Author's Note: okay so the second and third parts a bit short and might seem confusing. I write these chapters while I'm at work and then I write them out when I get home. I wrote the first part originally, then I stopped writing. And then a few weeks went by and I remembered that I was writing about Cat having emotions in the studio, but couldn't remember what I wrote, so I re-wrote it, then I found the original (the second section of this chapter) and while I was typing everything up, I liked both ideas so I included them both, but I couldn't think of a good way to mesh them both together to be ONE part, so I just wrote them as two separate parts.
CHAPTER FIVE
"Good evening!" An interviewer said as Cat walked up to her. "You look gorgeous!"
Cat smiled. "Thank you."
She was wearing a long white sequin dress that flared at the waist and reached the floor. Her hair was down and curly with a silver flower clip holding one side back. Her shoes were white heels that were hidden by her dress.
"And look at you Miss Zoey, you're looking awfully snazzy," the interviewer said.
"Don't make me blush," Zoey said, playfully waving the interviewer off. She was wearing a purple dress that flared at the waist and stopped just above her knees. She had on silver sandals and her hair was in pigtails with clips that matched Cat's.
"I'm Alyssa Schroeder with People Magazine, how are you girls doing tonight?"
"It's loud," Zoey said.
"It is, it's my least favorite thing about the awards."
"It's deafening, but I'm having a good sensory day so it's not too bad."
"What are you most excited about for tonight?"
"Seeing my mom perform and win."
"You don't know that I'll win," Cat said.
"If you don't, we're boycotting."
Alyssa laughed. "Cat, what are you most excited for?"
"I'm excited for the performances," Cat said with a nod. "I'm excited to see my friends, to see who wins."
"Do you have multiple performances?"
"I'm in the opening number, I have a few performances of my own, and I'm hosting the awards except for what I'm nominated for."
"Which is everything," Zoey said.
"How many nominations do you have?" Alyssa asked.
"Twenty-two," Cat said. "I broke the record."
"Wow, congratulations! That's fantastic!"
"They have me nominated for 'break out star' though and I've been in the business since I was sixteen, so I feel like that was an accident. If it's a real nomination then it's twenty-three, but I'm not counting it."
"I wonder if they realize they did it."
"They have to by now. They might have fixed it by now, but when I got my nominations card in the mail it was on there. I really hope I don't win that one, I hope it goes to one of the new artists. I won that title at every awards show I attended when I got put on the charts, I've had my time. It's their turn now."
"Is there anything you want to say to the newcomers that you wish was said to you as a newcomer?"
"Just do your best with your art. You wouldn't be making music if you weren't good at it, so if you don't win what you're nominated for, don't let it get to you or hold you back. If you're only in it for the win, then you're in the wrong industry. And if you start to not enjoy it because you aren't winning awards, you need to take a step back and remember why you wanted to be in this industry to begin with. Just don't let people make you feel like you aren't good enough. You wouldn't be a recording artist if you aren't good at it."
"That's great advice. Zoey, do you have advice for anyone?"
"Yeah, don't go on a singing competition show and audition with a whistle tone. If you do a bad whistle tone, you mess up the whole song and your audition," Zoey said, getting nudged by her mother.
"Shut up," Cat said.
"Well, I can't say it was bad advice," Alyssa laughed.
"It's good advice. Whistle tones can damage your chords, so don't do it a lot. Mariah Carey is a prime example. She did her whistles every performance and now her whistles are foggy instead of crisp and clean."
"We heard it from the Whistle Queen herself, don't abuse the whistles."
"Exactly."
"It was great to see you ladies, I hope you have a wonderful night."
"That you, you too," Cat said before she took Zoey's hand and followed her manager off the carpet.
"Why would you say something like that?" Her manager, Terry asked.
"Like what?" Cat asked, raising a brow.
"About Mariah."
"Because it's true. She sounds like a dying cat," Zoey said.
"I didn't ask you."
"Hey," Cat said. "Watch your tone with my kid. Nothing I said was an opinion, it was a fact. You don't get to tell me what I can and can't say."
"It's my job as a manager-"
"Your job is to make me happy and find new opportunities for me. Not tell me what I can or can't do or say. You've been really getting on my last nerve the last few weeks. I don't know what your deal is, but you're not gonna treat me like that. If this keeps going, you won't have a job."
"You're being ridiculous."
"No, you are. Zozo, I want you to watch your step when we're backstage getting ready, don't step on anyone's dress, and help out where you can."
"I always help," Zoey said.
"It's not a good idea for her to be backstage," Terri said.
"I asked if it would be okay, and it is. She's thirteen, not a baby. Where's Robbie and April?"
"Already in their seats."
"Zo, go find them and tell them to come to my dressing room. I wanna see them before I have to get ready."
"God it," Zoey said, making a beeline for the arena.
Cat looked at Terri for a few seconds. "One wrong move and you're fired... and don't get snippy with my kid again."
"How amazing was our opening act?" Jimmy Fallon asked. "How about our host for the night? Cat, lookin' pretty good out there," he said as he was handed a card. "Alright... First award of the night is for Best Album of the Year. The nominees are... Nicki Minaj... Billie Eilish... Kanye West... Blake Shelton... and Caterina. And the winner is..." Jimmy opened an envelope. "My best friend, Caterina!"
