Chapter 28: Atlantis
Warning, this chapter contains spoilers about Atlantis season 4
COLORADO SPRINGS - HOME OF COLONEL SAMANTHA CARTER
"Grace Janet O'Neill-Carter, I hope you are ready? Coming!" A crystalline burst of laughter answered her as he pivoted on his heels. A pair of blue tennis shoes protruded from behind the couch, yet he pretended not to have seen them and began to search the living room on the exact opposite side. "Is she hiding behind the curtains?" He lifted the trips and feigned surprise. "No! But where is she hiding?" He scanned the room. "Is she hiding behind the armchair? No! But where can my beloved daughter be?" He wondered aloud. Suddenly, the little girl left her hiding place and rushed towards him, arms outstretched. He caught her and lifted her above his head.
"Daddy, I'm here !" He covered her with kisses, imitating the sound of wild animals. The little girl burst out laughing, which filled his heart with happiness. He had never thought that he would ever have the chance to cherish a child again. The front door opened and closed. The little girl struggled to get him to put her down. "MOMMY!" He burst out laughing and followed the soon to be three year old tornado towards the first floor. Samantha lifted the little girl in her arms and let herself be covered in kisses.
"Grace, I thought we agreed. I'm the one who has to cover Mommy with kisses." Reminded her father as he hugged the two women in his life.
"Did you have a good day?" Samantha asked as she kicked off her shoes with an ankle kick that reflected a certain habit, leaning with one hand on her husband's chest.
"A walk in the park, crazy hide-and-seek games... ah and we also talked about signing a Tok'Ra/Jaffa treaty." She laughs.
"A busy day with Daddy I see." She commented as she put Grace back down on the floor. She kissed her husband passionately. Jack was about to answer when the phone in his office rang, "Saved by the bell. I'll take care of dinner, go play the General." She teased him by gently snapping her posterior before following Grace in the direction of the kitchen.
(...)
"The Pegasus Galaxy?" She was surprised. "Jack, for how long?" She asked as she adjusted the handset of her cell phone to her ear. She had just returned from a mission when the call had been made. Grace would be out of the daycare in just under five hours.
"By the time you and Bill are sure what happened to Atlantis and you restore the intergalactic bridge." She ran a hand through her hair. "I'll be here before you leave on your mission. I'll stay in Colorado Springs, take care of Grace." It was hard for her to consider dropping everything to go to the Pegasus Galaxy. Nevertheless, she knew what she owed to Elizabeth Weir's team. They had saved Jack during his diplomatic sojourn in the city of the Ancients. "Okay."
"I'll inform Landry immediately... Sam?"
"Yes?" She was already thinking about what she should take with her, working out instructions to pass on to the Apollo in preparation for their intervention.
"Beware of Ellis, you may be the same rank now but... He has his own way of looking at things." Samantha frowned, Jack looked... concerned.
"You don't like her very much, do you?" Which was pretty rare of him.
"Let's just say, he wasn't my first choice to command the Apollo." She knew that the IOA had supported Colonel Ellis' nomination, even going so far as to force his selection from among the candidates under consideration.
"Who was your first choice?" She asked, curious.
"You." She was speechless." The Ori threat is gone. Our daughter is going to kindergarten in the fall. The trip to Atlantis is down to thirty minutes thanks to the intergalactic bridge. The Apollo's trips would have been fewer than the Daedalus'... And I'm considering retirement." She remained silent for a few seconds, time to digest the news.
"Jack, we've already discussed..." She had objected several times since their marriage to him leaving his position.
"And we'll do it again soon... Sam, I have to inform Landry. I have to hang up if I want to be there when Grace gets out of daycare."
(...)
"There you are." She had looked for him in the officers' quarters and the command room, without success. It was Rodney who had told her where she could find him.
"Two moons!" John commented as he turned to her.
"Actually, there are five. It's just these are the only two visible to the naked eye." She taught him, reciting almost word for word the lesson Mckay had given her earlier.
"Really?"
"Yeah." She confirmed.
"Huh. I heard you and Rodney got us reconnected to the intergalactic bridge." Sam opined to confirm the news. A great sadness emanated from John and having lost companions in battle, Samantha could understand what he was feeling.
"General Landry was understandably relieved to hear from us." She told him.
"You know, in all the excitement, I never got a chance to congratulate you." He swiveled slightly and pointed with a vague gesture to her belly. Sam gasped in surprise. How had he known? If they weren't really hiding, their marriage and Grace's birth were informations that very few people at the SGC knew.
"Your promotion. You're a Colonel now." John indicated to her, pointing to the stripes at her shoulders. She almost sighed, like a lioness, she tended to overprotect her family.
"Oh. Thank you."
"So, you sticking around?" Sheppard asked him.
"No. General Landry wants Doctor Lee and I to 'gate back, give him a full briefing on the situation here. The Apollo 's going to remain in orbit for the time being in case you need any assistance." And although the idea of staying a little longer to discover all the wonders of the city of the Ancients, Sam had been relieved when the contact with the SGC had been established. She could not wait to get home to her daughter and husband.
(...)
"MOMMY!" The little girl threw herself off the last three steps of the staircase, Sam caught her in the air. This gesture was the result of a long habit. The little body nestled in her arms, Sam buried her face in the little girl's neck, breathing in her baby smell. She had missed her so much.
"Good night baby." She kissed the little girl on the cheek. "How come you're not in bed, young lady?" Questioned the military as she hugged her, mentally thanking Jack for keeping the little girl awake until she got home. Grace began to tell her, in sentences that were still a little shaky, about her week spent with her father. "Where's Daddy?" Sam then asked. Two arms grabbed her by the waist and approached her with a muscular chest. He placed a kiss on her neck. "Ah so that was the plan, you distract mommy while daddy attacks... Traitress." Joked Samantha while depositing a billion kisses on the face of her daughter. She let herself go in Jack's arms, savoring the sensation of their two bodies against his.
"Welcome home."
