Hello everyone and welcome everyone to the second chapter of Fate/Stay Cooking Game Night. With me again is my friend and co-writer/author, JoySeeker101.
Joy: The start is finally ready to push hard on the accelerator and gain momentum! Things will pick-up! And so will troubles for Shirou!
They might. People do seem to like the story so far.
Joy: That's normal! The story is good, of course people love it! They have good taste :D
True. Anyways, would you like me to bring in our guest?
Joy: Go! Go! Go!
Well then, here's Taiga.
Taiga: (Walks in) "Hello~"
Joy: Sexy Tiger! Niiice!
(WHAM!)
Taiga: (Hit Joy over the head) "Don't call me Tiger!"
Joy: Ah-ha! I am only a line of text! You can't hurt me! XD
Uh, actually… We're in a rift in time and space… So…
Joy: Same thing. I am here, she is there. She can only fume and take it. The "Hit Boy" trope stopped being funny in the 90s. To your face, Taiga.
… Did you forget her weapon's effect…?
Joy: Whatever. Yes it hurt. Happy?
I'm just messing with you. I want to have a laugh.
Joy: Fair enough :)
Taiga: (Deadpan) "I'm right here you know…"
Joy: And?
Taiga: "I WILL FIND A WAY TO HURT YOU!"
Joy: Having a Goal is important. In the meantime, please give us a good disclaimer.
Taiga: "Why should I!?"
I'll actually let you hurt him. (Points thumb to Joy)
Joy: As long as she is happy and complies, let her. God forbid we let her not have it her way.
Taiga: (Has a predatory smile) "Deal~! These two don't own the Fate Series, The Gamer, or Restaurant of Another World… (looks to us) Is that the right name?"
Joy: Yes.
Taiga: "Thank you. Now where was I…? Ah yes; Just the ideas they make for the story, original characters if they add them, and changes to the story. That good?"
I think it is.
Joy: Perfect, good job.
Taiga: "Good~ (Pulls out her bamboo sword) Now for our deal~"
Joy: Go ahead. Last time, Light. After this you either start getting it or the deal's off.
(Straight voice) I have no idea what you mean.
Taiga: "Start running eye~"
Joy: Already doing it. You others enjoy the story, I'll be back after the obligatory 'Joy gets the shaft' moment… (Runs while Yakkety Saks plays, and Taiga chases him)
(Sweatdrops) Onto the story…
Chapter 2: Party, Training and Information; Oh My!
(The Kaleidoscope)
The tree kept growing its fruit at a steady pace, each passing moment with the sound of the faint heartbeat coming from the big red thing growing just a tidbit louder.
"It's coming along nice." Gaia said.
"Growth rate is well within expected parameters, we are right on schedule. Why are you here, Goddess Gaia?" The System asked.
"I need your help to set up a [Chat Room] of sorts between Shirou and his father, as a way for both to find relief in each other's company after believing death separated them. And between us, you are the more Tech Savvy and the one I trust the most in updating [The Gamer] powers in a way that won't break anything. And being able to communicate through time and space itself"
"The System will do just that for Host Shirou," the System agreed. "Should they be able to talk to Illyasviel von Einzbern as well to have her not be a threat to the Host in future Grail War?"
Gaia thought about it for a second. "You can, if you can get it past the Einzbern's field without detection."
"Done."
"BWUH!?"
"What?"
"ALREADY?! EVEN I NEED TIME TO DO THAT TO MAGIC BARRIERS!"
"It is between The System required abilities. In order to find Host Candidates, no barrier can exist."
"Oh, come ON! THAT'S BROKEN!"
"Says the one who made a literal RPG power," the System shot back.
"... Touché…"
"Not that this isn't a fascinating conversation…" Kiritsugu Emiya stated, getting the two's attention
"Yes?" Gaia asked, rolling her eyes.
"What are you talking about…?" he asked dryly.
"Shirou's power has a feature that can add people to a [Party]," Gaia explained. "With it is the [Party Chat Room] that lets others talk to one another to send messages. The System here helped expand the [Chat Room] and [Party] to be multiversal. Meaning he can talk to you soon, and your daughter, his sister."
"... His sister too?" the soul asked with a terse tone.
"It has to happen, sooner or later." System answered.
"If not, she would attempt to kill him due to her "Families' lies about you and your wife abandoning her for Shirou." Gaia added.
"THEY DO WHAT!?" he roars in anger at what they did.
"Gaia…" The System tried saying.
"And force her to be the Lesser Grail like her mother, though inhuman tampering…" Gaia stated, looking angered. She might not like her sister's mytides, but she can agree that humans can be cruel when they want something, and do it though amoral means.
"Gaia, System believes you have said enough…"
There was a cold fury coming out of Kiritsugu's crystal. He wanted to break free, and march right on up to those… those… bastards, and show them why you should never anger the Magi's Killer.
"... I believe I just made him pissed off…" Gaia stated, sweating a bit at what she was seeing.
"May I suggest you stop talking? Even if it is scientifically interesting, the System believes our guest is not the right Test Subject to see if souls can have an anger induced aneurysm." the System finally managed to say.
Gaia nodded. "True, but his fatherly wrath is a good sign he's not a heartless father," she whispered to the System.
"That smells of excuses from somebody that said too much, but it has also great value, so The System will pretend to not notice."
"System, how soon can I get my new body and train…?" Kiritsugu asked in a cold fury.
"Six months." the thing answered.
"And the training?" he asked.
"A few years," both gods answered.
"Almost until the day of the Fifth Holy Grail War," The System state
"You've got to be kidding me…" he said, sounding like he wanted to bash his head against a wall. "... Is it against the rules if I use Time Magic to stretch Time a bit? Just to cram more training in?"
"Not too much. Time is more frail than what you can imagine." Gaia answered,
"There are worlds that use this to help train people in short amounts of time," The System satted. "The DB Universe uses this with something called the Hyperbolic Time Chamber. The System can set something like that up in the skill [Instant Dungeon (I.D.) Create/Illusion Barrier/Protected Space], if that is fine with you, Gaia?"
"If used in moderation, I have nothing against it. Sorry but Time Magic is a touchy subject for me. But In this case I can close an eye."
"Why's that?" both asked her, sounding confused.
"I saw men and Gods drive themselves insane by trying to rewind time and change the future, only to ruin everything around them because they are unable to comprehend that sometimes, bad things have to happen."
"That is true," Kiritsugu agreed. "And there are those that would abuse it as well."
"But doesn't the Chaldea Security Organization use Time Travel to make sure history stays on course?" The System asked Gaia.
"One thing is fixing something that went wrong, another is throwing the Natural Order of things down the drain to save your wife whose death inspired the change that turned the world in a better place."
"... Do I dare ask…?" Kiritsugu asked, how she knows something like that.
"Long story…" she groans, feeling the headache of remembering that incident coming. "I don't agree with my sister's actions, but her reasons are justified at times about humanity…"
"We are human after all," Kiritsugu stated.
"And I love and hate you for that, your being able to go both ways of the spectrum to the very extreme always scares me." Gaia admitted.
"To be fair the gods did base humans off themselves, so that means mortals and gods are the same, deep down." The System pointed out.
"Let's say that it hurts to see it all the same."
Kiritsugu sighed. "This is going to be a long six months…"
"But worth the effort. Use them to plan your own training for Shirou, so you will be free to both spend time with him and help him." System answered.
That he couldn't deny. At least he was able to see his son's progress.
(Tower of Avalon)
In Avalon, Merlin was hard at work, making new spells, magic and potions to make sure Shirou would be able to become the God of Cooking.
"So if I add this to this compound… I could-" Merlin muttered, until he sensed someone he hadn't in a long time. "Well, it's been a long time… Morgan Le Fay~"
"Imagine my surprise when I felt a Disturbance I could not track, and saw how a soul went missing after an Old One came collecting it just like that! Just as a big surprise as me being unable to track anything that is happening… Care to explain?"
Merlin gave his charming smile. "And you think I had something to do with it~? I don't have access to the Root dear Morgana~"
"I thought you had long since learned that I can tell when you try to bullshit your way out of trouble. Spit it out."
"And if I don't? What~? We both know you can't hurt me, and your grudge against your sister ended after her defeat at your child's hands. So you have no cards to hold."
"And here I thought you would have liked some risque pictures of Gaia… I guess I was mistaken."
"Wait what!?" Merlin asked in shock. "How!? Gaia's never shown her true form to anyone!"
"Then don't believe me and forever wonder if I do have those or not. I will just burn them."
"I can just use my Clearvoice to check you know~ Not even you can bypass that~"
"And risk me telling Gaia you saw them? She will hate you forever, a fate worse than death."
Merlin shrugs. "She's Shirou's anyways, right next to your sister and others that like the boy~"
"Oh, well! At least I tried! Here! All yours!" she said.
"... These are pictures of a tree without leaves…" Merlin said flatly.
"Exactly! A Naked Tree! Ahahahaha!"
"Your sense of humor is despicable."
"Like you're one to talk," she shot back. She then got serious. "But seriously. What the hell is going on? What was that Elder God that took Kiritsugu Emiya's Soul, and why is Kischur Zelretch Schweinorg outside the Kaleidoscope?"
