I would just hope that they would at least pretend to be relatively excited for this.

Before long, I was at Carlos's front door. I knocked on it, and then Carlos answered. "Hey, you seem like you are kind of stressed." As he was saying this, I was sighing, and I was feeling like the he would be laughing at the way that I was reacting to something I knew was coming in the first place.

"I just wanted to let you be one of the first ones to know that Ridge was born today. I knew that it was going to be within this week or so. But to be honest, despite having to go through this ten times, it still feels fucking crazy to have another sibling." I said, and then Carlos was laughing at what I was saying. Probably feeling like I was putting too much emphasis on this.

"Well, I know you are going to do a great job as older brother. You always fucking do." After Carlos said this, I looked right at him, and I was shocked to hear him tell me this in the first place. But I was feeling like him telling me this was going to give me more confidence here.

"I mean, I feel like with the other siblings, they will be able to make up for my mistakes. I know that I wasn't all that great with the first couple of siblings. I feel like part of that was my anger at the fact that my mother was always more focused on when she would finally get a daughter." I said, and I was feeling like I needed to fucking let that go. In all honesty, she had come a decently long way, and needed more patience now.

"Yeah, but that was so many years ago that I am sure that Gabe, Josiah, and Seth probably do not even have any bad feelings towards you anymore." He was telling me this, and I was shrugging at this. Not too sure what in the world I was even going to fucking tell him.

"Honestly, I have no idea what I should be feeling telling you. But I guess that you might be right." I said, and then I had no idea what to even say now. There was no point in getting so fucking scared over this.

"And look at Lydia. She fucking worships you. Probably thinks you're like the coolest person ever." As he said that, I was laughing at this, thinking that what Lydia thought of me was something she would have to dramatically change really fucking soon.

"Yeah, I guess that is true." I said, and then I was smiling as he was saying this, thinking of what Lydia had been like earlier. In all honesty, the way that Lydia had treated me really changed the way that Iw as looking at everything.

"Got any plans for your twenty first birthday?" I asked, considering the fact that his birthday was in just a fucking week right now. Carlos looked excited at the fact that I had been bringing this whole thing up in the first place.

"Honestly, I am planning on just throwing a party. Getting all drunk and shit. Not really giving a single shit what everybody else in the world is thinking." As he was saying this, I was laughing, and I wondered what we were even going to do now.

"Well, I know that this might be a bit of a risk, but since Dan and I are turning twenty one within a year anyways, I feel like the worst we might get is a slap on the wrist." I said, and I was seeing Carlos looking like he was happy to see me admitting something like this in the first place.

"See, I know you are smart enough to fucking see this." Carlos said, and I was really not too sure what in the world I was even going to do to change this. I was smoking a cigarette, not sure what I was going to do.

"So glad that I haven't had to deal with people talk about annoying shit like the fucking election coming up in November. I know that it will probably be all the rage in a month. But after last election, where it was non stop every day for over a year, I'll fucking take it." After Carlos said that, I was smiling at this, knowing how much he did not enjoy discussing political shit.

"Even my father has talked about it less this time." I said, confirming what he said. Since my father used to talk about it all the time as well. Maybe at seventy, he just finally fucking gave up and stopped caring.

Scene 2: August 23 2020 3:21 pm

The next day, I was hanging out with Dan, and I was seeing him seem much more interested in things such as the grinding noise than Carlos and I had been. I was kind of annoyed with this, but I was choosing to not be making a fucking fight out of it at all.

"It happened again. I mean, I know that it is really not all that fucking big of a deal. It happens all the time. I am more worried about what is going to happen afterwards." Dan said, and I was looking at him, wondering what he was planning on doing right now.

"You mean, the missing girls?" I asked, and I was trying to pretend like I was not too worried about what was happening. As I was saying this, I was seeing Dan looking like he wished that I would take this much more fucking serious right now.

"Yeah, I mean, I know that I shouldn't be thinking too much about this at all. Truth be told right now, I feel like the fact that people just don't fucking take this seriously, kind of fucking pisses me off. This is something that is really fucking serious." After he was telling me this, I was sighing, not really in the mood to be hearing this right now.

"Are you fucking saying that you believe that I don't care about this enough?" I asked, and I was seeing Dan looking like he was kind of wanting to take back what he said. I was shaking my head, feeling like he was just kind of being a bit of a asshole here, when he was desperate to try and make his fucking point.

"I mean, I thought with Lydia, you would be acting much differently than you have right now. I thought you would have been running around like a fucking chicken with his head cut off." After Dan said that, I was shrugging, and I was simply feeling like I would leave the subject alone for the time being.

"Well, I just need to fucking think about what I would be doing if I was making a fucking scene out of this." After I was telling him this, I was trying to fucking hide my annoyance with this right now. I was smoking a cigarette, feeling no need to really push this issue any further.

"And besides, I feel like Lydia would not want me to be too worried about that. Especially with the fact that she doesn't know anything about the missing girls quite yet." I said, hoping that this fact would be able to get Dan to at least try and fucking calm down a bit.

"So did Carlos tell you about his plan for the party?" Dan asked, clearly just trying to change the fucking subject. He was probably feeling like the way that I was talking about this was kind of making him feel like I was attacking him right now.

"Yeah, he was planning on buying a shit ton of alcohol, and having a massive fucking party." I said, and then Dan was laughing at this, feeling like my statement was kind of hilarious. "What is so fucking funny about this?"

"I don't know. Just the fact that within the first day after he becomes legally old enough, he is already planning on breaking the fucking law, and letting us drink underage." Dan said, and he was laughing at this, and I was feeling like maybe it really was kind of funny. Despite not wanting to admit it.

"Well, I mean, to be honest, I think that with all the things going on in Wayside, most people start to just not care if people are starting to fucking break the law." I said, and then I was sighing, not really in the mood to be hearing this.

"True. So how do you feel about the fact that Lydia is going to be going to first grade soon? I mean, I am not wanting to bring it up again, since you seemed kind of pissed with the way that I brought it up the first time, but do you feel like she will learn about the grinding noise and what happens then?" Dan asked, and I was sighing, not wanting to think about it.

"I don't want to fucking think about it. I mean, I know that she will eventually learn about it. But I am just kind of hoping that she will not be thinking about it too much about it. That she will laugh at what she hears, and just tell people to stop fucking making jokes about it." I said, and I was trying to convince myself that this was what she was going to be like.

"Okay, if you fucking say so. I guess that you are just not wanting to think about it at all. I guess that I don't even fucking blame you for that." After Dan was telling me this, I decided that I would just drop the subject for the time being. Not wanting to push the matter forward.

As Dan was thinking about it for a second, I was thinking about how we were going to continue this subject, and not be making it much worse. "Do you know how well Benjamin had been taking this whole missing sister thing?" He asked, and I was sighing, not in the mood to hear it.

"Oh yeah. Fucking Benjamin…" I said, thinking about the fact that five years ago, his twelve year old sister went missing. He was a guy in our class, and he was the most outspoken person about it ever since. Almost to the point of annoyance, but I wasn't wanting to admit it.

"Yeah, I feel like maybe we should try and talk to him. He might not fucking like it. But after five years, and seeing how much it is still fucking hurting him, I just feel like I need to fucking try and talk to him here." After Dan was telling me this, I simply shrugged here.

"I mean, if you want to fucking do that, then you have every fucking right to be doing this. I just think that you need to be ready for if he doesn't want to have this discussion right now." After he was telling me this, I really had nothing to say to him.

"Would you be willing to fucking help me out with this?" He asked, and I was really having no idea what in the world I was going to even tell him. In all honesty, I really had no desire to be dealing with this at all.

"I have no idea dude. I mean, it is really not all that great of a idea. This could really be able to get us in danger right now." As he was telling me this, I really had no idea what I was even going to tell him at all. "I mean, I heard a lot of fucking stories about my father, and none of them make me think this is a good idea." I said, and I really had no idea what to feel about this.

"That shit was over fifty years ago. He probably doesn't even fucking think about this anymore." As he said this, I was really not in the mood to listen to him at all. He was kind of pissing me off, and there was no other way to say it.

As we were thinking, I couldn't believe that my friend was planning on getting involved with Benjamin. I was not in the mood to deal with this. If he wanted a death sentence, that was his choice. But I was not in the mood to deal with this shit at all. No matter how rude I was being here.

Scene 3: August 24 2020 4:02 pm

I was getting ready for my Monday recording, the first one since Ridge was born, and as I was getting ready, Jack was talking to me. "So when are you going to be ordering the pizza?" After Jack asked me this, I was sighing, and I was getting kind of annoyed with the fact that he was constantly getting on my fucking case about it.

"In just a few fucking minutes. I was just thinking about a conversation that I was having with Dan yesterday. And in all honesty, I was starting to really let it sink in a bit, what he was saying." I said, and then I was seeing Jack looking like he was hardly fucking caring what I was wanting to tell her here.

"What did he want to talk to you about?" Jack asked, and I was looking at him, shocked to be hearing him have any fucking interest in what I was even talking about. I was feeling like he was just trying to get way too deep with all of this shit, and in all honesty, I was kind of not really in the mood to deal with any of this at all.

"Just about one of our classmates, and how much he had been affected when his younger sister went missing five years ago. Honestly, I can't blame him or anything. But I just feel like the fact that Dan wants to get involved is kind of hard to fucking handle." I was telling Jack, and as I said that to him, I really had no idea why in the world I was even having this discussion with him in the first place.

"Oh sorry. Forget that I even fucking mentioned it." Jack said, and then I was slowly nodding, as I pulled out my fucking phone, and then I made the pizza order, and I was feeling like Jack just needed to fucking accept the fact that these conversations were way out of his fucking league right now.

I decided to walk outside, and have a cigarette there. My parents have given up on the smoking after I hit twenty, but they did put their foot down that I needed to at least be outside when I was doing it. That was a fair deal, in my mind.

As we were waiting for a bit, Jack came outside with me, and then he looked at me, thinking of something to say, to help me out. "Are you still willing to help me with my sports? I mean, I know you are not that excited to fucking help me. But I just feel like I need it." After Jack was telling me this, I was really having no idea what I could tell him.

"I mean, I guess that I could be able to still do so. I mean, you are still much better at sports than I am. But I mean, I think you need to learn how to handle losing much better than you already have." I said, feeling like I was needing to be totally honest with him right now.

"I mean, I am the best person in my grade, and people are just fucking unable to fucking appreciate that." After Jack was telling me this, I was feeling like there was nothing that I could be able to say to him to make the situation any different.

"You might be the best person in your grade, but you're still in the third grade. You need to remember that at the end of the day. Like how I am aware that Seth has made great progress with his comedy, but he is just a sixth grade middle schooler." After I was telling him this, I saw Jack was not wanting to hear this at all.

Before too long, the pizza delivery was pulling up. As I was watching the girl walk out of the car, I was noticing who she was, and I was feeling a bit of a strange feeling inside, feeling like I just wanted to fucking talk with her for a while.

"Hey Todd, it's been forever since I've seen you." She said, and smiled widely. I was so fucking happy to see her looking excited here. "How has life after high school been for you?" She asked, and I shrugged, feeling like I just needed to be honest with her.

"Playing games for a living, and only making like seventy dollars a week. Nothing too big. What grade are you?" I asked, and then Bebe smiled, glad to be seeing that I was willing to even fucking pretend like I was willing to talk to her about this.

"Senior year. Same grade as your brother Gabe. Honestly, it's been a hard two years since you graduated. You always were one of the funniest people in the school." Bebe said, and I was shocked to hear her admit this.

"I've been here for about two weeks so far. Just trying to make some money for when I fucking graduate." After she said that, I was slowly nodding, feeling like I would listen to what she was saying. "I always wanted to go to college. But now that it is less than a year away, I am starting to kind of regret my fucking choice."

"Bebe, if you do not want to go, and you just want to fucking work on a job, then I am sure that your parents will be more than willing to fucking go along with this." I said, and then I was remembering the conversations that we had back in high school.

It was extremely fucking obvious that Bebe liked me a lot at the time. She might have tried to fucking hide it. But I noticed it. The reason I was able to notice it was because I liked her too. I just didn't want to ask her, because she was only sixteen years old, and I was eighteen already and graduating high school. I didn't want to create any legal issues.

"I know that you're right. But I just feel like after all this set up, I should just fucking go along with what I fucking promised for once." She said, and shrugged, seeming to be kind of out of it at this point. I felt like I just needed to find something to say. To make her feel any fucking better at all.

I was feeling like now that this was going to possibly be my only chance soon, and that she was old enough, I felt like I just needed to go along with fucking asking her out. "So fucking Bebe, I was wondering if you would want to go out on a fucking date with me." I said, and then I was seeing Bebe looking shocked at what I was saying. But as I said this, she was smiling deeply at this.

"Oh…" Bebe said, and I was seeing her looking like her mind was running at a trillion miles per fucking hour. "Yeah, I would fucking love that." She said, and I was smiling at this, knowing that she finally was willing to make this work out. I needed that more than anything else.

When the pizza was done, and I was done with my conversations with Jack and Bebe, I went down, and pulled out my game, typed in what I was playing that Monday, and realized that with the time I started, I would be able to get nearly an extra hour more than I already would. Which I knew that extra four to five dollars would be able to be a giant fucking help.

"Hey guys, how are you today? I know that I am a bit early, but I guess that I just wanted to play a bit more. My brother Ridge was born on Saturday at 1:18 am, so I will probably have to be watching him a bit early on." I said, referring to the whole baby sitting idea. But I still needed to fucking stream, to make this whole thing work.

"In all honesty, this weekend has been so crazy that I kind of forgot what we were doing in the game earlier. I might need some help with remembering what was going on." I said, feeling like I just needed to be straight up real with them here.

"Guys, I might be going on a date soon. I saw a girl who I asked out, and she said that she was willing to on Thursday. If I actually go on this date, I will tell you all about it." I said, and I was smiling, thinking that maybe there was a chance to have some fucking love. As silly as the idea of love really fucking had been.

As I saw that, I was seeing that my four viewers were already starting to make some comments. As I was seeing this, I smiled, and I was so fucking proud of what I had done. I was getting an audience. And I was feeling so fucking excited with the fact that I would finally make some form of a living on this right now.

Scene 4: August 25 2020 1:09 am

I was trying to get ready to go to bed that night, and I was wanting to smoke a cigarette really fucking badly. Despite the fact that I was making a lot of good progress, and I was feeling like my time wasn't being wasted, I was feeling like I could have been doing a lot more with my life.

I mean, in two years since high school, the biggest thing I accomplished was my date that I might be able to get with Bebe on Thursday. If that was the biggest thing that I could say I accomplished, then let me tell you that this was a really bad resume for the first two years after high school.

But the worst part was that I knew that if I tried to talk about it to other people, and tried to get people to actually listen to me, they would brush off every single word of what I said. As if I wasn't allowed to fucking feel this way.

I went to my living room, and I was going to my computer, where I was opening up a job application to one of the last places that I had not applied to yet. Which was the video store down town. As I was placing in the information, I was sighing. There was only so many times I could place in things like my date of birth, my fucking prior work, and other shit, without losing my patience.

I was just feeling like I was just doing the same shit over and over again. Not getting any results differently. It took me about twenty five or so minutes to fill it out, before I was done, and submitted it, and then I walked outside, and took out a cigarette. Thinking about the fact that Bebe and I were going on a date.

I knew there was no way in hell that the fucking video store was going to accept my application. I wasn't fucking stupid. They were probably going to be looking at it for a moment before tossing it aside completely, and going to somebody else.

Once I was starting to settle down a bit, that was when Gabe was walking up to me, and I was seeing him looking like he was just feeling like there was no fucking choice but to have this discussion with me right now. "Sheldon, I feel like I need to talk to you about the stuff you talked with Lydia about earlier." Gabe said, and I looked at him, wondering what to even tell him.

"I'm not really in the fucking mood right now. Look, she is going to just have to see how school is for her own fucking sake." I said, and then Gabe was shaking his head, not really caring about something like that.

"I am talking about what you were telling her with the grinder. Honestly dude, I have no idea why in the world you even tell her that. I mean, sooner or later, she is going to grow older, and want to know what is happening." Gabe said, and then I was shrugging, and I was simply not really in the mood to hear him tell me this.

"Well, that is something she needs to be choosing on her own. I have no idea why you are so worried about what I told her here. If she wants to know the truth one day, then that is her choice. But for now, I feel like she needs to not worry about that." I said, and I was shrugging.

"You know, I feel like the fact that so many people fucking believe that something so horrible needs to be looked into here kind of just confuses me. I mean, I know that the timing might be suspicious. But shit fucking happens." I said, and started to head towards my car.

"Well, what the fucking hell are you going to be doing? Just driving around, and pretending like nothing fucking happened. Maybe this is why you are having a hard time really fitting in. Because you are denying what is literally right in front of you?" He asked, and I looked at him, wondering what his point was.

"I just got a date earlier. With Bebe. If I wasn't getting anybody to like me, then that wouldn't fucking happen." I said, feeling like I just needed to try and fucking tell him off. As I said this, I was seeing Gabe actually fucking consider what I said for a second.

"Oh wow. I wasn't expecting you to actually fucking go through with that at all." He said, and then I looked right at him, and I was shrugging, feeling no need to talk about this much longer. I was opening up the car door, and I was sighing.

"Look Gabe, I understand that I am not perfect. I never pretended to be though. So I am having a issue seeing what the fucking problem was." I said, and then I was getting in the car, feeling no need to have this discussion for too much longer.

I was getting in my car, and not wanting to deal with this any more. I mean, when my fucking siblings were constantly judging me, for no fucking reason, then I was feeling like I just needed to fucking be alone for once.

The entire time that I was driving, I was wondering if what my siblings were saying was fucking true. After all, girls had bene going missing before. But at the same time, there had to have been a fucking answer behind it all. Surely there was something bringing this together.

I mean, my father was always telling me that nothing was fucking happening in the first place. And he was somebody who had grown up in this town. So the truth was that there was a good chance that he might have been telling me the fucking truth right now.

I wondered why my siblings, and other people, were just not fucking trusting me, and not trusting the fact that I fucking knew what I was talking about. It was seeming like they fucking knew that there was nothing going on in this town, and that they were just truing to pretend like there was, to explain the fact that sometimes, shit just fucking happened.

I wondered if Ridge would grow up one day, wondering what was going on with this grinding noise, and he was going to be accusing people in this town that they were just behind some fucking conspiracy, like Gabe and other fucking family members had by this point.

I eventually went to the high school again, where I was parking the car, and I was remembering a conversation that I had with Bebe, before I graduated. A conversation that helped seal my feelings towards the woman, in a way I never thought possible.

We were sitting down on the benches at the high school track, and I was seeing Bebe looking kind of worried about what to tell me. "In all honesty, the last time that the grinding noise went off, I started to get scared that I was the one who was going to be going missing. Now I knew that it's silly, but I mean, it will happen to me one day right?" She asked, glancing at me for a second.

"Honestly Bebe, you have nothing to fucking worry about right now. There is no way that they will be targeting you. I mean, your parents are too big to take the risk." I said, and the I was seeing Bebe trying to look like she was finding my comments to be helpful, but in all honesty were kind of feeling unsure.

"I wish that you were right. I mean, it just scares me though. Knowing that there are people who have been going missing this whole time, and there is no answer. That is why I plan on leaving Wayside as soon as I graduated." Bebe said, and looked right at me, wondering what I would say.

"Well, I think that you need to have a plan on what you would actually do once you leave Wayside?" I asked, and then I was seeing Bebe smile as she was really happy to hear that despite how much I was trying to act otherwise, I was still showing a interest in her progress.

"Truth be told, I actually went in and made that application that I was talking to you about. I wasn't really sure if I wanted to, but I decided I needed to fucking take the leap of faith." Bebe said, and then I was shocked at her statement. "I mean, I know you graduate in a few weeks. And I am going to miss our weekly sessions out here."

"Well, I am just going to the community college. I have the next two terms lined up. If I fail at it, I will probably just drop out and work on something else. Something that can keep my mind at bay." After I was telling her this, I shrugged.

"Why would you send this application though? I mean, you still have two fucking years to go until you graduate." I said, and then Bebe was sighing, seeming to not really want to hear me mention that to her.

"Yeah, I fucking know Todd. But I feel like I would rather get the ball rolling than not. And in all honesty, two years can really fly by here. I already saw that when I went through my first two years of high school like this." After she was telling me this, I sighed, and I was choosing to not bother with her statements right now.

"Sorry. I just am concerned for you is all." I said, and then I was smiling at her, and I was feeling expressing my concern was a way to get her to see that at the end of the day, I was not some heartless person who never cared. I just had a hard time showing that care.

When I was done thinking about it, I wondered what I was even doing. I mean, I knew there was a good chance that this was all bullshit. In fact, it was far more likely than not that it all was. But what if it wasn't? What if there was actual truth to what was going on?

Scene 5: August 26 2020 1:47 pm

I was sitting down, and I was trying to get things ready, and I was getting a call from Dan. I answered right away, feeling like I would just see what was going on in his mind. I had no interest in really knowing everything. Especially if it was related to Benjamin. But I felt like I would at least try and make it work.

"Hey Todd, I was hoping that you would be able to help me out a bit." As he said this, I was sighing, since I was really not wanting to fucking do this at all. I knew right away what his plan was, and I was going to just try and get out of it right away.

"What do you need?" I asked, pretending like this was something I didn't know immediately about. And I was feeling like I would need to give him a fucking chance after all.

"I was talking with Benjamin earlier today. Look, I know that you made it clear that you have no interest on working on that at all. I get it. But I am still feeling the need to talk to him anyways." He said, and then I was sighing, feeling slightly annoyed with what he had been saying.

"But I was feeling like I would need to get your fucking help here." After he was saying this, I was feeling like he needed to fucking back off, and not be pushing this shit onto me at all. "I just feel like I am not able to let this keep going on for much longer at all."

"What the fucking hell Dan? I mean, you are living a perfectly good life right now, and you are throwing this away?" I asked, and I was kind of not even wanting to bother hiding my annoyance at him. "I think you need to let this fucking thing go. Nobody you know has gone missing."

"Damn it Todd. Why can't you take this more seriously? I mean, there is nothing wrong with what I want to do. Just come on over, and fucking help me out with talking to the guy." Dan said, and then he hung up the phone, and I looked at the time.

Okay, I still had three and a half hours before my stream started. I was fine for now. I just wished that this was something I never had to deal with. So with that, I got in my car, and I started to head on towards Dan's house. Cursing his name under my breath every single fucking step of the way, since this was so fucking insane.

Once I was at Dan's house, I would see him, and I would try and plead with him to stop this fucking shit about looking into the case's, and the missing girls. I had no fucking interest in doing this. Not because of a lack of caring. But because people would fucking die if I let this get any worse.

I knocked on his door several times, and when he answered, I was seeing him looking relatively shocked to see that I did actually turn out. "Oh shit, I was wondering if you would just flake out on me, given your complete lack of interest in the subject." He said, and I was feeling like I was kind of a asshole when he said that to me.

"Oh dude, fucking just stop with that shit. I want to fucking help you. Even if I have no interest in helping Benjamin." I said, and started to head to my car, and then I looked at Dan, wondering what he even fucking knew about this in the first place.

"Where is he anyways?" I asked, feeling like I would just need to be patient. Dan closed the door, feeling like my lack of showing care was something that really did fucking bother him right now. But he was just choosing to not fucking say anything at all.

"I think he works at the local gas station, as a cashier." After he said that, I laughed at the irony. I knew my fathers best friend in high school was obsessed with this case as well, and worked at the gas station for god knows how fucking long.

But I was choosing to keep the commentary to myself, and not be a jackass. As I was starting to drive over there, I was feeling like I just needed to try and be patient with Dan. I knew his heart was in the right place. I looked at him though, feeling like I just needed to talk to him clearly. "Look Dan, Carlos turns twenty one in three days. I am putting my foot down when I say that during his birthday, I need you to fucking stop with this bullshit. I have ten younger siblings I need to watch out for."

As I was telling him this, I was seeing Dan looking like I was still kind of attacking him as I was saying this. But I needed him to fucking get it. I needed him to see that he was going too far with this shit. And that I was beyond my point of patience.

Once we were in the parking lot, I was sighing and I was feeling like I just needed to try and fucking be nice about what I was saying. "Look, I know full well that you have great intentions. But this is fucking insane dude. This is beyond the point of reason."

"Okay. Yeah, you're right. During the party, I need to just try and keep this shit to myself." After he was telling me this, I was glad to be hearing him actually take what I was saying relatively seriously, and not be acting like I was a asshole for this. So we got out of the car, ready to talk to Benjamin.

He was looking at me, and I was seeing that he was clearly much less excited to see me. Probably because of the fact that in the three years since his younger sister vanished, I never really hid that this whole thing was a bit much for me. And in all honesty, I was kind of feeling bad for the way that I had acted around him.

"Hey Benjamin, I just wanted to talk for a bit." Dan said, and then Benjamin was sighing, and sat down, took a cigar out, and I was seeing how horribly he had aged in the two years since high school. He was only three months older than me (due to him being a January birthday, and I'm April 12), but in all honesty, he looked like he would have passed off for three years older.

"What would people have to say about me that hasn't been said a million fucking times? Especially from your friend over there? I am a freak who is too stuck on the idea of finding somebody who will never fucking return." Benjamin said, and when he said it with such venom, I already felt some regret over what I was telling him.

"Look dude, I just want to fucking help you out right now? I understand that you are still dealing with your younger sister going missing. I don't expect you to just get over it in time." After Dan was saying this, he was sighing, feeling like he needed to word his point really fucking carefully here.

"I want to know if you had made any progress on finding her, and if you need any help on making it work?" Dan said, and then Benjamin was looking mildly shocked. He was looking like he was barely keeping his cigar in, and I was smiling at his reaction here. It was really fucking funny.

"Nothing honestly. That is the part that kills me the most. I have made no fucking progress finding her, and I feel like some of the statements being made about me being a fucking loon or whatever might be true." Benjamin said, and I was feeling like I just needed to try and fucking find something else to say now.

"I mean, every year it seems like I have one new hint that might fucking finally help me out. Make sense of this shit. But then it just goes to fucking waste. I feel like I am going nowhere with it, and nobody seems to even fucking care anymore." He said, and he was hoping that Dan didn't try and get smart with him, and act like what he was saying was this horrid statement.

"I would be interested in getting to know all the evidence that you have fucking gathered up." After Dan was telling Benjamin this, I saw Benjamin looking like he was kind of considering what he was hearing. Almost seeming to actually want to fucking run with it, this was the case.

"Well, I guess I might as well just fucking tell you what I have been able to figure out." He said, and then he looked at me, as if still feeling like he was needing to just get to know what I was planning on doing here.

"What are you going to be doing here? I mean, you still have the perfect fucking family. Eight younger brothers, and a fucking sister." Benjamin was telling me, and I was feeling really at unease with the way that he had been acting towards me right now.