WASHINGTON D.C. - HOMELAND SECURITY - OFFICE OF GENERAL JACK O'NEILL
"You are the perfect candidate for this mission. A military and a scientist, enough to keep the Air Force and the IOA happy." This discussion had been going on for several hours. They were facing each other, camped out on either side of Jack's desk. He didn't want to force her to agree to anything, but he knew that this was a perfect opportunity for her. Jack knew that if it had been just him...she could have taken that opportunity. But ... there was Grace and there was nothing harder for a mother than leaving her child behind. Nevertheless, Jack had not informed her of this, but the IOA had made their decision and it was up to him to convince Sam that this could work, it was up to him to convince her to leave them.
"I can't accept Jack. This is a year-long mission at least." She exclaimed.
"Sam ... This is a career opportunity. An opportunity you wouldn't have turned down before. An opportunity that would open every door for you, including the SGC or this office, one day." He argued.
"Before Jack, that's exactly right, BEFORE. But there's Grace now. I can't leave our daughter, I can't leave you." Jack ran a nervous hand through his hair, ruffling his graying locks even more.
"Our marriage wasn't supposed to be an obstacle to your career, we agreed on that." He reminded her. "You were the one who convinced me to keep my job and my rank. Because you knew that we could have the happiness of our family life and that we could also protect the Earth, each in our own place. We were always honest with each other. If you only listened to your instincts... Without taking us into consideration, where would you choose to go? Where would we need you most?" He questioned her. "You know that SG1, that this galaxy, can do without Samantha Carter for the time being. Pegasus needs you, after the loss of Elizabeth. They'll need a military who can counter Ellis and a scientist, who can stand up to Mckay. You know as well as I do, if it wasn't for our family, you'd be there already." He reached over the desk and grasped her hand. "Atlantis is less than half an hour's travel through the gate thanks to the Intergalactic Bridge. You'd only be an hour from Grace, an hour from us. There will be furloughs, meetings on Earth. We'd reverse the roles, I'd take care of Grace full time... You'd be protecting another Galaxy. It could work, Honey." He intertwined their fingers. "I saw the look on your face when you returned from the Pegasus Galaxy, this is the challenge of a lifetime. I can handle what will happen here. Samantha ... they need you there." She looked at him, aware that little by little he was managing to convince her. "Grace will come live here, with me. And we'll come home as soon as you're back on Earth. She is going to kindergartenin in a few weeks... Sam, we can do this. Give yourself a chance, I love you, I don't want you to ever look back and have any regrets."
"I don't know if I could handle it Jack."
"Sam you'll only ever be one Intergalactic call away from us." He pressed his hand tenderly into hers. "We've been through worse... we'll be fine."
(...)
(Stargate Atlantis 04x03)
COLORADO SPRINGS - SGC - CONTROL ROOM
Sheppard is at one of the stations, talking on a video link. Carter is on the other end, talking from the SGC control room.
"The, uh, Wraith-Replicator war is in full swing. From what I hear, the Replicators are kicking some serious ass in their last offensive." John informed her as he continued his situation report.
"Well, that's good news, John. Well done." Samantha congratulated him over the intercom.
"Hey!" Rodney had just popped up behind John on the screen. Sam wondered how he had reacted to the announcement that she had been appointed to Dr. Weir's position.
"I'll, uh, have the reports ready for you."
"Sam. Uh, what's new?" Questioned the scientist
"Just making preparations for the change in command here..." John explained. John was obviously pleased to see Sam take the lead of the expedition. Sam sensed that there was some tension between her and Colonel Ellis. The colonel had also been considered for the position.
"You don't have to tell me, I already know." Rodney cut him off.
"Reallt?" Samantgha wondered. She knew that the military officers had been made aware of her appointment, but not the science team.
"I just want to say that I think the IOA could not have made a better choice." She was surprised at his reaction, the Rodney Mckay she had known at the SGC would have been sulky about not being chosen.
"Thanks, Rodney." Samantha thanked him.
"No, no, no, no, no. You are too kind...what?" Carter just stares back with an expectant smile. "Uh... "Thank you, Rodney." No, no, no...wait a minute, you mean the... " She almost laughed when she saw Rodney break down on the screen. Obviously, the scientist already saw himself as the head of the Base.
"Yeah. She's our new boss." John pressed the point.
"I think the IOA saw me as the compromise choice since I am both a military and a scientist... The fact that I was highly recommended by General O'Neill and Richard Woolsey must have worked in my favor. I have to admit that I was a little hesitant to accept at first. You know, I had to take some things into consideration..." She admitted half-heartedly. She was reluctant to discuss her personal life with her subordinates. Nevertheless she had to inform John of her personal situation. She had been very clear with the IOA and with Jack, she was a mother.
"It had nothing to do with..." Once again, Rodney was making it all about him. She read the exasperation in John's eyes and was amused. Nevertheless, she quickly put the scientist in his place.
"No Rodney, this has nothing to do with you. I was concerned that I would still be needed here. But, General Landry agreed to keep me informed of what would happen at the SGC." It was a half-truth, aimed at Mckay. She saw in John's nod that he had caught what his superior was talking about. She would only leave with the assurance that if there was any trouble with her family, she would be kept informed. "Finally, I started thinking about what to expect in Atlantis and I made my decision." Sam finished.
"Ah well, in that case, your decision to accept the job has everything to do with..." Mckay blustered, but Sam immediately cut him off before he could sink any further.
"No Rodney, it has nothing to do with you. Again." She was going to have to learn the patience to work side by side with Rodney Mckay.
"It'll be nice to work with you again...just like old times."
"Only this time, you'll be under my command." Samantha couldn't help but throw a little pique at him, to make him understand that they were no longer on an equal footing. She was going to have to learn to establish her authority smoothly. For the first time, she had to ensure the security of an entire base. "I'll be there as soon as I can, I still have a few things to take care of at the base." A few things that all had to do with a heartbreaking farewell with her husband and her little girl.
"We look forward to seeing you Colonel."