Merlin sighs, looking serious as well. "I'm not sure if I'm actually allowed to say it, honestly." He then summoned the mirror Gaia gave him. "I'll talk to them. Gaia, you there? We have a situation…"
Morgan looked like she was going to smack Merlin for making a joke, but to her surprise, the mirror started forming an image. "What now Merlin," a female voice Morgan had never heard of called though.
"The System hopes this is important."
"Morgan Le Fay is here," he satiated without preamble.
"Okay, okay, what in the hell is going on here! Who are these two!?" Morgan shouted, demanding answers.
"The Elder Gods you were looking for." Merlin answered, giving his smug smile.
"I thought we were talking about the Edgy Loser ones, NOT MOTHER NATURE AND THE GUARDIAN OF TASTE!" she shrieked.
"Wait, you know about the Gourmet System?" Merlin asked in surprise.
"... I may have met a few of their champions…" she muttered, blushing in embarrassment at her reactions to their food.
"Three different Gods of Cooking are still waiting for you to pay the bill."
She blinked in confusion. "But I could have sworn I did… I gave them the gold and jewels to pay for the meals."
"Yours. You have not paid for the meals you offered to their entire restaurants as a way to show-off."
Morgan had the decency to blush. "How much do I owe…?"
"Projecting the total…" and a one followed by A LOT of zeroes appeared, enough to fill every wall.
Bothe Merlin and Morgan's jaws dropped. "THAT CAN'T BE RIGHT! I know it wasn't this much!"
"Inflation hits hard."
"YOU JUST ADDING A LATE FEE, AREN'T YOU!?" she roared at The System. "I was that late to pay them for this much! … Unless time moves differently for the ones I eat from…"
"Of course it does, you fool! Everybody knows that!" Merlin, still horrified, answered, shouting at the girl's blunder.
Morgan gulped. "... How long has it been since I was last at their restaurants…?" she asked, fearing the answer.
"One second here, ten years there. Do your math."
Morgan's face paled. "Y-You're joking… Right…?"
"No, As of now three other zeroes have been added, please pay or it will keep increasing."
Morgan sighs and pulls out three priceless diamonds. "Will these do?"
"You have five seconds to confirm payment before they are no longer enough. Do you confirm the payment?"
She nodded. "I do, yes."
"Very well. Your bills have been paid. Congratulations for not being a cheap miser."
"HEY!"
"This seems odd of you, did you get visited by some other God of Cooking candidate?" Merlin asked.
"... Nnnooo?"
"Big Fat Lie detected!" System answered.
"HA-AH! You got enraptured by good food!" Merlin said with a mocking laugh.
"SHUT UP!" She roars at the sage.
"The System registered three different orgasms in as many meals."
"... The first doesn't count… It helped me regain my sanity…"
"They all say that." Merlin muttered under his breath with a smirk.
Gaia and Morgan's eyes twitched. "You shut up!"
"Impossible. My voice is just too good to take it away from the world!"
" £$%/"%$!&"
"SYSTEM! THAT IS NOT A PROPER WAY TO USE THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANCIENTS!" Gaia roared, appalled.
"There is not enough soap to wash a mouth that filthy." Morgana admitted, impressed.
"I assure you my mother would NEVER do that!" Merlin answered, incensed.
"... Do I dare ask what he said?" Kiritsugu asked, the only one who didn't understand what was going on.
"Trust me, I dare not repeat what System said, but it was a string of the foulest epithets you can imagine."
"He annoys even extra dimensional beings, that's a gift." Kiritsugu said, awed. He then changed the topic. "So is Morgan going to help us now? Because I don't know how I feel about her helping my son…"
"I have you know, you miscreant soul, that there is nobody better than me as a teacher for your brat! What? You think Panty sniffer, Earth Milf or Living scribbles can do a better job than me?!" Morgana asked back with a roar.
"Forgive me for being skeptical about the one who brought down Camelot…"
"I was clinically, and legally, insane. That doesn't count." Morgana answered.
"That's stretching it a lot." Gaia muttered.
"... I truly regret what I did back then… I was driven mad when my father chose my sister…" She then glared at Merlin. "Didn't help that this idiot told my sister to show no emotions at all while she was King…"
"Correction! I said to not be driven by her emotions ONLY! But to use reason too! It is not my fault if she instead took it to absurd limits!"
All of them gave him a flat look.
"It may come as a surprise, but I do recognize my mistakes, and even if only on a small scale, I know I helped create a monster. But I also need to say that I only made a small contribution, not the entire cause. I started the fire, but the inferno grew by itself."
"Well you could have been clearer about it…" Morgan stated dryly.
"You cannot put all the blame on me just to excuse Arturia's actions, I helped her issue grow unwillingly, yes, but she then walked that path on her own. The fault lies on BOTH of us."
Morgan let out a frustrated sigh. "... I hate that you're right…"
"See it like this, you can keep hating me, because I frankly don't care if people do, AND you can save Arturia and redeem her… With Godly Food reminding her what Emotions feel like."
She pinched the bridge of her nose. "Fine…"
"I'm still unsure about this," Kiritsugu stated. "How do we know we can trust her?"
"Mister Kiritsugu, I believe we can try trusting her. I will take responsibility for this." Gaia answered.
If he could, he'd give the embodiment of the planet a flat look. "I'm the Magus Killer… I have the right to be skeptical about her…"
"Yes, yes. I am aware you love your job." Gaia answered, rolling her eyes.
"Ther System can put her under a binding contract," the System suggested.
"Please! I know EVERYTHING about those!" Morgana said, scoffing in derision.
"Here." the contract appeared floating in front of her.
"...Oh, shit this is a tight one…"
Merlin looked and whistled at it. "You made sure there are no loopholes anywhere~"
"The System takes no chances on hosts' safety."
"Fine, as a show of good faith, I will sign this thing." Morgana conceded, annoyed. A feather pin appeared in her hand, and she signed her full name. When she did, what looked like a Servant's Crest appeared on her hand and inside the System.
"Oh… Fancy. What now?" she asked.
"You'll be helping us out with changing things up," Gaia stated. "You know my sister, right?"
"Unfortunately, I do." her tone was as dry as sandpaper.
"We're trying to help her get better, like you did."
"... FINE! But I won't be in the same room with her for longer than necessary!"
"Should I ask?" Kiritsugu questioned.
"The day I will feel the need to share my Life-Story with a bunch of Magus Killers, Deities, Perverts or Eldritch Abominations from the 'Beyond the Void' I will notify you!" She answered with a tone almost physically dripping venom.
"Jeez." Kiritsugu muttered.
"I'm guessing you're going to help Sakura in this timeline, right~?" Merlin asked, in a tease.
"Do I have to?"
"Do you want to?" System asked back.
"...Yes."
"You want to make it different then than the other timeline?" Gaia asked.
She nodded. "I want to do the same, but something different."
"The System can offer a suggestion: Host Shirou can mutate the worms into snakes with the right combination of Ingredients," The System suggested. "Since she does summon Medusa in her timeline, her body and powers may have an affinity for snakes."
"That and Shadows," Merlin reminded them of Dark Sakura timelines. "But we should also keep the water aspect as well. She might be able to use the two to make water that is from deep oceans~"
"That would require the Alchemical Ingredient known as Liquid Shadow. The System will leave acquiring it to Merlin. Using that will achieve both goals." System answered.
"She does have a thing for Imaginary Numbers, if we can awaken Fairy Eyes in her," Merlin stated, already planning.
"Would feeding her actual Fairy Eyes help?" Kiritsugu asked.
Said Fayes glared at the crystal. "No! We are not doing that!"
"Struck a nerve, oh depravest of the Faykind?" the soul asked, mockingly.
"If we can get a Phantasmal Beast, then maybe," Gaia stated. "I'm willing to let Shirou have some of the Phantasmal Beast of the reverse world to use in cooking."
"A good substitute." System answered.
"That works," they agreed.
"You people are insane. And that means I am already liking this! Ha-ah!" Morgana admitted.
"Well, me and Morganna have work to do," Merlin stated. "Do you have anything else to talk about?"
After a confirmation that they didn't, Merlin turned the mirror off. He then gave Morgana his smirk again. "So, did that answer all your Questions~?" He teased her.
"For now it will have to do. Do I have to meet the boy now or is there a schedule or something?" Morgana asked.
"One step at a time, Zelretch is showing him the ropes. Once Shirou's father will get his new body, you both will join the training, and we can say that the real thing will start. Now it will be just warming." Gaia answered.
Morgana jumped at seeing Gaia had appeared. "Wha- How did you get-? Never mind… I forgot who I was talking to."
"I decided to hang around until you decide, just in case."
"... Why does it sound like you don't trust me?" Merlin asked.
"Who knows!" both girls stated flatly. Merlin just grumbled at them.
(Emiya Household)
After breakfast was eaten, Zelretch addressed the elephant in the room, as soon as Taiga left for the bathroom.
"How much will you tell her? About you, Me, and everything else?"
Shirou looked unsure. "I'm not sure… I don't want to get her mixed in with Moon Lit World. She's just a normal human."
"True, just remember that lies have the horrid habit of lasting very little, so be careful."
Shirou nodded. "I'll do what I can if that happens. But I'll only do it if she becomes a Magus somehow."
"If Merlin has his way, she will be…" Zelretch though, unknowingly muttering that out.
"That is not an answer that makes me feel at ease." Shirou admitted.
"... Did I say that out loud?" he asked in horror.
"Yep."