"Nine now. I had a new brother born four days ago." I said, and then I was smiling at him, hoping that he would at least pretend to be happy with me. But then with that, I shook my fucking head, and moved on. "Anyways, I mean, I have no real interest in this investigation. I'll be one hundred percent real when I say that. But I do want to protect my friends." I said, and then I was seeing Benjamin looking like he almost respected my honesty.

"And if getting involved in something I really don't have any interest for, is the best way to protect them, then I will fucking do it." I said, and I was feeling like there was no need to go any further with what I was saying.

"Okay. I do respect the fact that you're not trying to just give me shit right now, and act like you had a massive change of heart." He said, and then I was sighing, and I wondered if he was willing to even fucking pretend like he didn't dislike me or whatever.

"And I will be honest. I guess with my younger sister now going into first grade herself, I guess that I will say that I might be faintly more interested than I was at one point. Just seeing if there is any truth to what is happening." I said, and I was feeling like as long as I was no longer bullshitting with him, then things would be better.

"So if you guys want to throw your fucking lives away to figure out something that should have been found out by now, then when would you want to do this?" Benjamin asked, finally finishing his cigar, and I was feeling like I needed to put myself first this time. Even if it was a bit selfish.

"I have a date tomorrow. If you guys want to discuss this. Then can you fucking wait until Friday?" I asked, and I was feeling like the more that I was putting my fucking foot down, and I was showing that there was still a line that needed to be drawn, the better that things would fucking be.

"Okay, I guess that I can fucking wait a extra day." After Benjamin was saying this, he was shaking his head, and he was sounding like he was actually kind of pissed with the fact that I had said this. As if thinking that I was just showing my colors as a uncaring friend again.

"I mean, I hope you guys are right about this. Because if you're not, then that means that everything that people have tried to work on for years has been a fucking lie, the conspiracies have been made for no fucking reason." I said, and then I was shaking my head, feeling like I was just needing to be honest with them.

As I was heading out, this was when Dan was stopping me with a question. "Who are you going on a date with anyways?" He asked, and then I looked at him, and I was sighing, not really in the mood to be having this discussion right now.

"Bebe Santiago." I said, and then both Dan and Benjamin were looking shocked that I was going on a date with a girl who was only a senior in high school. But thankfully it seemed like neither of them were going to be saying it, which made me feel slightly better.

"I mean, I guess that this is none of my business. Never mind that I fucking asked." Dan asked, and he was shrugging, feeling like there was no point in dragging a issue out any further. I went to my car, and I was feeling like I was going to be losing my fucking mind.

I mean, I was glad that Dan was having something he cared about. I really was. But at the same time, I was feeling like this whole fucking thing was a fucking farce. And I was not even going to fucking try and hide it. This was going to possibly get him killed, and I wanted nothing to do with that at all.

As I was driving off, I was reminding myself that I only had a couple of hours before my stream started. And if I was wanting to make an extra five to ten bucks, I needed to fucking just get a early start, and not fucking screw around. I was feeling that until I got a job, I would try and get as much work done on these games as I could, in order to make at least some form of a revenue. Especially since I did give half of my money to mom and dad, as a way to help with the kids.

Scene 6: August 27 2020 2:46 pm

The next day, I was pulling up at Bebe's house. Even after two years, I still have a vague idea where I needed to go. As I was there, I was closing my eyes tightly, demanding my brain to not screw this up. As I stared outside, Bebe was already showing up with a blue dress.

"Hey Todd. I'm shocked that you decided to show up as early as you fucking did. I guess that this can give us some extra fucking time." After she said that, I sighed, and I was feeling like I just needed to fucking calm down, and not be saying much. I had a feeling that if I was letting my fear show, it would be a bit much for her to fucking take.

"Yeah, I didn't want to lose out on my fucking chance to see how you were doing." After I was telling her this, she got in the fucking car, and we started to head on away. As I was driving off, I really had no idea what my fucking plan was going to be.

We eventually drove to her favorite Mexican restaurant, which we went to once after a semester, to celebrate. The longer that I was talking with her, the more I remembered those great fucking times with her those two school years that we were able to attend together. I wouldn't be surprised if people did think we were already dating.

Once there, Bebe and I sat down. As we were talking, I was feeling like I just needed this first date to be entirely just catching up with her. I felt like she deserved something here. "So Bebe, is the pizza job something you plan on keeping up long term?" I asked, feeling like I would just try and see how she was feeling here.

"Honestly, I have no fucking idea. I mean, I would feel like it would be kind of nice to stay at someplace long period. But truth be told, I hardly fucking care enough. It's a pizza delivery restaurant." She said, and then I slowly nodded, feeling no need to argue with this.

"Yeah, I guess that makes some sense. Sorry for fucking asking. I know it's none of my business. I guess that I just felt bad for everything that has happened." I said, and I was glad to be able to just have a chance to try and fucking make things right.

"So I heard that your youngest brother was just born. How are you fucking feeling about that?" She asked, and I simply shrugged, feeling nothing out of it too much. I guess that I was just feeling like there was no real reason to worry about it too much.

"Yeah. But truth be told, with me trying to put in job applications, and trying to fucking get as much work done on those streams so I can provide my parents at least some revenue every week, it can be a bit hard. I think that I might just start splitting my streams down into several one hour chunks for youtube as well." I said, feeling like she probably would not really care to hear this at all.

"Yeah, I guess that if you monetize those, then there is a small chance you might be able to get some money that way. But what would be the point, if you can't upload your original stuff?" She asked, and I was glad she asked that. Because for once, this showed I was planning stuff out.

"I downloaded every single one I have done since graduation onto a hard drive. I can start uploading those once every day or something as a start. I probably won't bother splitting those up, since I already have a lot of shit that I need to do here." I said, and then I was sighing, thinking nothing of it.

"I get the idea of providing money for your younger family. I have been setting aside fifteen dollars every week's pay check for my younger brother, to eventually help him with college. Although I have kept silent about that, for his own sake." After she said that, I slowly nodded, thinking this was better than nothing.

"You have a brother?" I asked, completely forgetting if we ever had that discussion in the first place or not. You know way back when. She was slowly nodding, glad to see that I was still showing at least some interest in the subject right now.

"Yeah, two of them actually. A older and younger one. But they are both far apart from me in age." She said, and then shrugged. "Exactly ten years apart each. So when you graduated, my older one was already twenty six and doing his own adult things, and my younger one was just six years old getting into kindergarten." She said, and I slowly nodded, feeling like I got it decently well enough.

"I suppose that does make some fucking sense. Not mentioning them too much, I mean." I said, and then I shrugged as I said that. "So yeah, I mean, out of all the siblings, I am probably the most boring one. And that might be a good thing honestly." I said, feeling like being interesting and all over the place was probably a terrible idea.

"I do know that Gabe is much more eccentric compared to you. I remember at one point in time, everybody was making theories that he might be gay." Bebe said, and I was laughing, remembering the times even I fucking thought that at one point.

"I just feel kind of bad. After all, my dad is retiring soon, and when that happens, then that means that I might be the only source of income here. And if that happens, then I might need to pick up extra hours on my streaming site, if I can't get a job. I am still posting in applications every three to four days, to be safe. But in all honesty, I am kind of losing hope." I said, feeling like I was just needing to be honest with her.

"Yeah, I guess I can see how just streaming longer, at least for now, might be the easiest way to do stuff. I mean, at least you can keep something going this way." Bebe said, and she was shaking her head as she was saying this. She sounded fucking unsure of what to tell me though.

"I hope that you do know that if for nothing else, I do want to fucking help you out here. I just feel like you need to give me something to fucking work with." She said, and I shook my head. Feeling like she didn't need to fucking get in my issues.

"Look, I want you to just fucking focus on high school. You only have a fucking year left. Just focus on graduating." I said, and then as I said this to her, I saw her looking like she wanted to fucking argue with me. As if she was needing to change my mind.

"Look Bebe, this is not something that I am going to be arguing with you on." I said, and then I was feeling like I needed to just get her to see that I was serious here. "I mean, your brother is only eight years old. Like you said, he has a long way to fucking go. I think you need to focus on working with him for now." I said, and I was shrugging, feeling like saying this would get her to fucking stop.

"Yeah, to be honest, I am surprised you even asked me to go on a date in the first place. I was starting to think that you had already moved on, and stopped caring or people like myself." She said, and then I looked at her, and I was feeling like what she was saying was going to fucking hurt a bit.

"Well, I want to see that you're doing well. And there is nothing wrong with checking up on you every once in a while." After I was telling her this, I was feeling like saying this would get her to shut up. She looked down, kind of unsure of what to say.

"So is this all the fucking date is? Fucking checking up on me?" She asked, and I was sighing, feeling like the way that I worded that would have been a lot better. But I fucking felt like she was just trying to pull my fucking leg right now.

"That is not what I meant." I said, and I was feeling like that was enough on that subject. "Bebe, do you want to go on another date soon? You know, maybe next weekend or something? I feel like that would be great for both of us." I said, feeling like I just needed to fucking try and get her to open up with this idea.

Despite the look of shock that I was talking like this, I was seeing that deep down, she was just happy to see that I was not turning back, and I was working with her as much as I fucking could. So with that, she smiled, seeming to be ready for what we had ahead of us.

"Yeah, I can fucking do that. Sunday, the 6th?" She asked, and then I thought about it, and I was slowly nodding, feeling happy to finally get something with her for once. I was smiling, now knowing that we were closer than ever to officially dating.

"It's a date then." I said, trying to be funny a bit, as we ended up talking for a bit, and then before long, I was heading home for the night feeling like I had fucking won the lottery. This is what I needed to boost my confidence a bit. And I was hoping she would know that soon enough.

When the date was done, I went home, and I was checking my emails. The top one was something that instantly interested me. It read: Hello Todd Robinson Jr. We received your application at the video store and are currently pending it. Call back in two to three days time from when you get this email and we will let you know the current status of your placement. Thanks for your interest in working with us. As it said that, I sighed. At least it was a response. Which was more than most places.

Scene 7: August 28 2020 3:57 pm

Dan and I were back at the gas station, and I was feeling happier, knowing that there was going to be a fucking break from this bullshit. Since Dan couldn't be allowed to do this with the fucking party. Once inside, I was seeing Benjamin actually looking shocked to be seeing us both here. Probably thinking that we were never going to be coming back or something.

"I wasn't expecting either of you to come back here. I guess that maybe there might be more merit to this idea than I originally thought." He was saying, and he was sounding happier as he was saying this. I almost felt better, knowing that he wasn't going to be upset with us right now or anything.

"So, you were telling us that you had been investigating this for a while? Would you be willing to tell us what you fucking found?" Dan asked, and then Benjamin sighed, seeming to feel like since we were getting right into this, he might as well not really fucking dance around the subject at all.

"Well, truth be told, as you guys know, I have been doing this for a while now. So you know that corporate tower business that has been around for decades? Lazarus." He said, and then I was slowly nodding, the name kind of coming back to me. I mean, of course I knew of it, but I never cared for it too much. I just thought it was a random place where business was done.

"It seems like for years and years now, theories about their involvement in what is happening has been going around. It seems like back in the 1980's and early 1990's especially, these fucking controversies were so fucking bad, it nearly destroyed the entire company. Clearly, when you have something like this, there must be a reason." Benjamin said, and I slowly nodded as I heard this.

"Yeah, I remember my dad mentioning something like this once." I said, and then I was shrugging, only pretending to be interested in this. As I was listening to him, I was taking my phone out, to see if anybody fucking texted me right now.

"Why haven't you ever talked with him about this shit before?" Benjamin asked, and then I looked at him, wondering what his fucking point was right now. Either way, he was pressing my buttons, and I needed him to fucking back off, before he made me angry.

"He probably didn't find it important. I have tried to talk to him about various things, but he seemed to hardly be interested in the shit. So I choose to fucking leave it alone." I said, feeling like he needed to see that he was crossing a line when I said that.

"Maybe he is just knows that you are getting closer to knowing the truth, and if you fucking learn, then he will be screwed." After Benjamin was telling me this, I was wondering what in the world he was even trying to accomplish right now.

"Just tell me what you fucking found." I said, and I was feeling like I was able to change the subject as fast as I could, and get back on topic, then everybody would know that this was a line that just needed to fucking stop being crossed right now. I looked at Dan, hoping he saw why this was a bad idea.

"Well, I also looked in my sisters stuff when my parents are away, and I can get away with checking around, and it seems like she was keeping a journal, where she was making comments about how some teachers were making her uncomfortable." Benjamin was saying, and I instantly knew what he meant.

"Oh shit. Does that mean that the teachers might be involved?" Dan asked, and I was thinking he might have been pushing a bit too hard on this, but at the same time, I was sort of seeing like he might have been right when he was saying this. And that was the thing that I hated.

"I mean, I think it is possible. I mean, I heard a lot about how the sixth grade teacher, Mr. Saltzer, works during nights, and has been visiting places such as hotels, and other areas." As he said this, I was looking down on the ground, hoping that everything was all just a over reaction.

"Look guys, I know you fucking want to help out people like Benjamin's sister, but if this theory is true, and teachers are doing this, then you are going to possibly have to dismantle the school system." I said, and I was standing up, feeling like I just needed to put my fucking foot down as I said this.

"And that is going to be putting darts on all of you. Why the fucking hell would you even fucking try and do something like this?" I asked, feeling like I just needed to try and fucking end this discussion right now. I was seeing both guys looking shocked at the way that I was acting.

"So are you saying that you do think this is true?" Benjamin asked, and I was sighing, and I had no idea what in the world I was fucking feeling. In all honesty, I was feeling like these people were really insane to do this.

"I am saying that it isn't impossible. I never said it was impossible. I just said that I think it is extremely unlikely. But if it is true, and the rumors about teachers are proven right, then you guys need to plan something else entirely." I said, feeling the need to just get this subject to fucking end.

"And I guess that I am also saying that if this does turn out to be true, then I Just really fucking hope there are other solutions to make this whole thing work." I was saying, feeling like I just needed to at least try and keep them happier.

"My friend Carlos is having his twenty first birthday tomorrow. If you want, you can go. I'll even stick up for you. But just please, at least for tomorrow, just don't get obsessed, and for one night, at least pretend like nothing is happening." I said, hoping that Benjamin would at least consider what I was saying.

"Carlos. I don't think I ever spoke a single word with the guy. Why in the world would he pretend to want to hang out with me?" He asked, and I feel like he just completely fucking missed what I was saying earlier. And it was a bit annoying, to be honest.

"I will just fucking vouch for you. I will just say that you needed a break from this job, and that you have spoken with Dan a few times. I just need you to stop fucking focusing on the shit like missing girls for now. That is all that I need." I said, and I was seeing him looking like he was shocked to hear me acting this way at all.

"Okay, I guess that I can fucking do that." After he was telling me this, I was shaking my head. "I just know my fathers best friend all those years ago grew too fucking obsessed with this case. It ruined him, from what my father said. And I do not think you deserve that. Even though I barely care about you." I said, feeling like I just needed to be fully honest.

As Benjamin was hearing me make that confession of barely caring, I was seeing him looking like he was kind of feeling down by what I said. But I was feeling like being real with him was all that he had fucking needed here.

As we were thinking for a while, I really had no idea what I could even fucking do at all. "Todd, just make sure that if something happens to Lydia, you actually fucking step up, and stop fucking brushing shit off." He said, and then I was looking at him, shocked to even hear him say this in the first place.

I was hating the fact that Benjamin had to bring my fucking sister into this. I felt like that was taking it too fucking far. But I was feeling like I would just shut up, and not let him have the satisfaction of knowing that he pushed me a bit there.

"I will." I said, as I went to my car, and started to drive home. I was over this discussion about grinder and missing girls. I couldn't fucking take it anymore. These people were just not caring about what my fucking lines were, and I was letting them push me like this. It seriously pissed me off.

I went home later, and I was starting up my stream, and I was feeling like I just needed to lay them all the ground plan, to see what they were thinking about this. "Hey guys, sorry for the early start. But due to family issues, I am probably going to be doing a lot more streaming until I get a job to balance things out. I will also be letting you know starting Sunday, I will be uploading my old vods to a youtube channel, one a day until I catch up. And starting next week, I will extend my Monday, Wednesday, and Friday streams to be 4 to midnight now. And I will also be picking up a 8 to midnight Tuesday and Thursday stream." I said, and then with that, I went right to work, just focused on getting to work here.

Scene 8: August 29 2020 4:49 pm

I was at Carlo's twenty first birthday party, and I noticed that Benjamin and Dan were already there. Benjamin still looked like he was extremely fucking uncomfortable with being there in the first place. Which given his perspective, I guess I could sort of see what he was feeling right now.

I felt like at this point, it would be best to come clean to them, about what I had done. "So I invited Bebe over, since she had the evening off." I said, and I was seeing Carlos looking kind of scared at this one. Feeling like I might have pushed things too far with this one.

"Dude, she's still in high school. I mean, I can bullshit my way out of you three drinking underage, because you guys are only a year off. But Bebe, that won't fucking happen." After he was saying this, I was kind of feeling bad for what I done. He was clearly fucking flustered.

"Look, there's nothing we can fucking do about it now. So getting pissed off over it isn't going to fucking do any favors." I said, and sat down, as I took a cigarette out, and grabbed a bottle of Bud Light. As I was drinking already, I saw Benjamin looking rather upset over something.

"What are you upset over?" I asked, and to be honest, I was kind of just trying to hide the fact that his way of acting was kind of getting on my nerves. As I said that this, Benjamin was thinking about what to say. Thinking of how to get people to listen to him.

"I guess that I am just upset that I am a little bit jealous that I never really got the chance to live a normal school life. Where I would be able to go out to parties every fucking weekend, and just not really have friends." After Benjamin asked this, I was seeing Carlos looking like he was kind of feeling like he needed to break the ice.

"Look, I get that you were invited here. But you didn't have to fucking come if you did not want to." He said, and then Benjamin seemed to be kind of taken back by the way that Carlos had said that, but choose to remain silent.

"Todd felt like it would be best for me to just get outside, and stop fucking worrying about things I can't change." He said, and shrugged, as he was grabbing a Cooler's Light, and started to drink it a bit. I was smiling as I saw him finally opening up here.

"Yeah, I'm not going to lie, but you're in your fucking early twenties. It is too soon to be worrying about things that happened all those years ago that you can't fucking change." Carlos said, hoping he would get Benjamin to consider what he had heard.

"Have you guys heard anything about the election in November. My parents are always fucking talking about it. Constantly going on about how Biden and Trump are both terrible candidates who should have never ran for office in the first place." Dan said, and I was shocked at the fact that he was bringing this up out of nowhere.

"Oh god, not that topic of all things. If I had to hear about either Biden or Trump one more fucking time, I think my brain would explode from bullshit." Carlos said, and I was laughing at this, as if finding it funny to even imagine the idea of him having to deal with politics, since he seemed to be the last person to ever give a single shit.

"Sorry. I just thought that it was something that might have been interesting." Dan backed down, feeling that since it was his birthday, this was the one day of the year that he really needed to actually respect the mans wishes.

I laughed at this, thinking that the fact he tried to bring politics up was a really fucking dumb rookie mistake. I took a cigarette out, feeling like I would just enjoy the night while we were here. Not worry about anything else.

Before long, Bebe showed up, and she was placing her work hat down, and before I was even able to offer her anything, she already took the fucking first can, and started to drink it. "I am so fucking over people getting upset over how long it takes for pizza orders to show up."

As she said that, I was seeing Carlos looking like he was fining her upset reaction to be pure gold. "You know, if you do not want to be there anymore, you can just fucking quit." As Carlos said this, I was seeing Bebe looking at him, as if not even blaming him for thinking that.

"Not when you are trying to save up for college, and you just want to get the fucking hell out of Wayside. Quitting is the last option I fucking have then." After she was telling Carlos this, he seemed to tone down.

"Look, all that I was trying to say is that you don't have to work in that place specifically, you can just get a different job is all that I meant." After Carlos said this, he was shrugging, feeling no need to go further with this at all.

"Besides, why are you so fucking focused on college in the first place? Most people never fucking settle down for the occupation they study for in the first place." Dan said, wondering if she was going to at least consider what he had said.

"That is because in all honesty, I want to get the hell out of this shit show. I feel like I got to just put this behind me." Bebe said, referring to the missing girls. I was feeling like her bringing it up was fair, since she was the one that would have the most impact on what was going on here.

"Let's go to my fucking pool. Since my parents are going to be out for a few days, I might as well." Carlos said, trying to change the subject, and as we were going back there, I was looking at Bebe, and I was feeling bad for her, since she was feeling like she was never able to live here anymore.

Once at the back, we were all looking at each other. Carlos was smiling as he put his phone down on a table, and his wallet, and then he jumped inside, creating a decent size splash, getting Benjamin wet, and for the first time in a really fucking long ass time, I saw a faint smile on his face.

"God damn it. Now I'm going to have to jump in." Benjamin said, and did the same procedure as Carlos done. Then he went back, and ran towards the pool, trying to create as big of a splash as possible. I was feeling like the fact that these people were pretending to have some fun was enough to get me going.

I grabbed Bebe, and I was walking her to the edge of the pool, and dropped her in. As she was yelping in shock at this, she was laughing at that. I was seeing from the blush on her face though that she was finding my way of playing with her hilarious.

Dan went in next, and when four of the five of us were already in the pool, I was feeling like at this point, I might as well join. So I did my own drop everything off, and then went in myself, where I swam over to Bebe, trying to just be with her the most. After all, I did invite her to the party, so I needed to be with her the most.

A couple of hours of drinking, smoking, shit talking, and being loud as all hell later, Benjamin was laughing, and then holding both his arms up, in a victory stretch. "God, I feel like you guys might be right. It might be best to just drop the subject, and just move on with my life." Benjamin said, feeling like he was finally getting closure.

"I'm sure your sister would want you to be happy." Dan said, patting the guy on his shoulder, feeling like there was something to get out of this. I was looking at Bebe, feeling like two of us were finally moving on with our life, and no longer being dragged out by anything.

Late that night, I parked the car, slightly driving over the grass, which was a sign of how drunk I had gotten. I went inside the house, and went to Ridge's cradle. As I was looking down at the one week old youngest sibling, I was thinking about the fact that I would honestly do my best to make sure that I was there for him, even if it meant putting myself behind him as a result.

Scene 9: August 30 2020 5:51 pm

As soon as I started up my day, I went to my hard drive, and went all the way down to the first file on it. Which was from April 4, 2018. Which was a two hour long Mass Effect 1 video. Where I was starting my playthrough of the trilogy. I forgot that I only did 2 hours back then. As well as the fact that I actually started two months before graduation. But regardless, I was uploading the video to my account I just made minutes prior.

When I was done working on the details, and the time stamp if the real filming date, I reminded myself that I needed to upload one of these every single day until I caught up once again. And then after that, I'll see what my plan was.

The next day, when I was hanging around with Henry and Lydia, as they were debating with each other which movies were better, I was thinking about the call that I needed to make towards the video store. Once I was feeling like they were finally at a point where they didn't need me anymore, I went to my room, and brought my phone out.

Once the guy answered, he immediately knew what I was here for. "Oh hey Todd, so this is about the application right? Look, I got some bad news, but you might have to wait until somewhere between Tuesday and Thursday to ask again." He said, and the I was sighing in annoyance, but at least he wasn't flat out saying now.

"Why?" I asked, not even angry, just feeling like I did deserve a fucking explanation. There was a moment of silence, and I was seeing that he was considering my question for a second.

"I guess that people are bound to learn anyways. But there was a eighteen year old high school graduate. Her name was Wendee. She had been working here for several years. She has not been seen in a day or two, and her parents confirmed she is nowhere to be seen. I am just closing the shop down for a week, while I work out a new plan of schedule, and while the immediate news dies off." He said, and then I sighed in confirmation that I did get it.

"I am still looking into getting you in for a interview. I just feel like it is best to lay low for a while. So like I said, maybe around Wednesday or something, go ahead and give me another call." He said, and I slowly planned that out.

"Okay. Sure. September 2nd. Talk to you then." I said, and then closed the phone, feeling like I just needed to accept that something like this was happening right now. When I sat down, I was feeling like it was a good thing I started to make those schedules for my recordings. Thirty two hours a week, and earning 4 to 6 dollars an hour would get me between 128 and 192 dollars a week. It was something at least. Especially since that would be 64 to 96 dollars a week for my parents to help with Ridge.

Once I was in the main living room again, I was seeing Lydia and Henry looking like they wanted to see what was the issue was. I sighed, and I sat down, not really in the mood to have this discussion at all. They probably would be thinking that I was trying too hard to make something out of nothing.

"Why are you so worried about working, when you have a job on twitch?" Lydia asked, and I was sighing, feeling like I was needing to deflect that off a bit. "I mean, mom and dad are making tons of money right now. You do not need to be worried about it."

Lydia probably did not realize, and I hoped she never would, that money was something we never had enough of. That was the whole reason I was working on these streams in the first place. That way while I was finding a job, at least something was fucking coming in.

"Well, you never know when you'll need something." I said, and I smiled. Hoping that by saying it this way, I would be able to get her to temporarily drop the subject. Besides, I was feeling like whatever Lydia was thinking, it was in good intentions, and just a bit misguided.

I also needed to remember that at age seven, four to six dollars every hour of something probably seemed like a fucking god like amount of money. So with that, I rubbed her hair, feeling like I just needed to give her some fucking slack here.

I was sitting down for a while, and thinking about something else. "Besides, I do plan on moving on some day. That will help me get my own house. You know, just try and fucking make a difference that way." I said, and I was thinking about how much I was dragging the subject down to the ground by talking about this stuff. As I waited, there was a knock on the door.

I answered the door, and I was seeing Bebe, and her younger brother, or I presumed was her younger brother. "Hey this is Robbie Dan. Going into the second grade this year. I felt like I would at least introduce him to you once." She said, and then I slowly nodded, feeling like knowing him was going to be helpful for me.

I was also thinking of something else to help me out right now. "Hey Robbie, I have a younger sister. Going into the first grade. Would you be willing to watch over her while she starts school, and gets used to the situation? I would really fucking appreciate it." I asked, and I was seeing Robbie shocked that I was asking him this to begin with.

"I guess that I can." Robbie said, shocked that this was literally the first thing I talked to him about. As I was sitting down, I was thinking about the fact that Lydia was only 9 days away from having her entire life change, and I was going to be there for at least the early parts of it.

"I mean, it's just the fact that I can't be there for her when she goes to school, and I do not want her to be harassed by everybody all the time." I said, and then I looked at Bebe, who seemed to have a relatively neutral opinion on what I was saying right now. Probably thinking that I was kind of throwing her brother under the bus by asking him this.

"Yeah, thanks for inviting me to the party yesterday. I actually had a lot of fun. And it seemed even Carlos seemed to kind of warm up to me being there after a while." After she was telling me this, I was sighing, feeling like I just needed to let her be happier that I was giving her even this fucking much to begin with.

"I mean, I felt like you deserved the chance to see that my friends aren't really all that bad of people. They just kind of need some fucking time getting used to. Benjamin was the only one that was kind of unplanned honestly." I said, and I was feeling like telling her this would get her to clam down.

