The party makes their way towards the exit of the Great Fleshy Candy Land, eager to finally get a change of scenery. However, just before they can continue north, they find their path blocked by Bratty A., Blue Teeth White Demon, Half-Face, Snakeshit, God Emperor Middleton, Smith the Omnijudge, Yoyoman, Blind Joy, the Mask of Impurity, the Great Distortion, Croh'gna, and Jennosyde, now together as a team known as the Cuyahoga Cataclysm. The Cataclysm begins to sing out in a harmony of voices as they stand before the party.
"All the rivers run…dancing in the sun…cradled in their watershed…all the rivers run RED."
As the Cataclysm finishes the chant, the ground trembles, and from it rises a gargantuan mechanical behemoth labeled as "ERIE". The members of the Cataclysm all jump into their own respective cockpits on the robot, as they prepare to take on the entire party at once.
"How pitiful." Greejis scoffs, stepping forwards. "Twelve of you can barely match one of me!"
Greejis uses his hammer to propel himself into the air, aiming for what he views as the strongest of the Cataclysm's modules, being God Emperor Middleton's. This module seems to be connected to the main machine by massive muscle fibers, and it sports two large beefy arms at its sides. Greejis takes hold of one of the arms and begins wrestling with it, laughing heartily as Middleton attempts to shake him off.
"He's got the right idea. If we all focus on the same one, we'll be open to attacks from the others. We need to keep their attention divided." Tora declares. Tora raises her arm, sending Viola and Jumbo out of the ground. The two worms slither up the legs of the robot, and Viola begins attacking Bratty A.'s module, which is equipped with speakers and a large artificial tongue. Jumbo spews cursed fire against the exterior of Snakeshit's module, which doesn't have any visible weapons attached to it. Sean also rushes forwards, latching on to Jennosyde's module, which is shaped like a six-pointed star. Sean begins slamming his fists on the surface of the module mercilessly, hoping to smash it open.
Li'l Bleedy finds itself trapped in the beams of the paralyzing spotlights cast by the Great Distortion's camera-like module, and is unable to move as the lights begin to draw it in closer to the module. Levus closes his eyes and focuses, calling forth dark fire and casting fireballs towards Croh'gna's module, which is composed of writhing tentacles. Blingle ninja runs up the side of ERIE's leg and embeds her Neon Blade into Blue Teeth White Demon's egg-shaped module, which is equipped with a series of scythes and shotguns. Knight Nikku waits until Yoyoman's module drops down from one of ERIE's hands, grabbing on to it before it rises back up, careful to avoid the spinning saw blades lining its edges.
"Oh, what the heck? How are we supposed to get up to all the other ones?!" Skeletone whines, observing that the remaining modules are all higher up on ERIE's body. Melvin wordlessly answers Skeletone by picking him up and hurling him straight onto Half-Face's two-tone module, leaving Skeletone clinging on for dear unlife. Melvin himself uses the gum stick he got from CVS to pole vault up to Blind Joy's module, which has a large grin across its otherwise pitch black surface.
While trying to figure out a way up, Shugi is nearly burned to a crisp by a fireball blasted by the Mask of Impurity's module.
"Zoinks!" Shugi gasps in shock, quaking in place. After a few seconds, the adrenaline sets in, allowing for Shugi to leap to great heights, jumping off of several modules in order to reach the top of the robot, where the Mask of Impurity's module is situated. Last and probably also least, Egg drifts down from above, landing on top of Smith the Omnijudge's module, which is also on top of ERIE.
Snakeshit's module responds to Jumbo's assault by bathing itself in holy light, completely deflecting the fire off of its surface and blasting a hole straight through Jumbo, severing the worm in two. Snakeshit's victory is short-lived, though, as Tora's Vein Burster breaches through the cockpit, and Tora herself slices a hole open, glaring at Snakeshit directly. Snakeshit grins wildly as he continues operating his module's controls, hardly phased by Tora's presence. The halo on top of his module gathers concentrated holy light, and fires it in a beam at Tora, causing her to drop her sword all the way to the ground below as she dodges the attack. Tora tries to grab Snakeshit, but he's too slippery and fast for her, and he keeps avoiding every approach she attempts.
