Chapter 10: Time
Three hours of silence…
Morgana awoke a captive, locked in a room, clueless as to why, and she was beginning to get impatient. At first, she was afraid, but time proved dull enough to replace her fear with restlessness. Her foot began a rhythmic tapping on the wooden floor as she fell back into her thoughts.
"Tap,tap,tap."
The most curious thing about her situation is the room she'd been observing since she woke up. First off, it was well decorated, too well decorated to be a commoner's room. Admittedly, Morgana has not seen many commoner's rooms in her life but from what Gwen's told her, definitely not.
Fully accommodated, a nightstand next to the bed. The same bed is adorned with a canopy that drapes beautifully blue silk sheets to the floor. Ornate pillows, a stained glass window, an embellished fireplace, and a large, golden-trimmed standing mirror.
This was definitely a noble's room and no doubt she was in a castle considering the stone walls and the view she'd witnessed only a minute ago as she peered out the window hoping for a possible escape. Morgana's hopes were dashed when she saw the view, the height of the castle rivaled even Camelot's. No amount of bedsheets would descend her safely.
Whomever had absconded with her, clearly wanted her comfortable… docile. Their affluent presentation resembled her room in Camelot. The resemblance only furthered her unease. The suggestion that her captors were intimate with her room, made her feel observed… perversely so.
So Morgana was left scrutinizing the room, soundly disturbed now. Looking for something to defend herself with, and yet again her hopes were dashed. Anything pointy seemed to be taken, Her captors even took the pokers from the fireplace. So Morgana would just have to wait…
…
"Knock, Knock."
Morgana jumped. The first sound she'd heard in hours save the wind, she was startled, and rightly so. Still, her pride quickly overcame her fear and she composed herself.
I won't give them the satisfaction. At least she hoped she wouldn't.
"Creaaaak" The door opened slowly.
Morgana sat one leg over the other. Ready to defy whatever demand her abductor would levy. But really it was to stop her mad tapping on the floor. There was no helping it, she was nervous.
Out from behind the door a young blonde woman emerged. Morgana took in the sight, surprised that it was not only a woman but a woman her age. She walked carefully but confidently and continued into the room with no introduction. The blonde briefly glanced her way and what Morgana saw made her slightly more confident. As nervous as she was, her captor was just as uncomfortable.
Her stride halted at the fireplace. She seemed to inspect the mantle as if dust was the most pressing concern in the room. After a moment of silence Morgana heard the woman sigh and then she turned and locked eyes with Morgana, but she stayed silent.
It gave Morgana but a moment to inspect her captor. She was no noble, she seemed rough. Her golden locks reminded Morgana of Arthur. A tomboy, still beautiful, but fierce. Her attire was not typical for a woman either.
With a leather blouse, trousers, no dress, no jewelry, and an intense stare, the woman appeared battle ready. Yet that intense stare softened after a moment, and as Morgana inspected her she realized her captor was doing the same…
But this was no staring contest. "Why am I here?" Morgana demanded in the haughtiest tone she's ever used, save some bouts with Uther.
Her captor smiled then her face mellowed, "You're here… because you belong here, with me." The blonde woman acted familiar, too familiar.
"Do I know you?" Morgana straightened her posture, trying to recall this woman's face, rather unsuccessfully.
The blonde woman frowned for a moment then, "My name is Morgause, and no you do not know me. But I do know you." After a look of what could only be described as frustration, Morgause shook her head, "This is not how I wanted to meet you." Morgause answered cryptically.
Silence took over and Morgana's foot began fidgeting. Her captor was grasping for words…
Morgana found them for her. "How? And more importantly, WHY abduct me if you wanted to meet me?" Morgana asked the latter half of the sentence angrier than the first. The woma-Morgause seemed taken aback, for whatever reason, her captor was being careful with her words.
Morgause could tell Morgana's patience was waning and took a deep breath. She needed to tell her, but how? How does she put it all into words?
The truth, only the truth would suffice.
"It's a long story. A very long story… Would you mind if I share it?" Morgause put her hand to her chest. "My story."
Morgana raised an eyebrow. Although she wasn't in the mood for a story, she suspected she had little choice anyway. "By all means." Morgana gestured to the chair across the room, no sarcasm spared in her response.
Nonplussed by Morgana's derision, Morgause just nodded and sat down to begin her tale. Morgana listened.
…
Skeptical, then confused, then outraged.
Morgause's story was outlandish, to say the least. Yet the details nagged at the far reaches of Morgana's mind. Too much doubt to rebuke her claims, yet too much doubt to accept them either.
One detail, in particular, was frightening. Uther and my Mother?! It was overwhelming. While that detail clawed at Morgana, Morgause continued the tale… "Stop, stop." Morgana waved Morgause off. "I can't hear anymore." Morgana put a hand to her forehead.
Morgause stopped. This was a lot to take in and she was simply glad that Morgana seemed to have listened.
She gave Morgana a minute to collect herself, but Morgause wanted to explain, no needed to explain why she wasn't there for her, with her.
"May I continue?" Morgause asked gently, regardless of how bad she wanted to unload the reasons for her absence the last two decades, she would only do so at Morgana's pace. Morgana looked up with a somewhat vacant expression and nodded.
"After I was… excised from Camelot, I… for the longest time, I thought you were dead, an illegitimate heir cast out as I was. Yet eventually, I heard news of The Lady Morgana… my sister." Morgause started to ramble.
"I wanted to come find you, to see you. But I knew that while Uther was still alive it wouldn't happen." Morgause sighed shakily, the strong woman that entered the room was nowhere to be found at the moment. "I waited too long, left you with that man for years, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I should've come sooner, much sooner." Morgause turned her back to Morgana.