"Crap!" He groaned out. "Just be on guard if something happens, okay?"
"I just wanted to be a normal schoolboy, with some Hero-ing thrown in the mix…" Shirou muttered in dismay.
"Sorry about that. Fate is kind of a bitch somethìimes."
"SWEAR!" Tigai shouted, returning from the restroom. "Don't say things like that in front of Shirou!"
"Poop, Dang it, Tarnation, Holy Manure and Boggers!" Zel answered with a straight face.
"...Very mature." Taiga answered, unamused.
"... Why do I feel like I'm the mature one in the house…?" Shirou asked rhetorically.
"The System would give the Host sympathy if The System could," The System replied in his head.
'Where were you?' he thought in answer.
"System was basically playing baby-sitter with Gods and Entities of unlimited power and the mentality of spoiled toddlers. Host Shirou is basically what anchors The System to sanity. Please do not be corrupted by them."
'I think [Gamer's Mind] prevents that,' Shirou thought back.
"The Entourage Gaia is building may prove to be a challenge to that too. Be strong, young man!"
'Oh, God…' he thought. 'But wait, she was the one to give me that power though.'
"Gaia can have Moments. Just be patient." System answered.
"Uh, Shirou, you there?" Taiga asked him, waving her hand in his face.
"Uh? Oh! Sorry! I was…"
"Thinking about groceries." System suggested.
"Thinking about groceries!" he repeated. "I was wondering if you could get something for lunch if that's okay. I found out I need a few ingredients for the burgers and fries." He wanted to get her out of the house for a little bit so he can learn a bit more of his [Gamer] powers, and make up a good lie to why he was spacing out.
"I mean… Yeah? I guess I can?" She answered, looking confused.
"He would do it himself," Zelretch joined in, knowing what Shirou was doing, and had gotten a message from Gaia to teach him, "but I have his lesson plans statered and he can not miss them."
"Ah, yes. You are a teacher, not a hobo he is generously feeding and giving a home to! Right!"
"That was unnecessarily mean…" Zel answered, sniffling.
"Oh, stop the crocodile tears!"
'System, thank you for being somewhat normal…' Shirou thanked him in his head.
"The System would take the compliment, but the System is also aware of its being considered Abstract/Absurd even by normal Eldritch Deities, so the System feels very sorry for the Host."
Shirou only lowered his head. He knew being a Magus would be difficult, but he didn't sign up for this, just a hero of justice.
'Maybe it was some fine print I did not read?' the young man thought in misery. 'Even though I didn't sign something…'
Taiga left to get what was needed, and Zelretch saw the look on Shirou's face.
"I know that expression. And I say I am innocent." Zel said.
"The more you say you are innocent, the less I believe you to be." Shirou answered, scoffing.
"Well this time I am," he stated.
"This time."
"Honest!"
"..."
"Youngsters these days! No faith in their elders!"
Shirou felt he was getting a headache, and this is how someone would feel with him. "Why do I feel like I'm going through something someone else did…?"
In another location, a raven haired twin tail girl in red sneezed.
"Ugh! Feels like Sympathy and Annoyance wrapped into one." The girl commented.
Back with Shirou…
"Can we get to what you wanted to teach me?" Shirou asked.
"Hohoho! Sure! As Luck would have it… I do have a small list here!" Zel answered while pulling out a thick roll of parchment as thick as Shirou's arm. "First on the list is going over your party menu. I was informed it had an upgrade to it."
"And that is good news?"
"You can talk to your father and sister from other dimensions, as well as others," he stated, surprising the boy.
"Are you serious!?"
"As serious as a heart attack! You got entangled in something BIG, my boy! None of us do things by half! We do things in Style!"
"Indeed, Host Shirou," they System stated, "When you become the God of Cooking of your Universe, or should it be said: Pocket-Multiverse, you'll be traveling to other universe and other timelines/the past to collect ingredients that you are requested to gather by The System or other gods of your reality."
"Oh…"
"You can do it, believe in yourself." Zel said.
"Yes, and Host has until after the Fifth Holy Grail War to have his final test," the System told him.
"And when will that be?" Shirou asked.
"... Should we tell him System?" Zelretch asked the elder god.
"I believe [The Gamer] would tell Host anyways, and make it a [Long Term Quest] for him to complete," the System stated.
Just then, said [Quest] appeared.
"Eh! There it is!" Zel said, chuckling.
Quest Alert
Survive the Holy Gauntlet
Due to your father, Kiritsugu Emiya, having Saber destroy the Corrupted Holy Grail he unknowingly just halted it, not fully stopping it.
This is what caused the fire five years ago.
The next Holy Grail War will be in five years instead of forty-five like it should have been.
You have these next five years to change things in this timeline, get stronger, smarter, learn new skills and abilities, and save and change the fates of those that can be allies, and future gods/goddesses of your reality.
I know you can do this Shirou, you've proven that you can, time and time again.
Note: This is a Long Term Quest so things will change over time due to actions you take, so be warned.
Reward:
100,000,000,000,000 EXP
100,000,000,000,000,000 Yen
Win The Fifth Holy Grail War
Get Tested by The Gourmet System to Start Becoming the Good of Cooking, Crafting, Heroism, and Smithing.
Bonus Reward:
?
?
?
?
?
Fail Penalty:
Death of You and The Whole World.
Y/N
"That's… That is a lot to do, and a lot of zeroes…"
"No pressure! Baby steps!" Zel answered with a thumbs-up.
"So it's a crescendo?" Shirou asked, worried.
"A steep one, yes." System answered.
"Baby steps."
"I know, I know." Shirou answered, sighing. He pressed the Y, accepting the [Quest], knowing he'll have to take part in it, if he had to guess. "I'm guessing I get dragged into the War unwillingly most of the time?"
"More often than not, yes. I believe that is Alaya's doing now that I think about it." Zelretch stated, now thinking about most of the Fifth Holy Grail Wars he watched.
"Should I be worried then?" Shirou asked.
"Only if she catches us before the start of Fifth Holy Grail War, Host," the System stated. "We believe that will be the best chance to help fix her through your cooking and can be an evaluation on how close you are to becoming a true candidate."
"Wait, help fix her?" Shirou asked, confused.
"You see Shirou, Alaya is an Elder Goddess, like Gaia and the System, she is the collected unconsciousness of humanity itself, so how do you think she'd become seeing millions of deaths, genocides and other horrible things happen to the ones she was sworn to protect?"
"... She's started to act on the darker parts of Humanity, thinking it was the right way to save it from itself…!?" Shirou stated, getting as soon as it was laid out in front of him.
Due to figuring out Alaya
Your INT and WIS have gone up by 1
Quest Alert
Saving Humanity's Light
Alaya, the misguided Will of Humanity and Counter Force, has fallen into Despair. I plead for you to help save my sister Shirou.
Purify her Soul and return her to her former Glory.
Note: This is a Long Term Quest so things will change over time due to actions you take, so be warned.
Reward:
100,000,000,000 EXP
100,000,000,000,000 Yen
Save Alaya from Herself
Bonus Reward:
?
?
Fail Penalty:
Forced to Become Alaya's Sword or Her 'Death' by The Gourmet System
Y/N
Shirou gulped. "I don't know what would be worse… me being her slave or her being killed off."
"The System would only make her a slave to know how it feels," the System ststed.
"That's worse!"
"I guess the Abstract Entity means it as a lesson, to see how it feels to be somebody's slave in the hope of teaching her how bad that is." Zel guessed.
"Still…"
"You still have to accept or deny the mission," Zelretch reminded him.
Shirou took a deep breath, and pressed Y to accept the [Quest]. "I'll do my best to save her."
"That's all we can ask for Host Shirou," the System stated.
"Alright, now before anything else happens, should we get started?" Zelretch stated, getting serious and back on topic.
"Yes, yes. Maybe we should." Shirou answered.
"We'll start with the [Party] then, and after that, have you pull up your status sheet," he informed.
Shirou nodded. "How do I-?"
"Just say [Party Invite] and it should pop up," he informed.
"[Party Invite]," he called out, and just then it appeared.
[Party Invitations]
Who would you like to invite?
Please speak or type here:
There was a holographic keyboard in front of Shirou if he wanted to type a person's name. "Huh, in case I need to connect to someone without being heard." He tried it and it worked.
Kiritsugu Emiya
Kischur Zelretch Schweinorg|
Shirou sent the invitation. Zel only smiled at seeing this.
Shirou Emiya has invited you to the Party.
Do you wish to join?
Y/N
Very good my boy," he complimented the kid, pressing the Y to accept the invite. "You're father should get his right now. So I should show you how to use the [Party Chat] and [Party Talk]."
(The Kaleidoscope)
Kiritsugu was just minding his own business when he saw, somehow, the invitation.
Shirou Emiya has invited you to the Party.
Do you wish to join?
Y/N
"I got Shirou's invitation." he called out to the other two that were with him.
"Well then you should accept it," Gaia stated, smiling.
He did just that and he got a massage.
Shirou: Dad, are you there?
If Kiritsugu could, he'd be smiling. He then wrote back.
Kiritsugu: Hey Shirou, I'm glad to hear from you.
Kiritsugu: Or read from you.
Shirou: I missed your bad jokes, dad.
He just laughed at his son's remark.
Kiritsugu: Hey now.
Shirou: "Bad" Good, not Bad "Bad"... You know?
