Chapter 6

Vaughn tensed at the sight of her. He knew seeing her again was going to be almost has hard as it was to bury her but he didn't expect her to be dressed like that. Shit. He thought. I can't do this with her looking like that. He remained standing next to the couch with his hands in his pockets, not sure what his first move should be. Vaughn was flooded with too many emotions to choose which one to act on. Sydney made the first move.

Sydney ran into his arms. The towel that she had meticulously wrapped around her head fell to the ground and her wet hair dropped down her back in a tangled mess. Being in her lover's arms again seemed to fade the rest of the world to black. She pressed her body to his as if trying to melt them together into one. Sydney buried her face into the crook of Vaughn's neck and breathed in his scent. Her body went limp as all the stress of the past two days escaped her body as she exhaled. The way he held her, his scent, everything about this man, made Sydney feel at peace. She was truly home.

Of all the things Vaughn had ever experienced in his life, nothing could ever compare to the feeling he had as he stood there holding her again. There were no words to describe the love he felt for this woman. There was only the burning impulse he had to never let her go. Vaughn had dreamed about this moment a million times during the past two years. He couldn't count the number of times he wished that it was all a mistake, a nightmare from which he would wake up to find Sydney nestled next to him, sleeping.

Now, Vaughn was too scared to move. That if he did, somehow all this would go away. What if he was dreaming? He had been fooled by his dreams before. He pulled her closer to him. I can still feel her. Ok, I'm not dreaming. He convinced himself.

They loosened their grips on each other and Sydney pulled back just enough to look at Vaughn. A smile spread across both their faces. Sydney slowly leaned in to kiss Vaughn but stopped as he cupped her face with his hands. He wiped way any traces that she had been crying. He studied her face as if her were trying to memorize every microscopic thing about it. Vaughn pushed a strand of hair that had fallen into Sydney's eyes back behind her ear. He looked deep into her eyes.

" I couldn't believe it when Eric told me," Vaughn whispered in disbelief.

" I wanted to but my heart wouldn't let me, not until I was able to see and hold you again." Vaughn smiled. "And here you are, in my arms and I'm afraid to let go, afraid this is all a dream." Vaughn pulled Sydney into another hug.

"From the moment I woke up in that alley, all I could think about was you." Sydney said. Her words muffled from her lips being pressed into Vaughn's shoulder as they hugged. "I was afraid something had happened to you. No one would tell me anything."

Vaughn stepped back and lead Sydney over to the couch. He sat her down and then took a seat on the coffee table facing her, taking her hands in his. Sydney felt a cold, hard, metal against her right hand. She looked down and saw a gold band on Vaughn's left ring finger. Sydney looked back up at Vaughn, a confused look on her face, then back down at his hand.

"Vaughn…what is going on? Wh…why are you wearing that ring?" Finding her voice, she forced the question out.

Vaughn avoided looking at Sydney and found a spot on the floor to focus on. He knew that she understood what the ring symbolized and the look on her face sent a stabbing pain through his heart. Telling her that he was married was going to hurt her and it killed him to have to do it.

"Syd, I came here tonight for two reasons." Vaughn began. " The first being that, when Eric called me and told me you were alive I had see you with my own eyes. The second reason is that what I am about to tell you should come from me and no one else."

Vaughn paused, stood up, and began pacing around the living room. Sydney tracked his every move, the look of confusion only deepening on her face.

" I can't believe what you're about to tell me." Syd said, shaking her head.

Vaughn stopped pacing and sat back down across from Sydney forcing himself to look into her eyes. He owed her that much.

" When you died it devastated me. I loved you so much that I couldn't think straight. I didn't care about anything or anyone. I couldn't see that I was killing myself. Everybody around me saw it happening. Friends, family, they all tried to help, but there was nothing left in me to care. Finally, I had to leave. I turned in my resignation letter at the CIA and left the country."

"Vaughn, how…..?" Sydney began but Vaughn stopped her.

"Please Sydney, let me finish." Vaughn continued at a quickened pace.

" I moved to France and began teaching. That's where I met my wi…." Vaughn couldn't get the word to come out of his mouth. He tried again.

"That's where I met Lauren. It was only recently that we moved back to the states because of her job. She's an agent for the NSA."

Sydney felt betrayed and sickened at what Vaughn was telling her. She could taste the bile at the back of her throat and she felt like vomiting. Sydney's confusion was now replaced by anger. Her skin crawled at the mention of his wife's name. She didn't want to know her name. Sydney didn't want to know any of this. Vaughn could see her anger growing.

"Sydney, you need to know that I would have broken every law, rule, or protocol, killed anyone I had to keep you safe. Even now, I would lay down my own life to keep you safe. I………"

"Bullshit" Sydney said coldly.

"What's bullshit?"

"What's bullshit is that you can stand there and go on about how much you loved me, and how devastated you were when you thought I was dead, and that you would die for me, all while wearing that ring! It's bullshit that you fed me some line about your father's watch and it stopping the day we met and you turning around and practically getting a new life!!!!" Sydney fought to keep the tears back. She was too angry to let him see her cry.

"My feelings for you are not bullshit!" Vaughn's voice began to rise. "You have no idea what I've been through the past two years!"

"You just told me…let me see if I got it right" Sydney started, counting on her fingers, each point she was making.

"You first quit the CIA, then you went off to France, met some woman, fell in love, got married, and moved back here all within the span of two years. Did I leave anything out?"

"You are being so unfair. You were dead." Vaughn said defensively.

" I'm sorry that you lost two years of your life. I can't tell you how sorry I am that I wasn't able to keep you safe. If I were able to, things would be different right now between you and me. Life dealt us a shitty hand and I'm not apologizing for moving on with my life. You can stand there and question the choices I've made over the past two years. You can think of me as a bastard if you want, but don't stand there a question my love for you. About my father's watch…when I told you about it, I meant what I said."

Vaughn waited for a reply from Sydney. She stood up from the couch, picked up the towel that had fallen form her head onto the floor and said, " I think you should go."

She turned away from Vaughn and headed to the bedroom door. She never looked back as she quietly shut the door leaving Vaughn standing alone. After the shock had warn off a bit about what just went on between himself and Sydney, Vaughn walked to the front door, grabbed his jacket from the hook it had been hanging on, put it on and stepped out into the cold dark night.

After saying goodbye to Vaughn, Eric had gotten up from the rocking chair he had been frozen to and went back inside. A frozen ass was the price he had to pay for giving Vaughn and Sydney some privacy. The temperature felt like it had dropped to twenty degrees as he sat there trying not the hear everything that was being said inside.

He walked over the fireplace and began to slowly thaw out. He was just beginning to get the feeling back in his fingers when he heard a soft sound coming from the bedroom. Eric overheard most of what was said between Vaughn and Sydney and he felt sorry for both of them. Glad not to be in either of their shoes, Eric still hurt for both of his friends. He wanted to be there for both of them. Right now, Sydney needed it. Eric walked over to the bedroom door, and was just about ready to knock when he heard the quiet sobs. Thinking that it would be best to just leave her alone for tonight, Eric walked away from the bedroom and over to the couch. He unfolded his blanket, fluffed up his pillow, and laid there waiting for the sobbing to stop. After a few hours, Eric was sure that Sydney had cried herself to sleep. He closed his eyes a drifted off to sleep as well.

End of Chapter 6