Morgana stared up not knowing what to say. How could she respond? Could she even empathize? Should she? This woman had kidnapped her.
A quiet minute passed and Morgana needed to know one thing. Regardless of her, "Sister's" sob story.
"Am I a captive here or not?" Morgana changed the subject.
Morgause turned around quickly, "No, no of course not. I just wanted to talk to you somewhere so we wouldn't have to look over our shoulders." Morgause's voice grew soft, "But I hope you'll stay, it's safe here." A poor choice of words.
"Safe!?" Morgana chuckled under her breath, her indignation clear with the usage of the word. Morgana's qualms over being empathetic evaporated for the moment. "Yo-You abduct me, lock me in a room, leave me to stew for hours, uncertain as to whether I'll live or die and call it SAFE!?" Morgana unleashed what she had been thinking for the last couple hours.
Morgause wasn't angry or surprised, just accepting.
"Morgana I know, I know what you are. We are sisters, we both share our mother's gifts." Morgause smiled at her, "I hoped to teach you, somewhere out of Uther's reach. Somewhere safe, and though I am sorry for the method used to bring you here, I do not regret your presence." Morgause drew closer to Morgana through slow steady steps. "I would never and will never hurt you. In my pursuit of you, I lost sig- rather I didn't consider you, I was simply so focused on getting you out of Camelot, I neglected your feelings, your thoughts. It is a mistake I will not make again. I promise." Morgause kneeled in front of Morgana and put her hands on hers. The action made Morgana jump, but she couldn't escape Morgause's eyes. "I'm so sorry." The apology was delivered so softly, that it couldn't be interpreted as anything other than genuine.
Calmer, but still confused, Morgana ignored the implication that Morgause knew of her magic. "If you wanted to speak to me, why abduct me?" Morgana asked, still sour at their introduction.
Morgause pondered the question, simply there had been no time, but she would at least elaborate for Morgana. "News of you only reached me rather recently and when it did, it became a matter of sneaking in without being killed." "That proved difficult to do while right under Uther's nose so I decided to sneak you out instead, though sneak isn't really the right term." Morgause smiled guiltily.
The explanation clearly didn't satisfy. Nor did Morgasue's glib comment at the end. So Morgause pressed on quickly.
"Only a few months ago, I joined Cenred's court and that is the first time I heard your name again. I had thought you dead and I... that isn't important, after learning, I realized there were few if any ways to reach you safely while Uther still sat upon the throne. I imagined our first meeting, rehearsed it in my head. Would you remember me? Would you care? Would you be happy?" Morgause knew Morgana was too young to remember but it didn't alleviate her hopes that somewhere deep down Morgana knew her.
Morgana was somewhat sad she didn't share any of her feelings, but at the moment this woman was still a stranger.
Morgause's recounting of her trials started to drift, and become a tangent, so she caught herself. "I apologize, the story makes me… excitable, anyway, I learned of Cenred's plan to invade Camelot. That limited my options to reach you safely." Morgause sighed. "At this point, I had leverage in Cenred's court. So I made a deal with Cenred to grant you safe passage here, it was hasty and didn't account for how you were brought here, sorry." Morgause added a small guilty apology, one Morgana was tiring of hearing. It didn't sound like she would elaborate upon her end of the deal so Morgana didn't ask.
One detail remained inconsistent. "I don't mean to sound vain, but I believe news of Uther's unwed ward is common knowledge, how did you not come to hear about me?" Morgana shifted skeptically.
Morgause's eyes widened as though that was the most difficult question so far. "I.." She stopped, but it was clear to her that Morgana's skepticism would not be alleviated lest this question was answered. So after a deep breath…
"Before I met Cenred I was imprisoned and for a time anything happening outside of my cell was lost to me. It wasn't until-" Morgause shook her head. Divulging that she had been in prison would suffice, why and how long lacked any relevance, "The details don't matter, I'm sorry, truly sorry for not coming to you sooner. I promise I would have if it were possible." Morgause brushed off the memory clearly not wanting to talk about it.
Well, there's definitely a story there, Morgana thought. However, Morgana wasn't prepared for any more stories. Silence reigned for a moment, but Morgana had one last question that needed to be asked.
"Ok, then… Can I leave?" Morgana said, with no tact, no clever bargaining. It was a request and one she was almost certain would be granted upon spending hours with this woman. She stood, signifying her readiness to leave.
"Wait." Morgause grabbed her arm, "I ask you, please… just to stay just for a few days. You will see, it is safe here…Morgana didn't seem convinced, "I can help you." Morgause all but pleaded.
"Help me with what?" Morgana was startled by Morgause's melancholic plea.
"With your magic." "With our gift." Morgause emphasized, "our".
Morgana had forgotten that Morgause implied she knew. But it didn't matter Morgana wouldn't simply abandon her home for someone who she's only known for a day.
Morgause's desperation somehow made Morgana guilty, "I'm sorry." Morgana watched Morgause's face fall, "Please… just take me home." Morgana begged, her earlier confidence no longer needed.
The exchange had made it clear that this woman meant her no harm. Trust was inadvertently fostered during their conversation and self-preservation was no longer the priority. Before, simply asking to be let go did not seem viable, but now she suspec-hoped that some sincerity would appeal to this woman-her supposed sister.
Morgause collected herself, "Of course. I'm sorry." Morgause released her hold on Morgana's arm, disappointment etched into her being, and turned toward the door.