Kiritsugu: That's good to know at least.
Kiritsugu: I take it you got your new powers and 'tutores'?
SHirou: Yes, dad. But it's all so… So…
Kiritsugu: Different?
Shirou: "Scary", mostly.
Shirou: But this [Gamer's Mind] does help me out from truly being terrified by all this.
Kiritsugu: Wish I had something like that during the Fourth Grail War honestly.
Kiritsugu: Would have made things a whole lot easier on me.
Shirou: Dad. The Grail, the War. How bad was it? Really?
Kiritsugu: Honestly?
Kiristugu: It was the most messed up thing to ever happen.
Kiritsugu: I honestly thought a Ruler Class should have come.
Kiritsugu: But I think it wouldn't have really helped things, in hindsight with Angra Mainyu in control of the Grail.
On Shirou's end, said boy grimaced at the thought.
Kiritsugu: What I did, I did it with the full belief I could stop everything. I was wrong.
Kiritsugu: And I can only apologize for it, even if an apology won't fix everything I did.
Shirou: It's okay, dad. You did your best in a bad situation.
Shirou: At least you helped me.
Kiritsugu: And I can keep helping you! If you want.
Kiritsugu: And if they can actually give me a new body…
Zelretch: Hey, these things take time, so you're just going to have to bear with it.
System: Growing is following the schedule. Soon it will be ready.
System: Good
Shirou: Wait, you can access this as well, System?
System: The System is a part of Host now. So this is nothing for the System.
Kiritsusu's crystal did an anime sweatdrop. 'What has my Son gotten himself into…?' he asked himself in his thoughts.
Kiritsugu: I think we should change subjects now.
Kiritsugu: Shirou. You were told about contacting your sister with your new powers, right?
Shirou: I have.
Shirou: You want me to connect to her with my powers so we can try and help her.
Kiritsugu: I do. I was informed on what will happen in the future if we don't.
Shirou: … Do I want to know?
System: She tries to kill you for making her parents 'forget' and 'abandon' her.
Zelretch: Way to be subtle, System…
Kiritsugu: There are nuances a bit more complex to the story, buuuut, yes, that's the gist.
Kiritsugu: No pressure.
Shirou: I've been hearing that line a lot today…
(Einzbern's Mansion)
A white haired, red-eyed girl was sitting on her bed, her knees to her face, after her day's body modifications due to her family. She had a sad look on her face, after hearing her Grandfather telling her again on how her parents abandoned her for another child. She was trying so hard not to believe that… but she was losing that battle.
This was Illyasviel von Einzbern; Daughter of Kiritsugu Emiya and Irisviel von Einzbern.
Right when she was going to close her eyes, a blue see through box appeared, surprising her.
Shirou Emiya has invited you to the Party.
Do you wish to join?
Y/N
She looked at it and scowled at the name she saw. "What now? I have already too much going on! GO AWAY!" She pressed the N, thinking this was some trick of somesorts, and not wanting to deal with whatever this was or who it was.
(Emiya Household)
Shirou was shocked to see the notice.
Illyasviel von Einzbern has declined your invitation.
"What? Okay I knew she wouldn't want to talk, but she could have at least thought about it for more than a second…"
"Reminder to the Host that Ms. Illyasviel von Einzbern is under her Grandfather's thumb, so she'll be reluctant to talk to the Host after his lies," the System informed.
"Guess I have no choice but to be stubborn," Shirou stated, sending the invite again.
(Einzbern's Mansion)
Not even a second later, the screen appeared again a second later.
Shirou Emiya has invited you to the Party.
Do you wish to join?
Y/N
"I. AM. NOT. INTERESTED!" She pressed the N again. It appeared again.
Shirou Emiya has invited you to the Party.
Do you wish to join?
Y/N
"WHAT'S THIS?! THIS IS HARASSMENT!" She did it again, and again it reappeared.
Shirou Emiya has invited you to the Party.
Do you wish to join?
Y/N
Shirou Emiya has invited you to the Party.
Do you wish to join?
Y/N
Shirou Emiya has invited you to the Party.
Do you wish to join?
Y/N
Shirou Emiya has invited you to the Party.
Do you wish to join?
Y/N
She then pulled at her hair in frustration.
"OKAY! FINE! YOU WIN!" She pressed the Y, accepting this strange invite, none the all happy about it.
Shirou: FINALLY! Hi!
Illyasviel : WHO. THE HELL. ARE. YOU?! WHAT DO YOU WANT?!
Shirou: Talking, for starters. I think I can help you.
Illyasviel: With what, pray tell.
Shirou: What really happened and that your Grandfather is lying to you.
Shirou: And before you start spitting fire, or ripping my head off, literally too, I want you to know I do have solid proof.
Illyasviel: …
Shirou: Just five minutes. That's all I ask.
Illyasviel: You have your five minutes, but you better pray your proof is convincing.
Illyasviel: Or I will be displeased. Violently so.
Kiritsugu: Has your Grandfather really messed you up this much dear?
Illya's eyes widened, tears threatening to spill. "D-Daddy…? N-No this has to be a trick."
Kiritsugu: Let me guess, they told you I was dead, right? How convenient!
Illyasviel: I'm leaving! I will not be tricked by some mind manipulating spell!
Illyasviel: Also, how dare you try and pretend to be father to try and trick me!
(Emiya Household)
Shirou was freaking out, looking through the party options. "Gah! This is bad, I need her to know that that is dad." he thought, seeing the [Voice Chat] opposition.
Kiritsugu: You used to wet the bed whenever I let you watch an Horror movie.
Kiritsugu: You spent days crying when your mother washed your favorite teddy bear.
Kiritsugu: You hate cucumbers.
Kiritsugu: I found you french kissing the poster of your favorite actor once. Lots of tongue.
Kiritsugu: We'd go out in the woods and play "Spot the Chestnut", and I'd always win.
Shirou gave a blank look at what he read. "... Guess that works…"
(Einzbern's Mansion)
Illya was blushing up a storm. No one could know that but-
Illyasviel: STOP!
Illyasviel: …
Illyasviel: D-Daddy?
Illyasviel: I-It's really you?
Kiritsugu: … There is also that time I watched inside your drawer and-
Illyasviel: OKAY IT'S YOU! I GET IT!
Iilya's face was now a deep red, but she was crying tears of joy. But she had to know.
Illyasviel: … Why did you and Mommy abandon me?
Kiritsugu: There is a very faint line between "Hiding somebody in a safe location until danger is over."
Kiritsugu: And "Throwing a family member away". Guess where you are?
Kiritsugu: Didn't help that your Grandfather locked me out, and I was weak from the last war.
Illyasviel: …
Kiritsugu: Little hint: Your grandpa is both a Manipulator and a Moron…
Shirou: And for someone that wants to make humanity live forever, they have a funny way of showing it.
Illyasviel: YOU STAY OUT OF THIS! YOU TOOK PAPA AWAY FROM ME!
Kiritsugu: Are you 5? That sounded like you are 5.
Illyasviel: … No daddy…
Illyasviel: I just… I spent so long without seeing you… I miss you and Mommy…
Kiritsugu: I have a suspect. If I ask you if you have read the letters we sent you.
Kiritsugu: You will answer?
Illyasviel: What letters? I never got any.
Kiritsugu: Exactly.
Illyasviel: … Grandfather intercepted them, or at least one of the maids did.
Kiritsugu: BINGO! See? You are my daughter! Smart and bright!
Illyasviel: Thanks, daddy!
Illyasviel: Are you still there? You can talk, for now.
Shirou: I can see it.
Shirou: Even though I can't see her right now without the Chat feature on.
Illyasviel: … I want to know what you mean, but I might get a headache if so.
Kiritsugu: Let's just say that your adopted brother is blessed by gods.
System: The System is categorized as Outer Being.
System: But for the sake of simplicity, God will suffice.
Illya blinked. Then she panicked.
Illyasviel: WAIT OTHER'S ARE ON HERE AS WELL!?
Illyasviel: AND YOU JUST SAID THOSE EMBARRASSING THINGS IN FRONT OF THEM DADDY!?
Kiritsugu: Ops!
Zelretch: It is cute that your father cares so much about you~
Iilya's face paled to ghost white. Was she really talking to-
Illyasviel: K-K-Kischur Zelretch Schweinorg…
Illyasviel: The founder of the Second Magic…
Illyasviel: D-Daddy… I-Is that really…?
Kiritsugu: OH BOY! You will have a lot of catch-up to do! Get ready!
Right when she was going to read; just then, there was a knock on her door. "Ms. Einzbern, is everything alright in there?" one of the Homunculus maids asked in their monotone voice. "You've been shouting a lot."
'Oh no…' she thought in worry. She typed to the others.
Illyasviel: One of the maid's is outside the door!
Illyasviel: What do I do!? What do I say!?
Kiritsugu: Just tell her to go away, chances are she is tasked by your Grandfather to spy on you.
Kiritsugu: Whatever you say won't matter, she probably has already alerted him.
Illyasviel: I was afraid you were going to say that…
Kiritsugu: That is how golden cages work, sweetie. They are fancy, but still cages.
Shirou: Try saying you're frustrated that you can't seem to get your spells perfectly correct.
Zelretch: That could actually work my boy.
Illya looked at the door, thinking that that might work as well. "I'm fine. Just frustrated with how my Magus spells are not perfect yet. I was doing them in my room to not disturb Grandfather."