"Thank you, I'll see you soon. SGC, out."
(...)
Carter is dressed in her Class A uniform, closing a case containing her green BDUs, which still bear her SG-1 patch. In the lab are several packed boxes. Teal'c stands at the entrance.
"On the day I left Chulak, Master Bra'tac said to me: 'Draw from your past, but do not let your past draw from you.'" She should have known that Jack would call Teal'c to come and console her and make sure she was okay. The farewell to Grace had been heartbreaking and she was increasingly doubtful of her decision.
"That's good advice. Still, I know I'm going to miss this place, and all of you." All of you, Teal'c nodded, he knew who that all included.
"I would have been offended had you felt otherwise." The Jaffa told her. She smiled, the first smile in hours.
"Ten years is a long time." She sighed, embracing her lab with her eyes. A lab that in a few minutes would no longer be hers.
"It has been ten years well spent. We have defeated numerous enemies and overcome many threats." he reminded her.
"It was never dull." She advanced, holding back tears. No, this decade spent with them had been the most incredible experience of her life. These ten years had given her a family.
"We have accomplished much here, but now it is Atlantis that is in need of you." She recognized Teal'c, quietly trying to assure her that she had made the right choice. Carter takes a deep breath, trying to regain control of her emotions. Tears fall freely down her face.
"Yeah...Part of me is looking forward to going, but..." The jaffa knew what was coming next. That was why he had come. As the Prima of Apophis, he had traveled to many worlds during his son's childhood, and perhaps his only regret was not seeing his son become a man. But Samantha was not going through the same ordeal, her assignment would not prevent her from being present for her family and he wanted to remind her of that. "You know, there's a part of me that thinks that maybe it's too soon, that I..." That Grace was too young, that Jack would have to face everything head on, without her support. " ... That I'm leaving my work here unfinished."
"Your work will continue, only in a different place." Teal'c reminded her, the Atlantis mission needed her in charge. "You have been bestowed an incredible honor, Colonel Carter, and I believe you should embrace it. And know this, though we may not be leaving with you, SG-1 will never be far away." The hint was subtle, but Sam understood what the prudish Jaffa was trying to tell her. They would all be there to support Jack and Grace, they would take care of her family.
"So I can expect you guys to come and visit sometime?" Sam sighed, tears threatening to spill from her eyes.
"Undomesticated equines could not keep me away." The reference to Jack and that mission with the Amazons made her laugh through her tears. She chuckles and hugs him.
"Nice call-back." Teal'c hugged her to him.
"Indeed."
"All right. Time to go." She said, wiping the tears from her cheeks, the jaffa took her briefcase and as they passed through the doors of the laboratory, away from the cameras of the SGC he whispered.
"Don't worry Samantha, we'll look after them."
(...)
"Colonel Carter, welcome to Atlantis."
"Thank you. It's nice to be here." She greeted Rodney and John. Then she turned to the various program officials who were waiting for her to arrive in the departure lounge. "Uh, I want you all to know how honored I am to accept this appointment. I've come here fully committed to this expedition, to Atlantis, and most importantly to each and every one of you. I look forward to working with all of you. Thank you."
"Nice speech."
"Thank you. I also do weddings and award shows. Book early to avoid disappointment.
(...)
She was beginning to unpack her belongings that had arrived a little earlier. Her possessions were basic, a few regulation canteens in which she had gathered souvenirs and personal items. A photo of Jack protruded from one of the boxes, covering the frame that housed the last family portrait of SG1 which also featured Grace. She tried not to think too much about the heartbreaking goodbye that had taken place in their Colorado Springs home. Grace was still so young, even though she adored her father, seeing her mom leave, without really understanding when she would return, had brought on a crying fit that only Jack's arms had been able to soothe. She had left the house with that last image tearing at her heart, Grace crying in Jack's arms as he tried to calm her down. Of course, Jack had almost immediately tried to reassure her by text message, but she wished that the last minute spent with them before some time wasn't so difficult. She had felt like turning back but... She had accepted this mission and as Teal'c had told her at the beginning, it was a great honor. She was eager to get to work, to keep her mind occupied. But first she wanted to set up her personal space, it would be essential for her to feel at home, surrounded by the pictures of her family. She was about to take some things out of a box when Mckay appeared. He had flowers in his hand. After telling him where to put them, she moved on to less sensitive items. The regulation leather jacket that Jack had given her before she left, on which he had sewn his stripes and the mission patches.
"Anyway, look I just, uh, I just came by to, uh, welcome you to Atlantis, see how you're settling in and, uh, you know, if you needed anything, and, uh, did I mention I was seeing someone?" That was all that was needed. She had a moment of surprise.
"I'm sorry, what?" He couldn't be serious?
"I'm, uh, seeing someone. Yes, I-I only bring it up now because you're here now, and we'll be working together a lot more, and uh, you know, I just thought with our past..." Who else but Rodney Mckay could ignore that Samantha Carter was no longer an available woman.
"Our past?" Jack would have found the situation hilarious. He had been teasing her for years with Rodney Mckay. All the while knowing full well that the scientist had never done anything but get on his subordinate's nerves.
"Well, you know, the unrequited lust that's been hanging over our heads for what seems like forever." What if... he had dared. She closed her eyes... It was like a band-aid, just rip it off at once. She had to tell him about Jack.
"Rodney ..." A misunderstanding. He would never compete with Jack O'Neill and he needed to hear that.
"I just don't want things to be awkward between the two of us, you know? Uh...kind of like they are now."
"Rodney...I'm sure we'll be fine." She replied through clenched teeth. She had suspected Mckay would be a problem, but this much...awkward? Not for a second.
"Oh, of course. I mean, I'll be fine. I'm just...with you...". She was about to reply sharply when she was saved by the arrival of a tall man with a grumpy face.
"I hear you're in charge." Hallelujah!
(...)