Morgause had an endless amount of apologies and unfound guilt kept rising up in Morgana. She tried repeatedly to remind herself she'd been kidnapped but the guilt still lingered.
"I prepared two horses in case you wished to leave, follow me." Morgause stood at the door, and Morgana spared no time abandoning her rather lavish room. No, not room, her cell she reminded herself. She wasn't safe here.
Morgana followed behind Morgause as together, they left the room. Morgana free but apprehensive, Morgause sad but willing.
…
Morgana followed Morgause down a narrow flight of stairs and when they reached the bottom she continued on through one torchlit corridor after another. Morgana didn't see anyone else on their trip through the castle. Wherever they were it must've been secluded. The walk was silent, Morgause was still reeling from her rejection.
Soon they reached a set of double doors and upon opening them Morgana was met by the moon. It was nighttime Morgana realized she'd been in that room longer than she thought.
"The horses are right ahead, I'll escort you as far as I can." Morgause looked ahead. Two beautiful mounts waited ahead, glowing under the moonlight.
Both scaled their moonlit mounts and Morgana reared Morgause's horse, ready to depart.
Morgana watched Morgause's shoulders rise and fall as the beautiful woman turned around, a sad plea in her eyes. "You are my sister, just remember that please."
Morgana gave her an unsure nod but it seemed that was enough, Morgause returned her nod with a fond smile. Together they set off for Camelot.
…
It was a long ride, The pair made stops on the way. Conversation was short but pleasant. It was a comfortable ride back, save Morgana's visions as she fell asleep. They took a stop just so Morgana could rest. She was exhausted. A day passed.
At this point Morgause was exhausted too, she just didn't show it. Their riding continued.
She hoped Morgause had not noticed, but that was unlikely. Morgana knew waking up from one of her episodes was quite… loud. But Morgause didn't mention it as they continued onto Camelot.
As Morgana's horse trotted up a hill, Camelot's tapered towers slowly came into view over the hill. They'd arrived.
Morgause had already stopped her horse and dismounted. Camelot was no place for her, the only fondness she held for it was for her sister. They would depart on this hill, surrounded by nothing but greenery.
"This is where I leave you, but before we depart I have something to give you." She wanted to leave something with Morgana to be with her, even apart.
Morgana got off her horse and walked towards Morgause to say her goodbyes. It was quiet, warm and the wind whistled behind them. All in all quite peaceful, considering the circumstances.
Morgause rustled around in her knapsack and pulled from it a beautifully adorned golden bracelet. Without elaborating she handed the bracelet to Morgana who took it out of curiosity.
It didn't take Morgause long to explain, "This will help you with your nightmares," Morgause spoke knowingly, eager to part on good terms.
Morgana appraised the bracelet finding nothing of interest, save the gems, but how would a pretty bracelet stop her nightmares? "How?"
"I have charmed it and the bracelet, if worn, will guide you into peaceful rest." Morgause stood closer to Morgana.
Morgana didn't notice Morgause's proximity as she regarded the bracelet skeptically.
Suddenly Morgana was enveloped in a hug. It wasn't necessarily uncomfortable but it was surprising.
"If you ever change your mind or simply want to talk to me, I shall wait on this hill once a week." Morgause looked contemplative, "Let's say hmm… Friday." She smiled and released Morgana. She was hiding an ache behind her smile.
Morgana couldn't help but return the smile, Morgause had been nothing but kind, except for their introduction that is. A pang of guilt returned to her, one she knew she didn't deserve but…
Morgana turned around back toward Camelot before the mounting contrite could change her mind. Morgause simply watched as she walked away. Someone she'd lost, mourned, and finally found was simply walking away from her, it was crushing. Yet, she kept her smile.
A sister? Morgana's mind churned with the possibilities. She'd been a lonely child, though Gwen and seldom Arthur provided comfort, she'd never know what it was like to truly have a family. This woman, Morgause, was offering her that plain and simple, no strings attached. It was a strange introduction but… Morgana made a decision, this, whatever this was, deserved a chance and before she could regret it she stopped herself. Morgause looked on curiously.
"Two questions." Morgana abruptly turned around. "Did you hurt my handmaiden when you took me?" Morgana asked seriously.
Morgause was surprised but shook her head and answered quickly, "No, just a simple sleep spell."
Morgana nodded and asked her second question, "Will you and Cenred attack Camelot again?" It was clear this question would decide if Morgana would continue to meet Morgause after their departure here.
"Not if I can help it, I have some sway in court. If I can stop an attack I will, I promise." Morgause swore hoping it would be enough. Though she didn't have to, it was unlikely for Cenred to attack again soon, after this defeat he would be licking his wounds for a time yet. She supposed Morgana didn't know that yet. Morgause just realized that she may have left a significant detail pertaining to the state of Camelot out in her explanation to Morgana.
"And I know this may be no comfort, but Camelot survived the attack, from what I understand not too many were lost during this battle," Morgause explained.
Morgana had avoided that question the longest, if the answer were any different then… returning to a desolate Camelot was not a comforting prospect.
A tense moment passed. A one-sided hope lingered between the two. Morgana could feel Morgause's angst, so she decided to ease her worry. She would give this relationship a chance.
"Friday?" Morgana didn't elaborate.
Momentary confusion turned into quiet delight as realization sunk in for Morgause, "Yes… Friday." Morgause answered the vague question.
"I'll be there." They both would.
Morgause sighed, relief relaxing her posture, and turned to mount her horse.