"I see, your Grandfather says he's pleased that you're working hard to make sure you keep up the honor of the Einzberns," the maid stated. "Just do not shout so much, that is not how a proper lady acts."
"I will keep that in mind," Illya stated, using her noble tone of voice. "Thank you."
She then heard the maid walk away, letting out a sigh of relief for now.
System: Jezebel.
Shirou: Uh?
Zelretch: Bitch.
Shirou: Ooh!
Illyasviel: LANGUAGE!
Zelretch: Multilingual.
Illyasviel: BLSWDJENYHHBSGY-GAH!
Kiritsugu: Get used to it, honey. He never stops doing that, unfortunately.
Shirou: Be glad you don't live with him…
Zelretch: I did give her Magical Girl Powers in one timeline though.
Illyasviel: Nnooo…
Zelretch: You were very cute.
Illya felt like banging her head on a wall.
System: Ignore him Ms. Illyasviel von Einzbern. We have other matters we need to discuss.
Illyasviel: And you are?
System: The System.
Illyasviel: … And?
System: The System is The System.
Illyasviel: Help?
Shirou: They're known as the Gourmet System.
Shirou: An Elder God Being of selecting the next God of Cooking.
Shirou: I'm supposed to be this… Multiverse's candidate.
System: God of Cooking of the Fate/Natsuvers.
Illyasviel: Why An Eldritch Being from outside Reality wants to train Chefs?
System: They are able to create food, only gods would tease.
System: Host Shirou has the potential to make such dishes.
Illyasviel: Uh! … Could have been worse, at least it's not world domination.
Zelretch: Kinda is, only by cooking better than everybody.
Shirou: Not to mention that Gaia gave me the power you see right now, it's called [The Gamer].
Illya could feel a headache coming.
Illyasviel: How can you talk about it so calmly?!
Shirou: Will panic help me?
Shirou: And a skill called [Gamer's Mind] helps as well.
Illyasviel: So our father fought in a war, you have Gods tutoring you and I am… Here.
Illyasviel: Is there ANYBODY in our family that is normal?!
Shirou: You are considered a roll in a new age of gods led by me for some reason. If that makes you feel better?
Illya was dumbfounded.
Illyasviel: I'm sorry… WHAT!?
Kiritsugu: Darling, please don't panic.
Illyasviel: Daddy. He just said I'm supposed to become a goddess.
Illyasviel: How am I NOT supposed to panic!?
Illyasviel: Furthermore, what would I be the Goddess of!?
Shirou: Righteous Fury and Family Love?
Illyasviel: Should I feel offended? It sounds like I should feel offended…
Kiritsugu: We also considered Magic and War.
Kiritsugu: But apparently there are better candidates.
Shirou: We're… still figuring this out.
Shirou: Still have time to figure this out. Do you want to help me?
Illya was rubbing the sides of her head. First she finds out her father didn't abandon her, next she's offered a position as a goddess by the very brother she thought had stolen her parents' love from her. What's next, her adopted brother being a First Magic User and a Legendary Blacksmith heir?
Zelretch: Would help telling you that you are, just like Shirou, very important in this?
Zelretch: We are not asking you just because, or out of pity.
Zelretch: You are the only one that can do this.
Illyasviel: This is… just a lot to take in…
System: People chosen by Fate do be Great hardly find this easy.
System: Fear is normal.
Illyasviel: But I'm supposed to be the Lesser Grail.
Illyasviel: I'm to die at the next Holy Grail War…
Zelretch: And I wanted to be a fireman, but here I am. Future is not set in stone.
System: And Host Shirou can make something that can fix that.
System: Given time and training that is.
Illyasviel: No pressure.
Shirou: So I am told…
Illyasviel: Been hearing that a lot?
Shirou: Couple of times.
Illyasviel: I see.
Illyasviel: But I do believe we talked enough for now.
Illyasviel: I believe you have other things to do?
Shirou: Training, mostly. Will you be okay in there?
Illyasviel: I'll be fine.
Shirou: I'll keep you in the party for now though.
Shirou: I'll be able to make you stronger through EXP sharing.
Illyasviel: Why are you using RPG terms?
Shirou: Surprise you know what an RPG is with your family.
Shirou: Well, remember when I called my power, [The Gamer]?
Illyasviel: I did not live in a cave, thank you! …
Illyasviel: Oh, God, your new powers are literally Video Game-themed, yes?
Shirou: Most Magus family's look down on technology, so that's why I'm surprised.
Shirou: But yes, for both of them.
Shirou: I'm a Living RPG Warrior Cook.
Illyasviel: Sounds like a bad Chinese Novel.
Shirou: Ha-ha-ha…
Illyasviel: Sorry.
Shirou: But yes, I can make it so you can get stronger though me.
Shirou: And same goes for you when you get EXP as well.
Illyasviel: Makes sense. Do I have to stay here? Or can I leave?
Illyasviel: Please tell me I can leave.
System: You can, but you won't get the EXP if you do.
Shirou: What the System said.
Illyasviel: So I have to stay with Grandfather? Even now that I know the truth?
Shirou: I can't get past your family's barrier's or fly all the way from Japan.
System: The System suggests you think of your Home as an EXP farm though.
Illyasviel: Fine… Can I keep talking with Daddy, though? Please?
Shiroui: I think I can make private chat rooms, so you can.
Illyasviel: Why do you sound unsure?
Shirou: I just got my powers today…
Shirou: I'm still figuring them out…
Illyasviel: Do experiment, it helps growth.
Zelretch: That is on the list of his training.
Illyasviel: … I forgot you were here…
Zelretch: Didn't want to get in the way of two siblings knowing each other.
Illyasviel: How kind of you…
Shirou: How kind of you…
Both siblings were shocked that they wrote the same thing at the same time.
Zelretch: Ha-ah!
Kiritsugu: Aaaaw!
Illyasviel: Don't read too much into this!
Zelretch: Why? Actually afraid of having a brother?
Illyasviel: NO!
Zelretch: Does sound like fear to me! Come on! Give in!
Shirou: Please stop picking on my sister…
"Sister…" Illyasviel kind of found the sound of it strange, and yet endearing.
Zelretch: Come OOOON! Call him Onii-chan!
Illyasviel: DEGENERATE! PERVERT! SCUM!
Kiritsugu: I think we should end it here…
Illyasviel: Maybe we should, daddy.
Zelretch: I will be waiting. It's inevitable.
System: The System can hurt him for you if you like?
Zelretch: NO!
Illyasviel: Yes!
Zelretch: AYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Shirou: System. I still need him to train me.
Shirou: Don't hurt him too much, please.
System: He is still alive, and will remain so until he won't be of use anymore.
Shirou: Anyways.
Shirou: Be strong Sis, I know we'll find a way to help you out.
Shirou: Maybe through my cooking, I can help them get the Third Magic.
Shirou: Father told me that was their reason for doing this.
Illyasviel: So I really was just a means to an end?
Illyasviel: A ticket for the Third Magic? Nothing more?
System: If they were to get The Third Magic without the Grail, they would not need to turn you into the Lesser Grail then.
System: Host Shirou's idea has merit.
Illyasviel: But is it feasible?
System: Possible.
System: Gods of Cooking can do pretty much anything when they cook.
System: Given they have the right ingredients.
System: Host Izuku was able to heal a man fully that had lost most of his organs.
Illyasviel: Most?
System: Among other things.
System: Provided the right Ingredients and Skill, it can happen.
Illyasviel: I'll hold you both to this, okay?
System: Host can make something to undo all the Modifications your Grandfather has done to you.
Illyasviel: As nice as that would be, they'd do it all over again.
Illyasviel: And if you made it so I couldn't be modified, they'd get rid of me, seeing no more use in me.
Illyasviel: Wait until you can make the dish to acquire the Third Magic, and then fix me.
Shirou: Are you sure?
Illyasviel: Hey, if you're going to be going through hell becoming a god, I have nothing to complain about.
Illyasviel: I'll be just as strong as you and daddy.
Illyasviel: Who knows, some of the modifications could stay if they're helpful.
Shirou: Okay, but please ask for help if you need. Please.
Shirou: Pride means nothing if… If you die. Please.
Illya smiled at this. Just having a chat with her new brother was helping her immensely.
Illyasviel: I swear if I need anything, I'll contact you through the chat brother~
Illyasviel: By the way, is daddy going to become a god as well?
Zelretch: Only if you want, Princess. We won't force you.
Zelretch: But yes, we were hoping for you to become one as well.
Kiritsugu: I was informed I was a candidate for God of Intelligence, Magic and Progression.
Kiritsugu: Due to me using technology with my Magus powers.
Illyasviel: OOOH! What about me?!
Shirou: Didn't I give two?
Illyasviel: I thought those were a joke?
Zelretch: No, those are very real. If you accept, that is.
Illyasviel: … Can I think about it? And if others are available to add?
Shirou: I don't see why not?
Shirou: I'm supposed to be God of Cooking, Crafting, Heroic Victory, and, maybe, Smithing if my family tree has who the others think I have.
Kiritsugu: Oooh… THAT…
Kiritsugu: Would be strange to see that theory of your grandpa confirmed.
Shirou: Huh?
Kiritsugu: My father. Your grandfather.
Kiritsugu: Was 100% sure of that ancestry, the rest of the family?