(Stargate Atlantis 04x04)
ATLANTIS CITY - COLONEL SAMANTHA CARTER'S OFFICE
"How was your first week in charge ?" He asked, smiling fondly at his wife through the communications interface. She was standing in her new office, he could see behind her pictures of the team, of him and her, but none of Grace. As always, she was protecting what was most dear to her as commander.
"Eventful week. You read the mission reports, I assume?" He nodded.
"But, that's not what I'm asking you. How did YOU experience your first week in charge ?" He repeated softly. He had just had a bunch of photos and videos taken of Grace during that week transferred to her through the interface.
"I had imagined the pressure you must be under as head of the SGC and HLS but... I was way off." She sighed and massaged the back of her neck to ease the tension. He smiled. His humor, certain gestures had finally rubbed off on Samantha and it was always a surprise to find out. "A team trapped by the Wraith, a dead civilian, a base contaminated with deadly nightmares caused by an alien entity..."
"It brings back memories..." He commented, thinking in particular of the crystal of P3X-562 or the entity that had taken possession of his wife. She nodded.
"Not all good unfortunately."
"You were the right one to lead this mission. Don't doubt it, Atlantis needs you." He smiled gently at her and they exchanged a look of tenderness. She hadn't realized how much she needed to hear him say that. "And with Mckay, how are things going? Do you want me to ship you some lemon?" He joked.
"Figure that Rodney is worried that I can't handle my desire to jump on him at the drop of a hat...now that we work on the same team." Jack's burst of laughter warmed his heart.
"Okay, you're getting a lemon ton on the next Apollo trip. Or ... I might indulge in a little evaluation visit from the new Commander of Atlantis." He joked. He lowered his voice. "I miss you, Carter."
"You too, General. You too."
(...)
(Stargate Atlantis 04x06)
ATLANTIS CITY - COLONEL SAMANTHA CARTER'S OFFICE
"Soon they won't even remember their own names." That was what Dr. Keller had said. The idea was terrifying. To forget everything. Forget Grace, Jack, SG1. Even her name, who she was. She felt a headache coming on, she shivered. She trusted Jennifer Keller and if she was right... She shuddered and pushed the idea of being sick away. It was just a headache, nothing more. Everything would be fine. She sat down at her desk and opened a locked drawer, a picture lay in there. She stroked Grace's face with her fingertips. She could never forget Grace. She was sure of it.
(...)
CITE D'ATLANTIS - INFIRMARY
"And you Sam, how are you?" The military straightened slightly in bed, dropping the tablet she was working on. She looked up at Dr. Keller.
"A little slimy, but that's okay, I'm catching up..."
"You should rest Sam." Jennifer argued with her. "But ...I have it on good authority that you never stop." Samantha smiled fleetingly, Jack had been treated by Dr. Keller during the Ori pandemic. She should have suspected that he had made some comments about her surroundings. "Are you ready to test your memory?" She asked her.
"Of course Doctor, I'm all yours." She answered her by putting her tablet flat on her lap. She smiled at the doctor.
"Can you tell me what year it is?" She answered correctly. "Can you tell me who this person is?" Keller displayed a picture of John on her tablet. She answered correctly. "And these?" On Keller's screen a picture of SG1 appeared, the one in her quarters with Grace in it.
"My family."
(...)
(Stargate Atlantis 04x08)
ATLANTIS CITY - COLONEL SAMANTHA CARTER'S OFFICE
John Sheppard lifted the ceramic pyramid decorating Samantha Carter's office. The new leader of Atlantis then returned to her office, he put the decorative object down.
"A gift from Daniel." She commented at his guilty look. She walked around the console and sat down at her desk. "It's been an intense day to say the least." Sam had seen things she had never considered possible. The vision Davos had shown her had challenged deeply held beliefs. She hadn't flinched despite Woolsey's unsettling presence, analyzing her every move and intervening to challenge her decisions. She had even reprimanded him harshly, asserting her authority as leader of this base in front of her men. But she had realized even more forcefully how difficult it was to be the one making the decisions and putting the risks and action on others. She had stood in front of an untethered Wraith to protect her from a puncture.
"Any news from the IOA?" Questioned her subordinate.
"No, but Woolsey implied that his report would be...less detailed than usual." John raised a puzzled eyebrow. "That was, I think, his way of saying 'nice job.'"
(...)
(Stargate Atlantis 04x11)
"I don't understand how you guys put up with..." The cold anger she had contained by the time Mckay left the office erupted. She stood a few inches away from Colonel Ellis. She understood now why Jack had warned her about Ellis. The man had one view of things and one view only. He only respected brute force, so she was going to demonstrate it.
"If you ever talk like that to someone under my command again, you will not be welcome on this base, Colonel. Is that clear?" She felt Sheppard's approving gaze on her. As a military officer and scientist, she had more than once demonstrated that the path of technology was sometimes preferable to an armed offensive. Nevertheless, while she agreed with Ellis on the importance of eliminating the Replicator ships. She trusted Mckay to develop this weapon. No one on her base would speak with such disdain to one of her subordinates.
"Yes, it is." Ellis replied. A spark of newfound respect shone in the depths of his eyes.
"Good. We're done here. Thank you."
(...)
(Stargate Atlantis 04x12)
ATLANTIS CITY - COLONEL SAMANTHA CARTER'S OFFICE
"She let me send her to the field while she's three months pregnant!" The hallways weren't exactly the ideal place to have this conversation. So Samantha had called him into her office to discuss it after the battle.
"John..." She began, interrupting the pacing her subordinate was doing in her office.
"Every time we go out into the field, we get beaten up, paralyzed. She should never have kept that information from us." Stormed the Colonel.
"John ... Why do you think Teyla didn't tell you?" She questioned him, trying to make him realize the situation for himself.
"Because she's unconscious!" He snarled.
"John! Teyla is pregnant, not sick!" Samantha replied as she stood up from her desk. "And she's an Athosian, her culture doesn't ostracize an expectant mother, on the contrary, they fight and keep working until labor begins." Samantha informed him, referring to what Teyla had taught her about her people.
"I am responsible for this team and she lied to me." This argument was valid.