Morgana watched Morgause's horse gallop away. At first, she was terrified, uncertain of her fate. A prisoner. But these last few days had been peaceful, it was eerie how well she got along with this woman. Though unintended, she developed a fondness for Morgause. And if her story was true. If Morgause was truly her sister, she would like to know her.
But it was time now, time to return. To her Father? Morgana scoffed at the thought. No Gorlois was still her Father. Uther had all but abandoned her, and Morgause if that were the truth. But why cast out Morgause and not her?
"Phew," That can wait. She sighed.
Now, do I just march back into Camelot? Morgana stopped in a moment of realization. I can't just show up, how do I explain- Morgana looked herself down…pristine. A prisoner of war? She almost chuckled.
There would be no explaining that. Looking around her all she saw was forest, grass, and… mud. It didn't take Morgana long to think of a solution. It's just… she didn't want to ruin this dress.
…
Mud-covered, barefoot, hair tousled, Morgana stumbled out of the woods toward Camelot's gates. She had acted the swooning maiden in the ballroom. She could play the damsel in distress.
Expecting to find two or so guards at the gate to sell her story, Morgana was surprised as she staggered closer to the gate to find a whole crowd of people. She wobbled closer, nobody had noticed her yet. Knights and civilians were helping to take down the gates. Which were charred black. Morgana was inching ever closer, eager to get some shoes on. Her feet were starting to hurt.
"CHOP!"
Leonhard was busy repurposing the intact parts of the gate that had been aflame for the better part of two days. Chopping away all the scorched wood. Like many other workers, he had been working incessantly on the gate and lower village. Some like him brought their families to help. It was a big job. Though kids weren't much help they made the long day under the sun somewhat bearable. Even the knights were helping and that was rare, nobles rarely got their precious hands dirty. That's how you know the damage was bad. It was worse yesterday, much worse.
Everybody was frozen, their homes destroyed, children without their parents, some parents without their children. It seemed hopeless.
Yet, the Prince himself came down with his knights and without a word started to help clean the mess. At first, just curious, people slowly joined in. Some even found others they had lost in the chaos. The only time commoners like us saw the Prince is when he came down to pick on us. I guess it took an invasion to humble the brat.
Speaking of, where is the Prince? Leonhard looked around, and it wasn't just the Prince that was missing. Where did- Leonhard looked out from the gate, a crowd was gathering.
What the hell is going on!? I can't take any more surprises,
Suddenly the knights stormed out of the gathering forming a circle around the Prince. The Prince had a woman on his back, she didn't look too great. Almost like she had wrestled with a pig. Leonhard shook his head, this was none of his business, he turned and went on about his work.
…
"Lenny!" A feminine voice shouted from behind. Leonhard recognized that voice immediately.
Leonhard turned to find his wife looking at him, "Hey, beautiful." Leonhard had been, let's say… particularly affectionate for the last forty-eight hours. The invasion may have been terrifying, but if anything it reminded him how much he loved his wife. Leonhard picked her up and kissed her, stealing her breath away. After a moment of passionate reciprocation, his wife, Kaelynn pulled away, a dazed but satisfied smile on her face.
"Hello, husband," Kae said in a sultry tone.
"I missed you, where did you go?" She asked, sinking into his arms.
"I was right here, working away. Unlike some of these lazy bastards." Leonhard exclaimed, looking around at the other peasants who were just returning to work.
His wife's face contorted in confusion. "You didn't see?"
"See what, love?" Leonhard returned her confusion.
"The girl with Prince Arthur?" Kae asked.
"What, the farmgirl? I didn't care enough, what was she arrested for having too much fun in the stables? Poor thing was covered in mud." Leonhard felt his wife's hand hit the back of his head. She'd always had a fiery temper, it hurt but he loved her for it all the same.
"Ow, what was that for?" Leonhard rubbed the back of his head.
"That was the Lady Morgana, you dolt!" "They found her!" Kaelynn was on her feet now Leonhard had put her down during the conversion.
Things are looking up for Camelot, Leonhard thought. Leonhard looked at his wife again. With a suggestive smile and low tone, Leonhard pulled his wife back to him, by her waist.
"How was I supposed to know… When I only have eyes for you?" If her smile was any indication Kaelynn was not tired of his affections yet.
Kae laughed, though she was clearly still flattered as she looked back and pierced him with her gaze, peering through her red locks to his lips, then to his eyes. She was beautiful, so beautiful. Leonhard thought.
Fair skin, freckles accenting her face, long red hair, skinny but perfect. Leonhard's hand came to rest on his wife's cheek.
"I think you've worked long enough, love." Kae grabbed his hand, removed it from his cheek, and led him away.
Leonhard followed his wife eagerly, but as they left he caught sight of some kids alone, probably orphaned. And for a moment, a brief melancholic moment he thought of how lucky he was, and how some were anything but. Yet the moment passed and he decided to enjoy his luck, maybe soon have some kids of his own.
…
Isle of the Blessed, 3 days ago
Merlin had been awake for an hour now, kneeling over his mother's body.
Kilgharrah had arrived and saved him, of course, but not hi- Merlin shook his head. He would not blame Kilgharrah, his mother's death was his fault and his alone. The sword he had removed left a scar on his waist, a reminder of his failure. Kilgharrah stood not far, he too grieving the loss, allowing Merlin the space to do so alone.
Through the silence, in dragon tongue, Kilgharrah heard Merlin speak for the first time. "Kilgharrah." Merlin's voice sounded suppressed, almost crushed by the weight of the fog.
That same fog had thickened since Merlin's arrival.
He acknowledged Merlin's call by walking toward him, each step shaking the ground. He stopped and stood on all four, perched looking down at Merlin, solemnly.