Kiritsugu: Let's say that your grandpa was not thrown into an asylum.
Kiritsugu: Was just out of mercy.
Shirou: I'm not going to ask any further…
Illyasviel: Agreed.
Kiritsugu: Our family has a very peculiar history.
System: We believe Shirou is related to Masamune, due to him possessing the man's heroic spirit.
System: And thanks to him looking like him.
Illya didn't know what to think.
Illyasviel: Were you told about this?
Shirou: Just learned about it.
Shirou: I have amnesia, so I don't know if it's true.
Illyasviel: This family, honestly. Are we actually cursed?
Shirou: … Alaya may have…
Illyasviel: … Do I… ACTUALLY… Want to know?
Shirou: … I may be capable of using the First Magic, so that could be the reason…?
Illya's jaw dropped. D-Did her brother just say that-
Illyasviel: Y-You can use… WHAT!?
Shirou: Still a theory! I think I can use it, I still haven't tested that yet.
System: It was altered, due to this, so we are going to have to alter the alter and fuse it together.
Illyasviel: …
Zelretch: Headache, missy?
Illyasviel: … And I thought Magus' life was already complicated…
System: People destined for Greatness are cursed to not live simple Lives.
Illyasviel: Hurray…
Shirou: Welcome to our new lives sis…
Shirou: Leave sanity at the door…
Shirou: I feel like mine is going…
Zelretch: Oh! Edgy Teens, so nice to work with those.
Illyasviel: SHUT UP!
Shirou: SHUT UP!
Kiritsugu: You don't help much Zelretch…
Zelretch: You people have an abysmal sense of humor.
System: And you have none at all.
Kiritsugu: Ooooh!
Zelretch: Hardyharhaar…
Illyasviel: Hahahahaha!
Illyasviel: …
Illyasviel: YOU HEARD NOTHING!
Shirou: Don't you mean read?
Shirou: This is a chat room.
Shirou: Unless you had voice-to-text on when you laughed?
Illya just blush. She did, indeed, have that on and it sent her laughter.
Illyasviel: Don't you have skills to learn?
Shurou: I do, and I am sure it was a cute laugh.
Illyasviel: SHUSH!
Kiritsugu: I, as her father, can confirm it is.
Illyasviel: DAD!
Illya's blush got even darker. She kind of liked having a normal family conversation though. Even if it is a very strange family hers.
"It's my family. Mine. I won't lose it again." She muttered to herself, determination burning in her eyes.
System: As much as The System likes the progress we've made.
System: I do believe we should get back to our duties.
Illyasviel: BUT!
Kiritsugu: It's okay, darling. This Chat Room is always open.
Kiritsugu: Whenever you feel overwhelmed, just call for us.
Kiritsugu: We will never leave you behind. Promise.
Shirou: Just call, we will talk more.
Shirou: You did say that before.
Illyasviel: I know… but…
Zelretch: You're happier than you have been in five years.
Zelretch: And you don't want to let it go just yet.
Zelretch: You want to have some more fun before you have to go back to what your 'Grandfather' tells you to do.
Zelretch: How close am I?
Illyasviel: Honestly too much.
Illyasviel: Like hitting the nail on the head.
Shirou: He may be a goof most of the time, but he does have his moments of seriousness.
Shirou: Like you just witnessed my sister.
Zelretch: That's because I know what to take lightly and what not.
Zelretch: You brats.
Shirou: Oh. One more thing before we go sis.
Shirou: Get or look into a mirror and look above your head.
Shirou: You should have your title, name and level floating above you, and only you can see it.
Shirou: Because you're in my [Party].
Shirou: You may be able to use other abilities as well, like being able to put stat points in what stats you want.
System: Be careful while testing with it.
System: Don't want your 'Grandfather' to get suspicious of your rapid growth.
Zelretch: Yes… That old Homunculus would demand to have [The Gamer] used on the whole family.
Shirou: As if I would do that.
System: Their Threat Level is below 0, they have no way to force the Host.
Zelretch: But they do have leverage.
Zelretch: Both With Illya, and control and location of the Holy Grail.
Zelretch: Power isn't everything, System. You should know this by now.
Zelretch: Or was the rigged game that Chef Izuku was forced to play, and still won, not enough to show that people will use underhanded tactics?
System: … The System sees your point.
System: But the System also wants to add that Leverage bleeds.
System: Leverage can be killed.
System: And Gods can be erased.
System: But the System will abide for now, and believe in the Host and its Entourage.
System: For now.
Shirou: You wouldn't kill my sister right, System?
System: Host's safety is paramount. If Extreme Solutions become unavoidable. Yes.
Shirou: No way! Not happening!
System: It will be left as a last resort. In case no other solution works.
Zelretch: You people need to remember that an Outer God has very slanted values.
Zelretch: EXTREMELY Slanted values.
Illyasviel: I hope that option never has to come though…
System: Last Resort means Last Resort.
System: Meaning better options will obviously be preferred.
Shirou: Wouldn't my mental safety count as well?
Shirou: If you killed her-
System: [Gamer's Mind] Host.
Shirou: … My own powers betray me…
Zelretch: … Disgustingly slanted values. Borderline sociopathic.
Illyasviel: Hahahaha. Even though this conversation is a mess.
Illyasviel: I feel happy to know that you do care for me.
Illyasviel: Even the Robotic Cooking Elder God in a sense.
System: That tends to happen when you can see all of time and space at the same time.
System: Maybe The System can help you with other Goddess titles for later.
System: But Host Shirou comes first.
Illyasviel: Yes, yes, Linchpin and all that.
Illyasviel: Maybe I have Science since me and my 'family' are good at Magic Science and Alchemy, and I have a knack for it.
Shirou: Adding it with other two~
Shirou: So Science, Righteous Fury and Family Love.
Zelretch: Wouldn't that psycho with the cursed sword be a better one.
Zelretch: For that fury thing?
Shirou: … Who?
Zelretch: The one that wacked me in the testicles twice.
Shirou: Taiga?
Shirou: But I thought we weren't going to get her involved in this?
Zelretch: If you don't want to, it's okay.
Zelretch: It's up to you.
Zelretch: I am just throwing it there, SHOULD you decide to add her.
Shirou: IF she does, I was thinking Goddess of Victory, Fun, Luck and… Tigers…
In town, Taiga felt irritated for some reason, but couldn't tell why.
Zelretch: What? Femininity? Her?
Shirou: You are biased.
Illyasviel: Am I missing something here?
Zelretch: Not much.
Zelretch: Just me being glad that with you we FINALLY have a proper lady joining us.
Taiga felt her anger increase tenfold still, to her confusion.
Shirou: I think we should finish this.
Illyasviel: I believe my brother is right.
Kiritsugu: My children are finally acting like a family!
Kiritsugu: … I need a moment.
System: System detected a lot of tears flooding the holding crystal.
System: Please stop making him cry like a prostitute.
Zelretch: I think you mean…
Illyasviel: Don't you dare curse!
Shirou: Can we get going?
Shirou: We've been here for almost half an hour and I do need to get the other stuff I need to do finished before Taiga gets back with the food ingredients.
Zelretch: Fine, Fine. Whatever you say.
Kiritsugu: You are right.
Illyasviel: Even though I do want to continue talking.
Illyasviel: You are right. And I will need to look at my Titles and all that before my training.
Shirou: Understand.
Shirou: Good luck grinding.
Illyasviel: Thank you.
Illyasviel: You as well brother~
System: Seems your sister is on board with the plan.
System: One new God Candidate down, multiple to go.
(Emiya Household)
Multiple, Shirou kind of feared the sound of that, quite a bit in fact. He closed the chat, but kept the [Party] connected.
"You did not think you and your family would be the only people to become God Candidates, Host Shirou?" The system asked. "Your fate is intertwined with others, and those who are, will be candidates to be chosen."
"I know, it still won't be easy for new gods and goddesses to be born, sense, you know, Magus Society and all that," Shirou pointed out, seeing his sister and dad's levels. "They are… I guess prudes would be the right term… when it comes to magic not being known."
Title: Training Witch of the Third Magic
LV: 23
Illyasviel von Einzbern
Title: Magus Killer
LV: ?
Kiritsugu Emiya
"Dang, dad must be strong if I can't see his level," Shirou stated. "Then again, he did have to fight all kinds of monsters and evil/corrupted Maguses…"
"True, for both of Host Shirou's statements," The System stated. "But with the powers you have, no Magus will be a problem for you."
"True, and I do have to catch up to my sister and other Magus, since I'm very behind," Shirou stated. He then looked at Zelretch. "I'm ready for my next lesson."
Zelretch nodded. "Yes. I do need to teach you how to use magic properly, activate your circuits and give you new skills. That was on the list. As well as what your stats look like."
"... Will activating my circuits hurt?" Shirou asked.
"It will, but your [Gamer's Body] will make it go away after it's finished," Zelretch stated.
"Oh boy…"
(Einzbern's Mansion)
"Young Miss?" Once again, one of the servants so secretly keeping tabs on her, came knocking at the door.
Illya became proper and answered the maid, "Yes. Please tell grandfather that I wish to be trained more. I wish to intensify my training a bit." She went over to the mirror in her room and looked at her head to see where she was at.
Title: Training Witch of the Third Magic
LV: 23
Illyasviel von Einzbern
'Not bad, but I think I can do better,' Illya thought to herself.