"You are right John, you are responsible for this team. But it's Teyla's choice how she wants to handle this pregnancy. She is a valuable asset to your team and this base." She reminded him. "Besides, she's cut off from her people, we're her only family right now."
"Yes, but ..." Annoyed the military.
"It's your team and you experience her silence as a betrayal... Although you didn't ask for it, I'll take the liberty of giving you my opinion as your superior and friend." She added to soften her words. "I didn't leave active duty until I was six months pregnant. After that, I decided it was time for me to confine myself to lab work until I gave birth."
"And what did General O'Neill think?"
"He wasn't thrilled, but he understood. He's a military and seeing me walk through the gate went against everything he stands for: protecting and preserving life. When I got pregnant, we were looking for the Ark of Truth. I couldn't give up SG1, I couldn't forgive myself. Then, we eliminated the Ori threat and I continued to go on exploratory missions." She taught him. "There was less danger. Did you know that among the Jaffa, in some tribes, women fight and pass through the gate until they give birth? I understand your point of view John, you want to preserve Teyla but, try to consider her point of view. Do me this favor."
(...)
(Stargate Atlantis 04x08)
ATLANTIS CITY - COLONEL SAMANTHA CARTER NEIGHBORHOOD
"Pigeons?" Jack's hilarity was infectious. Samantha found herself laughing too. "He raises pigeons... Frankly, the man seriously rivals Dr. Lee in my personal record." Scoffed Jack, she smiled frankly.
"Jack, I should never have told you that... After all, it was Radek who saved the city." She decided to tease him in turn, as if to avenge the doctor. "You should have seen the look on his face when I took off my jacket... There were literally sparks."
"Excuse me?!" Jack took offense.
"He was electrocuted." She explained to him, putting an end to the torture of her husband.
"That'll teach him to undress my wife with his eyes." Then his gaze turned roguish. "I would have found a much more pleasant way to pass the time if I'd been stuck with you in an elevator. It's not just the jacket you would have taken off." She shook her head, amused at the virtual flirtation. "Have I told you how well that uniform fits you, Colonel."
"Jack..." She sighed. "Are you trying to seduce me?"
"I thought you already had?" He wondered. A sound of the front door sounded behind him. He pivoted. "Cassie?" He shouted.
"DADDY!" A tornado with blond curls pounced on the military, not having noticed that he was on a video conference. Samantha smiled, tenderized. A head emerged from behind the soldier, Cassandra.
"Hi! Good to see you, is the Daedalus on standby between galaxies?" Samantha nodded her head in agreement as Grace was already turning to "contemplate" her mom, putting her little hands on the screen, from what she guessed.
"Mommy!"
"Hi sweetie, so did you have fun at the park with Cassie?"
"Yes! That was good!" Saids the little girl, it was then that she noticed that one of her teeth was missing. Jack noted her questioning look.
"A little dog accident. Grace got a little too enthusiastic and the dog returned the favor." Cassandra informed her as she crouched down next to Jack to enjoy her mother for a bit.
"I love you Mommy." Grace spontaneously exclaimed. The Colonel had a tender smile.
"I love you too. I'm coming home soon to spend a weekend at home. I miss you all."
"Colonel Carter to the control room, please. Colonel Carter to the control room." She sighed.
"I'm sorry, I have to go. I love you guys. See you soon." She cut the call and activated the communicator she wore in her ear, which she had turned off at this late hour.
"Carter, go ahead."
(...)
(Stargate Atlantis 04x16)
M6V-801 - SOMEWHERE UNDERGROUND
"The thought of falling into the abyss at any moment drives me crazy. I need to keep my mind occupied." Jennifer confessed to Carter as they began to tie the rope
"Well staff evaluations are about to begin... So how are things going with your team." Samantha questioned her, thinking that this fairly neutral topic of conversation would be enough to take the young doctor's mind off things.
"They're great... They're all very smart. They all made me feel very welcome."
"Good, good." Samantha commented.
"What about me ... how am I doing? Are you satisfied with my work?" Keller seemed slightly stressed at the thought of hearing Samantha's answer.
"Oh yes, rest assured, you will get a very good evaluation report."
"That's good to hear."
"I'm sorry, it's my fault, I'm always thinking about work." She apologized when she saw that she had failed to distract the doctor from her dark thoughts. Jack had said it enough to her, she was unable to hang up from work. Hadn't she refused to go to Minnesota for nearly ten years. "...Are you seeing anyone?" Thinking about Jack had brought that question to the edge of Carter's lips. She sensed a ... a chemistry between Rodney and Jennifer, a "run away from me I'll follow you" thing. Was she wrong?
"Excuse me?"
"On base... Do you have someone?" Samantha clarified.
"I had ... a moment with ... a guy. But he's hard to decipher, so the easiest answer is no. How about you?" The return of the question caught her off guard.
"I'm in charge so I can't really..." She kicked the ball.
"Yes of course... And is there anyone waiting for you on Earth?" Samantha thought of Jack and Jennifer noticed. Probably a change of expression on her face.
"Ah ah! Tell me everything."
"It's complicated." Samantha admitted with a beaming smile. Complicated because they weren't supposed to flaunt their union until Jack retired. Complicated because they were separated by a galaxy or two. Complicated because she loved her mission here but felt guilty about leaving her daughter and Jack behind.
"Show me a relationship that isn't." Obviously Jennifer's romantic past was tumultuous.
"He's Washington, I'm here..." Samantha informed her.
"Long-distance relationship, einh."
"He's going to retire soon so who knows..." She never knew why she let that information slip.
"His retirement? So an older man."
"Not that old." She defended him. Jack was by far the most vigorous man she knew.
"An older man ... Washington ... is he a senator? Somebody you know? Do I know him?" Samantha smiled. Yes, but she suspected the doctor didn't remember them... him.
"Probably not."
(...)
"Well, here's a better game we can play. Brad Pitt or George Clooney? If you had to choose."