Melin stood head heavy, mother in his arms, "I need a favor." Merlin looked at Kilgharrah, a lack of emotion in his tone. Merlin had simply run out of grief at the moment.
"Take me home," Merlin said simply.
The question didn't seem as simple as it was presented. Kilgharrah knew that, but asked anyway, "To Camelot?"
To which Merlin shook his head. No. Then home it is.
Kilgharrah nodded and clutched Merlin, raising him to his back. With Merlin and his mother in tow, they set off.
…
Aberdeen, Merlin's former dwelling
It was as Merlin suspected.
Why did nobody tell him? Why did no one from Aberdeen come to tell him about his Mother's abduction? Will knew he had gone to Camelot, he knew where to find him, and yet no one came.
There was only one reason. It lay in front of him. The ashes and bodies of a dilapidated Aberdeen littered the ground. Home's collapsed, people were crushed, and Aberdeen was but rubble. Nobody came to find him, because there was no one to come and find him.
Merlin stood in the middle of the carnage.
This was magic. Magic had done this. Butchered all these people. He thought back to his fight with Nimeuh, he was not sorry for her, but he remembered how easy it was to tear her apart.
He had done that.
Turned a woman to ash with a simple wave of his hand. For the first time, Merlin was afraid of himself, afraid of magic. Something inside him was this powerful, it was a chilling thought.
"Merlin" Kilgharrah's booming voice shook him from his thoughts.
He turned and met Kilgharrah's worried gaze.
"I know what you are thinking. Magic is no different from a sword. Just as a band of brigands might lay waste to a village, it was not magic that did this… Merlin." Kilgharrah paused. "It was people." Kilgharrah hoped Merlin would not have to suffer a loss this great for a while longer.
Merlin knew he was right, but he couldn't shake this sickening feeling. It was all so personal. At the moment, he couldn't delineate the fact that magic wasn't the sole perpetrator of this massacre.
He wouldn't dwell on it now though. He couldn't, his Mother deserved rest and so did Will.
Merlin had to bury his Mother and find Will. At this point, he didn't have any hope that Will survived, he would look for a body so he could bury both of them.
5 Hours Later…
Merlin looked down at the headstones that lay in front of him. He made makeshift graves, headstones made from piling rocks. It wasn't what they deserved, nor what any of the villagers deserved, but he was quickly learning that neither reason nor merit factor into the killing of a human being.
He would have to leave soon he knew, just where? Back to Camelot? His mission felt over. He had tried and he had failed. He hadn't prevented any battle, just cleaned up after it was done. It was now more than ever that the name Emrys felt so foreign to him. For all his power…
Merlin looked over his shoulder, it felt like the fog of the Isle had followed him here.
Kilgharrah was still there though, imposingly tall. Though Merlin was beginning to take comfort in Kilgharrah's mountainous presence.
It was unspoken, but Kilgharrah stayed ready to take him anywhere, He suspected this would be one of the only times he might get a free ride off Kilgharrah. A defeated smile grew on his face.
He looked to the graves and then back to Kilgharrah, he needed to leave, he wasn't ready, but he needed to go now or he may be stuck.
Camelot it would be for now. For now, there was nowhere else to go.
"Fate can be fickle at times, Merlin. Fate took your home, but it spared Camelot. They've won" Kilgharrah's voice reverberated out.
At least Camelot was spared this grief, Merlin's head tilted upwards at the word.
"Fate," Merlin echoed, that word had followed him here. A disquieting thought halted his movement. Fate had brought him here. Why?
At first, he was keeping fate's promise for the druids, he would not ignore their pleas, their hopes. Then it was Kilgharrah's promise of a better fate for not only Camelot but lands far and wide.
But what future?
Maybe the Druids had seen it, maybe Kilgharrah had too. But he had not. All he has gained since his departure were scars. The only person who had asked him not to travel to Camelot was dead. His mother knew of the prophecy of Albion. But she never cared for it, they argued for a month before she let him go.
His Mother was the only one who cared enough about him to try and convince him not to go. The Druids made him promise, and Kilgharrah made him promises.
For a moment, Merlin felt like a fool. Oh, how he trotted along at everyone's word.
And he was all too eager, stuck in a village, stuck nowhere, hiding himself, hiding his magic. He wanted adventure, he wanted to be something, and adventure he did. Wound to wound, battle to battle, for a future he had yet to see. He'd liked to think it never got to his head. But it did, Greatest Sorcerer Ever… Emrys. The stories he'd been told all those years ago, had his ego truly bested him?
Everyone who surrounded me simply reinforced the notion including…
Merlin looked to Kilgharrah, apprehensive. How far had I gone at his word? I just listened, barely questioning… the Great Dragon. Merlin thought cynically.
He thought back to every one of Kilgharrah's prophecies, his cryptic messages, and all too accurate premonitions. Each time, whether it be the Dragon's egg, Cenred's reinforcements, the Sword, or him fighting Nimueh, Kilgharrah was always right. He always knew, knew everything, and saw everything. Merlin dreaded his next thought.
Kilgharrah knew what would happen, he had known every step of my journey before and after. Kilgharrah had told me just as much, but I hadn't listened. He had seen everything.
He knew my Mother wou- "Merlin?" The subject of his thoughts' voice resonated through the air. He never thought about it before but…
"You knew," Merlin stated cryptically.
"Knew what, Merlin?" Despite Merlin's clear change in tone Kilgharrah's demeanor did not change, the Dragon stood unmoved.