Greejis cackles triumphantly as he rips off one of the arms from Middleton's module, but the other arm grabs him around the waist, and the muscle fibers connecting the module to the body begin pulsing and flashing as Middleton pumps power into the remaining arm. Greejis tries to break free from the arm's grasp, but its grip keeps tightening, showing no signs of loosening up. Greejis grunts as cracks begin to appear in his Balance Breaker armor, finding himself completely powerless to fight back against the strength of the machine.
Knight Nikku holds on tightly to Yoyoman's module as it swings around wildly in an attempt to saw through the assailants across ERIE's legs. Knight Nikku uses his weight to swing the module away from Blingle as it passes by, causing it to smash directly into Blue Teeth White Demon's module, snapping two of the module's scythes clean off in the process. Blingle discharges the stasis energy of the Neon Blade into Blue Teeth White Demon's module, causing its controls to lock up and begin malfunctioning, resulting in Yoyoman's module taking a direct hit from one of the module's mounted shotguns. Angered, Blue Teeth White Demon slams a big red button on her control panel, causing her module to eject itself from ERIE's body and begin hovering in place, as well as revealing a large energy cannon on its back.
"Come to hell with me!" Blue Teeth White Demon snarls, slashing at Blingle with the module's remaining scythes in an attempt to make her let go. Blingle uses the Neon Blade to anchor herself in place, staying close to the surface of the module to avoid the swinging scythes.
Levus's assault on Croh'gna's module seems to be wholly ineffective, as the tentacle attaching the module to ERIE's main body makes it highly mobile and evasive. However, with each missed attack, Levus's understanding of the module grows, and after sending forth another volley of fireballs, Levus abruptly switches his attention to the base of the connecting tentacle, and fires a concentrated blast directly at it, burning through it and causing Croh'gna's module to fall to the ground.
"Ky'si f'loseh econara-kada'SA!" Croh'gna exclaims in surprise, but the module quickly recovers, using its many tentacles to stand up on the ground and begin rapidly writhing its way towards Levus.
Skeletone tries to no avail to pierce Half-Face's module's armor with his dagger, but the blade proves completely useless against the machine. Skeletone suddenly notices that the module's mounted cannons are aiming straight towards him, and yelps in fear, losing his grip and dropping to the ground as two antimatter orbs are blasted out of the cannons. As Skeletone falls to the ground and scatters into a pile of bones, the two orbs collide with one another, exploding and dealing massive damage to Half-Face's module.
"Oh no you don't, you're not getting away from me that easy! I'm only halfway done here!" Half-Face growls, detaching his module from ERIE and dropping to the ground to confront and finish off Skeletone.
Up on top of the robot, Shugi tries to use the Reaper Saw to cut through the mask of the Mask of Impurity's module, but a blast of heat from one of the module's vents knocks him off his feet, nearly sending him toppling to the ground. Smith's module turns to face Shugi, having easily shaken Egg off of itself already, and it points its accusatory fingers at Shugi, slamming two gavels against ERIE and charging itself with electricity. Shugi is zapped by the electrified fingers, but even as he's scorched, he holds his ground, not willing to go down so easily. Shugi holds up the Wacky Mirror Shield, causing Smith's pointing fingers to point towards his own module, overloading it and causing it to spin out of control. Shugi whirls around just in time to use the shield to deflect an incoming fireball, but the fireball disperses harmlessly against the Mask of Impurity's module.
As Li'l Bleedy is raised up in front of the Great Distortion's module, it shoots out a few missiles, but the paralyzing spotlights lock the missiles in place just like Li'l Bleedy, rendering this attack useless. A camera flash is emitted from the module, but due to its mechanical nature, Li'l Bleedy is completely unharmed, only being briefly blinded by the glare.