"Mmm...Clooney, I guess." Samantha thought of Jack and a slight smile grazed her lips. Surely he would have found a way to bring that preference back to him. The salt and pepper hair, the charisma, that sort of thing. Thinking about Jack brought her some comfort. Being stuck at the bottom of a hole after a dizzying fall, two dizzying falls she corrected herself, with Rodney Mckay was not in her list of the most pleasant situations.
"Pitt all the way. Okay, you go. Come on, it's easy. Any two guys I would know." Keller asked her with a smile. She doubted that Jennifer would find what she herself was enjoying exciting, but ... she lent herself to the game.
"Okay, okay. A...Brian Greene or Neil Degrasse Tyson?." The choice was obvious to her.
"Uh-huh." Jennifer obviously didn't know who she was talking about. A shot in the arm for popularizing science.
"They're physicists. They're on t.v. I picked ones you should know... "
"Uh...Brian Greene, I guess?" Samantha grimaced
"Pfft...Tyson, all the way."
(...)
"Are you and Katie still, um...?" Jennifer's interest in Mckay's relationship caught the Colonel's attention.
"Oh, uh...well, it-it's kind of messed up now." Samantha's eyebrows rose. Really? What had he done to scare the scientist away?
"Why, what happened?"
"Well, I was going to...propose. Uh-"
"You were?" Amazed Samantha, she who remembered very well this surreal conversation in her quarters when she arrived on the base.
"Yeah. I bought her a ring and everything. You know, was going to...ask her, and then the, uh, quarantine error happened."
"What does that have to do with anything?"
"Well, I don't particularly want to go into the details, but uh, you know, I just, I told her that I needed some time for me. Not, you know, it had nothing to do with her. I just-I just needed to figure some stuff out. And now she doesn't want to speak to me. She's filed for a transfer back to Earth... " It all made sense now... This man was boundlessly clumsy. Even with a woman who accepted his advances.
"You broke up with her. That's a break-up."
"No I didn't!"
"Yeah, you did." Samantha confirmed, remembering all the times Jack had pushed her away. All the times she had lived as a slap, a break. Including the last one that had almost been the point of implosion of any relationship between them.
"No, I-I said I needed the time for me."
"Yeah, code for 'I'm not that into you anymore.'"
"But I meant it!."
"It doesn't matter! You can't "almost" propose to someone and then take it back! That's a relationship killer."
(...)
Giving birth had been an unbelievable pain, but breaking a bone falling from an unstable structure of several feet high was a different kind of pain. As Jennifer removed her sock, Samantha thought of her daughter. Grace have had her first mani-pedi with her mother and her Aunt Vala. Samantha had let the little girl paint her toenails under the supervision of the alien beauty, during her last permission. A touch of femininity in a gloomy environment that seemed out of place. She grunted in pain. Mckay and Keller moved away from her and she took stock of her situation. She knew that the fracture could have caused a hemorrhage and that in an hour it would be critical. She could die, or lose her leg. They had to find a way out of here and fast.
"So, what? Hour before internal bleeding becomes a problem?"
"How did you... ? "
"It's not my first rodeo, Rodney."
"Here's some ibuprofen."
"Ibuprofen?! That's the strongest thing you've got?!" Mckay snapped. Which strangely warmed Samantha's heart a little. When Rodney lost control of his nerves, when stress mounted, when a deadly deadline arrived, he gave it his best shot.
"It's all I have in this basic kit. Although, from this point on, I think I'm making morphine mandatory...as well as maybe a grappling gun..."
"I wouldn't take the morphine." She remembered her last injury on the field. Cameron had had to inject her dose after dose of morphine so she wouldn't suffer unnecessarily. She had found it difficult to stay focused. She couldn't afford it this time. She wasn't alone anymore, there was Grace ... and Jack. "Got to keep a clear head. We still have to figure a way out of here. At least one of us does. Chances are pretty slim that I'm going to...climb out. Ow." She wins as Keller sets the leg.
(...)
"This thing leads straight out! It's a nice steady slope! C'mon, you guys gotta get down here!"
"You go."
"What? No way."
"There's no way I'm going to be able to lower myself."
"You won't have to ... I'll lower you."
"Rodney, your hands."
"Look, I'm not leaving you behind. Come on...I'll make you a seat."
(...)
Jack gently helped her settle her injured leg into the bed. He had been gnawing on his own for several weeks, ever since Command had been informed of Colonel Carter's injury. This had happened after Samantha's last permission on Earth. She had been unable, or unwilling, to leave her command in the hands of someone else while she returned to Earth for her recovery. This had been the source of the first conflict between them since her departure. He couldn't stand the idea of her being injured, far from her family. She had returned for a series of preparatory meetings, before the interviews required by the IOA of some members of the Atlantis mission.
"When you leave, you'll need to take this with you." He pointed to a package sitting by the closet door. She frowned, settling her leg on the cushion Jack had placed.
"What is it?" She asked.
"A gift for Mckay." He sighed through his teeth.
"A gift for Rodney!"
"Don't be so surprised, it's not a basket of lemons!" He hastened to add.
"But why?" She wondered.
"He didn't give up one of our own. Isn't that enough?" He replied softly as he leaned in to kiss her. "He saved one of the people I love most in the world. For that, he has my eternal gratitude."
"What did you buy him?"
"Gloves." He waved his fingers at her. "I couldn't give her a ring...the place is already taken." She burst into a mischievous laugh. She drew him to her for a passionate kiss.
"You're killing me, Carter..." He murmured against her lips. "If you didn't have that damn cast." She could feel the tension in his voice, the tension that made the most feminine part of her quiver with pleasure.
"How about you get a little creative... After all, you are very flexible for your age." She teased him as she pulled him over her.
(...)
(Stargate Atlantis 04x17)
ATLANTIS CITY - COLONEL SAMANTHA CARTER NEIGHBORHOOD
Communication with Midway was impossible. It was therefore impossible to continue the "routine" trips to Earth, not without spending about forty days away from Pegasus. Including a single day on Earth. They were cut off from all rapid communication with Earth except for pumping energy into the MPAs. They were dependent on the Daedalus or Apollo shuttles. What she feared most was happening. Being cut off from Earth and the people she loved.