"Are we still on for the sixth?" She asked, and then I nodded, feeling like I would need to do anything to get her to see that I was going to fucking fight for her. Then I looked down at Robbie Dan, feeling like I just needed to try and fucking get him to feel like I was not a bad guy.

"Yeah, I have nothing going on that day. Hopefully I will be much better prepared for it this time. Considering the fact that I kind of failed at making that a really great date the last time." I said, feeling like I just needed to be honest with her as I said this. She sighed, wanting me to fucking stop this shit.

"I didn't fucking mind Todd. I mean, I knew you probably were not really expecting to have a date turn out well, so you were on edge." She said, and then I was shrugging, and I was feeling like there was no need to be talking like this with her now. I just felt happy to know we were doing well, and that was all that I had needed.

I was feeling like I was going to just need to start to get happier. "You know, I am glad that Benjamin, even in a drunken state, was finally starting to come to his senses, and realize that he needed to be happier than he would be by constantly going around, and working on this case. He realizes he deserves better." I said, feeling like this was something to make me feel like I didn't completely waste my time going to the gas station after all.

Robbie Dan looked at the two of us, wanting the full fucking story. "Can you tell me about the party Todd?" He asked, and I looked at him, feeling like it would be a good idea to just not say anything. Mainly as a way to keep him out of adult affairs.

"We just hung out, and let loose. Nothing horrible. It all turned out fine." I said, feeling like telling him this would get him to see that nothing horrible happened. As I was feeling like Robbie would finally see his new life ahead of him, he would know that there was nothing wrong with just having a good time in school, not dealing with missing girls.

Scene 10: August 31 2020 2:57 pm

As soon as I had gotten up that morning, I took my second vod, which was dated April 6, 2018, and then started to upload it on Youtube. I actually vaguely remembered now that it was coming back that I did record stuff before I graduated, but only on Wednesdays and Fridays.

I noticed that the one that I published the previous day actually did have three or four views, which made me feel like I was making the right choice with making these uploads.

I was talking with Gabe for a bit, as I was starting to get ready for my stream, and I was seeing him looking like he was actually really bothered by something. I sighed in annoyance, feeling like I just needed to let him say what he needed to say, for both of our sakes.

"Todd, I just wanted to apologize for the way that I treated you earlier. You know, relating to the situation with Lydia, and the way I told you how you should react around her. I guess that I just got slightly frustrated, and I was feeling like you needed to show her more of the truth to what was happening. Gabe said, and then he shook his head, feeling like whatever he said would just not fucking stick.

"It's okay. I know you were just simply trying to fucking help out. Can't really fucking blame you for the way you acted. I do think that you need to be a bit more careful though. Other people probably will not appreciate that level of interference in their lives." I said, feeling like I just needed to be totally honest with him.

"And besides, Lydia has not brought it up again. So I think that we are doing fine enough. You don't need to be so worried about this." I said, and I was trying to be relatively firm as I was telling him this. I needed him to just calm the fucking hell down, and not be so worried here.

"Okay, if you fucking say so." After Gabe was telling me this, I was sighing, and I was feeling like he just needed to look at the bigger picture before anything else. If he was going to take this so fucking seriously, then he was only going to make things worse for him.

As I was starting to walk out, and grab some snacks for the session of the day, I was then sighing. "Look, I mean, I know that sooner or later, Lydia is going to be old enough to where she will figure out the truth anyways. And when that happens, I will have to accept it. But truth be told, I feel like if I can hold off on that for a while longer, then she will be better off."

"I guess that you're right. Might as well let her enjoy the time that she still has, and not worry about something that hasn't really affected her yet." After Gabe said that, he was sighing, and was wondering what in the world he was even going to tell me now.

"So how is your streaming going?" He asked me, and I looked at him, trying to decide what in the world he was meaning. Since it was just such a random topic change, and to be honest, it did kind of shock me that he was bringing that up out of nowhere.

"It's been doing alright. Never thought that I would see the day where my biggest form of making money is playing video games. I mean, I am doing it as a way to fucking help mom and dad out every day. And until the video store lets me go in for a interview, I might as well continue this for a while." I said, and then Gabe was slowly nodding.

"Not shocked that you are trying to land the job there. After all, you have always been bigger on the movies. So I suppose that it truly just fucking fits." After Gabe was telling me this, I was sighing, wishing that he wouldn't be making a conversation anymore.

"Well, things are just kind of taking forever to happen there. And I know how much money mom and dad need, so I need to fucking get them something. Especially with Ridge around. I mean, he's already been alive for over a week, and I feel like I am not giving them enough. I guess that is another reason why I do not want to worry about the missing girls. In all honesty, you guys are already enough for me to worry about for the time being." I said, trying to mildly justify my situation.

As I was saying this to Gabe, I saw him looking like he wasn't very excited to hear what I said. But he was sort of seeing what I was telling him. "Okay. I guess that does make sense. I mean, I have no idea how mom and dad are keeping us afloat as much as they have been, with the fucking eleven kids. I'm honestly thinking of either skipping college, or just doing one or two classes at a time myself."

"Honestly, just do what you can handle. Don't be like me, where you try to do full time, and then after two terms of only getting like a 2.1, you just give up and realize that you are not ready for this. And honestly, I probably won't come back, since I feel like making money for myself and the family is what matters." I said and then went to the fridge to grab a couple of rock stars to be ready for the session.

"Thanks for always trying to be patient with me. I know that I was never the smartest sibling out of the bunch, especially compared to you and Josiah. But in all honesty, I just always had a harder time really focusing on the classes, and getting good grades. I suppose that I was just more focused on my social life." He said, and then I slowly nodded.

"It's okay dude. I mean, high school is meant to be about being social. Who fucking cares what your grades are right now? If you really want to do college so bad, just do community college. They're not worried about your grades as much as you fucking being there…" As I was telling him this, I was shrugging, and I was simply not really wanting to put much focus on this discussion anymore. I sat down, ready to work.

"What game are you currently playing anyways?" Gabe asked me, when I was getting the system set up, and I was sighing, feeling like this one would be relatively embarrassing for people who didn't know much about the game.

"Final Fantasy 9. I'm still really early on though. About six or seven hours." I said, and then I was seeing Gabe looking like he was confused what that game was about. Probably thinking that it was something else entirely.

"Never expected you to be playing that." Was all he said. Probably feeling like he just needed to say something. In order to make it seem like he was relatively engaged with what was going on. He sat down, and was then thinking of something else to say.

"I have been meeting up with Michael and Carly for a bit. They have been helping me go through the motions of the fact that this is our final fucking year at school. And in all honesty, I do not even really know what to say about it." Gabe said, and then I was slowly nodding. Kind of losing interest in the subject.

"Are you sure that those are the best friends for you to be around?" I asked, feeling like I might as well try and just be open about the fact that I was feeling like he needed to be more careful about the people that he was hanging out with. "I mean, they tried to bring you to that one party once, and you seemed rather unsure of what you were really wanting to do."

"Oh, the labyrinth party? I already moved on from that. Although I did find it odd that they were trying to force that as much as they did. After all, I never really going to those honestly." After he was telling me this, I was slowly nodding, agreeing with him.

"I went to one on my senior year of high school. Honestly though, it all felt really strange. You know, celebrating the fact that people are going missing. It just kind of feels in poor taste. I am glad that it has severely toned down in occurrence lately. The last one before the one we just had was in May." I said, feeling so much better about that fact in all honesty.

"I might go to the next one. Just say that I been to one, and see what it was like. But that is it honestly. Not because I fucking want to." After Gabe was telling me this, I was shrugging, simply thinking it was his choice on the matter.

"Well, don't feel forced to do it. You need to do whatever you feel comfortable with. But I am assuming you already fucking know that." I said, simply shrugging, and already getting kind of unsure why in the world I was even telling him this in the first place.

"I know that I should only do what I feel like I want to do. But the truth is that I feel like it would be kind of fucking fun to try. You know, see what is even happening there in the first place. Especially since there is the novelty of this always being a new location every time." Gabe said, and then I smiled as I was hearing this.

"I heard that for the longest time, they were always held at the tree house. One that was in the forest. But then it fucking burned down, and nobody ever found out why." I was sighing, feeling like there was no need to even talk about this right now.

"I think I vaguely remember that. But you know, people often times make rumors about shit. So I don't know if it is true or not." After Gabe was saying this, I was shrugging, not sure if I was really caring to continue this subject at all or not.

"I believe that it could be true. But truth be told, I try to not think about shit like that at all. I think that getting involved in rumors like that are only going to be making things worse." I said, and then with that, I was seeing that I was only sixteen minutes away from my starting point

"I'm going to just get a early start on my stream. Talk to you later." I said, and then with that, Gabe slowly nodded, feeling like there was no need to try and fight that. He walked off, and I sighed, and hit the start button, and started my session of the day. Within five minutes, I already got my first view, and I just needed to keep the momentum up that way.

Scene 11: September 1 2020 4:27 pm

The next day, after I uploaded my April 9 2018 video, I was hanging out with Dan and Carlos for a bit. I was seeing that Dan was looking like he was just shocked that the whole hang out went as well as it had done. "In all honesty, that was a pretty good fucking party." After Dan was telling Carlos this, he looked at both of us, proud of what he accomplished.

"Yeah, honestly surprised that Bebe didn't really stand out as much as I was fearing. I thought she was going to be really fucking noticeable here." After Carlos said that, he was looking at me, and seemed like he was just needing to try and fucking be honest.

"Truth be told, she is probably more fucking mature than we are right now. And that I just need to fucking give her a bit of a break." After he was admitting this, he sighed, thinking about what he was telling me. Probably thinking it was sucking to admit that Bebe was better along than either of us were.

"See. I knew that once you gave her a fucking chance, then everything is going to be fine." I said, and I was smiling at him, and then I was seeing Dan looking like he was thinking about something else. Didn't take a fucking genius to figure out what was interested in.

"I am shocked though. Hearing Benjamin say that he was willing to fucking try and move on, and put that whole thing behind him… It just seemed like something I would have never expected him to admit." Dan admitted, and I shrugged, not wanting to think too much about what was happening.

"Well, if that is the case, this just shows that he understands that living life is something ne needs to start fucking doing. And not be so fucking worried about things that he really has no power over." I said, and I was hardly fucking caring if I was sounding like a fucking asshole when I was telling him this.

"I don't fucking know dude. I mean, Benjamin really fucking cared about his sister. So I guess all I am saying is that I am wondering how quickly he will be able to actually move on from this, or if he will just fucking go back to what he is doing all the time." After Dan said this, I did sort of see what he was saying. But I did not want to say anything at all.

"Well, I think that he probably deep down realizes that it's been five years, and that if she has not returned, then she never fucking will." Carlos said, and then he was not really having much to say here. As I was looking down on my phone, I was seeing a text from Bebe.

"Hey Todd, are you available tonight?" The text said, and then I was sighing, knowing that if I wanted to meet her, I would have to end this hang out really fucking soon, or cancel my Tuesday recording, which there was no way in hell I could do that with the finances.

"I'm currently hanging out with the guys right now. If something opens up, I will come over." I said, and then I sent the text, and I was standing up, and I was really regretting everything that I was doing at this rate. Knowing that my friends deserved better.

I was feeling really bad because I knew that I was going to be making somebody really upset, depending om who I chose. Dan looked up at me, and I was seeing him looking like he was curious about something. "Are you needing to fucking do something?"

"No, just that Bebe gave me a text asking me if I could see her today. I told her that I was already seeing you guys." I said, and then I was shaking my head feeling like I just needed to try and just drop the subject for the time being.

Both Carlos and Dan looked like they were mildly annoyed with the fact that I was bringing her up in the first place. I wondered what their issue was here. "Don't you already have a date with her in a few days? I mean, you don't really need to see her right away." He said, and then I looked at him, wondering what his point was.

"I'll check back in like ten minutes, and see if she responds. I'll see what the situation. If it's just a hang out, then I will leave it alone. But if she needs some help with her job or her brother, I am leaving right away." I said, making my point very fucking clear right now.

"Okay. That's fair." Carlos said, and was telling Dan to just back down with his eyes. I was then feeling like the fact that these people clearly cared more about a fucking hang out then anything else was really fucking rubbing me the wrong way.

As I was getting up, I wondered what I was going to do. "So if Benjamin starts to look into the case again, then will you actually be willing to fucking help him out, or will you just fucking make excuses to not do this?" Dan asked, and I was looking at him, wondering what the hell he was saying.

"That is really not important right now. You need to stop talking about that. I didn't mind it at first. But truth be told, this is starting to fucking annoy me." I said, feeling like I just needed to be one hundred percent real with him when I was saying this. Dan just seemed unsure of what to say.

I didn't want to let either of them know that I already knew who the next missing girl was. I was feeling like if either of them fucking knew that, then they would be really fucking rubbing it in my fucking face what I was needing to do.

"Honestly, I just feel like the faster that you guys just drop the fucking subject, and move on, the better that it will fucking be for you guys." I said, feeling like I just needed to be fucking honest with him. As I was saying this, I closed my eyes, just wishing that this would be fucking over with.

"And in all honesty, I feel like the fact that Benjamin has started to show signs of letting go shows that you should be too." I said, feeling like the more real that I was with him the better that I could have been here. I was starting to smoke a cigarette, wondering what else to fucking say to them at all.

As Carlos and Dan looked at each other, I saw both of them looking kind of annoyed with the way that I was talking here. "Besides, Lydia starts school in a week. I want to make sure that she actually has a good time in first grade. That is my biggest worry right now." I said, hoping that saying this was going to get them to see that I wasn't a bad person.

"Hard to believe that she is already in first grade. It feels like it was only two years ago when your mother brought her home." Dan said, and I was seeing him looking like he was just trying really fucking hard to at least act like there was a nice change of pace.

"Yeah, imagine how I feel. I was the one that had to grow up with her. I managed to convince Bebe's brother to just watch over her, and help her out, when she starts, so that way she will be able to fucking adjust easier." I said, feeling like I had some fucking hope in that guy. Deep down, I believed that the guy would not fucking make things worse for me.

"Oh yeah, I completely forgot that she had a younger brother. I mean, I remember her older one vaguely, since he drove her to school every Monday until like eighth grade." Carlos said, I was smiling, and I was hoping that as time would pass, they were going to see more and more that she was a true friend of theirs as well.

"Yeah, it is not something she mentions all the fucking time. I actually forgot about it as well, until she mentioned it on our date." I said, feeling like I might as well be honest about it as well. I was seeing Dan looking like my confession was fucking hilarious.

"Do you think you will try and be there for him when he goes through school? I mean, if you are going to be in a relationship with Bebe, you might have to fucking be." Dan said, and then I was shrugging, not sure what to even fucking tell him.

"Yeah, I might as well try. After all, I need to be there for Lydia, and as long as he keeps his promise, then I guess that I will just be there for him as well." I said, and then I was shrugging, not sure what else to tell him. There was no need to be so worried over this.

"Do you feel like over time, your sister might accuse you of spending too much time with her, and want you to give her more fucking time?" After Dan said this, I looked at him, and I was wondering what he was even trying to accomplish by asking me this.

"Honestly, I don't know. And until she says something to me directly, and tells me off, I am going to just being there for her, because I care for her. I care for her more than I care for anything else." I said, and I was feeling like saying this would be something to get them to fucking get off my fucking case. I was seeing both Dan and Carlos shocked at me saying this.

"I mean, as the only sister in the bunch, I feel like she will be needing the most help out of them all. I mean, the guys will never feel totally lost from everybody else. Considering the fact that they are all having a bunch of brothers." I was explaining, feeling like I just needed to get them to fucking stop with that fucking look. Especially since it was kind of annoying to me to deal with this right now.

"I guess that does make some sense. Sorry I was bringing it up. I just feel like you need to be more careful is all. But I guess that makes some fucking sense." After he was telling me this, I was sighing, and I was feeling like he was just trying too hard to get in my case about this.

"Don't worry. I get it." I said, and then I was bringing out my phone, and I was checking to see if I got a response from Bebe. "It's okay. Just work venting. Really annoying is all. We can talk about it during our date on the 6th."

"Nothing that can't wait a couple of days." I said, and then I was sitting down again, feeling the need to just enjoy the hang out, and not worry too much about it. I would let her have all the time in the world when it was time for the fucking date.

When I was home that night, I was pulling up my twitch app, and I was closing my eyes. I was wondering if this stream was a great idea or not. But I was hardly fucking caring at all. I needed to do this, especially since I made a slightly larger amount yesterday by the hour. So with that, I started it up.

Scene 12: September 2 2020 1:28 pm

When I was getting up that early morning, I remember that it was the day that I was supposed to call back, and at least try, to get further in my application process. This was the first one that actually returned to me, and showed any interest in working with me. So of course I was going to be following through with this one the most.

I made the call as soon as I was done working on my April 11 2018 vod, and uploading it onto youtube. I saw that I already had a couple of subscribers, who had a decent viewing percentage rate, for what the material was, that is.

When I made the call, I was sighing, and I was hoping that he would give me more to work with this time than before. The previous one was kind of upsetting to me, but I was feeling no need to be making a giant fucking issue out of it. For now at least.

Eventually, he answered the call, and seemed relatively happy to hear that I was still working on the idea of working with him. "Wow, glad to see that you haven't given up on the idea of working here." He said, and then I laughed at this.

"Until I get a flat out no, I might as well try every few fucking days. I understand things are happening at your store, so I am willing to be a bit more patient with it." I said, feeling like I just needed to say that, as a way to help sort of soften the blow a bit.

"Okay. Sure thing. Well, regardless, so the police are going to be coming by today to ask me some questions relating to Wendee. You know, the girl who graduated and went missing. They said they know I almost certainly have nothing to do with it, but just for liability purposes, since they already checked everybody." He said, and I slowly nodded.

"Okay. So just call back Saturday or something? Since you said you were opening that Sunday anyways?" I asked, and then the guy was thinking about my offer for a second, and those were the longest few fucking seconds of my entire life.

"Yeah, that might be good. Sorry that you keep having to deal with this. But I am just trying to make sure you don't have to deal with this baggage before we move further. And in all honesty, given the troubles you've already dealt with, if I choose to not hire you, I'll give you a one time hundred dollar bill to compensate for this all." He said, and that made me feel so much better.

"Wow. Thanks. That will really fucking help. Talk to you on the fifth." I said, and I hung up, and I will admit that his plan on giving me that hundred dollars helped kind of ease my worries a bit. Gave me something that I could hang my hat on, and say would be going in my favor in case things went south here.

When I was done, I started to drive to the gas station. I was going to see Benjamin again. Even if he was saying he was done looking into the cases, I felt like he deserved a progress update on what was even going on with the missing girls in the first place.

And I was hoping that with his reaction at the party, and his relatively jovial attitude, that he sincerely meant every word of what he was saying. About being willing to just fucking drop this whole thing, and not be pushing this any further than he already had been.

Once I was there, I went out of the car, and then I walked inside, and I was hoping beyond everything else, I was going to be able to make this whole thing work. Benjamin looked over, and seemed slightly less annoyed to have me here than he did earlier.

"Hey dude. Sorry I was acting so rude earlier. I mean, I understand that things might be a bit hard to see when it comes to this fucking town and their cases." After he was telling me this, I was sighing, and felt like I was needing to try and fucking be nicer to him about it than before. Even though he shit he was accusing me of really fucking stung, I knew he probably didn't mean anything with it.

"Don't worry. In fact, I was actually wanting to talk about that this time." I sat down, and took a cigarette out, and then I was smoking it for a few seconds, and I was seeing Benjamin looking shocked to even hear me willingly try and talk about it.

"Well, anyways, so I was applying at the video store today, and the owner has been telling me of this employee of his. A girl named Wendee. Was the most recent girl to go missing. Whole reason why the fucking application process is taking twenty trillion years." I said, and then I was shrugging, not thinking much of it.

"Regardless, I guess that I was just kind of feeling like, with your interest in the subject, and how much you wanted to know this all back then, that you deserved to know what was going on. After all, you seem much better suited for the job than I would want to fucking admit." As I finished, I was looking at Benjamin, wondering what he would say.

"I think I vaguely remember her from one of my classes. But since she was a couple of years below us, I never really made the effort to try and fucking speak with her honestly." After he said that, I simply shrugged, feeling like his way of looking at it made perfect fucking sense.

"Like I said I just figured that you deserved to fucking know. After all, you seemed like you were busy with trying to know every single possible detail related to the investigation before. So why not just give you some fucking information if you wanted it." I said, and then I was simply shrugging, not thinking much of it at all.

"Well, I will admit I am shocked to see that you were willing to even fucking tell me that much. Considering the fact that you always seemed like talking about this shit was just a fucking chore for you." He said, and he sounded utterly disgusted with what he was saying.

As he said that, I was looking down on the ground, and I was feeling like his way of telling me this was just going to be making me feel a trillion times worse. But I was feeling like there was no need to be so fucking worried about it.

"Well, I mean, I just have a hard time believing in everything that I hear. I mean, isn't that what people should be fucking doing? You know, actually fucking taking what people say with some grains of salt. I guess that after having all my younger siblings, you kind of have no choice but to do something like this." I said, and shrugged as I had said that.

"I don't know. I mean, what you say is interesting. But it seems like nobody wants to fucking hear me talk about it anymore. As if what I am discussing is some fucking form of endurance test to deal with." After he was telling me this, I was laughing at the way he was saying this. Thinking he was just trying to fucking be funny.

"Wow, I guess that you weren't fucking joking when you said that you really let go. Or maybe you just weren't fucking interested in the first place, and was only doing this for your fucking sister." I said, and then I was seeing that the guy was looking fucking pissed at the way that I had just said that. As if thinking that I went way too fucking far.

"What the fucking hell dude? Did you seriously have to stoop to that level?" Benjamin asked, and he was standing up, placing both his hands on the table, and he was seeming to fucking hold his anger in on a very fucking loose string. I was smiling as I was seeing this.

"I mean, I can never fucking be sure, and I feel like I just have to see what you are aware of." I said, and then I was seeing him looking like he had wanted to say more. But then he just decided to fucking drop the subject, and not be making things worse for us.

"Todd, you know, the thing is that I always start to think you might be a nice guy, and that you always start to fucking figure things out for a while. But then you say shit like this, and then I wonder what in the world I even fucking thought by that." After he was telling me this, I was slowly hearing what he said.

"Yeah, that was a bit too fucking far." I said, and then I was feeling like the confession of that would be enough to give him some fucking patience. As I said that, I saw him looking like he was just trying to decide what he would have said here.

"Todd, I feel like you need to start seeing the bigger picture here. Even if this is something you don't really understand, that doesn't change how true things really are." After he was telling me this, I shrugged, simply really not caring what he wanted to tell me.

"Holy shit, I said that I was fucking sorry. You can just fucking relax with this now." I said, and I was feeling like I just kind of had to stand my ground with this guy. "Look, maybe it is because I just simply have not had to deal with the issue myself. Maybe that is why I am not that worried about it here." I hoped that saying this would make him feel better.

"Okay. Yeah. Anyways, I just feel like deep down inside, what you guys said about letting go, was true. I feel like I made a mistake always focusing on things like this so much. But I guess that I could just not get over the idea that what I was doing was fucking wrong." He said, and then he simply shrugged at that. I looked at him, unsure of what to say now.

"That being said, if something about her comes up, and there is a chance to do what is right, then all fucking bets are off. I am going to see what I can do to change it up." After he was telling me this, I was slowly nodding, feeling like what he was telling me was fair enough. As much as it might have annoyed me to hear that.

"I guess that makes sense. After all, you got to do whatever you can to make something work." I said, and then I was shrugging, simply feeling like there was nothing else to be saying here. And that any further discussion was only going to be just dragging the subject out longer than it fucking needed to be.

As I was admitting the fact that I stepped out of line, I was wondering what in the world I would even be fucking doing now. After all, if Dan wanted to work with this guy, I was needing to be there for Dan, and therefore at least pretend to get along with Benjamin.

I walked out of the gas station, and I was feeling like I made a really fucking big mistake, and I was feeling like this guy deserved better than the way that I fucking treated him. After all, this man was just trying to fucking help his younger sister who went missing.

I guess that it was all just the fact that deep down, I was still having a hard time really buying all the shit that was going on. I was texting Bebe, and I was feeling like I would let her know what was going on. "Hey, so in my application process with the video store, I found out that the most recent missing girl was somebody who just graduated." As I sent this, I sighed, not really feeling the need to go further into it than just that.

As I was getting in the car, I was starting to drive towards my house, feeling like I Just needed to fucking relax, and not be making much of a issue out of it at all. I was feeling like maybe I was over stepping the line, and Bebe would give of give me that wake up call.

Once I pulled up at my house, I was already getting another text back. "Oh yeah, I think I heard about that. Really is a fucking shame. It seems like things never really seem to truly change. Just be sure to noy make too much of a issue around it with Benjamin." Bebe said, and then I looked down on the ground, feeling like that was literally the opposite of what happened.

"I mean, I have no idea how close you guys were with each other, so I feel like you just deserved to have a basic idea." I texted back, and then I was heading to my room, feeling like I had gone on this subject long enough, and that I just needed to fucking let it go for the time being.

"Don't worry about it. Besides, given how people are in this town, within a month, everybody will fucking forget about this anyways. As if it was all just a simple event that never fucking happened." She said, and then I was slowly nodding, thinking of the next text that I would send with her.

"Yeah. I guess when you put it that way, I sort of see what Benjamin was saying earlier. That does seem really fucking shitty. But I feel like there is no reason to be so fucking worried about it right now." I sent that text, and then I was starting to go to my room, and I was seeing Seth looking like he was wanting to say something to me for a bit.

"Todd, do you need to fucking talk?" Seth asked, and I was laughing at this. Thinking that the idea of Seth being the one to fucking talk to me about real life emotions like this was a fucking good ass joke. But I choose to not say anything about it.

"No, I'm good. I mean, I just have been thinking about a lot of things that some classmates of mine have said, and I feel like they might be right." I said, feeling like telling him this would be enough to have him get off of me for the time being.

"It's just that since Ridge was born, you have been incredibly distant. I mean, I know it's only been like eleven days, but you have hardly spent any time with us anymore." He said, and I was sort of seeing what he was saying, to a fucking degree.

"I just have been working more on my streams, as a way to provide any fucking revenue possible for this family. After all, with a new sibling, what might have been fine for me to do has changed." I said, and I was feeling like I just needed to fucking leave it at that, feeling like he would fucking get it.

"Okay, if you say so. But if you do need somebody to fucking talk with you, then I will be willing to fucking do this." After he was telling me this, I was sighing, and I had no idea what in the world I would even fucking tell him.

"Okay. Sorry." I said, and then I was feeling like I just needed to move on. He was starting to kind of get on my nerves a bit. I knew his heart was in the right place, but I was feeling like he was kind of getting too fucking deep into this right now. I was starting up my system again, feeling the need to just fucking get to work now.

I was feeling like I would just take some time to relax, and get ready for the stream that I was going to be doing that day. Since that was one of the longer ones. I was seeing that I looked at my amount that I got deposited that previous day, and it was twenty five dollars, which averaged to about dollars an hour of work on recording. Before I could think on it further, I started the next session.