Bratty A. cranks up her speakers to max volume, forcing Viola to detach from the module. Bratty A. then uses her module's tongue to spray a barrage of spit lasers at the worm, but most of them miss, and the few that do hit don't do a whole lot of damage. Sean, meanwhile, has managed to hold on tight even as Jennosyde's module has begun spinning in place, and he expertly dodges every single throwing star that the module hurls at him. As he continues to bash the module in with his fists, Jennosyde grows impatient, and detaches her module from ERIE to gain greater mobility.
"ENOUGH SCREWING AROUND! TIME TO COMMIT JENNOSYDE!" Jennosyde screams, slamming her module into the ground Sean-first. After getting Sean to let go, Jennosyde starts spinning her module like a saw blade, and hurtles towards Melvin. Melvin quickly repositions himself to be on top of Blind Joy's module, hoping to make Jennosyde slam into it. Jennosyde, however, was ready for this, and veers up at the last second, avoiding the collision. Blind Joy's module deploys a smokescreen, lowering Melvin's visibility and leaving him far more vulnerable to a follow up attack.
As Knight Nikku continues to cling on to Yoyoman's module, he is suddenly battered repeatedly by drumsticks, making it even harder for him to maintain his grip on the constantly moving module. Knight Nikku sees Blue Teeth White Demon's module charging up its energy cannon, and lets go of Yoyoman's module just before the cannon fires, severing the cable connecting Yoyoman's module to ERIE.
"On my own now, huh? Guess it's time for an ENCORE!" Yoyoman says as his module drops onto the ground in front of Knight Nikku. Yoyoman begins to play his module's built-in drums constantly, creating a soundwave barrier that prevents Knight Nikku from grabbing on to the module again.
As Greejis's armor continues to crack apart, he begins to feel hopeless, as though he has finally met his match. Just as it seems like it's all over, though, a sudden surge of strength comes over Greejis. The spirit of the former owner of his pants grants him power unlike anything he's ever experienced. It's unreal, magnificent! Greejis roars with might as he pulls apart Middleton's module's fingers, before ripping the module clean off of the muscle fibers connecting it to ERIE.
"How dare you defy me! BOW to your GOD EMPEROR!" Middleton demands, but Greejis ignores him, and the moment he lands on the ground, Greejis hurls the module straight into the Great Distortion's module, knocking Li'l Bleedy free from the paralyzing spotlights and sending it to the ground, as well as breaking the Great Distortion's module off of ERIE.
"Ergh…If you don't like, favorite, and subscribe...You're gonna get it." the Great Distortion declares, as two compartments open on the module's sides, revealing two Nerf guns inside. Immediately, the module begins wildly moving all over the place, being nearly impossible to pinpoint at any given location. Meanwhile, Greejis chases down Middleton's module, and smashes the cockpit open with his hammer. Middleton gawks at him, appalled.
"No…this can't be…how could I lose to such weaklings?!" Middleton scoffs, but Greejis just laughs.
"Simple. You couldn't." Greejis states, before bringing down the hammer once again, smashing the entire module with Middleton inside. As the thrill of combat wears off, Howler's pants return to a calmer state, and Greejis decides that he now knows that he has not reached peak performance. Without saying a word to the rest of the party, Greejis abandons the pants, leaving them on the ground as he heads off to the mountains to continue his training.
Shugi suddenly gets an idea, and uses a bunch of miscellaneous objects from his expansive inventory to block off the heat vents on the Mask of Impurity's module. Sure enough, the module begins glowing with heat, until it ultimately explodes off of ERIE's body.
"Burn, burn, BURN!" the Mask of Impurity yells from within the module, spinning it around to get rid of the items, every one of which Shugi expertly catches and puts back into his fanny packs.
"Like, there's this new spell I figured out, and I've been saving it for a time just like this! BLACKEST HOLE!" Shugi uses his Sugar Wand to cast forth a dark ball of magic, before running to the far edge of the robot to get away from it. After a few seconds, the magic ball implodes, creating a localized gravitational singularity that begins aggressively pulling in all of the modules that are currently freely floating high in the air. The Mask of Impurity, the Great Distortion, Jennosyde, and Blue Teeth White Demon all fumble with their controls to try and fight the pull, but it's too strong for them. Blingle realizes what's going on, and quickly jumps to safety as the four modules collide together and begin to be crushed by the gravitational force.