As the audience erupted in cheer, Cat covered her mouth for a few seconds before kissing Robbie and hugging Zoey and April before being escorted up the steps to the stage. She took the trophy from Jimmy and hugged him before he stepped to the side.
"Oh my god..." Cat said. "First of all, thank you so much for voting for me. I really appreciate each and every one of you. I can't tell you how much this and you mean to me. I'd like to thank Andre Harris, my music producer and one of my best friends. My boyfriend Robbie, for dealing with all my crazy and loving me at my worst. My parents for supporting me through my journey. My sister April for being my best critic. Zoey's dad for telling me to follow my dreams. And Zoey... my baby girl and my biggest accomplishment. She's been with me and supported me the most and I'd be lost without her. And thank all of you again for being the best fans a girl could ever ask for. I love you guys so much, thank you again," Cat's voice cracked.
Cat was escorted backstage, and she immediately shuffled her wat to Nicki, who was up next to perform, and hugged her.
"Congratulations!" Nicki said. "I'm so proud of you."
"I love you," Cat said. "God, Best Album of the Year... that's crazy."
"You deserve it. You've been through a lot, and you deserve everything good that comes your way."
"I have to change for my set, but I'll catch up with you at the party. Break a leg out there."
"Love you."
"Love you more!" Cat said as she scurried to her dressing room.
"Uh... Can we stack the 'ooh' two more times?" Cat asked. "I want it to be more noticeable."
"Sure," Andre said.
Cat listened to the song until the part she needed came up. "Ooooooohhhhh," she sang, almost siren-like.
"That sounds good."
"Okay, one more."
She repeated the note before she took her headphones off and hung them on her microphone and leaving the recording booth. "How's it sound now?"
"Fantastic. I think it's album ready."
"I wanna add some adlibs to 'To You From Me' and then listen to everything and see if I wanna add anything else before we put them on any registers."
"We can do that. Are you feeling okay? You look like you don't feel good."
"I'm just... stressing out."
"About what?"
"April."
"Why?"
"I think she's doing drugs again. I don't think she's doing them at my house or around Zoey, but she's having weird bursts of energy. I don't like it. I'm scared for her."
"Have you talked to her?"
Cat shook her head. "No yet. I don't have the balls."
"If it's serious, you need to. I know it's hard to talk about, but you need to talk to her."
"I know, I just... when if she goes on a bender because I call her out on it?"
"Then you deal with that if it happens."
"I love her too much to lose her, Andre," Cat's voice cracked. "I don't know what to do without her."
"Is it something Robbie can help you with?"
Cat shook her head. "He shouldn't have to deal with it. He does enough for me, April and Zoey already. I don't want to burden him with my paranoia."
"If it's something that he can help you with, it won't be a burden to him. He loves you more than he lets you think. He's in love with you, he would do anything to make you happy."
"I don't want him to worry."
"He practically lives with you. He has a right to know what's going on around him at the very least."
Cat sighed and sat in a desk chair next to Andre, resting her head against his shoulder. "I'm scared for April. And Zoey. They've gotten so close; I can't stand to watch my baby lose her favorite person in the world. My heart would shatter for her. I never want her to go through the pain of losing someone she loves."
"She'll have to eventually. Hopefully it doesn't start with April."
"God, I hope not... I just want April to be happy and healthy and sober... and happy. She deserves at least that much."
"Everyone does."
"Let's try that one more time," Andre said.
Cat let out a small sigh, pushing her hair out of her face. "I'm ready when you are."
"Go ahead."
"God I wish somebody would have told me when I was younger that all bodies aren't the same," Cat sang. "Photoshopped itty bitty models on magazine covers told me I was overweight. I stopped eating, what a bummer; can't have carbs and a hot girl summer. If I could go back and tell myself when I was younger, I'd say, "pst," I know Victoria's secret, and girl you wouldn't believe... she's an old man who lives in Ohio, making money off of girls like me. Cashing in on body issues, selling skin and bones with big boobs. I know Victoria's secret, she was made up by a dude."
"Alright, that was a lot better," Andre said. "Are you still feeling down?"
"I guess I'm just not in the mood today," Cat said as she hung her headphones up and walked out of the booth, sitting on the couch.
"Any reason you're not up to it today? Stressing about April still?"
Cat shook her head. "I'm just having an off day. I'm tired."
"Were you up late?"
"Kept waking up. I've been having nightmares."
"What about?"
"Sinjin."
Andre gave her a sympathetic look. "I'm sorry... I'm sorry you keep having to relive it."
"And the baby."
"Does that happen often?"
"Sometimes... I just want my baby," her voice cracked. "I never should have given her up. That was the worst mistake I ever made."
"It's gonna be okay, Lil Red," Andre said, hugging her.
"I need it to be okay now."
"There's nothing we can do right how. I wish I could help."
"I don't even know who has her. How do I know she's safe? How do I know she likes it where she's at? What if she's not even in L.A.?"
"You can always ask the adoption agency. They probably can't give you specific details, but maybe they can ease your mind."
"You think?"
"Yeah. And yanno, if you need a baby fix, Tori and I have two of them. You can steal Cameron and Addison anytime you want."
"I might not give them back."
"Sometimes we'd be okay with that."