Scene 13: September 3 2020 3:45 pm

The next day, when I was sitting down, I was getting a text from Benjamin already. As I was uploading my April 16 2018 vod in the back ground, I was then reading what it was saying. "Hey, dude, look, I know that I sometimes act like a asshole when it comes to talking about my sisters case. I am not trying to make you feel worse. Want to just call it off, and pretend like this resentment never happened?" He sent, and I sighed.

"It's okay dude. I know that I can be a bit of a asshole here. I am not stupid. But the truth is that I feel like there needs to be something to consider here." I said, and then and then sent that text, feeling like there was nothing else to be saying right now.

As I was staring to head on out, mainly to just refill my supplies of drinks and snacks for the streaming, which I usually picked up once a week or so, I was getting in the car, and already saw that I had gotten another text from Benjamin. I was getting annoyed with this, wondering if this was how he communicated with people.

"I know it was Dan's idea to fucking talk to me, and that you probably wanted nothing to do with it. I know that you probably found this whole thing to be rather annoying. But the truth is that I feel like when I see how concerned you guys are here, then it just makes me feel better." Benjamin said, and I was sighing, feeling like I just needed to be honest with him here.

"Truth be told, if it weren't for Dan, I wouldn't have been doing this at all in the first place. I just feel like this whole thing is a bit rough to fucking handle. But I know that Dan was concerned for your sake, for whatever fucking reason. Especially since we never hung out before." I said, and then sent the text, as I started to head to Elmore Supplies, where I would just get my supplies.

The entire time that I was driving there, I was kind of feeling like a bit of a asshole this entire time, and I felt like maybe I just needed to fucking look at myself in the mirror when talking to him about what I was doing.

After all, at least he was working, and wasn't fucking screwing around at all. So I guess that I just needed to give him some fucking credit here. I went to my phone, pulled up my bank account, to see how much money I had in my account. I was seeing via my donations that I had gotten nearly sixty dollars during those eight and a half hours earlier.

I smiled, knowing that I had enough money to get my sale of energy drinks, and some chips. As I was going right to my section of the store I usually went to the most, I grabbed my supplies right away. Aware of the fact that I was starting to gain a couple of pounds, and probably needed to start going down to the track more often.

When I was at the counter, the employee there was looking at me, and he seemed to be relatively bored with what he was doing. Not that I could fucking blame him for what he was doing. This job did not fucking seem exciting at all. Only slightly less torturous than the fucking gas station.

As I went to my car, I opened up my phone, to see if Benjamin gave me another text, which he fucking did. I sighed, and I was feeling like I just needed to try and draw the line somewhere, to not make this too fucking bad.

"Hey, maybe one of these days, when you don't have as many hours, we can fucking go on and have a talk at the gas station. Who knows, maybe we can figure some things out." Benjamin said, and I was rolling my eyes, having my cigarette out, and I was kind of getting annoyed with what he was doing. This was getting a bit much, to be honest.

"I'll see what to do. But if you would rather be working with Dan, and getting this whole fucking investigation figure out, then I suppose that I would not be able to fucking blame you at all." I sent the text, feeling like there was no need to continue the subject any longer.

As I was driving to my house, I was wondering why Benjamin even fucking cared so much what I was thinking anymore. Especially when he was kind of a asshole about everything that had happened earlier. I just figured that he was probably just desperate to have some fucking closure on our fucking fights.

Besides, I was feeling like if Carlos knew that I was still having this discussion in the first place, he would probably be feeling like I was trying too hard to be appealing to somebody who probably just needed to let things go for the time being. Which I would not even fucking disagree with.

Once I was at the house, I was seeing Henry and the twins playing around, and I was smiling as I was seeing this, feeling like the fact that they were still hanging out with each other, and having the best time in the world, was just making me feel so much better.

This time I was seeing that the text was from Bebe. I was smiling as I saw this one, feeling like I would be much more capable of giving her proper feedback than if I was talking to fucking Benjamin.

"Hey Todd, I just wanted to thank you for letting Robbie Dan be able to hang out with Lydia, I know that you probably do not really care about my younger brother too much. But he needs some friends." She said, and then I smiled as she sent that text.

"Truth be told, I am worried that Lydia is not going to properly adjust to the school this year. And I am just wanting to make sure she has any chance at all. And besides, your brother seems like a nice enough dude." I sent the text, feeling the need to make her feel better here.

"Well, either way, I think that she will see that Robbie is not a bad guy, and that he just need to have somebody there with him. So I think you're doing great." She said, and then I was feeling like her fucking way of making me feel better would just change it all.

"I will still be seeing you on the sixth. I have nothing going on. And we can just update each other on our progress here." I said, sending my text, and then I was stepping out of my car, feeling like there was nothing else to be worried about. And as I was looking around, I was seeing all three of the much younger brothers looking excited to see me.

"Having another stream today?" Henry asked, shocked to be seeing that I was going through with my idea of fucking streaming on Thursdays as well. I was feeling like I would not beat the dead horse when it comes to the money issue. So I was feeling like I would at least brush it off in a innocent way.

"Yeah. I'm going to start doing every weekday. Although much shorter ones on Tuesdays and Thursdays." I said, and then I was shrugging, thinking that this news would be enough to fucking suffice for them here.

"Can I join?" Dylan asked, smile across his face. As he asked this, I was feeling like this was something maybe my parents would not be fine with. I mean, they were okay with me acknowledging their existence. But they were still extremely young.

I think probably any of the ones after Seth were already kind of pushing it for them. Maybe Jack. But definitely not Lydia and down, at least until like say double digits. "When you guys are a little bit older, I will be totally down with that." I said, feeling like I would just try and fucking say something to get them to feel better.

"Lame." Drake said, and I was smiling, feeling like the way that I was having to kind of put my foot down did sort of suck. But I was feeling like there was really no other fucking choice, and I was hoping soon enough, they would fucking understand.

As I was heading to the fridge, I decided to put some of the energy drinks to get them at least a couple hours of cool down time before I would start my 8 in the evening stream. I ended up seeing that I got another text from Benjamin. At least this one was several minutes apart, so I was slightly less annoyed here.

"Hey, so I know that I was saying that I would start to let go. I really am trying. But I was curious, and decided to look into the Wendee girl. And I found out that she was supposed to be going to NYU." After Benjamin said this, I sighed, and I was feeling like I needed to gently end this.

"What are you going to be doing with this information?" I asked, trying to hide my annoyance at this one, as I was heading to my fucking room. As I was looking around, I was seeing Seth and Lydia watching Calvin for a bit.

I fucking hated to say it, but there was something in my mind. I was wondering what it would be like if Calvin was starting to think that I would not love him as much, due to the fact that there was Ridge, and therefore, another younger sibling that I would be able to hang out with.

But I was still only checking up on the much younger ones occasionally. I guess that, as harsh as it might sound, when they're still young enough to the point where they haven't even learned to talk yet, I might not be as interested. Because they're first bits of life were just that, simply fucking existing.

As I had been thinking about it, I was getting a text from Dan. I opened it up, wondering what he was going to want to tell me right now. "Hey Todd, when we hang out next, would you be willing to fucking help me out for a while? There is something that I want to check up on real fucking quick."

The moment that I read this, I was instantly fucking dreading what he was meaning. Just knowing that there was some fucking ulterior fucking motive to what he was planning right now. "Be honest with me dude, is this about the fucking towns cases, and you just want to check something out?" I asked, really trying to fucking not be upset.

If this was the angle he was playing at, and was just trying to simply be nicer about what he was doing, I was not going to be in the mood to play with him. Before long, he was sending the next text, and I was glad that there was transparency at the minimum.

"Yeah. At least a little bit. I know you do not fucking like it this way. But I feel like I really fucking have no choice but to at least check some things out. After all, that grinding went off like two weeks ago. And I just haven't been able to let it go." Dan said, and at this rate, I was pissed at him right now.

"Okay dude, I am not trying to fucking be rude right now, especially since I know you really do mean well. But the truth is that I think this is going too fucking far. I mean, I understand Benjamin getting obsessed here. But you make no sense like this." I said, feeling I needed to be fully honest here.

"Well, maybe it is because I am tired of having nightmares all the fucking time, and I want to be able to start sleeping well again." After he said that to me, I was sighing, and I felt like I just needed to try and fucking hear him out here.

I was thinking about how I would word my next text. "Nightmares. Look, I fucking get it. You are probably scared. It makes perfect fucking sense. But this is fucking insane. You know that if there is any chance that this case is real, people are going to know you are the one behind looking into this." I said, feeling like I just needed to get him to see reality.

"Todd, I thought that we were supposed to fucking work together, no matter what happened. This is something that I know that I really fucking need, and you brushing me off like this is really hurting." His text said, and then I sighed.

"Saturday, the fifth. We can talk about this in person then. I might not like it, but I will fucking work with you here." I said, making my text rather short but firm. I was thinking those two days would give me some time to think about what I was going to be doing, and how to work this out.

"Okay, I guess that will have to fucking do." After he was saying this to me, I sighed, and I was feeling like his way of talking to me was going to have to fucking suffice. Hopefully he would just be willing to fucking give me some explanations on what to be doing now.

"Alright, see you then. I got to get my stream ready now though. So we will have to wait." I sent the text, feeling like this would be enough to shut him up. As I was getting ready to fucking start my recording, I was feeling like maybe I went too far with how I was talking. But I never cared anymore.

When I was done with this, I was feeling like I just needed to get to work right away. Since I was already in the house, and I was now getting to the point where most people understood my fucking plans, I was feeling no need to fucking be hiding the fact that until I got a real job, this was my work. So with that, I started my September 3 2020 stream. Getting what must be near the end of Final Fantasy 9, with how much work I had put on it lately.

Scene 14: September 4 2020 12:57 am

When I was done recording that night, I was feeling like I was becoming fucking mesh. I was looking at my account, and I was seeing how much money I had already made by just doing that stream that day. Nearly thirty five dollars. When I saw this, I was smiling at this for a bit, feeling so much better about the work that I had been doing, and I felt like it was all coming together.

I was seeing Gabe looking at me, and I was wondering what he was going to try and say at this rate. To be honest, I was kind of just not really in the mood to hear it. He was probably just extremely fucking jealous of me right now.

"Dude, you are going to have like the fucking library of Alexandria soon enough with all those recordings you have done." After he was saying this, I was smiling, and I was glad to be seeing that he was acknowledging the world I had done.

"I know. And when I am much older, people will see what I have been doing ever since high school. It is all going to fucking be worth it." I said, and then I was shrugging, feeling like I just needed to not let the comments get to me right now.

"I wonder how Ridge and the others will be reacting to this when they see it all. You know, considering the fact that you have essentially been doing this his entire life." He said, and I was shrugging, thinking that it was no surprise when he was literally like two fucking weeks old. But I choose to not say much right now.

"Well, I guess that I will let him be the judge on if I was a good person or not. After all, he will have hundreds of hours to listen to, at his own accord. Nothing that I can fucking do to change that." I said, and then I was shrugging, not wanting to say much more to continue this discussion right now.

"Before I go to sleep tonight, I just wanted to thank you for all you had done. You never had to be there for us, or do all this work to pay for us. But you are doing it anyways, and I feel like that is something that I just need to fucking be happy for." After Gabe was telling me this, I was smiling at him, knowing that I made him feel so much better.

"That is what I need to do with you guys. Make you all feel better." I said, feeling no need to say much more after that. I was then getting out of my room, feeling like I just needed to be alone for a bit, and think my own fucking thoughts.

Once I was out of the house, I was feeling like if Gabe was going to be worried over me for just suddenly leaving like this, then I was going to feel immensely guilty. But in all honesty, I was just kind of tired of what everybody else around me was doing.

And in all honesty, I just needed to think hard about the fucking job that I had ahead of me. I was feeling like I needed to land that video store job, and the gaming sessions, while fun as hell, were just sort of pushing the time frame of absolutely fucking necessity by a bit longer.

Besides, I was having a feeling that whatever I would try and tell people, they would probably be finding the fact that I was constantly doing video game streams to be a bit weak, and feel like I should have been working harder on more various things.

But the other thing that was on my head was what my younger siblings, especially post like say Seth, would be wondering if they were seeing me working so fucking much to begin with. They would probably be thinking a bunch of nasty things about me. Thinking that I wasn't caring enough for them in the first place.

To be honest though, I was feeling like when I was at the beach, just thinking about what was going on, and not be letting people say shit to me about things I couldn't fucking change, like the missing girls, then I feel like this might be making things better for me.

I went to the beach, where I left the car, and then sat down on the sand, and I was taking a cigarette out. I was tired, and I was feeling like people were going to just take advantage of me because of the fact that I was still just out of high school.

As I was smoking my cigarette, I was thinking of how much I was going to be loving my time with Bebe going forward. She was giving me fucking purpose, and she was making me feel like there was always a chance to turn things around, and make things better for those around me.

And in all honesty, I was just hoping that maybe when I would work with Robbie Dan, and see what he had fucking needed in his own life, then he would just see that I was not trying to take advantage of him.

He was way too young for this shit, and I was feeling like he just needing to see that people were not going to be that way around him all the time. So I felt like maybe I would be a decent example of that going forward.

To be honest, I was feeling like when I would see Dan again, I would just have to be fully honest with him that I thought that him getting so fucking deep into this case was going to be a bad fucking idea. I just needed to get him to fucking open up, and see that this was all going to be a big fucking mistake.

And when I would try and convince him to let this investigation go, I knew he would probably be accusing me of just not caring enough for my family, and thinking that what I said was bullshit. And when that road was there, I would just hope that I would be able to keep my anger in.

I was tired, and I felt like Bebe should have just tried to find somebody better than me to be a romantic partner. I was taking a cigarette out, and I wondered why she had even liked me in the first place. I mean, there was nothing that interesting about me in the first place.

Before too long, I started to think back to the days when I just graduated high school, and I would come here every weekend, and just completely fucking zone out for several hours. Not think about the bullshit that was going on around me.

And I would be here, wondering why my parents kept having children, when they were having a hard time keeping on top of the ones that they already had. It felt so fucking unfair. And I was feeling like I was just becoming the victim of their bullshit.

When I finally calmed down a bit, I was ready to go back home, so that was what I was doing. As I was starting to drive home, I was getting a text from Bebe. I was shocked that she was texting me so fucking late at night. And kind of annoyed, to be fucking honest.

"Do you know why the police are still at the video store? I had a late shift tonight, and saw that on my way home." She asked, and I sighed, feeling like this was just a sign that I would not get to fucking go further in my process.

"They came to talk to the boss about Wendee. But that is as far as I fucking know. I thought that by now, they would have left him alone. Probably nothing important." I said, and then I smiled at this, not sure what in the world I was even going to fucking say to her.

"Yeah, but wasn't that several days ago? I would have thought that by now, they would have fucking let it go, or got the information that they fucking needed." After Bebe sent that response text, I was sighing, and I really had no idea what to tell her at all.

"Honestly, I don't know. That is just my assumption. I don't know everything. Worried that this might have to make me wait another few fucking days for a application progression." I sent, annoyed as hell, and I was feeling utterly upset at this whole thing.

"Sorry to bother you so late at night. I know you just did several hours of recording. I just felt like I needed to ask." She said, and then she left me alone. I was shaking my head, feeling no real need to continue this discussion for any longer. I went home, not in the mood to deal with this bullshit anymore.

Scene 15: September 5 2020 3:05 pm

I was making my call for the video shop, feeling the need to fucking see how the guy was doing. I was hoping he was still willing to talk with me, despite the fact that he was talking to those police officers. When I was calling for a moment, I was getting a bit worried he wouldn't answer, but when he did, I was feeling so much fucking better.

"Hey Todd, how are you today?" He asked me, and I was slowly nodding, feeling the need to just fucking get right to the main point of the discussion. "So I am guessing that you are talking about the application you had placed in?" He asked, sounding mildly annoyed with the fact we were having this discussion.

"Yeah, I just wanted to see how that was going right now." I said, and I was closing my eyes, hoping he was willing to fucking work with me here. I mean, if he didn't, I could just try again in a few days. But for now, it was starting to kind of get annoying, to be honest.

"Well, I think I will be able to get you into your actual interview next Saturday. I am really short staffed, so I think there is a good like ninety five percent chance I will hire you. But you know, procedure." He said, and I was sighing, thinking that I needed to fucking take what I could get.

"Thanks dude. I really need this right now." I said, and then after I said that, I hung up at him, and I was smiling. Out of interest, I pulled up the search results, seeing how the presidential polls were going. It was showing that as of today, Biden was expected to win by a large margin.

It showed Biden with either winning or likely to win 975 electoral votes, and Trump at just 269. I knew with how unpopular the president was, he was going to have a tough hill to climb. But the truth is that I was expecting the poll to close in by a lot before things really got to election night.

I git a text from Dan, and I was sighing, not wanting to have this discussion right now. But now I felt like I had no fucking choice. "Hey Todd, are we still going to be meeting up?" He asked, and then I sighed. Wishing that I forgot about that.

"Yeah, just give me a bit." I responded, and started to head out. I really hoped that I was not going to fucking regret this. Knowing that he was getting borderline obsessive over this, and I needed to fucking put my foot down.

Once I was at Dan's house, he was already waiting for me. I sighed, feeling like the fact that he was like this was rather fucking annoying. Dan already went to my fucking car, and once in the passenger seat, he looked rather upset at the look on my face. Thinking I was being a uncaring idiot.

"You look like you really do not want to be here right now." He said, and then I was slowly nodding, feeling like the way he was talking to me was just a way to hide the anger that he was feeling right now. I was not really in the mood to hear his opinion on the matter.

"I don't. I'm going to be honest. I think you are looking too deep for fucking results, and I think you are making things worse for both of us. But I am not going to waste my fucking time with this shit. You clearly don't fucking care at all." I said, and I shook my head, no longer caring to hide how upset I was getting with him.

"Why does me caring about the fucking town, and their shit going on, bother you so fucking much? I mean, you know that something is happening here, and you are just not taking it seriously enough. I mean, Benjamin is starting to clearly fucking let it go, and it's all your fucking fault." He said, and I was just shaking my head, not wanting this debate at all.

"Let's just fucking go…" I said, holding mt steering wheel tightly, and I was starting to drive off. "Where would you want me to fucking go?" I was feeling like the less that I was outwardly showing how much I was losing my patience with him, the better that things would be for me.

"Where would you even want to fucking go anyways?" I asked, feeling like I just needed to get him to fucking stop being a bitter bitch, and to just fucking tell me what was going on. He looked at me, kind of calming down for a bit, and not wanting to be too overly upset with me.

"I don't know, maybe we can just check out the woods." He said, and then I was laughing at this. Hearing him even still call those woods in the first place was fucking hilarious, and I think he would never really see the truth to how fucking wrong it was to still call that place a fucking forest.

"If you think that is a forest, then my god, listen to my fucking dad. It seems like just ever since he was our age, this place turned into fucking nothing. It seems like it is only a tenth of the size that it used to be, and my father has been very open about the fact that he wad disgusted with how things have gone there." After I said this, Dan just seemed like he couldn't care less.

"When are you going to realize that he might have been glamorizing things a bit?" He asked, mainly just trying to sound funny as he was saying this. But I was not really in the fucking mood to have this discussion right now. He was just clearly trying to piss me off here, and see how I would react here.

"Well, I don't fucking know. I don't care. I mean, if even half the shit he says about how Wayside used to look is true, before it turned into one tiny step below fucking Blade Runner style city, then I would see where he might be coming from for once." I was saying, feeling like I would just say that as a way to fucking get him to shut up, and not be getting any further into this.

"Okay, if you fucking say so." Dan said, and I was hearing him sounding like he was only just kind of playing along, and that I just needed to stop acting like this for whatever fucking reason. I had no idea what his issue was, but I choose to remain silent for the time being.

"But I guess that if you want to go in there, and fucking see things, then I won't stop you. I mean, there is just nothing to fucking see." I said, not really in the mood to talk about this anymore. I felt like Dan was just going to never see how fucked up this whole thing really was. And in all honesty, I was not really in the mood to argue with him anymore.

"Nothing that you are thinking of. Just fucking give it a chance, and I am sure that something will come up." Dan said, and got out of the car, and I was shaking my head. I could not believe that I was having this discussion in the first place. I got out of the car, not really wanting to discuss this right now.

As we were walking around the forest, I was feeling like whatever Dan wanted to fucking tell me, he just needed to fucking get it over with. To be honest, the man was kind of pissing me off most of the time, and I felt like I was just hanging out with a person who never really cared for what I was feeling.

"Todd, do you even fucking care what will be happening to your fucking sister? I mean, after everything that she has to deal with, you always seem to brush off the idea of looking deeper into this. I just can't help but feel like you don't care." He said, and then I looked at him, wondering why he would even risk saying something like this at all.

"Why the fuck did you just say that? Just because I don't want to waste my life on this shit doesn't mean I don't want to fucking do this." I said, and I looked at him, wondering what was fucking wrong with him as he was saying this.

"Well, I just feel like you are always trying to find excuses to not get involved in this, and I feel like those are starting to show some fucking colors of not really wanting to do what is right anymore." He said, and I looked at him, and I wondered what his fucking point was. I shook my head, just trying to hide how pissed I really was.

"Dan, I understand that you have no filter really, but that shit was way too fucking far. And I think you need to think about what you are saying first." After I was telling him this, and trying to put my foot down, I was shaking my head, feeling like he needed to just shut up.

"Well, maybe I just wanted to fucking see how you would react. I mean, I know that you think that what you're doing is noble? But you are really fucking making things worse for everybody outside your family. I feel like sooner or later, Bebe will want you to take this more seriously." He said, and I was shaking my head, feeling like he just needed to fucking stop what he was doing right now.

I was then just pushing beyond him, and I was feeling like I just needed to stop giving my friend ammunition to be feeling this way about me, and I was feeling like at the rate he was going, he was proving to really be a fucking asshole here.

Eventually, as we were looking along, I was then feeling like I just needed to try and say something to him, to get him to fucking listen to me. "Maybe you need to see that with the fact that even fucking Benjamin is willing to fucking let it go, that this is a sign that it really is no big deal." I said, feeling like saying this might give me some leverage.

As we were going along, Dan was then thinking of something else. "Look, all that I am fucking saying is that if you are going to be working at that video store, where that Wendee girl went missing, and you have a younger sister who will one day become a potential victim, then you need to take this more seriously."

"Well, when Lydia hits middle school and high school then, maybe I will get more serious about it then. Or hopefully by then, there will be a fucking answer." I said, feeling like fighting back with him was the best way to make my point. As I said that, there was a fucking tree that we walked by, with a large engraving on it.

The number '1' was on there. I looked at Dan, finally getting what it was. I sighed, and I was feeling just some sadness as I was seeing this, aware of what we were dealing with right now. "This was where the tree house used to be." I said, and then I was shaking my head, unable to handle the truth.

When I was back inside, I went to my parents room, I took my phone out, and decided to take a picture of Ridge again, and just making sure he was doing well, now that it had been two weeks since his birth. I always did this when a new sibling was born. Do weekly progress checks. For the first year or two. After I was aware he was fine, for now, I went to bed, not thinking much of it.

Scene 16: September 6 2020 4:29 pm

I was meeting up with Bebe for our date, and we were at a different pizza shop. As we were driving along, we were going past a pizza and burger shop that had finally been closed down. I saw from the way that Bebe looked at me, that she was kind of upset with the news.

"Kind of a shame that they shut Mezmer's down permanently. That used to be a popular spot for everybody to go to after school for fucking years. I remember you talking about your father going there often with his friends." Bebe said and I looked at her, shocked as hell that she even fucking remembered that in the first place.

"Yeah, I know. But the place was starting to get really run down, from what my father said. He said that this was always the hardest place to finally shut down, due to his past there." After I said that to her, I saw her looking kind of shocked to hear me still talking about that with her.

"I get it. That doesn't change how much it fucking sucks." Bebe said, and I shrugged, not thinking much on what she was saying, as in all honesty, there was nothing that I could fucking do to change it. As we were driving closer, we sat down, and I was thinking about how much she was already changing my fucking way of looking at things right now.

Once we sat down, I was feeling like I just needed to try and fucking find something to say to her, to make the situation any fucking different at all. "So Bebe, how is Robbie handling the whole going back to school in two days thing? I swear just from the atmosphere around the house, every sibling from Gabe to Lydia is just dreading the next several days." I said, trying to at least be somewhat funny about this. She was shaking her head, not sure what to fucking tell me at all.

"Well, Robbie clearly doesn't want to go back. But he seems slightly happier about having a friend like Lydia to help him. I just hope they do not hate each other by the end of the school year, and they actually can work together here." Bebe said, and I slowly nodded, feeling like I can sort of see her perspective as she was saying this.

"Well, I just hope that they actually do fucking get along. You know, I feel like asking him that outright might have been a mistake. But I care for Lydia's personal health too much." I said, and then I shrugged, not sure what to even fucking tell her at all.

"He seems to not fucking mind honestly. I just never expected you to really go that deep in your way of trying to fucking get your siblings to have a good life at the school." She said, and I was shrugging, feeling like there was no fucking choice on the matter.

"I understand that I have a hard time really committing to shit like this. But the truth is that when I see my siblings having a hard time, as the oldest one, I need to take what is happening with them more seriously." I said, and I took a cigarette out, and I wondered what to say.

"Did you ever date anybody after I graduated?" I asked, trying to not show a level of jealously, although I was having a feeling that it was kind of obvious what I was feeling, deep fucking down inside. As I was saying this, I saw her looking happy at how fucking flustered I was.

"Nobody else seemed to fucking like me in that sense. I mean, I had a couple of brief one or two month flings. But nothing too fucking long. I just never really felt like anybody I was seeing was right for me." She said, and I smiled as she had said that, knowing that I was getting her to admit I was right for her.

"Still more experience than I fucking do. Never got to get somebody to give me a shit. Kind of sucks, but I suppose that maybe something like this does make some fucking sense." After I was telling her this, I shrugged, kind of upset with what I was saying. "To be honest, I feel like Robbie could really get into something. He seems to have a bit of a charm he doesn't see yet." After I said that to her, I saw Bebe looking happy to hear me say that.

"Todd, do you feel like your siblings like you very much? I mean, I am not trying to fucking pry. But I just feel like I needed to fucking ask." After she was telling me this, I looked at her, and I was wondering what her fucking point was. I felt like she was really over stretching.

"I mean, I don't fucking know. In all honesty, I think that if they didn't, then that is something that I just need to fucking accept. After all, people are all allowed to have personal preferences, and not be fucking attacked over this." I said, feeling like I just needed to say this, as a way to get her to leave the subject.

"I mean, I just know that it seems like the younger ones are a bit upset at the fact that you are trying to get a job so hard, and the fact that you are doing all those streaming sessions." Bebe said, and I was shrugging, thinking that this was a temporary thing.

"Well, once they get older, and understand that school is also work in its own way, then they will fucking leave me alone about it. I remember when I was younger, and I felt like my dad was working too much." I said, and I shrugged, feeling like I just needed to get her to fucking leave me alone with this.