(...)
(Stargate Atlantis 04x19)
ATLANTIS CITY - STASIS MODULE ROOM
She stood in the doorway before Carson was led into the room. Those stasis chambers brought back particularly painful memories. Zelenka worked at the control console. She closed her eyes for a second, pushing the image of Jack entering those chambers from her mind, she couldn't afford to be upset. This wasn't her saying goodbye to a friend. She took her seat across from John in the room. As Jennifer entered, pushing the patient into a wheelchair, she felt the emotion overcome her. She would refer her. She was the leader of this team, she had to support her men, not let her own memories win her over. When Carson spoke to her, Samantha was only sympathetic to him.
"Samantha, there's a letter in my quarters addressed to my mother. Don't worry. I was careful not to give everything away. Tell her you found it after you shipped my things. It's just some thoughts, things I should have said a long time ago."
"I'll make sure she gets it." She understood.
When Ronon embraced Beckett for a split second, Samantha experienced a flashback to identical moments with SG1. It was hard to stay still. Sheppard's team was reliving the loss of a friend.
"I want you all to know, that seeing you again, these last few days, it was all worth it. No matter what happens." She nodded and looked down at her hands knotted in front of her stomach. Masking her emotion. The tricky part was dealing with the emotion that nearly overwhelmed her when Rodney tried to play strong man. Tears welled up in her eyes as he pressed the stasis button. Jack's face was superimposed on Carson's. She knew what the team was going through. She had been there too. Probably one of the worst times of her life.
(...)
(Stargate Atlantis 04x20)
NEAR FUTURE - PEGASE GALAXY - EARTHSHIP PHOENIX
Explosions rock the bridge. Carter helps with repairs.
"We've got a hive ship, six o'clock!" As the Earth ship Phoenix emerged from hyperspace, it had come under enemy fire.
"It's an ambush." Samantha commented soberly. Michael had played them, it was probably one of his spies who had given them this information.
"Here comes another one. Dead ahead." Lieutenant Oswald informed her.
"Evasive maneuvers!" She ordered her. When Jack had retired from the military, Julia Oswald had asked to be sent to Atlantis, to serve under the wife of the man she had supported for three years. Samantha had made her second in command aboard the Phoenix. A ship she had renamed in her inner fort: the Grace.
"We're boxed in." Julia wasn't panicking. She was a highly trained pilot. She had only taken a desk job to continue raising her daughter when her spouse had been deployed. But her daughter was grown now and Julia wanted to fight the Wraith.
"Return fire!" Samantha ordered her, aware that their ship would be no match for three hive ships. An explosion on the bridge knocks the man in the port station out of his chair. He falls back with a pained cry. Another crew member hurries to take his place.
"We've lost Asgard weapons!" Panic did not break through in Julia's voice. The situation was starting to smell a bit like a bad smell.
"Switch to missiles. Fire all batteries." Sam ordered. She knew the human cannons would probably not be strong enough to take out the hives. She rushed forward as one of her men fell, following a Wraith shot. "Help him. Go."
"We've got an overload. It's the hyperdrive."
"Reroute the power."
"No response. System is going critical." She then took the only possible course of action. The crew had to abandon ship.
"I'm beaming you to the planet. Head to the 'gate as soon as you can." Samantha ordered.
"What about you?" The captain was always the last to leave the ship.
"I'll be right behind you!?"
She realized immediately that she would not be able to teleport safely. One system after another was failing, including the teleportation. She knew what she had to do. The engines were going critical. She was going to die on this ship. There was only one thing left to do. She programmed the navigation to crash into a hive ship, they were so close together... She could neutralize them all and save her crew. She stood upright beside the captain's seat. She contemplated the rapidly approaching ship before her. Her last thoughts were for Grace and for Jack. Forgive me, I love you.
(...)
(Stargate Atlantis 05x01)
PEGASUS GALAXY - ATLANTIS CITY - CORRIDOR NEAR THE INFIRMARY
Samantha and Rodney passed each other on the way to the infirmary. Samantha was returning from her quarters where she had her things in order. Rodney was on his way to see John and Teyla in the infirmary.
"Hey, what's with the bags?"
"What's with the flowers?"
"Going to see Teyla. Oh, you probably heard. I delivered her baby." She smiled. This was only the tenth time she'd heard about it after all. But she had to admit that Rodney had done a good job.
"I did! And they tell me she's going to name him Rodney!" She joked.
"Yes! Really?" Of course, only Rodney thought she wasn't kidding.
"No. Not really?" She hastened to tell him.
"Oh, that's funny. Where are you going?"
"Back to Earth." And it was not without apprehension that she was getting ready to go through the door. For it was not the Daedalus that would send her back to Earth. The IOA had requested her immediate return after reading Sam's last report. So she would go through the gate from Atlantis, using up power from their ZPM. Which made her fear the worst. Without direct news from Earth and Jack... She didn't know what to expect.
"What ? Why?" Rodney's astonishment warmed her heart. She knew that the liberties she had taken with military protocol were probably the reason for her emergency summons. She had taken control of the Daedalus, with Steven's approval, but... The damage to the Daedalus would be blamed on her.
"Oh, they caught the last Ba'al clone. The Tok'ra are going to extract the symbiote. They want SG-1 to put in an appearance." That was the main purpose of her return. The entire team would be reunited if Steven's information was accurate, including Jack.
"Okay...?"
"Plus, the IOA want to do an 'exhaustive'" As Jack, she mimed parentheses with her fingers... ""review" of my first year in command, so, you know...that can't be good."
"Are you crazy? They probably want to give you a medal. You had a great year. I know my opinion doesn't mean much to those folks, but, um...I think you've done an excellent job. I'm glad you took the post." Against all odds, Rodney seemed to have accepted this hierarchical and friendly relationship between them. The false sexual tension he felt seemed to have vanished. Leaving only a mutual respect and a friendly understanding.