"The flames…they beckon…" Blue Teeth White Demon gasps, letting go of the controls and accepting defeat.
"It is…TOO hot." The Mask of Impurity admits, as the steely visage which seemed indestructible begins to crumple like paper.
"Oy, vey." Jennosyde groans, shaking her head in disappointment.
"Account terminated…" mutters the Great Distortion, as all four modules are sucked into the singularity and destroyed along with their inhabitants.
Down on ground level, Skeletone has opted to hide under some rocks, feeling as though he doesn't have the proper means to contribute in this fight. Levus is able to hold off Croh'gna's module with his fire, but the tentacles he destroys just regrow instantly, and he himself is beginning to grow fatigued. Yoyoman's module is rolling after Knight Nikku, trying to run him down, but before it can reach Knight Nikku, the module is ensnared by Li'l Bleedy through use of You Diemond, which manages to pierce the soundwave barrier and hold the module in place. Li'l Bleedy uses You Diemond to fling Yoyoman's module directly towards Bratty A.'s module, forcing Bratty A. to detach herself from ERIE, using her module's tongue as a propeller to fly.
"That's it! This ends NOW!" Bratty A. whines, cranking up the volume on her annoying music even more. Before Bratty A. can do anything else, though, a blast of holy light from Snakeshit's module obliterates her and her module.
"Oh, you JERK!" Bratty A. manages to whine before being completely disintegrated. Li'l Bleedy begins to swing Yoyoman's module towards Croh'gna's module, but before it can finish the maneuver, Half-Face's module blasts it with an antimatter cannon, obliterating Li'l Bleedy in a single shot and scattering the contents of its inventory all across the ground. However, Yoyoman's module is still sent onto the ground, and due to landing on its side instead of its wheels, it is unable to right itself, leaving it completely open to be finished off by Knight Nikku, who jumps on it and stabs his sword straight through it, impaling Yoyoman in the process.
"Ah, shizzle…you got me good, yo." Yoyoman gasps weakly, before hitting his module's self-destruct button, sending Knight Nikku flying with the ensuing explosion. After seeing this, Tora starts hitting random buttons on Snakeshit's control panel, trying to activate a similar functionality. Instead, this causes Snakeshit's module to detach from ERIE, and Snakeshit chuckles, using the module's built-in drill to burrow into the ground and force Tora to let go.
Still blinded by the smokescreen, Melvin continues banging on the hull of Blind Joy's module. Shugi drops down from on top of ERIE, landing next to Melvin, and uses the Reaper Saw to cut an opening into the module, before casting a flashbang spell into the interior and shielding his eyes.
"Agh…the light…aha! I can SEE! It's all clear now…I can see…that you must DIE!" Blind Joy shouts after the flashbang goes off, detaching his module from ERIE's body. Melvin and Shugi grab on to avoid falling off as the module takes flight.
Skeletone peeks out from his hiding spot, and realizes that this fight is already over half over, and he's done basically nothing. Determined to make sure his allies don't have any reason to pick on him after this, Skeletone stands up, and holds up the ipod he took from Bratty A., blasting an obnoxious tune. Half-Face's module immediately turns to face him, and begins charging up its antimatter cannons, while Skeletone stares it down, not moving at all. One of Half-Face's cannons explodes as it backfires, but the other shoots out a projectile straight towards Skeletone. Skeletone leaps into action, taking a low stance as he runs towards the module, ducking under the incoming projectile. Before the cannon can charge up another shot, Skeletone brings up his dagger straight through the middle of the two halves of the module, where he deduces the construction must be the weakest. Sure enough, the focused slice is enough to cleave the entire module in two, along with Half-Face, whose expression is stuck in one of furious surprise.
"What, no witty last words? Alright, I'll do it for you. You're half the man you used to be!" Skeletone chuckles, high-fiving himself for his joke. Before Skeletone can brag to his peers, Snakeshit's module shoots out of the ground below him, coated entirely in holy light, to which Skeletone, as a form of undead, is incredibly susceptible. Skeletone screams out in pain as the light begins to enrapture him, but before he can be fully smited, Blingle fires a blood laser into the open cockpit of Snakeshit's module, blasting a hole straight through Snakeshit's chest.