"Yeah, I guess that is fair. It's just that Robbie Dan understands what I need to do, and he doesn't seem too fucking bitter about it. The only thing that lets him down is that I don't talk to him as much." Bebe said, and then she was shrugging as she said that.

"I mean, I don't know why I care so much what that guy thinks. After all, until this last summer or so, he was a massive fucking pill, and always had a hard time talking with me. I think all the bullshit about protests made him start to open up." She said, and I looked at her, shocked that this was what made him open up.

"Why fucking that, of all things?" I asked, and then I was shrugging, simply feeling like there was no better response for me to make here. She shrugged, not sure what in the world to even fucking say at this rate.

"I don't know. I think he is just now getting to the age where he understands how serious death can be, and he is starting to fucking take things a bit more serious. Just my fucking guess. To be honest, I just kind of wished he didn't feel that fucking way. It is a god damn shame honestly." She said, and I shrugged, not sure what to tell her.

"Yeah, I guess that makes some sense. I mean, I never was thinking of it that way, I will admit." I said, feeling like I would just be honest with her. But I knew that if she was going to be there for Robbie, I just kind of needed to let this fucking happen, and not be a smart ass this whole fucking time.

When our order was placed down, I was thinking of how to continue this conversation for a bit longer. "Honestly Bebe, I just think that you probably have your priorities with your siblings more figured out than I fucking do." I said, feeling like I was just needing to fully come clean to her as I said this.

Scene 17: September 7 2020 3:05 pm

On the last day of summer break, I was feeling like I would treat the family to a pizza, to let them have one last nice meal before shit really hit the fucking fan for them one more time. And since this was Gabe's last year, and Lydia's first year, and Seth's first in middle school, there were three major ones. So a pizza felt in place.

"So Todd, how is the date with the girl going?" Jack asked me, and I was clearly seeing that he was trying to get me to scold him, or to get all embarrassed. I looked at him, and I was sighing, since I was not wanting to discuss this right now.

"Honestly, she has been doing well. We just have been talking about her senior year of high school coming up." I said, and then Jack had a shocked look on his face. As if unable to believe I would dare date somebody "so much younger" than me.

Which to be fair, when you're fucking nine years old, two does seem like a fucking overwhelming amount of time. As I was sighing, I had no idea what else to say. "Just make sure that if you see Lydia having some trouble, that you fucking help her out, and not be a ass about it." I said, not really in the mood to be having this discussion.

Jack was looking like he was really taken back by the way that I was targeting him about this. But the truth was that I just needed to fucking be blunt about it, and I felt like if he was wanting to fight me over this, then I felt like I just needed to get him to stop.

"Can you start your stream later today?" Lydia asked, and I was shocked at her targeting me like this. I was feeling like her way of asking me this way was kind of unfair. But I was looking down on the ground, and I was feeling like I could indeed see her perspective.

"I might be willing to put it off until 6, but that's fucking it. After that, I need to get to work." I said, and I wasn't even fucking caring if they didn't like it at all. As I said that, Lydia looked slightly sad, since I wasn't giving her a huge amount of fucking time at all.

"So Todd, how much progress have you been making on your backlog?" Josiah asked me, and I gave him an annoyed look, knowing that he was clearly just trying to get me to go on a long ass discussion about that. Especially when I really wasn't in the fucking mood for something like this.

"Well, more progress than I was fearing, but less progress than I was fucking hoping for." I said, and then I was sighing, feeling like I would just be fucking honest about my feelings. As I said that, I was seeing Josiah looking shocked that I wasn't even trying to lie to him about it.

"I guess that maybe that's why you like recording so much. So you can do more sessions like this." He said, and I was sighing, since I was feeling like he was just trying to fucking get me to feel bad for what I had been doing.

"Hey, I don't get in your business when it comes to the fucking music. So give me a break. At least I'm getting money off of it." I said, and then I was seeing that this was enough to get Josiah to leave me alone about it. At least for the time being. Which was what I was exactly shooting for.

I felt like I just needed to try and find something to make the situation slightly less bad for Josiah, since I knew that he wasn't trying to be an asshole about it, and I was only making things worse for him. "Well, do you know if there are any school talent shows going on at all? You should give those a chance."

As I said that, Josiah smiled, and I was seeing Seth getting excited about that. "Oh yeah, I want to do that. Show people how much better my comedy improved the last three months. The kids love it." Seth said, and then I was feeling like when he gets older, he needs to work on that wording. But at eleven, it wasn't too weird.

"Nobody finds your comedy funny." Jack said, and I was feeling like he was being incredibly harsh with the wording, but the general sentiment might have honestly been true, and I was just needing to find a way to make him feel better about it.

"Oh come on. He's improving. Give him a fucking chance." I said, and I was feeling like the fact that Jack was being so mean spirited about this was a sign that he didn't understand the fact that people were working towards their own goals, at their own pace.

"You should invite Bebe over next time." Gabe said, and I was looking at him, and I was shocked at the fact that he was saying this. I was feeling like if I did, then she was going to be so fucking out of place, that it was going to be extremely fucking hard to explain it to my parents.

"I can offer. But she will still probably not want to fucking come." I said, and I was feeling like I just needed to not let this subject go any further. In all honesty, I wasn't really wanting to have this discussion at all with them.

Before long, the pizza showed up, and I thanked the driver, who sadly wasn't Bebe this time, as they headed off, and I placed all the boxes down, as I was growing a smile. I just couldn't believe that we were in that time of the year again. Starting school once again.

Once we were all sitting down, and the younger four joined in, with Henry carrying Calvin and Ridge on both hands, which I was feeling like was a bad idea, but I choose to not say anything at all. As they were sitting down, and joining the moment, I was looking at the two youngest siblings, knowing that they were not aware of what pizza was like yet. Jack already grabbed two slices, and was ready to fucking go.

"And this is your last year where you don't have to worry about grades or any other assignments." I said to Henry, and he was looking like he was fucking upset with me bringing that up to him. But I was seeing from the look on his face that he hadn't wanted me to bring it up.

"School sounds boring." As Henry said that, I was laughing at this, feeling like he was hitting the nail on the fucking head when he was saying this. The other siblings, barring Lydia who wouldn't start until tomorrow, all looked at him, as if thinking that he had no idea how bad it could fucking get.

"Well, I am going to be grabbing that diploma, and I am going to run off, and I am going to never come back. And I will just live my life as if I had never been there to begin with." Gabe said, trying to sound badass about it. It didn't work, but I appreciated the fact that he was willing to try something new.

"We'll go together." Dylan said, referring to Drake. And I was thinking that would indeed make things better for both of them. Considering the fact that no matter how bad things got, a family member would be there with them from start to finish, and relief the issue a bit.

Scene 18: September 8 2020 6:10 pm

The first day of the school year was already over, and Bebe was texting me how it had gone for Robbie Dan, and in all honesty, when I was seeing the messages flowing along, I was already feeling so much fucking better about what she had been accomplishing.

"He was doing so well. He was telling me about how nobody was making fun of him for being friends with Lydia already. I am so happy that they were not giving him shit over that." After she had said that to me, I was sighing, and I was wondering what she was accusing me of right now.

"Honestly, I wasn't trying to start shit or anything. I just wanted to see if he would be able to help Lydia out with the year. Especially stuff like homework." I sent, feeling like since I had less than two hours to go before the stream, I needed to probably get going on it sooner. Especially due to the fact that I lost two hours the previous night. So I needed to try and make up for it in some way.

"I know that you meant well. But with the fact that she was a grade lower than him, on top of the fact that she is your sister, I was scared that nobody would fucking like her enough." After she was telling me this, I sighed, and I was wondering if she was seriously throwing me under the bus.

"Look, that was not my intention at all. I guess that I just wanted to keep her safe." I said, and then I shrugged, and I started to work on my next vod, the one for April 18 2018, since I forgot the last few days, and then I went right back to work, just making sure I could respond to her other texts.

"So Todd, are you going to be able to go on another date on Sunday? I just felt like that might be a good tradition that we can start up." She said, and I smiled as she was saying this, and I felt like if she wanted to make that work out in the long run, then I would fucking take it.

"Yeah, I can. I was worried that with everything going on, you wouldn't want to be able to meet up as much. Especially since it seems like you are working hard at your pizza job now." I sent, and I was laying down on my bed, worried that I was going to be dealing with more texts about her job later on, which I was not in the mood for at all.

Before she responded, I was then getting another text. This time from Carlos. He hardly ever texted me, so when he did, I felt like I just needed to fucking respond to him right away, and not be fucking around at all. "So Todd, I was thinking about those conversations at my birthday party. You know, about the missing girls."

I rolled my eyes as I read this. Honestly not really in the mood to be dealing with this discussion right now. It was way out of my fucking league and patience to deal with this. "What were you fucking thinking?" I sent, not in the mood to deal with this more.

"I was thinking that maybe if Dan, and Benjamin too, are taking this as seriously as they have been lately, that maybe we should be looking into it as well. For all we know, maybe there really is something happening." After he said this, I sighed, not wanting to fucking hear this at all.

"Are you seriously buying this shit too? Nothing is fucking happening." I sent, and despite how sure I was when I sent that text, deep down inside, I really had no idea, and that was what scared me shitless. And I had no idea what to think now.

"I don't know dude. I just think that maybe we need to at least check it out. I mean, I know you never cared for that shit. But you know. Something always could be happening." He said, and I was shaking my head. I sighed, and I thought of the response I could make.

"If you want to, we can meet up tomorrow about this, and discuss it." I said, and then I was balling my fist in anger. I could not believe that I was choosing to fucking do this at all. This was fucking unbelievable that I was now going down this path.

Once I was done with this discussion, I started up my next stream, feeling like I just needed to get to work, and not be making things much worse for either Bebe or I. "Welcome to my Tuesday stream guys. I decided to start a bit early, since I had a late start yesterday, so I figured that I would try and make up for it." I said, and then got right to work, and my next game on the list was Fallout New Vegas.

Scene 19: September 9 2020 1:32 pm

After I took care of my video from April 20, 2018, I was then pulling my phone, and I was feeling like I just needed to remember my meet up with Carlos, so with that, I started to drive on towards his place, and I was just keeping myself fucking focused. I had not wanted to make this get any worse, no matter what was to happen at all.

Once I was there, and Carlos answered the door, this was when I was seeing that he was kind of looking a bit annoyed at this whole hang out. I was wondering if he was just upset that I had forced him into any of this in the first place.

"So, you decided that you wanted to try and fucking play hero, like the others? Are you sure that something like this is a good fucking idea?" I asked, and I was seeing Harold looking like he was really not in the mood to listen to me talk like this right now.

"That is not it at all. I Just feel like we need to at least check some things out. I mean, if there is such a obsession that the others have here, I guess that I just feel like there is a chance that what they might be saying is true. Nothing wrong with fucking checking at least." He said, as he was pulling out a couple of cans of Twisted Tea.

"Are you sure that drinking while you go around, and look around here, is a good fucking idea? I mean, there is a chance that you will need to be fully cognitive." I said, and I was seeing that Carlos was looking mildly annoyed with the way that I was acting right now.

As we were driving to the town library, I was seeing Carlos looking like he was not sure why we were even fucking heading there in the first place. "Todd, we are not going to fucking find anything there. This is going to be a waste of fucking time." He said, and then I was sighing, since I was just not really in the mood here.

"I don't know. Might as well give it a try at least." I said, and then I stepped out of the car, and then I was walking inside the library, and I was seeing that the librarian was looking like she was relatively bored with being here. I was closing my eyes, feeling like what I would be doing here was only going to make things worse for her.

"Hey, what are you guys looking for right now?" She asked, and clearly had no interest in really helping us. Well, I was not really planning staying there for long. I was just coming in here, to try and make a fucking point to Carlos, and nothing else.

"We were planning on asking you about the missing girl from earlier. You know, that Wendee girl. I was hoping that you would be able to give us a fucking pointer." I said, and then I was seeing her looking like this was the last conversation she would have wanted.

"Oh, I think the only paper related to that we have gotten was the news reporting confirming that she went missing." She said, and then she was starting to walk in that direction. I was shocked with how little she was seeming to care over something so fucking big and important.

Once we were there, she simply shrugged. "I wouldn't really worry too much about that. Nothing comes from these cases like ninety eight percent of the time." She said, and then she was starting to walk off. I was sighing, since I was feeling like this was a sign that maybe Carlos needed to just fucking drop it.

"Look, even the fucking librarian, who knows all this information, is telling us to fucking leave it. I think you need to just fucking let it go." After I was telling him this, I was seeing Carlos looking uncertain here. As if thinking that what I said didn't make sense.

"But why would she be so dismissive about something important like this? I mean, this is fucking huge. I mean, out of all these years, you can't tell me that every single person who went missing just happened to run away." He said, and he was sounding annoyed with the fact that I had been telling him this, and I was really not in the mood at all.

"I know that. But for Wendee specifically, she literally said that there is no fucking information. And I have no reason to doubt her. So I think that maybe we just need to think about that." I said, hoping to get him to fucking leave us alone at this rate.

Carlos was pulling the paper out, and he was looking along at it, and he was just wanting to see what he would make sense out of in all of this. "To be honest, I think that maybe you'll need to try and talk to Bebe about what you fucking know. She might be willing to tell you more." As he was telling me this, I was looking at him, unsure of what the hell his endgame was.

"I am not going to be forcing my fucking girlfriend into this. That is where I have to draw the fucking line." I said, hoping to make myself clear. As I was telling him this, I was seeing Carlos looking like he was just finding my statements to be a bit hard to understand.

"Why are you so fucking scared here? I mean, it's just a library paper, is all." He said, and then he was rolling his eyes, probably feeling like I was thinking too deeply into something like this. Probably thinking that I was sabotaging myself.

As he was saying this, I sighed, and felt like I just needed to consider what he was asking me for once. "Carlos, I have no idea what will make you guys all see that this whole thing is fucking nonsense. There is no way in hell that this is all actually fucking happening." I said, and I was feeling like I just needed to get him to fucking leave me alone.

"I feel like it is this level of complacency that probably makes this whole thing happen anyways. I mean, all that I am saying is that maybe Benjamin might not be so fucking wrong after all. And that we need to listen to him more." Carlos said, as I wondered what in the world I would be able to tell people to just get them to fucking shut up, and stop this bullshit.

"Carlos, spare me the bullshit. I mean, I think you need to remember that I had somebody who grew up with all of this, and probably knows more about this town than we ever will." I said, and then I was seeing him looking kind of upset with the fact that I was bringing my father up once again.

"Never mind. Forget I even brought this up. I should have known talking to you about this was going to be a waste of time." He said, and then with that, he was walking off, and I was staring ahead, just trying to decide what in the world I was even wanting to say right now. I shook my head, not in the mood anymore.

Scene 20: September 10 2020 2:42 pm

The next day before I really got deep into it, I started to upload my April 25 2018 vod onto youtube, making sure I actually stood on top of those. And when I was looking at my account, I saw that in the stream last night, after I immediately returned home from the library, bitter at my fucking friends, I had gotten about sixty dollars. That extra exposure was really helping. Both in terms of pay and amount per hour as well.

When I was at home, and I was just getting everything ready, I got a random text, and this one was one I was not really expecting at all. It was from Josiah. I was feeling like it must have been fucking serious if he was texting me in the middle of a school day.

"Hey Todd, when you were in school, did you ever have the police coming to you and asking around when it came to the people who went missing?" After he asked this, I was sighing, since that one was rather random, and I could not fucking answer that question, since it had never happened that way before.

"Honestly dude, that never fucking happened. I think that honestly, after a point, most people just kind of got used to people going missing in town, and stopped looking into it." I sent the text, although him talking about this made me feel much more interested in what he was dealing with.

"Yeah, it seems like the police are really cracking down on this. It feels so fucking scary having officers in the school. Will let you know more later." He sent, and I sat down, unsure how in the world to feel right now.

"Well, good luck on that. Just don't do anything too dangerous. Don't need to be going around, and trying to play a fucking hero." I sent that text, and then put my phone away, feeling like I just needed to leave this whole thing alone.

Eventually, there was a knock on the door, and I was answering to see who it was, and when I saw that it was Bebe, I instantly fucking smiled, and I was feeling so fucking happy to see her at the house right now. "Hey Todd, I was just wanting to make sure that you were doing well. It seemed like everything that had been going on lately has really gotten to you." She said, and I was smiling, feeling like that wording was under stating it by a lot.

"Yeah, I have been having a hard time just trying to get my friends to fucking relax, and leave this whole thing alone. I mean, I am working my ass off every single fucking weekday, trying to give my parents any fucking money at all. And these people are going around, trying to find a fucking story about missing girls. It's just fucking bullshit." I said, and I sighed as I was telling her this.

"Oh yeah… It seems like that has been going on a lot. Sorry to fucking hear about that. Must be rough with everything going on. I will admit though, I am surprised that Dan still has any interest in it at all. It's been three fucking weeks so far. You would think by now, he would let it go." She said, and I was slowly nodding, fully agreeing to what she had just said.

"Often times, I just feel like people just want to have immediate fucking answer for everything going on, and hardly fucking see how much worse they are making things." I said, and I was shrugging, feeling like I just had to be fully fucking honest as I said that.

"Todd, how about we just stop thinking about what you're fucking friends are doing, and we just find a time to fucking hang out for the night. Forget everything that is happening here? I mean, there isn't much going on right now… But the school talent show will be coming up in a couple of weeks. We can plan for that." After she said that, I smiled, knowing she was just trying her best to make things better for me.

"Josiah has been really fucking excited for that one for a while. Has been talking about it all the fucking time. I think even Seth will try and throw his hat in the race at the end of the day." I said, as I was looking behind me, and seeing the younger siblings all having a good time.

"I do wonder how you are going to get a job anyways. With the fact that you have so many younger siblings who are not in school yet. And the fact that both your parents work during the weekdays. In all honesty, I think you might just need to focus full on in those streams. You know, work at home…" She said, and I was shocked to hear her say that.

"You might be right honestly. I mean, I guess that I wanted to help. But if I go around, and get a job during the weekdays, then they are going to be left alone. And Henry is doing well for a five year old, so if it was just him that would be one thing. But the other four are not ready for that." I said, just thinking about what I was saying here.

"I could maybe see about night time security. You know, watch over the store and their tapes in the time that the store is closed." I said, feeling like that might work. "But I might have to discuss with my parents. If even they think this might be a bad idea, I will just fucking focus on the fucking recordings. You know, make it a full time forty to sixty hour a week thing."

"I mean, I wouldn't have suggested it if it weren't for the fact that you are already getting money from it." She said, and then I was slowly nodding, feeling like I needed to just consider the point.

"And besides, if you just tell you're friends that you're going to fucking spend time on these recordings, and you can't fuck around with the girls investigation and shit, then they might respect your space a bit more. They might at least be willing to leave you alone for a bit." She said, and I sighed.

"That might work with Carlos. But I think for Dan, he might be too far into this whole thing to listen to me saying this. Honestly, I feel like a fucking fight is going to be coming up between us soon, and I am going to be dreading the day it fucking blows up." I said, and I was feeling like if this was to happen, I would rather have it happen now than later.

"If you seriously think he will be like this, and is beyond discussion right now, then I think that you need to just fucking stop hanging out with him as much. I mean, I know you like him as a friend. But put yourself first." After she was saying this, I was sighing, and had no idea what to tell her at all.

"I mean, I feel like if I do, then I might just leave him high and dry. And he deserves better than that. Harsh feelings aside." I said, and then I was sighing, feeling like telling her this was simply just not going to fucking settle with her at all. She would just never fucking get it.

"Yeah, that might be a bit rough. You wouldn't want him angry at you forever." Bebe said, and I wondered why I was even dealing with this in the first place. "I mean, I just want to make sure that you are ready for something like this." She said, and I sighed, feeling like I needed to see her perspective a bit.

"I'll just try and talk to him about it again. This is getting too much, but I don't want to get rid of him forever." I said, feeling like we could work this out. I sighed, and I was feeling no point in talking about this shit any longer. It was too much to handle.

Scene 21: September 11 2020 3:53 pm

The next day, after I uploaded by April 27 2018 vod, as I was getting ready to start my session, this was when I was seeing my father, and I was feeling like I just needed to fucking see what he was going to be able to say to what was happening. Maybe he would have a fucking clue what was happening.

"Hey dad, I was wanting to ask you something important." I said, and then he looked at me, and I was seeing him looking like he was slightly annoyed with the fact that this was happening. He looked at me, and I was feeling like I just needed to be careful here.

"What is it about?" He asked, feeling like he needed to at least pretend like he wasn't going to be slightly annoyed with what was happening. I sighed, and I felt like I just needed to be super fucking careful with my questions right now.

"I wanted to fucking ask you about the Wendee girl who went missing? What do you think about all the stuff going on here?" I asked, and then my father was instantly getting a serous look on his face. Feeling like the fact that I was bringing this up was a sign that things were about to get much worse for him.

"Todd, I know what happens to those people. I saw it with my very fucking eyes when I was younger than you are right now. This isn't a fucking game. You have got to fucking stop this shit right now." My father said, sounding furious with the fact that I was even bringing this up in the first place.

"I know it's fucking serious. And I am trying to get my friends to stop looking super fucking deep into this. I feel like this is going to get them killed." I said, feeling like I just needed to try and get my father to be more open with me here.

"If you know it's serious, then just let me do my damn job, and you just fucking focus on your games. You are making a lot of money on those, for streaming standards. I think you need to just see that this is the best case for you." After my father was saying this, I sighed, and I just wanted to find something to respond with.

"Look, I am trying to get them to leave this shit and rumors of labyrinth alone. I know it's fucking bullshit. And I want them to fucking see that." I said, and then I was holding my fist tightly, My father was just remaining silent as I was telling him this.

"Labryinth? And monsters? Are you serious? Todd, you're nearly twenty one. You're not a child anymore. The fact that your friends are believing that shit shows that you need to have a better friend group." He said, and then I was kind of pissed at the way that he had said that.

"Dad, you know what fucking happened down there, and I need you to fucking help me out. I never believed that bullshit, but it is the fact that women do go missing every few months. And my friends are just not letting it go, even when I'm personally not focused on it." I said, and my father shook his head, unable to handle this at all. Probably thinking that I was just trying to make shit up right now.

"I know what happened down there, and I can confirm your friends bullshit and stories are not what the truth is. And your denial on the subject being around at all is another issue." He said, and I was shaking my head, feeling like everything was suddenly making me the bad guy.

"People associate that grinder with the sound of death and shit. And I almost see where they are coming from honestly. After all, every time it happens, somebody goes missing. Are they running away?" I asked, and I was seeing my father looking like that one stung as he heard what he said.

"Todd, stop this subject right now. You don't understand what is happening. You need to let it go. I understand being curious, but I am putting my fucking foot down." My father said, and then I was sighing, and I wondered what to say.

"My friends accuse me of not caring for Lydia. Like I never cared for the women here." I said, and then after I said this, my father stopped, and started to walk towards me, and I saw him looking like he was no longer playing with me right now.

"Look, I might be sounding like a asshole as I say this, but you need to just recognize that this is something you have nothing to do with. So when I leave, you better go to your area, boot that fucking xbox up, and play your fucking video game so you can do your damn job." My father said, and then he was looking at me, as if wondering what I would say. "Do you get me?"

I slowly nodded, and he was sighing. "I'm sorry. But after all my friends I lost, and the pain I have had to deal with, I will not lose my fucking son because he ended up getting the same piqued interest that I did. This is some important shit, and I am one of the few who knows what to do. So I'm going to do my job, as long as I am fit to do so." With that, he started to head off, and I was feeling him saying this was probably extra confirmation that this was not a joke at all.

When I was done with my conversation with him, I sighed, and I went on and went to my stream, knowing that I was a few minutes late, and I was feeling like the fact that my dad told me to play a video game was something that I never expected.

Scene 22: September 12 2020 2:00 pm

When I woke up that day, I was driving towards the gas station, and I was feeling like I just needed to try and talk to Benjamin. I needed to try and fucking clear some things up with him, and see what he might be able to fucking tell me.

As I was there, he looked up at me, and I saw that he was clearly looking like he did not want me to be there at all. I was shocked at the level of anger that he was showing when he was seeing me there. I did not realize that I had pissed him off that much already.

"What are you wanting to fucking talk about this time? You made your opinion on this whole thing very clear, and I have no idea why I need to fucking waste my time with this shit right now." He said, and I was shocked at the tone he was using to make his point.

"I wanted to just see if you would be willing to talk to me for a bit. I mean, I just want to see what makes you so fucking convinced that there is really a labyrinth going on here. I want to understand." I said, and I was seeing Benjamin looking like he was trying to fucking believe what I was saying, and think that I might be telling the truth.

"You already know everything here. The fact that you are still denying what is happening is a fucking sign that you are refusing to fucking let go, and that is not my fault anymore." Benjamin said, and then I was feeling like he was just making things worse for me.

"Do you even fucking care what is going to happen to your sister? I mean, if you really did, then I feel like you would have found out what fucking happened to her years ago at this point?" I asked, feeling like I just needed to throw that at him, to make him see how it was like when people accused me of not caring for Lydia at all.

"Dude, you really shouldn't be saying that to me. I mean, unlike you with Lydia, I actually went around, and tried to take some fucking action. If you can't fucking see that, then that is your fucking fault." He said, and I was feeling like I just needed to be careful with how I worded my point.

"Well, I mean, come on. You keep talking big about all the shit you are going to fucking do. Fucking acting like you're the god damn hero of the town. And yet you have made no progress whatsoever. To be honest, your sister is probably dead by now, and you just can't fucking accept that." I said, feeling like I just needed to be fully honest with him.

"At least I don't fucking deny what is happening around this town. At least I can own up to the fact that things go beyond my fucking family, and that I need to fucking take things more seriously." He said, and I was feeling like his way of fucking trying to throw me under the bus wasn't helping him out at all.

"If you are this fucking wise sage, then fucking tell us everything that is happening. Fucking say it! Or maybe the fact that there is nothing here, shows that you are just fucking crazy, and you are letting your delusions drive you down a road of insanity." I said, feeling the need to finally just try and fucking mess with his mindset a bit.

Benjamin grabbed my face, and slammed it down on the counter, and I yelped in pain as he did that. I was then holding my head a bit, wondering what was wrong with him. "What the fucking hell man?" I asked, and then he jumped over the counter, and started punch me.

"I am so sick of your shit. Accusing me of not caring for my sister, calling me crazy, and in general acting like I am a fucking idiot." He said, and after some punches, I started to hit back, feeling like his reaction was going way too fucking far. But despite every punch I was able to throw at him, he already had gotten a bit of a advantage on me right now.

I tried to hold my own for a bit, and managed to push him away, and then get another hit before he got a lot more momentum, and kept hitting me in the face until I started to hold my hand up, and pleaded with him to fucking stop. He made his fucking point, and at this rate, was going way too fucking far with it.

"Dude, you really are going way too far with the shit you tell me. That is getting fucked up. Honestly, my life would probably be better if I just never had to fucking talk with you again." Benjamin said, and the harshness of this was something that I was not fucking expecting.