"Thanks, Rodney, that means a lot. Tell Sheppard the court martial will have to wait." She also knew that her report, presenting the sending of the Colonel on a mission while he was seriously injured as her doing, would be detrimental to him. But, she would have done the same in John's place... She had already done so. You don't leave anyone behind, that had become her motto when she came into contact with Jack. She would take the blame for John, that was her role as leader of the expedition.
"Sure. See you soon."
"Hope so."
(...)
COLORADO SPRINGS - SGC - BOARDING ROOM
"Colonel Carter." She hadn't expected Richard Woolsey to be waiting for her directly at the gate. Truth be told... She had thought Jack or General Landry would be there, but neither of them were.
"Mister Woolsey, how are you?" She wanted to be comfortable, warm, confident.
"Very well, thank you for asking."
"So, is this whole "evaluation process" going to take very long? I mean, there's a lot of work to be done on Atlantis, and I'm kind of anxious to get back." she asked him almost immediately. Although she was happy to be back on Earth for a few days, she hoped that her leave would allow her to enjoy her family, before leaving again. She had been cut off from Jack and Grace for nearly three months. She was looking forward to being able to hold them close.
"I'm sure you are. However, the IOA has decided that perhaps someone with a different skill set would be more suited to lead the Atlantis expedition now." Woolsey's tone was cold and dry, efficient as usual.
"Excuse me?" She was in shock. Had he just told her that she was relieved of her command?
"I'm here to inform you that, effective immediately, you are being removed from command..." So she had understood what he was implying. The IOA was taking back control of Atlantis. She had been too effective, she had completed her mission. So the IOA was taking the opportunity to force a civilian, whom they could control, into command of Atlantis.
"Um...who-who's replacing me?" She needed confirmation. She could feel it. That was why he was here, in front of her. To establish his power over the city. Maybe he wanted to be the one to tell her, out of respect for what they had experienced together.
"As a matter of fact...I am." She knew it.
"I see."
(...)
COLORADO SPRINGS - SGC - GENERAL LANDRY'S OFFICE
She was pacing the office, phone pressed to her ear. She had taken off her Atlantis mission jacket, her tags visible, and her wedding ring and engagement ring around the chain. She had been back for barely half an hour. After the checkup in the infirmary, she had asked to be put in touch with Washington. Before being interviewed by the IOA.
"I couldn't do anything. I'm sorry. The IOA has control of the expedition. I tried hard to make them see reason but...". She could hear the frustration in his voice. She was outraged and his support was a balm.
"They can't replace me, Jack, not with Woolsey! Not now, I haven't completed my mission! I haven't even been able to talk to the members of the expedition." He had suffered from being cut off from her for several months, but he knew that she was thriving as head of the expedition, she could be both military and scientific, without having to choose. She had also enjoyed this human management of a base, appreciating the relaxation of the strict protocols of the military.
"I know... Now that Midway has been destroyed, they fear losing control over the city... And when your last report came in... Let's just say they questioned your decisions, arguing that you were letting your emotions endanger the expedition." He knew she wouldn't like that last detail. Nevertheless, he knew that this argument more than any other had worked against her. That he had argued that he would have done the same thing in Samantha's place had not changed anything.
"WHAT? If Woolsey had been in my shoes, he would have let Teyla, John, Ronon, Rodney and Lorne die. He's a bureaucrat, Jack, he quantifies human life and acts accordingly, deciding if the cost is worth it. If I hadn't ordered this rescue mission, we never would have gotten Michael's data or destroyed his cruiser, or saved our own!"
"Sam! Sam! SAM!" He managed to cut her off in her diatribe by raising his voice. "You don't need to convince me. If I were you, I would have done the same thing and you know it... But, I'm powerless, if my voice had any weight in your nomination, it was primarily because Woolsey supported my choice... You suspect he didn't have the same reaction at the IOA meeting." She heard him sigh and imagined him running his hand over the back of his neck. "I'm sorry... There's nothing I can do. I've tried... and failed. The only thing I can do is reassign you to SG1... I'm sorry. Really." She sighed, leaning her forehead against the bookcase. She was so angry, revolted by this injustice.
"I ... Thank you Jack." She knew she was being unfair to him for being so revolted by this decision. She had been gone for over a year on a mission. Leaving him on Earth with their daughter. But she knew he understood. He had had such a hard time leaving SG1... He would understand. She heard three knocks on the door and General Landry entered, signaling her that IOA was getting impatient. "I'm going to have to go, Jack. I hope I can get back in...". She questioned Landry with her eyes, she didn't know how long the SGC would quarantine her. The General held up several fingers. "Three days... Time for the change of command and the interview with the IOA."
(...)
COLORADO SPRINGS - SGC - COLONEL CARTER DISTRICT
"John, I'm sorry things are going this way. Nevertheless, I must tell you that serving with you on Atlantis has been an honor. I know that the arrival of Richard Woolsey as head of the program will be... a difficult transition. Nevertheless, I am counting on you and the team to continue to do your jobs with the thoroughness I know you have." She cut the recording, time to regain composure. The difficult part was coming. "I wish I could have told you all this in person, but... Command thinks that 40 days of travel for goodbyes seems unwarranted... Besides, you know that I have "things" keeping me here. Thanks for everything John, take care of Atlantis for me. Carter out."
She stopped the recording. And saved it in the file Woolsey would take back with him to the city. The Daedalus would bring her things back on its next trip. She sighed.
"Welcome home." She sighed, tears in her eyes. Only here could she admit to the pain of giving up her command. Only here could she allow herself to feel the sense of regression at the thought of resuming command of SG1. It was awful, she felt horrible to feel such a way. Nevertheless, she had tasted the sensation of leading something bigger and giving up broke something inside her.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: In writing Sam's passages on Atlantis, I have based myself on some of the episodes that aired. I also used the bonus material available on the season 4 DVD. I used the cut scenes and the documentary "A New Leader".