"You knew, you just didn't tell me. You knew I would defeat Nimueh. Otherwise, you would never have sent me just as you knew what I would lose doing it. You used me." Merlin looked up at Kilgharrah, an unfamiliar look in the Dragon's golden eyes.
Kilgharrah didn't respond. Just stood still.
Kilgharrah's indifference only served to make Merlin angrier.
"AM I WRONG!" Merlin demanded.
…
"She was already dead Merlin," Kilgharrah answered cryptically, sounding unashamed, his body easing back into a perched position.
"What do you mean… She was already dead? What does that mean?" Merlin scrambled.
"I see everything Merlin. Even things I would rather not see. I saw you, her, and Nimueh. Sometimes I saw you die, sometimes Nimueh, but I always saw your Mother die. The second Nimueh had her hands on her… Your Mother was dead." Kilgharrah's voice echoed in Merlin's head.
"NO! You-you can't just blame fate. I deserved to know. You should've told me. Maybe, just maybe I could've-" Merlin grasped for the word but didn't utter it.
Kilgharrah was too old for excuses, too old for begging. He knew there was no point. His Mother was fated to die the second Nimueh had taken her. Kilgharrah had no vision of it because sadly, fate deemed Merlin's mother irrelevant. Magic for all its splendor is coldly indifferent, Kilgharrah knew this far too well.
Kilgharrah said nothing. Merlin would hate him either way, at least he was alive. So the Dragon just stood awaiting Merlin's wrath.
Merlin took a moment to collect himself, the revelation had taken its toll. He could almost understand it, but still… Kilgharrah had no right.
"We're done." Merlin would not… no could not trust Kilgharrah anymore. "Leave this place." Merlin could not suffer Kilgharrah's presence any further.
Kilgharrah offered no argument, he knew it was futile to argue. He just nodded and his wings swayed. Kilgharrah stopped he still owed Merlin an apology regardless of the inevitability of his mother's passing.
"I'm sorry, Merlin." He received no response and hesitation gripped the great dragon's wings for a moment before, "WHooSH, WHooSH" Kilgharrah took flight, sailing through the fog up and out of sight.
Merlin was left next to his Mother's grave. Alone. It was then he decided not to go back to Camelot. Though he had friends there, it would be a time before he would return.
Being alone finally gave Merlin the freedom to decide what he truly wanted to do. Whether it be to defend Camelot or whatever else his road had planned for him. He set off, not using magic, no teleportation, he just started walking…
…
One Week Since Morgana's Arrival in Camelot
A week of fawning and doting. Morgana felt more locked away than when she was kidnapped. And she was sick of it.
I knew I'd get it from Uther but Arthur too, it was… suffocating. However, that wasn't her primary concern.
Uther had grown more protective than ever before, he seemed more erratic, obsessively so. It had bled into his duties as King. Arthur has had to step in as of late, the responsibility is crushing him. Catering to Uther's whims and at times restraining him have been Arthur's burden the last few days, a burden I was thankfully spared. Being locked away has its perks I guess.
Gwen has been worried but not obnoxiously so, she seems to be the only sane person left in the citadel.
"Knock, Knock."
"Who is it?" Morgana sounded out from her desk across the room. Though it'd been somewhat stuffy since she'd gotten back she's been alone still and allowed to relax. Catching up with Gwen had been her favorite pastime of late.
"It's just me, Milady." Speaking of Gwen.
"Yes, come in Gwen." Morgana stood quick, excitedly, and they had much to talk about.
As prim and proper as always Gwen entered and quietly closed the door.
"Do you nee-" Before Gwen could finish her usual offer of service Morgana had migrated behind the screen to grab two dresses.
As a show of solidarity and celebration for their victory, Uther was throwing a ball and allowing the lower townspeople a break from their painstaking work fixing the walls and homes. Though Morgana knew it was at Arthur's suggestion and insistence they take this break.
"Green or Gold?" It was a question Morgana had asked many times. She trusted Gwen's opinion. And though the debauchery of the court could be nauseating at times, Morgana couldn't lie. Being the center of attention was quite intoxicating. This would be her first opportunity to do something other than be locked in a room or scared, she was excited.
"Hmm… Definitely green." Gwen smiled at the enthusiasm.
Though it was rather reserved, Morgana noted.
Morgana's smile faltered for a moment, "Are you still worried?" She asked knowingly.
Gwen looked distressed for a moment then sat down on the edge of Morgana's bed without invitation. She was usually not so forward, but Morgana never minded.
"He's usually not gone this long without a word! I mean sure he's pulled the disappearing act before, but at least Lancelot, Gaius, or I knew where he was. But now it's just… he could be hurt or …" Worse Gwen finished the sentence in her head, she couldn't voice it. Something was different this time, she could feel it.
Morgana sat next to Gwen and rested her hand on hers. She was more confident in his return, though the only reason is Morgana knew what Gwen did not.
Merlin has magic. He'll be fine, he has magic. Morgana convinced herself of that over the past few days. Merlin had made her a promise, he would keep it. Morgana was sure of it.
But, truly she did not any more than Gwen. Magic or no…
"He'll be fine Gwen. Trust me." Gwen looked at Morgana, speculative of her confidence. "Despite his lack of balance and general incoordination, when has he failed to return to us?" Morgana questioned, insulting Merlin in the process. It's for Gwen, he'll understand, Gwen relaxed and chuckled at the barb. It had the desired effect.
"Yes, I suppose you're right." Gwen mentally chastised herself for her alarm. She stood up quickly realizing her indiscretion. She'd practically taken over Morgana's bed. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't hav-"
"No." Morgana cut her off quickly. Shaking her head, as if she would allow another apology to be thrown her way.