It was at that moment, when he was basically admitting that me being gone entirely would make him feel better, when I realized that I had gone way too fucking far, and needed to stop this shit for once in my fucking life.

"I just need some fucking evidence. You haven't give me any." I said, and then I was starting to head towards my car, feeling like I just needed to try and fucking keep him calm. "If you would, then this would be avoided."

As I was saying this, I saw Benjamin looking like he was considering what I said. He seemed to think that what I said, while bad, was fair, and probably true to a degree. And I was happy to see him looking like he was at least considering what I said.

I eventually made it to the video store, while still beaten up a bit, and I was walking inside, feeling like I would explain to my interviewer the issues that I was having right now. I was hoping he would be able to work with me a bit. But I was also aware that with the way that Benjamin had acted, I might have gone way too far, and I just needed to think about what to do to change it all.

"Hey, what the fucking hell happened to you?" He asked, and I was sitting down, and I was placing the cold can of Baja Blast, on my wounds, and he handed me some ibuprofen to help me ease my pain at least a little bit. Which helped out a fucking ton.

"I got into a fight. With one of the people I went to school with. Basically denied that there was a labyrinth or any shit at all. And he was upset with my claims." I said, and then I was shaking my head, feeling no need to discuss it any further.

"Oh, okay. That is strange. Some people do take this stuff way too fucking seriously. But I am not here for that. I am here to see if you are ready for a fucking job here." As he was telling me this, I was sighing, feeling like I just needed to get into professional mode.

"Do you think you would be able to work several days a week? Like say, every weekday?" He asked me, and I was sighing, and I was wondering if I should go along with this, or just listen to what Bebe had told me for once, and just give up on this idea, and focus on just watching my family.

"I believe that I can, within reason. I have a bunch of younger siblings, who aren't able to go to school yet. So I might only be able to do a few hours, at least until they're a bit older." I said, and then by that point, he was slowly nodding, feeling like that was fair enough.

"I mean, usually after eleven, one of my parents might be home for a bit. So I might be able to work after that point. But anything earlier than that is out of the fucking question. And I have a second at home job, but I can bend the hours if need to on that. But if I do full shifts, I wouldn't be here after seven anyways, it seems." I said, feeling like I just needed to give them everything that I could. My boss seemed to think about that for a bit.

"Okay. I guess that I can fucking take it. Anything after eleven. I will try and fucking remember that. And usually after a certain point, when school is done, then I bet one of those siblings will be home, and watch over them then anyways." He said, and I wasn't really liking the way that he was taking this. But I was feeling like this was better than nothing at all.

When I was done with this discussion, I went home, and before anybody noticed what was wrong with me, I went to Ridge's room for the weekly update, and took a picture of him, and smiled as I was aware of the fact that he was now already three weeks old at this point.

Scene 23: September 13 2020 11:20 pm

That next thirty six or so hours, I kept going around, and around mentally, thinking about what I had said. To Benjamin, and thinking if maybe the shit that my friends were saying about labyrinth might have had some fucking truth to what they said. After all, some shit really was sketchy.

As I was finally uploading my vod really late that night, and as I was starting to wrap things up, Bebe sent me a text, and I opened it up. "What the fucking hell happened?" Bebe asked, and I was forgetting that I was supposed to go on a date with her, and forgot to cancel. I figured that I would come completely fucking clean.

"To be honest, I got into a fist fight with Benjamin. It was kind of my fault. I told him that if he cared for his sister as much as he said, he would fucking have found her already, and not be making bullshit excuses." I sent the text, feeling that the honesty might be something she would respect.''

"Todd, I think you need to try and apologize to him. That seems to be kind of really fucking messed up. I mean, you even skipped your fucking date with me tonight." She said, and I considered what she was telling me for a bit.

"Look, I know that I need to fucking apologize to him. I was planning on doing so soon. And then when this is done, we can fucking have our date or something. Honestly, I just need to fucking fix this up before I do anything." I texted back, hoping that my offer to go to the date afterwards would get her to feel slightly better right now.

"Todd, I feel like you need to start seeing what you are doing, and take responsibility for the shit that you are doing. Unless if you do that, then I feel like you might not be ready for this yet." After she said that to me, I sighed, and I was feeling like she was really fucking trying to guilt trip me into this.

"You're right. I'll at least try to do something tonight. If I don't see him tonight, maybe I can try again in a couple of days. I don't want you to think that I don't fucking care." I said, and then I was sending my text, hoping to get her to at feel slightly less bad about what I would say.

When I had that text conversation with Bebe, I felt even fucking worse, and I was feeling like I just needed to try and apologize to Benjamin, and make him see that I did feel bad for the way that I had acted earlier. So with that, I was feeling like making things right was the first thing that I could be able to do.

I started to get to my car, and I was taking a cigarette out, as I was driving over towards his house. I was feeling like I when I would try to make things right with him, then things might start to get slightly fucking repaired.

The entire time that I was driving there, I was accepting the fact that in all honesty, I fucking knew that I was clearly in the fucking wrong. I made some real fucking mistakes, and I was feeling like I just needed to try and give him a chance to explain everything to me.

Eventually, I parked the car, and I was getting out, wondering what in the world I was even going to be telling him at all. I knocked on his door for a bit, just mentally telling myself to fucking talk with him, and make things up.

As he answered, he was looking like he had not wanted me to be here at all. Probably thinking that I was going to be starting shit again. I slowly sighed, well aware of what he was meaning here. "Dude, I just want to clear up some things. I'm really sorry." I said, and he shook his head as I said this.

"You said some really fucked up shit. Telling me that I never fucking loved my sister? That was taking it way too fucking far." He said, holding his fucking ground as he was telling me this. I slowly nodded, feeling like I just needed to hear what he needed to say.

"Look, I guess that after all the shit that people were saying about me not liking Lydia, and thinking that she was a mistake, fucking got to me. But that in no way justified what I did or said." I said, feeling like owning up to what I said was the best that I could.

"Look Todd, I understand that you might not want to fucking admit it, but there really are things happening in this town. I understand if you do not want to get involved, but don't fucking go around, and pretend they're not fucking real." He said, and I sighed, feeling like he had made his fucking point to a annoying degree.

"My dad will fucking not tell me what is happening. And when that happens, then I am completely left in the fucking dry on what is happening. So when people tell me something is happening, they are not giving me any fucking evidence." I said, and I was then just trying to not focus on the fact that my head was still slightly wobbly from the punches.

"Why has he never told you anything? He probably should so you can fucking understand why this is a terrible fucking idea." After Benjamin said this, I sighed, not really in the mood at all to hear this.

"I mean, he probably just thinks that if I just never get into this, then I might lose interest in it over time. I mean, I never had any interest in this. But I know that many fucking people are." I said, wishing that I would have been able to explain it better. But that was just simply not going to happen.

"Todd, do you actually genuinely believe that nothing is happening?" After he was asking me this, I sighed, since in all honesty, I wasn't sure what in the world I was even going to tell him at all. In all honesty, I really had no idea I could have responded with.

"Honestly, I am not sure at all. To be honest, I feel like what you are saying is probably true. I mean, I feel like deep down, I know that something really is happening right now. But part of me genuinely wants to believe that there is nothing going on at all. Or at the very least, that the story is being completely over blown." I said, as I was feeling like I had over stayed my welcome.

"Todd, if you feel this way, then why do you feel the need to constantly talk with me? You made your fucking apology. You can fucking leave me alone now. Just because Dan is doing this doesn't mean you have to." He said, and then I looked at him, feeling like he would simply never fucking get it.

"I don't know. I do not want to see my friend Dan in fucking danger. And because of that, I am willing to fucking stay with you guys, even when all you are doing is totally fucking bullshit." I sighed, and I was feeling like saying this would get him to fucking leave me alone for now.

Eventually, we were seeing a car pull up, and both Benjamin and I were looking relatively shocked at this. "Look, I feel like with two of us here, then there is nothing that you need to worry about. I can try and fucking keep him safe." Benjamin said before the person left the car.

It was Bebe, and I was smiling as I had seen her, but I was kind of annoyed with the fact that she was here at this important time, and I was feeling like she needed to give me a fucking chance to work this out. "Bebe, I am doing fine." I said, trying to fucking make her feel better about what I was doing here.

"I just wanted to make sure that you were really out here, trying to fucking make things right. I can see that most of the stuff you said to him might have been really messed up." Bebe said, and I was closing my eyes, feeling like she did not need to fucking kick me while I was fucking down in the first place.

"Benjamin, if Dan wants to keep looking into this, then I have no fucking choice but to fucking help you. And in all honesty, as much as I hate to admit it, I guess that I know deep down inside, that something is fucking happening right now." I said, and I was shrugging, not sure what I was going to say.

"Do you really want to do this? I mean, you have Bebe with you, and I feel like that is enough of a reason to not want to go into this." After he was telling me this, I looked at Bebe, and I was actually kind of considering what he was saying. I sighed, feeling like I just needed to come clean about this whole thing.

"That is her fucking choice. I just know that I went way too fucking far with what I was telling this, and I know that you are never going to fucking accept my apology right now." I said, and I was rubbing my eyes for a bit.

"I mean, I think that Todd did go way too far. But I think that maybe you guys just need to maybe just bury this, and either move on and pretend this never happened, or you guys can actually find something that you guys can actually do together." After Bebe was saying this, I really had no idea what else I was even going to tell him at all.

"Let me see if I ever find something that might be able to work this out. But until then, I think it might be best to just keep our distance with each other." Benjamin said, and I was slowly nodding fully agreeing with him here.

"Yeah, I was sort of feeling the same way, to be honest. Just text me when you have something you want to discuss." After I was telling him this, I felt like there was nothing else to fucking say at all. I was smoking a cigarette, and felt like I was a failure at this moment.

I looked at Bebe, and I was feeling like I needed to give her some fucking credit here. "Thanks for kind of helping me see the fact that I needed to just own up, and apologize." I said, and then I was feeling like saying this, was enough to make things better.

"I guess that I can tell Dan and Carlos what happened. And maybe we can just go on that next date. Maybe tomorrow." I said, and I was feeling like doing this might make things better for her. Bebe looked like she was appreciating my effort, and I saw Benjamin looking like he was just still kind of upset with everything, but seemed willing to let it go for now.

When I was done, I started to drive home, and I was feeling like there was no reason to be so worried about this anymore. I really had no idea why in the world I was caring so much what some random guy was thinking at all. I mean, I knew deep down, he probably hated me forever.

I was home, and I went right to my fucking room, and didn't even bother trying to talk to anybody else. I was feeling like none of them were going to get it, or fucking care, what was going on in my mind at all. I was just kind of over this all.

Scene 24: September 14 2020 2:40 pm

Before the end of the school day, I was getting another call from the video store. I was not really in the mood to be dealing with this right now. But I wasn't wanting to be fucking rude, so I was feeling like I just needed to at least try and fucking be nice.

"So Todd, I was thinking about the interview that we had earlier, and I was thinking that you would indeed be somebody I want to give a chance to. I'll have to think of some hours to give you. I remember, nothing before eleven in the morning." He said, and then I slowly nodded, feeling better at what he was doing.

"Alright. I guess that I can work with this. I mean, it's better than fucking nothing." I said and then I was smiling. "Thanks for giving me a chance. Talk to you again later." I said, and at this rate, I was feeling like our points had been made, so there was no point in going any further with it than we already had.

I hung up, not really feeling any need to go on any longer. When I was done, I sat down, and I was feeling like this was going to be how my life would be now. Working a job and streaming video games five days a week, and fucking tired as fuck because I am trying to make the financial issues at least slightly less bad for my family.

As I was feeling like I just needed to get ready to start streaming, since my session was only a bit over an hour away, that was when I was getting a text from Bebe. I was smiling at the fact she was still reaching out to me. But I knew what it was going to fucking be about.

"I just wanted to let you know that I appreciated the fact that you actually did go out there, and try to make it work. I knew you weren't a bad guy at heart. But I just felt like you might have went a bit far." She said, and I was sighing, since I wanted to just forget about it.

"Look Bebe, I feel like I just needed to do it. I mean, it might have been hard for me to finally open up, and admit that I had made some fucking mistakes. But I did, and I just wanted to fix it." I said, and then I sent another one before I was going to try and fucking drop this god damn subject once and for all.

"I think the fact that my father was telling me that there is indeed something going on, and pleading me to not look into it anymore, because they're not games, as he says, makes me feel like maybe it is best to just leave this alone." I sent, and I was then looking at the game queue, thinking about what I would do next when I was finally done with New Vegas.

"Oh shit? You're fucking father said that? That must be serious then." Bebe sent, and with that, I put my phone back, and then this was when I was seeing Henry and Calvin in the living room together. Seeing Calvin there, and working on his speaking, was kind of making me feel a bit better. I could see that Henry was trying his best to be there for these younger siblings.

I think it was because of the fact that he knew this was the last year before he went to school, and wanted to give them all at least a bit of a head start when it was coming to their fucking lives. I smiled as I was seeing this, happy to know that they were no longer screwing around at all.

I was then standing up, and then talked with him for a bit. "Thanks for being there for the kids so much Henry. I appreciate it." I said, and I smiled, hoping that this would be a statement that would make him feel like he was doing good work here. As I said that, I was seeing him looking shocked to see me actually giving him this much credit in the first place.

"You're welcome. I know you do a lot." He said, having a mild annoyance in his voice, although he was trying to hide it. I sighed, feeling like I needed to try and fucking understand him. After all, I did kind of hijack his last year of relative freedom. I just hoped he would not be judging me forever.

Once I was heading to my room, I felt like I needed to try and respond to Bebe, and give her something. "When my father of all people says shit like this, I start to think that maybe I was fucking wrong with what I was telling Benjamin. And all you people. My father wants me to stop with this… So clearly my feelings aren't true." I said, and I was hating the fact that I had admitted this out loud. It felt fucking wrong to do so.

I only had to wait a little bit before she already sent me my next response. "If you know something is happening, and you know that your friends want to check into it, then what will you be doing?" She asked me, and I could tell that she was clearly trying to fucking coax me into agreeing to look into this. I was feeling kind of annoyed with the shit that she was clearly saying right now.

As I was then thinking about what I was doing, this was when Henry called out to me again. I looked at him, and I was feeling like he already judged me enough at this moment, and I just needed him to fucking give me a bit of a break here.

"Do you think you'll ever be able to hang out with us again?" Henry asked, and then I looked at him, and I was wondering what he was fucking meaning as he had said that. He was targeting me in a relatively subtle tone here.

"I want to. I really do. I will try my best to soon." I said, and then with that, I started my system up, and I was feeling like I just needed to fucking calm down, and not be making a giant issue out of this for the time being.

I went back to my texting, thinking that I would get as much of a conversation in before the stream started, that way any last lingering thoughts would be able to be given. "Whenever they approach me about it, and they feel the need to check something out, I'll look with them. But until then, I'll just live my day by day life." I said, feeling like that would be good enough to suffice for the time being.

"Fair enough. I know you start your streams earlier on Monday, Wednesdays, and Fridays. Would you be willing to have a date on Tuesday or Thursday?" She asked, and I was smiling as she asked me this, feeling like the fact that she was still giving me some hope was enough to keep me going for the time being.

"Yeah, we can fucking do that." I sent, and I was smiling as she was sending me this. "How about Thursday? Say meet up at four, and go until seven?" I gave that second brief reply, hoping that this would finally kick into formation before long.

"Great. See you then." She said, and then I was reminding myself to not fucking cancel this time. I was shocked that she was so understanding of it the first time, and I was feeling like I needed to count my fucking blessings here.

As I was placing my phone down, I was seeing Henry over there, and he was smiling as he had read part of those texts, and he was feeling like he would use this as a great time to start fucking teasing me. "Todd's in love…" He was telling me, and then I was shaking my head, feeling like he would understand more when he was older, how much it was worth fighting for people you cared about.

"Leave me alone dude. It's not fucking easy, trying to get the girl you like to still be willing to go with you." I said, feeling like I just kind of needed to be firm about what I was fucking telling him at this rate. He was smiling, finding my comments funny, and probably thinking that I was taking these things way too fucking seriously.

As we were having this little dabble debate, I was getting another fucking text. This one was from Dan. I knew what it was going to be about right away. "Hey, I was hoping that the two of us could be able to meet up tomorrow, and do some town digging. I know you have made your opinion on the matter perfectly clear. But you promised to protect me." He said, and then I sighed, well aware of this fact. As much as it annoyed me.

"Okay. If you say so. But please have a plan this time. I will draw the fucking line if you are just going to be doing mindless wandering." I said, feeling like I was just needing to make myself fucking clear as I was telling him this. I was smiling as I said this, proud of my statements here.

"Fair enough. I was thinking of asking the mayor a couple of questions. I was hoping that with your fathers reputation, that would help." He said, and I sighed, feeling like this would a bad idea. I felt like I just needed to give him what he had wanted.

"Okay, If you want to do that, then go ahead. I will be there as well. But that doesn't really mean that I am going to be asking stuff. Especially if word gets out that I was there with the mayor, my father would be fucking furious." I said, feeling like I was just needing to put my fucking foot down as I was telling him this.

"I guess that does make sense. Your father always seemed to be a bit rough on that subject. So I guess that I can see what you are saying. I will keep you out of it. Just say you're there as a witness." After he was telling me this, that was when I nodded, feeling like that would be good enough.

"The one thing I might ask of you is that would you be willing to record the conversation? That way we can listen to it later?" He sent the text, and I sighed, feeling like this was where I needed to fucking put my foot down to his nonsense. But I didn't want to outright say no, yet.

"I'll think about it." I sent, feeling like the conversation had run it's course, and then with that, I ended up ending that text conversation. Thinking about my fucking date on Wednesday. I just needed that to work out more than anything else.

As I was done, I was then looking at the younger siblings. I was feeling like I had left them way too fucking behind, and I was feeling utterly horrible for everything that I had done. I was feeling like I made some real fucking mistakes this whole time, and I hoped they didn't hate me anymore.

"Sorry that I hadn't been there for you lately Henry. Ever since Ridge as born I started to get too busy for your own good." I said, feeling like I just needed to be responsible for my actions. As I said this, I was feeling like I just needed to not be fucking around much anymore.

"I promise that I'll try to set aside more time with you guys. Maybe watch some of those movies you like, or whatever." I said, not in the mood for this right now. But I wanted to not feel guilty. I wanted to not have my siblings fucking hate me for whatever god damn reason.

"Thanks Todd. I would really appreciate it." Henry said, and then I smiled as he said that to me. As long as it didn't get in the way of my streams, I was feeling like there was no excuse to be holding off as much as I had. After all, he was still really young, and he needed the confirmation that I cared for him.

I sat down, tired, and feeling like I just needed to fucking relax, and not be making too much of a hassle over this anymore. I felt like nothing else I would do would even fucking matter anymore. I felt like no matter what I did, I was going to get people pissed off at me, and make me feel like I was a shitty human being no matter what.

But then I looked at my account, and I had seen that throughout all the streams I did last week, I had acquired nearly three hundred dollars. When I had a chance, I needed to withdraw half of that for my parents, and just give them a little bit of extra coverage going forward. I just needed to, for my own fucking sake.

As I was realizing how close it was to my stream time, I started to upload my May 2 2018 vod onto youtube. By this point, I had completely given up on my daily thing, and I was just trying to make sure that I got at least a few in every week. Although I had noticed that I already had over ten subscribers, so I was clearly getting some fucking traction on what I was doing here.

When I was done, I ended up looking at the presidential polls this weekend. I had forgotten to do it last weekend, but the site only updated on Fridays, so it was still relatively present. It was showing Donald Trump with 282, and Joe Biden with 962. In the last week, Iowa had flipped to Trump's column in the polls.

Scene 25: September 15 2020 5:31 pm

Dan and I met up the next day, and we went right to the mayor's office, not screwing around at all. I knew that this was just the best way to fucking play along right now. I knew that Dan was dead set on this, and while I didn't approve, I was not going to fucking fight him.

Once inside, I was pressing play in a cassette tape that I took from my dad's office, and I was hoping beyond all hope that he wouldn't fucking ask. I was just really hoping that he would actually take what I was saying seriously for once.

The mayor looked up, and he was seeing me here, which was clearly giving him some anxiety over what I was doing. "So what were you fucking wanting?" He asked, clearly just scared on what we were going to be doing here. That put a fucking smile on my face. Way more than it ever should have, to be totally honest.

"I was wanting to ask you some questions. So a couple of weeks ago, the latest in a long string of people going missing occurred. A girl named Wendee. We were hoping you knew what was going on with that." Dan asked, feeling like this would be a good way to get him going here.

"Okay. I will be honest, I am shocked to be seeing you here. I thought that your father would have balls to fucking approach me on his own when he wanted to fucking ask shit." He said, looking towards me, and I put a smile on my face, enjoying his clear worry much more than I ever should have.

"To be honest, I am doing this on my own. My father has nothing to do with it." I said, smiling, and then I was seeing him looking like this was exactly the response that he had been expecting from me. Then he shrugged, and he was just getting back into business right away.

"Look, the truth is that after many of the girls were found dead, in this very town, I have been forced to really fucking crack down on what is happening here. Both for your guys sake, as well as general town moral." He said, and then he was shrugging, feeling like what he was saying was just a simple part of how the town was doing.

"Yeah, but that was almost sixty fucking years ago dude." I said, slowly remembering my fathers lessons. "Even the shit in the eighties is nearly forty years ago. I think even the most cynical person in the world would probably have grown to let it go then."

"Honestly, you are probably right. But the president of the Lazarus Corporation took over when he was extremely young. Even younger than your oldest brother. And when that happened, he wanted to show the town that he was at least pretending to fucking care." He said, clearly having a judgmental tone in his voice as he was saying this.

"If that is the case, then why hasn't he cracked down on anything yet?" Dan asked, clearly sounding like this president needed to really step up his game. The mayor was smiling at the way that he was being asked this. Clearly showing that despite everything else, we were not nearly as ready for this as we pretended.

"Because he did for a while, but then he reached his early twenties, and a combination of his friends dying around him, as well as him starting to slowly buy into corrupt deals and favors, began to turn him into the man he swore he would fight. Then by the time he was in his mid twenties, he had already virtually lost all of that fight in him. And now he just really keeps a watch on various places, to make sure there is at least some leash." The mayor said, smiling as he said this.

"But even then, that is one person. And that has nothing to do with Wendee. Or Benjamin's younger sister." As soon as Dan brought that one up, that was when the mayor really took a noticeably sour face. As if he knew that he had been had.

"Look, I know that the five year anniversary of his sister's disappearance is coming up. And that one really shook the community to their core, with the fact that she was twelve. The youngest one ever. At least that I remember. But the truth is that we literally found nothing. It was a total dead end." He said, sighing, and kind of sounding regretful at this.

"The truth is guys, is that you guys have lost. There is nothing to get out of this. You're adults now. Start fucking acting like it." He said, and then he was standing up, and then shrugged. "These questions would have been somewhat charming if you were seventeen. But now not so much."

"So you do admit that you know what is going on?" Dan asked, and I was just remaining silent, taking every word he said carefully. Needing to just fucking make a plan here.

"I mean, I never suggested otherwise. But the truth is that you guys looking around into this isn't going to do any fucking favors. Trust me when I say that. If you care so much, talk to Rob Reichenbach. He might be willing to help you." He said, and he sat down, taking a cigar out, and then saw us leave.

I pressed the stop recording button, and looked at Dan, shrugging, knowing that he didn't get what he wanted. But at the end, I was not shocked at all. This was something I saw coming from a god damn mile away. But I choose to not be rude about it.

Scene 26: September 16 2020 2:38 pm

I was meeting up with Carlos, still having some time to go before I had to start my stream, and to be honest, I was feeling kind of glad to be meeting up with him. "Hey, I wanted to apologize for the way that I acted earlier. You know, at the library. I think deep down, I knew you were right…" He said, and I sighed, not really wanting to go down this fucking conversation again.

"Carlos, why did you think you would even fucking find anything there in the first place? I mean, you know that Benjamin and Dan were pursuing something that had no fucking grounds to actually being considered real." I said, looking right at him, hoping he would take what I said seriously.

"I don't know. I just thought that I might have fucking found something there. Besides, I mean, you can't deny that they're right. There is so much shit going on here, that it feels like somebody probably at least knows more than they are letting on." He said, and then looked right at me with the talk about my father.

"Dan and I tried to talk to the mayor earlier. He basically seemed to fucking know that we were getting onto him, and he probably was just trying to find a way to get out of this discussion." After I said this, I saw him looking like he was kind of pissed at what I had fucking said just now.

"Oh god. What the fucking hell dude? Are you just trying to get yourself killed right now?" He asked, and I was shrugging, feeling like he needed to try and harass Dan over that.

"Dan has gotten obsessed with this shit. He will never fucking let it go. And he claims that he is being some fucking hero right now." I said, and shrugged, taking a cigarette out. "To be honest, I feel like either Benjamin or Dan are going to fucking die soon."

"I heard that you and Benjamin got in a really fucking bad fight. Do you want to talk about that?" He asked, and I shook my head. I wasn't in the fucking mood at all. This was all just a load of fucking bullshit.

"Yeah, I did. But we made up. At least mostly. We just basically agree that until something shows up with the investigation, that he feels like is irrefutable evidence, then he will just leave me alone." After I said that, I shrugged, feeling like that was good enough to go off of.

"I feel like that is sort of my personal stakes with him. He leaves me alone, and I leave him alone. Simple as that. With Dan though, because he's my friend, I feel forced to fucking go with him until the end, and that is the thing that fucking kills me." I said, and I was feeling like that was going to be enough to slightly drop the fucking subject for now.

"But Dan and him have been working together a bit. Or at least talking a bit. I think that something like this is much harder to fucking accomplish than you want to admit." He said, and I was rolling my eyes, feeling like he wasn't telling me anything new.

"I know that it is. But I feel like he understands that I have my own personal stakes here, and he probably feels like as long as we don't fucking argue about it anymore, than that will be enough of a alliance to keep us going." I said, feeling like that was going to have to suffice for him. As I said this to him, I was seeing that Carlos looked like he wasn't sure what to fucking say right now.

"This doesn't fucking feel right. But I am not going to fucking argue with you about this." After he was telling me this, I sighed, and I was feeling like he was just making this way too big of a fucking issue. He was aware that he was only making things worse the way he was talking right now.

"Besides, honestly, I am just kind of neutral to this whole thing. I acknowledge some sketchy shit is going on. But I don't want anything to do with looking into this. So whatever happens just fucking happens." He said, and I was wishing that he would be able to show me how he was able to feel that way.

"I wish that you could get me to fucking think of the world that way. I mean, I guess that I just would be too scared to see the world for what it is if I knew what was happening. But I hope that in due time, somebody would be willing to just lay it all out."

I looked at him, and when I saw the smile on his face, I felt like I just needed to ask him what was going on in his mind. "Carlos, what are you fucking feeling?" I asked, feeling like I just needed to get him to tell me everything that had gone on in his mind.