"Anything else?" the maid asked.
"Yes, I want books on how to improve my Mage Craft to work harder on it. And something about increasing Focus."
"... Are you sure, Young Miss?"
"DO IT!"
"EEEK!" fast steps soon echoed into the room as the maid ran away.
Now that she had time to herself, she thought about what she was told by her brother. "Let's see if this works. [Status]." Just then her stats appeared.
Name: Illyasviel von Einzbern
Title Occupation: Training Witch of the Third Magic
LV 23
HP: 50
MP: 1350
Strength: 15 (-5)
Dexterity: 10 (-5)
Intelligence: 25 (+50%)
Wisdom: 24 (+50%)
Charisma: 21
Luck: 20
Points: 0
Illya nearly did a faceplant seeing her stats. Her HP was so low and her MP so high. "Okay, I know I'm not that strong, but this is ridiculous!?' she shouted in her head. "What the heck are these negatives and positives I have anyways?" She tapped them and a new screen popped up.
[Flaw Discovered!]
[Body Tampering]
[Body Tampering] (Passive, Active)
[Due to you or someone tampering with your body in accrued fashion,
your body has been severely affected by this.
-5 from all physical stats
This Flaw can be fixed if you get proper treatment for it.]
Illya's eyebrow twitched. "Oh that's just lovely… But at least this thing comes with a personal doctor installed." She then pressed the (+50%), getting another box to appear.
[Perk Discovered!]
[Imperfect Magus Circuits: Rank A]
[Imperfect Magic Circuits: Rank A] (Active)
[Due to you being a Magus and activating your Circuits,
but them being altered and or worked on/added too,
your magical knowhow and use of it gains a standard percent boost.
+50% from all mental stats
This Perk can be refined and turned into Perfect Magic Circuits: Rank A and higher if you find ways to fix and enhance them.
More Circuits Can Also be gained to improve it further as well.]
[Number of Magic Circuits Currently: 25]
Illya's jaw dropped. Her implanted circuits were a perk to her, even if imperfect right now. "... If I can Perfect Magic Circuits and make them Rank S or higher, her Magus powers and Magic would be so useful. And she can awaken more later on. "Must be due to Shirou's powers… If he can make us get the Third Magic though food, it'll be a big help."
There was a knock at her door again. "Young Miss, your Grandfather is ready to train you."
Illya closed the windows and answered. "Thank you for informing me." She then left to go train with her grandfather. But she had one last thought, 'I'll need to tell Shirou and father about my flaws and perks the next time we chat.'
(Emiya Household)
Shirou was groaning from his Circuits being activated. He stretched a bit to get the rest of the soreness out of his body. Shirou and Zelretch were now outside to work on new skills and magic.
"Even with [Gamer's Body], that was very unpleasant. At least I got something new out of it."
[New Perk Created]
[Magic Circuits: Rank C]
[Magic Circuits: Rank C] (Active)
[Due to you being a Magus and activating your Circuits,
your magical knowhow and use of it gains a standard percent boost.
+30% from all mental stats
This Perk can be refined and turned into Perfect Magic Circuits: Rank C and higher if you find ways to fix and enhance them.
More Circuits Can Also be gained to improve it further as well.]
[Number of Magic Circuits Currently: 14]
"Host can refine and increase their Magic Circuits by making foods that are rich in magical energy," The system informed.
"As in?" Shirous asked.
"Any Ingredient coming from Magically-powerful beings. Especially the brain."
"... Isn't eating Brains bad for you…?" Shirou asked, not liking the idea.
"That's only if you consume human brains, Host. Some are actually quite good fried." the System informed.
"... I'll save that meal idea for later… a lot later…" Shirou stated. He turned to Zelretch. "So what are we doing first?"
"First I want you to take a look at your stats," the wizard ordered. "We need to know what we're working with and what [Perks] and [Flaws] you have."
"The more I hear this, the more I feel like a character from an RPG Game." Shirou admitted.
"Not a bad way to describe it, now open the stat window, let's see what we need to work with." Zelretch answered.
"[Status]," Shirou called and his stat sheet appeared.
Name: Shirou Emiya
Title Occupation: The Gamer
LV 10
HP: 25
MP: 20.28
Strength: 5
Dexterity: 5
Intelligence: 6 (+30%)
Wisdom: 4 (-2, +30%)
Charisma: 15 (+5, +2, -2)
Luck: 15
Points: 0
Special Status: Magic Circuits: Rank C (+30% to INT, +30% to WIS)
Perks: - Magic Circuits: Rank C
- God Of Cooking in Training
- Noble
- Gamer (Beginner)
Flaws: - Self Sacrificing
- Lack of Self Worth
Shirou slumped seeing his stats. "I didn't think I was this bad…" Shirou then sees an arrow at his title. He clicked on it and saw he had a few titles.
[Titles Achieved:
The Gamer
Aspiring Chef
Magic Trainee
Universe Lynchpin
Fate's Errand Boy
Enemy of the Grail]
Shirou clicked on the [Aspiring Chef] title to see what it does.
[Aspiring Chef: This title is given to those who can cook a meal perfectly that is a few levels higher than them. This title lets you gain X5 EXP for the skill [Cooking] and brings the level of cooking ingredients down by 10.]
Shirou was surprised, so he checked the other titles to see what they did.
[Fate's Errand Boy Increases the chances the User is in the right place at the right time (And Vice-versa) to help Fate remain in the right course. You gain a +50% to LUC when equipped.]
[Enemy of the Grail: When this title is Equipped: Summoned Champions and the ones linked to them are subconsciously drawn to find the User. The likelihood of them being Hostile depends on their Alignment.]
[Universe Lynchpin: As a Chosen Candidate for the God of Cooking, you are deeply linked to the Fate of the world. Bonus 5% in stats at level-up if your Alignment remains in the Good area.]
[Magic Trainee: You are an inspiring wizard and want to learn all you can about the arcane magics. +5% EXP gains to all [Magic] skills until you gain the next title [Magic Apprentice].]
Zelretch whistles reading those titles and effects. "So far, so good~"
"I will have to trust you on that, it still sounds too complex to me."
"Small steps, my boy. Learn to walk before learning to run!"
"System suggests placing [Aspiring Chef] as your title," The System stated.
"Of course you'd want him to have that, Almighty Microwave…" Zelretch stated in a flat tone of voice.
"Testicle twisting protocol initiated."
"KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
"System…" Shirou scolded the Elder God. "Please stop torturing my teacher."
"Disciplinary actions assure the victim will learn manners."
Shirou gave a flat look. "This is Zelretch we're talking about, you'd have a better time teaching a cat to take orders than him."
"OI!" said man shouted in indignation.
"Am I wrong?"
He just grumbled and ordered, "Just get to your perks brat."
Shirou skipped the [Magic Circuits] one sense he already knew what they did, and tapped the [God Of Cooking in Training] perk.
[God Of Cooking in Training]
[God Of Cooking in Training] (Active)
[God Of Cooking in Training is given to those who have been chosen by the Gormaint System to become a univer's/multiver's God of Cooking.
+5 Perception.
(Each point in Perception increases Sixth Sense, Sight and Intuition Powers)
+20% EXP gains to [Observe] Skill
+20% EXP Gains to the [Cooking] Skill
This perk can level up to God Of Cooking after you pass the Gormaint System's test.]
Shirou looked confused at the [+5 Perception]. "Uh… what does that do?"
"It's a battle senses to know where everything is to you. See it as you becoming more aware of everything around you, pretty much." Zeletch informed him.
"Also known as Situational Awareness, Host." System added.
"Yes, that."
"Think I'll make those skills later on?" he asked the two. "Would be useful."
"Well there is Clevoinces, so it could be," Zeletch told him. "That is a magic spell to see everything."
"Might teach you Haki from the One Piece Universe as well, Host," the System added. "Based on your past actions, you act recklessly when trying to help others… And you need to stay alive…"
Shirou looked away, not saying anything and looked at the [Noble] perk.
[Noble]
[Noble] (Active, Passive)
[You are the Knight in Shining Armor. You're willing to help everyone you talk to and try to improve their lives. Even swon the ladies as well.]
+5 to CHA
(Each point adds a small percentage of success when talking/Interacting with others)
+20% Bonus in Defense (Physical and Magical) when protecting others.
Warning: This perk can be lost if you do too many unnoble deeds and must be reworked to attain it back.]
"The 20% Bust to my Defense when protecting people is good," Shirou stated. "Guess it adds to my Strength and Dexterity then."
[Due to figuring something out
Your Int and Wis have increased by 1]
Name: Shirou Emiya
Title Occupation: The Gamer
LV 10
HP: 25
MP: 40.95
Strength: 5
Dexterity: 5
Intelligence: 7 (+30%)
Wisdom: 5 (-2, +30%)
Charisma: 15 (+5, +2, -2)
Luck: 15
Points: 0
"[Luck 15] Is a good starting point?" Shirou asked.
"What do you mean?" Zelretch asked back.
"If [Luck] does what I think it does, I can get good items and ingredients from finding good deals and drops," Shirou stated.
"Bingo."
"Said in a monotone is a bit creepy, System."
"Apologies."
"It is fine," Shirou stated. "I am glad I got more Magic through that notice. Good thing I can gain stats other ways. Guess I'll need to train them and not use stat points all the time."