"Ssso…thisss is it…" Snakeshit coughs, his eyes glazing over as he goes motionless. Shugi spots You Diemond on the ground below, and remembers seeing Li'l Bleedy use it to swing one module into another. Shugi jumps down to the ground and grabs the weapon, before swinging it towards Blind Joy's module, ensnaring it. Shugi slams Blind Joy's module into Croh'gna's module just as Croh'gna is preparing to spear through Levus with a tentacle. Croh'gna's module explodes into otherworldly viscera, and Croh'gna himself lies splayed out on the ground, clutching at the air.
"The prophecy has been fulfilled. Even I cannot fight fate." Croh'gna gasps, before disintegrating into dust. After this, it doesn't take Melvin very long to use a rod of sugary meat to push Blind Joy's self-destruct button, detonating the module with relative ease. With all but one of the Cuyahoga Cataclysm dealt with, the party members all turn their attention to Smith the Omnijudge's module, but before them or Smith can take any action, a series of gunshots ring out, and the module slumps forwards.
"Case…closed." Smith sputters, as he and his module explode, and the party looks over at Bullseye Woody, who is holding a smoking gun. Bullseye waves sheepishly and shrugs, not even cracking a smile. The party doesn't get any time to rejoice, though, as a large hatch on ERIE opens up, revealing its ultimate weapon, the cataclysm laser. The party can do nothing but watch as the laser charges up faster than they can retaliate, but just before ERIE can unleash the attack, GD Travis rockets directly into the weapon and stabs his sword into it, disabling it and activating ERIE's self-destruct mechanism. ERIE explodes, leaving behind a wide variety of loot for the party to take. Shugi gathers up everything left behind by Li'l Bleedy, and then examines the loot for anything of interest to him. He spots a spell tome for a spell called "Erie State of Mind", which he snatches up, along with the Mineral Monday Wand. He also sees the Blackest Hellfire Scythe, which he promptly combines with his Blood Scythe to create the B'loodiest Hellscythe. He then spots a Tentacle Whip, which he combines with You Diemond to create You D'iemond, an even more incomprehensible weapon. From nearby, Howler's pants suck up the legendary Artifact known as the Yoyo-Yeye, along with a power suit made entirely of sloppy joe meat and an energy focuser to allow for concentrated channeling of energy. Melvin picks up the Cuyahoga Cleanser, a powerful healing ray, as well as the Long Arm of The Law, a weapon which functions similarly to Smith the Omnijudge's accusatory attacks. Melvin also grabs a really long rod of metal, as well as the Impure Mask, before gathering some money and heading to the antique shop to see if there's anything left there that he wants to purchase. Bullseye picks up a Double-Barrel Antimatter Cannon, a Snapshotgun, and the Great Lake Gatling Gun, staring sadly at the weapons before putting them into his inventory. Knight Nikku decides that this is where he will part ways, and he leaves behind some items that he doesn't view as personally useful. Among these are the Blackglasses, which Tora combines with the Whiteglasses that were dropped by ERIE as well as the Soul-Seeker Goggles in order to create the Two-Tone Soulsights. She also grabs some Blue Phoenix Wings, and, most notably, a bottomless bag of krill. Levus steps forwards and takes the massive pile of gold dropped by the robot for himself. GD Travis takes some throwing stars as payment for his services and heads off, waving at the group as he leaves. Blingle looks over the loot, but decides that she doesn't particularly care about anything left in it. Once everyone else has taken what they want, Skeletone finally gets his turn, but all that's left in the loot pile are some bluetooth speakers and a disk containing the song "All the Rivers Run". Skeletone sighs, but accepts the loot, since he IS a bard.
With all their obstacles out of the way, the party is finally ready to move on with their quest, and to leave the Great Fleshy Candy Land. However, just as they are about to move forwards, a large metal cage falls down on top of them, trapping them in place.