"Well, I just wanted you to know that I was going to be heading on a date soon, so soon you're not going to be the only one who has a girlfriend." He said, with a shit eating grin on his face. As he said that to me, I was shocked that he said that in the first place.

"Oh shit. That's awesome man. Got any plans on the date?" I asked, feeling like I just needed to fucking help him if he really needed it. He shook his head, not in the mood to have me giving him this advice.

"We were planning on going to see some movies. I heard that now with all nine out, they are planning on doing a three day long re-release of all nine Star Wars movies. One trilogy for each day." He said, and I almost forgot about the fact that he was a Star Wars guy. He didn't talk about it too much, but he always had a interest in it.

"Oh yeah? I wonder if she would actually want to do that." I said, looking at him, feeling like he needed to be sure of that before he sent her down this path. But in all honesty, he probably at least consulted with her before he made these plans.

"Don't worry about it dude. You seem to be all doom and gloom with this shit. It's just a fucking date." As he said that, I choose to not react, and choose to just fucking leave things alone for the time being right now.

"Well, maybe me being doom and gloom is because of the fact that I don't want to mess things up with Bebe when she is one of the brightest people that I ever met, and I feel like any relationship should be like this." After I was telling him this, I shrugged, and I was feeling like what I said made perfect sense.

"Do you think that things are working well between the two of you right now anyways?" He asked me, and I was looking at him, wondering what angle he was playing at right now. If he was accusing me of not getting along with her, then I was feeling like he needed to chill.

"I believe we're doing great. I get you're concerned. But there is nothing to worry about." I said, hoping to make him feel better about what I was saying. As I was saying this to him, I was seeing Carlos looking like he was just trying to fucking believe what I was saying.

When I got home that night, I was ready to get right to work. I knew that I couldn't waste any more time on this, and that I had been putting things off for far too long. I just took a deep breath, and started my recording, hoping that over time, I would start racking in larger quantities of pay day.

Scene 27: September 17 2020 3:42 pm

I was meeting up with my date with Bebe, and when we were sitting down, even though I knew she wasn't too upset anymore, I felt the need to still apologize for this. "Hey, I know that it's fine now, but sorry about the whole date situation. I know that you deserved better." I said, and then I was looking right at her, hoping she would forgive me.

"It's okay. I mean, I still feel like you made a really big mistake with the way that you talked with Benjamin. But it seems like you learned your lesson, and I guess that at the end of the day, I can't be too upset with the fact that you seemed to understand what you did that was wrong." She said to me, and I was shaking my head. I still felt like part of what I said was justified. But it was a bit much, I would admit.

"And in all honesty, I kind of knew when you didn't show up that something happened. I just assumed it was with your family or something. Not what actually fucking happened." After she was telling me this, I was closing my eyes, and I was feeling like her way of talking about this was only making me feel much worse.

"Yeah, I mean, I could see something happening to Josiah or something like that. With all the times he just goes out during the night, it kind of bothers me a bit. But I mean, he still hasn't gotten himself in danger yet, and he's old enough to understand when to call the police if danger arises. So I feel like I need to give him some credit." I said, and then I shrugged as I was telling her this, feeling like I just needed to be charitable with him right now.

"Do you feel like he would be a bit upset if you tried to reach out to him though? I mean, I get that he is at the age he needs to do whatever he wants, and needs to make his own choices. But he still might need help here and there." She was telling me, and then I shrugged, simply not sure of what I was going to tell her at all.

"I have no idea what is going on in his mind. To be honest, I feel like he just needs to do what he believes is best for him. And I guess that I will just try and fucking help him out as much as I fucking can." As I was taking a cigarette out, I was unsure with how I was going to even fucking respond to this.

"How has Robbie Dan been this school year so far?" I asked, and I was kind of feeling bad right now. I mean, the year had been back for nearly two weeks, and I virtually did not check up on them at all. I wouldn't be shocked if my siblings think that I was just trying to exert control over them now.

"He's doing well. He just seems to be a bit focused on just getting his assignments done though. He's mentioned Lydia a couple of times." Bebe said, and I looked at her, and I think she knew that I was going to take the bait here.

"What did he say about her?" I asked, hoping that he had at least some nice things to say about her. I mean, I can understand how she might be a bit much to like, but at the end, I still hoped he was at least tolerating her presence.

"Just that she was having a really hard time adapting to school so far, and he was worried that she wasn't actually going to make any friends. I guess first grade stress." Bebe said, shrugging, and thinking that was perfectly natural.

"I mean, can you blame her? She has only been around boys pretty much her whole life, and probably doesn't really know how to interact with girls." As she said this, I was slowly sighing, and I was feeling like I just needed to try and keep calm.

"Can I see Robbie soon, and try and see what he knows?" I asked, hoping that Bebe would come around to this idea. As I asked her this, I was seeing her kind of looking a bit concerned over the way that I had been acting right now.

"What he said was perfectly harmless. I think you need to give him a fucking break dude." Bebe said, and then I was shaking my head, aware that she mis understood what I was saying.

"It's not that. I feel like if I talk with him, I might be able to figure out what I can do to help my fucking sister." I said, and then after I was telling her this, I saw her looking like she was still finding my reaction a bit fucking worrisome.

"Oh, okay. I was worried you were going to react a bit differently, to be honest. You know, since in all honesty, you can get pretty up and arms about various things here, I was worried you would be doing the same here." She said, and she was smiling, knowing that I was starting to learn some of my lessons from the Benjamin incident.

"I know that you probably don't think much of it. But this is something that I feel like I need to take rather seriously." I said, and then I was smiling at her, hoping that she was going to see that I was doing my best for my younger sister here.

"Okay. Sorry that I was judging." She said, and then I was sighing, and I was feeling like it would take a while for her to really fucking get it. I was taking a cigarette out, and smoking it, feeling like I just needed to fucking calm down, and not be thinking too deeply on it.

"I mean, if it was one of the brothers, that would be one thing. Considering the fact that I know he will turn out fine. But with Lydia being the only girl, I know everybody is going to make fun of her over shit like that." I said, and I was having a level of anger in my voice. Knowing that they were going to be making things just miserable for her.

"Okay. I will try and see what Robbie Dan knows." Bebe said, and then I was calming down. I felt like I just needed to take things calmly, and not be too much of asshole about this. After all, Bebe was just telling me this.

"Thanks. I'm sorry. I mean, I know you meant nothing about it. You probably didn't even think I would be taking it as seriously as I did." I said, and I was trying my best to fucking see her perspective. "I mean, I just know that she is a good person deep down, and I think she deserves better."

"Well, I think that sooner or later, she will need to be left alone, and see the world for herself. After all, she is a school student now. She's not a fucking baby. She needs to branch out on her own fucking right." She said, and I was trying my best to keep calm, and see what she was saying. I knew deep down inside, that she was right, and that I was being way too ridiculous with this right now.

"I think she really needs to have at least the first year under her belt though. Once she's in higher grades, I have to understand that you're right. But this is her first year. I think she deserves a fucking guide here." I said, trying to calm down, and I was trying to just not be making things much worse right now for everybody.

"I guess that makes some sense. I mean, I was like you as well. Having a hard time letting Robbie Dan go when he was in first grade. I was scared that something would happen to him. But I guess that now that I know he is doing fine, I just need to not be worried." She said, and I was slowly nodding, and I felt like I would need to not make a issue out of this.

"I want to fucking feel this way. Honestly, I really fucking do. But I guess that I just need to be fucking careful here." I said, and then I was shrugging, feeling like it was only a matter of time before people would start coming towards me demanding for more.

"I think the fact that you are so worried about her right now shows that the statements people made about you with Lydia are false. You are wanting what is best for her, even if it means putting things on the line a bit." After Bebe was telling me this, I was thinking about what she said. I felt like even though, it was too soon, I just needed to be upfront with her.

"I think that I love you." I said, and then I was seeing her shocked face, as if unable to believe that I had said that. Probably thinking that I might have said it way too fucking soon. But I hardly cared. I wanted to make it clear to her what I was feeling.

"I didn't expect you to admit it so fucking soon." She admitted, while looking right at me, and I was seeing her looking like the confession was more than enough to get her blood running, and her to be blushing.

"I mean, it's been nearly four weeks. I feel like it is fair game now." I said, and then I was just trying to find out what I wanted to say. "I just wanted to really get to know you before I was able to say for sure." I said, and I was feeling like what I said was true.

"I guess that's true." Bebe said, and then she smiled, feeling like the confession was enough to really drive a feeling of happiness with me. I was feeling like I just needed to fucking run with what I fucking had at this point in time.

"I will see what Robbie knows. Just give me some fucking time. I am sure that he will be more than willing to fucking talk." Bebe said, and then I was slowly nodding, feeling like that was all that I fucking needed to make me feel better.

"Please fucking do." I said, taking a cigarette out, and I was feeling like we were happy now. I was happier knowing that she was willing to fucking talk with me right now. Knowing that she was no longer worried here.

"Do you feel like you will ever try and quit those?" She asked, not even judging me. Probably feeling like she was just trying to fucking help me. I simply shrugged, not thinking much of it right now.

"I mean, one day I will try. But I mean, I don't have a family of my own yet. So there is no giant incentive right now." I said, and I was aware what I was saying was wrong. But I hardly fucking cared at all anymore. I was going to just have my opinion.

"If you say so." Bebe said, and then she seemed to drop it for the time being. I was glad to see that she was willing to not pursue the issue too much further right now. I just needed to fucking focus on the moment right now.

"Maybe next Thursday?" Bebe asked, and I slowly nodded, aware that she was already trying to set up another date with me. I was just hoping that I could make this fucking work. Even if I did get some shifts at the job.

"If I have a shift that day, you can just come by, and we can hang out there." I said, trying to make her feel better about what I was feeling like was going to fucking for sure pop up. I was seeing Bebe looking like she wasn't too sure what to feel about my offer just now.

I was home that day, feeling like the date was good enough to more than make up for being cancelled. As I started my stream up, I was feeling like I more than delievered, and I was feeling like the positive energy was going to transfer over to my fucking audience, and I felt like they were going to fucking see it here.

Scene 28: September 18 2020 3:17 pm

Dan and I were meeting up the next day, and this time I actually didn't mind it. I felt like I really needed to talk about the information that we talked with the mayor about before we ended up forgetting it. "So Dan, do you feel like the mayor is going to be responsible for everything that is happening here?" I asked, and I was seeing Dan looking like that was excessively obvious.

"I don't think he might be strictly behind it as much as definitely letting it go on. He mentioned that Lazarus Company a few times. I think that might be a good starting point." He was saying, and I was sighing, aware that I needed to at least consider that idea before anything else.

"I just heard some things about those men, and none of them good, from my father. I guess that something like this should make some sense." I said, and then I shrugged, thinking about what I was even fucking telling him right now. "Dude, I think that I might try and fucking talk to my dad about it again. Sooner or later, he is going to fucking open up. I just need more fucking time." I said, feeling like I was just more convincing myself of this, than I was convincing him.

"I think you know as much as I do that he will not fucking do that. I think that the best course of action will be to honestly just go on and talk to that president figure. Or maybe his son." He was saying, and I remembered that he actually did have a son.

"I think he might be in the same grade as Gabe, or something. I guess that I might try and talk to him about it." I said, and I was shaking my head, unable to believe that I was actually fucking suggesting this idea in the first place.

"So you don't mind bringing your oldest brother into this?" He asked, more of a for confirmation sake, than a way to judge me. I simply nodded and shrugged, thinking that there was nothing wrong with it in all honesty.

"Well, he's certainly old enough to fucking be ready for it to be honest. I think that at the end of the day, he needs to make his own choices now. Maybe even fucking Josiah. It's really Seth and lower where I draw my fucking line." I said, feeling like that was fair enough for Dan to understand.

"I'm honestly kind of surprised you're even agreeing to this anymore." He said, and then I shrugged, feeling like I just needed to be totally fucking real with him at this rate. Hopefully this level of honesty could get him to respect me more.

"I'm just smart enough to know you are not going to fucking back down no matter what I fucking do, so at this rate, I might as well just let it fucking happen. After all, I know you always tried to do things your way." I said, hoping that he wouldn't take offense to the way that I was saying it, or think that I was attacking him too fucking aggressively.

"Well, I guess at this rate, you do actually fucking know me after all." He was saying, and started to smile for a second. As if glad to be seeing that I was no longer messing around with him at this rate. "So anyways, let's just fucking get to work right now. So you mentioned that Gabe can possibly talk with that presidents son. What other plans do you think you can go with?"

"I don't fucking know. I think the library is not going to fucking help. And to be honest, I genuinely believe that Benjamin actually does know more than he is letting on. I think that maybe you should really fucking go and try to reach out to him once more." I said, and then I was looking at him, hoping he would fucking listen.

"I don't like it. But I guess that I just need to fucking be realistic." As I said this, I was standing up, and I was closing my eyes, unable to believe that I was actually fucking agreeing to this in the first place. I had hoped that if there was a god, he would forgive me for everything.

The moment that I started to go towards my car, feeling like I had honestly over stayed my welcome, that was when Dan was calling out to me again. I turned around, to see him, and I was trying to hide some of my sadness right there.

"Todd, do you think you are going to be telling Bebe about what you fucking found? I mean, she's also an adult, like Gabe. I think she deserves the right to know." He said, and I was shrugging, and I really had no idea what in the world I was even going to tell him.

"I think that is her choice. I mean, you do have to remember that she has a younger brother, Dan, and I feel like I just need to fucking let her have her time with him. If she doesn't want to worry about that, and just focus on making sure he grows up well, then I refuse." I said, feeling like with their massive age gap, she needed to focus on that first.

"But doesn't she also have a brother that's much older? Or has this Bebe girl started to really change you?" He asked, trying to see if he could rile me up. I had no idea what he was even fucking trying to fucking accomplish right now.

"Yeah, but he's fucking twenty eight. He's old enough to be Robbie Dan's fucking father. I feel like it would be best to just not deal with that for the time being. I would rather have her just focus on what is most important to her." I said, and I was feeling like fighting this with my friend was going to make things worse.

"And what do you mean, changing me?" I asked, and then I was seeing the look on Dan's face look like he was glad that I was willing to challenge him on this fact. It was like he was wanting to fucking see me open up like this.

"I mean, she's turning you into a fucking soft pussy. You no longer have that style you used to have. Now you're just all safety and work. I kind of miss the old you." He said, and then I shrugged, feeling like he was just being ridiculous right now. He knew that he was just baiting me with his comments right now.

"Maybe that is because I realize that I am finally having something that I fucking care about. I thought this would be something you would fucking want." I said, as my patience for his comments and his attacks were starting to kind of make me feel a bit attacked for no fucking good reason at all.

"Well, maybe that was before I saw that it would completely throw everything away. Once I saw that, I guess that maybe I just started to fucking change." He was saying, and I was really not in the fucking mood to have this discussion right now.

"Is that why you care so much about this fucking case? Because you're not a soft pussy, as you say? You're fucking rough, and you fucking mean business? Is that fucking it?" I asked, feeling like I just needed to fucking tackle his statements a bit. As I said that to him, I was seeing him kind of looking shocked to hear me even try and fucking tackle the subject like this in the first place.

"Maybe. I mean, if you really knew what you were wanting to do, you wouldn't always be fucking talking about siblings. You would be talking about yourself. And you're always doing those streams, and not really going out, and doing shit for yourself." After he was telling me this, I opened up my car door, and then shook my head.

"I'm just going to fucking talk with my brother about maybe reaching out to the presidents son. That is all that I am fucking promising." I said, and then I shook my head, feeling like the more that I would counter act what he was saying, the better that things would be for me.

"Thanks. I would really fucking appreciate it." He said, and then he was putting another smile on his face. Feeling like he just needed to fucking get me to see that the bait was fucking working. He was walking up to me, and then he was thinking for another moment.

"Look, I think that you might be right about Benjamin. If you are, then I feel like I will have to fucking see what he might know. I just hope that he isn't fucking scared here." As Dan was telling me this, I was slowly nodding, feeling like I just needed to listen to what he was telling me right now.

"That makes perfect fucking sense. Just keep safe. And remember, tomorrow is the five year anniversary. Even I might come on and at least say hello to him before the day is over." I said, feeling like he needed that fucking assurance that I wasn't completely fucking holding him down anymore.

"That's a good idea." He said, and then he was starting to let go of my door, and I was taking a deep breath. Feeling a bit better, knowing that he wasn't completely fucking bitter towards me was making me feel at least a little bit fucking better.

With that, I started to drive home, feeling like I now had my plans for tomorrow. Once I was done with my weekly check ups, I needed to get to work on maybe seeing how Benjamin had been doing, for the time being at least.

When I was home that day, I uploaded my May 4 2018 vod onto youtube, and I was getting my system ready to go. Knowing I was a few minutes late, but honestly not even fucking worried about something like this right now. Since I was still fucking trying to make it work out at the end.

Scene 29: September 19 2020 5:31 pm

That day, I did my weekly check up and picture of Ridge. And every single time I was checking up on him, I was just shocked as hell at how much he had already grown in just four weeks. I was having a massive smile on my face, knowing that he had been around for a little while now, although he was still sleeping through most days.

I checked up the presidential polls again, since it was that time of the week. It had shown that once again, Trump had slightly closed in the polls, but still not enough to really give him the win. He was now expected to also pick up Ohio, and win 327 electoral votes to Biden still getting 917.

After my weekly check up, I also called my store manager, to see if he was willing to give me some hours next week. Once I called, I told him what it was a about and I was glad to hear him sound as excited about it as he had seemed. "I actually need these time slots filled up, with your availability in mind. Monday the 21st 11 to 6. Tuesday the 22nd 11 to 7. Wednesday the 23rd 11 to 4. Thursday the 24th you can have off. And Friday the 25th 11 to 4. So that'll be 25 hours. Call me again on the 26th for your shifts that week."

I had him repeat the numbers once again, and then I thanked him for his time. "I'll tell my parents about it. Thanks." I said, and then hung up, and then I went to my twitch channel, and posted my starting times for each day that week. Monday at 7 pm, Tuesday at 8 pm, Wednesday at 5 pm, Thursday at 3 pm, and Friday at 5pm. Which added to 28 hours when all said and done.

When I was done with that, I was glad that I had my slate of hours for my first week, and then texted my dad my video store and twitch schedule, and then I started to head to the gas station where I was going to speak to Benjamin once again.

Once at his store, he was smoking a cigar, and he was looking like he had been mildly drunk. I smiled as I was staring at him, and I sat down, feeling like I would just keep my jokes to myself, not wanting to be a total fucking asshole right now.

"Hey Todd, how have you been lately? Sorry about the beat down last week." He said, with a slight smile on his face. Probably the smug satisfaction of knowing he was indeed stronger than me, and probably thinking that he would never let that shit down.

"I just wanted to see how you were doing. Considering the fact that today is the five year mark of when your younger sister went missing." I said, feeling like I just needed to drop the bad guy act, and just see what he genuinely needed right now.

"Never better. Always allow myself a bit of drink on the anniversary. The one day of the year I don't give a fuck if I get caught. At least if I'm in prison, then nothing can happen to me." He said, and then I was shocked at his mentality as he was saying this.

"Have you found anything in the last few days?" I asked, feeling like I just needed to let him have the floor, in case he needed to talk to me about something really fucking big.

"No fucking clue honestly." He said, and then I shrugged, as if feeling like something like this was incredibly fucking obvious. But I felt like I would at least try and see what he might have known. "I just see with every passing year, my parents giving up all fucking hope anything will happen." He said, and then he shrugged as he was saying this.

"I guess that you're the only one that still hasn't given up hope yet." I said, and I wasn't even saying that to be smug of anything. To be honest, I wish that I was able to feel that way when it came to everything going on here. I wish that I was able to fucking see the bright side.

"Yeah, I mean, I guess that I always just wanted to feel like something could fucking happen. I mean, I want to see her fucking come home. I loved my sister." After he was telling me this, I sighed, and I was feeling like I just needed to respect what he was telling me at this rate.

"So Todd, what makes you come here anyways?" He asked, and I was shrugging, feeling the need to start being honest with him. Not giving off any bullshit, especially since I was feeling like I already kind of done that too many times already.

"To be honest, I was worried about you. Wanting to make sure you were doing well. I just feared that you were going to potentially do something that would put you in a lot of fucking danger." I said, feeling like telling him this would give him some fucking material to respond with.

"Oh wow. I was never expecting to hear that from you of all people. I was expecting that from maybe say fucking Dan. Or hell even Bebe." Benjamin said, and he was starting to not have as much of a slur already. I was feeling like what I was saying was a good wake up for him.

"Yeah, I know. I just feel like I kind of can be a real asshole, and I need to fucking change that. People just are taking things way too seriously. And I guess that maybe I was scared about that." I said, feeling like there was no need to be hiding what was going on in my mind.

"I know that I just kind of exerted my beliefs on everybody, and that was my fault." I said, feeling like the deeper I was in my confession, the better that things would eventually get in the long run.

"It's okay. Chill the fucking hell out dude. I mean, I think that everybody is allowed to fucking believe in whatever they want. I think that I just made the mistake of not fucking seeing that, and just trying to get everybody to think the same way. We both fucked up." Benjamin said, and he smiled.

"Dan was hoping to talk to the president of Lazarus Corporation. Feels like that might be the best starting point. Especially after he failed to get the mayor to open up." I said, feeling like I would give him a fucking idea of what was going down. He looked shocked that this was how things were going now.

"What is this fucking dude thinking? I mean, does he seriously believe that something will be given to him?" He asked, sounding kind of pissed off at this. And I was genuinely shocked at this.

"He probably thought he was fucking helping. Give the guy some fucking credit." I said, and I was feeling like I just needed to be rather fucking careful here. As I said that, I saw him looking like he was just trying his best to fucking calm down a bit.

"Yeah, I guess that you might be right. I just feel like he needs to actually plan things out a bit, and fucking see that if he does this, then he will have a fucking massive ass target on his back." He said, shaking his head, unable to believe he said this.

"Just promise that you are going to keep him safe later on? That is all that I fucking want. I am already losing any desire to keep going with this. I am just too fucking tired to keep going at this rate, and I just want to fucking rest." He said, and sighed as he was telling me this. I slowly nodded, feeling like I just needed to let him have what he needed to fucking say.

"Okay. I guess that I can fucking do that. Although he already seems to not be very interested in working with me anymore. I probably burned his bridges too many fucking times." I said, and then I shrugged as I had said that to him. I saw Benjamin looking like he was fucking hardly caring at all.

"Look dude, I don't give a fuck. Just do whatever you fucking can here. That is all that I fucking need here." He was telling me, and then I was feeling like he was clearly just not going to be taking no for a fucking answer, so there was no point in even arguing with him at all.

"Okay, I fucking get it. I'll do it. And if I find something related to your sister, then I will fucking tell you what is happening." I said, and then I was smiling at this, feeling like telling him this would be enough to calm him down a bit.

"Thanks. I mean, he is probably the closest to a friend in your group. And the only one who believes in me when I say all this stuff." He said, and then I slowly nodded, feeling like I just needed to give him what he needed to be better off.

"And I will make sure that when Lydia is old enough to be ready, and know what is going on, I will tell her what I know. Maybe I'll make a letter or something or her. To be read when she graduates high school." I said, feeling like this was something that maybe she fucking needed.

"That's still twelve years away. But I assume you don't need me to pester you. You probably are already planning things out as best as you can." He said, and I shrugged, feeling no need to argue with him at all as I was saying this.

"Well, she has ten brothers at her side who will make sure she is fine until then. I think that she is probably going to do more than well enough." I said, mainly trying to convince myself than I was trying to fucking convince him. I knew he already made his mind up here.

"Fair enough, I suppose." He said, and he seemed like he was genuinely considering my proposition a bit here. He smiled, a fake smile obviously, but at least he was trying to sound happy, and that was something that needed to count for something.

I left the gas station, feeling I made my point, and was glad that we seemed at least on speaking terms again, which was more than I was honestly expecting after what happened earlier.

When I uploaded my May 9 2018 vod, I was aware that I was only a month or so away, in that tense, from when I had graduated, which was when I jumped right into the three videos per week instead of just two. Which meant that there was never more than like two days between videos.

Scene 30: September 20 2020 3:33 pm

I was meeting up with Carlos that day, which to be honest, I wasn't really sure if this was the best idea or not. Considering the fact that in all honesty, we had already met up rather recently, and as time was passing, I just felt less and less the need to be around friends who I felt never liked me much anymore.

"So Todd, I heard that you're getting the job. How do you feel about that?" He asked me, and then I was shrugging, not too sure what in the world I was even going to be fucking telling him. I just nodded, feeling like me getting a job at the video store wasn't really something to fucking write home about at all.

"I mean, it's money. And at the end of the day, that is all that fucking matters. I have to place my fucking family first." I said, and then I shrugged, and I was still feeling like that was the best way that I could place it. As I said that to him, I saw him looking like this was a rather anti climatic answer.

"I guess that fucking makes sense." After he was telling me this, he was shrugging, not really feeling the need to say anything else. "So Todd, does your family really like you getting a job? Considering the fact that you already do those streams so fucking much every week?" He asked, and then I shrugged, not thinking much of it at all.

"I don't know what they fucking think. I mean, if they are going to get upset over me just making the family revenue a bit better, then I think that is really going to be their problem." I said, and I was trying to just sound as firm as possible as I said that.

"Okay. Sorry. I just guess that I was worried that if you were going too deep into this, they might be judging you or whatever. I mean, my parents have been riding me over the fact that I'm dating a white girl." He said, and he was sounding incredibly annoyed as he was saying this.

"It's okay. And screw what your parents think. If they are going to be upset over superficial shit like that, then just fucking ignore them." I said, feeling like I just needed to be straight up honest with him as I was saying this. As I said that, I saw him looking like what I said was kind of egregious.

"I wish it was that easy. But I guess that sooner or later, I do need to be making my own choices, and I need to just not worry about what everybody else thinks for once." He was saying, and I was seeing him looking more and more confident as he had said that to me.

"See. And in all honesty, I think that they are just probably upset with the fact that they know that you are just doing your own thing, and you are not asking them around as much. They are just wishing that you would go back to those days where you would be asking them every bit of advice possible." I said, feeling like this statement would make sense. And in all honesty, I wasn't in the mood to discuss this.

As I said that, I was getting another text, I was rolling my eyes, not really in the fucking mood to see this. But as I was looking, I was seeing that it was Bebe. "Hey, I know you said you were working a bit late tomorrow. Would you be fine if I go to the video store, and we can just talk for a bit?" She asked, and I smiled as she asked that.

"As long as you do not distract me from working on customers when I need to, I don't see any issue with this." I said, feeling like I would just leave it at that. I smiled at this, feeling like whatever she wanted to talk to me about was probably super fucking serious, if she was willing to interrupt my shift to have this discussion right now.

"Yeah. I just wanted to check up on you. Especially since you seemed to be rather distant." She said, and then I rolled my eyes, thinking she needed to give me a fucking break. It had been like four days, and she was already declaring that to me?

"What's going on?" He asked, and then I looked at him, not really sure what to tell him. I just told him that it was Bebe wanting to meet up again, and I sighed at the thought of this whole thing.