"Milad-" Gwen was going to question her nonacceptance but was cut off once again.
"No more apologies, no more Milady's, no more, not in this room at least." Morgana was finally breaking Gwen's rigid, proper exterior. Being kidnapped should not and would not change that.
Gwen too seemed glad nothing had changed, she smiled, "Of course, not. So… Are you excited for your return to court? I suppose it's better than being kidnapped… I mean you must have been uncomfortable-" Morgana looked at Gwen amused, she missed her awkward transitions and flushed cheeks. "I mean you don't have to tell me if you don't want to, I understand. Well, I don't understand but-" Ah it's good to be back, Morgana thought.
"It's fine Gwen." Morgana spared her. "And yes I'm excited, though I think there's an argument to be had whether or not being kidnapped or navigating court is more dangerous." She would not lie, Uther would be even more insistent on marrying her off now- Just like that, a thought struck her, as would a sword a knight or lightning a tree.
She had not forgotten but had just decidedly put it aside, there was no reason to bring it up but if... Arthur… was her brother. Uther had been encouraging our union for years. Morgana's hand flew to her mouth. She grew sick. For what reaso-
"Morgana?" Gwen knelt below a confused Morgana.
Oh god, had they… Morgana massaged the memory from her temples. "I'm fine, just… still tired from my ordeal, and it may be too soon for a party." She stood and migrated to her mirror. With her epiphany came dread, she wanted to face neither Uther nor Arthur. To keep it all in, keep it from the man who'd hidden it and the other who is unknowingly complicit. Suddenly she felt tired, really tired.
"Will you still attend the party? I'll tell them you weren't feeling well enough yet." Gwen offered a familiar worry in her tone.
"No, no I'm still going… I think I'll rest before the celebrations though. Thank you, Gwen." Morgana didn't turn around for goodbye and a brief moment passed.
"Milady." Morgana could almost hear the little bow that accompanied the word. A couple of footsteps later, Morgana heard the door shut and heaved out a sigh.
…
Everyone is a mess. Gwen thought. Though Morgana has more reasons than most, Gwen just wished everything would go back to normal. Gwen sighed as she shut the door behind her. She had ample time before the party before she'd have to serve yet again. Maybe I could visit Lan- I mean Gaius…. Yes, Gaius, I should visit Gaius.
Gwen set off toward the physician's chambers, a place that had become a lot more familiar to her since Merlin's arrival and even more so after Lancelot's.
…
It occurred to Gwen on the way that she had no reason to see Gaius. But she was already here outside the door just standing a knock away from Lan-
"Gwen?" Gaius snuck up behind her. Had she been standing there that long?
"Is anything the matter?" Gaius approached, she may have been more familiar with the physician's chamber than before, but random visits were unusual. Gaius suspected something was amiss.
"Ah no… I mean yes, I was not feeling that well if you could…" Gwen cursed herself mentally, now what?
"Of course, come in." Gaius gestured to the door and opened it for Gwen. She entered with a slight bow.
"Now what specifically is the matter?" Gaius entered the room and shut it behind him. As Gaius looked up from the nob he immediately spotted the cause of Gwen's ailment.
"Gwen?" Her name had been called twice now, but this time she didn't have a ready response. Recently she and Lancelot had been growing in their affections, yet no action had been taken.
"I was just- I- Uh, what are you doing here?" Lancelot dropped his knapsack.
He was adorned head to toe in his knight armor. It was clear he was about to head out.
"I- just- I"
Gaius sighed as he watched Gwen stutter away. Kids these days. The two of them have been dancing around each other for weeks now. I just want them out of my chambers. He shook his head, "She needed immediate treatment, but it seems the cure was just here, waiting for her." Gaius did not spare either of them, his suggestion was as clear as day, "Now if you'll excuse me." The two blushed a unique shade of pink as Gaius stepped out.
A tepid moment passed, and Gwen spoke first.
"I'm sorry, were you just leaving?" Gwen gestured notably at Lancelot's sword and armor.
"Oh no- I mean yes I was, but I have a moment." Lancelot's face hardened, "Actually I was going to find you." Lancelot stepped closer.
"What a coincidence." Gwen's response came out as a breath. She was too distracted by his proximity to notice how serious he sounded.
"I have to tell you…" Lancelot put his hands on Gwen's arms.
At this point, Gwen had almost closed her eyes then…
"I'm going after Merlin." Lancelot's statement and the sheer conviction behind it knocked Gwen from her stupor.
"What?" Gwen's lidded eyes burst open, silently asking for an explanation.
"He's been gone too long without any word, neither I nor Gaius have any idea where he is and Camelot was just at war. Merlin is either hurt or in trouble and no one will spare the men to find him. So I must go, alone." Lancelot finished his explanation rather quickly. It seems he was in a hurry to find Merlin.
Gwen pinched her eyes shut and shook her head, "Not you too…" Lancelot's eyebrow raised at the statement.
"First Morgana, then Merlin, and now you. I've had it! I miss Merlin too, but you can't go alone, surely Arthur can drum up some knights. Camelot was just at war you can't go outside its walls. A lone knight, against who knows how many of Cenred's troops still prowling the territory! Just wait, and ask for Arthur's help… please." Gwen put her hands against Lancelot's breastplate. It seemed Gwen was aware of the contradiction in her statement, but she didn't care. She pleaded anyway.
"Gwen, Camelot was just at war and because of that Arthur needs every knight on her walls, ready to defend against another attack. You know that." Lancelot pointed out the flaw in her plea and took her hands in his own, removing them from his chest.