[Due to thinking things out logically
Your Int and Wis have increased by 1]
Now Shirou just pouted at that. "Hey, I'm not that bad…"
"You are starting. You youngsters have lots to learn before becoming proper adults, like me, so I am not surprised." Zelretch answered, smug.
Shirou just picked the next perk.
[Gamer (Beginner)]
[Gamer (Beginner)] (Active, Passive)
[This Perk is given to those that get [The Gamer] at a young age to help them out.
+10% bonus EXP when Using Gamer Skills. This bonus disappears at the Evolution of the Skill into Intermediary Level.]
"It's a good way to help New Users get the hang of it." Zelretch commented, humming.
"Does this [+10%] also count for [Leveling] myself up?" Shirou asked. A ten present bonus would be great in grinding.
"Yes, Host. It influences the Normal Experience acquisition as well."
"That's good to know," Shirou stated, now done with the perks, now the flws. When he saw [Self Sacrificing] as a flaw, he looked confused.
[Self Sacrificing]
[Self Sacrificing] (Active, Passive)
[You are willing to put your life on the line to help others, to the detriment of your open wellbeing. Not saying it isn't noble, but you jump in without a plane and just wing it. You do look heroic in doing so though.
-2 to WIS
+2 to CHA
Note: This Flaw can become a Perk if you willing work and think on your actions. You'll gain +2 to WIS later on]
Shirou looked sheepish. "I-I guess I do jump into the fire without thinking. But I guess gaining those two powers later on will help turn this into a perk."
"Indeed." Zelretch said.
Shirou got another box to pop up.
[Due to thinking deep thoughts
Your Int and Wis have increased by 1]
Shirou gave a flat look. "I don't know whether to feel annoyed or happy…"
"How about being amused?" Zelretch questioned.
"Har. Har. Har."
"Very amusing." Zelretch answered, grumbling.
"Just see it as a warning, you can gain points easily, but you can lose them just as easily. So be careful."
"From Stats Effects and Flaws most of the time, Host," the System informed.
Shirou nodded, then turned to look at the last one. He was worried about the last one, [Lack of Self Worth]. … Did he really see himself like that?
[Lack of Self Worth]
[Lack of Self Worth] (Active. Passive)
[Your lack of Trust in yourself and your Skills holds you back, stopping you from reaching your full potential.
- 2 CHA
Note: This Flaw can be removed in understanding that you have worth and people care for you because of your actions.]
Shuirou looked away.
"Wo! Wo! Nothing to be ashamed of! It's okay! We'll fix that too! I am here for this too! Cheer-up! Your Dad too will help!" Zelretch tried to cheer him up immediately.
"Thanks."
"The System believes you think like that because you have amnesia due to the fire, and wanting to prove yourself to your father," the System stated.
"... Please don't psychoanalyze me. I … I still can't talk about it. Sorry."
"Understood, Host. But you will need to seek help if you want to push past this and be who you want to be in life."
"Whenever you are ready." Zelretch added.
"Thank you. I might do it when I get better and have the confidence to speak about my troubles. … If there are doctors in the magus community for psychology…"
"How about I teach you some skills? That sounds like it should help?" Zelretch asked, changing the topic.
"And after that The System will start introducing Host in his training regimen."
"... Thank you." Shirou said with a small grateful smile, accepting the distraction with open arms.
He nods to the boy. "So what would you like to learn first?"
"Something about strengthening myself? I am not exactly somebody you see and think 'He is strong', so…"
"Hhmmmm… How about… [Meditation]? It's more for magic replenishing, but there are some skills you need to help focus your mind and body with it. Like Mashlearts. Get it high enough and you can use it moving around."
"Oh!"
"AND it's a good way to chase off bad vibes. You find your center again, calm your nerves and recover your Inner Peace, very relaxing. As well as enter your mindscape if you have a high enough level or evolve it."
Shirou blinked. "So I can enter my reality marble without having to summon it?"
"More or less, that is more on the advanced side of it. But finding a connection with your inner cosmos is a good first step towards it."
"Baby steps?"
"Yep!"
"The System suggests you start now to gain it," the System stated.
Shirou and Zelretch both took a meditating seat. They were like that for a few minutes, until Shirou heard a ping.
[A new skill has been created through a special action.
The skill [Meditation] has been created.]
[Meditation]
[LV 1]
[98.50% till next level]
[The Ancient Art of Meditation: Link yourself with the will of the Cosmos, and elevate your Spirit to new Heights.]
[Increase HP recovery per minute by WIS while meditating.
Increase MP recovery per minute by WIS while meditating.
Increase your Magic Circuits amount and Rank the longer you meditate.
WIS can be trained through meditation.]
[Through repeated meditation,
your WIS has increased by one!]
[Your Magic Circuit Amount has gone up by one]
[Your Magic Circuits Ranks are now C+]
"... Huh, guess I can train my [Wisdom] through this as well, good to know. I'm almost at 100 MP now."
"Meditation is all about Mind Power, Spiritual Cultivation and Inner Strengthening, you'll see how nicely you will be able to increase your stats in that regard like this."
"And less anxiety is good too."
"That too."
"So it helps [Gamer's Mind] as well," Shirou stated. "Good to know my Circuits went up as well, wonder what my percentage is now?
[Magic Circuits: Rank C+] (Active)
[Due to you being a Magus and activating your Circuits,
your magical knowhow and use of it gains a standard percent boost.
+35% from all mental stats
This Perk can be refined and turned into Perfect Magic Circuits: Rank C+ and higher if you find ways to fix and enhance them.
More Circuits Can Also be gained to improve it further as well.]
[Number of Magic Circuits Currently: 15]
"I expect you to exploit every loophole you meet, my boy! Eyes open if you stumble on one!" Zelretch said with a chuckle.
"Hey, I still have regular Magic Circuits, they're not perfect yet," Shirou states. He then did the math in his head, not wanting to look at his stats just yet. "Okay, so taking into account the adding in the percentage multiplier and subtracting the minus two to my wisdom… I have a 106.92 MP full bar."
Zelretch clapped the boy's intellect. "Those added bonuses are really doing wonders for you.
[Due to solving a difficult math problem in your head
Your Int and Wis have increased by 1] X3
"The System must say, Host Shirou is doing quite well already," the System complimented him.
Shirou rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. "Well I wanted to see if I could do it by calculating my MP through my head. I didn't think it would give me three for figuring it out though."
"Want to calculate agin to see if you gain more Shirou?' Zelretch asked him.
Shirou thought about it, and shrugged. "Sure, I'm at 208.17 now." After he said that,
[Due to solving a difficult math problem in your head
Your Int and Wis have increased by 1] X3
"Impressive lad, see? This is the Perk of being an Initiated, until you advance, the perks are very tasty!" Zelretch complemented.
[New Perk Created]
[Math Genius]
[Some people simply are born with a gift for Number-Crunching, you too have such a scholarly gift, Nerd!
+10 to INT
Warning: This Perk can be lost if you slack off too much on doing Mathematics in your head. Writing them down is safe though.]
"Besides the jab, I actually like that," Shirou admitted, chuckling.
"Host Shirou's Magic pool has increased an incredible amount just in one day," The system satted.
"...Yes?"
"I too find that statement worrying." Zelretch admitted.
"Have no fear, this only means that The System will be able to go all-out in training the Host."
"We ARE scared now!" Both admitted.
"B-But my Strength and Dexterity are still five though," Shirou stated.
"No pain, no gain, Host. Pain makes you stronger!"
"Please be gentle."
"No."
"At least you tried, my boy." Zelretch answered.
[A new skill has been created through a special action.
The skill [Danger Sense] has been created.]
[Danger Sense]
[LV 1]
[99.50% till next level]
[Due to having a sense of danger, you become more aware of it than others. You can smell trouble, hear it arrive and, hopefully, brace for impact before anybody else!
+10 to DEX
Get warnings on oncoming threats. Will increase at higher levels on to where it comes from and detailed Threat Level.]
Shirou gulped after reading that. Good news, his HP went up… bad news.. He was going to be in a world of pain… May the gods have mercy on the poor boy.
"Mercy is for the Weak."
"Oh God…" Shirou whimpered.
To Be Continued…
And there's chapter two everyone~!
Taiga: "... I'm worried about Shirou now…"
Joy: He is the Main Character and has to fill two very big roles as God of Cooking and [The Gamer]. Training will be hard, but believe in him as me and Light do, he will do great things.
Taiga: "I still want to train him in Swordsmanship and Archery next time."
We can do that, and get him some RPG and TRPG guides to help him out, and give him some new ideas. Still want him to learn [Mana Bolt] from The Gamer comic.
Joy: The More the Merrier, at least he will be ready for everything he will need to face, he is a good boy, so he won't mind some extra training from a friend.
Taiga: "I guess you're right. We should end this now though."
True. We do hope you enjoyed this chapter, and please leave a comment on the chapter.
Joy: Keep following for more, and don't forget to Kudo on AO3 if you haven't already, or put a like and etc. Those too never hurt, but are much appreciated! Thank you for reading!
And with that, we'll see you next chapter.
Taiga: (Lazy salute) "See ya."
Joy: BYEEEEE! See you next Chap!
Be safe, and see you all next time.
Please R&R
Links to my Co-Writer's pages:
archiveofourown users/ JoySeeker101/ pseuds/ JoySeeker101
fanfiction u/ 4123328/