"Dan wants me to basically force Gabe to talk with that one Jayson guy. You know, the son of that president in that giant fucking company. In all honesty, I want nothing to do with that. I feel like this is kind of in really fucking poor taste." I said, and I was shrugging as I was telling him this, hoping that I would get him to agree to me.

"Why would he want to do that anyways? That just seems so fucking random, honestly." After he had said that to me, I was sighing, not really sure what to even fucking tell him. He was right, the whole thing was bullshit, and any normal person should see that.

"Dude, I don't know. This is what I am trying to fucking tell people. He is getting way too fucking obsessed with this shit, and it is starting to fucking piss me off." I said, and then I was looking at him feeling like I needed to make my point.

"I didn't mind it when it was just him being ridiculous and stupid with himself. But him bringing my family into this is where I draw my fucking line. I feel like he needs to fucking stop this charade, and not fucking propose shit that is absolutely crazy." I said, and I was shrugging, feeling like I just needed to take a moment to decompress.

"What if Gabe has already met up with the guy before, and this wouldn't even be a ridiculous request?" He asked, probably just trying to find a way to give Dan at least the benefit of a doubt. As he was saying this, I looked right at him, and I was feeling like what he suggested was insane.

"Then I would not know my brother nearly as well as I could have thought I did." I said, feeling like I just needed to be honest with him as I said this. I shrugged, not feeling much need to say anything further. "But I guess that there is always a small chance something like this is true. I will see what he knows." I said, feeling the need to give it a chance.

I was then sighing, and I felt like everything that I was telling him was just kind of a waste of time. "Honestly dude, I just feel like this whole set up is really fucking stupid, and I do not want to get my brother involved. But I do recognize that he is eighteen." I said, and then I shrugged as I was telling him this, not wanting to admit he was able to make his choices.

"I think Dan is just very upset with how you have made it very clear that you want nothing to do with this, and probably feels like your brother is a good back up option." Carlos said, and in all honesty, I was still feeling like this whole thing was fucking wrong. This entire thing just rubbed me the wrong way.

"Well, I am being fucking smart is what I would say in counter action. At least I am not acting like I can fucking change the world." I said, and then I was sighing as I said this. I was feeling like everything that I was saying was just simply not going to fucking really settle in with him at all.

I was sighing, and I was aware of the fact that I was just being a bit of a asshole, and I just needed to fucking stop. So with that, I took a long and deep breath, and considered what I had been doing here.

"Well, good luck with Bebe tomorrow. And hopefully you can sort some things out with her." He said, and then I shrugged as I heard this. This was a fucking joke if I ever heard one. But I was not wanting to give him the wrong impression.

"It's okay. I Just feel like she might want to talk about Robbie Dan or some shit. Honestly, that seems to be the main thing she is worried about. But I guess I can't really judge her." I said, not feeling the need to say anything further here.

With that, I was feeling like it was a good time to head home. I was smoking a cigarette the entire time I was going home, and I was wondering if things would sort out as well as I was hoping. I knew deep down they probably would, but I was feeling like I just needed to be a bit more careful here.

When I was home that night, I decided to upload my May 11 2018 vod, and I was smiling as I did this, feeling like I was slowly catching up, and that my work was starting to really fucking come through, no matter what else was fucking happening.

Scene 31: September 21 2020 6:16 pm

Before I left that day, I ended up looking at my . Last week totalled out to 310 dollars, so sixty two dollars a day. I smiled as I was seeing this, and I was feeling like when I would add the totals from this job, I would be earning between five and seven hundred a week. Which was more than enough to fully contribute.

Soon after I was done for that day, I was talking to Bebe, letting her just fucking talk, and be honest with me. "So I just wondered if this friendship between Robbie Dan and Lydia might be a good thing. I mean, you were mainly setting it up to make sure that Lydia was going to have a person to rely on." She said, and I was sighing, as I was driving home, getting ready for my session.

"It was just a request. He is allowed to drop this if he wants. I mean, I am kind of shocked that he has even fucking stuck as long as he has." I said, shrugging, feeling like I just needed to give him some credit where it had to be fucking due.

"I know. I am just worried that people might be making fun of your sister. You know, having a older guy in her way, and just constantly enforcing that she is safe. I feel like that might be rough for her." After Bebe was saying this, I sort of shrugged, not sure what I was even telling her now.

"That is fine. I mean, you already gave me a progress update earlier. I just haven't taken the time yet to see how she was. I feel like that is more of my fucking fault, and not his." I said, and shrugged, feeling like I just needed to give Bebe a bit of comfort here.

"Okay. I guess that you probably know what you are talking about." She said, trying to make me feel better about this. I looked at her, and I was feeling like I just needed to try and make sure that she did not get so fucking scared about this.

"I'll talk with her about it tomorrow. How about that? Let's just enjoy the night, and tomorrow, I will see what to tell her. I am sure that she will be happy to hear that you are reaching out to her as much as you are." I said, and then I shrugged, feeling like I just needed to make her feel better about this.

"Thanks. I just worry a bit about these things. I mean, I always get scared that Robbie is going to have a fucking terrible school year. But he seems to be more on top of it than I want to give him credit for." Bebe said, and she sounded kind of upset with the way she said this.

"Yeah, I mean, I think that the thing with Lydia is sort of the same way. I think that once I sort of just accept the fact that she knows what she is doing, then things are fine. I just need to be keeping in mind that she knows that she is special." I said, feeling the need to put emphasis on that.

"I enjoy hearing you call your sister that. It makes me know there is indeed a soft side to you." Bebe said, and I rolled my eyes, not really caring to hear this. It was making me embarrassed, and I was feeling like she needed to just fucking stop with the compliments.

"Don't say that. It makes me feel a bit silly." I said, shrugging, and I felt like there was no point in even telling her something like this. Since she wouldn't listen.

"Okay. If you fucking say so." She said, and then I was feeling like I just needed to fucking relax a bit. Not even be turning things into a fucking ordeal.

I sighed, and I was feeling like I just needed to fucking relax, and stop being so fucking hard on her all the time. I felt like whenever I was speaking with her, she would find a way to make me look at what I was doing with uncertainty.

"Bebe, I just wanted to thank you for taking so much care in this family. It gives me hope this will all work out at the end." I said, and I was feeling like I just needed to give her this. As I said that, I shrugged, and I felt like there was nothing else to even fucking tell her at all.

"Thanks for that." She said, and then with that, I was feeling like everything would finally turn out for the best. I just needed to let it happen. "And I appreciate the fact that you are thinking that Robbie Dan will be doing just fine." She said, and I shrugged, feeling like she needed to give her brother a bit more credit than she had.

Before long, I was home, and I was ready to fucking go. I felt tired, and I was wondering what I was doing if it was for the best or not. But at the end, I just knew that as long as she was happy, then for now, that was what really fucking mattered.

I ended up parking my car at my house, and I was kissing her on the cheek. I smiled as I looked at her. She really was one of the most important people in my life. She might not see it. But she was making me feel so much fucking better about what I had been doing right now.

I kissed her as soon as I was feeling ready to leave. As I did this, I saw her smile intently, as if glad to see that I was not hiding my feelings like this at all. Probably thinking that I was finally growing to be more of a fucking man than she expected.

When I was home, I went to work putting up my May 16 2018 vod, and then I was getting right to the stream. Knowing that I was getting really close to wrapping up another play through, and feeling like if I kept this whole thing up longer, I would end up being like some form of unbeatable titan one day.

"I got a new idea for you guys. A new bit goal. No need to donate, but every time we reach a certain goal of the day, then I will extend my stream until 1 am, so a whole extra hour. For tonight, let's start with something simple, like say 1500." I said, and smiled as I said this, I felt like this would eventually help me long term, in both productivity, and revenue. With that, I went to work right away. At midnight, I hit the goal with 1600, so as promised, I ended up extending the extra hour for their sake.

Scene 32: September 22 2020 2:23 pm

That next day, during her lunch break, I was having a phone conversation with Lydia. Thinking that I just needed to kind of crack down on getting to know if she was really feeling all that good at the school so far, since I wanted to make sure that nothing happened to her.

"Hey Lydia, I figured that since nothing was happening here, I would fucking ask how you were doing." I said, and I was smiling at his, knowing that since I was going to be here for another few hours, I might as well do something that would keep me interested.

"I'm doing alright. Are you worried about how I am doing at school?" She asked, and she sounded both mildly annoyed, and also kind of happy that I was showing any interest in getting to know what she had been feeling at all.

"Honestly, Bebe was telling me that Robbie Dan was kind of worried about you not making that many friends, and he was wanting to make sure that you were doing well." I said, and closed my eyes, feeling like this conversation was going nowhere.

"Oh, he has been worried about me this whole time. If I didn't know any better, I would think that he had a crush on me." Lydia said, and she smiled as she had said that. I sighed at this, not really in the mood to be hearing this at all. I felt like she was just trying to antagonize me right now.

"Well, that is not my place to say. That is something you should fucking ask him on." I said, and I was annoyed that she was turning this into a conversation about her man crush. But then I just decided to not be making things too much of a issue.

"Okay. If you say so. You can take all the fun out of it. But nobody's been too mean to me since I started." She said, and then I was sighing, feeling like that was enough to make me feel a little bit better.

"Well, me being worried about my sister isn't exactly something that was meant to be fun." I said, feeling like I needed to just still show her that this subject wasn't a game. But I was glad to know that at least she didn't have any real issues. Yet.

"Okay. Well, thanks for checking up on me." She said, and then hung up the phone without giving me a second of thinking. I sighed, and I shrugged, just happy that she was doing well. So with that, I shrugged, feeling no need to make a issue out of this anymore.

Once I hung up, I kind of got the fucking message that she didn't really want to talk for too long. And when I was done with this, I was sighing, feeling like I just needed to fucking think about what I was even going to be doing going forward.

As I was thinking about what was happening, I guess that I wasn't too shocked that she was wanting to just kind of be left alone. It was hurting a bit to think about, but at the same time, I guess that something like this did make some fucking sense.

Before too long, Benjamin walked in. This one was kind of confusing to me, since I was wondering what in the world he was going to want to see in the first place. "Hey dude, I just wanted to see if you wanted to maybe talk for a bit." He said, and I sighed, feeling no real need to argue with him.

"Okay. What are you needing?" I asked, and I will admit, there was a minor annoyance that I was having with this. But I was feeling like I just needed to let him say what he fucking needed to say, and I would respond accordingly.

"Well, I was wanting to check some of the recordings here. See if there are any fucking archives that might be found related to my sister." He said, and then I looked at him with confusion, wondering how in the world he would assume something would be here in the first place.

"There is nothing in this shit hole dude. I mean, if you want to spend several minutes looking around the room, then go ahead, but there is nothing that will be found here." I said, feeling like I just needed to be straight up real with him as I was telling him this.

"I know that there isn't. But I just want to be one hundred percent sure. After all, I was told one time that when police look at stuff, they check everything no matter what, just to be purely fucking safe." After he said that to me, I was feeling no real desire to even fucking fight this right now.

I was standing up, feeling like I would just go along with him, to make it look like I was being intentive this whole time, and that would lower the risk of either of us getting in trouble. As we were walking along, Benjamin was thinking of a new question.

"So how do you feel about Gabe graduating this year? It seems kind of shocking to see your family moving up in the world." He said, probably just trying his best to be coming off as nice as humanly possible.

"Honestly, I feel glad for the guy. He is taking some steps into the world, and I feel like he is doing good. I mean, it does kind of suck that he won't even try college. But truth be told, that shit is not for everybody." I said, and shrugged as I said that.

"And who knows, maybe flat out rejecting college might be better than what I did, where I tried it for a bit, then lost all motivation to continue, and then fucking stopped." I said, feeling like I just needed to give him some credit where it was due.

"It still seems like you probably think that it would have been best for him to do it. Maybe for the experience?" He asked, and then I was shrugging, not having any idea what in the world I was even going to tell him here.

"Yeah, I think that is mostly it to be honest. I just don't want him to not have the experience that he needs to go out there in the world. And besides, I feel like he deserves better than what I did." I said, and then I shrugged as I told him this.

"Besides, I think that with Bebe there as well, the two of them might be able to have a better rest of the fucking year to be honest. I just feel like they both deserve better than to have me constantly watching over them, and trying to make sure they don't fuck up or some shit." I said, feeling like I just needed to be honest as I said that.

"Do you know if they have even talked with each other much since you started dating her? I mean, you two are really close, sure. But that doesn't mean Gabe and Bebe are…" He said, feeling the need to just be honest with me as he was saying this.

"Honestly, I have no fucking clue what they're up to. To be honest, I guess that I'm just not that worried about it. If they do not get along, then they do not get along. That is not for me to be judging." I said, as I was feeling no real need to go any further into this than before.

As we were looking around, Benjamin was pulling something out, and he was showing it to me. "Why does this one have no fucking cover or writing on it?" He asked, and then I was looking at it, feeling kind of interested in knowing about that as well.

"I don't fucking know dude. Honestly, that fucking confuses me as well." I said, and shrugged, and I was feeling like if he wanted to fucking check it, that was totally up to him. "Not to mention, it seems like it was just kind of thrown in there, with no fucking forethought." I said, getting a bunch of theories in my head.

"I want to check it out." Benjamin said, and then he was smiling. "If for nothing else, at least we can laugh about it later." He was saying, and I was still feeling like this wasn't exactly meant to be funny. But I was feeling no real need to argue with him about this for now.

As we were walking to the counter, I was actually kind of seeing Benjamin looking like he was excited for something new for once. "Why are you so interested in some fucking random shit that somebody probably threw in there?" I asked, and despite the fact that I was trying to be funny, I was kind of curious as well.

"I mean, you said you were interested as well. So I feel like we might as well fucking give it a shot. And I can just fucking tell you what I found." He said, and I was shrugging, feeling no real need to argue with him as he said this.

"Well yeah, but I mean, I don't really think it is going to be giving us much in the long run. This is just kind of random, is all." I said, and then I was shrugging, not sure what in the world I was even going to fucking tell him.

"Okay. If you fucking say so." He said, and rolled his eyes as he was saying this. I sighed, and I knew he was just not believing in me as I was telling him this. I was wondering if I was even believing in myself this whole time.

"Besides, I think that at the end of the day, my boss would probably frown upon me renting stuff for myself. I mean, he said he doesn't really care if I just chill around when there's nobody here, but I feel like that is where he would draw the line." I said, and then rung it up. But it failed, which kind of confused me.

I started to look around it, to see if there was something else that I could have been able to find, if I was going to be looking around hard enough. To be honest, I was just mildly annoyed more than anything else at this. I looked at Benjamin, and was shrugging.

"There's literally nothing in here that is giving me any idea what I need to fucking do." I said, and then with that, I shrugged, not thinking much about it at all. "So here's what we'll do…. You can take the fucking thing, and I will write down all the details relating to it, and you can just check it out whenever you fucking want. That way the boss knows that at least I tried…"

As I said this, I shrugged, and wondered why I was even fucking caring so much. I mean, Benjamin was the first customer I had the entire time that I had been here. Which was around thirteen hours in total now.

"Thanks Todd. I'll not mess it up or anything." He said, and then I sighed, and I was feeling no real need to give any nod or denial to this. If he was sincerely feeling this way, then I would just let him have his moment. As he was walking off, I was sighing, since I wasn't really in the mood anymore at all.

"Okay, if you say so." I said, and I was smiling at this, well aware of the fact that he was going to be doing just that. Screwing everything up, and I was going to have to be the one who would deal with his shit. But I was choosing to not be too much of a asshole as I was thinking this.

As I was smoking a cigarette, I was really having no idea what in the world I was even going to be feeling right now. To be honest, this whole thing was just kind of feeling like a fucking mess. Benjamin was looking back at me, and I was seeing that there was something else in his mind before he left.

"Just be careful dude. I don't want to be the one responsible if shit hits your fan." He said, and then I was shaking my head, not really in the mood to hear what he was telling me right now. If he believed in this, then that was his choice. But for now, I just wanted to move on.

Once he was out, I sighed, and I was getting back into relax mode, where I would not have to deal with any shit at all. I just wanted to fucking relax, and not deal with what everybody else was worried about for the time being. And to be honest, I was feeling scared that something was there.

I then placed my head on the desk, letting the cigarette burn, as I was catching a nap since there was nobody around. To be honest, I wasn't really thinking anybody would be here, so there was no reason to be so worried about it anyways. I had the bell on my counter, in case anybody showed up anyways.

Honestly though, if I got fired, while it would suck for me, I was making a lot of money on twitch, and I was feeling like I would just go full throttle on what Bebe was saying, with going into that, if need be. But for now, I was feeling fine enough as it was.

When I was home that night, I uploaded my May 18 2018 vod, and was feeling ready to go. "How are you guys tonight. For tonight, the goal will be 2000. Every time we meet the goal, I'll go up by 500, and every time I don't, I will go down by 500. No pressure though, it's just for an extra hour is all." I said, and then got streaming. By the time it had hit midnight, I was at 3800 bits, which far went beyond the goal for the extra hour, and for the second night in a row, I went until 1 instead.

Scene 33: September 23 2020 2:30 pm

When I was having no customers, I was using my laptop which I brought that day, and uploaded my May 23 2018 vod to at least get some fucking progress in there. And as I was waiting, I was just taking a second to think about what I was going to be doing for the rest of the night.

When I was sitting outside the entrance, taking a cigarette break, which I usually had every ninety minutes of so, I was seeing Carlos pull up. I was sighing, since I had been seeing him a lot more lately. And I was feeling like maybe I just needed to try and find somebody else who I could be able to hang out with for an extended period of time.

"Hey, I didn't expect you to be chilling outside? Just waiting for your shift to end?" He asked, and I casually nodded, feeling no need to pretend otherwise. Then he sat down, feeling like he would chill for a couple of moments before he left.

"Yeah, I mean, nobody ever fucking shows up. Benjamin showed up yesterday. But that is fucking it. One customer in three days." I said, and shrugged, kind of feeling like that was a bit anticlimactic. But at the same time, it gave me more relaxation.

"Yeah, I heard that people hate working here because it's so boring. But I assume you're not too worried about it right now?" He asked, and then I slowly nodded, feeling like his way of putting it might have been a bit blunt, but true.

"No, not at all. Why would I be worried about basically getting paid to relax on the internet? I mean, for fucks sake, after all the streaming I do, I feel like that is kind of a blessing." I said, and then Carlos laughed as he heard this.

"Not shocking. Especially since people usually watch shit on television now. I heard Benjamin's the same way. Where so many people go to retail stores that he gets like maybe ten customers every day." Carlos said, as I laughed at that. Ten would be action packed for me, by comparison.

"But regardless, when Benjamin was here last, he was kind of fixated on some fucking dvd that had nothing on it. I mean, it was interesting to me, but I felt like he was putting too much interest to it." I said, shrugging as I heard this, not sure what else to even tell him.

"To be fair, with him, you should expect everything to become a fucking theory. I guess that might be a part of why you were so tired of him after a point." He said, and then I slowly nodded, kind of glad that he was seeing what I meant now.

"I know. And that is something that I wished Dan would fucking understand. But I think that something like this is a fucking joke now. He doesn't fucking care or see this." I said, and I was shaking my head at this, kind of upset with this whole predicament.

"Well, I think by this point, you kind of just need to let it happen with Dan. After all, he has always kind of felt like something was going on here." Carlos said, and smiled as he said that, patting me on the shoulder.

"I know. That doesn't change how annoying the whole thing can be. I mean, this guy doesn't seem to think about what he is getting himself into." I said, feeling like I just needed him to fucking see how bad this whole thing could really fucking be.

"Regardless, I think you just need to relax a bit, and just let him do his own thing. After all, I think he probably doesn't want to lose you as a fucking friend." He said, and then I was looking at him, and I Was feeling like he needed to be more careful with assumptions like this.

"I know. I mean, I guess that I just don't want Dan getting himself fucking killed over something he should have never gotten himself into in the first place." I said, and then I shrugged, feeling like there was no point in arguing over this anyways.

"And in all honesty, I guess that I am just worried that if Dan does this all, then he will no longer want to see me as much. And I feel like something like this would kind of suck to be honest. I really want to make things work with him." I told him, hoping to get him to hear me out.

"That is something that won't fucking happen dude. I mean, I think he might be a bit distant for a bit. But in all honesty, I just feel like you need to accept that for what it is. After all, if this is something he prefers doing, then I feel like you are going to just need to make peace with that." Carlos told me, and in all honesty, I knew he was right. But I wasn't sure if I was wanting to accept that for what it was.

"I feel like if I do that though, then I would be letting him down, to be honest." I said, and then I was shrugging as I said this, and I was wondering if he was even willing to consider what I said.

"Todd, who are you more worried about? And be honest with me when you answer this… Your fucking family, and Dan?" After he asked me this, I looked right at him, and wondered what the point he was even trying to fucking say was.

"I mean, obviously I care more for Lydia than Dan. But Dan is still a nice guy." I said, and I looked at him, wondering what type of angle he was planning on playing at here. Either way, I wasn't excited at all for it.

"Honestly, I am saying that I feel like with the fact that you guys have clearly been at odds for a while, I feel like you need to be honest with yourself, and just stop fucking making shit up to make things better. I mean, I feel like most of this last month or so, you have barely fucking tolerated his presence, to be honest." After he said that to me, I sighed, not wanting to fucking hear this shit at all.

"I don't know. I still have hope that I can maybe sort some things out with them." I said, and I shrugged, wondering if such a thing was even going to be possible at all. Maybe I was just setting up for fucking failure now.

"Yeah, I guess if you want to seriously fucking believe something like that can work, then go ahead, and see what you can do. But dude, he's probably already made his fucking mind up on this." He said, and then I was shrugging, and decided to leave things alone for now.

"I just said what I fucking felt like needed to be said. If you feel differently, then that is your choice. But for now, I just needed to say this." He said, and then I was shrugging, and I decided to not even bother with this discussion anymore.

"Thanks for talking for a bit. I guess that sometimes I just need to fucking think." I said, and then I shrugged, not sure what in the world I was even going to say now. I was out of thought, and I was wanting to finally be behind this all now.

Once I was done, I was heading straight home, and once I was there, I saw Bebe immediately driving to my house. I wondered what she was doing, especially given the fact that I barely got home, and I wondered if she seriously remembered that. I saw that she was clearly bothered by something though, so I decided to exert some patience. "Hey Bebe, what's up?"

"I just got fired today." Bebe said, and then I sighed, knowing that I needed to just give her some fucking time. "I mean, I never liked the job much, but I needed this job for Robbie Dan and his college funds." Bebe said, and then then I hugged her, as she dropped her hat, and I felt like nothing I would say would make her feel better.

"Let me take you out for a bit." I said, and then Bebe had me go to Joyful Burger, since in her words, she just needed comfort food. Once there, I was taking a deep breath, and felt like I just needed to be patient with her, while she explained. "What even happened anyways?" I asked, feeling the need to start there.

"Well, throughout the early parts of the school year, to help with Robbie Dan getting ready to go on the bus, and to prepare for myself more, I had been showing up five or six minutes late a few times. And then my most recent delivery was four minutes late due to traffic. My boss explained to me that it was one thing to be late to my shifts, since I did warn him about that at least, but deliveries being late was something else entirely, and fired me on the spot before I could even speak." She said, and then sighed. "I took one of their premade pizza's, and placed a ten on the counter, and left before he would even respond." As she said that last part, she grew a smile on her face.

"Well, to be honest, you probably need to be focusing on your final grades more than anything else. I mean, I think Robbie would appreciate the fact that you were fucking trying to help him out. But I think he would rather have you work on school." I said, and I was looking at her, wondering if she was going to be upset with the way that I had said that.

"Yeah, but I mean, what about my college moving? I mean, I won't have any money for when I decide to fucking leave." After she was telling me this, I sighed, and I wasn't sure what in the world I would tell her. I was feeling like nothing I would say would change her opinion.

"It's okay Bebe. I am not upset with you. I know you are just doing the best that you can. And if for nothing else, I think you have a fucking resume to go off of now. People will appreciate that." I said, and then I smiled at this, hoping she would be happy with my sentiment.

"I know you wouldn't be upset with me. But my parents might be sad over the fact that I got fired over my first fucking job, and they might be judging me over this." Bebe was telling me, and then I shrugged as she was telling me this, and I wasn't sure what to tell her.

"Well, don't fucking worry about what your parents think. They are such fucking preps if that is the case." I said, and then I smiled as I was telling her this. She still seemed like she wasn't too sure what in the world she was wanting to believe right now.

"That is rather hard when you still haven't even graduated high school, like me. They are still probably thinking that I made some really fucking big mistakes." After she was telling me this, I sighed, and I knew that nothing I would say would get her to fucking think otherwise at all. So I wasn't even going to bother.

"Okay. You said what you needed." After I told Bebe this, I shrugged, and I was really not sure what in the world I was even going to be doing. "Bebe, just make sure you are doing the best you can every day. That is all that matters." I saw her looking like she was really trying to feel better about everything, but couldn't fucking do it yet.

When I was home that day, I gave myself barely any time to just grab my fucking snack, and then sat down. And tired as fuck, but needing to continue my work, I started with my speech. "Hello everybody. Sorry for taking so long. The goal will be 2500 tonight. If we hit it, tomorrow will be 3000, if not, then 2000." I said, and then went to work, and by the time it hit midnight, it was at 1100. So not enough to meet the extra hour, but it was an extra 11 dollars, and to be honest, I needed the hour extra of sleep.

Less than ten minutes after I started to get ready for bed, I was getting a text from Benjamin. I was kind of pissed at this one, to be honest. When I checked it though, I instantly felt kind of bad for feeling that way. "I watched that dvd. You need to come down, right now."

I got out of the car, not even pretending to hide the fact that I was a bit impatient with this whole thing right now, as I was starting to think about what was happening. "What did you fucking find down there?" I asked, feeling like I just needed to at least get something here.

Once I was at the gas station, I got out of the car, and to be honest, I don't even fucking think I was hiding my annoyance this time. When I was looking at Benjamin, I was feeling like he needed to give me something good here. "What were you wanting to fucking show me?" I asked, not really in the mood for any pleasantries.

Benjamin was pulling his laptop out, and I was sitting down next to it, and as he pressed the play button, he purposely angled his computer in a way where the camera wouldn't see it. Then the dvd was showing the most recent girl who went missing, Wendee, being sent away to a truck, after we saw a business conversation between the major, the president of Lazarus, and what looked like possibly even the video store guy working there. My mouth dropped, unsure what to say now.

"Do you think the police would want to fucking see this?" Benjamin asked me, and I looked at him, and I was shaking my head. In all honesty, I felt like if they did, they would probably tell me to stop fucking wasting their time here.

"I think that if any of the stories about my father are true, then the police will already be in on this. I think the best bet is to possibly upload this onto youtube or something, on a crazy IP or something." I said, and then I looked at him, and I saw that Benjamin was clearly thinking about my proposal.

"Fuck it. Might as well try." He said, and then he patted me on the shoulder, feeling like that was his death sentence. I sighed, and I hated myself for even suggesting something like this to begin with.