"I know, it's just…" Gwen sighed.
"I know, I know," Lancelot echoed. The room stilled and Lancelot realized he still held Gwen's hands in his own, so he released them. She stilled just as the room did and let her hands fall to her sides. "Gwen." The room was silent.
Lancelot picked up the knapsack he had put down when she entered. "I have to go soon if I am to catch up before the trail goes cold." Lancelot looked at her but she didn't make eye contact. He loaded the sack over his shoulder. "I have to go." He paused for a moment, but no response came so he made for the door. As his hand found itself a hair before the nob he heard something behind him.
"SWooSH" Something billowed out over his shoulders and armor.
"Gwen I have to g-" Lancelot was cut off as he turned around.
"If you are to go then it won't be as a knight of Camelot." Lancelot looked like he was about to protest, but Gwen cut him off.
"Ah no, no honor this, honor that. If you are to come back to me it will be in one piece, do you understand?" Gwen's confident side found little opposition in all of Camelot, and it found none here. "Good, now you will come back to me… right?" The way Gwen could switch from a lion to a motherly hen was astounding.
"I Promise." Lancelot would come back. With Merlin… only with Merlin. He kept that to himself, but to reassure Gwen he gave her hand a comforting squeeze.
She finally broke out into a smile and just paused for a moment like she had something to say. After a moment…
"Gwen I really have to g- mmph." Suddenly Lancelot was pulled down by the cloak she had draped around him as Gwen's lips crashed into his own. It was quick, more of a message than a kiss. But whatever Gwen wanted Lancelot to hear. He had just heard it, loud and clear.
Lancelot pulled away, his head an inch from Gwen's, "Come back soon." Her breath sailed softly past him as Gwen smiled up at him.
Lancelot didn't say anything, all that was to be said had been. He simply gave a small nod and turned around. Soon Gwen was there by herself, standing alone, her smile gone…
…
After his run-in with Gwen Lancelot had one last place to stop before leaving the castle. He was standing outside of Arthur's room, he would not just leave without telling his liege he would be gone. He just didn't expect this would go as well as his last goodbye. Lancelot thought that statement over. Wait, you know what… scratch that. I don't want this to be anything like my last goodbye.
"Knock, Knock." "Sire, it's Lancelot." Lancelot's voice traveled and echoed down the hall.
"Come in, Lance." Arthur's voice was quieter than usual. It was to be expected, he'd been tired from work these days.
"Creak." Lancelot entered and closed the door quickly. He had not donned the cloak Gwen gave him, he would not present himself in such a way to Arthur.
"I have to tell you something." Lancelot used the same line he did on Gwen.
"What is it?" Arthur asked without looking up from his desk.
"I'm going to leave Camelot for a time… To find Merlin." Lancelot didn't mince words.
That drew Arthur's attention, "What?" Arthur sounded expectedly angry. He was under an insane amount of pressure. Everybody knew it. He was practically King, though he was still just a boy, a prince.
"I know it's a horrible time to leave Sire, but I have to-" Lancelot quickly was cut off by a livid Arthur.
"Have to what? Abandon Camelot's defenses, its people. For one man. Not only that but to not even ask? Am I not whom you're sworn to?" Arthur threw Lancelot's oath in his face.
"I am and always will be. But the only reason I am is because of this man. I owe Merlin my life. I have to find him" As do we all, Lancelot thought.
"You realize he could be anywhere? Behind enemy lines, run away somewhere, or even dead!" It was clear Arthur regretted that last word as both of them flinched when it was uttered. Arthur sighed and shook his head.
"No, I can't have my best knight leave amidst Camelot's greatest time of need. It would be desertion. I truly am sorry about Merlin and hope he is well, but Camelot has just been torn asunder and my Father lies wounded still… I need you." Arthur looked like he didn't mean to say those last three words, but they slipped out anyway. He had now stood up with both hands on his desk.
Lancelot stared at him from across silent… "I'm sorry. I have to." Lancelot was adamant, that was clear.
"I see." Arthur's answer was ambiguous. After a moment, "Go."
"If you would still have me, I swore an oath and will retur-" Lancelot's promise was cut off.
"Just go." Arthur sank back into his chair.
"Sire." Lancelot bowed woefully, he truly hated to do this, but his best friend's life hangs in the balance.
As Lancelot turned around and closed the door he heard, "THUNK. AGH!" Arthur's frustration had reached its limit. For a moment Lancelot questioned himself, but only for a moment. Merlin needed him. His very life may be in danger. Lancelot marched quickly down the corridors, hastening every step.
30 Minutes Later
It wasn't long before Lancelot reached the outskirts of Camelot.
"Phew." Lancelot's plan was simple, it all counted on one person… or thing, he supposed.
"Now it's your turn," Lancelot said as he opened the knapsack and a tiny white dragon slithered out. Aithusa.
Aithusa crawled up Lancelot's leg and into his cloak. Accidently being confined these past few weeks, Aithusa grew to enjoy the shade. And Aithusa picked up one other tricky skill while hiding with Lancelot and Gaius.
"Chirrup, Chirrup," Aithusa's little calls echoed in Lancelot's head.
Wow, that's freaky. Still not used to that. Lancelot looked down at the little dragon, "Which way, Aithusa?"
Aithusa's little snout poked out from Lancelot's cloak.
Her snout pointed North and all she could manage to say was,
"Merlin!"...
Wow, that underwent a ridiculous amount of revision. Aithusa's telepathy will be explained later. So will really any questions. I think I'm doing a decent plot-hole cover-up, let me know if it isn't so. Until next time…